


Some Corner of a Foreign Field

by neela



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Post-Apocalypse, Angst, Complete, F/M, Five Stages of Grief, Friendship/Love, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-17
Updated: 2015-02-28
Packaged: 2017-12-08 18:51:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 30
Words: 239,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/764818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neela/pseuds/neela
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With a Wraith superhive about to attack Atlantis, Colonel Samantha Carter had hoped for reinforcements from Earth. Instead she got refugees from an abandoned SGC and the message: "Earth is lost." </p><p>Apoca!fic. AU post-EatG. John/Sam</p><p>Some edits July 2015 (chapter 5, 7 & 8)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Disclaimer and notes

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by "The Soldier" by Rupert Brooke and Ecclesiastes 3:1-8.
> 
> AU premise:  
> Sam went back to Earth in season 5 and attended both Baal's extraction ceremony and General Hammond's funeral, but reclaimed command of Atlantis about mid-season. The superhive never picked up the message containing Earth's location in "Enemy at the Gate" (from "Vegas"), and thus that episode never happened. This story begins approximately a month after EATG should have happened, during Christmas 2009. Established John/Sam relationship.
> 
> A wave of gratitude goes out to Lone-ranger1 and alicesandra for invaluable feedback and beta reading. Your thoughts and inputs have helped make this story what it is.

 

 

 

  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own any part of the Stargate franchise. It all belongs to MGM. 

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Below, you will find a link to a timeline of the events (chapters) that occur in this story. You may confer with this if you are confused about the "Day 1" and "Day 81" labels. 

[Some Corner of a Foreign Field](http://www.dipity.com/dreigiau/Some-Corner-of-a-Foreign-Field/) on Dipity. (Edit May 2017: Dipity seems a bit unstable and is currently down. A back-up has been created.)

[Some Corner of a Foreign Field](https://www.timetoast.com/timelines/some-corner-of-a-foreign-field) on TimeToast. (New May 2017)

* * *

 

 

**Author's note:**

So here it is. This was my first attempt at Stargate fan fiction and sci-fi in general. Still don't know quite how it will turn out yet, but I know I won't leave anyone hanging forever. There will be closure!

Expect further angst, romance, action, hopefully a bit of humor, and perhaps some wise thoughts thrown into the mix. The chapters will vary in size, so expect some to be larger or smaller than others. Consider it a bit like a series of moments, where you have to fill in a bit of what happens in-between, as I won't write a strictly chronological story that follows day-by-day. There will be leaps of time between chapters.

Be warned, and if you like it/don't like it, please let me know. I appreciate any constructive criticism, whether it's regarding my language, characterisation, plot or something else.


	2. Day 1

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the Stargate universe and its characters. It all belongs to MGM and Sci-Fi channel. Only the Original Characters belong to me.

* * *

* * *

**ONE | "If I should die…"**

_Prompt: A time to die_  
Music: Beethoven, Symphony no. 7 in A Major, Op. 92, 2nd movement: Allegretto

* * *

**DAY 1**

" _Hey, you're talking to a man who has laughed in the face of death, sneered at doom and chuckled at catastrophe!"_

Major General O'Neill's grin on the monitor was familiar and Sam couldn't help but snort despite the tears gathered in her eyes. Only he would quote  _Wizard of Oz_  at the most heartbreaking moment of their time.

"Sir…" she said, her voice taking on a sad note.

O'Neill's eyes softened and Sam suddenly felt like she was exposed. She was consciously aware of everyone around her following their conversation on the monitors, of the swirling sound of the open wormhole, and of the strong, warm presence just a few feet behind her.

" _I know, Carter, I know."_ O'Neill's voice became mute and resigned.

Sam's smile fell as tears started trailing down her cheeks. Her hands fisted and she was tempted to reach back to that comforting presence, to grasp his hand tightly, but she couldn't. Not now. She had to be strong. All eyes were on her now: the one who would be in command once the connection closed.

O'Neill's eyes glinted a bit as he reacted to whatever he saw from his side of the monitor.  _"Now wait just a minute, people! No shedding tears, you hear?"_

He gave his best commanding tone, and Sam immediately wiped her tears off. She noticed several others were sniffing in the background.

"Yes, sir."

Again, his eyes softened and he seemed to seek her personally, lowering his voice just a little.  _"Don't worry, Carter. You'll be fine. You've got the best, and some of the worst, Earth had to offer."_ He paused, most likely thinking about the particular people he was referring to, who unfortunately was somewhere in the gate room at the moment. _"Try not to strangle 'em_."

"Yes, sir," Sam said, managing another smile. The Major General smiled at her.

" _That's what you keep, Carter. Don't stop smiling. That's an order."_

"Sir—"

" _Sam…"_

O'Neill looked at her fondly and Sam met his gaze, even though she was acutely aware of the other people in the gate room, especially the one standing behind her. She knew what was coming. They were both trying to portray all their feelings and thoughts across the screen and the millions of light-years that separated them. She felt nauseated.

"Jack…" Sam's voice was tinged with pain, and her throat constricted.

Even now, after almost thirteen years of service and standing on the brink of the abyss, they found the words difficult to say. Sam's hands clenched and O'Neill simply stared at her with that  _something_  in his features. The  _something_  she still found herself responding to, even if that train had passed long ago.

Their gaze was broken by klaxons going off in the background. Startled, Sam and the rest of the gate room realised quickly it was not coming from their end, which meant…

O'Neill's face was drawn and, even though he smiled, he was sad.  _"Looks like this is it, Carter."_

Sam's tears welled up once more and, despite her promise, she couldn't keep them from falling. The presence behind her stepped close enough to touch. Even if they weren't holding hands, Sam felt his warmth and silent strength. She couldn't look at him, however, and instead directed her eyes elsewhere and saw people were reacting to the news, all in their own different ways. Some cried, some were solemn, some stood on their own, and some clutched their neighbours. Yet everyone was as resigned as the people on the other end of the connection.

Behind Major General O'Neill, Walter Harriman and a few other SGC technicians were sitting by the gate controls, typing away at the computer systems Sam had once built from scratch. They were quiet, resigned, staring at one another before moving to their stations. All of them were prepared for what was to come.

Major General Landry stepped up to O'Neill and gave an acknowledging nod to Sam through the monitor. O'Neill gazed at the people on his end and then turned back to Sam, his shoulders square and his back straight.

" _Take care, Colonel, all of you. You're the last of us."_ He looked at every one of them, then added with a light tone, _"Oh, and tell Daniel I'll know if he works through the night again. I'll come haunt him this time."_

The last attempt at humour raised a bittersweet smile on Sam's lips. Several of the people gathered in the gate room snorted, including the man almost holding her hand.

Sam raised her chin in response, straightening her back. "We will, sir."

O'Neill cleared his throat and Sam almost imagined tears gathering in his eyes, but Major General Jack O'Neill would never look like he had anything but calm control, if not a little confusion added to the mix.  _"Well then… From all of us, to all of you: A very Merry Christmas."_

"The same to you, sirs, from all of us." Sam's throat was thick as she raised her hand in a perfect salute, seeing in the corner of her eye that every military personnel did the same.

On the monitor, the two Major Generals and the remaining skeleton SGC personnel saluted in turn and smiled, and then the screen went black. Milliseconds later, the wormhole  _whooshed_ closed.

No one said a word as silence fell over the gate room. Sam felt like she was tethering on the edge, hands fisted to remain in control. She fought back her tears and straightened her back. Looking around, she saw both people she had served with for years and newcomers to the base holding their own, some crying openly, some just waiting.

Sam found the gate technician's eyes and ordered firmly, "Chuck, dial the gate."

The Canadian sergeant snapped into action with only a second's hesitation.

As the gate began to dial, the people who had gathered in the operations centre shuffled slowly to the balconies overlooking the gate. Sam found herself standing next to John and Rodney, and sought her 2IC's eyes just as the seventh chevron locked.

While Chuck punched the final coordinate, John met her gaze silently and Sam suddenly wished she were somewhere else. Somewhere where the mantle of command belonged to someone else and she could be simply  _Sam,_ and he could be…

"Eight chevron will not lock."

Sam's burning eyes closed and she reached out for something to hold on to. John's hand was there, clutching hers as strongly as she did his.  _I'm here. I'm not gone._

"Are—Are you sure you got it right?" Rodney's voice broke through the tense silence. "I—I mean, did you punch the right chevron?"

"Rodney…" John's voice was just beside her. Sam opened her eyes, seeing how her fellow scientist's wide eyes flickered from person to person, all of them staring at him with varying degrees of hope and defeat in their features.

"I'm serious! What if there's a malfunction in the dialling sequence, or there's power fluctuations messing with the gate's distribution nodes, disrupting the connection to the final chevron, or—"

"Rodney," said Sam pointedly, shutting him up momentarily. He stared at her, mouth open, a tablet already in his hands. She swallowed. "There's no malfunction."

"There's got to be something, something we haven't tried—"

"McKay, let it go!" John seemed to finally reach through to the Canadian scientist, halting him completely. He stood with a forlorn look on his face. Sam stared pointedly at the gate as John lowered his voice, which sounded oddly detached, and said, "They're gone."

Slowly, everyone looked at each other, coming to the same realisation.

No further evacuations. No further twisting brains together in search of an answer as time ran out. No further supply runs. According to Major General O'Neill, every last resort had been tried and failed. There was simply nothing more they could do. This was it.

Earth was gone and they were on their own, stranded on the only base that bore traces of their home world. Atlantis was now the final hope for survival for the Fifth Race.

Sam met John's eyes and saw all her fears mirrored there.

_What now?_

After a painstakingly long moment, Sam withdrew from John's gaze and subsequently let go of his hand. She turned to face Zelenka, who stood next to the Lantean monitors with a lost look on his face, his glasses forgotten in his hands. "Radek. What's the status on the Wraith Hive ships?"

The Czech scientist stared at her incomprehensively for a moment before Rodney jolted him out of his stupor. Jump-started into activity and brain function, Zelenka pushed several buttons and the monitors woke to life once more with the picture Sam had memorised for the past week. Five Hive ships, one of which was reported powered by a ZPM.

"Ehrm," Zelenka stuttered, half-wringing his hands. "They'll be here in less than a week."

Sam closed her eyes. The evacuation could not have come at a worse time.

* * *

 

****Next:**  **"Don't hug me."

* * *

 


	3. Day 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is a time for everything, even if it is to refrain from hugging.

****

* * *

**TWO | "Don't hug me."**

_Prompt: a time to refrain from embracing._

* * *

**DAY 2**

Sixteen hours after the connection to Earth disrupted and failed to reconnect, John found himself back in the stargate operations centre, where technicians were working on completing the preparations for Atlantis' next move. It'd been sixteen sleepless hours in which John had been practically everywhere in the city, both getting an overview of the Earth evacuees and the Pegasus refugees as well as making sure they were settled. Only the children who ran around had given him a reason to smile.

Ascending the final staircase into the operations centre, John's eyes went automatically to the glass office on the other side of the walkway. It was empty. Frowning, John stopped and glanced around the operations centre. He found his target leaning over one of the operations consoles, talking lowly with Amelia Banks.

"Colonel," he greeted her, giving her a small smile.

Sam did not return it. "Colonel. How did it go with the evacuees?"

She only gave him a sideward glance and then looked back at the console's connected tablet computer. John pushed down a sudden feeling of uneasiness and shifted on his feet.

"They're all rattled, but settling in for now. Major Lorne's down there keeping an eye on them. Which reminds me, the IOA guys want to talk to you," he added with a grimace. Out of all the evacuees, John had found the surviving IOA representatives the most difficult to deal with. He wasn't a politician.

"They'll have to wait," Sam said, her tone curt and short. She leaned over Banks to input a few commands into the console. "Zelenka just checked in. The power conduits have been fixed and Rodney's connected the ZPM they brought from Earth. I've ordered everyone to report to their stations or otherwise stay in their quarters. We're nearly ready to go."

"Oh." John didn't quite know how to respond to that. It seemed like Sam had everything in order.

He studied her, taking in her appearance and posture. Rigid shoulders, drawn lips, focused eyes. Nothing indicated that she had been up some thirty-odd hours without sleep except the slight paleness of her skin and the bushy strands of hair that had escaped her ponytail.

But she seemed  _dull_ , like she was working on automatic. Not the kind where she was completely engrossed in some scientific or mathematical problem, but something John had never seen before. He was disturbed to realise that he didn't recognise this side of her, but he thought he had a pretty good idea of  _why_  she had ended up like this.

For the past sixteen hours, John had seen a lot of different reactions as he walked around Atlantis. Denial, anger, bargaining... People had begged him to do things, to say things, but it would've all been lies and ignorance of the fact that  _it_   _had happened._

Earth was gone. No stargate connection meant no one to receive the call.  _It had happened._ John didn't know whether it was due to the enemy attack or the self-destruct, but they could no longer reach Earth. The ramifications were hard to swallow, particularly now when they had a whole other shitload of problems to handle.

As John watched Sam talk with Banks, he recalled the transmission from the SGC and Major General O'Neill.  _The_  General O'Neill, he reminded himself. The one who meant as much to Sam as Elizabeth did to him, and John knew what it was like to lose someone like that. Which was why, when Sam moved away from the operations console to work on a sole monitor in the background, John saw his opportunity and approached her.

"Sam…" His voice was low, aware of any eavesdroppers. "I realise this isn't the time, but when's the last time you had a break?"

"I don't know," said Sam, her tone clearly detached. She focused on the monitor where equations and schematics rolled down at high speed. "We've been busy."

"Sam…" John sighed and stepped closer. He noticed immediately how she tensed up and refrained from touching her. He hesitated. "You should sit down for a minute. The Wraith won't be here for another four days. We've got time."

"I can't," Sam said dismissively, still not looking at him.

"Sure you can," said John, a bit annoyed now. "Just step away from the monitor and into your office. It doesn't even have to be a minute. Just—"

"John."

Their eyes met.

It was nothing like those first moments in bed, when she giggled and looked like ten years had been shaved off her age, utterly beautiful. Nor was it like those small moments in-between command where he'd made her smile at something silly he said, and they shared a moment of thought about their off-the-grid secret.

Neither was it like those serious times when they were silently communicating, such as when she sent him off on a dangerous mission and she looked at him with a veiled mixture of desperation and well wishes, urging him to be safe. And he in turn told her he would get back to her, no matter what. He'd promised not to be as reckless as he'd been when she first took command of Atlantis.

It was not the look she gave him across the desk in her office when he brought her intent or commands into question, nor the look she directed at him when he was being called in on the carpet for something reckless or thoughtless he'd done. They were equals in rank, but she was the senior officer and she had the last word.

This was what John felt now. Sam had the final word. That is what he saw in her eyes, in her posture, in her unspoken words.

Sam was in command now, and no matter how much John wanted to take her off somewhere secret and hug the life out of her, telling her it would be all right, she would just give him the look she was wearing now: detached, distanced, and in control.

"You should get down to the chair room and prepare for launch."

The look didn't change. No small smirk or glint of an eye for his comfort. John's stomach sank and churned uneasily.

"Right. I'll get to it then."

The pregnant silence that followed only underlined the lack of silly retorts or flippant quips on John's part. Sam had effectively deflated him.

He kept his eyes trained on Sam and tried to tell her that it was okay — that there would be time afterwards for this sort of thing — but Sam turned her back on him and returned to the operations console where she resumed her talk with Banks. It left John standing alone, gazing at her back and shifting on his feet.

When he noticed Chuck giving him a sort of sympathetic glance, he truly began to feel uncomfortable and quickly straightened his spine.

 _This is professional,_ John told himself.  _Nothing else. It's fine._

With a nod in the Canadian technician's direction and a final look at Sam, John turned on his heel and stalked towards the staircase and his orders.

* * *

  
**Next:** "This is war, Mr Coolidge."

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	4. Day 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the cat-and-mouse chase between the Wraith superhive and Atlantis continues, the IOA comes to Sam with a proposition.

****

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**THREE | "This is war, Mr Coolidge."**

_Prompt: a time for war  
_ Music: Johann Sebastian Bach, Double Violin Concerto in D minor (2nd movement, Largo Ma Non Tanto (BWV 1043)

* * *

**DAY 13**

"Shields at 27 %!"

Major Kevin Marks' report was almost muffled by the stressed beat of the red-throbbing klaxons. Colonel Steven Caldwell turned to face him only to abruptly shy away as a console along the wall burst into a fireworks of sparks.

"Hive ship's coming around," Marks continued, pushing buttons in controlled motions despite the stress of the moment. "Incoming fire!"

"Get us out of here," barked Caldwell, just as the ship rocked with the impact of heavy energy fire. He found himself slung back in the chair, his hands fisting around the tips of the arm rests. " _Now_."

"Hyperdrive's still offline, sir. We've only got sublight engines," said Major Emma Cooper loudly from her position on Caldwell's left.

Ever attentive, Marks responded almost immediately, "Engaging evasive manoeuvre Delta-2."

Avoiding a sudden burst of sparks from an overhead conduit, Caldwell cursed inwardly and pushed the intercom button to Engineering on his chair. "Doctor. We need those hyperdrive engines  _now_."

"— _we—eed ten mo— minutes, Colonel!"_  Doctor Lindsay Novak's disembodied voice flickered through the crackling speakers.

The ship rocked with another impact. One of the officers close to a sparking console went flying through the air and crashed into two other bridge personnel at the back of the room. Caldwell cursed again.

"You've got two minutes, Doctor!" He shut down the intercom before she managed to reply and turned to Marks. "Recall fighters, both hangars, and direct Asgard weapons at the Hive's engines. Give us some time to breathe." He then turned to Cooper. "Notify Atlantis of the circumstances. Tell them to prepare for attack. And get us the hell out of here as soon as that hyperdrive comes online."

"Yes, sir!" responded both Majors, already embroiled in their tasks.

Caldwell grimaced as the ship shook with enemy impact and turned his eyes on the Wraith Hive ship before them. Huge, menacing and nearly completely resistant to the Asgard plasma beam weapons, spitting out ZPM-powered energy weapons like hail.

It was Earth all over again.

* * *

"Colonel?"

Sam looked up from her work to find Chuck in the doorway, looking extremely uncomfortable. He shifted his glance halfway over his shoulder. Seeing the three head representatives of the IOA remnant standing not three feet behind him, she had to fight to suppress a heartfelt groan.

Chuck hesitated for a moment, then said unnecessarily, "Mr Coolidge, Mr Woolsey and Ms Xiaoyi wish to speak with you."

Sam smiled tightly at the technician and made a hand gesture. "Send them in, Chuck."

As the Canadian nodded in response and stepped out of the way so the three IOA representatives could enter, Sam rose to her feet and gestured to the comfy chairs opposite of her desk.

"Come in," she greeted them. "Please sit down."

"Thank you, Colonel," replied Richard Woolsey, seemingly the only one of the three who genuinely appreciated the gesture. He gave her an affirmative smile and quickly spoke up before his colleagues could say anything. "We appreciate you taking your time to accommodate us. We're aware that things have been…busy…lately."

Sam resisted the urge to raise an eyebrow and instead nodded. "Protecting this city from the Wraith ZPM-enhanced Hive ship is one of our top priorities right now."

"Of which you're doing a wonderful job," assured Woolsey.

Sam smiled tightly, not assured at all. While Woolsey had proved to be an upstanding guy and politician in the past, and someone worth having on their side, she could not say the same for the other two IOA members.

She leaned forward on her desk. "So, what can I do for you?"

Before Woolsey could continue, the Chinese representative to the IOA directed a calm but icy look at Sam. "Colonel Carter, the IOA is not happy with the situation here on Atlantis."

Sam stared back at her, nearly speechless. She took a deep breath and counted to ten before responding. "With all due respect, Ms Xiaoyi, I doubt _anyone_  is happy with the current situation."

"We recognise the severity of the circumstances—" began Coolidge, but Sam cut him off.

"Do you?" She gave him a hard look. "This is war, Mr Coolidge." The challenge was obvious and what little hair remained on Coolidge's head seemed to rise in objection.

Woolsey quickly raised his hands to quell any retort on his colleagues' part and gave her an imploring look. "Colonel. Things have not been easy since communication with Earth failed. You must understand that this is a trying time – for all of us. We're simply here to see what we can do to help."

Hearing the submissive tone of his voice, Sam forced herself to lean back in her chair, slowly uncurling her fists. She took a moment to think, then turned to Woolsey.

"What did you have in mind?"

If anything, Woolsey seemed to heave a sigh of momentary relief. He looked at his colleagues before replying. "As you know, there are more than two thousand people on this base, most of which are civilians and scientists. While our most pressing need is to protect ourselves from the Wraith, a lot of people feel run over by the military. They feel that their basic needs are either forgotten or not prioritised, and that their opinions regarding the decisions made on behalf of everyone on this base are ignored."

"Those decisions have kept everyone alive for the past two weeks," Sam said quickly, crossing her arms.

"Alive is not good enough," Coolidge butted in, earning him a curt nod from Xiaoyi and an almost dejected look from Woolsey. Sam tightened her arms against her chest. Coolidge pressed forward. "We're a democratic people, Colonel, and everyone in this city have the right to be heard regarding their own safety and future."

"With all due respect,  _sir_ ," Sam bit out, "we don't have the time to take matters up in a committee every time something happens."

"Colonel—"

Woolsey quickly spoke up before Coolidge could continue, obviously straining to keep the situation calm. "We're not speaking of the military decisions regarding the Wraith attacks, Colonel. We simply wish to have a civilian voice among the senior staff. You already have representatives from the different departments. Having a representative for the civilians on this base among them would only be logical."

Silence fell over them as Sam considered his reasoning. It  _was_  logical. Coolidge — loath as she was to admit it — was right in saying they were a democratic people. Ignoring the civilians on this base — people who had not wished to come here, but had been forced by the circumstances — was fundamentally wrong, even if Sam had little love lost for those butting in on military situations.

She let her elbows rest on her desk as she leaned forward, regarding all three of them. She especially paid attention to the other two IOA members as she finally met Woolsey's eyes.

"Okay," she said simply, and Woolsey lowered his shoulders, giving her a relieved smile. "Mr Woolsey, would you like the job?"

Even if they both remained silent, Coolidge's hair rose and Xiaoyi's lips thinned. Sam felt like she had won her first victory.

"I would," said Woolsey, seemingly paying no attention to his colleagues.

Sam was about to open her mouth, only to be cut off by a citywide klaxon. Seeing the technicians in the gate room fluster about, she jumped to her feet. The three IOA members rose as well, looking at each other and their surroundings, uncertainty in their features.

Sam turned to Coolidge and Xiaoyi. "I suggest you return to your quarters. Woolsey, you're with me."

She gestured for the man to follow and then strode off towards the operations centre.

As soon as she came close enough, Sam called out, "Report!"

Chuck looked up at her briefly. "We received a subspace message from the  _Daedalus_ , ma'am. The Wraith superhive is on the move. ETA fifteen minutes."

"Okay, you know the drill," Sam told the technicians. "Boost shields and prepare for stardrive. And get me the security teams on the radio."

Once Banks nodded at her, Sam tapped her earpiece radio. "This is Colonel Carter to all teams. All non-essential personnel and civilians must return to their quarters or designated safe locations. We launch in ten minutes." After receiving affirmatives from the team leaders, Sam touched her radio again. "Colonel Sheppard?"

" _I heard. I'm on my way to the chair room."_

Sam nodded. "Call me when you get there. Carter out."

She turned to Chuck, who spoke up before she could ask. "Shields are up. ZPM power levels at 97 %."

"City lock-down in progress," reported another technician.

Sam found herself leaning over one of the operations consoles, following the reports from security teams and department heads as they came in. It was all happening fast, but controlled. By now, it was routine.

Somehow, the Wraith superhive managed to find them less than three days since they last escaped its clutches. That totalled five times in the past two weeks. The last three times, it had found them even faster.

It was a puzzle Sam was struggling to figure out. Even combined with McKay and Zelenka's problem-solving skills, they were no closer to figuring it out, and they were running out of time.

_I'll have to call another meeting once we reach our next rendezvous point. It can't go on like this._

"Colonel Sheppard says he's ready," Chuck said, drawing Sam out of her thoughts.

For a moment, Sam was caught off guard – John usually gave her a call directly once he was ready – but then quickly donned her mask. "How's the lock-down going?"

"A few stragglers, but most of them have returned to their quarters," said Banks.

Sam nodded and touched her radio earpiece. "Colonel Sheppard, you've got the green light. Take us out."

" _Copy. Strap in, guys."_

Seconds later, the city was surrounded by the cloudy mist of stardrive.

* * *

  
**Next:** "I didn't vote for you!"

* * *


	5. Day 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enough is enough. Sam and the command team decides to make a stand against the Wraith superhive, but the costs of such a decision may be greater than they, especially Sam, anticipated.

* * *

**FOUR | "I didn't vote for you."**

_Prompt: a time to speak._

* * *

**DAY 21**

"You want to  _what?_ " Rodney's eyes were boggled. Sam gave him a pointed look and he quieted down. "But—but wouldn't that…?"

"It could work," said Zelenka, pushing his glasses up the ridge of his nose. "The electromagnetic interference of the nebula should make us undetectable on long-range scans, especially if we run on as little power as—"

"Yes, yes, yes," Rodney brushed him off, grimacing. "We know all that. Any other time and it might work perfectly, except we've got a Wraith superhive with the sensor range of Atlantis on our tails just waiting to crush us like little bugs on a—"

"Rodney."

"What?" He turned sharply to Sam. "You haven't noticed the red lights blinking and klaxons hammering through your head every six hours? Not to mention the wonderful jolting around the last time when the Wraith managed to fire off a volley on us before we jumped to hyperspace. We're just lucky to have three ZedPMs boosting our shields!"

"Rodney, we don't have time for this.  _Focus_." Sam glared at him. The Canadian scientist moaned, sinking down in his chair. Satisfied, Sam continued. "Now what does the database say about the nebula in this system?"

"This isn't Star Trek, you know," muttered Rodney. Sam poked him in the arm, earning her a yelp. Grumbling, he settled down in front of the computer and drew up the Ancient database. "Fortunately for you, this might actually work to some degree, but not in the long run. They'll find us again."

"Not before we've had a decent break and can start thinking fresh," said Sam.

"That is until the Wraith show up with their ZPM-enhanced weaponry and siphon all the power out of our shields," said Zelenka unhelpfully.

Both Rodney and Sam gave him a pointed look this time. When he only looked at them with a 'what?' expression, they sighed simultaneously. Rodney continued to input data into the computer.

"Here," he said after a while, pulling up a photo and a translated text. " _Ortus Monachus:_ the 'Rising Monks' nebula. Hey, don't look at me. I didn't name it."

"The Ancients definitely had a way with names," said Zelenka, staring at the screen.

Sam rolled her eyes and leaned down to read the information about the nebula. According to the Ancients, the nebula was made up of ionised hydrogen and helium gases, as well as plasma: all remnants of a supernova explosion that occurred approximately 18,000 years ago. There also seemed to be leftover naquadah matter from a nearby planetary explosion during the supernova formation.

"It's beautiful," Sam said, looking at the picture. Blue, purple, green and yellow colours mixed in the light from the system's star. Clouds of dust formed shapes that might actually resemble the name the Ancients had given, although it seemed more like a Rorschach test than anything concrete. Sam could see rabbits leaping over stones.

"And deadly," said Rodney pointedly, raising his eyebrow at her. "If anything should ignite that nebula, we'd be fried in a matter of seconds."

Sam didn't reply to that, instead straightening and looking at each of her top scientists. "It's risky, but it's worth it. We need time. This is the best chance we've had in a long time."

Rodney nodded reluctantly. "As long as we refrain from sparking an explosion. However, we should have an escape route ready for when the Wraith  _do_  show up."

"Goes without saying," said Sam, nodding. "Also, we don't know how the shields will hold up against the radiation, so even with a full complement of ZPMs, we should conserve energy any way we can. Shut down any unnecessary systems, but see if you can boost our long-range sensors somehow. It'd be nice if the nebula didn't have quite the same effect on us as it would on the Wraith."

"You're the boss," said Rodney, already typing away on his PC tablet.

Sam looked at the two of them, both with their eyes glued to a computer screen, and smiled. "Let me know when we're ready to take her into the nebula. I'll be in my office."

* * *

"Where's Colonel Carter?"

John looked up from the framed photo of SG-1 clutched in his hands and saw Caldwell in the doorway, tall and rank with his arms at his sides. He pushed down the immediate sense of having been caught with one hand in the cookie jar and broke eye contact by looking at his watch.

"I assume she's in her quarters getting some shuteye. That's  _if_  she followed my suggestion." Caldwell's bland stare made John a bit uncomfortable, so he pressed on. "Anyway,  _I'm_  here. Anything I can do for you?" He put the photo self-consciously back in its allotted place next to the PC tablet, then slipped his feet down from where they'd rested on the edge of Sam's desk.

Caldwell appraised him for a moment, following his movements, then broke from his position and entered the office, though he remained standing, arms crossed. "What's our latest update on the Wraith superhive?"

Shaking off the uneasy feeling in his gut, John said, "Still sitting right where we left 'em. No movement for the past seven hours. It would seem our plan's working."

"So far," said Caldwell. His features showed anything but optimism in the executed plan. "How long does McKay think we can keep this up without getting our asses blown up by the nebula?"

"Technically, it would require an ignition to set off an explosion," said John matter-of-factly, earning him a raised eyebrow. He amended, "But we should be able to hold it up as long as necessary."

"Which could be a very long time," said Caldwell brusquely. "Restricted power use and MREs are killers for morale in the city. I've already heard several reports about almost-outbreaks of fistfights; soon, we might have a riot on our hands. And I wouldn't put it past Todd's people to work out a new way to detect us. We're sitting ducks in here."

"Look," said John, leaning forward on the desk, his voice clearly annoyed. "It's risky and reckless, yes, but we've been left alone for seven hours straight. That's one hour more than we usually get. I'd say that counts for something."

Caldwell, however, didn't look convinced. "It's not good enough."

Angered, John jumped to his feet, fisting his hands at his sides. "Hell, I know it's not good enough, but what do you want us to do? That ship's been hounding and pounding us for the past three weeks, and all we've been able to do is disable it for a moment so we could run off. Trust me, I wanna take it back on them as much as you do, but I'm _not_  gonna risk the lives of the people in this city!"

The two men stared at each other. John's knuckles whitened. Caldwell's chest puffed out as his dark eyes glinted.

"What's going on?"

Sam's voice came like a bucket of ice-cold water dumped on his mind, but John found it hard breaking eye contact with the senior Colonel. Only when she prodded with a crisp "Colonels?" did they react.

Turning towards her, John immediately noticed that Sam looked as bleak and worn as when he'd first suggested —  _ordered_  — her to get some shuteye. Despite the dangerous glint in her eyes, it was obvious that she hadn't gone to sleep after all. It was starting to worry him immensely.

Sam raised her eyebrows expectantly at him, arms crossed tightly across her chest. Whatever John had wanted to say, he couldn't get it past his lips. Disappointment and annoyance coursed through him, and he cursed inwardly.

"Colonel, I think we should consider our other options regarding the superhive," said Caldwell, taking John's silence as cue to take over the situation.

As Caldwell spoke, John looked down at the photo he'd clutched so tightly less than ten minutes ago. The grinning faces of a past and present SG-1 team were really starting to annoy him. Since Christmas, he'd seen Sam view it with such softness in her eyes that he often felt like an intruder and let her be when he actually wanted to talk to her.

John regretted that now. Somewhere in the past three weeks, she'd stopped to view him the same way.

He only listened to the conversation unfolding between Caldwell and Sam with half a mind.

"What other options?" Sam's voice was clearly bristled. This'd been her plan. She wouldn't let it go without a fight. "We've tried everything we could think of. At least now we've had a chance to breathe."

"How about a chance to _think_?" Caldwell asked, equally relentless. "We're sitting ducks here. Once the Wraith figures out our location, the superhive will be here in seconds, guns blazing, and we can't do  _anything_  to stop it from destroying Atlantis."

John saw Sam's lips thinned and anger welled in him. He stepped around the desk, fists clenched.

"Cut her some slack, Caldwell," he said, almost growling. "We get it: you're not happy. Neither are we. We're all sick and tired of this cat-and-mouse chase. We just want that superhive to turn his nose and leave us the hell alone, but guess what? We're not that lucky. Deal with it."

"I  _am_  trying to deal with it, Sheppard," Caldwell said, taking a step towards him. His tone was low and menacing. "Unlike you, I'm thinking about the long-term survival of the people on this base, and  _I'm_  willing to make some sacrifices to achieve that."

"Listen here, you—!"

" _Stop_. Both of you." Sam stepped between them, her eyes blazing and giving life to the otherwise pale and drawn face. "We're not getting anywhere standing here bickering like this."

A tense and awkward silence fell over them.

Sam took a deep breath and then looked at John with that particular look he'd grown to hate recently. There was nothing remotely comforting about it, even if her voice was controlled and soft as she said his name.

"John," she said. "Would you please find McKay and bring him to the conference room? I don't care if you have to drag him out of bed as long as he's in that room in twenty minutes."

His jaw clenched and his hands fisted, but as before, John found the words stuck in his throat. Next to Sam, Caldwell shifted on his feet, his eyes settled challengingly on John. It seemed clear whom Sam was going to listen to.

Slowly, John stepped away from the desk, his eyes on Sam, whose blasted look he was now starting to  _loathe_  with all his heart.

He felt like he was back in the operations centre three weeks earlier, chided and put down by his commanding officer. But Sam wasn't only his CO. They'd been equals, using each other as sounding boards for whatever ideas and suggestions the other came up with.

At least that's how it'd been until she started shutting him out and refused to share the burden, instead running herself ragged and ignoring her declining health and John's suggestions to either get enough sleep, food or just a moment to relax. Far too many times lately, he'd gone to bed only to find it empty, and when he finally tracked down Sam, she often brushed him off and insisted that she had something  _really_ important to do. At those times he often wondered if he should just give up, but the few times she still listened to him and returned to bed with him…he told himself to keep at it.

Yet now, after all he'd done, Caldwell was the one standing next to Sam while John was reduced to errand boy.

"Sure." John's voice and smile were anything but pleasant. "… Colonels."

Twisting around abruptly, John stalked towards the door and waved his hand angrily over the controls. For the first time in a  _very_  long time, he felt like disobeying an order.

* * *

"You want to blow up a nuke inside the nebula?" asked Woolsey in disbelief. "Why?"

"It's insane, but it could actually work," said Rodney, comprehending the plan immediately, while most of the other staff looked confused. Somehow, he seemed to glean more excitement from this than the few hours of sleep he'd gotten before the meeting. "With the highly explosive gases inside the nebula, the explosion would be enormous. As long as the Wraith don't jump out before detonation, you could do some serious damage."

"Which is why we'll have to keep the Wraith occupied until the nuke has been launched," said Sam.

"And how do you plan to do that?"

John's voice was quiet. He met Sam's eyes, his shoulders slightly slumped, and he was fiddling with his thumbs. Shaking off the uneasy feeling from John's stare, Sam entwined her hands and leaned forward across the conference table. She broke eye contact with John to look around at everyone around the table.

"The  _Daedalus_. We use its beaming technology to insert the nuke inside the nebula, then detonate it remotely."

"Sorry, I'm still not following you," said Woolsey, rubbing his brow. " _Why_  is this such a good idea?"

Before Sam could answer, Caldwell butted in from the seat next to her. "It'll give the nuke ten times more explosive power, which should inflict some serious damage on the Wraith superhive when it shows up."

" _When_  it shows up…?" Woolsey turned to Sam, his face grim. "I thought you said we were safe from detection inside this nebula."

Sam pushed back a sigh and squared her shoulders. "The electromagnetic interference from the nebula is making it harder for the Wraith to detect us, but based on the last three weeks, it's a very good chance they will find us again. We  _have_  to be prepared."

She glanced at John, trying to gauge his thoughts on the matter. She was unnerved, not by the stony expression on his face, but by the dark piercing look he suddenly directed at her. There was nothing familiar about it and Sam withdrew her eyes uneasily, trying to fight off the feeling that something was very wrong and she didn't know what.

"Besides," said Rodney and turned towards the IOA representative, "this nebula has given us the best fighting chance we've had in a long time. Of course, it could all blow up in our butts and then we won't have to worry about being chased around by the Wraith like—"

"Rodney," said Sam sharply. Woolsey looked more alarmed than before.

"What?" Rodney said defensively. "I'm sure even a mind like yours has considered that Atlantis's manoeuvrability — though not very good to begin with — is severely limited inside this nebula. Not to mention that it's impossible to use the stardrive unless we clear it."

" _Daedalus_  will run interference and keep the Wraith at bay," said Caldwell before Sam had a chance to reply. She met his eyes, startled. "That should give you enough time to clear the nebula and jump to the next rendezvous point before the nuke is detonated."

"What about  _Daedalus?_ " asked John, his tone pointed and almost defiant. "Your shields are no match for the superhive, and in here you're as limited in moving as Atlantis is."

"We're still faster and more agile than the Wraith," said Caldwell, straightening in his chair. "We'll get the job done and Atlantis will be safe."

"Will it?" asked John challengingly, his dark eyes glinting. On top of the conference table, his hands were clenched to the point where his knuckles whitened.

Woolsey looked even more alarmed.

"Stop it," Sam snapped brusquely. She was rattled by the intense look the two male Colonels both wore and remembered the incident she'd stumbled upon in her office earlier. She wouldn't have a repeat. "We're all on the same side here."

Caldwell and John said nothing, but they slowly broke eye contact. Still, Sam felt her neck tense and a headache coming on. It was not over, not by a long shot.

Taking a deep breath, she continued with a tone of finality. "Like Rodney said, this is the best fighting chance we've had in a long time. Igniting the nebula should deliver a crippling blow that's too fast for the superhive's enhanced regenerative hull to handle." She looked at everyone in turn, from Woolsey to Caldwell, trying to regain some control of the situation.

Rodney was fiddling with his PC tablet, looking a bit like a deer caught in the headlights, his eyes skirting between John and Caldwell. Woolsey seemed deeply unsettled, but tried to hide it behind his lawyer's mask as he met her eyes. Caldwell simply stared back at her stonily, and John...

John didn't meet her eyes. His hands were clasped tightly, knuckles white, and his jaw was set. Sam recognised restrained fury when she saw it and her stomach twisted uncomfortably with the knowledge that she had no idea what was going on, only that if he got the opportunity, he would go to the gym and unleash his anger on Ronon, and  _this_  time, he would probably not drop by her quarters afterwards.

_You can't think about this now. You can't. You just..._

Sam closed her eyes and took another deep breath, before looking up and gaining everyone's attention. "Crippling, destroying or dissuading the Wraith superhive from following us, is worth the risk. We can't keep this chase up forever. Our power levels keep dropping severely in each armed encounter with the superhive, and will continue to do so until we're completely depleted. Not to mention that we're already rationing whatever supplies we have and it won't last much longer."

She paused. "There're more than a thousand people on board this city ship. We're obliged to keep them alive, but we're also obliged to keep them safe. I say this plan is our best shot at doing that."

No one said anything for a moment and then they simply nodded, except for John, who had his head down.

"I'll head back to  _Daedalus_  and start the preparations," said Caldwell, rising to his feet. "McKay, let me know when you've got the nuke prepped and ready."

"Y-yes." Rodney hesitated, glancing once more at John, who suddenly got to his feet and stalked out of the conference room without another word.

Sam watched him go with trepidation and unrest, ignoring the wavering look Rodney gave her before he exited as well. Caldwell gave her an affirming nod before leaving, and then there was only Woolsey and Sam left.

The IOA representative approached her slowly and Sam had a feeling she already knew what he was going to say. Frankly, she'd just been waiting for it the whole meeting.

"I feel I should warn you," Woolsey said quietly, "that the other IOA representatives will probably not be as confident in this plan as you are."

Sam sighed, pinching the ridge of her nose. She could feel her headache coming on more strongly. "Tell me something I don't already know."

Woolsey hesitated, then continued in a low voice, "For what it's worth, I stand behind you one hundred percent. I'll argue your case." Sam looked up at him, surprised. He gave her a ghost of a smile. "Like you said, it's our best shot. And we have the best people from Earth behind it."

"Thank you," Sam said honestly, giving him a brief smile.

Woolsey just nodded, and then left the room, leaving Sam standing by the conference table and pondering all that'd happened.

* * *

Sam didn't felt too terrific about ordering her obviously dead-on-their-feet scientists to secure Atlantis for battle, but it was her job. They needed to do this as quickly as possible. Despite Rodney's minor enhancement of the long-range sensors, the nebula was a cause for interference and sometimes they couldn't read any sensor data at all. They had no idea when the superhive would move.

She didn't feel completely comfortable with their plan, but it was the only option besides continuing the chase they'd been on for the past three weeks, and that would eventually lead to a massive burnout for both the people on board Atlantis, as well as the city itself. Besides, she had to remember that best-case scenario would be that the Wraith superhive was destroyed. Worst-case scenario, the superhive escaped unscathed.

Leaning back in her chair, Sam took a moment to close her eyes and rub them tiredly. She sighed, knowing she was only one of many who were feeling the effects of the chase, of being constantly on guard, of having barely hours to rest between each jump. She could now understand some of the hardships that must have fallen on Ronon in his Runner years. Always knowing your enemy was behind you and could somehow locate you, like a glaring beacon on a map, was a constant mental toll.

"You okay?"

Sam opened her eyes and found Daniel standing in the doorway. One of his arms had been cast and put in a sling. Bruises still marred his face and neck, and when he walked it was with a limp.

She smiled bleakly. "They let you out of the infirmary, huh? Sure that's a wise thing? There are lots of places to take a tumble down around here."

"Ha-ha," smiled Daniel, scoffing. "I'm sure there is. They all probably have my name on it."

He limped inside her office and settled down in one of the comfy chairs opposite her desk. Sam rose to help him, but he waved her off, even though he groaned in pain as he sat down.

Watching him, Sam couldn't help thinking about Earth and her throat was suddenly very thick and itchy. She swallowed, withdrawing her gaze until Daniel addressed her again.

"So… You didn't answer my question."

Despite the obvious pain he was in, Daniel managed to look concerned, something that hit Sam harder than seeing him in yet another hospital bed, fighting for his life while the world around them twisted and turned. She looked elsewhere, crossing her arms defensively as she took a deep breath. Her eyes swept past the picture of SG-1 beside her PC tablet, causing her to hesitate for a moment before responding.

"I'm okay," she said eventually. "There's been a lot to do. Still is, as a matter of fact. Never a slow day, huh?" She tried to smile, but she felt it came out all wrong and too tight. Daniel only looked at her. "I'm okay,  _really_. How're  _you_  doing? Are all your bones in the right place?"

"Heh, I'm okay. Nothing that hasn't happened before. I'm already back on my feet, see? It only took three weeks." Daniel smiled and Sam couldn't help but return it, even as her heart broke once more at the remembrance of that dreaded day when everything had changed.

They drifted off into silence, each contemplating something that wasn't spoken. For Sam's part, she was thinking about when she first arrived to the gate room after receiving a rather confusing and stressed message from one of the technicians.

At first, she'd been overwhelmed by seeing all the Earth evacuees being escorted to other locations simply because the crowd was too big for the room. People were moving everywhere, frightened, unsure, and angry. Equipment was being shoved through the gate and crashed into people and other supply crates.

It'd been complete chaos.

Demanding an explanation had proved difficult because no one would listen. The IOA members that'd come through had then discovered her and begun to hound her with questions to which she didn't know the answers. Everywhere, people were shouting or crying out names, bumping into each other with what little they had been able to bring with them. The Marines tried to keep control without much success, holding their weapons up to ward off the flow of people and direct them away from the stargate.

And then Daniel had been rushed through the gate in a medical bed, badly injured, and Sam finally realised something bad was happening to the SGC. It was one of the worst, most desperate feelings she'd ever had in her life. If John hadn't found her at that moment and helped take control...

"Have you talked to him yet? Apologised?" Daniel's question brought Sam away from memory lane and back to her office, where she was now trying to avoid the uneasy feeling welling up in her. She glanced at her friend, who wore an indiscernible look. He was one of the few who'd figured out what John meant to her.

Guiltily, Sam stared down at her entwined hands.

"Sam..."

"He's avoiding me."

"Can you blame him? You've been kind of distant lately."

"He said that?" Sam looked up in surprise.

Daniel sighed. " _He_  didn't need to. You know how people talk when they think you're just a patient sleeping in a hospital bed. I've heard them say you're throwing yourself into everything with gusto. Sound familiar? Keller's not happy with you, by the way, and you shouldn't argue with people with big needles."

He paused, a sad look splayed across his face. Sam could only imagine he was thinking about another female doctor that'd once threatened them with big scary needles. Looking up at her again, Daniel added meaningfully, "Besides, I  _know_  you, Sam. I know how involved you can get. Remember when Jack was stuck on Edora?"

Sam met his eyes, unable to smile. "Do you think I've ruined it?"

Daniel hesitated. "No. But I wouldn't advise you to continue shutting him out. That would give the wrong message, unless  _that_ ' _s_  the message you want to—"

"No!" said Sam quickly, embarrassed. "I don't want to... I mean... God, why is this so hard? It should be simple, like science."

This made Daniel chuckle, even as it turned into a wince when the bruised skin pulled tight in his face. "Only you would compare a relationship to science," he said, amused. "Just—just talk to the guy, Sam."

"That easy, huh? Never seemed so to me." Sam sighed heavily, running a hand across her tired eyes. "There's just never a good time. And with the Wraith just around the corner... I dunno. He's pretty angry."

"All the more reason you should talk to him," said Daniel.

Sam gave him a ghost of a smile. "Is this why you broke out of the infirmary?"

"Who said anything about breaking out?" countered Daniel, smiling. "Keller thought I could manage on my own now, as long as I stay clear of any exploding equipment and broken staircases. Just in time, mind you. I was bored to death down there."

"Then you've come to the right place." Sam sighed, leaning back in her chair, arms hanging at her sides. "Never a boring day around here."

At that precise moment, the citywide klaxons started beating through her eardrums, proving her point.

* * *

When Sam received the message from  _Daedalus_ that their transporters had been disabled, she knew the ship would never be able to get them back online before the Wraith superhive destroyed it. With Atlantis already clearing the outskirts of the nebula – thanks to the few precious moments of warning Rodney had given them by enhancing the sensors – the Earth battle cruiser was very much on its own.

Sam knew she had to think and act fast. She touched her earpiece radio, heart racing. "Carter to Sheppard, come in."

" _I'm kinda busy trying to save an Ancient city from a big-ass superhive at the moment,"_  was John's terse response, but Sam had no patience for whatever bitterness he seemed to hold.

"Turn around and get us back in there," she ordered sharply. "We're gonna provide cover for  _Daedalus_ while they get their transporters back online _."_

" _Are you out of your goddamn mind? Atlantis can't handle the superhive on its own; it's not Battlestar Galactica!"_

Sam spoke as if she hadn't heard him, already leaning over the nearest console to execute her plan, the gate technician nearby making room for her.  _"_ Prepare to launch drones and energy weapons as you see fit. I'll try to boost our shields further. That should buy us more time."

John didn't respond, but Sam was too busy to think about it at the moment. She sat down in front of a PC tablet, pulling up the needed program.

Woolsey and Rodney both approached her, incredulity and shock on their faces. They spoke at the same time, while the rest of the technicians looked on with uncertainty, halted in their actions by Sam's decision.

"You want to take them head on? It's insane! We should—"

"Colonel, Atlantis is not a battleship—"

"—our shields will be depleted in—"

"—got a thousand people on this city!—"

"—we should haul ourselves out of here as quick as we—"

"We're  _not_  leaving  _Daedalus_ behind!" Sam halted them both with a piercing look. Before they could start blabbering again, Sam turned to Banks with an authoritative stare. "Shut down all non-essential systems. I need as much power as you can give me if these shields are going to hold."

Hesitating for a split second, with a skirting look between Sam and the two men who had just objected, Banks slowly responded with a nod before setting to work.

Satisfied, Sam then turned her head briefly to the technician seated behind them. "Chuck, give me Colonel Caldwell."

The Canadian hesitated only a second before touching a few buttons and nodding to her. Sam touched her radio. "Colonel, don't back out just yet. We're coming back for you."

Caldwell's voice filtered through her ear.  _"What? Are you crazy? Get yourselves out of here!"_

Sam ignored him, typing away furiously at the PC tablet in front of her, pulling up programs and inputting new codes and variables. "I'm pulling all we've got to our shields right now. We'll be able to hold them off for a few minutes. You've got that time to get your transporters back online and launch the Mark IX, then we're out of here."

Before the man could reply, Sam had shut off the link and pushed a button to contact John down in the chair room. "Colonel Sheppard, get us between  _Daedalus_  and the Wraith superhive. As soon as they've launched the nuke, I want you to get us out of here as quickly as you can and jump to the next rendezvous site."

John didn't reply immediately and his voice sounded odd once he did.  _"Roger that."_

With no screens to show where Atlantis was headed except data on the consoles and computers, the people in the operations centre had almost no idea what was going on until the city was rocking with the impact of Wraith ZPM-enhanced energy weapons.

"Shields are holding, but power levels have dropped to 82 %." Rodney, having given up trying to reason with Sam, had settled down by another console and was pushing buttons speedily along with his verbal report. Between the two of them, they'd find a way to stave the Wraith off for a moment. "ZPM pressure is rising rapidly."

Finishing with her shield adjustment algorithms, Sam jumped to her feet and went over to watch over Rodney's shoulder. "Estimated time for overload?"

Just then, the earthquake-like waves of weapons impacts culminated in a nearby console bursting into sparks. One of the technicians yelped in pain and slumped to the floor.

Rodney looked on in horror for a second until Sam jolted him out of his shock with a shake and a clipped, "McKay!"

Opening and closing his mouth several times, Rodney turned back to his computer screen and swallowed. "At the current strain, we'll lose shields in five minutes, that's unless the shield emitters fry out first."

Sam ducked her head with a grimace as more sparks burst from somewhere overhead. She clung on to the console with both hands.

The lights flickered, covering the room in fleeting, pervasive shadows. People who hadn't been sitting by consoles were now stumbling everywhere, holding on to whatever they could grip when the enhanced Wraith energy weapons impacted. Woolsey clutched the railing of the balcony overlooking the gate room, eyes wide and trying to meet Sam's, who was too immersed in Rodney's computer screen to notice.

Gritting her teeth together as she held on to Rodney's console during the impacts, Sam raised her voice to overpower the buzzing noise. "Get in touch with Zelenka. Tell him to keep the ZPMs from overloading by rerouting power from the naquadah generators. That should buy us some more time."

Rodney didn't argue, touching his radio and shouting in the background as Sam moved to check on the downed technician, who was moaning in pain. One of the female technicians was leaning over him, dressing his wounds with bandages from the operations centre's first aid kit.

"He'll be alright, ma'am," she said loudly, wincing at the impacts and sparks alike. "First and second-degree burns, but nothing serious!"

Sam nodded and moved on; holding on to consoles and chairs alike as the room suddenly and abruptly shook from the weapons impacts. She looked at Chuck. "How is  _Daedalus_  holding up?"

"They're nearly there. A few more minutes," he said and promptly ducked his head as a sparking conduit was flung from overhead and ended up dangling three feet away from his left ear.

Sam touched her radio headpiece to contact John again, but was thrown off her feet when the room suddenly tilted at a forty-five degree angle. Grasping for balance, she found nothing but air and crashed on the ground, hard, banging her head on something solid and sharp.

Dazed, she struggled to push herself up or grasp for support as she slowly slid down the tilted floor, blinking her eyes rapidly to clear away the appearing black spots. The room tilted back to a more horizontal position and Sam got shakily to her feet, calling out randomly, "Report!"

Rodney was the one to shout back, scrambling back into his seat from the floor. "The Wraith managed to punch through the shields!"

"Damage?" Sam asked, still blinking and shaking her head to clear away the haziness. The sounds seemed wrapped outside a bubble, but a rising high-pitched tone was ringing in her ears.

"We can't tell," said Banks, her voice strained. "A lot of the systems have been shut down. We've only got propulsion, communications and life-support."

"ZPM power levels are reaching critical!" Rodney's voice was filled with barely-controlled panic.

Leaning heavily against a console, Sam finally cleared her vision enough to meet Rodney's wide-eyed, apprehensive look. The same thought ran through their minds.

Steeling herself, Sam turned to Chuck and opened her mouth to order a retreat—

" _Atlantis, this is_ Daedalus," Caldwell's voice said on the crackling speakers. _"The nuke's been launched. Now get the hell out of here!"_

* * *

The cost of Atlantis' and  _Daedalus'_  escape were 12 fatalities, 40 casualties, countless fried consoles and conduits, heavy structural damage to one of the city piers as well as the battle cruiser's hull, faulty shield emitters, and several Mark II naquadah generators.

To avoid complete power failure in space, Atlantis had been forced to land on a nearby planet that they only vaguely knew supported life. The ocean was nothing compared to the previous planets the city had been situated on, but at least the air was clean, if not a bit thin. Anything else, they would have to work out as they went along.

Immediately after landing, they'd been forced to shut down all three ZPMs to avoid a catastrophic overload, and were now running on an assortment of Mark II and Mark III naquadah generators on the most important operating systems. Anything else was offline for the time being until repairs had been made.

What made everyone on edge was the lack of a shield or even a cloak. With no long-range sensors, and  _Daedalus_  being grounded for repairs, they had no way of completely knowing what'd happened to the Wraith superhive after they jumped to hyperspace.  _Daedalus_  had just barely escaped in time, and initial reports said the Wraith had shown no signs of being fast enough to escape the blast.

No one managed to relax, even after finally leaving space to settle on a new planet.

Since Atlantis had jumped to the rendezvous point, Sam had walked around the city half-dazed, but mostly on edge. A constant headache from the blow she'd taken during the attack was her closest companion, keeping her from nodding off. Keller had offered painkillers, but Sam was wary of the supply stock and the many others who needed it more than she did.

12 fatalities, 40 casualties; Sam had trouble swallowing this truth.

Apparently, so had James Coolidge, ever the most outspoken of the three top remaining IOA representatives. Just a few hours earlier, he'd stalked into the mess hall, which had been serving as a triage centre, with Shen Xiaoyi and several people Sam didn't quite know on his heels.

" _Colonel Carter!" he snapped angrily. "Do you know how many lives were lost in this god-awful crusade of yours today?" He waved his hands dangerously, eyes wild and fixed upon Sam._

_He drew a lot of attention. Those both tended to and waiting for medical help were staring, some half-forgetting why they were in triage in the first place. Sam, however, was even less impressed with the man than the last time he'd barged into a room and demanded her attention. In fact, she felt herself bristle as she saw the blatant ignorance on his part in regards to the wounded people he and his gang was stomping through to get to her._

" _Mr Coolidge, this is not the time, nor place—"_

" _You've got that right, Colonel. This is absolute the worst possible time to come up with crazy plans that turns Atlantis into a giant, fried-out mess — not to mention that it gets people killed — just to satisfy your need for recognition!" He halted in front of her, hands at his sides._

" _My need for recognition?" repeated Sam incredulously, feeling the anger spiking inside her._

_Recalling everything she'd ever been taught about self-control, she found she was balancing on the edge of blowing up in the man's face, which was probably just what he wanted. However, she needed to get her opinions off her chest and, nearby, Keller was puffing herself up to come over and tell them to calm down. Sam decided to save the doctor the trouble._

_"Mr Coolidge," she gritted out pointedly, grasping for control. "Let's take this outside. We're in the way for doctor Keller."_

" _No, Colonel, it's about time you tell these people the truth," Coolidge said, tugging his arms close to his chest and planting his feet firmly onto the ground. To his side, Xiaoyi looked as cold and icy as ever._

_Sam swallowed her immediate reply and instead straightened, taking full advantage of her height compared to the two IOA representatives and their goons._

_"The truth?" she asked. "With all due respect, sir, I've told them nothing but the truth. The_  Daedalus _was unable to complete the mission on its own and Atlantis was the only possible back-up. We went in and we got out."_

" _And you're aware 12 people died in this foolish plan of yours?"_

_Sam almost snorted. The whole situation seemed very surreal. She looked around the mess hall, meeting a few gazes from the wounded and their caregivers. Some didn't look impressed either._

_"I'm very aware of the consequences, Mr Coolidge," Sam said._

_The man's face reddened, but before he could burst out into another tirade, Xiaoyi stepped forward. "Then maybe you could explain to us, Colonel Carter, why you went against the advice of Mr Woolsey, your top scientist Doctor McKay, and even your own second-in-command, Colonel Sheppard?"_

_That rendered Sam speechless. Staring at the IOA entourage, standing among the wounded like a block of impenetrable naquadah wearing nearly impeccable suits, she struggled to regain her composure. Eventually, she had to force the sudden thoughts and revelations in her head back so she could focus on the present._

_Locking her jaw and pulling up to her full height, Sam crossed her arms and said in a very low, definite tone of voice,_  " _Last time I checked,_   _I was the commander of this base. You should know that; the IOA were the ones who signed the paperwork."_

_Both Coolidge and Xiaoyi stared back at Sam's equally unrelenting eyes. Then Coolidge took another step forward, his eyes still wild but more controlled. He nearly barred his teeth._

" _Yet,_   ** _I_** _didn't vote for you."_

_The statement, heartfelt and sudden, pierced Sam like needles of ice._

_So that was what it all boiled down to. This wasn't about how many people had been killed or how much damage the city had sustained. Like always, this was about power._

_Coolidge gave her a cold stare. "I never wanted you on this base, Colonel. You military people are reckless and wherever you go or whatever you do, a lot of innocent people die."_

" _Obviously, Colonel Carter," said Xiaoyi, her eyes glinting like ice, "we made a mistake in giving command of Atlantis back to the military."_

" _That may be," Sam said slowly, feeling like a Mark II naquadah generator — in a state of barely controlled overload. "But you did, and General O'Neill put me in charge. Let me remind you that despite the fact that we sustained fatalities and damage to the city,_ Daedalus _can confirm detonation of the nebula before they jumped, and that the Wraith superhive was still inside. I'd say escaping the Wraith for good, whether we destroyed the superhive permanently or only managed to inflict heavy damage, justifies my decisions."_

_Xiaoyi stared at her, lips thin, eyes cold. "You would be wise to remember, Colonel, that the end does not always justify the means."_

Things had ended abruptly then, by Coolidge, Xiaoyi and their goons making their exit with looks of warning and contempt and just sheer superiority issues. Keller, as well as a few of the other people, had patted Sam on the back or given her a small smile, but many had looked at her in a way that'd made her extremely uncomfortable and self-conscious. She'd stayed in the triage room only thirty minutes more, feeling like she was under close scrutiny, before she finally caved in and left.

Now standing on the balcony outside the operations centre, watching the horizon where high mountains soared into the dusky sky across the sea, Sam didn't know what to do or feel. Everything had happened so fast and they were still awaiting final, definite confirmation of the nebula explosion to quell any remaining uncertainties. As soon as  _Daedalus_  was finished with the basic necessary repairs, they would go back and only then would Sam be able to relax.

Until then, she reminded herself that she was the commander of this city, this base, and she was responsible for more than a thousand people on board Atlantis. Major General O'Neill, who'd risked his career to return her to command of Atlantis seven months ago, had entrusted her to them. Their safety – and the classified files he'd sent her upon the loss of Earth – was her main concern. She didn't have time for anything else.

She couldn't  _think_  about anything else.

However, looking to the spot next to her, once frequently occupied by John with his smiles and his humorous quips about everything and nothing, Sam found it was difficult  _not_  to think about something else.

It was lonely at the top  _—_ she'd always known that  _—_ but Sam felt it even more keenly when it was also becoming lonely in her bed.

* * *

  
**Next:** "I guess this is it, Colonel."

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A note about Mark III naquadah generators being used in this AU's Atlantis: They haven't introduced this generator in the canon series, but I figure that in the three years since the Mark II entered (SGA: season 2), they'd probably managed to upgrade it further. The Mark II are simply leftover generators that were never sent back to Earth for upgrade.


	6. Day 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally fed up with the wedge that has been forced between them both professionally and personally, John confronts Sam.
> 
> Edited July 2015.

 

* * *

**FIVE | "I guess this is it, Colonel."**

_Prompt: a time to lose  
Music: "Journey to the Line" from 'The Thin Red Line' soundtrack by Hans Zimmer_

* * *

**DAY 26**

Immediately following the short service, Sam stepped silently away from the crowd and left the small grassy field to enter the seclusion of the forest. Probably returning to the city, since she touched her earpiece radio and seemed to listen intently.

John noticed this as he stood by the row of twelve freshly dug graves, each headed by stones or crosses depending on what the deceased would've wanted. On some, dog tags were present, bringing him uncomfortable recollections of some of the wars he had been part of, like Afghanistan or Bosnia, and of those they'd buried during their first year in Atlantis before  _Daedalus_  or the stargate could be used to transport the bodies home. To Earth.

Twelve dead. Three military. Nine civilians, of which three had been scientists. Eight Earthborns. Four Pegasus natives. John couldn't help but do a mental tally as he looked over each of the graves, having spent most of the service staring into the empty air.

His hands fisted in the pockets of his BDU pants.

It was too early to leave. People still clung to each other around the graves, crying, mourning and in all kinds of despair. They needed more than a short eulogy. They needed a strong presence with them, a comforting hand upon their shoulders, and some soft-spoken, earnest words of condolences. They needed her to see they were real people, alive and hurting, and not a damaged city.

_The Old Sam would've known that. The Old Sam would've told whatever hard-ass was on her case that "screw the city; it can wait." But not this one… I don't even know who—_

John gritted his teeth angrily, an action that didn't go unnoticed by the person standing next to him.

"John." Gently, Teyla touched his arm, her voice lowered so as to escape any eavesdroppers. "Are you all right?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," he muttered, burrowing his hands further into his pockets, unable to meet her eyes for fear that she'd see straight through him; she had that ability. Instead, he stared back down at the twelve mounds of upturned earth, some already obscured by bouquets of fragile native flowers. "It's just a waste. These people shouldn't have died. They weren't even involved in the fighting."

Teyla touched his arm again, squeezing lightly. The strength of her fingers reminded him that she'd lost one of her people as well, three graves down. John was ashamed to admit that he hadn't recognised the name. He felt annoyance flush through him at that and an urge to shrug off her hand. He didn't deserve her consolation.

"I am sure there was nothing you could have done, John," said Teyla quietly. "The Wraith…well…"

She drifted off and left it unsaid, but John knew what she had in mind. The damn life-sucking aliens had been stronger than them this time. It was another thing that bothered the hell out of him and made his fists clench tighter.

Then Teyla said in a brighter tone, "At least we do not need to run anymore. We are safe here."

"That depends on how you look at it."

The low, bitter words escaped past his lips before he could register them. Teyla's hand tightened in response and when John looked up at her, he noticed her look of warning. Nearby, a group of people passed them on their way back to the Jumper landing zone and John tensed.

_Leadership 101: when morale is low, don't make it plummet._

Angry with himself for losing control like that, John turned and strode away, stopping by the last grave in the row. It was one of those carrying a dog tag. Shifting restlessly on his feet, he tried to place the name to a face, forcing his mind onto other things. It was a slow process, however, made worse by the fact that there'd been an influx of new faces after Earth.

Another fact that pissed him off so much at times that he wanted to crack his knuckles upon Atlantis' walls. It shouldn't have happened, yet it did, and the broken pieces after Earth's loss seemed impossible to fix.

John's narrowed eyes skirted in the direction Sam had gone, the uncomfortable tightness spreading in the pit of his gut familiar by now.

Then Teyla crossed his field of vision and John returned to stare back down at the grave in front of him, cursing himself for once more losing focus. The guy in the grave didn't deserve that. None of the dead did, not when his actions had put them there.

John's fists clenched again, though this time painfully.

"Do you not believe we are safe here, John?" Coming to a halt next to him, Teyla lowered her voice once more, sounding cautious.

Regretting his previous words, John tried to amend them. "Probably for now, but you know the Wraith. They don't give up once they've caught our scent. Sooner or later…" He let the thought linger, intermingling with memories from the past five years.

"But I thought…" Teyla paused and he saw her eyebrows furrow. "Sam told me earlier today that they've figured out how the Wraith were able to track Atlantis. She also said that they knew how to prevent them from finding us again."

 _That_ was news to John and he felt his blood flare up to an instant boil as he rounded on Teyla, glaring at her. " _Sam_ told you that? When?" When she didn't immediately respond, he locked his jaw and turned his glare to the forest obstructing the view of Atlantis on the horizon. "Funny how _I_  didn't get that memo."

John gritted his teeth in renewed frustration, no longer seeing the grave in front of him or the people around him. Instead, he saw only flashes of all his interactions with Sam over the past few days, wondering when the hell she'd learned this vital piece of information and then decided to keep it from him. Did Caldwell know? Did  _everyone_ except him?

"I'm sorry, John."

Teyla's voice was lined with a sad tone that seemed to acknowledge some deeper understanding of the situation, and as the full impact of her words registered, old instinct and discipline screamed at him to get the hell out of Dodge…except he couldn't.

The grave below him was still without a face and there were still stragglers milling about the area, mourning. Someone had to look after them. Someone had to pick up the pieces, even if some of those pieces were—

John fisted his hands until it hurt, nails almost breaking skin, the pain bringing him down to earth from his close to panic-induced state. He looked back at Teyla, who was looking at him with even greater sympathy, and something tugged at the pit of his gut.

For weeks now, he'd reined it in, but…what was the point anymore? Everything had changed. Clearly  _he_  wasn't important anymore.

And so the words passed like a breath of wind from his lips: "Yeah… Me too."

It felt like defeat and relief at the same time. For a fleeting moment, a weight had been lifted off his chest, but when Teyla squeezed his arm, John felt suddenly disgusted with himself and returned to stare intently at the grave below him.

"I'm sure she meant to tell you, John," Teyla said eventually, clearly playing the diplomat. "Much has happened."

John scoffed derisively. "Yeah, and she's just been too busy running around the city and trying to take care of everything herself."

In the corner of his eye, he could see Teyla stare at him intently. "It sounds to me like she is looking after us, like a leader."

"Or trying to," John grumbled beneath his breath.

Teyla paused for several beats, before stepping closer and asking quietly, "Do you no longer believe Colonel Carter is capable of doing her job?"

John couldn't respond to that. After the latest battle with the Wraith, a part of him was screaming 'yes' and another was crying 'no', and he found himself trying to ignore both.

Teyla knew his unspoken answer, however, and gripped his arm. "John…"

Her quiet and empathetic demeanour made him shift on his feet, feeling yet again the sudden impulse to leave. You didn't criticise your CO outside the chain of command and he was starting to feel like a bitter turncoat. In the presence of those around him, people under his command, he felt it even more keenly, especially since he now recalled the face lying under earth and stone beneath him: Captain Ruchenkov of the late SG-17. Engineer. Not assigned to any security team during the battle. He'd been off-duty.

The sudden recognition startled him, and John's insides became a mixture of ice and fire as his jaw tightened painfully. Ruchenkov shouldn't have died, but he did. Because when it came down to it, Colonel Carter had ordered John to take Atlantis back into the nebula and she was his CO. That was the cold, hard truth.

And John hated it. Hated everything it represented. Hated everything it made him feel.

Teyla stopped him when John took a sudden, angry step back, and her brown, concerned eyes appraised him. "I am sure the decisions Colonel Carter made were necessary considering the circumstances. She probably felt the deaths of each of these twelve people as keenly as you and I." She paused and then added, "That is what a good leader does, John."

Rationally, he knew that she saw through his façade, and she was trying to remind him that he was still a leader, that he still had a responsibility to the people around him. Staring back into Teyla's brown eyes, however, John felt the blood that'd simmered over the past few weeks now rush up into his head like a volcano ready to erupt.

He stepped closer, eyes intense and teeth clenched. "But good leaders also know when they've crossed a line."

A horrible, sinking feeling of shame and agony lodged in his stomach at the words he was about to hiss below his breath.

"She hasn't."

* * *

With a heavy feeling in her body, Sam watched as two of the multi-coloured zero point modules were disconnected and retrieved from the power console. She refrained from yawning like an obviously tired Rodney was doing next to her, and instead straightened her slumping back.

"Let me see if I got this right," said Woolsey, standing on Sam's other side. "The Wraith are able to track us because of the ZPMs? How?"

"Through an incredibly complex procedure that would take way too long for me to explain," Rodney said crankily. Sam rolled her eyes.

"The gist of it, though," Sam said, looking sideways at Woolsey, "is that we believe the Wraith have come up with a kind of subspace radar."

Woolsey looked blank, a phenomena Sam was now well used to after her years at Stargate Command and Atlantis both. She took a deep breath, pushing off the wall she'd been leaning on.

"Conventional sensors, both Wraith and otherwise, work two ways: active or passive. The active sensor works by sending out 'pings' through both regular space and subspace that bounce off objects and are then sent back with a profile of the objects. That way they can continually keep track of what's out there. The passive sensor, however, is kept on all the time, but it's not actively sending out 'pings' to track the objects in space. Instead, it simply picks up whatever energy source comes its way."

"I'm with you so far," said Woolsey. "I think." He gave her a small smile. Sam returned it before continuing.

"Now, we know normal Wraith hive ships have a limited range on their sensors," she explained. "Even though they can detect objects through subspace, their long-range sensors are not the best."

"That's if you compare it to Atlantis, who has been able to detect the Wraith through subspace sensors when they're three weeks out," said Rodney in an almost lazy drawl. He met her eyes. "What?"

"I was getting to that, McKay," said Sam a little grumpily. On the other side of the power console, Zelenka paused to glance at them, then continued with his extraction and packing of the Ancient power modules.

"Well, I can't help it if you insist on making a lecture out of it. God knows we've had enough of those," said Rodney, clearly annoyed. He looked at Zelenka with narrowed eyes. "Can't you speed that up? We're missing lunch."

Sam rolled her eyes, ignoring the jab at turning the 'lecture' comment back on him, and turned firmly towards Woolsey again as Zelenka and Rodney bantered in the background.

"The point is," said Sam, "that Atlantis used to have superior long-range sensors. Unless the Wraith were told our exact coordinates, they couldn't find us."

"Then the ZPM-powered hive ship turned the tables," supplied Woolsey carefully.

"Yes." Sam nodded. In the background, Rodney and Zelenka both snapped their mouths shut after some Czech swearing on the latter's part. "Their enhanced sensors were able to track us through subspace. At first, we didn't know why they kept finding us and why it took less and less time, but now we have a better idea."

"The ZedPMs," interjected Rodney mournfully. "Three fully powered ZedPMs working in tandem provided the Wraith superhive with a glaring beacon in subspace they could easily track. You see, the power signal of three zero-point-modules is unique. No one else in the Pegasus galaxy, at least that we know of, can give off that amount of power signal. We might as well have painted a red circle on our butts and let the Wraith use us for target practice."

"Essentially," Sam told Woolsey, resisting the urge to jab her elbow into the Canadian scientist, "we have to shut down two of our zero-point-modules in order to stay invisible on the Wraith superhive's sensors."

Woolsey frowned. "Why two?"

"Because we believe that is the minimum amount of what the Wraith ship is carrying, and we are able to track it using the same parameters on our long-range subspace sensors as they have for the past three weeks on us. That's how we discovered the most likely reason they were able to follow us in the first place."

"By looking for their ZPM power signal?" Woolsey's look of confusion was replaced by a dawning expression of realisation.

"ZedPM subspace signal, actually," said Rodney pointedly. At Sam's glare, he added, "Just to be clear."

Woolsey sighed deeply and Sam didn't begrudge him. The loss of two ZPMs was horrible when three were available, especially considering that one alone wouldn't help Atlantis stand a chance against the superhive.

Zelenka finished packing up the Ancient power sources and handed one case to Sam, keeping the last for himself. He gazed at the sole connected ZPM with a mournful look.

Sam left the room first, followed closely by Woolsey, with Rodney and Zelenka making up the rear, talking lowly amongst themselves regarding the case in the latter's arms.

"How much power will remain?" Woolsey asked as they went down the corridor towards the nearest transporter.

"We still have the last ZPM, which has the highest power levels, several leftover Mark II naquadah generators, as well as the Mark III generators Earth sent us a month ago," said Sam. She tried to muster enough energy to sound optimistic. It was hard. "Still, as a precaution, I'm afraid we'll be back to rationing power and reducing exploration of the city like before."

Woolsey frowned. "What of the other ZPMs? Will you merely leave them in storage?"

"We can't run the risk of losing them," Sam said matter-of-factly, tightening her grip on the case. "Once we resume gate activity, we'll have a lot of people coming and going. ZPMs are rare and valuable."

"If I may say so, that sounds like paranoia," said Woolsey, looking at her sideways as they strode forward.

"With all due respect," said Sam a little firmly, her tiredness easing a little with renewed annoyance. "Atlantis doesn't exactly hold a perfect track record when it comes to internal security. Even with armed guards, we still have too many unknown variables aboard this city. Not to mention that, at the moment, we're at our weakest level of alertness. We've overextended our resources, people are getting restless, and the Wraith superhive — despite sustaining heavy damage in the nebula — is still out there, looking for us. For now, I believe we need to tighten our ranks and do everything we can so the Wraith doesn't find us again."

A yawning Rodney added from behind, "Besides, one of the ZedPMs will go to  _Daedalus_. With it, the ship should be able to withstand a great deal more if it should encounter the superhive again."

Sam nodded and gestured to the black case in her hand. "This one will be kept here in a secure location for emergencies. The location will be classified and revealed on a need-to-know basis."

"Does that include the IOA?" asked Woolsey carefully and Sam's neck tensed.

Despite her tiredness, Sam could recall clearly when Coolidge had barged into the triage centre in the mess hall five days earlier, accusing her of craving recognition —  _of all things_  — at the expense of Atlantis and its inhabitants. The incident had set some serious thoughts grilling in her head, but she had yet to come up with any concrete plans as to how to deal with the IOA representatives. Between organising the service today and repairs and supplies, she simply had no time left for it.

However, at this point, she had no love lost for either Coolidge or Xiaoyi. And for the time being, Woolsey was under her personal scrutiny as well. He was proving to be a stand-up guy that was handy when it came to politics, but she was as of yet still unsure exactly which camp he held with.

So, as they approached the transport, her answer was simply, "Need-to-know, Mr Woolsey. Let's keep it like that for now."

* * *

"—this isn't over!"

John jumped out of the way as James Coolidge stormed out of Sam's office, soon followed by a much calmer but icier Shen Xiaoyi. The Chinese woman nodded curtly in John's direction, but otherwise said nothing as she passed him.

His eyes narrowed as he watched the two of them disappear around a corner. Their presence never boded well and judging by their exit, something huge had just taken place inside Sam's office.

Looking back through the open doorway, John saw Sam leaning heavily on her elbows behind her desk, sighing deeply and rubbing her eyes. For a moment, that part of his heart that he couldn't ignore reached out to her obviously tired look, but then her irritated eyes found his and John's sense of good will disappeared, renewing the frustration that'd stayed with him all day. He steeled himself.

He entered, despite Sam saying, "This isn't a good time, John."

"We need to talk," said John brusquely, moving to close the blinds as the door shut automatically behind him. "And we're gonna do it now, before you run off to solve the world's problems again."

Sam gritted her teeth and hid her head in her hands. "I'm not in the mood for this."

"Good, 'cause I'm not either." John closed the final blind and turned towards her, his arms crossed, his feet shifting back and forth uneasily. "Now, we're gonna talk and then we're gonna fix this."

"Fix  _what?_  In case you didn't notice, I've got a whole city to fix, not to mention trying to keep myself from kicking Coolidge's ass to a place far, far away!"

"I mean  _us_!" hissed John, jolting forward, his hands fisting. "Geez, Sam, did you really forget or did you choose to forget that we're supposed to have a relationship?"

Sam's jaw clenched, her fingers entwined to the point where her knuckles whitened. "That's unfair."

"Unfair?" repeated John in disbelief, his stomach churning irritably. "You know what's unfair? Shutting me out for the past few weeks like I'm nothing more than your 2IC, and even that you've been rubbish at! I had to hear from  _Teyla_ about the ZPMs."

Sam flinched at that, but clearly decided to overlook the last jab as she narrowed her eyes at him. "I'm shutting  _you_  out? You've been avoiding me."

"Can you really blame me?" John began to pace angrily back and forth in front of her desk. He forced himself to lower his voice lest the gate technicians on the other side of the door managed to hear him. The rest was spoken through barely gritted teeth. "I've tried to do the right thing. Tried to keep whatever it is we have alive, to stick close by, to understand, but you haven't exactly made me feel like I'm welcomed."

"I  _do_  want you around," Sam said, leaning forward in her chair as if to bridge some of the distance between them, but was stopped by her desk and looked almost comical when she realised that. She cleared her throat. "But we both agreed that Atlantis comes first."

John almost scoffed, shaking his head at her audacity. "Yeah, I agreed because I thought we could handle it. It's pretty obvious that we  _haven't_." He gestured to the gap between them as if to underline his point.

Sam's eyes narrowed, her voice angry as she gritted out, "And you're gonna blame it all on  _me_?"

John couldn't help the urge to point accusingly at her as he took a step forward. " _You've_  been the one running around the city like a Duracell Bunny, thinking you have to either do everything yourself or tell everyone personally what to do! Whatever happened to delegation? Whatever happened to  _trust_?"

That made Sam jump out of her chair. "Are you mad because  _I'm doing my job_?" She leaned on her fists on top of the desk, eyes glinting. "I've got a responsibility to this city and its people, John! I can't just ignore them!"

"But you can ignore  _me_?" John came to a halt right in front of her desk, his height making him tower above her so she had to crane her neck slightly. Blood pounded in his ears. "Think I don't understand how FUBAR things are right now? Think I don't want to run off to wreak havoc on those damn crazy-ass aliens for what they did to Earth? Or blow the shit out of the Wraith?"

Panting slightly, John paused, flicking his eyes to the SG-1 picture facing away from him on Sam's desk. "Think I don't know what it's like to lose people, Sam?"

It struck a cord, like he knew it would. A wet, clear shine entered Sam's eyes and she blinked furiously, looking close to tears. For a fleeting moment, his hope rose.

Then it all came crashing down when Sam's expression hardened once more, deleting any trace of the Old Sam for whom he'd decided to risk it all a couple of months back before shit hit the fan.

Teeth gritted, John continued, "You've holed yourself up in this damn office and burnt the candle at both ends ever since we lost touch with Earth, and I've tried to understand that, but… _god damn it_ , Sam, we're supposed to be  _a team_." His eyes narrowed dangerously as he finally uttered the nagging thought that'd been plaguing him ever since she first started pushing him away. "If you didn't want that anymore, you could've just had the decency to say so instead of just ignoring me."

Silence fell over the room as their eyes met. Not the comfortable silence of intimacy as they cuddled together late at night or early morning, feeling full of adventurous mischief and daredevilry. Nor the professional silence of command as they considered some proposition brought forth by one of their subordinates or allies and then silently agreed which course of action to take.

This was a deadly and contemptuous silence John had only known once before and had hoped never to relive. Even as Sam pulled up to her full height, arms crossed tightly, he knew what was coming.

"Do you want to call it quits?"

Her voice was steady and blunt. Her eyes were hard, her chin up, and John found himself straightening his back and locking his jaw, meeting hard with hard.

"At least then I know what to expect," John said sharply.

Their rigid, heated eyes probed for weak spots in the other's defence. There was none. Sam's face was now completely closed off, the hint of tears gone, and John felt like her true mask was finally settling in place. She couldn't let go of command, not even for him.

Sam's lips thinned and her arms tightened beneath her chest. "Then I guess this is it... _Colonel._ "

"Fine," John gritted out. " _Colonel._ "

Then, blood still pounding in his ears, he left.

In his wake, Sam slowly unfroze from her immobile position and sank down heavily into her chair. Drawing her rapidly blinking eyes from the closing doorway, she saw the numerous new e-mails waiting in her inbox, some marked with red exclamation marks for 'greatest importance'.

Sparing a wavering glance at the now closed door, her eyes anything but hard, Sam then picked up her tablet pen and set to work.

* * *

 

**Next:** "We don't want you here."

* * *


	7. Day 42

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As John takes his expanded team on a mission to establish trade between the Bhaati people and Atlantis, back in the city, Sam finds herself facing an ultimatum that might have long-lasting repercussions.

* * *

**SIX | "We don't want you here."**

_Prompt: a time to hate._

* * *

**DAY 42**

It was a cold night. The seas were calm, glittering like ice in the pale moonlight. Far above the towers and lightening rods of Atlantis, stars blinked out of the darkness.

Daniel always felt small in the presence of the stars. There were so many of them and, in silent moments like this, he always found himself contemplating a now familiar question: What secrets did they hold, these tiny yet larger than life phenomena?

Before he'd joined the stargate program, before Abydos, before the long years of SG-1, he'd dreamt of wonderful adventures, of secrets and treasures. He put that down to the influence of his parents' professions. Both the Egyptians and humankind had studied the stars. To him, that'd always been a cause for great wonder and curiosity, and it'd driven him towards his future.

Daniel couldn't help but wonder if he'd known then what he knew now, would he still have gone through the stargate the first time? Despite everything he'd been through, what his friends had been through, and what eventually Earth had been through, the answer was still yes. That familiar ground was comforting to him. Especially now, as he withdrew his gaze from his position on one of the South Pier balconies and sighed heavily.

Not every night was as clear as this, and from the balcony outside his quarters he could see things he rather wished he didn't.

Below, along the edge of the pier, the silhouette of Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard ran faster and faster towards the end of the flat platform, only to stop suddenly and run back to repeat the process. For the past months or so, Sheppard always ran at this time of night. Alone. He was like clockwork.

The sight always made Daniel sigh. He thought he knew what kept John up every night, and why he drove himself harder than anyone else during the daytime and wouldn't stop doing so anytime soon.

_Sam._

The woman in question was probably in her office right now, also alone, pushing her body to the limit of destructive exhaustion. These days she rarely, if ever, let herself be bullied into five consecutive hours of sleep. It made Daniel sad to see how she clung to her birds and computer tablet beyond the decent hours of the night, refusing any offers of comfort or company. Always working. Never taking a break to just sit down and  _breathe._

Daniel sighed again, knowing all too well how military life could ruin most of the humanity in people, and this'd certainly happened now. Losing people under your command was hard for most officers. Daniel had seen that with Jack, but at least Jack had – albeit grudgingly – accepted his company. Lately, Sam had begun to push him away. Logically, he attributed it to grief and could understand that he just needed to be patient, but the continual dismissal  _was_  starting to grate on him.

He just wanted to see her smile.

Before Earth happened, she'd been so happy. Since Sam took over command of Atlantis two years ago, she'd seemed much more at ease with her career, with her friends and family…and with whatever had once been between her and Jack. It was only two months before the evacuation, when he'd been to visit Atlantis and became entangled in the Attero device affair, that Daniel attributed the change to Sam's 2IC.

At the time, he'd thought they were only very good friends and Sam admitted as much, but during their e-mail correspondence later, Daniel understood that something else had happened. Something neither John nor Sam could talk about openly.

Daniel couldn't claim to understand it, since he hadn't been around to see the progress, but judging by their reactions from falling out two weeks ago…it must've been serious.

For some reason, he still found it odd that Sam had obviously taken a risk she'd never dared before. It made him question whether he could really say he knew her anymore. She'd changed. Then again, with Earth gone…they all had.

Daniel looked up at the stars again, sighing once more when he saw grey wisps of clouds drift ominously across the sky. Sam was his friend. He'd stand by her, no matter what. He just wished 'no matter what' could be easier done than it was said.

When he woke up in the Atlantis infirmary a month prior and heard the news about Earth, he'd thought long and hard about the road ahead. Aside from the fact of nature that time could be a harsh mistress, life had a way of throwing them off-balance when they least expected it, and sometimes it was hard to recover.

Losing Earth had unbalanced everyone. It'd been a devastating blow, but the continued threat of the Wraith superhive didn't help to ease the process of getting past that physical and emotional pain. In the past month, Daniel had seen many who seemed stuck in that same spot. Like a continuous time loop they couldn't escape.

They were still picking up the pieces of Earth's loss. Tomorrow, Daniel would do his part for the salvage operation. It was the one thing Sam still wanted him to do because of his years of experience and diplomatic skills, but his confidence was wavering. After all, he'd never had any particular positive experiences with the IOA and, lately, he'd had a nagging feeling that something wicked was coming.

* * *

"Now remember, we're on a  _trade mission_. We come in peace, so keep your weapons low and  _try_  to look friendly."

Sheppard, eyes dark but steady, gave each of them a look as they walked along the wide path, but stopped in particular when he came to the Canadian scientist. When a deadly silence fell over the group following Sheppard's last words, Dr McKay drew his eyes up from the life signs scanner in his hands.

"What?" McKay's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "Why're you all looking at me? I'm friendly. I can do friendly. See?"

The scientist put on what Captain Reese Matthews was sure he meant was his friendliest face, but to her it didn't look anything like it. Not exactly what she'd expected, given the rumours about him. Then again, she didn't exactly know what she  _was_  expecting. This was all a bit sudden to her.

At six in the morning, Sheppard had banged down her door and told her to haul ass to the briefing room in half an hour. When she got there, she'd been surprised to see both AR-1 and Reese's own – recently established – team. But there'd been no time for questions as they sat down for a thirty-minute briefing with Colonel Carter about the imminent trade mission. Apparently, it had to be done so early due to planetary differences in daylight hours and their mission was an important one. Most of the mission details had barely fastened in Reese's mind at this hour, but what'd stuck was the importance of acquiring a stable trading partner and she could understand that. Chewing ration packs had grown old long ago.

"Maybe you should just let Teyla turn up her charm, Rodney. Save yours for your special someone," said Sheppard with a slight roll of his eyes. The affronted scientist stuttered, trying to come up with some sort of comeback, but Sheppard pressed on, looking over his shoulder at the rest of the team. "Keep your eyes peeled for anything out of the ordinary. We don't want any  _incidents_  this time."

The last was addressed to the soldiers of the team, Reese's team making up the rear and the big Satedan guy on point.

Reese nodded solemnly, holding her P90 just an inch closer. It'd been a while since she'd been out in the field – all the way back in the Milky Way – and the gathering forest around her already put her on edge, reminding her that she was on unknown territory, in an unknown galaxy, dealing with unknown characters. The treetops were tightening the gaps and less light escaped to the thick undergrowth. If she hadn't seen the brilliant daylight in the distance ahead, she would've almost thought it was close to dusk.

The people they were going to negotiate trade relations with was apparently an old trading partner of Atlantis, but they'd pulled back from that agreement at the height of the Wraith-Asuran war about a year ago. Now, Colonel Carter hoped they could renew the old arrangement, so they could say a final goodbye to rationing. Though how the Colonel was going to sort out fresh food for more than two thousand people, Reese had no idea. Atlantis had recently started sending out Jumpers for fishing, as well as cooperating with Pegasus hunters to collect game and fruits from the mainland, but it wouldn't be nearly enough for such an amount of people in the long run. Even combined with the previously established trading partners, she doubted this village alone could provide them with the still lacking resources. They would need at least six or eight more trading partners, depending on their capacity for export.

"Matthews."

Reese pulled herself out of her thoughts and looked to Sheppard, who'd pulled back a little. She noticed his finger resting along the bottom of his P90 and tried to remain frosty. She hadn't forgotten the silent tension in the meeting earlier: the almost cold, ignoring looks on the faces of her commanding officers. Still, he seemed a tad more relaxed in this setting, so she forced herself to remain calm.

"Yes, sir?"

Shifting his eyes between their surroundings and her, Sheppard said, "When we get to the town I want you, Ramirez and Sanders to keep an eye on our exit. Let me know if the natives get restless."

Trying to refrain from gripping her weapon tighter, Reese focused on the spot of sunlight growing larger in the distance. "Do you suspect trouble, sir?"

"It never hurts to be prepared," he said matter-of-factly. "We didn't exactly leave the Bhaati on pleasant terms last time around. Some might not be that happy to see us."

Sheppard turned his head suddenly, but seemed to quickly deduce it was nothing and took two strides to keep in step with her. Reese looked in the same direction but saw nothing but trees and bushes and shadows. No movement apart from them.

Frowning, she asked, "I thought Colonel Carter said the Bhaati were the ones to initiate contact this time and that they insisted on re-establishing trade? That should give them some credit."

If she'd been any less on guard, she mightn't have noticed the twitch in Sheppard's finger or the sudden hard look in his eyes at the mention of their commanding officer.

"They did and it does," said Sheppard tonelessly, but Reese felt there was more to it; something the Lieutenant Colonel couldn't admit, something that was better left unspoken.

The daylight in the distance became clearer and the forest brightened up as they neared the end of it. Sheppard held his weapon closer to his chest, but with the muzzle low.

"Just keep our exit clear, Captain," he said. "Don't let anyone push you around, but don't pick any fights either, alright?"

"Yes, sir."

Reese stared after him as Sheppard picked up his pace. Glancing over her shoulder, she looked back at the spot to where Sheppard had paid extra attention. Still nothing. There were only insects and the low buzz of birds and humans in the distance.

So why did her finger itch so close to the trigger?

* * *

"This latest attack on Earth personnel by Pegasus natives clearly underlines my point, Colonel! Your feeble security measures have no effect. If this keeps up, I'm sure Dr Keller and her staff will be quite burnt-out by the end of the week!"

Coolidge's nostrils flared, making a very tempting target for Sam's very restless clenched fist. Given that he was on the opposite side of the conference table, however, made it difficult for her to actually do any harm to him.

Teeth gritted, Sam leaned forward, entwining her hands tightly on top of the table. "I am  _not_  sending them back to their planet only to be fed upon and killed by the Wraith. Besides, I have it on good authority that the natives were not the ones to initiate the fight. That they were, in fact, provoked."

"And when has verbal provocation exonerated killers and criminals?"

"Colonel Carter," said Xiaoyi before Sam could butt in, her lips thin and eyes cold. As always, she kept her voice controlled but low. "Aside from security issues, even you know that we cannot sustain so many people on board this city any longer. It will eventually drain all of our resources."

"Exactly," said Coolidge, spitting the words out with a grimace. "We need to start thinking about  _ourselves_ , Colonel. We're cut off from Earth, we have no secondary line of supply, and there is a big Wraith cruiser out there waiting  _to kill us all_!"

"A ZPM-powered hive ship, actually," said Daniel, his voice clinging to an ounce of diplomacy Sam found otherwise lacking in this room. His eyes narrowed as he met both Coolidge's and Xiaoyi's stares. "Which is beside the point, because if we send these people back to their planets they'll probably be captured by the Wraith and questioned about our whereabouts."

Coolidge twirled abruptly on his heel and gestured widely with his hands. "Then we fly off to another planet, preferably one that has higher oxygen levels and more varied resource base."

" _We can't do that!_ " Sam nearly slammed her fist into the table. "Besides the fact that taking off with a single ZPM will take a heavy toll on its power reserves, the moment we reconnect a second ZPM we'll be like a shining beacon in subspace, leading the Wraith superhive straight to our new planet." She glared at the two IOA members on the other side of the table. "Whether you like it or not, we—stay—here _."_

"Then I suggest you do something more effectively to stop these fights between Pegasus refugees and Earth personnel, Colonel." Xiaoyi pulled back in her seat, her elbows resting on the arms of the chair. She truly was an Ice Queen. "Clearly, a few security points in such a large city as Atlantis are not enough. Perhaps you should consider speeding up the relocation."

Sam closed her eyes, fisted her hands until her knuckles whitened, and counted to ten. The throb in her head from lack of sleep had worsened by far since this meeting began. It was becoming a daily – and quite an excruciating – occurrence. One she'd rather be without. There were other issues on her schedule that warranted more of her time than the two IOA representatives seated on the other side of the table. But judging by their increasing number of visits, neither was about to leave her alone any time soon.

Sam took a deep breath and gathered whatever shred of control she had left. "As I said before, we're going as fast as we can. The mainland is neither suited nor capable of sustaining a large amount of people at this time. The Athosians and Treegan have created settlements, but that is as far as we've come at this point. In the meantime, the other tribes will remain here."

"It's not good enough," said Coolidge at once. He gave her a narrowed look, leaning forward on the table as he lowered his voice. "Colonel, I'm sure you agree that we cannot allow more Earth personnel to be injured in petty fights. Seeing as Atlantis has been an Earth base from the start, it's the refugees that  _have_  to go."

Sam bristled, almost rising out of her chair. "We promised them protection from the Wraith; I  _won't_  change that now _._ "

" _Military_  protection, yes," hissed Coolidge, nostrils flaring, spit flying. "But did you also promise them an eternal supply of food, water, housing, precious medicine? Did you promise them that they could take a hit at our people in return for our protection? They don't appear very graciously  _thankful_  for your  _protection_ , Colonel!"

Now Sam jumped to her feet, teeth gritted in instinctive response to keep her from yelling. "God!Are you really so xenophobic that you can't spare a shred of charity to someone who's lost everything, Coolidge?"

Red-faced, Coolidge rose to his feet angrily, beady eyes wide and frantic. " _We've_  lost  _everything!_ "

Breathing heavily, the American IOA representative glared at Sam, who found herself unable to respond, jaw clenched to the point of a headache exploding below her temples. The atmosphere was heavy, tense, and neither side was relenting.

Finally, Xiaoyi rose to her feet, quickly followed by Daniel who stepped closer to Sam's side.

"Perhaps we should adjourn for the day," Xiaoyi said icily, touching her colleague's shoulder. Coolidge shrugged it off angrily and turned on his heel with a last glare at Sam, then stomped out of the conference room with Xiaoyi behind him.

Sam, never losing eye contact with the two IOA representatives, set her jaw more tightly until the doors closed and it was only her and Daniel left in the room. Daniel let out a long breath, raising his eyebrows briefly.

"That could've gone better," he said unhelpfully.

Sam sank down in her chair. Leaning on her elbows, she closed her eyes and began to massage her throbbing temples. Coolidge's last words tumbled uncomfortably around in her head.

* * *

"How much longer d'you think it'll take?" Airman Trevor Sanders asked half-teasingly, half-seriously, as he looked across his shoulder at her from beneath his black cap.

Sanders was sitting on a log by the dirt-trodden road, seemingly bored. Close to the corner of a Bhaati house where he had both cover and line of sight, Sergeant Miguel Ramirez only grinned, chewing gum open-mouthed as he glanced around at their surroundings.

"My answer five minutes ago hasn't changed, Sanders," grumbled Reese, her finger itching to close in on the trigger of her P90.

One hour with the same constant questioning from the former SG-21 member and Reese was going stir crazy. Not to mention that the continued looks they were sent from passing Bhaati natives – some frightened, some curious, some contemptuous – were beginning to nag on her nerves despite Sheppard's warning about friendliness earlier.

Pushing off the wall of the Bhaati house she'd leaned against, Reese took a few restless steps across the dirt road leading into the town square. It was bustling with activity. People in drab colours moved amongst stalls and small shops, while vendors called out their prices and wares for both the interested and disinterested. The town was larger than Reese had expected and it reminded her of the Medieval-like towns she'd seen back in the Milky Way. Judging by the goods of the market square, she could understand why Atlantis would want them as trading partners; her mouth watered at the sight and smells that came on the wind.

Still, there was something off about this place. None of the town people had approached them after Sheppard and the others met and left with the leading town council member for the negotiations. Not even the curious children, who Reese had found was normally eager to engage with them. Sheppard had said some wouldn't be that happy to see them, but even the children? Was the Wraith that much worse than the Goa'uld? Were things  _that_  different between the Milky Way and Pegasus galaxies?

It seemed that wherever she looked these days, she only saw scared and distrustful faces. No happiness, no trust; only tension.

"Hey Cap'n," said Ramirez lowly, drawing her attention. He straightened and nodded towards a corner of the town square ahead of them, his eyes focused and slightly narrowed. It immediately put her on edge.

Heart skipping a beat, Reese turned casually so she could glance at whatever Ramirez had spotted. She found it, or rather him. A man was leaning against the side of a blacksmith's house, arms crossed, seemingly casual except for the dark, piercing look he sent their way. She met his eyes and felt a shiver go down her spine when he held the stare in challenge.

Then someone crossed the line of sight and the spell was broken. When Reese looked back, the man was gone.

Sanders rose slowly to his feet, his face much more vigilant and serious now. He stepped closer to her, as Reese eased her grip on her weapon.

"That's the third guy, isn't it?" Sanders' voice was low, sober, focused.

Reese nodded, keeping quiet as she surveyed the rest of the area, looking for any other suspicious activities. Finding none put her even more on edge.

Stepping away from any eavesdroppers, Reese tapped the  _on_  button of her earpiece radio. "Matthews to Sheppard."

It took a few moments, then the low voice of the Lieutenant Colonel crackled through the slight interference. Obviously they were inside somewhere with bad reception.

_"Sheppard here. What's your sitrep?"_

"We had another eye on us, sir." Reese paused, biting her lip. She lowered her voice even further, turning her face away from the square and her fellow soldiers. "Despite what you said, sir, I don't like this. It's starting to look less and less random."

" _Stay frosty, Captain. It doesn't look like we'll be able to move out anytime soon. Amid wants us to stay the night, but I've told him no. We should get out of here later today."_  He paused, exchanging a few words to someone off the radio, then continued. _"Just keep our exit clear, and don't upset the natives. We need them on our side. Sheppard out."_

Reese tapped the radio button in confirmation and then let out a frustrated breath. Needing the natives on their side was all and well, but she didn't like this at all _._  She had to stay frosty, though, like the Lieutenant Colonel said. Pulling herself together, she turned determinedly to her team members, who looked at her in varying degrees of apprehension. Neither of them seemed comfortable in this setting either.

"Keep on the lookout, but stay cool. We're not leaving yet," said Reese firmly, resuming her position along the wall of the closest Bhaati house. She held her P90 close in readiness, but not too tightly. She hoped that'd be enough. The last thing she needed was edgy, trigger-happy Marines.

Ramirez only shrugged, continuing to chew his gum where he leaned against the opposite house from Reese, while Sanders sighed lightly and sat down on the log once more, twisting his cap so it properly shielded his eyes from the sun. They didn't fool her, though. They were on edge, alert, but thankfully controlling it.

"I wonder what they want," said Sanders in a musing tone. "We're getting supplies and food, obviously, but what do they want? There's not a whole lot we can offer anymore, is it?"

"I'm sure the Colonel's got a plan," said Reese, though she couldn't help but wonder the same.

With Earth gone…

Realising that  _that_  path would only intensify the uncomfortable feeling in her gut, Reese channelled the suddenly dark mood into some good-natured ribbing on the Marine's part. "Maybe they want you, Sanders."

Ramirez caught on quickly, turning his frown upside down. "Yeah, they've been checking you out every fifteen minutes, Sanders Boy. They're probably thinking of marrying you to their daughter or something."

Sanders grinned cheekily, taking it in stride. "Well, I can't help being a stud. I was born this way."

* * *

Sam breathed in the cool air of her office and let it out slowly. Eyes closed, head popped back against the back of the chair, she took this moment to ease her headache away. The crumpled ibuprofen wrapper lay on the desk next to a half-empty glass of water, the ingested pills slowly dampening the throbbing in her head. She sighed in relief, moving her hands to massage some of the lingering pain away.

After several moments, she opened her eyes and stared into the emptiness of the dimmed room. The blinds were partially shut, giving her a moment's peace from the bustle of activity outside in the operations centre, where the dayshift crew were dealing with all the requests and reports coming in from all the departments, including the different civilian Pegasus and Milky Way communities on-base.

The Operations Centre – or OpCentre, as it'd been dubbed – had become the true hub of the city; the central management Sam insisted everyone go through to avoid complete, utter chaos. Still, they were balancing precariously on that fine line between control and chaos, especially given the outbreak of fistfights in the past two weeks.

Following their settling on this planet, Atlantis had returned from basic survival to trying to resume their old lives without the Wraith looming over them. It was hard, especially given the shock of losing the SGC and Earth, but also because in the time they'd been out of contact with their Pegasus allies, the other Wraith factions had begun stirring again in the rest of the galaxy. To what extent, Sam didn't know, but their long-range sensors and some few off-world missions had shown a lot of Wraith activity going on. They had yet to verify if the Wraith superhive and Todd's faction was involved.

Not many in Atlantis knew about this and Sam wanted to keep it that way. They needed to resume some sense of normality, to get back on track, and figure out what to do with everyone currently on board the city. There were so many people and they were all so different. Sam almost felt like she was back on Earth; the squabbling, the ego-centrism, the each-to-his-own attitudes… Only this time, she was left with the overall responsibility for everyone in this city, including the city itself.

Sam hated it, but she'd never be able to admit as much out loud. This was  _her_  command, as ordered by Major General O'Neill. She had to deal with it. For now, she just needed a breather, some distance to regain her control.

Things had spiralled too far in the meeting with the IOA earlier and Sam had nearly lost herself in the process. To have Coolidge insinuate that she prioritised the Pegasus refugees over the Earthborns… It was despicable. To her, Atlantis and the SGC had never been just about Earth and she knew many would agree with her.

But that was beside the point right now. A short break, that's what she needed, and then she'd be back on her game. There was still so much to do…

Sam's eyes opened and landed on the photo of SG-1, carefully situated next to the upraised PC tablet. The laughing faces looked at her, looked through her, saw everything.

A stone dropped into her stomach. Sam abruptly reached forward and slammed the frame facedown, and then turned firmly away.

She busied herself with some paperwork for a minute before she eyed the facedown frame again. Feeling guilty, Sam picked it up and moved it to a shelf behind her. She avoided lingering on SG-1's familiar faces, on  _her own_  face, and turned back towards her PC tablet.

Edging the chair closer to the desk, she touched a button and the lights brightened a bit. As if on cue, someone knocked on the glass door and Sam sighed.

_Guess break's over._

"Come in."

The door opened carefully, revealing Chuck in his standard blue-grey BDUs, holding his tablet in his arms. "Sorry to disturb you, ma'am. There's something I think you should see."

Sam leaned back heavily in her chair, gesturing him to enter. "Alright. What it is, Chuck? News from AR-1?"

"No, ma'am. They haven't called in, but their check-in time isn't for another hour or so." Chuck stepped forward, fingering his PC tablet. He looked very uncomfortable, which put Sam on edge. "Um…  _This_  is what I thought you should see."

Sam accepted his tablet with both hands, surveying the text on the screen. A frown marred her face as she scrolled down to the end of the document.

"Did you double-check this with Dr Keller?"

"Yes, ma'am," said Chuck. "None of them exhibited any signs of sickness. As far as she could tell, they were all physically healthy, but they still insisted on either a leave of absence or sick leave."

Narrowing her eyes at the list of thirty-eight names on the tablet screen, Sam knitted her eyebrows. They were all civilians and most of them scientists working on the repairs of Atlantis after the battle with Todd's superhive. She recognised all of the names. She'd seen whom some of these people hung out with in the mess hall and corridors, but she couldn't afford to jump to any conclusions just yet. If her nagging suspicion was correct, this could turn out very ugly.

Sam glanced up at Chuck. The sergeant seemed on edge, hesitating a little in meeting her eyes. If anything, he looked a bit guilty. She straightened in her chair and gave him her best commanding officer's look.

"Chuck, you've got eyes and ears in this city. Please tell me what you know."

* * *

Night had fallen over the Bhaati town, making the forest surrounding it look even more ominous and dark in the distance. The town square had silenced, the vendors closing their shops and the shoppers returning home to their dinners and stoves and warm houses. Reese pulled on her jacket, but the chill was difficult to shake off once it'd had a chance to set in her bones. So she walked in a casual circle in the middle of the road, Sanders and Ramirez keeping a slightly tired but tense lookout at each of the flanking houses.

They'd only been here four hours with another hour to go until check-in time, but it felt like much more than that. Strange as it was, though, when they returned to Atlantis it'd only be a little past midday. The day was still young in a different part of the galaxy.

Looking at her watch, Reese wondered what it was like back in the Milky Way. Morning, midday, evening, or night? She'd kept track in the beginning, but now she'd lost it. It was all on Pegasus time now.

"Can't wait to get back," said Sanders, stretching his legs. "A nice lunch, some decent conversations."

"As much as I hate to say it, I've gotta agree with my boy here," said Ramirez, drawing his eyes briefly away from his lookout. "This is a really strange mission, Cap'n. So what if the natives invited us? I haven't exactly felt very welcome around here."

"That's because they know the Wraith have been after us and that's made them careful."

The sudden addition of Sheppard's voice startled them a little. From around the corner, Sheppard and the rest of the original AR-1 appeared, making the three soldiers straighten to a half-attention.

"Captain," greeted Sheppard. "What's our status?"

Reese wanted to ask about Sheppard's statement, but the grim look upon his face said clearly that this wasn't the time. In fact, she picked up a sense of urgency; he wanted to get underway as soon as possible.

Pushing back her curiosity and tension, Reese said, "We spotted a few more people keeping an eye on us, but there's been nothing the past hour and a half."

"Good," said Sheppard.

He glanced around at their surroundings. Apart from the Atlanteans, the street and market square had emptied completely and the windows were shut. Only a few streams of lights escaped from somewhere around the corner, but there were no moving shadows. Still, Reese's finger itched closer to the trigger of her P90.

"We're moving out," said Sheppard, nudging McKay and Teyla on in front of him. Ronon had already reached the edge of the forest and looked back at them impatiently. "Atlantis is expecting us back within the hour. Let's not disappoint them."

The question about the Wraith was still burning in Reese's mind as they resumed a tactical file with Ronon and Sanders in front, Reese and Ramirez making up the rear, and the rest in-between. McKay had found his little Ancient gadget and was looking at it from time to time, putting Reese on edge. That thing was scanning their surroundings, most likely on Sheppard's orders. But that meant he was on edge and Reese didn't think a handful of suspicious villagers was enough to do that to such an experienced officer.

"Sir?"

Reese drew Sheppard's attention from a watchful 360 degree as they moved into the forest. She hastened a bit to keep in step with him, leaving Ramirez alone at the back of the column.

"How did the meeting go?" Reese asked, keeping her voice low. "And what'd you mean about the Wraith, sir?"

Sheppard didn't answer straight away. He eyed the forest and her critically, making Reese tense even more and become consciously aware of the difference in rank between them. Still, she was the second highest-ranking officer on this mission, and if whatever Sheppard kept quiet about was pertinent to the mission, she deserved to know.

"Sir, are you expecting trouble?" Reese prodded for the second time that day, feeling a bit reckless and subordinate in doing so. She held her ground, though, when Sheppard's piercing eyes met hers.

In the end, he seemed to give in.

"Eventually," said Sheppard darkly, his face full of shadows in the forest's evening light. "Amid – the town council leader – was pretty insistent on us staying longer. Too insistent, if you catch my drift."

Reese knitted her eyebrows. "So he didn't want us to leave… Why?"

"The Wraith have attacked Pegasus colonies more frequently than usual in the past two weeks. Some of the colonies have been old allies of the Bhaati and Atlantis, so Amid thinks the Wraith might turn on them eventually, which is why the Bhaati want our protection in exchange for food and whatever other supplies they can offer."

"There's something more about the Wraith, isn't there, sir?" Reese could feel it in her bones and by the serious tone of Sheppard's voice.

"Yeah… The Wraith haven't just been culling, but also razed villages, destroyed crops, things they haven't bothered with before…and they've asked questions."

"Questions about what, sir?"

Sheppard's low voice in the darkness sent shivers down Reese's spine. "Atlantis."

"Atl—?"

"Oh great, it's stopped working." McKay's half-snarky, half-worried voice cut through the darkness of the forest, his face almost immediately lit up by the flashlight on Teyla's wrist. He held up the Ancient life-signs scanner. "I told those kids not to play with it."

"Is it broken?" Teyla asked in concern, stepping closer.

Reese tried not to be distracted from keeping an eye on their right-hand side, with Ramirez covering the rear and Sheppard on her left. Each of them flashed their lights briefly at McKay and Teyla, but Sheppard's stayed longer before returning to the undergrowth.

"These things don't break…I think." McKay halted in his tracks, fiddling with the Ancient device.

"We're not stopping, Rodney," said Sheppard sharply. "The stargate's just a few hundred metres away. You can have a look at it when we get back." He turned to face the front of the group. "Sanders! Go on ahead and dial up the 'gate."

Sanders answered in the affirmative, his shadow setting off at a run in the dim light. Reese couldn't shake off the uneasy feeling that'd been with her the past few hours as she watched him jog away. Ronon's broad, tall shape remained just a few metres ahead of them, the back of him occasionally lit up by their swerving flashlights.

Two minutes passed. Then five. The forest was eerily silent. Trees began to stand further apart as they closed in on the clearing where the stargate was located, letting a bit more evening light onto the path.

Reese saw out of the corner of her eye how Sheppard crouched slightly and kept his weapon at the ready, immediately putting her further on edge. He watched the forest but didn't say anything. The silence was almost unbearable.

"Shouldn't we hear the 'gate going off about now, sir?" Reese found herself asking, her fingers tightening around her P90. "We're close enough."

"Easy, Captain." Sheppard's response was firm.

It didn't calm her down but it reminded her to stay frosty. She narrowed her eyes into the dim light, keeping a close eye on any movement in the undergrowth on her right. Fortunately, a bit of moonlight escaped through the branches, making it easier to see the difference between tree trunks and moving shadows.

Just as Reese glanced back to check on Ramirez, a scream tore through the forest.

" _Damn_." Sheppard swore below his breath. "That doesn't sound good. Matthews, on me. Ronon, stay—"

Sheppard's order was cut short as the undergrowth suddenly rose up and stormed towards them, roaring incomprehensibly in innumerable human voices.

In the chaos of flashlights and moving shadows that immediately followed, Reese moved sideways on instinct, which was just in time as she felt the rush of air above her head from something heavy. Looking up, her flashlight caught on something glinting and she jumped out of the way as it surged back towards her.

In the darkness, the undergrowth grotesquely started sprouting arms and legs as the camouflaging twigs fell off human limbs. With a few feet between them and the attackers, Reese could see that they were locked in a bottleneck situation on the road. There were people blocking both their way to the stargate and the way back to the village, and not just a few. Their team had to be outnumbered at least three-to-one.

Reese could glimpse the white in their attackers' eyes and her heart skipped at the crazy look directed at her in the blinking light. She gripped her P90, slinging it forward to try and threaten them off as one of the attackers roared forward, swinging a club of some sort. She backpedalled, feeling vulnerable with her back exposed to the forest.

In the distance, Sanders was still screaming.

"Colonel!" Reese cried out, hoping for some orders.

Somewhere to her left she could see Ramirez, or what she thought was the Sergeant, with McKay and Teyla behind him. It was hard to discern faces in these conditions; the clearing ahead only created faceless silhouettes that seemed to tower above her.

"Warning shots only!" Sheppard yelled. "They're Bhaati!"

"What the hell?" That was definitely Ramirez's voice, so the one on her left was a friendly. Reese immediately turned her back towards him, feeling a bit safer to know he was there.

A sharp movement in the corner of her eye made Reese flinch back, again narrowly escaping the path of a large wooden club. Because of the darkness, Reese struggled to calculate the distance. She relied on her instincts again, swerving on her feet as her attacker took another swing at her.

The P90 was hardly any decent in close-quarters combat as a butting option, forcing Reese to dodge the third swing from her attacker and pull the weapon around to use it for blocking instead as the club came on the return. She heard the weapons fire from a different P90 as she jumped away, but didn't look around to see whom it'd come from. The scream of pain was enough to tell it'd hurt  _someone_ , and she trusted the shooter enough to not have hit one of their own.

Reese tried to put some distance between herself and her attacker, but the man kept going savagely at her, pushing her off the road and up against a tree trunk. She ducked under his arm as he threw the club around and ran, only to get caught in a glancing blow from a different club-wielding Bhaati, who suddenly appeared in front of her.

" _Fuck!_ " The epithet escaped her lips before she knew it.

Reese stumbled sideways until she crashed into the dirt ground. Pain shot up her left arm in waves, paralyzing it. Over her, the Bhaati lined up for another shot, only to be hit by some sort of red energy straight to the chest. He crumpled heavily across her legs, another one of his mates falling prey to the same energy weapon second later.

"Argh, dammit!" Reese cursed, rolling over and trying to get to her feet. She kicked away from the heavy Bhaati lying spread-eagled across her feet, hearing a satisfying  _crack_ as she hit his face. Then another foot joined in and pushed the man off her, before a strong hand pulled her up.

"You alright?" It was Ronon, who sent off another shot at one of the Bhaati pinning down Ramirez with some sort of staff. The Satedan had blood running down his face; it was an eerie sheen in the dimness.

"Yeah," gritted Reese out, holding her left arm close to her chest. It felt pretty much useless. The club had definitely punched a nerve centre. Worst-case scenario, something was broken.

Reese looked beyond Ronon just in time to see another shadow dislodge from the forest, glinting silver in the dim light. "Get down!"

She pushed Ronon sideways, but it was like pushing a wall until he reacted to her shout. They dropped to the ground, Reese on top. The arrow shot through the air, disappearing somewhere on the opposite side of the road.

They had no time to share thanks as the Reese's first attacked came at them, raising his large club with a heave and bringing it down hard. Ronon pushed Reese off, both rolling to separate sides, narrowly avoiding the blow. It made a deep dent in the dirt.

Unable to push herself up since she was lying on her left side, Reese pulled her combat knife out of the sheath on her leg. Without thinking, she lodged it deep inside the leg of the burly Bhaati as he positioned himself for the next attack. He cried out in pain and dropped the club.

Reese saw it fall towards her head as if in slow motion and then everything went black.

* * *

Walking into IOA territory felt like walking into an Ori village before the Ark of Truth, or a Jaffa camp before Dakara. There was an oppressive tension in the air and no one but a few brave ones seemed to meet Sam's stare.

Stalking through the corridors of one of the largest towers on the West Pier – incidentally where all of the surviving IOA members were housed, along with most of the Earth evacuees and some Pegasus refugees – Sam glanced left and right while keeping her mind on her destination. The tension in her neck increased with each brisk step that brought her forward among ex-SGC colleagues, both military and civilian, a few original Atlantis Expedition members, and even some Pegasus natives who looked rather frightened and kept to the wall as she passed.

The picture was growing clearer with every minute spent in this hotpot of IOA territory, and Sam cursed herself harder and harder for being so blind and clueless. She bet Coolidge and Xiaoyi were laughing in glee inside their "offices". Or at least Coolidge would, since Xiaoyi hardly ever showed a shred of being emotionally touched by something. The woman was pure ice.

Coming up to the security point separating the housing areas and the main corridor leading to transporters and local mess hall, Sam went straight on. She paused only to let the security personnel run the weapons scanner over her.

After the violent wave of fights breaking out last week between different groups, she'd organised these checkpoints to make sure weapons were kept out of the large public areas where the fights had mainly taken place. It worked in keeping the fights from becoming bloodbaths and remaining only verbal spats, but the remaining IOA members – of course – still didn't think it was enough.

Sam wanted to throw them all out. Maybe transport them to a locked storage room on the  _Daedalus_  and then leave them on a distant planet. Unfortunately, as she'd learned from Chuck and the people on his list, she couldn't do that. They were too damn popular.

Twisting abruptly down a corner, Sam gritted her teeth as she saw her target at the end of the hallway.

"Ms Xiaoyi. Can I have a moment of your time,  _please?_ "

Sam nearly spat the last word out, hating herself for even showing an ounce of politeness, but the situation called for basic niceties. There were too much at stake and there were witnesses. She needed to keep her cool, which was difficult as hell since the Chinese woman didn't seem the slightest bit surprised. In fact, Sam could've sworn Xiaoyi smirked briefly.

Pushing down an instinctive angry rebuke, Sam looked at the crowd of people surrounding Xiaoyi and added pointedly, "In private?"

"Of course, Colonel Carter," said Xiaoyi graciously, giving her peers a small smile. "We will resume our…discussion…tomorrow." She turned to Sam, who felt like the people who now passed her were grinning behind her back. "We can talk in my quarters, Colonel. We won't be disturbed there."

The icy smile annoyed Sam to pieces, but she kept her jaw locked as she followed the Chinese woman down a few doors and waited while Xiaoyi entered the pass code.

Soon they were inside the small-sized Spartan quarters, where the lights turned on as they entered. Sam remained standing while Xiaoyi sat down in an office chair by a small desk, both of which she must have received from someone with access to the original Expedition storage areas since they weren't of Ancient design. It furthered Sam's conviction that the woman and the IOA had connections, even within Sam's own people.

"What can I do for you, Colonel?" Xiaoyi sat primly in the chair and interlaced her fingers carefully. Sam's fists clenched briefly at her sides.

"I don't think we need to skirt around the issue and play pretend, Ms Xiaoyi. We both know clearly what's going on. I want you to call off the strike."

A thin line replaced Xiaoyi's smile. "I'm afraid we cannot do that. You see, Colonel Carter, we didn't propose this strike and so we have no hand in organising it. I would be glad to make inquiries into it and seek out the people responsible, but I would advise against forcing these people back to work. They are very upset."

Sam had noticed. Nearly everyone on the list Chuck had given her had been nearly hostile when she came around to their quarters to speak with them and figure out where the shoe was pushing.

"I can understand their issues, but this is  _not_  the way to deal with it. They should've come to me or anyone of the command staff, and we could've resolved this internally."

Xiaoyi raised a calculated eyebrow. "They are civilians,  _Colonel_. They are not someone you can boss around. They do not answer to you."

"They are still considered to have contracts with the Air Force," said Sam, her eyes narrowed. "As long as I'm the appointed commander of this base, that clearly means they are under  _my_  command." She crossed her arms, staring defiantly back at the Chinese woman, whose eyes hardened.

"Those contracts were annulled the second they stepped through the stargate five weeks ago. They were forced away from their home and everyone they loved by  _your_  Air Force." Xiaoyi's voice raised just a notch, her eyes glinting briefly before she regained control. She gave Sam an icy stare. "Do not think they care much for the legal work, Colonel. As far as they're concerned, they are no longer required to follow the command of the military and they are not alone."

The threat was obvious. The tension in Sam's neck increased as she struggled to keep her anger down. No words came to her, though. She felt played by an underhanded manoeuvre, a sneak-attack, and she was suddenly very exposed between a rock and a hard place. She hadn't seen it coming, not really.

If she forced the issue, the strike would only continue, making the still critical repairs on Atlantis after the Wraith attack two weeks prior severely behind schedule. Her only option would then be to implement Martial Law, and there was no way in hell she was going to jeopardise the precarious  _status quo_  they'd reached after settling on this planet. Not to mention the ideological and political repercussions of doing that. This could spread like wildfire among the rest of the civilians – and even the military – and the last thing Sam needed was more people rallying to the IOA's cause, turning Atlantis into a political battleground that would most definitely turn very ugly in the end.

If she gave in to the strike's demands, however, that'd mean the remaining IOA members had won and their followers would definitely feel encouraged to continue to expand their territory and influence. And it would only confirm that she was a weak leader, making the people still recognising her command doubt her, even if they still followed her orders.

_What would you do, Jack?_

There was no answer and Sam felt disheartened to remember that Major General O'Neill had been on the SGC when it…

Sam fisted her hands and fixed her eyes on Xiaoyi. There was a bad taste in her mouth as she said, "What'd you want? And no more games, Ms Xiaoyi. Give it to me plain and simple, and don't take me for a fool. I know the IOA had a hand in this, one way or another."

Xiaoyi pursed her lips and gave Sam a pointed stare before admitting, "Alright. I will say it plainly." Her eyes hardened. "Relocate the refugees to a different planet. Let Atlantis become an Earth colony. Let us face it: we are all that is left."

An immediate rebuke threatened to burst out, but Sam kept her mouth shut, repressing the memories of a silver-haired man's face on a screen wishing her Merry Christmas.

After a moment, she said lowly, "They're all that's left of their people as well. Only they've got no grand military base of their own that can shelter them from the Wraith."

"Do not think I'm completely heartless, Colonel Carter," said Xiaoyi, yet her features were expressionless. "I sympathise with them. We can offer them humanitarian help, but you should realise that these people are farmers, hunters, collectors. They have no place in a city such as Atlantis."

Anger reared up again, but Sam found her words cut off by the sudden spark of her earpiece radio.

" _OpCentre to Colonel Carter."_ Amelia Banks's tense voice rang through her ear. " _We need you up here, ma'am. AR-1 came in hot. They've got casualties."_

* * *

John stood along the wall of the Atlantis infirmary, fully equipped, grimy and bloody from a blow to the head with a stone. It was another reminder that an enemy didn't have to carry projectile or energy weapons, or be particularly trained, to injure one of Earth's finest. No matter how advanced weaponry and armour you wore, the most basic weapons could still hurt…and kill.

"How the hell could this happen? He's just a kid."

Due to the adrenaline still in his system, John heard Captain Matthews' whispered question behind him. She lay dazed on one of the infirmary beds, completely unaware of the medical staff tending to her arm and head wound. On an opposite bed, Ronon sat topless while a nurse stitched a gash on his back, while Sergeant Ramirez, McKay and Teyla lurked quietly in the background.

No one answered Matthews' question.

John turned back to the window so he could see what went on inside the surgery. Between Keller's back and the anaesthesiologist, there was a gap revealing Sanders' pale face. He looked as if he was just sleeping, not having life-saving emergency surgery.

While the rest of them had mostly suffered hits and bruises from clubs and hammers, no less than three arrows had pierced Sanders. It didn't look promising. Despite Keller's expertly handling of the surgical instruments, John knew only a miracle could save the kid.

He closed his eyes, cursing. His hand fisted and itched to punch the wall behind him. It didn't help relieve his anger when a different female voice sounded in the background.

"Where is he?"

The tone in Sam's voice broke the dam that held back his anger. There was no doubt he was her intended target. No one could be that irritated at dying kid. He turned with a furious glare as Sam stormed around the corner, her eyes hard and her jaw locked.

"Colonel, what the hell happened? This was supposed to be a  _peaceful_  trade mission."

"Tell that to the guys with the sticks and stones,  _ma'am_." John gritted out.

He couldn't help the edged tone to his voice. He'd almost lost three of his people today; he wasn't in the mood for sweet talk. Still, they were in a semi-public place, not her office. People were watching. He saw Ronon giving them a furtive look out of the corner of his eye, though McKay had no such reservations. The Canadian looked like a fish out of water.

"We went in there, talked trade with the town leader Amid and his people, and got out. Somewhere in the midst of that, some of the Bhaati decided we shouldn't be there at all and they set up a trap to capture us." John's voice was low as he stepped closer to Sam, almost breaking into her personal space. She crossed her arms firmly and held her ground. "I'm  _guessing_  that they wanted to hand us over to the Wraith instead of becoming our allies."

"Why?" Sam lowered her voice as well, sounding completely professional. Her eyes were not quite as hard now, but John brushed it off. That train had passed.

"The Wraith've been attacking some of the Bhaati's allies, asking questions about Atlantis and our whereabouts," said John. He remained in his spot, tense, anger still coiling uneasily in his stomach. "That's why they wanted to open up trade again. They want protection from the Wraith and they know we can give it."

Sam put her hands on her hips, drawing herself up to her full height. She glanced at the surgery room on the other side of the see-through glass. Keller was still working quickly but firmly on Sanders. Her lips thinned and she turned back to John.

"How can you be sure the trap wasn't ordered by Amid?"

John locked his jaw as the realisation dawned upon him. "I don't."

Sam looked at him, her eyes glinting slightly. "Until we're completely sure of the Bhaati's intentions, we're not promising them any protection."

He knew it was a tactical decision, a reasonable and logical one, but there was still something that made John want to object.

He stepped into her personal sphere, but Sam didn't seem to notice. She stared at the surgery room, where Keller and her staff were now looking up at a flat line on the screen. It was accompanied with a long, continuous beep. Keller turned and gave them both a sad shake of her head.

_Damn._

John fisted his hand, closing his eyes briefly as he swallowed the urge to punch something, or someone. Beside him, Sam moved from her frozen position and he almost thought he could hear a waver in her voice, but it disappeared as quickly as he had heard it.

"I'll expect your report in two hours."

She didn't look at him again as she walked out through the infirmary, past frowns and wide-eyed expressions that instead turned to John for whatever confirmation or comfort they sought. Cursing inwardly, John glanced through the window to where Sanders' face was covered up with a linen cloth.

He hated this part.

* * *

  
**Next:** "Take up our quarrel."

* * *


	8. Day 58

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the Wraith reassert themselves again in the galaxy, the IOA digs their claws deeper into the administration of Atlantis. But will unexpected events convince Sam that the only way to fight is through open war?
> 
> Edited July 2015.

 

* * *

**SEVEN | "Take up our quarrel."**

_Prompt: a time to decide_

* * *

**DAY 58**

Captain Reese Matthews felt sombre as she equipped for the upcoming off-world mission in the armoury. The motions were more mechanical than conscious as she put on the tac-vest, clipped the P90 to it, and filled the pockets with a few spare mags, field rations and C4. They weren't expecting a fight, but after the incident with the Bhaati, Colonel Carter had told all teams to be prepared for anything, even going as far as sidestepping the temporary ammo rationing. Colonel Sheppard had conveyed the message, adding that if they were forced to fight, they shouldn't hold back. This was their home now.

Somehow, Reese was glad they had Colonel Sheppard. Ever since the Bhaati incident, he'd looked after them, always giving them advice if the teams were going out without him or assigning more team members for added security. In the wake of Sanders' death, he'd approached her and let her speak her mind. She'd kept back, of course, but it felt reassuring to know there was an officer she could turn to if there was something on her mind. She hadn't felt that since she was back at the SGC.

It'd been hard to lose Sanders, but she needed to go on, to deal with it. She was still a team leader and people were looking to her. Sheppard had reminded her of that.

But how did you move on when it was becoming just a little more difficult to get out of bed every morning?

"Mornin', Captain."

Sergeant Miguel Ramirez entered the armoury, followed by the two new members Sheppard had assigned to her team. Dr Jeremy 'Jerry' Stevenson was their basic scientist and anthropologist, Staff Sergeant Eileen Kerrick their Air Force engineer. They were a ragtag team but all of them were from the former SGC, so at least they knew of each other peripherally before being put together.

"So…scouting, huh?" said Stevenson conversationally after putting on his tac-vest. "Sounds fun."

"Ain't nothin' that fun," said Kerrick, jerking her weapons off the rack and moving on to the ammunitions caches. Ramirez handed her a few mags, which she slipped into the pockets of her vest with a grimace. "I can think of a thing or two more fun than this."

"Like making wells and cutting down trees?" asked Ramirez with a raised eyebrow. He clipped the P90 to his vest and kneeled to fasten a combat knife to his leg. "I hear your buddies've got their work cut out for them setting up camps on the refugee worlds."

"At least they get to blow things up," growled Kerrick, waving a pack of C4 to underline her point before pocketing it. "Which is more than I'm gonna be doin'. Stupid recons."

Reese chose not to say anything in response as she lingered by the doorway, waiting for the rest to finish suiting up. Sometimes people just needed to air things before moving on. She preferred to do it before the mission rather than underway. As for the topic… She found it'd been an issue for many people, some more surprising than others. Only yesterday, she'd heard one of the NCOs celebrating the sudden decision to relocate the refugees Atlantis had picked up before the evacuation from Earth.

As a Captain, she didn't have the right to know what happened on command level decisions that weren't strictly military, but… In her opinion, it seemed Colonel Carter had been too harsh in expelling the Pegasus refugees from the city. Of course, rumours said the IOA had a hand in it, but Reese had long ago decided not to trust rumours, especially on a military base. Though she wouldn't put it past the IOA remnant to try something – she'd been in the mess hall that day they landed on this planet – she thought Colonel Carter was made of harder stuff than this. It'd seemed like it in the past, at least. After all, it'd only taken Reese two weeks into the stargate programme to hear the legends of Carter and SG-1's achievements.

Listening to Ramirez and Kerrick starting to bicker rather bitingly, a behaviour that was becoming exceedingly familiar and annoying, Reese sighed and shifted on her feet.

"Come on, guys, we're on the clock here," Reese said sharply. "Get moving."

Huffing but conceding to her authority, Kerrick turned on her heel and practically stomped past Reese, followed by the rather nervous Stevenson, who hadn't dared say another word during the exchange. Ramirez remained behind, eyes dark as he stared after the other team members, his hands on the P90.

He'd changed somewhat after Sanders' death, but Reese couldn't blame him. That'd be hypocritical of her. Instead, after a moment's silence, she prompted, "Sergeant."

When Ramirez's stare rounded on her, his presence strong, Reese held her ground and added firmly, "Let's go."

His demeanour changed slowly, the dark features replaced by what appeared to be a condescending smile. "Yes, ma'am."

Ramirez popped chewing gum into his mouth as he walked past her, but didn't meet her eyes again.

Holding back a sigh, Reese hitched the P90 up in her hands and followed the sergeant out of the armoury. The door closed behind them, the locks clicking in place. The two Airmen stationed as guards stared into the air like statues, letting them pass with only a minor acknowledgment to their rank insignias.

* * *

"With all due respect, Colonel Sheppard, fighting the Wraith should no longer be our concern."

"And I'm  _telling_  you, the Wraith superhive is a sitting duck."

Eyes narrowed, fists clenched, John felt close to the bursting point, which was  _not_  what he'd expected when he'd walked into this meeting earlier. This was supposed to have been an easy in-and-out mission, an elevator pitch, and a  _damn cakewalk._ Instead, it'd turned into the bureaucratic version of the Spanish Inquisition.

"If we strike at them  _right now_  with everything we've got, we'll get rid of that damn thing once and for all, or I swear to God, it's gonna come back and bite us in the ass." John blew a frustrated breath, adding in a mutter, "don't know about you, but I prefer mine whole."

No smirk. No response. Seated across from him, Sam only stared stoically somewhere just to the right of his face, her lips taut in grimace. At his side, Caldwell showed more presence, clearly considering his proposal but still woefully silent. In fact, he seemed to subtly look to the surprise addition fixed between him and Sam, who'd so far been the only voice besides John's.

Shen Xiaoyi, creepy x-ray vision and all, looked prim and proper in her impeccable business suit – a stark contrast to the somewhat creased uniforms and jumpsuits the three colonels wore. As she'd wasted no time telling him earlier, she was the new IOA representative to the senior council. And yes, they were calling it a council now. 'Senior staff' was apparently misleading and excluding, so of course they were trying to avoid hurting anyone's feelings.

_Not that any of the other department heads has been summoned here. Apparently this wasn't deemed worthy of their attention…or is it the other way 'round?_

Whatever murky thoughts were running through John's mind, were cut short as Xiaoyi spoke up once more, her voice almost a drone.

"Thanks to Colonel Carter's solution with the zero point modules, Atlantis is protected from the Wraith superhive's sensors." Xiaoyi levelled her eyes at him, her fingers interlacing carefully on top of the conference table. "I think you will find that many in this city agree that we have lost enough people, Colonel. As such, we should instead focus our efforts on our new home and how we will acquire new resources,  _not_  expend what little we already have."

The idea was so tactically foreign right now that John, holding back his anger, glanced at Sam expectantly. He could somewhat understand Caldwell's silence given the history between him and Xiaoyi, but Sam's had blindsided him. Just a few weeks ago, she'd almost thrown Coolidge out of her office with her bare hands. Today, though, she'd followed the back-and-forth argumentation wordlessly, even through some of Xiaoyi's more radical ideas. But that couldn't hold for long, John figured. Colonel Samantha Carter had fought harder battles than that, damn it, and he'd seen the hint of a spark in those eyes of hers earlier.

And yet… now there was nothing but an expressionless façade as she stared down at her clasped hands. He almost growled.

" _Atlantis_  might be protected,  _for now_ ," John bit out, turning his narrowed eyes back at Xiaoyi as blood began to pound in his ears, "but what about our people out there in Pegasus? We  _can't_  just leave them."

"Humanitarian aid—" Xiaoyi began, but she was cut off.

"We're  _not_  leaving anyone behind."

The words were sharp and unexpected, yet welcomed. Looking back at their source, John saw Sam giving Xiaoyi a hard look as if sensing a rebuttal. The woman gave none, seeming entirely unfazed. Nevertheless, a sense of relief coursed through him…at least until Sam turned her eyes on him, her jaw tight. He knew that look by now.

"However, we can't overextend our resources," Sam said lowly. "I'm all for sending the help we can afford, Colonel, but we can't engage in open hostilities with the Wraith. Not with our current standing."

Xiaoyi nodded in agreement, looking to John with what he was sure was supposed to be a reassuring smile. It made him cringe inwardly.

"Do not believe we'll leave them high and dry, Colonel," Xiaoyi said. "Your engineers have already prepared several worlds for settlement. Rich worlds with plenty of natural resources. I believe some do not even have stargates, which in my understanding should make them safe from detection by the Wraith."

"Sure, that sounds very nice and all, but you're forgetting one little thing," said John sarcastically, holding one finger up for emphasis. "Thanks to their ZPMs — and we know they've got more than two due to that subspace sensor thingy — the superhive's got upgrades we can only guess at. If they want to, they're gonna find those planets and what d'you think'll happen then? They'll kill everyone, just like they've been doing the past month."

John narrowed his eyes dangerously, leaning forward across the table towards Xiaoyi. "That's genocide, Ms Xiaoyi. You wanna have that on your conscience?"

An awkward silence ensued, with John keeping his eyes trained on Xiaoyi, never breaking eye contact, and Sam and Caldwell eyeing each other in the background. The tension was suffocating. For several moments, John held on. Then Xiaoyi withdrew her eyes and a sense of victory filled him. Although she appeared to concede to his point, the hard lines on her face told John that this battle was far from over.

"Even if Atlantis would be able – and willing – to send help," said Xiaoyi after a moment, "how would the planets in question be able to notify us of their need, especially if they do not have a stargate? "

She looked at each of them with a raised eyebrow, her hands folded calmly on the tabletop.

This time, it was Caldwell who broke his self-imposed silence, his voice serious. " _Daedalus_  already makes weekly visits to many of these worlds and will continue to monitor them in the future. With one of the ZPMs left over from Atlantis installed, we can also extend our long-range sensors. If the Wraith are attacking a friendly planet within that sensor grid, refugee or otherwise, we'll pick it up."

The definite tone in the senior Colonel's voice assuaged a few of the doubts in John's mind, causing him to ease back in his seat. At least for the moment.

Directing his self-assured and respected demeanour at all of them, Caldwell continued. "As for the Wraith superhive itself…  _Daedalus_ 's systems have overall been considerably boosted by the ZPM and we're now able to get in and out of a system quickly without being detected. We could evaluate the situation."

John perked up and noticed in the corner of his eye that Sam stirred in her seat.

"Last time we checked, Todd's superhive had moved from the nebula to a nearby system, but they were still regenerating," Caldwell said. "If they're still there, we could drop a Mark 8 and halt their regeneration. If we get a lucky shot… Well, I don't think anyone would mind."

"Except Todd," John said, smirking darkly at the thought. Xiaoyi looked like she wished to roll her eyes and clearly ignored him in favour of Caldwell.

"Even so, Colonel, for how long do you think you can halt the superhive's regeneration?" Xiaoyi regained her oppositional tone without a hitch. "There is to my understanding a limited supply of nuclear devices and we have no means presently of making more. If you cannot destroy the superhive in one attack, or three, I do not see how this would help Atlantis or our'allies' in the long run apart from the proverbial poking of the bear."

After a short moment of silence, Xiaoyi's eyes went to Sam coolly, her voice lowered and razor sharp. "What concerns me is that you all seem to be ignoring the possibility that the proposed attacks on the refugee planets are simply a ruse; a ploy used by the Wraith, in conjunction with people like the Bhaati, in an attempt to lure us out."

On the other side of the table, Sam's eyes glinted at the undoubtedly veiled stab at her competence, and it looked briefly like she wanted to bite something out in retort, but nothing passed her taut lips.

John clenched his teeth and looked away, his blood boiling up again at the pitiful sight. Sam had fought the IOA so fiercely in the weeks after they'd evacuated to Atlantis, but now… she was letting Xiaoyi run all over her with barely any resistance and the show was pissing him off. Colonel Samantha Carter had more guts than this, dammit! Only last week, she'd fought him to the brink of a fistfight over her decision to relocate the Pegasus refugees off-world. Even if she'd been spouting arguments he now found echoing in the infuriatingly calm and icy Xiaoyi, that display of force still counted for something.

However, if she'd lost the guts to resist the IOA, then by God, he'd take them on. Not on behalf of her, but on behalf of the refugees and the people in this city who were the true innocents of this power struggle. After all, he was still Sam's  _de jure_ second-in-command. No IOA representative could take that position away from him, no matter how smartly they dressed for meetings.

Eyes narrowed in determination, John watched the woman in question turn to Caldwell.

"Colonel, if Atlantis is not capable of defeating the superhive, what makes you think the  _Daedalus_ is capable of doing so? Yes, the ZPM is in all likelihood able to boost your shields and Asgard weapons, but will it be enough? Is it worth the risk of leaving Atlantis' military strength severely reduced should things turn out adversely?"

Eyebrows arched in silent question, Xiaoyi looked at each of them in turn, her shoulders relaxed and her features containing an air of superiority. Her icy eyes fell last on Sam, who only stared back at Xiaoyi with a hard look of her own, her hands fisted together on top of the table.

"I say it is." John met Xiaoyi's eyes in challenge. "I'm sure you know by now that the military  _don't_  leave our people behind _._ "

"Even at the cost of your own?" asked Xiaoyi, unperturbed, though her emotionless face darkened briefly.

John gritted his teeth. "There's always risks in hostile situations. Every man and woman in this city knows that."

Xiaoyi didn't miss a beat. "And what of friendly situations, Colonel?"

The shock of those words was enough to leave him speechless. Everyone around the table knew instantly what Xiaoyi referred to. After all, the memories from two weeks ago and the young man they'd buried on the mainland afterwards were still fresh in mind.

John felt an icy stone drop into his stomach and his wary eyes glanced briefly in Sam's direction, recalling the aftermath of that event with overpowering clarity.

Xiaoyi seemed to notice their reactions and her straight-faced expression screamed victory as she told him, "May I remind you, Colonel Sheppard, that you yourself fell victim to a ruse that was going to capture you and deliver you to the Wraith. By a people who had once been on completely amicable terms with you."

"You know as well as I do that there's been no confirmation of that," John said lowly, his fingernails digging into his palms in repressed anger. Blood started pounding more furiously in his ears.

"You cannot expect me to believe that they had honourable intentions when they attacked your team and killed Private Trevor Sanders, Colonel," said Xiaoyi coolly, leaning forward on the table, hands clasped. "Just as I will not believe that the two scientists who were lost on PX6-74D last week were as 'safe' as you promised."

" _John_."

John had  _almost_ pushed to his feet, fists ready, but now he stopped at the sharp edge in Sam's voice. She leaned forward in her seat, her eyes solely focussed on him as if there was just the two of them in here.

And for the first time in a long while, John felt the connection that'd once drawn them together. In that second, he thought they had an understanding. In those large blue eyes, he lost sight of the full-bird Colonel and saw only the woman. His friend. His confidante. The one who'd comforted him after his father's funeral, and whom he'd comforted after General Hammond's. The one who'd said that 'yes', they'd get through this. They'd survive.

Then Sam's eyes darted to Xiaoyi and her low, firm voice shattered the illusion. "Ms Xiaoyi is right. Our weaponry isn't strong enough to destroy the superhive completely. Even with a boost from the ZPM, the Asgard beams wouldn't cut it. If the  _Daedalus_  went up against someone as strong as that superhive, we'd certainly come out on the losing side. We can't risk it."

John was tempted to call her on the change of topic, but Sam's expression hardened and she moved without pause to Xiaoyi. "However, I will agree to a reconnaissance mission by the  _Daedalus_. We need to know where our enemies are and our latest intel's already too old by a week." She looked back at Caldwell, who met her eyes head-on, almost as if he'd expected it. "When can you be ready to move out?"

"Recalling the crew, preparing the ship… Give us 90 minutes."

"Good," said Sam. She squared her shoulders as she turned to face Xiaoyi again, her tone definite but light. "That's settled. We have more issues on the agenda, but seeing as it's almost lunch-time I'd say we could do with a break."

Xiaoyi nodded, but John thought her fixed smile was a tad bit too polite and cold. "I agree, Colonel Carter. Perhaps we shall reconvene in one hour? Excepting Colonel Caldwell, of course."

Sam nodded, her smile strained but present.

Xiaoyi rose to her feet as calmly as ever, unhurriedly gathering her files. John fisted his hands at his sides, but kept his mouth shut. She looked at them, giving a curt nod. "Colonels."

They all nodded back, silent. Gathering her papers in a pile, Sam stood and picked up her PC tablet in the process. Caldwell followed Xiaoyi with his eyes as she left the conference room. Once the doors closed behind her, he looked at Sam with a narrowed, serious stare.

"Carter," he said lowly. "I don't know what kind of deal Ms Xiaoyi made with Mr Woolsey, but I hope you know what you're doing, allowing her into this. If this doesn't go well…"

"We need the IOA as much as they need us," Sam said dismissively, fiddling with her PC tablet.

"Do  _we_?" muttered John darkly. He couldn't help think that he'd heard that argument once before and it hadn't ended well.

Sam only gave him a mixed look as if she was conflicted, then turned and left through the opening conference room doors. It was becoming a regular occurrence. John could only watch her leave with an uncomfortable churning in his stomach.

From the other side of the table, Caldwell appraised him coolly. John ignored him and followed Sam's example: leaving without a word.

* * *

"Getting anything?"

Reese found herself forced to shout into the radio, having turned the volume up as far as she could. She hoped that Stevenson could get anything out of the garble on his end. She swiped the mist on the outside of her goggles, cursing beneath her breath at whatever weather gods she had offended.

No one had told them they were going to step into a storm. The few MALPs Atlantis had were undergoing repairs after having been jostled around in the last battle with the Wraith superhive, so apparently no one had seen the need for a robotic evaluation before heading out, and it had frankly never crossed Reese's mind either. After all, they'd been here before, or AR-1 had before the Evacuation.

Ranking as the equivalent of 18th century industrial Europe, the Avrosians were one of the many societies in the Pegasus galaxy that'd once been in trade relations with Atlantis, which was why Atlantis wanted to re-connect with them after the cat-and-mouse chase with the Wraith. Reese's team was there to re-establish that contact.

That was if they ever managed to  _find_  the damn city! They'd trotted around in the complete, utter, stormy dark among stones and bushes for almost two hours, drifting several klicks away from the stargate. It made her wish at least one of them had been given the ATA gene therapy so they could've taken a Jumper. Although Stevenson had the gene, he'd never flown a Jumper and only managed to operate minor Ancient technology, so he didn't count. Unfortunately, giving the gene therapy to the rest of the team was deemed far less important in the grand scheme of all things that was Atlantis base priorities during emergency periods. At least in _this_  particular period of crisis.

Crackling in her ear, Stevenson's reply was just another string of garbled words, taking her a moment to decipher.

_"—othing.—this interference is—essing—ith the—. We should—ead—towar—rgate."_

Ancient life signs detector was still blind then, Reese summed up. Or they'd strayed so far off-course that there was no civilisation to pick up apart from them. There was a limited range on the detector after all. That meant they had to step back, change tactics.

Halting, Reese turned around with her flashlight, looking for the rest of the team. They'd tried to stick close with flashlights and glowsticks to locate them, but the harsh winds whipping at them and foggy rain had already spread them out of sight two times. Fortunately, she could see all of the three green sticks glowing in the stormy dark. What she couldn't see, however, was where the hell they were. Apart from the rain pelting down on them and the firm ground beneath their feet, as well as the somewhat distinctive shadows rising in the background that could be mountains – or buildings for whatever she knew – it was nearly complete darkness. Even the moon was dark.

Waving her flashlight, Reese made them converge on her location. Kerrick was cursing openly in Irish; half of the words surviving the radio interference still sounded completely alien to Reese. Ramirez was quiet, standing on her left with his hands on the P90. Stevenson was adjusting his goggles with a grimace, pushing hair out of his face.

They stood close together, trying to shield off some of the rain and gusts of wind. With the electrical interference from the storm — Stevenson's assumption — Reese turned from radio amplification and resorted to the Air Force's equivalent of sign language to tell them they were going back to the stargate and call for back-up.

"—bloody time!" shouted Kerrick through the rain, her face drawn in a grimace behind water-proof goggles. Hers was probably one of the few voices that could carry decently enough through this storm. "I hate—damn planet—!"

Reese held back a groan. They were  _all_  wet, cold, frustrated and overcome with a rather foul stench from what could only be nearby marshes. Kerrick was just voicing it. Still, she tried to keep the spirits up.

She stepped closer to them and shouted at the top of her voice, "I'm sure Atlantis will get us a Jumper; that should get us out of this foggy storm! Stevenson, you're on point with Kerrick. Let's get going!" She waved and gestured them into action, making her decision clear in case the storm carried away her voice.

It was the most logical decision. Kerrick was antsy to do something and Stevenson had the Ancient gadget, but as Reese watched them climb the low hill they'd just descended, stumbling in the shadows, she thought maybe she should've chosen caution over impatience and sent Ramirez ahead. Somehow, she just  _knew_  it would come back biting her in the butt.

* * *

Major Kevin Marks hadn't seen his commanding officer look so troubled in over a month. It was as if something was unnerving him deeply. For as long as he'd known Colonel Steven Caldwell, Marks had figured nothing could truly shake him. The only thing that came close was the Evacuation, as he'd heard some people calling it in the mess.

The  _Daedalus_  had been in transit when it happened, with some of the original crew on holiday leave. They were undermanned, only carrying extra supplies that the SGC had figured Atlantis needed to fight off the Wraith superhive. Marks didn't know about that, but he  _had_  noticed there was a much larger amount of certain supplies than normal. Not that he'd look deeply into it on his own or sneak in the records, but…

There'd been something about the Colonel when they were leaving Earth, something Marks couldn't put his finger on. When they'd arrived at Atlantis a week after leaving Earth only to hear that the planet they'd left behind was lost…he thought he that had to be it. The event had shaken their foundations and beliefs, but it seemed the Colonel's even more so. Ever since, he'd looked as if he had the weight of the world on his shoulders.

"How long until normal space?" asked Caldwell, staring straight ahead from his captain's chair at the subspace lights passing by through the bridge windows.

Marks looked at the screen in front of him and touched several buttons in sequence. "Twenty minutes, sir."

Caldwell acknowledged with a nod, sinking back in his chair and touching his fingers to his lips in a contemplative manner. For a moment, Marks wondered if it was only the Wraith that was on the man's mind. Or maybe something that was too high above Marks's and everyone else's paygrade to know. Something Caldwell had to carry alone.

Marks wasn't sure if that particular thought eased his mind or not.

* * *

" _Can anyone else suddenly see their feet_ _?_ " Kerrick's voice filtered clear as ice as opposed to earlier through Reese's earpiece radio, partly answering the engineer's question.

" _Seems the storm is breaking up,"_  said Ramirez, his tone nowhere near as cheerful as Reese was when she looked up at the sky.

The dark stormy rain clouds that'd blanketed the sky and hidden the stars from them were slowly drifting apart; showing cracks with only a little hint of light. It was enough for Reese to see that they were at the end of the downward slope, the ground stretching into the viewable distance like a huge open field. Except that this didn't match the feeling of the path they'd taken from the stargate. It'd been much more rocky and bushy. What was in front of them was… a huge nothingness.

Reese stopped, taking the moment to wipe the rain off her goggles. The winds had died a little and the rain was easing up, but it was still difficult to see and hear clearly. She gave the view another look before clicking her radio, "Stevenson. How far off are we from the stargate?"

The two green glowsticks ahead of her halted abruptly, one of them seemingly doing a 360-degree sweep. Several moments passed in which Reese's suspicions only rooted themselves deeper in her consciousness. There was definitely something odd about the picture before her and like the famous line went, she had a bad feeling about this.

Finally, Stevenson replied.  _"The beacon's two miles off at…uh…ten o'clock?"_

" _What's up, Captain?"_  asked Ramirez, coming up immediately to her left.

Reese frowned, ignoring the Marine sergeant's question for now. She needed more info. "Stevenson," she said again. "Could that scanner of yours detect anything other than life signs? Like structures?"

At her side, Ramirez shifted restlessly on his feet. Even though he was quiet, she could feel the tension rolling off him.

" _Yes, I think so. Dr McKay's made a few modifications to the scanners, so I should be able to pick up—"_

"Do it," ordered Reese firmly. "And broaden your range as far as you can. Direct it three o'clock of my position."

Looking at Ramirez, she finally answered his query. "Colonel Sheppard said the city was south of the stargate surrounded by hills. We thought we were going south, but I think we went north-west instead." As she spoke, she pulled out her old-fashioned compass and grimaced at the needle when it stopped. "Damnit!"

The sergeant caught on quickly.  _"So we're just good and lost, eh, Captain?"_

Ramirez's voice was slightly edged, but Reese couldn't blame him. She was frustrated with the idea herself. To get lost on a recon mission – it was the worst that could happen to a soldier, not to mention an officer. They were supposed to be the best suited for the job and they even had the help of Ancient detectors. The one vital thing they lacked was a decent map, but that shouldn't be an excuse. Reese had trusted the Ancient life signs detector to get them through the storm to safe haven in the Avrosian city and she'd failed. That was her responsibility. But with the possibility of the city being so close…she might just have the chance to redeem herself — for the moment.

" _I'm detecting a cluster of what could be structures a few miles off, ma'am. It's difficult to say since the Avrosians aren't known to use alloys in their structures."_ Stevenson sounded uncertain, but Reese couldn't afford to let this pass by. If they had indeed been lost and the city was this close, then going back to the stargate now would be a waste.

Taking another glance at the sky where the stormy clouds were continuing to break up, Reese hefted her P90 into her arms. "Atlantis will have to wait, guys. Let's meet up and head to that cluster."

She adjusted her goggles and moved off towards the other glowsticks, Ramirez close behind. They'd almost reached the others when Stevenson's voice filled her ear once more.

" _Uh…Captain Matthews?"_

"Yes, Doctor?" Reese frowned at the odd tone Stevenson used, instinctively clutching her P90 a little tighter.

" _There's a high level of radiation coming from those structures…"_  A moment passed without any further explanation, nagging uncomfortably at the back of Reese's mind, then the man continued ominously, _"… and I'm still not detecting any life signs."_

* * *

"Run the scan again. Boost the signals if you have to." Caldwell's voice was eerily slow and powerful as he repeated his order to the subdued bridge crew.

It sparked everyone into motion.

From behind the captain's chair, the crew assigned to sensors were working diligently, methodically sending out long-range waves designed to pick up the subspace signal that the two-or-more ZPMs on board the Wraith superhive emitted.

Marks frowned as he worked on his console, the data being transferred to him as soon as the sensor data came in.

It was futile.

"It's gone, sir," Marks said. "We can't pick the ship up on any of the sensors."

He looked up at Caldwell, who pushed himself abruptly out of his chair and strode towards the windows at the front of the bridge. He stood strong, powerful, silhouetted against the shifting lights of the nearby nebula, the superhive's last hiding place. His shoulders were rank, his hands firmly on his hips, but there was something in his stance that had them all holding their breath.

For a second, Marks considered how quickly things changed.

"Let's do another sweep of the solar system, but stay on your toes," Caldwell said finally, without turning. "We're not going back unless we're completely sure they're not just pulling the wool over our eyes."

Marks shared a look with Major Emma Cooper, who sat on the other side of the captain's chair. Neither of them said a word but slowly pulled back to their consoles, listening to the rest of the bridge crew doing the same. Marks was sure they were all thinking the same thing.

The Wraith superhive was loose again.

* * *

" _OpCentre to Colonel Carter. The MALP's through and we've established contact with AR-5."_

Sam touched her earpiece radio in a slight relief. There was only so much of quarrelling over resources, work shifts, deadlines and unbearable tension that she could take in one day, especially with Rodney being behind most of the complaining. Her head was aching with the day's numerous impressions.

"Copy that, Chuck. On my way." She glanced at the various department heads seated around the conference table that looked either offended or curious at the interruption. "We'll have to get back to this later."

"Matthews's team?" asked John, knowing that was the only team off world at the moment.

He seemed to perk up at the thought, which was certainly a change from the sullen and bored look he'd worn throughout the administrative meeting. Not that the latter was anything new since Sam first came to Atlantis. John had never been fond of meetings in general, least of all the administrative kind.

It was good to see that some things never changed no matter what circumstances they found themselves in or forced themselves into.

Back in the bleak reality, Sam nodded briefly, closing her laptop and leaving it behind along with her notes as she went through the opening doors and into the Operations Centre. John quickly got to his feet and followed. He came up behind her as she stood in front of a static monitor, ordering Chuck to patch the signal through from the MALP.

"Captain Matthews, this is Colonel Carter. Do you read?"

The screen flickered then cleared up, showing the face of a goggled and rain-drenched Captain Reese Matthews. Sam noticed Sergeant Ramirez in the background, with Staff Sergeant Kerrick and Dr Stevenson forming up beside him, all of them with green glow sticks attached to their vests. Everything else was covered in rain and darkness.

It took a moment for the sound to come through to the monitor, making it slightly out of synch with the image.  _"Yes, ma'am. I read you loud and clear."_

Frowning, Sam crossed her arms. "What's the situation? Did you manage to contact the Avrosians?"

Matthews stared into the MALP camera, looking morbidly alien in her goggles and cap.  _"…Not exactly. When we came here everything was fogged up and the storm messed with the Ancient detector, so we got off-track for a while. Then it started clearing up, but…"_ It was clear by the expression on the captain's face that something had happened and it was of the sort that made Sam tense up.  _"Ma'am, there's nothing here."_

"What do you mean?" asked Sam immediately, shifting on her feet. Next to her, John jolted closer to the monitor, obviously as disturbed as she was. "Chuck. Run a wide-range scan through the MALP."

In the background, Chuck set to work straight away. One of the projects Sam had assigned the scientists a month ago was upgrading several types of equipment, and the few MALP they had were now capable of doing atmospheric and geographical scan in a three-mile radius. That should put the Avrosian city just within its limits.

On the screen, Matthews shook her head, grimacing.  _"I mean there's nothing at all, nada, zip. The Avrosians are gone. There's a few structures left of their city, but Stevenson picked up high levels of radiation from them so we haven't ventured further."_

"What the hell?" John's outburst brought him forward. Sam sent him a look but he carried on, undeterred, now almost growling at both the screen and her. "A year ago there were nearly five thousand people living on that planet. Teyla talked to them only five days ago on M7X-341!"

Even though she was as riled up as John, Sam ignored him in favour of directing a question at the young captain, seeing as Chuck was still working on the MALP scan. "Did you find any signs as to what could have caused it?"

" _No, ma'am. We're not equipped for it, and we can't get good visuals either."_ Matthews shifted on her feet, swiping water off her goggles to emphasise her point. _"I'm requesting a Jumper so we can run an overhead sweep. It might be they've just moved to a different part of the planet."_

In five days? Sam doubted it, but she let it remain unsaid. Matthews' reasoning was sound and it was expecting too much of them to have been able to run a good scan with the limited equipment they had. Not to mention that the storm wouldn't help in the least.

"Granted," Sam said finally, giving John a nod.

He didn't need to be told twice to get off to the Jumper Bay. Sam knew that even if she'd told him to send someone else, he'd have just defied her and gone himself no matter what. If she could escape one more struggle today, she'd gladly accept it.

"Colonel?"

Chuck's voice immediately drew Sam away from the monitor, coming to his side and looking over his shoulder at his laptop screen. "What've you got?"

Looking at the results from the MALP scan, Sam felt like a stone had been dropped into her stomach.

There truly was no life there. Somehow, the entire city had disappeared and Sam doubted any natural disasters could do this type of damage, especially given the radiation Stevenson had detected.

Sharing a silent look with Chuck, Sam rose to her full height and strode slowly back to the monitor, where Matthews and her team were shifting on their feet restlessly in the rainy dark. "Captain, you and your team are to return to Atlantis."

" _But ma'am—!"_

"That's an order, Captain," Sam said sharply, brooking no further argument.

Though impossible to read behind the goggles and cap, Matthews finally resigned to Sam's authority.  _"Yes, ma'am."_

Only a little relieved she still had some clout, Sam nodded and signalled for Banks to terminate the video connection.

Sam knew soldiers and she knew officers like Matthews. If they could, they'd never abandon a mission. But there was no use in having all of them inside that Jumper, not when all indications told her that all they'd find was a devastated city with zero life signs.

* * *

" _We're just gonna go back, quick as that?"_  Surprisingly, Kerrick's frustrated voice sounded in Reese's ear.

Turning around, Reese saw the rest of the team huddle together, their jagged and rain-soaked features glowing with the blue shimmering of the open wormhole. It was impossible to see their eyes behind the illuminated goggles, but Kerrick's lips were drawn in a snarl, Stevenson was trying to avoid chattering his teeth, and Ramirez was familiarly detached.

No matter how much she agreed with Kerrick, Reese knew she couldn't show it. Not here, not in front of them. And especially not after having been given a direct order from Colonel Carter.

Gripping her P90 tightly, Reese growled into her microphone. "Just like that, Staff Sergeant. Now get going."

Stevenson moved immediately, not needing to be told twice. Ramirez sauntered forward, halting by the MALP and taking up a flanking position.

When Kerrick didn't move, Reese lowered her voice dangerously. "That's  _an order_."

Reacting with a huff, Kerrick passed Reese without another look, standing on the other side of the MALP as it tentatively started to turn around towards the stargate.

Reese slowly counted to ten and followed.

* * *

Looking up as the office door opened, Sam was only partially surprised to see John stepping in and closing it behind him. He didn't move further than three steps, nor did Sam offer him a seat. It was clear on his face that that wasn't what he wanted.

"The Wraith." Sam's lips thinned even as John growled what was on both of their minds.

"The superhive's the only one capable of this," Sam agreed, her eyes hard.

Based on the intensive scans run by the Jumper, John had returned with just fractionally more insight on what'd happened on Avros. Once the storm cleared up a bit, it'd been clear that only a particular area had been devastated by what could only have been an attack. All the buildings of the Avrosian city had been levelled and there was little else but mud and some sort of glassy ground, which Sam had pegged to be the result of severe heat. The stargate had escaped the blast radius, but only barely.

What'd been on all of their minds for the past hour since the Jumper returned was who the hell had the power to wipe out the Avrosians in this manner. There were few in Pegasus who could — that they knew of, anyway — and given the Wraith's attacks the last few weeks in surrounding systems, there was only one logical assumption.

" _Now_  tell me we're just gonna stand by and let the Wraith ravage this galaxy," John said slowly, eyes dark and emotive.

They shared a look and, for the second time today, Sam felt the connection they'd once had, as if they'd finally found something to agree upon.

Just as soon, however, Xiaoyi's words from two weeks ago appeared inside Sam's mind and she sank back in her chair, not responding for several moments. In the corner of her eye, her laptop went into sleep mode, concealing a set of schematics and logs. She stared at the black screen for a while, then at the picture of SG-1 beside it.

She knew that as soon as the words she was about to say escaped her mouth, John's look of encouraged expectation would change, and she'd be taking an irrevocable step in the wrong direction.

But it was either Sam or the city, and she couldn't be selfish.

"We can't."

* * *

Heading down the corridor, Reese didn't care who she bumped into. Not that there was a whole lot of people around. This was one of the less inhabited towers on the West Pier, where most of the soldiers had been bunked together.

Technically, nearly all of the West Pier and South Pier towers were being emptied out, at least with the refugees being relocated and the civilians from Earth being assigned personal quarters instead of shared ones. As someone had said, the higher ups had finally figured out that there actually  _was_  room enough for everyone in this city. It hadn't been said nicely.

Personally, Reese was just glad they were done with the security checkpoints. She wasn't one of the lucky privileged ones who could sneak in the line.

But none of that mattered now. Reese was steaming and she just wanted to get away for a moment so she could blow it off.

It'd been  _her_ mission, dammit! She should've been in that Jumper getting the information first-hand instead of having Ramirez telling her off-handedly in the dinner queue that the Avrosian people had been wiped out by the Wraith. He hadn't even batted an eye, as if it was an everyday newsflash to hear that a civilization had been annihilated!

Reese fisted her hands, growling in the empty corridor. It'd been the same back in the Milky Way during the Ori invasion. The more experienced SGC members had eventually treated new stories of mass-murder and destruction with the same kind of off-handedness that Reese despised. They even had the gall to get  _more_  animated when talking of college ice hockey.

Turning a corner, facing the same ever-lasting Atlantis corridor that looked the same no matter where you went in the city, Reese huffed in frustration. Today was just another proof of how twisted and unbending the world — and its people — had become.

* * *

"The hell you mean 'we can't'?" John took a sudden step forward, his voice low but filled with emotion.

Sam met his dark and dangerous eyes with a bravery she didn't know she possessed, steeling herself for the oncoming fight. There was no way she would win this by the IOA's arguments; they were too feeble. She had to battle him with reason.

"Think about this rationally, John," Sam said imploringly, leaning forward across her desk. "At the moment, we've got no weapons to overpower the superhive, nor shields that can withstand their barrage. And if they somehow manage to find Atlantis, what happened to the Avrosians will happen here." She paused, hardening her expression. "I'm sorry. I wish we could, but we can't."

"We beat the Wraith before," said John matter-of-factly. "And the odds were pretty stacked against us then as well." He stepped forward, leaning down on his fists on top of her desk. He lowered his voice. "Look, I'm not even saying we'll be able to take them all out at once, but at least we've got to  _try_." His eyes darkened.  **"** We owe it to the people we've lost."

Sam had no immediate response. John's proposal was appealing to her on several levels, but the rational part of her was still screaming that enough was enough — they couldn't afford any more losses, especially not with the future that was in store for them.

"It's too risky," Sam said finally, keeping her voice firm. "We can't risk open war. We're outnumbered; we've got limited supplies… Do you want us to eventually fight them with sticks and stones?"

"That's the IOA talking," growled John and pushed off her desk angrily. "You know we can manufacture our own stuff. You even discussed it with the SGC when we were up against the Asurans almost two years ago!"

"That wasn't ammunitions manufacturing I was talking about," said Sam, resisting the urge to pinch the bridge of her nose. As always, the now-familiar headache was pawing its way to the forefront of her head.

"But it can be turned around to it as you well know, Sam." John paced up and down on the other side of the desk, fisting his hands slightly. The use of her name instead of rank made her startle a bit. "Hell, we've got a bunch of the smartest people on Earth in this city. They can figure it out."

Sam sighed, pushing her bangs away from her face. "This isn't about what we're capable of, John. We could probably make Mark 9s and nukes with the right materials and time, but it'd be a moot point if there were no one around to use them. An open war with the Wraith could kill us all."

"Then how about guerrilla tactics?" John asked and while Sam was glad he partly understood her point of view, she was less pleased to have him come up with yet another argument she partly agreed with. He made it sound too reasonable, too easy. She wanted to give in, but…

"I'm sorry, John. I have to say no."

The angry look on John's face as he stared accusingly — and for a moment almost pityingly — at her only pushed the stone of shame deeper into her stomach. Even though his departure moments later would've normally warranted some relief, Sam could only sink into her hands with despair, longing for days when things were so much easier.

* * *

Seeing the desk lamp ignited inside her dim office behind half-shut blinds must've become a familiar sight to those few starting their night shift, Sam mused. She was leaning back in her office chair, staring out through the blinds at the people in the operations centre currently undergoing a shift change.

The graveyard shift, as someone called it, was Sam's alone time. It was when she had a precious moment without IOA representatives wanting to change everything, or repair and administration issues that needed her immediate counsel. There was no one demanding pieces of herself or her time. No one told her with their eyes that she'd changed and not for the better.

The downside, however, was that the nagging thoughts she constantly repressed now found escape freely and indiscriminately. Regret, doubts, guilt… those emotions always dragged her to the end of her sanity, to the point where she waited with bated breath for the final push that would plunge her into the deep.

She was so close now. As she stared at the operations centre, not really seeing the people or her surroundings, she found a set of eyes before her that screamed betrayal and contempt, bringing her to the verge of tears. They were timeless eyes, burned into her memory by the man she'd claimed to care for more than most – and still did. They never gave her rest, never a moment's respite, and it was all she could do not to break down there and then.

Sam closed her eyes violently, brushing a stray tear away from her cheek. With sharp motions, she pulled the chair forward and settled down in front of her PC tablet. There was always work to be done and never enough time to do it. Which only made her think of Major General O'Neill and everything else that was associated with him now: SG-1, Teal'c, Cam, Vala, Earth…

Gritting her teeth, Sam clicked open the folder she'd been working on before John had come earlier and before business had pulled her away from the office for the rest of the day. She input the passwords necessary to break the encryption she'd put on it, pulling up the unfinished plans, files and logs stored in the particular file. Moving the mouse around, she clicked the fifth file in the list of dozens she'd compiled from the various databases available to her.

Two images popped up. One of a very unclear blob of something dark in the sky emitting a strong beam of light towards a planet, the other a sketchy schematic that Rodney and Radek had worked out in the particular incident's aftermath. Sam hadn't been there when it happened, but according to John it'd been a very perilous situation for Atlantis.

Supporting her chin in her palm in thought, already running the scientific possibilities and challenges through her head, Sam found the attached text file Rodney had composed years ago.

' _Asuran Stargate satellite'_

Whatever the IOA was up to, Sam mused, there was no way Atlantis was going to be taken off-guard by the Wraith again. She'd make sure of that.

* * *

 

  
**Next:** "I just want to feel human again."

* * *


	9. Day 74

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In a moment of intermission, Daniel seeks out Sam.
> 
> Minor edit July 2015.

 

* * *

**EIGHT | "I just want to feel human again."**

_Prompt: a time to embrace.  
Music: "A long, long time ago" from 'Pan's Labyrinth', composed by Javier Navarrete_

* * *

**DAY 74**

Waving goodbye to Teyla as she left through the stargate with the rest of her Athosian trading team, Daniel pushed his hands into his pockets and waited for the wormhole to disengage. With a  _whoosh_ , the shimmering light collapsed into itself and the gate room was once more dim with shades of red and yellow from the sinking sun.

Turning on his heel, Daniel tried to ignore the slightly uneasy feeling in his stomach. Although it was always nice to see the Pegasus natives again when they visited, seeing them leave reminded him acutely of when they'd left Atlantis following Sam's relocation orders. He'd been opposed to the decision, but like so many times recently he felt like he couldn't reach her. He knew he wasn't alone. He'd seen the same sentiment in Teyla's eyes earlier when she asked about how everyone in Atlantis was faring.

He hadn't had the heart to tell her that Atlantis was changing.

Pushing the unpleasant thoughts away, Daniel quickly ascended the grand staircase leading up to the Operations Centre. Only a few technicians were on duty and Daniel approached them after seeing that Sam's office was uncharacteristically empty.

Finding Chuck settled comfortably with his feet on the console in front of him, a comic book in hand, Daniel resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He'd seen many military members beginning to loosen up a little in the city, but none ever seemed to have the same guts like the Canadian technician.

"Chuck," Daniel greeted, coming to a halt on the other side of the console. The man lowered his comic book with a slightly bashful look. "Have you seen Sam? She's not in her office."

Looking across his shoulder at the same empty, dimmed room, Chuck shrugged. "I'm not sure. She left a few hours ago. Want me to give her a call?"

Daniel shook his head, shifting on his feet. "No, that's alright, Chuck, thanks. I'll just take a walk and see if I find her."

"You could try the science labs," suggested Chuck, slipping his feet down to the floor but keeping the book in his hands. "She's been going there a lot the past week or so."

"Thanks, I'll check it out," Daniel said gratefully, beginning to turn when another thought crossed his mind. He gave Chuck an amused smile while nodding at the book in his hands. "You might not want Sam to catch you with that."

Chuck grinned sheepishly, flipping the comic book with its face downwards. Next to him, a young male technician named Robert chuckled, nudging Chuck good-heartedly in the shoulder. Daniel repressed a grin and turned towards the metallic staircase leading to the corridors below.

* * *

Entering the inter-connected science labs that were McKay's main territory, Daniel peeked around the corner to see if the man was anywhere near. Not that he disliked the guy, but he could be… _trying_  at times, and Daniel just wanted to find Sam, not get into a whole discussion over it.

The coast was clear, thankfully. A few scientists were roaming the lab, some seated in front of equipment in scrutiny or fiddling with strange-looking gadgets, but no McKay. Presumably, he was off being his charming self. Daniel had heard in the mess hall earlier that there were a few city repairs that hadn't gone well, so the good doctor was probably handling those.

He stepped around the corner and darted between the gadget-overloaded tables towards the nearest scientist, who happened to be a young woman Daniel didn't quite know. Given the things he'd heard people say in the corridors and the mess hall concerning Sam, he was apprehensive about the woman's…friendly side, and opted for the most charming approach. He gave her his best smile as he gained eye contact above her computer screen.

"Hi, I'm looking for Colonel Carter. Have you seen her around?"

The woman, an attractive brunette in an original Atlantis Expedition uniform, shook her head. "No, I'm sorry." Seeing his slightly dejected look, she was quick to add, "I just got here though. I'll ask the others for you."

She smiled amiably, easing a little of Daniel's apprehensions, and then turned in her seat and called out, "Michelle, have you seen Colonel Carter?"

Michelle, a blonde woman dressed in civilian clothing underneath a white coat, gave them a dark, slightly sour look before she caught sight of Daniel and immediately got rid of it.

"Saw her heading towards the supply rooms on the lower level an hour ago," Michelle said in forced indifference. "Might still be there."

She turned quickly back to her work before Daniel could say his thanks, leaving him frowning and slightly unsettled.

This felt much more real than the whispers he'd heard around the city. Seeing the first woman share his awkward, unsettled expression was confirmation that Michelle's brush-off hadn't simply been a figment of his imagination. He wasn't about to be sucked into a fight over opinions, however. That was the IOA's forte.

Daniel gave the woman a smile to diffuse the uncomfortable atmosphere. "Thank you, eh…" he looked at the tag on her Expedition uniform, which read 'Coleman'.

The woman giggled a little and said, "Mia."

"Well, thank you… _Mia_."

"You're welcome, Dr Jackson."

Backtracking to the entrance and halting in the open doorway, Daniel sent a fleeting look across his shoulder at the coat-clad Michelle, who was hunched together with a man dressed similarly. He recognised the man as being a regular in Dr Lee's lab at the SGC for many years. The woman, however, must have been a recent addition. They were speaking hushed between themselves and the almost scowling look Michelle wore sent a clenching feeling into Daniel's stomach.

Mia still smiled at him, though, and he guessed that should be good enough for now. Still, as Daniel left the science labs behind for the lower levels, he couldn't control the urge that kept him shooting glances over his shoulder at the silent, empty corridor. A divide was emerging and he had a bad feeling about its consequences.

* * *

"They nearly wouldn't let me in here, you know. I had to say you called me down on important business."

Sam turned around at Daniel's voice, her fingers clenching around the item in her hands. Standing just inside the open doorway separating the two connected supply rooms on this level, Daniel gave her the familiar look that promised Sam there was no getting out of this. She didn't bother to ask how he had found her. The past had shown her that he had his ways.

Hands in his pockets, Daniel entered the room and looked around at the stacks of containers neatly placed along the walls. "So what's so valuable in here that you need guards outside the doors? I thought it was just a minor supply room. Uniforms and such."

Turning back to the open container behind her, Sam placed the item in her hands carefully back inside its padded walls. She knew there was no point skirting the truth now. The secret was out. Besides, she knew he'd keep it to himself if she asked him to.

Sam turned back fully towards Daniel, who was now picking up a small box from one of the many shelves and studying it with familiar scrunched-up scrutiny. "It's not exactly a supply room… You could say there's a lot of…one of a kind… items in here." Daniel gave her an inquisitive look, still holding the box between his hands. Taking a restless step forward, Sam wrung her hands. "It's things from Earth. Kept in storage at the SGC in the eventuality that something bad happened and we had to evacuate completely."

_Just one of those eventualities you never imagined would actually happen, and yet here we are…_

"From— Really?" A dumbfounded look crossed Daniel's face and he gave the silvery box another glance, tracing the edge of the lid towards the lock. "What kind of things?"

Sam sighed, coming to a halt next to a large container marked with a binary number. "Random stuff, really, but hand-picked. Not military or science-related, just…"

Raising her hand to rest on the container, Sam looked mesmerised at the imprinted number. By the  _click_  of an opened lock, Daniel drew her attention to the small box he'd played with.

"…things from…home?" he asked, giving her a mixed expression of amusement and disbelief. "I never would've thought a Rubik's Cube needed a 24-7 guard." He picked the colourful object out of its box, raising his eyebrow in familiar banter.

But instead of scoffing or smiling at his tease, Sam could only stare fixedly at the cube in Daniel's hands. A memory flash told her she'd once picked it apart to see how it worked. Afterwards, she tried to glue it back together without particular success. She'd never been good at such mundane tasks.

"Sam…?"

Daniel was staring at her with a slightly worried air around him. She noticed she'd crossed her arms and were gripping the opposite elbow in a white-knuckled grasp. Unclenching her fingers, she relaxed her arms. It was too late, though. Daniel had noticed.

He replaced the Rubik's Cube back in its box and put it back on the shelf where he'd found it. When he turned back to Sam, she was leaning against a large container, her chin down and eyes closed.

Daniel sighed, but he seemed so far away; distant and disconnected, as if he was simply a voice in the darkness. "Sam, what's going on?"

Sam didn't know what to answer. The whispering walls seemed to push in on her, but she was like icy steel, pushing them back as far away from her as she could. They couldn't touch her, nor could the voices that'd begun to linger in her wake as she passed.

Outside her consciousness, Daniel's voice was speaking again, but he was still so far-off. "You've been avoiding me…"

Sam opened her eyes, looking up into the concerned brown eyes of her friend. It'd been twelve years since she had met him and most of the others in her SG-1 photograph. More than twelve years spent expanding the borders of knowledge and science of what was possible. Making friends, making enemies. Challenging the unknown and hoping they'd come out the other end in one piece.

And now… Around them was the surviving legacy of Earth. This room, Atlantis, the people… They'd been through so much during those years and now they were the only ones left.

And she couldn't feel a damn thing.

* * *

It pained him to see her blue eyes shimmering in the middle of a stony expression. Sam was struggling and Daniel hated to see her like that.

"Talk to me, Sam." He knew he was pleading, but he had to reach her somehow, otherwise she'd be lost down a dangerous path he couldn't follow.

Sam pursed her lips, withdrawing her eyes and turning around towards the dark corners of the supply room. Her voice was like steel, detached in the way that'd become so familiar in the past two months. "What do you want from me, Daniel?"

Daniel sighed, knowing it would be a battle and a difficult one at that. "I just want you to talk to me again, Sam." He paused, eyeing her sadly. "I miss you. I miss my friend."

Sam didn't reply. She moved forward to where the container she'd been perusing earlier was still open. Across her shoulder, he could see an assortment of items he wouldn't have found out of place in a primary school. Paint, paper, boxes of brushes… The rest was obscured as Sam closed the lid and slid the lock in place. Daniel still had many questions about this place, about these boxes, but they'd have to wait.

"Sam…"

She halted, her head drooping towards the container and her shoulders slumping slightly.

" _I'm sorry…"_  Her voice was low, almost a whisper. Daniel's heart went out to her, his previous annoyance with her stubbornness melting into nothing. _"I just… I can't… I'm…"_

She paused with a sharp intake of breath, forcing herself to straighten up a little more.  _"_ I just… I can't  _feel_  anything. I'm…"

She drifted off, leaving the sentence incomplete, but Daniel suddenly understood more than her words could say. In war, innocence was among the first things to go. The second was you.

"Oh, Sam…" Daniel sighed softly.

Sam didn't turn around, but the hitch in her voice was enough for Daniel to close the gap between them and carefully touch her shoulder. She tried to brush him off, and rather forcibly. Nevertheless, she'd shown her true colours now. Daniel wasn't about to give up and leave her on her own, not now. He'd promised to stand by her no matter what.

Taking hold of her elbow, Daniel gently nudged Sam around and into his arms. She protested weakly, but Daniel held on until she finally relaxed and sank almost tiredly into his embrace. Her arms wound around him, fingers gripping him by the fabric of his jacket. Although they dug slightly into his back, Daniel didn't care. He just hugged her tighter, nuzzling her mop of blonde hair.

Sam began to shiver, mumbling into his shoulder, "…' _m cold._ "

Stroking her tense, trembling back comfortingly, Daniel shushed her softly. "I'm here, Sam… I'm not gonna go away."

It must have been the right words. Sam sank further into the crook of his neck, her body more relaxed. In some way, she even felt lighter.

Thinking back on what he'd heard and seen around the city in the past few weeks, however, Daniel could only wonder how long that'd last.

* * *

 

  
**Next:** "Let's be friends."

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of the things I've learned in life are that people deal with grief in different ways (or don't deal at all), and for many it lingers for years and causes them to do things they wouldn't normally do. This is a theme I'm exploring in this story. I hope to do the characters justice, because this story is mostly about them and not simply the plot.


	10. Day 81

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Wraith have unexpectedly stopped their blitz attacks on Pegasus planets, but John has bigger concerns on his mind as he's given command of Atlantis for a few days while Sam visits the Kadarian settlement. Something unsettling is going on...

* * *

**NINE | "Let's be friends."**

_Prompt: a time to plant_

* * *

**DAY 81**

Standing in the shadows on a tucked away catwalk outside the conference room, Coolidge couldn't keep his thoughts to himself.

"Look at her," he spoke lowly, his eyes fixed on the blonde woman below in the gate room who moved forward to greet the trading party from one of the refugee planets. "All smiles."

Touching the railing beside him, Shen Xiaoyi observed the events below with a calculated eye. Colonel Carter was indeed more cheerful than usual, greeting the leader of the Kadarian trading party with a bright smile and a firm handshake. A bit unusual given the woman's lack of social presence the past month. Still… Shen could hear the underlying disdain in Coolidge's voice and knew what he was actually thinking.

"Do  _not_  underestimate her, James," Shen told her colleague without looking at him. "Despite her decisions in the past months, we mustn't forget that she's managed to gain command of Earth's largest and most valuable off-world base. It's not exactly a feat many share."

"Connections," Coolidge said in a huff, leaning against the railing. "But they can't help her now. She's on her own."

His tone changed to a slightly darker one and Shen shifted uncomfortably, looking around to make sure no one had heard. Seeing only the operations technicians far off in the vicinity, Shen looked back to see Coolidge's hands clenched around the railing until his knuckles whitened. He remained silent, however, leaving his issues unspoken. Pleased with that, she turned back to gaze at the gate room below.

Daniel Jackson and Colonel Sheppard had both extended their greetings, the former now gesturing towards the grand staircase and the conference room. As the Kadarian leader took the lead along with Dr Jackson and Carter, Colonel Sheppard stayed back to help the rest of the Kadarians with the baskets of fruits and assorted food that they'd brought.

Shen was already familiar with the purpose of this visit. Each week, several refugee worlds came with what surplus food they'd collected in return for medical help and supplies if necessary. Dr Keller was by now probably preparing to join the party back to their planet, where apparently an indigenous infection had made almost half the children sick.

Apparently reading her mind, Coolidge spoke up again in a low, ominous voice, "She's spending a lot of our valuable resources on these people…" He followed the trio moving into the conference room with a grim look. "This isn't Earth."

Shen agreed, but she would get nowhere saying so to Atlantis' commander. Not to mention that it'd be political suicide to advocate against humanitarian help. The people on Atlantis still had strong feelings about their obligations, no matter what they thought of their current leadership. Granted, it wasn't like Atlantis was bleeding dry immediately, but still…

"Patience, James," Shen said coolly, releasing her grip on the railing and taking a step back. "Colonel Carter may be a dangerous opponent, but even more so to herself." Giving Coolidge a tight smile, she continued, "I think you'll find that everything will be sorted out in the end."

A frown crossed Coolidge's face. She could almost see how the wheels turned in his head, trying to work out the true meaning behind her words. Shen didn't particular care if he worked it out or not. Things were already set into motion and it was too late to stop it.

* * *

"Life has been treating us well on New Kadara, Colonel Carter." Asok, the leader of the Kadarian settlement, smiled at her from across the table. He was an elderly man of small stature and always wore an amicable expression the times Sam had met him. "We have nothing to complain about. We have water, food, shelter and safety from the Wraith. Dr Keller has assured me all of the children will be healthy again."

"That's good to hear," said Sam, inwardly relieved that  _finally_ , someone was pleased. Ironically, it proved to be most of the Pegasus natives that'd visited Atlantis the past week with their trading goods. Next to her, Daniel gave her a knowing look. Pushing that aside, she asked, "How are you coming along with the dam? Do you need any help?"

Asok shook his head in negative, saying, "You have already done more than we could ever hope for, Colonel. It is time we do the work ourselves." Apparently reading more into her silence than Sam was aware of herself, the white-haired, good-natured man met her hesitant look with a twinkle in his eye. "Do not worry so much, Colonel. My people are strong and stubborn; they can handle a bit of hard work."

Catching herself feeling stupid for even once considering assigning a few engineers to help, Sam smiled sheepishly. She'd become so used to sending the engineers whenever the settlers experienced trouble in their newly founded villages. "I'm sure they can, Asok. If you need anything, however… Don't hesitate to let us know."

"I will," said Asok, folding his hands peacefully on top of the table. "And if there is anything we can do for  _you_  or your people, Colonel, we would be most happy to do so. The Kadarian regard our allies highly, but our friendships even higher."

Seemingly jumping at the chance, Daniel sat forward in his chair. "There was one thing, Asok, if I may…" The elderly man nodded, gesturing Daniel to continue. "Since Dr Keller is already accompanying you back to the planet, I would like to join her. I'd like to know more about your people. In fact… _both_ Colonel Carter and I would."

Startled, Sam swirled around on Daniel with a poorly hidden accusing look, but he was pointedly staring at the Kadarian leader.

Asok glanced briefly between the two of them before saying with a hidden smile, "It would be an honour to have you visit us."

"Great!" said Daniel enthusiastically, giving Sam an innocent look. "Wouldn't you say so,  _Sam_?"

Next to him, Asok sported a twinkle that seemed far too similar to Daniel's, giving Sam the distinct feeling that she'd been set up.

Promising a nasty vengeance for Daniel later, Sam could only smile tightly at both men and nod her assent.

* * *

"You're going  _where_?" John didn't know if he had heard Sam correctly. There  _was_ quite a bit of background noise with the first group of Marines and Ronon training in the gym behind him. He touched the radio earpiece and pushed it a little further into his ear.

" _I'll be joining Daniel and Jennifer to the Kadarian settlement. That leaves you in charge here for a couple of days."_

Already caught off guard, John couldn't stop a sliver of annoyance slipping into his voice. " _'Days'_? I gotta lead the drills for the rest of the week; I can't go running off to a bunch of meetings while these guys are pounding each other."

A particular loud, painful yell sounded from the gym, emphasizing John's point. He went back to the doorway to check everything was all right. Inside, three Marines were battling each other in hand-to-hand with Ronon as supervisor. It'd reached the point where one of the guys had begun to bleed from a cut on the eyebrow. Instinct told him to get in there and break it up, but Ronon was already stepping in and taking control with a silent intensity that only the Satedan possessed.

The separated, panting soldiers held John's attention for a moment longer until he realised he'd missed most of what Sam's muffled voice had said.

"Woah, woah, Sam," John interrupted her, the name slipping past his lips before he could stop himself. "Back up a bit. I didn't catch that. Jarhead moment."

He could hear the sharp silence he'd begun to associate with her annoyance, but he couldn't care about that now.

 _"…I said I've rescheduled most of the meetings."_ Sam's voice was terse. _"You've only got to meet up with the IOA remnant in your office at 15.00 today. I've sent the details to your inbox."_

Reining in a groan, John stopped pacing and stared down the empty hallway. The gym was alive with grunts and scuffles again, distracting him from the conversation with Sam. He tried to clear his mind, to find some tranquil place so he could get the answers he wanted without causing further distance. It was hard.

Eventually, John lowered his voice and said, "You coulda told me earlier."

"…  _I didn't know,"_  said Sam, her voice a little softer but still obviously tense. The image of her pinching the bridge of her nose, eyes closed, popped into John's head. He quickly pushed it away; it simply brought back too many memories. " _Daniel roped me into it in front of Asok. I couldn't really say no."_

Still annoyed at the sudden upheaval of his schedules, John glanced at the gym behind him. He'd hoped to be there to supervise all of the drills personally, since every solider currently on Atlantis was going to have their turn and he wanted to feel them out.

Due to the cut-back of ordinary missions the past two months, as well as the chaos dominating that time, he'd lost touch with many of the military under his command. They'd simply fallen off the radar most of the time, and John had been too busy with the Wraith and the issues with internal security and the refugees to follow up on all of them. It'd all hit very close to home for him when two soldiers and three civilian scientists had suddenly gotten into a brawl in the mess hall two days ago. It'd taken two security teams and a major headache before John got the situation under control and dealt with, and now he was resolved to change the status quo.

But he couldn't mess with diplomatic ties on the basis that Sam had left him high and dry. They needed the Pegasus natives just as much as the natives needed Atlantis, especially now that the Wraith superhive had suddenly stopped its blitz attacks and seemingly disappeared underground. John knew Todd's people were just biding their time, however, and he was itching to get out there, but that option was out. For now, they needed information and the natives were the best people to gather it for them without attracting attention, and to do that Atlantis needed them on their side.

"Alright," John grumbled finally. Feeling the need to lighten up a little lest he fall into one of the dark holes associated with Sam these days, John forced a hint of perkiness into his voice. "Say hi to Reika for me, would ya? Tell her I'll drop by next time."

Reika was one of the kids John had gotten to know while the Pegasus natives had been refugees in Atlantis. Staying in touch with them had helped him stay sane throughout the nightmares that had he and Atlantis both had been doled out for last year's Christmas present. Thinking about the kids now even seemed to marginally improve his mood.

"… _I will. Carter out."_

As abruptly as the radio transmission had come it ended, leaving John standing silently in the hall outside the gym, listening tensely to the muffled sounds of soldiers going through their hand-to-hand combat exercises.

* * *

Trudging in the middle of the small convoy, Sam caught herself repeatedly adjusting her gnawing backpack and half-wishing they'd taken a Jumper despite the fact that it would've been impossible to get it out of the forest the stargate was located in. She was almost out of breath as they climbed a steep hill to reach the Kadarian settlement, which was tucked into a lush valley some four hours away from the stargate at a brisk pace. She knew that somewhere behind, Daniel and Jennifer were making up the rear along with a few sympathising Kadarians. Daniel was still not fully recovered from his Milky Way injuries, but he stubbornly insisted upon coming anyway.

Gritting her teeth for each climbing step, Sam was increasingly annoyed at each of her burning muscles, complaining against months of disuse. This was not her; she never used to have problems with a little physical exertion. She used to go on daylong treks with 30kgs backpacks or more, often followed by a hasty retreat to the planet's stargate, guns firing, without her body complaining… much.

Finding herself forced to take another breather, Sam let herself be passed by the young Kadarians carrying Jennifer's supplies before slumping a little forward. She pulled out her canteen and gulped down the cool water hurriedly, listening to the pounding of her blood in her ears. Once she had her breath under control, she pushed a few loose strands of hair aside from her sticky face and turned to scout for Daniel and Jennifer. They were some twenty feet down the slope, Daniel visibly shifting his weight quickly off his injured foot. Jennifer was close by, ready to support him if needed.

"You alright?" Sam asked him when they finally reached her, the Kadarians already far up ahead along the winding path up the rocky hillside.

Panting, Daniel accepted Sam's canteen gratefully. "I've been better," he admitted after a few gulps.

"You shouldn't be forcing yourself," said Jennifer, obviously in marginally better shape than either Sam or Daniel. She adjusted her backpack a little, but otherwise didn't seem bothered by the exertion. "If you'd asked, I'd never have let you go off-world so early."

"Good thing I didn't ask then," said Daniel smartly, handing the canteen back to Sam. "Seriously, I'm fine. Stop worrying."

"Who says I'm worried?" asked Sam obviously, raising an eyebrow. Jennifer simply rolled her eyes in exasperation. "At least let me take some of that weight off your shoulders."

"No way," objected Daniel, taking a step away from them. "You've got enough already. Besides, it's not that much. Just a few books and some clothes. Tebor took the rest." Tebor was one of the young male Kadarians that'd made Daniel's acquaintance on a previous visit to Atlantis. "I should be able to carry that, at least."

Sam rolled her eyes, not exactly surprised by Daniel's stubbornness. She hitched up her backpack with a slight grimace. "Suit yourself. We should get going, though, otherwise the Kadarians are gonna be miles ahead."

"Aren't they already?" muttered Jennifer gently.

* * *

In hindsight, John had expected the shit to finally hit the fan, but he hadn't expected it so soon.

Upon entering the gym after lunch, where the third group of soldiers of the day were supposed to meet for their hand-to hand training, John was immediately aware of the sounds of a serious scuffle going on.

"What the hell…?"

He shared a look with Ronon, who'd walked with him from the mess hall and now wore a dark, knowing look. The Satedan reacted instantly, striding quickly forward towards the crowd that had gathered at one side of the gym. Towering a head above the rest, he pushed the crowd aside with sheer presence, with John following closely behind.

They emerged on the other side just as two snarling Air Force sergeants threw themselves at the other without repentance. Blood had already spilled from small cuts on their faces, their bare skin red and swelling from where hard knuckles had hit. John was stunned by the malevolent and crazy grimace upon their faces, and felt his head blood soar with adrenaline.

"Break it up!" he shouted at the two of them, stepping into the ring immediately.

The two men were in their own frenzied world, however, oblivious to anything else happening. John didn't need to look at Ronon before deciding his second approach.

Flexing his muscles, Ronon threw himself into the midst, pulling one of the sergeants by his shoulders and flinging him heavily in John's direction. The man stumbled into John with force, grunting loudly, but before John could get the man under control, he'd regained his balance and spun around sending a hard punch straight into John's left side. The punch threw him off-balance with a pained grimace and he narrowly dodged a second punch.

Now seriously pissed off, John instinctually spun around himself and delivered one of his own right-hand blows into the man's stomach. It was meant as a debilitating hit but the sergeant barely grunted, gritting his teeth and glaring up at John with unprecedented rage. Roaring, he lunged at him, but this time John was prepared. Side-stepping the punch, he hooked his foot around the sergeant's and flipped him unto the ground while using his hands to control his arms and head. Acting quickly, John got down and locked the man's arms behind his back by his wrists.

Once he was sure the man was unable to get out of it, he gritted out, "Stow it, _Sergeant!"_

"Fuck you, _sir!"_  The man, who John now recognised as Sergeant Nelson of the former SGC, continued to struggle, despite the persistent and most likely painful wristlock John had him in.

"You did  _not_  just say that," growled John dangerously, pulling Nelson's wrist a little further and feeling the man's arm muscles tighten in protest at the angle. Nelson groaned in pain, but John held it tight. "Get a hold of yourself, Sergeant. That's an orderand I _ain't_  saying it twice!"

Finally, the man ceased to resist and John loosened his grip. Once assured the man was calm, John got to his feet and left Nelson lying on the ground groaning. He turned towards Ronon and the second sergeant, who he saw was Ramirez, bloodied and bruised but otherwise seemingly in control of his senses. John's eyes narrowed.

"Anyone wanna tell me  _what the hell happened_?" John gave Ramirez a particularly pointed stare, but the man tilted his chin defiantly and didn't say a word. Neither did anyone else in the crowd, not even when faced with Ronon's dangerously threatening stare, and John's anger flared at the conspiracy of silence facing him. He'd often been part of it, but he'd never been on this side of it before.

Behind him, Nelson got slowly to his feet and his eyes locked with Ramirez. The tension could be cut with a knife. Fed up with it all, John planted himself straight between them with dangerous looks at either of them.

"That's  _enough_. Last warning." He pointed specifically at each of them. Ronon stepped forward, arms crossed, sending silent dark looks of his own.

Once it was clear neither of the sergeants were launching into another fight immediately, John turned to one of the Airmen in the crowd. "Christenson, get security up here. I want 'em here yesterday. Everyone else get the hell out of here. Show's over."

He gave the crowd a hard, authoritative look until they slowly began to turn and filter out of the gym.

Turning back to Nelson and Ramirez, John gritted his teeth, speaking in a controlled, uncompromising voice, "You two are gonna spend the night in the brig and you're gonna  _cool off._ I'll deal with you later."

Neither of the sergeants objected, remaining in their positions with now almost uncaring expressions. Although he was slightly ticked off by their defiance, John held back further retort and maintained the same guarding position as Ronon, rubbing his side with a grimace.

* * *

Having finally reached the Kadarian settlement, Sam sank down on a proffered and welcomed bench in the middle of the assorted tents and under-construction buildings. Uncapping her canteen, she gulped the rest of the cool water with relish, as well as pouring some of it over her head.

It was a hot day, but the trek over hills and through lush forests had taken an extra toll on her. Her muscles were still burning and she was beyond the point where she was consciously aware that people around her didn't seem as exhausted as her. Once she caught her breath, however, she looked up to find Asok settled comfortably on a log opposite of her, his eyes kind but knowing.

Now acutely conscious of her hair being plastered to her head, as well as the sweat trickling down her neck and making her clothes stick to her skin, Sam found herself straightening despite her muscles complaining. If anything, it only made Asok's hint of a smile that much more annoying. At least he didn't comment on the obvious, for which Sam was grateful.

"Now that we've reached the goal of our journey, I offer you a proper welcome to our village, Colonel Carter," Asok said, brushing a little dust off his clothes. "We may not be many, but you will find that our hearts and homes have plenty of room." He put his hands together in what Sam had come to learn was the traditional greeting. "May you always find rest and ease from the road, and peace from the Wraith."

As always when reminded of the threat they'd all been under, and still  _were_  in most respects, Sam's annoyance trickled away and was replaced with a serious, depressing mood. No matter how long the Wraith held on to this apparent break they were on, Sam knew they'd be back. The Wraith would never give up Atlantis. Their cat-and-mouse chase and the consequent blitz attacks on former Pegasus allies of Atlantis had proven that. The temptation of a planet and a new galaxy housing billions of humans… it had to be too hard to resist.

What struck Sam most keenly about Asok's features at the moment was not fear or resignation of being considered the Wraith's livestock, however, but rather a ray of hope. Asok, like many of the Pegasus settlers Sam had met in the past months, was still optimistic that the Wraith couldn't hurt them, despite all that'd happened in the past five years.

Sam couldn't help but respect that stoic heartfelt belief, as well as feel oddly comforted by it. She slumped a little from her tense posture, drawing a deep breath. Feeling too much of a hypocrite to attempt the Kadarian greeting, though, Sam settled for a smiling nod.

"I appreciate that, Asok, and please call me Sam."

Asok's expression brightened as he rested his hands in his lap, "Sam… It is a beautiful name. Does it have a meaning on your world?"

Opening the zipper of her Expedition jacket to let some air in to her hot skin, Sam froze in mid-action. While Earth was never far away from her mind, Asok's question reminded her of the people who'd given her her name. Surprised by the sudden lump in her throat, she withdrew her eyes and focused on completing the unzipping.

"Yes," Sam said a bit thickly. "Most names on Earth do… I'm not sure what my name in particular means, though. Daniel might be the wiser guy to ask."

Continuing to avoid eye contact, Sam was slightly surprised when Asok said gently, "Please, forgive an old man his curiosity." Sam looked up to see him raise his palms ruefully. "At my age, it seems, I tend to believe the youth are as interested in the small things as me. I forget there are other, more important things on your minds, as it should be."

He smiled kindly and embarrassedly, and for reasons Sam couldn't explain he lulled her into a comfortable sense of security; she couldn't help but be drawn into his deep, calm eyes.

"Grandfather!" A girl swiftly catapulting into Asok's right side broke the spell instantly, making Sam blink for a moment. She was about six or seven with wild brown curls that reminded Sam of someone she'd met in her past. Someone surrounded by the haze of a dream…or was it a colourful wisp of clouds? Sam looked at her mesmerised.

"Ah, Reika," greeted Asok happily, resting his hand on the girl's back and pulling her a little closer. "I wondered when you would show up." He winked knowingly at Sam above the girl's head, and then gestured for Reika to turn around. "I would like you to meet a very special woman. This is Sam. She will be staying here for a few days while Jennifer helps your brother get well."

Smiling, Sam gave Reika a small, slightly awkward wave. "Hi."

The girl shyly buried her face in Asok's neck, having to be gently nudged by the old man before tipping her head up with a small smile. The action vanquished some of Sam's embarrassment and she gave Reika her friendliest grin.

"John's told me about you," Sam said gently, watching as the name registered immediately with the young girl. "He was sorry he couldn't see you today, but promised to visit soon."

Reika's expression fell slightly and Sam was at once conscious of the fact that John must've had a particular impact on the girl since he met her on Atlantis. It sent a pang of nostalgia through her, remembering the controlled chaos that'd gone on before the SGC evacuation order came through.

They'd started to evacuate planets in the Wraith superhive's path to Atlantis only weeks before Christmas, and Sam had been busy handling the administrative side of things. It'd been John who interacted with the refugees, getting to know them as they were assigned quarters. He'd told Sam about Reika and the other kids one night they spent on the balcony, taking a breather before turning in. It'd been full moon, the sea tranquil and shimmering in silver, and John had taken her hand and…

The image of John's smiling dark eyes assaulted her and Sam quickly pushed it away to the darkest corners of her mind.

Whether Asok noticed the change of mood Sam couldn't tell, but the elder man drew Reika close and whispered something in her ear. Feeling like a third wheel in the two Kadarians' hushed conversation, Sam turned her attention to the tents and buildings surrounding her.

Kadarians of all ages were milling about, some watching her curiously, others busy with their routines. Several children were playing some sort of game with a bundle of cloth around what seemed to be the cooking area — Daniel had told her the Kadarians were a communal people — and they drew Sam's attention for several moments until Asok coughed lightly.

A little embarrassed, Sam returned her gaze to Reika and the Kadarian leader. Asok looked to Sam with a twinkle in his eyes, gesturing to the young girl as he spoke. "If you do not have other plans, Sam, Reika wishes to show you our village. She is our best guide," he added sincerely.

The praise seemed to awaken some pride in the previously shy girl, and Reika moved forward to grasp Sam's hand silently, prompting a barely concealed chuckle from her.

_Well, when in Rome…_

"I'd be honoured," Sam said courteously and let herself be pulled to her feet before pausing. She turned to Asok. "When the others arrive…"

"I'll tell them where you are," said Asok with a contained smile before motioning towards their surroundings. "Please enjoy your tour, Colonel. There is no hurry."

Nodding gratefully, Sam looked down at her little guide, who only reached her thigh. She couldn't help but smile warmly at the large, brown eyes staring half-shyly and half-curiously at her. "Lead on, skipper."

* * *

Ten minutes after dismissing the third martial arts class, security finally arrived and John watched them escort Ramirez and Nelson around the corner of the hall with an unsettled feeling in his stomach. Was this what they'd come to? Whacking at each other in the mess hall and the gym? Throwing punches uncaringly at senior officers?

Frustrated with the responding silence, John turned and re-entered the gym. As expected, Ronon was giving him the look that said he knew it all.

"What?" John grumbled. He strode towards the equipment that lay around and began to clean it up. "You gonna say 'I told you so', big guy?"

Ronon simply stood in the middle of the room, his arms relaxed at his sides but his voice low. "They're restless."

"Y'know, that's  _practically_  'I told you so'," said John darkly, chucking the workout mat in his hands towards the similar stack in a corner. Noticing his aggressiveness, John paused and sighed, continuing in a calmer but strained tone. "I know they are, but what the hell am I supposed to do? I've already got 'em running and training five days a week when there's not the occasional recon or trade mission."

Ronon's stare told him exactly what he  _could_  do, since they'd talked about this several weeks before. It only made John groan further as he picked up another mat.

"I can't send them all off-world to fight the Wraith. The boss says no."

"But you don't agree." Ronon's statement was simple but, as always, said more than John expected. He'd never told Ronon about what happened in Sam's office after the attack on Avros, feeling it was none of other people's business, but he should probably not be surprised Ronon had eventually figured it out. The guy could give Mace Windu a run for his money.

A dark look crossed John's face as he shut down the frustration the memory of Avros and Sam's office brought.

"No, I don't," said John, turning around and meeting Ronon's levelled stare.

He knew that Ronon was itching to get cracking at fighting the Wraith again and John was no better. He wanted to make the Wraith pay for all the people they'd killed in the last three months, both Pegasus natives and…and the people now buried in foreign fields. But that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. Even if Sam had said 'yes' to active resistance, Atlantis wasn't ready. John didn't even have to look at the status reports from the various departments to recognise that now.

"I didn't agree with her, but that's neither here nor there," John continued lowly, putting the last of the green workout mats on top of the stack. He took a breath before turning around to face the Satedan. "The simple fact is we've got our own people getting into fist fights now and there's no easy fix. Chucking them at the Wraith won't solve the problem."

It was clear by Ronon's expression that he didn't agree, but he said nothing, simply holding John's levelled stare. Nevertheless, John had the distinct feeling that before all this was over, Ronon was going to unrepentantly tell him 'I told you so' again. And when that time came, John would be much more tempted to make a different choice no matter the consequences.

It couldn't go on like this.

* * *

After the tour with Reika, who'd slowly come out of her shell and turned out to be rather enthusiastic and energetic with lots of questions, Sam found herself drifting around the village.

The tents and half-finished buildings were a testimony to the situation of the Kadarians, the situation Sam had forced them into, and she couldn't help the uneasy feeling settling in her stomach. It made her restless and she walked about, trying to figure out what she was supposed to do. Jennifer was off treating the sick kids and Daniel was seated with Asok and several other Kadarians in deep conversation about culture and history. Now that he was off his feet, he seemed to be having a great time.

Emerging between two tents to an open area where several Kadarian women were milling around a well, Sam halted. The women were laughing and smiling as they prepared various foods, washed clothes in a wooden tub, or drew water from the well. Some of them were even singing, the words unfamiliar to Sam. They seemed happy, without complaint, just as Asok had said in the meeting this morning.

Sam could only watch them silently, biting her lip.

In-between the women, several children – including Reika – were running about, playing a form of tag that involved a cloth being thrown by the one who was 'it'. Seeing the children sent a pang through Sam. The only times she'd run into them on Atlantis had been either Teyla's son Torren before the Athosians relocated or the rare occasions she'd been to visit the refugees. Now… Atlantis was void of children. There were just adults, who hardly ever ran around playing tag with the carefree attitude these Kadarian children possessed.

Being too caught up in the game, one of the children didn't see where she was going and ran smack into an unprepared Sam.

"Ouf!" Quickly catching her balance, as well as the girl before she tipped over, Sam straightened them both. "Are you alright?" she asked the girl, about ten, worriedly. "Did you hurt yourself?"

The girl looked at first confused and then a little sceptical, before finally deciding Sam wasn't as scary as she first thought. "No. Who're you?"

Now smiling, Sam kneeled down so she was at the same height as the girl. "I'm Sam. What's your name?"

"Miral." The girl smiled shyly, her hand twisting in her dirt and grass-specked skirt.

"Sam!" Reika came bundling to them, her face flushed from the game. "Play with us!"

Sam was stunned for a moment, not expecting the invitation. She looked up at the Kadarian women, who watched with great interest and smiles, and was a bit reserved. "I dunno…"

"Please?" asked Reika, shortly joined by Miral. Their wonderfully childish expressions finally touched something in Sam and she was convinced.

"Okay," Sam replied with a grin, standing up.

The girls cheered and it hadn't been two seconds before the bundle of cloth had been thrown straight into Sam's chest by some of the other gathering kids, effectively tagging her. She picked it up to the glee of the now fleeing children.

* * *

Moving briskly through the hallways on his way from the brig, John resisted the urge to groan at the lingering ache in his side. Sergeant Nelson obviously knew how to pack a punch and John had been unprepared. The entire issue weighed on his mind, frustrating him. When Sam got back, he'd have to take it up with her and see what they could do. This couldn't go any further.

" _Xiaoyi to Colonel Sheppard."_

For a moment, John was confused as to why  _she_  was calling him, then memory filtered back to him and he cursed beneath his breath. This day was only getting worse.

"Yeah?" he replied sharply on his radio.

" _I believe we had a meeting scheduled at 3 o'clock,"_  Xiaoyi continued formally, but with a slight edge in her tone.

John could picture the annoyed look upon her face seeing as it was now fifteen past, but frankly, he couldn't care less at the moment. He had bigger troubles on his mind than the petty concerns of the IOA remnant. Even so, this was a necessary evil he couldn't escape.

"I'm on my way," John said brusquely, terminating the connection as he turned on the spot and doubled back to the nearest transporter.

Eight minutes later he was outside his office, where both Xiaoyi and Coolidge were waiting. Again, John noticed that Woolsey was nowhere to be seen, reminding him ominously of what politics could do to those going against the grain. The two IOA members looked equally offended and indifferent, presumably because he was running late, but all John could think of were how pleased he was that he now routinely locked his door. Otherwise he'd wonder what dirty tricks either of them had stooped to when faced with the open door of a senior Expedition member.

It also gave him the upper hand, which he needed.

"Hope you haven't been waiting long," John found himself saying dryly as he input his code, feeling no small sense of satisfaction at the frustrated puff coming from the baldy-head. The door opened and John stepped inside, gesturing half-heartedly and sarcastically for the others to enter, "Come on in."

His office was nowhere as large or comfortable as Sam's, or as well-equipped seeing as he hardly spent time here. Its dark red walls always seemed to close in on him, especially since there was only a minor window tucked in a corner that hardly let in any large amount of sunlight. John preferred to do his meetings with subordinates in more relaxed and comfortable atmospheres like the mess hall. Seeing Xiaoyi and Coolidge look around the slightly dank, stale office with poorly concealed disdain, however, John felt slightly defensive about his space and was resolved not to make it any easier on them.

"So you wanna tell me what this is all about?" John asked as he settled down in his chair, putting his feet up on the desk.

Having only one hard uncomfortable chair available for any visitors, John noticed silently that Xiaoyi chose to sit down while Coolidge remained on his feet, hovering in the background.

Taking her time, Xiaoyi dug forth several folders from her briefcase and handed one over to John. He accepted it, leaving it on the desk as he flipped through it. His eyes narrowed as he read.

"What's this supposed to be?" John asked, his voice low and edged. He gave both IOA members a suspicious look.

Xiaoyi sat back in her chair, an icy expression upon her face. "It's come to our attention, Colonel, that many of the people on Atlantis are concerned about the obvious lack of resources being put into the operation of the city, considering what is available."

John paused from the reading to raise an eyebrow. He said obviously, "Oh really?"

Xiaoyi paid him no particular heed, continuing seamlessly. "Since Atlantis settled on this planet two months ago, every scientist and technician have been working practically non-stop on immediate repairs, so far without complaint. Now, however, many of them wish for a leave of absence unless you can allocate more resources to them."

"You've gotta be kidding me," John said in disbelief, closing the folder and staring at the two IOA members across the desk. "We've still got important repairs and upgrades going on. Just ask McKay." The Canadian hadn't missed a chance to remind John just  _how_  important each repair and upgrade was to the function of the city.

"On the contrary, Colonel, we're quite serious," said Coolidge uncharacteristically evenly, stepping forward with his arms crossed. John felt disgust churn in his stomach. "We've noticed for a long time that the command of this city clearly favours the military. You force the civilian technicians and scientists to work despite their wishes to take a leave of absence, and when your soldiers actively provoke the said hard-working civilians to petty fist fights, you don't punish them!"

" _What?_  That's ridiculous! I haven't heard a single thing about people being denied time off, and I sure as hell haven't been letting people off for fighting."

"And your notion of appropriate punishment for sending three civilians to the infirmary is  _training_?" Coolidge's eyes narrowed.

"They weren't serious injuries," said John, struggling to keep his anger in check. "And you don't know the heck of what  _training_  I've got in store for them…"

Coolidge leaned down, resting his knuckles on top of John's desk. His eyes were fiery but controlled. "And what do you define as 'serious' injuries, Colonel? A broken hand? A knife wound? Or does it need to be a gun shot wound before you react?"

In the blink of an eye, John had launched to his feet, fisting his hands above the desk. "You son of a—"

"Colonel Sheppard," said Xiaoyi sharply, shifting in her seat. Her eyes were like icy steel and she continued before John had a chance to object. "You cannot ignore the fact that your soldiers are freely roaming the city without any restrictions, while the civilians are often working overtime with limited resources for the benefit of everyone on Atlantis. There is an obvious case of unequal treatment here, not to mention a certain opposition to assigning some of your soldiers to help with repairs. Many of them  _are_  capable of such. Even Colonel Carter stated so herself."

"We're only asking for our people's right for equality," added Coolidge, his eyes glinting challengingly. He leaned back with what John could only perceive as a smug look upon his face. It disgusted him.

" _Your_  people?" John asked slowly, narrowing his eyes as he began to calm down. The implication wasn't lost on him. "All I see in this city is  _our_  people."

Neither of the IOA members blinked an eye and none of them said another word. John stared at them, his mind churning at high speed. As loath as he was to admit it, Xiaoyi was right about some of the soldiers being capable of handling at least basic repairs. Giving in to them, however, tasted too much of defeat and John was already in a bad mood.

He couldn't ignore them, however, or Sam would have his hide and right now John didn't need another headache. That presented him with a dilemma: he still didn't know the state of mind of all the soldiers, and there were more than 200 of them in the city. After today, he sure as hell didn't want another conflict between soldiers and civilians, and putting them together on repair assignments… John had no idea what that would lead to.

"You can't have 'em," John said finally. "At least not until the training's done and I've talked to Colonel Carter about it. She'll probably agree with me that until we have control over the situation, we can't risk putting the wrong kind of people together. We don't wanna have more… _incidents_  to happen, do we?" He raised an eyebrow challengingly. "That good enough for 'your' people?"

Coolidge and Xiaoyi looked at each other, sharing a brief look before Xiaoyi turned to John, her features uneasily indecipherable.

"We will communicate that to them, Colonel," she said, gathering her folders and putting them back in her suitcase. She stood, her polite smile tight and emotionless. "I'm sure they'll appreciate your _…_ consideration. Have a good day."

Nodding to Coolidge, who followed with a mixed glance in John's direction, she exited the office. Staring at the closing door, John was restless. He had a feeling this was going to come back into his face. Violently.

* * *

Leaving the circle of light coming off the large communal cooking fire, Daniel couldn't help thinking about what Asok had mentioned to him earlier. They'd been watching Jennifer and Sam being drawn into a children's game by Reika and her friends, in which the adults had quickly ended up as being sided against the children and losing horrendously. But the women had smiled and chuckled, enjoying themselves, and Asok had succinctly and correctly observed that Sam in particular looked much younger when she smiled.

"It is difficult to be a leader of a wilful people," Asok had said, to Daniel's surprise.

He wasn't sure what Sam had told the Kadarian leader, but she'd probably kept those particular issues to herself. Not about to break Sam's trust in him, Daniel had refrained from saying anything but Asok had seemingly understood.

"It takes strength and will to have control during the events you have been through. Sam is a strong woman. But…perhaps too strong."

"It's good to see her smile," Daniel had admitted in the end, not being able to keep it all in.

Asok had simply said, "The power of children, Dr Jackson," without any further explanation, but none was needed. Daniel knew first hand how children affected your mood. When he'd been on Abydos, the fullness of the society around him had kept him from falling into melancholy, especially the children. To Sam…he remembered her reaction to Cassie, who'd been about Reika's age when Nirrti destroyed her planet, and that should be enough.

Moving away from the centre of the settlement, Daniel paused momentarily to see if he could see his target. Although the night was upon them and the moon not too bright, he could see a shadow moving slightly near a large tree on a small bank. He pursued it, climbing the slowly steeping bank until he reached her.

Daniel heard her before he saw her. Sam was humming softly, something he certainly hadn't heard in quite a while. Of all things, she was humming 'Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star' while staring up the night sky with big round eyes, slumped slightly in a relaxed pose. Simply listening, Daniel waited for a few moments before making his presence known.

"Hi," he greeted plainly, groaning a little at the ache in his leg as he eased himself down next to her. "Hope I'm not interrupting."

"You're not," said Sam easily, pausing her humming. She continued to look upwards, smiling as if recalling something.

"Remembering good times?" Daniel asked quietly, personally referring to the Milky Way and the numerous times they'd been seated just like this: underneath a tree while staring at the stars.

He knew Sam would catch his drift. Jack and Teal'c had joined them occasionally, each contributing to the various constellations they thought they could see. Daniel had been amazed at how their perspectives of the constellations changed from planet to planet.

"Yes," said Sam gently, shifting so that their shoulders touched. Daniel smiled at the gesture, but didn't try to hug her. That wasn't what it was about. It was simply about presence. "You recall P3X-772?"

"The planet with the little people?" Daniel recalled something along those lines and Sam's chuckle confirmed it. "Yeah, what about it?"

"They were pretty carefree. They had no worries. At least not until we got there…" Sam's voice gradually took on a melancholic tone, which Daniel picked up immediately.

"You're worried about the Kadarians?" He shifted an inch closer. They didn't look at each other, simply staring at the stars. Sam's hands were beginning to flex upon her legs.

"Yeah," Sam said slowly, eyes blinking. Her voice was low now. "We've already lost so many people, Daniel… I don't want the Wraith to take more of them."

"Me neither," mumbled Daniel. He reached out and took one of Sam's hands in his. "But you shouldn't be worrying about the Kadarians. They're safe here. You made sure of that."

Sam only hummed in reply, but her hand gripped Daniel's hard, saying a lot about the unspoken sentiments in her head. After several moments, her hand began to loosen its tight grip and Sam let out a contemplative sigh.

"They're so different than Atlantis."

Daniel knew she was speaking of the Kadarians and smiled. "You seemed to be enjoying yourself earlier. Got yourself some new friends?"

Sam chuckled softly. "Reika's a great kid. She reminds me of…"

She didn't say it but Daniel had a hunch he knew who she talked about. The girl had touched Sam more than any other kids Daniel knew of, including her brother's kids, and not knowing what'd happened to her…

Daniel felt it as keenly as anyone else, he reckoned. Losing Earth had hit them all hard and they were still struggling. Most of them just refused to let it show. Daniel was a firm believer in 'Time's a healer', however, and knew they'd get past even that particular loss one day. It just seemed impossible right now. Like so many other things...

"I wonder how John's meeting with the IOA went," Sam said suddenly. "They're…" She paused, biting her lip. "Something's happening, Daniel. I don't like it."

Sam admitting to know the changes Daniel had noticed on Atlantis for the past month was unsurprising, but he still didn't know what to say that hadn't already been said. It was clear that Sam was worried enough that it was threatening her good mood, as well as Daniel's objective in luring Sam into this mission. She needed a break. As such, he said the most obvious thing he could.

"You'll have to ask him when you get back."

When Sam looked sceptical, Daniel raised his eyebrow in challenge, daring her to protest. Seeing that he wasn't about to give up, Sam eventually gave him a small smile and squeezed his hand.

Moments later, in the comfortable, drowsy silence of the warm night, she began to hum 'Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star' again. Daniel smiled.

* * *

  
**Next:** "Uno Ab Alto."

* * *


	11. Day 110

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is a time to say: Enough is enough.

 

 

****

* * *

**TEN | "Uno Ab Alto."**

_Prompt: a time to rend  
Music: Halo 3: ODST – all Mombasa street tunes_

* * *

**DAY 110**

John stepped off the raised stone steps the stargate was standing on, his weapon raised to eyelevel and trained on his surroundings. Thick undergrowth and tall, lush trees made a nearly impenetrable wall around the small clearing except where the overgrown path leading to the settlement broke the monotony. Hardly any light reached the ground through the thick branches at the top of the trees, covering the silent, forest floor with only scattered spots of afternoon light.

His hands tightened around his P90, knuckles whitening as his ears perked. The clearing was silent. Maybe too silent. Blinking once at a particular dark spot beneath the stone steps, John heard the rest of his team exit the wormhole with slow steps of cold-headed anticipation.

"Spread out," John ordered, his voice low, sparing the others soldiers a glance as he descended the last step. Their weapons rose as they watched their surroundings. They quickly made a perimeter around the stone steps and approached the undergrowth cautiously. Some glanced over their shoulders. Not even a bird made a sound. John didn't like it.

A battle-dressed Ronon jumped off the steps next to him - the ground reverberated with his weight. John turned back and approached the shadow he now saw on the forest floor – his neck tense and pulsating. It was the unmoving figure of something humanoid. Taking a quick look around and keeping his weapon trained on the forest, John hooked his foot cautiously underneath the figure and flipped it over into a ray of light.

"Ugh!"

The wide-eyed, frightened look upon a white-haired husk of a human stared up at him. John flinched and grimaced. He could never get used to the sight.

"Wraith." Ronon growled, snapping his chin up to sneer ferally at their surroundings beneath dark, low eyebrows. He kept his particle magnum close to his sides, looking like a wolf ready to pounce.

"There's three more by the DHD, and one of them was carrying the settlement's IDC." Major Lorne approached them. He held the said black remote in his hand; it had been broken and rendered useless, the internal wires barely holding the pieces together.

John eyed their dark surroundings - narrowing his eyes at the quiet shadows. He tried to determine whether he was looking at trees or something else. Blood was pounding through his veins. They already suspected the Wraith were somehow involved in the interrupted distress call from this planet, but this confirmed it. He looked back at the stargate, seeing the last of the groundpounders exit. The rest were approaching the border of the small clearing: spread out in a perimeter, eyes on the dark forest - weapons at the ready.

"We shouldn't stick around," said John deliberately, glancing at two lone soldiers peering into the forest above the dark, thick undergrowth to his left, their weapons held high. "Major, take your team—"

Blue shots suddenly blasted into the small clearing from the forest around them. One connected with the face of an inattentive marine, dropping him like a sack of potatoes. The man next to him was down before John's instinct kicked in.

"Take cover!" John yelled, spinning around and sliding into cover behind the stone steps with Lorne and Ronon. He watched as the rest of the soldiers dodged and weaved, using the trees as cover from the incoming attack. With blood pumping in his ears, John saw a straggler move towards the DHD, only to get hit in the back and crash into the ground five steps away.

Then the Wraith Drones charged from the shadows. They burrowed through the undergrowth unfazed, stun weapons blasting away, grotesque and mindless. John's mind shifted from the five visible bodies on the ground to the Drones already crossing the forest barrier.

"Weapons free!" John's command came just milliseconds before the sound of P90s and FN SCAR-Hs broke through the air.

Chaos reigned. Ronon double tapped the trigger of his particle magnum and nailed a Drone in the chest and gut. It stumbled before crashing into the ground two feet inside the clearing, smoke drifting from its quivering corpse.

The Drone behind him sidestepped the body and raised his spear gun to his sightless face, shooting wildly at the soldiers still scrambling for cover in the too small clearing. Another of them was hit by the blue energy blast, crumbling next to the DHD where one of his teammates pulled him behind cover and returned fire blindly. The blue bolts came from everywhere, trapping the team in a crossfire. Another Airman fell to the ground by the DHD, unconscious.

John flicked off the safety button and fired a burst at the Drone closest to him. The 5.7mm rounds tore through the flimsy organic armour, dropping the Drone like a rock. Lorne opened fire beside him, covering his flank as the entire team now fought back.

No one needed John's shouted orders to do whatever they could to hold the line. All around them, rapid fire erupted, mingling with the soft blasts of the Wraith stunners and the alien roars of the unrelenting chargers.

With a slow, writhing fall, the Drone John had killed collapsed next to his fallen comrades-in-arms. John swung around to the next Drone charging into the small clearing from his left, tracing a diagonal line across its chest with his fire. But where one of them fell, another two stepped into place, slowly gaining a foothold inside the small circle surrounding the stargate.

Lorne called out a warning as he flung a grenade out towards the incoming Drones. Its loud and rumbling bang satisfied John's ears. Five Drones fell into shredded heaps, shrapnel buried deep within them.

The soldiers by the DHD had formed a small phalanx, and with their automatic weapons kept the Wraith from taking the console. Another two had fallen to stunner fire but the three remaining ones kept firing and reloading. John saw them grimace in the muzzle flashes of their P90s, flinching away from incoming energy bolts sizzling above their heads.

John found himself trapped between incoming energy blasts and the cold slab of stone behind him. He flinched away and grit his teeth in shock as a bolt landed a little too close to his head for comfort.

Ronon leapt to his feet, roaring as he counter-charged at the closest Drones. In one hand he kept his particle magnum, in the other his sword. He ducked under a stun rifle aimed for his head, swinging around and kicking the Wraith Drone squarely in the chest. He fired two blasts into it before spinning around again and cleaving another Drone's gut wide open. A spray of bluish fluids burst across the mossy forest floor.

John cursed and almost took off after the Satedan, but in the second his attention was directed elsewhere, a faceless Wraith Drone had managed to get close and was waving his spear gun at Lorne's unprotected back. The Major was firing across the clearing at a Wraith Commander intent on attacking two retreating Airmen. John jumped up and fired straight into the torso of the oncoming Drone - adrenaline pumping through his veins. Bluish blood and bits of organic armour flew into Lorne's back as the Drone was torn apart.

He heard the unmistakable sound of grenades detonating. But the second of inattention let a new Drone charge up behind John. Lorne dove to the side and fired at his attacker. The Drone howled in agony as his chest ripped open, and fell to his knees just as John turned. He kicked the falling Wraith away from him with a disgusted sound.

With the Drone's charge blunted, the momentary pause gave John the chance to quickly look around. Ronon moved like water as he parried and eviscerated two Drones that had tried to crush him with their hands. His face was dripping with sweat and Wraith blood, teeth barred as he looked around for his next target.

The soldiers who hadn't been stunned had regrouped into a phalanx to cover each other with their P90s and FN SCAR-Hs. Half of the entire team had been stunned and were lying like corpses on the battlefield. The Wraith were attacking either side of the path leading to the settlement where the undergrowth wasn't as thick. The Atlantis team spread their return fire as a result. Already the border of the clearing was shadowed with bodies, both Wraith and Earthborn.

A Wraith Commander darted out smoothly at John from the shadows. He didn't have time to figure things out: a twisted grimace was on the Wraith's face. John instinctively pushed off the ball of his left foot and shoved Lorne down with him, narrowly avoiding the first shot. Both men hit the floor and rolled, John blindly firing at the Commander.

"Reload!" shouted John above the weapons fire, using Lorne's suppressive fire as cover. Lorne shouted as he dropped the Commander with an accurate burst, the dirt on his face slipping off as he pushed to his feet. John finished reloading his P90 before the Wraith sank to the ground with open, glaring eyes that shone white in the darkness. John moved forward and kicked the Wraith's face, sending it back to the ground before turning back to Lorne who'd already switched targets. John followed Lorne's ironsights to a Drone popping out from behind a heavy tree trunk.

John had no clue how long it'd been. Only when the weapons fire died down a little did he realise that Sam's voice was shouting in his ear,  _"—ome in, Colonel! John, talk to me! What's going—"_ Her voice was drowned in the bang of another grenade somewhere on the other side of the clearing, then it was quiet.

For now, it seemed as if the Wraith had pulled back.

Crouching behind the stone steps once more, John touched the reply button and shielded his ringing ear while Lorne covered him against the looming forest. "Sam? You there?"

" _I read you, John. What the hell's happening?"_

"It's the Wraith. We've taken fire and casualties." John did a quick head count, forcing his breath and racing heart back under control. "We're down at least half our strength. Gonna need some back-up."

" _Copy. Daedalus is on its way and I'm sending the rest through ASAP. Just…hang in there, John."_

John blew a breath, his mind flashing to all those times she'd spoken those words to him. Despite the situation and everything that had happened, his tone of voice changed to match hers: softer and almost hesitant. "Copy that."

* * *

Reese fastened the buttons on her shirt as she hurried through the corridors to the infirmary. The message she'd received was bad and caught her off guard. No one had said anything about upcoming missions, but Major Teldy had been dangerously serious when ordering her to assemble her team as quickly as possible for a hostile situation off-world.

"Make a hole!"

Reese looked over her shoulder, eyes widening as she instinctively jumped back to the wall. Dr Keller rushed past her between two gurneys and the rest of her medical team, wedging Reese against the wall. Frowning, Reese caught a glimpse of the BDU-clad men on the gurneys, but not enough to see what was wrong with them. Judging by the battle gear they still wore, however, it had something to do with Teldy's order.

Reese followed the group into the infirmary where the gurneys were immediately pushed towards the innermost section to the emergency ward. Nurses and doctors from the former SGC infirmary hurried after them as Keller called for help, gesturing Reese to stay behind in the unofficial ICU ward.

"What's going on?" Ramirez looked up from where he sat on the edge of a nearby examination bed, flexing his left hand testingly. Reese reluctantly withdrew her gaze from the emergency room, her annoyance flaring up at the sight of the Sergeant.

"I don't know, but we're going to be part of it. That is if you've stopped being  _an idiot_." Reese pointed at the bruised left hand, her voice terse. "Otherwise, I don't mind leaving you behind in the brig,  _Sergeant_."

"I was never an idiot to start with," said Ramirez, his eyes narrowed. Then he shrugged. "Besides, Nelson started it."

"That's  _real_  mature," growled Reese with a tensing of her cheek. Her hands clenched and she forced them to hang loose at her sides, taking a deep breath as she raised one to pinch her nose. "Just… get your shirt on, Ramirez. We haven't got time for this."

Ramirez looked as if he wanted to say something, but the medical team rushing back out of the emergency room interrupted them. Keller followed with a grim look as they disappeared through the open infirmary door.

"What's happening?" asked Ramirez, his eyes sombre now as he jumped off the bed and put on his uniform shirt.

Reese frowned as she led the way out. "I dunno, but I've got a feeling it ain't nothing good."

* * *

"Your objective is to reinforce and secure the stargate while Colonel Sheppard's team continues towards the settlement." Sam's steely voice was the only sound in the gateroom. She eyed the combat-ready teams of Marines and Air Force engineer with a hard face, her body tense. "Engineers, your job is to cut down as much of the trees around the stargate as possible. I don't need it clean I just need it  _fast._ I want Jumpers to be able to get through within the hour."

"What about  _Daedalus,_ ma'am?" asked Major Teldy from her spot at the front of the group. "When can we expect them to be there?"

"They're still fifty minutes away." No one needed to remark that it might as well be an eternity. The importance of the engineers became crystal clear; she could see they'd realised it. Sam pushed on. "Any further questions?" She looked at each of them, some nervous and others ready. None of them said anything. "Okay, then move out. Major Lorne's expecting you on the other side."

Sam didn't wait to see them leave, quickly turning and moving up the grand staircase to the operations centre. The stargate wooshed behind her as the first one went through.

She'd just sat down behind the long-range sensor console and was leaning towards Chuck when Xiaoyi strode into the room. She was dressed impeccably in her finest surviving suit, her hair swept conservatively out of her face.

"Colonel Carter, would you mind telling me what's going on?" Xiaoyi halted in front of her, hands on her hips, a displeased look upon her face. "I just came from the Tikwee delegation. They said you just shunted them out of here nearly two hours ago!  _Why_  wasn't I informed?"

Locking her jaw, Sam ignored the woman's icy interruption. "We're answering a distress call, Ms Xiaoyi. I'm afraid the trade delegation will have to  _wait_ for a moment." Xiaoyi crossed her arms with pursed lips, but Sam was already paying attention to the data being input into her laptop from Chuck's console.

"Even so," said Xiaoyi in a terse tone, "that is  _not_ the way to treat a future business partner, Colonel. It's common courtesy—"

"—I don't have time for _courtesy!_ " interjected Sam. Xiaoyi's lips snapped shut. "This is a military matter, and as the commander of this base I'm needed here. I'll see to the delegation when this is over."

As if suddenly aware of the activity in the gateroom, Xiaoyi looked over her shoulder at the last team moving through the stargate. Her expression was indiscernible as she remained silent for several moments. Sam turned back to her laptop, gritting her teeth and half-wishing someone else were in charge, or that she could shove Xiaoyi out an airlock.

The stargate connection closed, inciting Xiaoyi into action. "Colonel," she said in an amiable tone, turning back towards Sam with open hands. "I'd hate for the Tikwee to feel… _overlooked_  at this time in our negotiations." She paused, continuing hesitantly. "If you cannot deal with them right now, I'd be happy to take care of them until you can."

Sam halted, lifting her eyes up.

Nothing about Xiaoyi's expression or posture eased her doubts. There was, however, something that kept her from blowing off the offer. As loathe as she was to admit it, Sam couldn't be in two places at once. Her priorities grounded her here, and Xiaoyi was right in that they  _were_  at a crucial stage in the negotiations. If they secured the deal, it would change a lot of things for Atlantis's resource pool. Sam and Rodney had both wanted an off-world mining operation for months.

She would have preferred Daniel or Teyla looking after the delegation as "official" negotiators, but both of them had gone to visit the Athosians for a few days. With John off-world as well, she was on her own.

Well, not entirely.

"Alright," Sam said finally, her voice calculated. " _But_ …" she added as Xiaoyi's face briefly wavered in pleasure, "I want Woolsey in on it too." Technically, Woolsey wasn't part of the senior council any longer, nor an official representative for Atlantis, but Sam didn't care about the rude implication. She needed someone she could trust.

As ever, Xiaoyi politely nodded in response without any indication she was offended. She even smiled at Sam. "Very well. I will call for him immediately. We'll be in the smaller mess hall." She turned and strode towards the back staircase before Sam could say another word.

* * *

" _Back-up's through. What's your status, John?"_

Sam's disconnected voice crackled through the radio as John moved quickly down the overgrown forest path. Ronon was on point; his leather-clad back barely visible in the shadows up ahead, even though John's eyes had accustomed themselves to the darkness. The rest of the original twenty-strong team - except Major Lorne and two other engineers - followed in a double-file tactical column, eyes peeled towards the trees around them. John's hands were sweating around the P90, his face itching where Wraith blood and dirt had stuck onto it. Small flies flitted around his hot scalp. He swatted them away with a jittery shake of his head.

"We're about forty minutes out," whispered John, turning sharply at an odd noise somewhere behind him. Only a bird trapped beneath the branches, speeding across the path above him. John reminded himself to breathe deeply, exhaling through his nose as he moved on. "Almost at the end of the forest. Haven't encountered any Wraith so far. Wouldn't mind some eyes in the air, though. I don't like going in blind."

" _Copy that. Daedalus ETA should now be half an hour. The Jumpers are on stand-by until the engineers give the clear."_

Up ahead, Ronon stilled, halting the column. The soldiers quickly assumed crouched positions along each side of the path, taking cover behind the trees. A cold dread ran down John's back. He suppressed it quickly, keeping his voice cool. "Copy. Sheppard out."

He cut the connection, briskly moving in-between the soldiers ahead and coming up behind Ronon. "What'd you see, Chewie?"

The Satedan held his palm up, silencing him. "Listen."

Ronon peered out into the forest, slowly moving his head left and right. John followed suit, clutching his P90 closer to his chest. At first there was nothing except the heavy breathing of Airman Donovan behind him. Then he heard it. Faint sounds up ahead on their left, gradually coming closer. Someone else was on the forest path and they were in a hurry.

John pivoted on his heel, quickly signalling the situation with his hands to the rest of the team. Silently, they all got off the path and took up positions on one side, covered by the trees and thick undergrowth. John wound up next to Ronon, crouching by a large rock close to the path as they waited. Ronon's hand fisted around his particle magnum. It rested against his temple, ready. John saw the veins elevated underneath the cold metal. His own grip tightened.

The approaching sounds grew louder. The Airman on John's right, Donovan, held up his Lantean life signs detector, signalling fifteen targets. Ronon's narrow eyes were trained on the path. The flies around John's head continued to swarm, but he hugged the P90 closer to his chest and ignored them. He breathed deeply, silently, his muscles tense. Anticipation coiled his stomach.

Ronon's dark scowl alerted John immediately. He dared a quick look at the path, seeing the unmistakable white hair of a Wraith party turn greyish in the darkness some sixty feet away. They were half-running. John didn't like it. It looked like they had a purpose and this path only led one place.

Grim-faced, John shifted back to the rest of the team. His hand and fingers moved rapidly with his orders. The soldiers nodded and readied their weapons. Ronon almost scoffed as John and Donovan pulled one M84 stun grenade each out of their vest pockets. Ignoring him, John pulled the safety pin out and kept his hand tight on the lever. He met Donovan's eyes and counted down with his spare hand.

Five…four…three…two…one—

They launched the grenades into the midst of the passing Wraith party. Seconds later, multiple high-pitched bangs and flashes of light erupted into the darkness. John shied away from the sharp light just as Ronon jumped to his feet, teeth barred. He roared ferally as he fired off red-hot bolts into the group of floundering Wraith.

Seven Wraith Drones dropped like flies as 5.7mm and 7.62mm rounds joined in and tore through their organic armour.

* * *

Reese's head jerked up when she heard the muffled gunfire erupting from the forest. She jumped to her feet, weapon trained in the direction of the unmistakable sounds of P90s and FN-SCARs. The MG teams covering the forest path scrambled for their weapons, but they soon realised it wasn't anywhere nearby.

Major Lorne quickly dropped the C4 satchel in his hand and turned on his radio. "Colonel Sheppard. Sir, is everything alright? Colonel?"

Reese couldn't hear the response and the expression of Lorne's face didn't reveal anything. Her fingers clenched around her P90, her eyes shifting unevenly between the Major and the looming forest up ahead. Next to her, Ramirez stepped forward, looking as calm as ever. Reese didn't share his confidence. She hadn't been in a firefight since…the Bhaati. That one hadn't exactly gone very well.

"Copy that, sir," Lorne said finally, his brow revealing only the slightest hesitation. He shut off his radio, looking up at the frozen people in the clearing. "Let's pick up the pace, people! Get those charges ready!" He hurried back to the engineers he'd been helping out. Something in his voice seemed edgy. It kicked everyone into action.

Reese shared a look with Ramirez, who shrugged and eased back to his previous guard position by the active stargate. She then followed Major Teldy with her eyes as she approached Lorne. The two majors shared a quick, muffled conversation before Teldy nodded and moved away, one hand on her radio. Reese saw her mouth 'Atlantis' before Teldy spotted her and sent her a hard look.

Reese relaxed her stance mechanically, quickly turning back to her previous position. She couldn't help glancing at the dark forest again. The gunfire continued, but it seemed to grow fainter. Her neck was tense.

What the hell was going on out there?

* * *

"Don't let him get away!" John screamed, charging through the undergrowth. He fired off a spread of 5.7mm bursts, sending wooden splinters flying into the air in the Wraith Commander's wake.

Ronon's red bolts soared over his head from behind - hitting nothing but trees as the Wraith twisted to the side. John recoiled from the searing bolts, which caused him to stumble into a low branch. He groaned, cursing at the nerve jab that shot down his shoulder. Ronon passed him, weaving in-between the trees like water, running at the Devil's pace.

Adrenaline pumped in his ears. John launched himself off the tree trunk, stumbling for a few feet until he regained his footing. The trees were starting to thin and John saw the Commander's white hair lighten amidst Ronon's magnum shots. The forest was coming to an abrupt end. The Wraith picked up speed as he crossed the tree line, holding something to his lips.

"Take him down!" John yelled, but Ronon was one step ahead of him. A red bolt hit the Wraith in his arm. He howled in agony, twisting forward, and lost the item in his hand. Still, he ran. At one point, the Commander glanced back and quickly ducked again - narrowly avoiding Ronon's aimed headshot. He met John's eyes and sneered.

Gritting his teeth, John roared and pushed his leg muscles to the limit, sending off another P90 burst. The shots were way off course, but it caused the Wraith to switch right and head straight back into Ronon's sights. The Wraith took a hit to the other arm and crashed into the ground; his hoarse cry pierced the air.

John's blood soared as he crossed the tree line. Ronon pulled out his sword and was moving in quickly for the kill. The blade glinted silvery in the late evening light as he raised it over his head. The Wraith Commander stumbled to his feet, but it was too late. Ronon's sword swung down with a drawn-out yell, slashing across the Wraith's back. Howling, the Commander fell down on his knees. Ronon didn't waste time. In two slashes, dark blood sprayed all over the Satedan's demonic face.

Halting two steps away, John's breath was heavy. Ronon's chest heaved with exertion, but his gaze was fixed upon the unmoving body lying at his feet. The blade in his hand dripped with blood. Slowly, he moved his head to the side and paused. Following his gaze, John spotted three white-haired husks sprawled in a cluster to his right, another two some metres up the hillside ahead.

John met Ronon's narrowed eyes. No words were necessary. They got their targets. They couldn't change the past. They just had to move on.

John took a deep breath and tried to ease the blood pounding in his head. The flies returned, buzzing around his head. He turned back to the forest and saw the rest of the team running towards them across the grassy field. Fortunately, he hadn't lost anyone in the ambush. He held his arm up to give them the clear—

—and heard the tell-tale whine of incoming Wraith darts.

"Get down!" John yelled immediately, waving his palm down for emphasis as he saw two darts appear like shimmering dots above the forest. The early starlight glinted off organic, purplish armour.

Almost all of them hit the deck. John watched in horror as two stragglers disappeared in the transparent beam swooping across the field.

The P90 was in his hands and running hot before he knew it. It wouldn't take down the dart but  _dammit_  he had to try. The darts turned towards him, the shrill whine increasing in strength. Roaring, John instinctually flung himself to one side, narrowly avoiding the bluish beam three feet away from him. He rolled and got to his feet as the darts disappeared beyond the hill ahead of them, then turned and came back.

"Take cover!" John raised his weapon again and fired a continuous burst at the closest Wraith dart, drawing its attention. He ran as he fired, joined by a FN-SCAR somewhere behind and to his left. The second dart sparked with a direct hit, spewing smoke.

" _Take cover_!" he screamed again as the second dart broke off and went in the opposite direction, towards the wielder of the FN-SCAR. The soldier was swept up by its beam just as he reached the bottom of the rocky hill. John's anger flared up and he halted, emptying the rest of his clip at the incoming dart. No hits.

It drove on mercilessly, engaging its beam amidst the flashes of Ronon's magnum bolts and 5.7mm rounds. John's P90 clicked and he cursed, launching himself into a sprint away from the rest of the team. The beam was ten feet behind and closing in. John saw an outcropping to his right and broke off, heart racing. The dart was almost on top of him. He wouldn't make it.

John looked back, the bluish beam filling his vision, and then…his sight exploded in reds and yellows, sending him crashing into the ground. Bits of shrapnel and something sticky rained all over his back, weighing him down.

Another explosion rocked the atmosphere and John flinched, his ears ringing. Then it all went quiet.

In John's ear, his radio crackled and slowly came to life.  _"Someone ordered a pick-up?"_

Teldy's scrambled voice was a godsend.

* * *

" _We lost Richardson, Martin and Donovan. … No bodies."_ John's voice in her ear was solid but detached. Sam recognised it only too well. They'd known it was a risk to move into a situation blind, but they'd had no choice. The settlers needed their help.

Sam reined in a sigh. "What's your ETA to the settlement?"

" _Ten minutes, give or take."_

Looking down from the catwalk, Sam gave the green light to an awaiting puddle jumper. "Alright. I'm sending the last Jumper through now.  _Daedalus_  should be there any minute."

" _Copy. Sheppard out."_

Sam gripped the railing. Her fingers clenched around the cold steel as she followed the disappearing Jumper with her eyes. In the operations centre, Chuck nodded to confirm a successful transport. She sighed, closing her eyes.

Ten minutes. That's all there was. Now she just had to wait.

"Colonel?" Opening her eyes, Sam found Woolsey striding uncertainly into the operations centre, looking around for her.

"Richard," she greeted him warily, gaining his attention. She stood up straight; her limbs felt sluggish. "Shouldn't you be down in the smaller mess hall?"

The balding, bespectacled man approached her hesitantly, hands jittery at his sides. He, like Xiaoyi, was dressed in a business suit. "I should, except there was no one there."

" _What?_ " Sam blurted out.

Woolsey grimaced, shifting on his feet. "It would  _seem_  my colleagues have left without me." His voice was half-resigned.

Blood suddenly pounded in Sam's ears. She established a radio connection without another look at Woolsey. "Xiaoyi, this is Colonel Carter. Please respond."

Woolsey remained silent as Sam began to pace on the catwalk. Her hands balled into fists, making her knuckles whiten. On the third attempt, Xiaoyi finally responded.

" _Yes, Colonel?"_

"You mind telling me where you are?" Sam strained to keep her voice civil and calm. She focused her eyes on a point on the wall, channelling her anger into that single point.

Xiaoyi's voice was unassuming.  _"We have moved to more comfortable quarters. I realised the mess hall was not a suitable location for such important discussions as ours."_

Sam's jaw tightened. " _Your_  quarters?" she asked tersely, already knowing the answer.

" _Indeed, Colonel. I left a message for Mr Woolsey with the mess hall staff, but he must not have gotten it. Could you please inform him of the change in location if you see him?"_

"... _Sure_ ," Sam responded through gritted teeth, cutting the connection. She turned towards Woolsey in icy anger, barely keeping her voice in check. "They're in  _Shen's_  quarters." The enunciation didn't leave room for misinterpretation.

Woolsey caught up immediately; his eyes narrowed in understanding even as he assumed his political mask. "I see. I'll get down there straight away."

Chuck interrupted Sam's initial reply from the operations centre, "Colonel, we've got a subspace transmission from the  _Daedalus_. They've picked up some unusual readings."

Nodding her acknowledgment to the technician, Sam turned to Woolsey. "I trust your abilities, Richard. Get it done." She didn't need to clarify. Woolsey nodded, paused to wish her good luck, and left quickly.

Not wasting any time, Sam turned and crossed the catwalk to the operations centre. She went straight to Chuck's console and leaned over his shoulder. "Alright, show me wh—"

Her voice halted as Chuck immediately pointed to the screen, his expression grim. The sensor readings from the  _Daedalus_ were unmistakable.

Her stomach dropped.

* * *

"I'm picking up a lot of Wraith darts in the area… thirty of them." Major Teldy's voice broke through the quiet hum of the Jumper's engines. "They're swarming the settlement." John turned from the crowded aft compartment and came up behind Teldy in the front passenger chair. Captain Alicia Vega was flying, taking the cloaked Jumper in a straight line across steep mountains and low valleys.

Peering at the holographic screen above the dashboard, John narrowed his eyes. "Any life signs on the ground?"

"Some…" Teldy hesitated, touching a few buttons and bringing up a more detailed elevation scan. "I've got a bunch of Wraith packs in scattered locations along the path. Looks like they're moving towards the settlement."

John's neck tensed. In the compartment behind him, everyone had gone eerily silent. He clenched his fingers on the back of Teldy's chair. "What about humans?"

"There's not a lot of them, but I've got multiple life signs near the settlement." Teldy's voice rose hopefully at the end. John, however, didn't take his eyes off the holographic screen. The blue dots were by far not the total amount of the settlers.

"Major?" asked Vega, breaking the tense silence. She pointed briefly to something on the edge of the holographic screen. "What's that flashing?"

Teldy frowned and pushed more buttons, zeroing in on the flashing strobe. John leaned closer. "An energy signature," she said finally. "It's outside the atmosphere, but… the energy output resembles what I've seen on Atlantis."

She halted, turning with wide eyes to meet John's. " _It's_   _a ZPM_."

" _Daedalus?_ " asked John immediately. His insides grew cold. There weren't that many ships carrying ZPMs in the Pegasus galaxy. Not since they'd got rid of the Asurans.

"I'm not s— _Wait_! Now there's two!"

" _Colonel Sheppard, come in."_  Caldwell's calm, detached voice was on his radio.

"This is Sheppard," John replied quickly, holding one hand over his ear. He peered at the screen, where a large blue dot appeared. The  _Daedalus_  IFF tag popped up next to it. "You see what we see up there?"

Caldwell's reply was almost sardonic.  _"If you're talking about a massive Wraith superhive, then yes."_ He paused, his voice low.  _"You better hurry up, Sheppard. I don't know how long we can hold them off."_

* * *

"They've launched darts," reported Major Kevin Marks succinctly, his eyes flitting across the screen on his console. Multiple red rectangles identified the hostile targets heading their way.

Next to him, Caldwell looked as frosty as ever. He pushed a button on his armrest. "Titan wing, you're cleared to engage. Keep those darts off our tail, any means necessary."

The Titan wing leader signed in his affirmative, and Marks watched the blue rectangles show up on his screen. Outnumbered, the blue dots sped straight into the middle of the fray. Three red dots disappeared in short sequence. A short relief ran through Marks before Caldwell gained his attention.

"Weapons status?"

Marks quickly pulled up a new window on his screen, reporting as he read. "Asgard plasma cannons are online. Aft and dorsal railguns are auto-targeting enemy fighters."

"Asgard beams?"

"Standing by. They're trying to lock onto human signatures, but…"

Caldwell met his gaze. He understood. It could be interference or it could be time.

"Take us in, Major. Full speed," ordered Caldwell, turning back to gaze through the windows. "Let us show these bastards we're not about to back down."

"Yes, sir!" Marks complied with the order immediately. He ran his fingers over the keyboard in familiar, speedy motions. Multi-tasking was his prerogative. Balancing incoming sensor data with navigational data, and inputting flight paths had become second nature.

In the corner of his eye, he saw the reddish swarm of rectangles still surrounding the fifteen blue dots. It was hard to see how many Wraith darts had been taken down. Marks quickly pushed the unpleasant thoughts out of his head and steeled himself. They'd trained for this. The plan was simple. Get in, evasive manoeuvres, then pound the Wraith with everything they had, and get out of the way immediately. Repeat until desired goal or a change of plan was needed.

He dared a glance up at the screen. Growing bigger as they came closer, the superhive hovered above the dark atmosphere of the planet. Marks never got used to the sight. It was easily fifteen times the  _Daedalus_ ' size. Like David versus Goliath. He could only hope their stone would drop the Wraith as well.

When it began to spit blue plasma bolts, Marks wasn't quite so sure.

"Incoming fire!" Marks called, quickly adjusting the flight plan according to the new sensor data, even before Caldwell shouted, "Evasive manoeuvres!"

The ship took a sharp turn, swerving out of the way of the blue plasma bolts launched from the superhive's starboard side. Marks watched on the screen as all enemy batteries opened fire, spraying the space between them with plasma bolts. A blue dot suddenly disappeared, trapped between the two ships. He looked up just as it exploded into fireworks of reddish smoke and debris. Two red rectangles went with it.

Fisting his hands around the armrests, Caldwell barked, "Return fire!"

The crew didn't hesitate. Railguns and missiles opened fire as Marks turned the ship about, doing his best to avoid the relentless fire from the superhive. Up, to the left, down, sharp turn, right, then left… He grabbed his few seconds of open space and fired off two shots from their own ZPM-enhanced Asgard plasma weapons. The beams soared across space, taking down four darts before crashing into the purplish organic armour of the Wraith superhive.

"Direct hit!" Marks reported, already adjusting the  _Daedalus_  away from incoming fire, barely avoiding the blue bolts. "Enemy armour down 5 %! Regenerating!"

It wasn't much, but it was a start. They all knew that.

"Regroup and prepare for the second run." Caldwell's eyes didn't leave the windows.

* * *

"Daedalus _has engaged the superhive,"_  Lorne reported over the radio, serving as the relay between the planet and Atlantis.  _"Jumpers One through Four are approaching the settlement."_

Sam stood silently behind Chuck's shoulder, her hands fisted. She could feel her pulse begin to race slightly as her neck tensed. Her eyes were trained on the shimmering stargate.

"Have they detected any of the settlers?" She needed to ask. She didn't really want the answer. Her gut was already telling her what to expect.

"… _Yes, ma'am. They've detected several human life signs."_

Closing her eyes, Sam bit her lip. Several, not all. "I understand, Evan. Keep us appraised."

* * *

"You got a stick up your ass you're trying to get out, Captain?"

Reese resisted the urge to slap Ramirez across the head with her P90, but couldn't help her snarky, "Fuck you," as she continued to pace back and forth in the blue-lit clearing.

Ramirez only grinned, shrugging off her attitude. Across the clearing, Major Lorne looked up at her. His silence said more than words. Reese clenched her fists and forced herself to stop.

"Relieve Fowler on the OP,  _Sergeant_. I'm sure he could use a break." She straightened her back and sent him a hard look.

"Yes,  _ma'am_ ," responded Ramirez with only a hint of respect. He got to his feet and went off unhurriedly, leaving Reese frustrated and restless behind.

The man was getting on her nerves. Not only did he continually get into fights with Nelson, but he was more often than not disrespectful. Sure, he'd been frustrated after Sanders died – they all had – but this was getting out of hand. Reese felt like she was losing control. Right now, however, there was nothing she could do. Nothing at all.

She looked at the rest of her team, all seated on the stone steps leading to the still-active stargate. Kerrick and Stevenson were silent. Waiting, like the rest of them.

Reese glanced up at the sky. She hated waiting. Technically, they were keeping the stargate secure, but all they did was ache for action. Up in the sky, they saw the occasional explosions from  _Daedalus_ ' space battle with the superhive. On the radio, they could sometimes listen to the reports from the Jumpers.

It made her restless. She started pacing again.

* * *

Marks had known they wouldn't be able to dodge the superhive's fire for much longer. The ship rocked from the first hit, almost throwing those standing off their feet.

"Shields down 10 %!" he called out quickly, pulling the ship into sharp drop and taking it away from the superhive's concentrated fire.

Another hit impacted on the shields, its energy sending an overload through the ship's electrical systems. A fuse blew up by the communications console. The officer standing there jumped out of the way with a loud cry, clutching her face. Marks saw blood and smoke before turning back to his screen again.

" _Bridge, this is Novak. We've located a few human bio signatures in the hills above the settlement. We're trying to beam them up."_

"Roger, Doctor, " Caldwell acknowledged, "We'll try to get closer on our next pass."

Marks was already on it. Emma sent him new navigational data, and he was plotting in their next course with a guarded eye on the sensor screen. Titan wing was still in the game, blasting away red rectangles, but the number of enemy aircrafts didn't seem to decrease. They were swarming the superhive, and Marks couldn't help worry about crossfire.

"Sitrep?" asked Caldwell.

Marks pulled up the necessary data, reporting as he read. "Asgard weapons are still online. We've got eight direct hits so far. The Hive ship's armour is down 15 % on the aft port side, but they're regenerating rapidly. Railguns and missiles are down to 60 % capacity."

"Sir, I'm detecting a massive energy surge inside the Hive ship!"

"Source?" Caldwell turned to look at the jumpsuit-clad officer standing by the Sensors console.

"Subspace sensors show it's their ZPMs, sir," Emma cut in, just as Marks noticed something on his console.

"The Hive ship's turning about," he called out, looking briefly up to gain Caldwell's attention. "They're positioning themselves above the settlement."

"Multiple energy spikes along their port side!" the Sensor officer reported immediately, her voice taking on a frantic note. "Thirty and counting."

"What the—"

"They're opening fire!"

Suddenly, Marks could see what had happened to the Avrosians with his own eyes. From the left side of the superhive, thirty-six batteries of ZPM-enhanced plasma weapons engaged a spot on the dark planet below. The energy signatures of each shot were much higher than the average Wraith energy plasma bolt. Almost thrice the power of the Asgard plasma cannons.

And some of those shots were suddenly aiming for  _Daedalus_.

* * *

" _Shit!_ " Vega's shout was appropriate. The hailstorm of bluish plasma bolts soared down from the dark sky. The mountains flared up with light. Its jagged and barren rocks flashed yellow as the bolts crashed into the mountainsides. Bits of molten red rocks flew everywhere, the vegetation below the tree line set on fire.

"Watch out!" Teldy cried out, pointing to Vega's left where a stream of bolts rained down thirty feet away. The captain reacted immediately, flinging the Jumper to the right, barely avoiding one of the plasma bolts. John could almost feel the heat of it as it rushed down a thousand feet below them, exploding into the hills.

"They're aiming for the settlement!" Vega called out as she adjusted course, narrowly dodging another bolt. The electrical systems fizzled with the sudden spike of plasma activity in the atmosphere.

John's hands clenched around Teldy's chair, just as the Jumper's radio scrambled online.

" _This is Thompson on Jumper Three! We've taken fire! We're losing the cloak!"_  The frantic cry of Captain Thompson sprung John into action.

"Back off!" he called back on the radio, immediately moving to the window. He could see the Jumper shimmering in and out of sight on their left, careening between the bluish bolts. It was heading straight for the valley where the settlement was. The darts seemed to have spotted it and six of them were breaking off from the main group. "Get out of here!"

" _Copy, sir, we're—"_ The connection suddenly failed. Above the rolling hills, the Jumper tried to turn and instead began to spiral, one of its engines on fire. The darts on approach opened fire, spewing blue bolts amidst the heavier blue rain. The Jumper didn't stand a chance.

"Thompson!" John cried on the radio, watching as the Jumper, in full sight now, was hit by multiple shots from the Wraith darts. Sparks ignited from its engines, sending the Jumper careening out of control straight into another blue plasma bolt.

It exploded into a million pieces of molten shrapnel and debris, scattered across the forested ground below. John even heard some of it impact on their Jumper's hull.

* * *

"Titan Six and Eleven are down!" Marks reported, just as another blue dot disappeared on his screen. "That's Thirteen too, sir!"

"How're the transports going?" Caldwell barked just as an overhead relay sparked and smoked across the captain's chair. He flinched, holding on to the armrests.

"We were able to pick up twelve, sir!" The bridge engineer shouted above the noise. "The superhive's generating too much interference with their bombardment; we can't lock on!"

"Shields are down to 20 %!" Marks interjected, running his fingers quickly over the controls.

"Recall all fighters," ordered Caldwell, his eyes fixed on the windows. The superhive filled the frames, taunting and gloating. They hadn't even managed to take down their armour by 20 %, even with one of Atlantis's ZPMs to back them up. "Then target their port batteries with everything we've got. We gotta give Sheppard more time!"

* * *

"Sir, I can't get through this clusterfuck!" Vega called out, her voice an edge between frustration and despair. John was feeling it too. The blood was pounding in his head. He was itching for his P90, for the controls of the Jumper, for anything worthwhile to do besides staring at the Wraith's destruction.

"Try to outflank it.  _Daedalus_  said they'd spotted human signatures on the hillside opposite of the settlement. There's gotta be someone left," he mumbled angrily, fisting his hands. Teldy glanced at him but didn't say anything.

Vega gritted her teeth, pulling at the controls and taking the Jumper to the left, away from the plasma rain. They rose above a steep mountainside, circling the valley and aiming for the spot  _Daedalus_  had marked on their sensors. Jumpers Two and Four had pulled back to the stargate on John's orders, fearing that the darts would try to destroy their exit point now that their presence was known.

Speeding around the tall flames covering the valley, the Jumper was suddenly rocked by weapons impact.

"They've spotted us!" Teldy reported.

"How the hell did they do that?" John gritted out, bending over and looking out the windows at the darts swarming up ahead. Two of them were turning towards them.

"I dunno! Only the superhive's been able to detect a cloaked Jumper so far."

"Evasive manoeuvres," ordered John, even as the Jumper rocked and almost threw him off his feet.

Vega cursed, steering the Jumper sharply off course and trying to outmanoeuvre the Wraith darts. "We're losing the cloak!"

"Without that cloak, there's no way we're gonna reach the settlers!" Teldy called out, pushing buttons and trying to bring the cloak back online. "There's too many darts for our mini-drones, and we're not gonna be able to outflank both the bombardment  _and_  the darts!"

John knew that.

* * *

" _Sir, that last hit almost triggered an overload in the Asgard core. We can't take anymore!"_ Novak's voice sounded over the speakers.

"Sir, our shields are down to 10 %..." Marks said. He glanced at the screen where the red rectangles seemed to multiply around the superhive's signature. "Darts are gathering around the Hive ship. They seem to be forming a wall…"

The bridge crew waited with almost bated breath as Caldwell stared at the superhive, his face grim. They knew the odds, they knew the difficult decision their commanding officer would have to make. They knew they wouldn't hesitate if he told them to stick to it, to give Sheppard and any surviving settlers a chance to pull through.

Even so, Marks felt an ounce of relief when Caldwell finally made his decision.

* * *

" _Sheppard, this is Caldwell."_ The connection sparked with interference. _"We've lost Asgard weapons, and our shield's failing. We're pulling back… You should do the same."_

Staring as the valley burst into flames from the ongoing bombardment, the mountains exploding into pieces of molten rocks and splintered vegetation, John found words difficult. "…Copy that."

He didn't bother logging off. Procedure was the last thing on his mind. The flames of the forest fire rose into the sky from the bottom of the valley. Wraith darts circled the reddish smoke like black birds of prey, weaving in and out of the relentless, brutal bluish rain. Sounds drifted to the background. He barely heard Teldy asking him for orders. He did hear one of the medics crying.

Had Reika cried too when the Wraith attacked her village, brutally killing her friends and family?

Finally, John couldn't watch it anymore. He turned his back from it, eyes meeting Ronon's. He knew what had to be done.

"Return to base," he said. The Jumper was silent. The medic momentarily stopped crying. Everyone looked at him. John clenched his fists, nails digging into his palms. "There's nothing more we can do here now."

* * *

It was deathly quiet on the once bustling planet. As she walked over charred ground, gazing at the smouldering wooden skeletons crumbling before her eyes, Sam had never felt more out of synch. It was as if someone else was moving her body and she was simply a bystander - watching herself give orders and never pausing to spend a moment in silent respect.

Up ahead, John stood with a few soldiers, gesturing solemnly to a pile of debris where a pale hand was sticking out, unmoving. Without speaking, the soldiers moved to the pile, leaning down to pull up the larger pieces of still-smoking wood. John stared after them, then turned around with a downcast look. As he raised his head, their eyes met and Sam felt her chest constrict at the hard, tight-lipped expression on John's face. It mirrored her own, and John's face grew intense.

They kept their eyes trained on each other, Sam hardly breathing. Her joints were locked, but she was restless. When John's eyebrows furrowed, so did hers, like a million words passing between them unspoken. Like time had stopped and they found themselves doing that old silent dance, the one they'd danced before everything was torn to pieces.

The crash of something heavy broke them out of the spell.

"Watch out, they're starting to collapse!" Someone was shouting, but in the chaos of moving people that followed, Sam had no idea who it was. She hastily got away from the wooden structure closest to her, and met up with the main group right outside the ruins.

Watching the last structures crumble and groan, either falling over sideways or on top of itself, Sam felt a chill run down her spine. Looking down, she saw her hands had fisted, but she was numb to the pain of nails digging into her palms.

As she tipped her chin up again, Sam realised John was right beside her. His clenched hands hung at his sides, his eyes transfixed on the destruction that was happening right in front of their eyes.

He was so close. Like when they lost Earth. When she wanted to grasp his hand in the gateroom and drop all pretences, even with General O'Neil watching. Because they'd faced the end together then, and here it was – again.

Sam looked back at the scarred earth, a sudden lump forming in her throat. Feeling pathetic, she clenched her fists tightly, resisting the subtle magnetic pull towards his hand, and addressed John without looking at him. "Make sure the engineers have secured the scene before continuing the extraction of the bodies."

There was no reply.

Sam looked up. John was eyeing her up and down, finally resting on her face. His eyes were dark, hard, but for once… he didn't look at her with rage. It was almost like…if she tilted her head a little, that…

The lump in Sam's throat swelled suddenly and painfully.

"I'll make sure," said John finally, his voice dark. Then he withdrew, gesturing for the closest engineer to approach the scene. Like nothing had happened just then. Like he hadn't let her get a glimpse of the incredible, overwhelming pain he was feeling.

* * *

"You knew him?"

Reese looked up from her silent vigil by the covered gurney, her eyes blurry. Ramirez stood in the doorway of the room, his face void of amusement. He held a bottle in his hands.

"Sergeant." She turned away from him, flustered, and quickly wiped her wet cheeks. She sniffed and took a deep breath. "Um...yeah...I knew him. We were...uh, doolies together."

"Thompson, right?" Ramirez moved into the room.

Reese felt very self-conscious, checking her uniform and brushing her unruly hair out of her face. "Yeah. He...he was in the Jumper that..."

She couldn't say it, but Ramirez got the picture. They'd listened to the radio transmissions when it went down, and seen the place where it had crashed. Debris everywhere, and torn bodies that haunted her when she closed her eyes. No one had survived the crash. Reese had never felt so helpless, so... _useless_.

Ramirez stopped by the gurney, took a swig of his bottle, and then thrust it at her. It was whiskey, Jack Daniels. Reese never drank the heavy stuff, but... she realised it wasn't every day Ramirez stopped being a wise-ass.

"Thanks."

"No worries, Cap'n."

Reese realised he hadn't called her that since Sanders died. Keeping her breath under control, she held the bottle up to her lips and drank. The liquid burned in her throat, filling her with warmth from her stomach and out. When she coughed at the aftertaste, Ramirez chuckled. It made her smile embarrassedly.

It was a small step.

* * *

They'd found Reika's brother up in the mountains, along with five more children. They'd been fed upon.  _Daedalus_ hadn't been able to beam them up before the bombardment. One look at John, and Sam knew he felt guilty. He hadn't been able to reach them either. She wanted to tell him it wasn't his fault, but she was struggling to say the same words to herself.

_What had she done?_

An entire Pegasus settlement lost - apart from twelve lucky few. Eighteen Earthborn KIA, nine more injured. Four F-302s, one Jumper.  _Daedalus_  and the other Jumpers had taken quite a beating and would be undergoing extensive repairs.

And then there was Reika. The girl had been beamed up onto the  _Daedalus_ , but whether or not she was alive was debatable. Like her brother, she had been fed upon, but the process had been interrupted. Now, she was lying in a coma in Atlantis's infirmary. Keller didn't think she would make it.

Sam looked back over her shoulder, the active stargate ahead of her. John stood by the DHD, Ronon at his side. Their faces were still grimy and dirty from the previous night's battle and today's excavation. They hadn't changed from their battle gear. John was holding the P90 tightly in his hands.

She met his eyes again. Tears shimmered in hers. John's mask barely wavered now, his jaw set, but he shared a look with Ronon and took a step forward. He ascended the raised steps and took up position behind her, weapon still in hand.

Somehow, the action made Sam feel something  _more_. She turned back and tiredly faced the stargate.

All she wanted now was to get home, take a shower and clean herself of the smell and dirt she had become entrenched with. She was so tired, her head and body numb, that she almost didn't notice how deathly quiet the gate room became upon her exit from the stargate. Only when someone cleared their throat awkwardly did she become aware that everyone were either avoiding her glances or facing her surreptitiously, some even boldly.

The less bold withdrew from her and looked to the grand staircase. She turned and raised her head tiredly to find an impeccably dressed Xiaoyi standing on the top of the staircase, arms crossed with an incomprehensible expression on her face. Woolsey was nowhere to be seen.

"Colonel Carter," Xiaoyi greeted pointedly, raising a single eyebrow. "Could I have a word?"

Behind her, John took a step forward and Sam could feel his strong presence behind her. But that train had passed. She couldn't expect him to have her back.

Glancing at the mixture of civilians and military that had gathered in the gate room to meet the clean-up teams, Sam slowly unfroze and moved with heavy, knowing steps towards the staircase.

Xiaoyi went immediately to Sam's office, where Woolsey and Coolidge both stood up as Sam entered, their faces indiscernible. The Chinese woman didn't waste time, turning to face Sam and barely giving her time to close the door behind her.

"I'm sure you'll be happy to know that the Tikwee delegation has agreed to the terms of our negotiations," Xiaoyi said shortly. "We'll be able to set up mining operations on their secondary planet within the month."

Although she had waited to secure this deal for several months, Sam only felt a peripheral happiness. The deal paled in relationship to what had happened to the Kadarians.

"The Tikwee have one condition to this deal, however…" Xiaoyi continued, pausing for effect. Her eyes were hard. "Your resignation."

Sam didn't know what to say. She could only stare. Xiaoyi was leaning against her desk, arms crossed, a challenging look on her face. In the background, Woolsey stood silent, unmoving and not meeting her eyes, next to Coolidge, who wore a smug look on his face. The picture of SG-1 was nowhere to be seen.

"Colonel Caldwell has agreed to become our new military advisor on the council," Xiaoyi continued, "but he refused to accept command of this city. As such, the IOA will choose a suitable candidate from our civilian sector. You are welcome to submit a list of suggestions, Colonel. Being a high-ranking officer at both the SGC and Atlantis, you know many of these people very well. We'll value any candidate you'd like to support."

It was a joke. Sam stared at them. They didn't even mention the fifteen people she'd lost.

"As for your new position," said Coolidge, stepping forward, "You've been very interested in acquiring an off-world mining operations. I'm  _sure_  a woman of your...qualities...will handle such a task  _excellently_."

Sam's eyes moved to Woolsey. He didn't say anything. She almost shook her head in disbelief. Slowly, Sam broke out of her frozen stance. She moved to the back door, waving her hand automatically over the controls. Her feet took her across the threshold and down the dimmed corridor. The door closed behind her and Sam didn't look back. There was no point.

* * *

 

 

  
**Next:**  "I give up."

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter marks the midway point, storywise. Big changes are coming, as you've seen, as well as flashbacks to a certain budding friendship and relationship. Next chapter will be a direct follow-up. People are coming to the breaking point, and it's gonna get noticed.


	12. DAY 111-112

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is the last of several final blows. Sam's disappeared and John's trying to figure out what's happened. He's not liking what he sees.

 

****

* * *

**ELEVEN | "I give up."**

_Prompt: a time to weep_

* * *

**DAY 111**

Hurrying down the crowded corridor, John pushed the earpiece radio further into his ear. “I swear, Sam, if you don’t say something right now I’m gonna—Argh!“ 

A high-pitched whine of static tore straight through his eardrums. John pulled the offending piece out of his ear, cursing beneath his breath. What the hell was she up to?

He looked around and spotted a familiar balding head in a _Daedalus_ jumpsuit up ahead. John quickly broke into a jog, following Caldwell as he veered off down a less crowded corridor. "Colonel!”

Caldwell spared him a glance over his shoulder, but didn’t break his stride.

“What the hell's going on?” John asked when he’d caught up. “Sam's not answering her radio, and now Woolsey's calling us to the conference room for a _casual_ meeting?” Shoulder to shoulder now, John was able to notice the grimness in Caldwell’s face. He narrowed his eyes. “What do you know?"

"Less than you, I'm sure," said Caldwell, skirting his eyes ahead of them. A few Airmen passed them with salutes. He nodded and moved on, his pace brisk and with a purpose.

"The hell you do." John's hands clenched at his sides. He was tempted to pull the bald man aside for a 'private' talk. "You've _always_ known what's going on, even when you haven't been around. What'd they _do_?"

"Look, Sheppard, this isn't the time or place—" Caldwell halted as a female scientist hurried around a corner, her hands filled with fibre-optic wires.

John recognised her as one of the former SGC's science team – Michelle something. McKay had complained about her on occasion. She gave them both a deer-in-headlights look before quickly scurrying off. Caldwell stared after her with narrowed eyes – making sure she was out of earshot – before he silently gestured John to keep up.

They reached the bottom of the staircase leading to the back of the operations centre. Caldwell stopped and glanced over his shoulder. Seeing no one, he continued in a low voice, "Look, we don't have time right now. Just… Whatever you hear in there, _don't lose your cool_."

"That's not exactly _reassuring_ —"

"Trust me, it's important," said Caldwell brusquely. "Things happened quicker than I anticipated. We'll have to be careful or it's all gonna go to hell."

"What are—" John started, but Caldwell had already turned and bounded up the stairs two steps at a time. John had no choice but to follow, struggling to keep his temper and his questions in check.

They reached the operations centre, John close on Caldwell's heels. The technicians looked up as they passed by silently. John again noticed the abrupt change in atmosphere that had met them when they returned from Kadara an hour ago. It was _tense_ – the kind of tense that put him on edge and made him itch for his sidearm. Something had happened while they'd been off-world, and no one was talking, not even Chuck. John had never felt like an intruder on Atlantis before, but this came close.

A moment later, they strode into the conference room. The other council members were already there with the addition of Woolsey and Coolidge seated on either side of Xiaoyi. Made up of the former senior staff and department heads, the addition of the IOA made for a full council room. McKay looked confused and a bit miffed – probably interrupted in the middle of something – and Keller looked like she wanted to be anywhere else. She still had patients - some in life-threatening conditions, like the Kadarian kids. The rest wore mixed expressions; one even grinned openly at Coolidge.

John noticed that Sam was nowhere to be seen. He sat down between Caldwell and McKay, sparing a glance at Xiaoyi, who pushed the button to close the doors. His frown deepened and his neck tensed. Caldwell's words of warning rang in his head. What was going on?

The doors closed and Xiaoyi leaned forward. "I am happy to see everyone made it here, even on such short notice. Once you hear what we have to say, I am sure you'll understand the urgency of this meeting."

She gestured to Coolidge, who took her cue. John thought he looked smug. "As of today," Coolidge said, barely keeping his grin in check, "Colonel Carter has resigned her command of this city. Until a new leader is chosen, the IOA will be in charge during the interim period."

" _What?"_ John's eyebrows shot to the roof. To his side, Caldwell shot him a sharp glance, but John ignored him. "Sam would never—"

"It's true, Colonel," interjected Woolsey, his voice careful. "As you know, Atlantis has been in negotiations with the Tikwee about a possible mining operation on their second planet, home to one of their colonies. I think Dr McKay will agree when I say we desperately _need_ those resources if Atlantis is to support itself in the future."

At this point, Woolsey glanced at McKay, who sat open-mouthed and dumbfounded. He slowly closed his mouth, his eyes still wide. "Uh—um—yes, well, of course we need—I mean—Sam and I talked about it for _months_ —but I didn't—really? She just... _resigned_?"

"Not entirely willingly, I will admit," said Woolsey.

"It was part of the Tikwee's conditions before accepting our deal," said Xiaoyi unhurriedly, sparing a glance at Woolsey before turning to McKay. "They have been fooled once before by a military regime and caught the bad end of their deal. The Genii," she added in explanation, and a wave of knowing seemed to ripple through the room. "As I'm sure you'll understand, as long as Atlantis is under military command, we will not be successful in our negotiations. Finding another colony willing to agree to our terms will take too long. Colonel Carter thus agreed to give up her command so that we would be able to acquire the mining operation."

John almost burst out of his seat, but Caldwell interrupted him. "In the absence of Colonel Carter, and as long as _Daedalus_ is docked for repairs, all military issues are to be addressed to me." He shot a particular look at John, who narrowed his eyes. He couldn't believe this was happening.

Caldwell continued unfazed. "The resources we'll get from the mining operation will enable Atlantis to manufacture our own materials – ammunition, armour, energy devices, and equipment. Becoming self-sustained is _vital_ to our survival," he added and looked at everyone around the table. Many of them nodded in agreement, even those John knew sided with the IOA. "We can't rely on our allies. Not with the Wraith superhive around waiting to catch us."

_This is a waste of time._

John's hands clenched under the table and his face tightened in repressed anger as he bowed his head. _No way_ Sam went willingly. This was a dirty, under-handed coup d'état. The smug look on Coolidge's face said it all. The IOA had finally wrestled command back into their hands, and they'd brought Caldwell into it as well. Sam had been completely sidelined.

John felt like punching someone. Coolidge’s overgrown nose was a temping target.

"Any other _news_ you wanna share with us?" John raised his chin, locking eyes with the top three IOA representatives.

Woolsey withdrew his eyes almost immediately. Xiaoyi and Coolidge gave each other a glance, and – _no surprise there_ – Xiaoyi chose to respond.

"No other news, but a suggestion." Xiaoyi paused, looked at everyone, and then continued. "Right now, the people in this city are grieving the loss of fifteen colleagues and friends. I'd like to suggest that we keep the news about the change in command quiet for now. These people do not need any more…worries…at the moment."

John opened his mouth to argue, but Caldwell jumped in and closed the proceedings. "I agree," he said, nodding at Xiaoyi. "We shouldn't let this matter stop us from doing our jobs."

Again, Caldwell glanced at John as if it should mean something. John didn't know what _anything_ meant anymore. 

* * *

"You sure you haven't seen her?"

"I'm sorry, Dr Jackson.” Major Lorne gave him an apologetic look.

Daniel sighed deeply. He stood in the middle of the gateroom, newly arrived from New Athos. Engineers and soldiers were cleaning up crates and equipment that'd been used on Kadara to excavate the dead – no one had been left alive in the ruins.

It was unreal. It was less than a week since he'd talked to the Kadarians, and now they were simply gone, along with fifteen Earth-born. Daniel couldn't believe it. He wanted someone to confirm it and that someone was Sam. Only she'd seemingly dropped off the grid. Her radio was dead.

Daniel saw the conference room doors open on the second level of the gateroom. John was the first to exit. There was a dark expression on his face that Daniel had seen countless times before in soldiers about to face combat. Before he could think of why, the entire Atlantis council filed out of the room – except Sam.

When the top three IOA representatives exited last along with Colonel Caldwell – talking in confident, hushed tones – Daniel felt a sudden, stomach-turning uneasiness spread throughout his body. He looked back at John, who was descending the grand staircase in a storm.

What the…?

"Colonel!" Daniel hurried towards the grand staircase and met John at the bottom. He blinked at Daniel twice as if broken out of a spell.

"Jackson." John’s voice was wary. He glanced over his shoulder, notably following the quartet on the second level with his eyes as they walked towards Sam’s office, Xiaoyi in the lead. "I thought you weren't due back 'till tomorrow."

"We came as soon as we heard the news about the Kadarians," Daniel said. "Teyla's down in the infirmary."

He paused, suddenly hesitant. John was still grim-faced, his hands white-knuckled and tense at his sides. He barely met Daniel’s eyes, staring instead at Lorne directing the clean-up in the gateroom. The question about the state of things dropped from Daniel's mind. He opted for his other objective instead.

"Look, Sam's not answering her radio, and no one's seen her…" He drifted off on an inquisitive tone. John didn't respond, but his expression darkened. Daniel bit his lip and stepped closer. It might be more personal than their level of acquaintance, but he was worried, especially as there'd obviously been a council meeting Sam wasn't part of. "John, what's going on? Was Sam hurt during the excavation?"

John broke out of his trance, turning fully towards Daniel. He shot a look up at the walkway between the operations centre and Sam's office. Daniel up and saw Woolsey and Caldwell staring down at them, their expressions blank.

"Sam's just... taking a break," John said finally, but Daniel heard the elusive tone in his voice. Before he could challenge him, however, John had stepped away from the staircase and turned towards the exit.

Stunned for a moment, Daniel soon followed close behind, not satisfied with such a ridiculous claim. He caught up to the lieutenant colonel in a deserted hallway not far from the transporter.

"You expect me to believe that?" Daniel called after him. "I've known her for a long time, John. Sam wouldn't just disappear like this when people need her. You know that too."

John didn’t look at him. "What I know doesn't mean squat anymore. There's not a _damn_ thing I can do about it anyhow."

Daniel frowned. The wheels in his head went into overdrive. "This isn't just about Kadara and the Wraith, is it?" John didn't reply. He kept striding towards the transporter. " _Is it_?"

John halted abruptly in front of the transporter, twisting on his heel to face Daniel. His voice growled with repressed rage. "They _kicked_ her out, Jackson! _Five minutes_ after we got back. They didn't even have the decency to wait until _this damn thing_ was over!"

Daniel's eyes widened in surprise. He didn't need to ask who 'they' were. That much had always been apparent. He closed his open mouth, gathering his wits. Eventually, he looked up at John again. The lieutenant colonel was staring at the wall, his jaw set. "So she's…"

"Private.” John's voice was low, quiet. “Dunno where."

Daniel nodded, agreeing with John's assessment. Sam was usually a strong woman, but a blow like this… More than a month ago she'd been hiding away in a storage room seeking company in Earth paraphernalia. She wouldn't let anyone see how far down she’d come. The Kadarians had helped bring her sanity back and Daniel just didn't know what to think now.

"Guess it's really gone to hell, huh?" He sighed deeply, meeting John's dark eyes.

John didn't reply, resuming his mixed stare on the walls – fists clenched at his sides. Deciding nothing more could be done here, Daniel slowly went past him towards the forgotten transporter. He raised his hand above the door controls.

"Jackson."

Daniel turned back as the doors opened behind him. John met his eyes, his anger gone and replaced by…something indecipherable. "You mind if I join you?"

* * *

As they walked down the non-descript corridors and staircases, the afternoon light heavy on the reddish floors, John was overcome with a sense of familiarity. Even if the design was no less peculiar than in the other towers, John's eyes swept the corridor for the small, tell-tale marks that told him they were on the right track. Cracks in the windows. Burns from an overloaded circuit. Air from a nearby vent. They all brought back the memories.

It seemed like ages ago, and yet…not. It rattled John. For three months, the eyes he'd seen in his mind at night were hard and cold. It made him able to block out the rest. The short, blissful memories. Today, however, when he'd seen Sam among the Kadarian ruins… Even though she wore the signature leather uniform, Colonel Carter wasn't there. It was just Sam, with tears in her beautiful blue eyes.

John’s jaw set stoically. He'd never seen her cry before. Two years of friendship and a few months as something more…and she'd never let him get that close. Not even when she got back from General Hammond’s funeral, clearly distraught, and he held her close all night. Maybe she'd never trusted him with that vulnerability. It’s the only reason that made sense.

"Here we are,” said Jackson.

John looked up, half-surprised they were already in front of Sam's quarters. He forced his hands to relax at his sides as Jackson stepped in front of the door controls. The archaeologist raised his hand, then hesitated and looked back at John.

John understood the unspoken question. Was he ready? The wounds were still open. He still saw those damn cold eyes in his mind. But…recalling Sam's look before going through the stargate on New Kadara and the following events, John realised he couldn't stay out of this any longer. This wasn't about them, or past memories. It was just professional. A 2IC checking up on his CO, who just happened to have been jousted out of her saddle by the worst kind of gang.

John nodded and took up position slightly to the side, so that all attention would be drawn to Jackson first. Jackson turned back to the door and finally waved his hand over the controls, which responded to his induced ATA gene.

The door slid open immediately.

"Uh… Sam?" Frowning, Jackson called into the darkened quarters from the doorway. "Sam, you there?"

There was no reply. Jackson turned to him with a worried look. John stepped up to the doorway warily as Jackson took a hesitant step into the room. The lights suddenly came to life, and both of them froze in shock.

The place was trashed. Furniture lay broken and upturned. Clothes and books were scattered over it all, sheets of paper torn amidst broken glass, pottery, dirt and wooden splinters. The bookcase was thrown down upon the bed, the sheets slung in a heap against the wall. The tall flowerpot Sam had kept by the door lay smashed by an office chair. The blue flowers were shredded and scattered across the floor.

"Uhh... _schiebe,_ " Jackson gasped.

John's insides twisted. He couldn't find the words.

"Sam?" Jackson called again – his tone more desperate – as he moved into the room. " _Sam?_ " He went to the bathroom, popping his head in. John followed slowly behind, eyes sweeping across the destruction. A second later, Jackson returned, shaking his head with a deeply worried look. "She's not here."

John's eyes zeroed in on a nightstand with a missing door. It stood next to the bed, probably put back up again after the carnage. An assortment of pictures in broken frames stood on it. John recognised them all, _and_ their significance. "Well, she was."

"Huh?" Jackson looked up, and John pointed to the nightstand. The man's mouth opened in understanding. "Oh."

John began to pick his way through the mess, grimacing as pieces of glass crushed under his boots. He reached the other end of the room and stopped by the nightstand. Jackson came up next to him.

They surveyed the pictures silently. Unlike the portraits of Cassie, Sam's father and the others in Sam's office, these were more personal in nature. A barbeque action shot with Sam's brother and his family, with Sam holding up a burned chicken leg and pouting. A shot of Sam and her father laughing together at SGC's former Alpha site. A photo of Sam at Cassie's graduation, beaming proudly at the red-haired teen. Then a Christmas celebration with the original SG-1, in which Sam was unwrapping a Simpson figure of Professor Frink and looking dubious. And, standing behind all the other frames, a large photo of General O’Neill.

John stared at the picture of the grey-haired man, at the frame that’d been pushed together after being broken. His hands fisted and he withdrew from the nightstand suddenly, turning his back on it.

"John." He was halfway across the room when Jackson's voice broke through his unsettled mind.

He stopped and looked over his shoulder. "Wh—?"

The words halted in his mouth. In his palm, Jackson held a small glass container. Inside was a simple but beautiful carving of a bird, made from the bark of a tree that was common in the Pegasus galaxy. John had given it to Sam on her birthday last year. Just four days after they lost contact with Earth. When they were still…

"I'm surprised it survived," Jackson said, almost in wonder.

"We should try looking somewhere else." John cleared his throat, withdrawing his eyes from the well-preserved ornament. All sorts of memories threatened to overcome him.

Jackson put the glass container down on the shelf far from the epicentre of the mess – John's eyes followed the movement warily. Then Jackson straightened and scratched his neck. "I think I've got an idea where she might be." 

* * *

Caldwell strode past the technicians in the operations centre of Atlantis. Some of them barely spared him a glance, busy with their duties. Only the gate operator – Campbell – met his dark look above his console. The man knew why Caldwell was there, that much was apparent. This wasn't just the commander of _Daedalus_ checking in. The military personnel knew he was at the top now, and the significance of that.

Caldwell continued across the walkway leading to Carter's office. The blinds were half-drawn, but he saw the dark hair of the person seated behind the desk. He straightened his back and marched into the room, closing the door loudly behind him.

Xiaoyi almost jumped in her seat. She quickly closed the laptop in front of her. Her smile seemed strained. "Stephen."

"Did I interrupt something?" Caldwell crossed his arms across his chest, eyeing the non-descript laptop.

"No, no. Not at all. I'm just cleaning up some of Colonel Carter's things." Xiaoyi cleared away the folders she'd spread out beside the laptop. Caldwell noticed the SGC logo on the front, along with an unmistakable red stamp only associated with the office of Homeworld Security, before they disappeared.

His neck tensed. He hadn't seen _those_ since he’d last talked with… Caldwell eyed Xiaoyi carefully. Carter was supposed to have taken measures to protect the original content of those folders on General O’Neill’s orders. Only those with clearance were allowed to see the real files. Had she done it? Did Xiaoyi know? Did she suspect?

"There!" Xiaoyi smiled as she dumped the last folders in a brown cardboard box standing next to the desk. "Now, what can I do for you, Colonel?"

Caldwell's eyes went to the laptop Xiaoyi had been perusing when he'd entered. It looked like Sam's. He forced himself to relax, at least visibly. There was nothing he could do about Xiaoyi's curiosity. Not now. Not if he wanted to keep the support of those who still trusted him.

"I'm just here to give you an update," he said.

" _Daedalus?_ Yes, of course. How're the repairs going?" Xiaoyi leaned forward on her arms, her features calm once more.

"Good," Caldwell said. "The crew is getting help from Dr McKay and his team, so it should cut down the work time. So far, it's not looking as bad as we first expected. The shield and weapons upgrades we got last month saved us against the superhive. Depending on what materials are readily available, repairs should only take two or three weeks."

Xiaoyi smiled. "That is good news, Colonel. Then you will be able to join the closing part of our negotiations with the Tikwee." She located a folder in one of the drawers and pulled it out. "I have several points I would like to go over with you…"

"Go ahead. I've got time." Caldwell settled down in the chair opposite the desk. He forced himself to smile. 

* * *

"Is Colonel Carter here?" Daniel asked simply. The two guards nodded silently, stepping aside to give them space. One of them input the necessary code and the door opened. Daniel sighed, preparing himself for what laid ahead.

"Take a walk," John told the guards, motioning his head towards the corridor. "A _long_ walk."

The guards shared a glance, but didn't object. Holstering their stunner pistols, they walked away until they disappeared around a corner.

Just the two of them now, John stepped up to the doorway, but hesitated. Finally, he said, "I'll wait out here."

The pained expression of resignation and doubt in John’s eyes made Daniel sigh inwardly. Some other day, they'd have to handle _that_ matter too, but he couldn’t afford to think about that now.

_First things first: plug the holes._

"Okay," Daniel said, turning towards the supply room. After taking a deep breath, he crossed the threshold.

At first glance, the room looked undisturbed. Looking closer, however, Daniel saw that a small container lay open on the floor. Around it, tiny square pieces littered the ground. Daniel realised they were from the Rubik's Cube, broken from some kind of impact, just like the items in her quarters. He leaned down and picked up the biggest debris, gripping it in his hand. He sighed.

"Sam?"

His voice resonated in the quiet room. He couldn't see her anywhere, but there were plenty of containers to hide between. At least he knew she was here. He'd half-expected it, especially after seeing her quarters. She'd admitted previously that something about this room brought her comfort.

Daniel stepped slowly forward, his ears perked for any sound. Something stirred and he turned towards it. "Sam?"

Someone sniffled. Daniel hurried up to two large rows of steel containers. Sam sat hunched between them, leaning against the wall with her legs close to her chest. Her face was buried in her arms. Daniel almost didn't see her at first; one of the containers blocked the overhead light.

His chest constricted. " _Sam…_ "

Sam raised her head tiredly. A stream of light revealed red eyes and cheeks, fresh tear tracks running down her skin. Her hair was dishevelled, sticking out of her usual braid. She wore a dirty leather uniform that was torn to shreds – probably from the destruction she'd given her quarters, or the clean up on Kadara.

"They took my picture, Daniel _,"_ she croaked, her eyes big and watery. "I—I couldn't find it. The one from…Jack's cabin last year." She scrunched up her face to stop from crying, but tears still ran down her cheeks. Daniel's heart sank in realisation. It'd been Sam's favourite picture; a memory of the last time they’d all been together. 

Sam shook her head listlessly. "I-I can't do it anymore _,"_ she continued hoarsely. "I just—I _can't_ do it… I—I give up. They win."

The words stopped as Sam's breath hitched. Daniel put the remains of the Rubik's Cube onto a nearby container and sat down in front of her. He sighed as he nudged her forward, " _Hey..."_

Sam sank into his arms at once, her body trembling with silent sobs. Daniel kissed the top of her head and tightened his hug. "Shh, it's okay. It's okay. We'll…we'll find it." 

* * *

The back of John's head banged against the corridor wall. His stomach dropped into his gullet and constricted his throat at the same time. He didn't mean to eavesdrop – he was just closing the door to give them some privacy. He hadn't been quick enough.

Sam's picture… He remembered it vividly. She’d spent hours looking at it when she didn't think anyone saw her. John had. More times than he cared to remember. He’d even been jealous of it…

Stumbling away, suddenly feeling his lungs tremble, John looked at his hands as he fought the hyperventilation. They tensed into white knuckled claws, trembling even as he tried to stay still. His legs quivered and his gut convulsed involuntarily. John tightened his jaw, formed a fist with his right hand and punched the wall behind him. He grimaced, but not for his own pain as his knuckles cut open. The emotion he'd heard in Sam's voice… It haunted him, like her cold, hard eyes had once done.

" _I guess this is it…Colonel."_

John forced his fists to relax. He pushed off the wall, still shaking uncontrollably. He could feel his muscles on fire and his shoulders pumped up, his head lowering into a wolf-like stance. After all that'd happened, Sam didn't deserve this. It was a low blow – the final one – and the people responsible were going to answer for it.

He glanced at the closed supply room door. Jackson was with her. She had the guy she needed. But Jackson couldn't threaten someone into talking even if his life depended on it. That was John's speciality. He didn't even have to wonder which of the idiots had done it. That much was glaringly obvious.

He set off down the corridor without a backward glance, his veins burning with adrenaline. 

* * *

"What a load of junk." Coolidge scoffed as he shuffled through the cardboard boxes standing on the floor.

Shen raised an eyebrow in concern. "Those are Colonel Carter's personal items, James. You shouldn't be doing that."

Coolidge snorted. He picked up a Greek-looking vase and held it up in his hand. "She's not here to complain, is she? Besides," he added, turning to glance at her as he threw the vase from hand to hand. "You've been sneaking into her files."

Shen cleared her throat uncomfortably, straightening in the office chair. "That was different," she said cautiously, glancing at the technicians in the operations centre. The door was ajar, and anyone could hear. She lowered her voice as she continued, "We both agreed that we've been kept out of the dark for too long. Not that it matters, as the files didn't reveal anything, and her laptop's encrypted. She's most likely hidden the real papers."

"Along with the location of the last ZPM. Carter's taking a lot of secrets with her," said Coolidge angrily. He gripped the vase with both hands, his eyes glinting. Shen's eyebrows creased in worry.

"As is to be expected." She got to her feet and took the vase from him. "We've all got secrets." She put the vase back in its box and sat back down.

"That's true." Coolidge nodded, moving behind the desk. He played with the top of her chair – something Shen wasn't too sure what to make of. She shifted uneasily in her seat and glanced over her shoulder. The man's behaviour had changed recently, and it worried her, but he was still part of the higher ranks in the IOA. She couldn't just ignore him.

"What is it?"

"Just found a way to remember home. That's all." Coolidge sighed, releasing the top of the chair. He turned away from the desk and sauntered back towards the cardboard boxes.

Shen spared him an uncertain glance before noticing movement in the corner of her eye. She looked up and saw Colonel Sheppard striding across the walkway from the OpCentre, his hard eyes set on the glass door.

"James," Shen called out lowly in warning, just before Sheppard entered the room and closed the door behind him. She quickly turned her attention to him, giving him a raised eyebrow. "Colonel Sheppard, to what do we owe the—"

Shen's eyes widened as Sheppard ignored her and went straight for Coolidge. She saw the hard, furious look in his eyes and jumped to her feet, but it was too late.

In a flash, Coolidge looked up, only to find himself lifted off the ground like a sack of potatoes. Sheppard pulled back in a roll and flung the much smaller man through the closed glass door, shattering it into a million fragments.

Coolidge groaned loudly as he slammed into the ground, and Sheppard was upon him in an instant.

"Where is it, you son of bitch!" Sheppard screamed as he punched the man into the floor. " _Where is it?_ "

"Colonel Sheppard!"

Shen rounded the desk and approached the enraged colonel, but the man swung back and pointed at her warningly. "Stay out of this!"

Shen halted half-step, her heart racing. Some of the technicians in the OpCentre had gathered at the other edge of the catwalk. Shen saw Chuck hold them back, clearly not wanting to get too close to the enraged lieutenant colonel.

“Tell me, you _goddamned_ bastard.” Eyes dark and narrow, Sheppard turned back to Coolidge, who was wide-eyed and frightened. A bruise was forming around his left ey _e. "_ Tell me where it is!" Sheppard tightened his grip on Coolidge's collar and lifted him up and onto the railing. "Tell me or so help me God I _will_ throw you off this bridge!"

Coolidge opened and closed his mouth several times before any sound escaped. All colour had drained from his face. "It's—it's in my—my room!"

Sheppard heaved him further over the railing with a disgusted sound. He pushed his face up close to Coolidge's, growling, "Show me!"

"Yes, _yes_!" Coolidge whimpered, and Sheppard finally pulled him back from the brink. He let the man down, but still looked enraged. Coolidge picked himself up timidly, staring at Shen for help, but she remained in her place, quiet and wary. Then he scurried out and past the gathered group of technicians that made a hole for them to pass through, with Sheppard close on his heels.

Shen glanced to the OpCentre again. Chuck stood at the head of the group holding them back with raised arms. Miss Banks was wide-eyed but in position to move in if needed to assist Chuck. The display wasn’t lost on her.

"You should get back to work," Shen told them calmly, then looked at the destroyed glass door and sighed.

 _Wonderful._  

* * *

A tired but grim-faced John stood in the doorway when Jackson answered the buzzer. He was still shaking, slowly coming down from the surge of adrenaline. The implications of what he'd done still hadn't seeped in, but at least he'd taken Coolidge to the infirmary after he'd retrieved his objective. He showed the archaeologist the framed SG-1 picture in his hand, which was still mildly trembling and bloody from the savage attack.

"You found it," stated Jackson, his eyes wide in surprise. John didn't blame him for his shock.

"Yeah," John said awkwardly, unwilling to reveal all the details. He clenched his spare hand, recalling the satisfaction of putting the fear of God into Coolidge. For once, he’d actually _done_ something. His hand ached terribly, but in a good way. "It won't disappear again."

Jackson seemed to catch on to the serious tone in John's voice, as if the blood and bruises weren't enough. He smiled uneasily. "Good." He scratched his head, dragging the silence on, before clearing his throat. "Uh… You wanna come in? Sam's asleep, but uh…" His voice faltered and he stepped aside instead, gesturing for John to enter.

John hesitated. He stared into Sam's quarters from the doorway – now restored to its somewhat clean appearance again, although the dirt and glass had simply been swept to the side. His eyes went to the woman herself, curled up beneath a blanket on the bed. The red cheeks were obvious on her pale skin. But that peaceful, sleepy look…

 

 

XXX 

_The stars illuminated her face through the open window. John brushed a stray hair away from her face. Her nose scrunched up and she began to stir. John quickly stilled, his breath caught in his throat, but Sam didn't wake up. Fortunately._

_She needed her sleep. It'd been a tough day; a lot of people hadn't appreciated learning they couldn't go home for Christmas as planned. They wanted to know why, but Sam couldn't tell them. She'd just gotten a message from General O'Neill saying all passes had been revoked. Probably something to do with the Wraith Hive ships headed their way, though. They needed all hands on deck._

_John smiled. She was rather cute. The way she softly snored, the way she clutched the pillow underneath her head – she wasn't as graceful as Nancy, but it was just her way. Sam was Sam. She was—_

 

 

 XXX

John snapped out of it. His pulse had quickened. He clutched the picture frame tighter between his fingers.

Jackson looked at him with knowing, almost sad, eyes, and John cursed inwardly. He thrust the picture at the other man. "Here. You can give it to her when she wakes up."

"She should know it comes from you." Jackson shook his head and held his palms up.

"C'mon, Jackson. Just—just give it to her." John's annoyance flashed up, and he tried to thrust it at the other man again, but Jackson stepped out of reach.

"No."

Slowly, Jackson backpedalled further into the room, leaving John with no other choice but to follow. Then the doors closed behind him with a familiar _whoosh_ , and he was trapped. Silent, Jackson went to lean on the nearby desk, his arms crossed as he stared at the woman in the bed. The message was clear.

Sighing, John caved. He stepped forward, self-conscious. As he approached the nightstand – still missing its door – he saw the pictures had been removed and put into the bookcase. Only an alarm clock with a cracked plastic covering was left.

He glanced at Sam, still fast asleep. She was almost like he remembered. Up close, she looked tired and defeated, her face thin and pale. Her eyes moved under her lids, twitching as if flinching. He knew she'd lost weight lately, but only now did he see how much.

There was something fragile about her. Not the strong Colonel Carter he'd befriended, nor the Sam he'd gotten closer to no matter how much he tried to avoid it. She was…

A stray lock of hair caressed her brow, but John restrained his restless, bruised hand. Instead, he put the frame with the happy SG-1 past and present down on the nightstand. Sam didn't stir. Next, John stepped back and prepared to leave.

Something in the bookcase caught his eye, however. It was the bird in the glass container. It stood proudly side-by-side the other pictures, including the portrait of General O'Neill.

John halted, eyes fixed on the intricate but simple bird of bark. Slowly, he reached out and took the container. It was just a thought, but… Glancing back at Sam again, he straightened his back determinedly. He strode back to the nightstand quickly and put the container down by the picture.

Then he left without another word. In his wake, Jackson smiled.

* * *

 

 

**DAY 112**

Sam woke to a room filled with bright light. It was hot and stuffy even though someone had propped the window open. She winced as she sat up, clutching her throbbing head. It felt like she'd been probed by Fifth again. Not happy with that particular thought, Sam groaned.

“Oh, you're awake.” Something rustled nearby. "Sleep well?"

Sam blinked away sleepy tears, finally spotting her old friend. Daniel sat down on the edge of her bed with a comforting smile. He looked like he'd been awake all night. He still wore the clothes from last night and held a cup of something steaming – coffee, by the smell of it.

"Think so." Sam grimaced as her head continued to throb. "Although my head's killing me."

“Water and painkillers.” Daniel gestured to the nightstand while sipping his coffee. "Figured you'd need it."

Sam glanced at the nightstand and saw the water glass and pack of painkillers mentioned. Her eyes widened, though, as she spotted the picture frame behind them.

"You found it?" She forgot about the headache, grasping the picture frame and holding it between her hands. Her voice filled with wonder. She traced the familiar faces with one finger, smiling broadly. " _Thank you_."

"Wasn't me."

Sam looked up at Daniel, who simply pointed to the nightstand again. Frowning, Sam looked back. Her breath caught in her throat when she saw what Daniel was pointing at. Slowly, she left the SG-1 picture in her lap and picked up the glass container with both hands. The bird was still beautiful.

“Heard he almost threw Coolidge off a bridge.” Daniel wore a knowing smile, his eyes twinkling. "I think he's telling you not to give up, Sam."

Sam could only grin.

* * *

Storming into his office, John almost threw the folder into the wall. Twenty-four hours and the IOA had already supplied the department heads with enough paperwork to give them a lasting headache. Requests denied, orders given, budget cuts – or their current equivalent of it anyhow: John felt like his head was going to explode.

He dumped the folder onto his desk with a frustrated groan, and sat down in his squeaky office chair. He rubbed his face with both hands. They still ached, bruised and cut, but John didn't mind. Somehow he'd been able to get off with only a warning from Caldwell. Xiaoyi hadn't even said a word. Coolidge didn't push it either. It was all good. Well, relatively speaking.

Once the frustration ebbed away, John opened his eyes and leaned forward to get cracking on the paperwork, but halted abruptly.

An unaddressed letter laid on the desktop. John unsealed it with a frown. Inside was a standard-looking flash drive, along with a small handwritten note. John glanced at the closed door and then picked up the note. It just said, _'Thank you'_ , but in very familiar writing.

Sam had been here.

Suddenly, John felt very uneasy. He eyed the flash drive, read the note again, and then turned on his computer. As soon as it was up and running, he inserted the flash drive and waited for the computer to recognise it. A folder window popped up with a single file on it. John clicked it and waited.

Images began to appear. Blue schematics with white drawings and fragments of text, with something looking like a stargate at the centre. Equations. Names of familiar and unfamiliar mechanical parts. Ratios. Energy capacitors. It was all dated four days ago. With implicit instructions to erase after reading.

John's eyes widened in surprise when realisation set in. Then he looked at the note again, as if he saw it in a new light.

* * *

  
**Next:** "Think only this of me..."

* * *


	13. DAY 123

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After all that's happened, it's time to pick up the pieces and move on. It all starts with a small step...

 

****

* * *

**TWELVE | "Think only this of me..."**

_Prompt: a time to heal  
Music: "Photo montage" – from We Were Soldiers OST, Nick Glennie-Smith_

* * *

**DAY 123**

"Oh, I’m sorry, ma'am." Reese quickly got down on all fours and began picking up the apples that had escaped from the dropped paper bag.

Colonel Carter got down next to her, waving dismissively. "It's alright, Matthews. I didn't see where I was going." She smiled, holding up the bag as Reese put the apples back in it. "Thank you."

They both stood up, Reese struggling to contain her blush.

"Still, ma'am. I’m sorry." Off to the side, Ramirez fought to stop grinning – it looked like he was losing. Annoyance flashed through Reese, but she'd deal with the sergeant later and turned to Carter. "D'you want me to get new ones for you, ma’am?"

The colonel shook her head, adjusting her grip on the paper bag so it wouldn't drop again. "No, no, they're fine. Just go in and enjoy your breakfast, Captain."

"Thank you, ma'am. Have a nice day," Reese called after her as the colonel waved and disappeared around a corner. Then she face-palmed herself and groaned. " _Oh my god…"_

"You had a nice tackle there, Cap'n. You play football?" Ramirez smirked, then jumped away to avoid Reese's lashed-out punch. He chuckled.

"Shut your face, Sergeant," Reese warned him lowly.

She breezed past him and into what people now called the Little Chow. It was one of the smaller mess halls, established after the SGC evacuation due to the increased population and retained even after the Pegasus natives were relocated. It was perfect for those who wanted to avoid the crowds.

Ramirez continued to wear a smug look until they'd found their food and sat down. Consciously aware that people shot them curious looks, Reese buried her face in her food for the next five minutes. Once she felt the embarrassment pass, she looked up. Ramirez still looked amused when he met her eyes, but the expression changed as he ate his sandwich.

"Y'know," Ramirez began, chewing openly as he spoke, "I haven't seen Carter in a while."

"She’s probably been busy." Reese grimaced at the man's eating habits. Why did men have to be so…gross?

"With what? You said that everything's going straight to Caldwell or Sheppard these days. I even heard that one of those IOA types has moved into her office.” Ramirez met her eyes. “You know what that sounds like, right?”

"When did you start listening to rumours, Sergeant?" Reese glanced around the half-filled mess hall. There was a mix of military and civilian patrons present. She'd long ago realised people sided either with or against Carter, and she distrusted the civilians most of all. It made her uneasy to speak of this particular subject in public, so she lowered her voice. “Maybe she’s just taking a break.”

Ramirez shrugged, taking another large bite of his sandwich. "It's odd, though."

"What do you mean?"

Ramirez swallowed the bite almost whole before he explained, "A few months ago that IOA guy was screaming some shit about Carter's performance and threatening to take her command away. Now someone else is in her office, Colonel Caldwell's roaming about like he's the boss, and Carter's fallen off the radar. It's _odd_."

"Well, _I_ heard Carter's lost it."

Reese startled and looked up as Eileen Kerrick sat down beside Ramirez with her own plate of food. The Irish-born engineer leaned closer, her face filled with conspiratorial delight. "Apparently, she got crazy when all those Kadarians died and they had to replace her."

"She didn't look too bad when we ran into her earlier," defended Reese, unable to stay clear of the topic. "She seemed normal."

Kerrick scoffed, waving her fork about. " _Normal_! The woman's like a fuckin' ghost. The last time anyone I know saw our _supposed_ commanding officer is when she tucked her tail between her legs and ran off after the clean-up on Kadara."

"Oh, come on! Everyone's saying they heard that from someone who'd been there," retorted Reese hotly. "It doesn't mean it's true. It certainly doesn't prove she's crazy!"

"Oh yeah?" Kerrick gave Reese a narrowed look. "Then how 'bout I tell you she trashed up one of the storage rooms after the attack? I saw that. That somethin' a _normal_ person would do? Let alone our commandin' officer?"

"I heard it was the IOA man's quarters," said Jerry Stevenson quietly as he sat down next to Reese with his food. Reese almost rolled her eyes – had they all somehow telepathically agreed to be here at the same time? "Coolidge, I think. He had to go to the infirmary and get three stitches."

"No, no, no— That was Sheppard.” Kerrick waved her skewered sausage at Stevenson. “He wacked the guy up in the gateroom and almost threw him off a balcony."

Stevenson frowned, pausing in his eating. "Are you sure? Michelle said Carter…"

Across the table, Ramirez looked even more thoughtful than usual. He met Reese's eyes as Stevenson and Kerrick began to argue back and forth – or at least Kerrick arguing and Stevenson stuttering out in defence.

"Whatever happened," Ramirez said finally, his baritone voice breaking through the argument, "no one's confirmed or denied anything. It's all just speculation."

Reese nodded in agreement. "We know what we need to do our jobs. Caldwell's at the top while _Daedalus_ is docked because he's got seniority. That should be enough."

A look at Kerrick and Stevenson showed that they were sceptical, but they didn't say anything else on the subject and resumed their eating. Reese sighed. The topic seemed destined to return. She didn't know when, only that when it _did_ return, it'd probably be even more explosive. These things had a habit to evolve that way. She’d have to work on putting out the fires before they got too out of hand.

However, when recalling Carter's behaviour earlier, Reese couldn't make it fit with all the things she'd heard. Was she crazy? Had she really trashed a place? Had she been kicked out of her office because of it? Carter had made some decisions in the past Reese didn't agree with, but…going as far as punching an IOA guy? It sounded far-fetched. Not the Colonel Carter of SGC legends. Then again, people had changed after Earth…

Reese sighed and picked at her food. Why couldn't these things just be simple? Better yet, why couldn't she just ignore them? Rumours were rumours. You couldn't trust them. She'd learned that long ago. …So why couldn't she stay away from them this time?

"Hey Cap'n." Reese looked up and realised the others had finished and were leaving the table. Across the table, Ramirez raised an eyebrow at her. "Didn't you say you had a Jumper to catch?"

Reese's stomach dropped. She closed her eyes and sighed.

"Yeah…"

* * *

"Carter."

Caldwell appeared suddenly at her side, startling her. Sam glanced at him sideways, holding the bag of apples under her arm. He'd forgone the jumpsuit in favour of the blue base uniform. The _Daedalus_ badge had been replaced by the Atlantis badge on his upper arms.

"You busy?" Caldwell asked without looking at her.

Sam thought of her destination and hesitated. But eventually, she sighed resignedly. "What's up?"

" _Daedalus's_ had a few minor setbacks," Caldwell said matter-of-factly, resuming a stride step-in-step with hers. "Looks like we'll be planetside for another week or so."

Although his tone was conversational, his subtext was anything but. Sam’s eyes skirted ahead uneasily. They were alone in the corridor and it didn't sound like anyone else was around the corner. Still… Even the walls had ears these days.

"What do you need?" Sam asked lowly, her readiness at high alert as they walked.

"As you probably heard, we finished the Tikwee negotiations yesterday. They estimate that we'll be able to start construction of the mining site on Tirana in another two weeks or so." Caldwell paused as they rounded a corner and faced yet another empty corridor, before seemingly relaxing a little.

"I heard." Sam's lips thinned as she stared stoically ahead and held back a frustrated breath. "After all, I've been assigned to administrate the site."

"I'm sure you'll do a great job," Caldwell said evenly, keeping his eyes up front, his shoulders slightly hunched. Suddenly, he halted and held Sam's elbow back, forcing her to do the same. "That said… We need to stop ignoring each other."

"What the _—?”_ Sam's anger flared up and she quickly shrugged off his hand. “What’re you talking about?”

Letting her go, Caldwell's hard eyes met hers and he lowered his voice. "I know you don't like this situation, Carter, but you can't keep hiding yourself away. People _need_ you."

“No, they don’t _.”_ That had already become startling clear to her. "They've got _you_. Now if you don't mind, I've got somewhere to be and I'm already late."

She began to turn and continue down the corridor, but Caldwell twisted her back, his face now dark with annoyance. "You're _disobeying_ a direct order?"

"You may have seniority, Caldwell—"

"I'm not talking about _me_ , Carter,” Caldwell hissed, looking over his shoulder. Seeing no one, he turned back and added lowly, “This is about something _far_ beyond our paygrades.”

Sam's eyes widened in realisation. Instantly, a memory jarred loose and flashed before her eyes:

_“I hate to drag you into this mess, Carter. Way beyond both our paygrades.” In the dark of her office, General O’Neill’s face was stoic on the laptop screen. “But here’s the deal…”_

Shocked, Sam stared at Caldwell and opened her mouth wordlessly.

His face grim, Caldwell released her and took a step back. His voice was low. "Tonight, 2200 hours. Don’t leave your quarters." 

* * *

The day was hot. Reese blinked against the bright sunlight and raised a hand to shield her eyes. It was already in the midst of summer on this planet. Back home, spring wouldn't have been over yet. She would've been out in the woods behind her house, relishing the blooming trees and bushes, and the wondrous smell of new life.

She'd offer to take the neighbour's dog for the weekend and then go for a run. She always enjoyed the company. There was a nice little forest path that led past a lake. In spring she'd see the ducklings learning to swim. Trisha loved it. The black retriever would set off for the lake and threaten to jump in unless Reese held her back.

_Good times._

Thinking about them made Reese smile. It struck her that she hadn't thought of Trisha in a long time, or the forest path behind her house in Colorado. Her whole world revolved around Atlantis now. Red metal walls, recycled air, workouts in the gym, and occasionally completely fresh food. She hadn't even worn her civvies since she got here.

Reese sighed and looked around her surroundings. The mainland was lush with far-reaching forests, a sandy beach and grass that grazed her thighs. Although the air felt thinner than what she'd been used to, it still smelled cleaner.

Funny how a place like this was only associated with death these days. No one went here unless they were visiting the graves of their comrades. Maybe the botanists, but Reese wouldn't know about that. She just knew Atlantis got fresh meat, fruits, berries, vegetables and wheat from the Pegasus settlers they'd relocated. The mainland wasn't used for growing or gathering food, at least not yet.

Around her, the graveyard was quiet and demure. A few people had come out on the Jumper with her and now sat by their fallen friends. Ramirez was off to the side, his back towards her as he looked down on Sanders' grave. She'd been surprised he even wanted to come. Then again, things had changed in the past two weeks.

Reese withdrew her eyes to give him some privacy. Instead, they went slowly to the stone in front of her, into which someone had carved the name Martin Thompson. His dog tag hung across it.

Reese swallowed the lump in her throat. She'd been so surprised to meet Thompson on Atlantis after the evacuation of SGC. She hadn't even known he was part of the stargate programme. Apparently he'd joined up four years ago. Almost as long as she'd been part of SGC, only he’d been on Atlantis. Small universe, huh?

Reese kneeled down and laid down the flowers she'd picked up on the way from the landing site. They weren't alone – someone had laid down fresh flowers for a while. Probably every day or so since the funeral two weeks ago. Somehow, it comforted her. Thompson had been kind of a loner back at the Academy. They both had.

Her head filled with memories. Reese bit her lip to hold back the lump in her throat. Tears sprung to her eyes and she cleared her throat. It still hurt. Earth, Milky Way, Pegasus… It all hurt.

Gritting her teeth, Reese clamped down on her emotions and quickly got to her feet. Then she did the only thing that came to mind – she crisply saluted the grave, paying her respects to one of her old friends. Once that was done, she turned about and walked away, letting out a deep, troubled breath as she went.

Some of the others had already left for the Jumper, but Ramirez still stood by Sanders' grave. She didn't want to disturb him, so she moved to go past him, but he looked up and saw her.

"Headin' back?" Ramirez met her eyes head-on, his features carved in stone.

"Yeah…" Reese nodded, her burning eyes easing up as she regained control. She looked at the grave in front of him. Only a sole red flower lay in front of the cross carrying Sanders' dog tag. It looked fresh. Her curious eyes moved up to Ramirez, who avoided her look. "Um… You ready?"

Ramirez hesitated a bit. He glanced at the dog tag and then quickly crossed himself, mumbling something in Spanish. Reese didn't recognise the words, but the way he said them… She averted her eyes, feeling like an intruder.

"My Grandma taught me to respect the dead," Ramirez explained lowly, noticing her action. "You religious, Cap'n?"

"My parents were," said Reese uncomfortably. She shifted on her feet and glanced around the graveyard. They were the only ones left. Not that anyone would force them to leave if they weren’t ready, but it set her slightly on edge to suddenly be alone with the sergeant.

Ramirez seemed to pick up on her mood and didn't comment. Instead, he gave Sanders's grave a mixed look. "Y'know… He didn't have anyone back home."

Looking back, Reese followed his eyes to the grass-covered mound, her stomach clenching uneasily. "That's sad."

"Is it? He said it made it easier." Ramirez’s brows were furrowed. His voice sounded almost… _wistful_. Insides twisting, Reese figured she knew why.

"Who did you…?"

Ramirez's eyes hardened and he raised his chin grimly. "My baby brother. He was about Sanders' age."

Reese hesitated, unsure how to handle this new kind of openness from the Sergeant. In the end, though, she did the only thing instinct told her to. She stepped up to him and touched his shoulder lightly.

"I'm sorry."

Ramirez nodded in thanks, but kept his silent gaze trained on the grave. Reese removed her hand and sighed. She looked up at the blue sky, the sun burning her exposed neck. A warm breeze streaked by. Again, she mused on the contradictory association to this place.

"I'm gonna head back to the Jumper," she sighed eventually. "You want a minute?"

Ramirez shook his head and picked up his beret from his BDU pants pocket, putting it on his clean-shaven head. "Nah, I'm cool." He turned around and smirked at her. "Could use a drink, though."

Reese couldn't help but chuckle as they began to move back to the landing site. It felt good. It made it easier. "Fine. It's on me this time." 

* * *

"This brings back memories."

Sam raised her head tiredly from her silent vigil by the infirmary bed. Daniel stood in the open doorway leading into one of the rooms of the newly established long-term ward. A sad, resigned smile crossed his face.

Sam bit her lip and looked back at the Kadarian girl in the bed. Reika's features were ashen, her hair white and her skin making her look sixty years older than she was. She was hooked up to all sorts of life-support machines, as well as fluid IV containing both nutrients and medicines. Even if she bore the marks of her native galaxy's evil, Sam knew Daniel was alluding to someone else. Someone she'd been willing to die for.

"Yeah…" Swallowing the lump in her throat, Sam tightened her grip on Reika's small, cold hand.

Thinking about Cassie still hurt. Sam didn't know if the General had been able to take her somewhere safe. He hadn't mentioned anything in that last communication, nor in the files he'd sent her. But somehow she doubted it. It'd been so sudden and professional. No real time to react beyond the most immediate emergency procedures.

Behind her, Daniel moved slowly into the room and around the bed. He stared down at the unconscious girl, sighing deeply. Sam knew the sight of children affected him as much as it did her, if not more.

"Kinda makes you wish you could turn back time." He glanced up at her, smiling again. It was his shield against the pain. Sam snorted lightly.

"It's possible," she said, feeling control slipping back into her fingers once she began thinking of the scientific challenges. Tears came so easily to her these days – like the dam had finally broken in that supply room – and Sam needed to be strong again. "I could work out the next time there's gonna be a solar flare?"

Daniel scoffed and ran a hand through his hair. "Don't know if I want to get caught in a time loop or Ancient Egypt again."

"Technically, you can't even remember those times," Sam pointed out good-naturedly. "Though, we _did_ remember everything when we came back from 1969."

"1969? That's a story I ain't heard before."

Sam's head snapped up just as John stepped through the open doorway. He walked casually, dressed in his ordinary black BDUs. However, his shoulders looked tense, and his eyes seemed slightly cautious to meet hers as he halted at the bottom of Reika's bed.

She forced her neck to relax and gave John a small smile. "I doubt it was anything like your trip 28,000 years into the future, which _you_ haven't told anyone about as far as I know."

John smiled briefly, but it seemed strained. "It's the Temporal Prime Directive. Can't really spoil the future for ya."

Sam snorted. He _had_ already spoiled the future and most likely changed it by telling them where to find Teyla over a year ago. What struck her, however, was that she'd almost forgotten how well timed John's humour could be. It was refreshing to be part of it again.

Daniel cleared his throat, drawing the others' attention to him. He looked at his wristwatch and grimaced. "As fun as this is, I'm late for my check-up. I'll have to catch up with you guys later."

"Keller's not easing up on you yet?" asked John.

"Name a doctor who does." Daniel rolled his eyes as he stepped around the bed and past John. Sam followed him with her eyes. "At least I don't have to walk with a cane anymore."

With Daniel gone, Sam became keenly aware that she and John were now alone. Together. And that giant elephant was lurking quietly in the background, as it always did these days.

She turned her attention back to Reika. John didn't speak for a long time. Sam's neck tensed for every beat of the heartbeat monitor, until – finally – his voice broke through the monotony.

"How is she?"

Sam glanced at him a little uneasily and saw that his hands gripped the bed’s footboard. A hard look was on his face, but it wasn't directed at her anymore. John's dark eyes were fixed upon Reika's unmoving body.

Sam sighed, resuming her gaze at the little girl. "They've started her on a new stem cell treatment. Hopefully it'll be more successful than the last one."

"How long do they reckon 'till they see results?"

"They don't know.” Sam looked up at John's grim features. “Weeks, maybe months. It's a very experimental treatment. They'll have to keep her in a medical-induced coma, but Jennifer talked of stasis in a worst case scenario."

"Stasis, huh?" John shook his head, his jaw locked. "That'll kill her."

As she looked at Reika's ashen face, Sam agreed. She was already too weak. If she went into stasis, she'd never come back. Her body just couldn't handle it.

They both gazed at the young girl for a while before John's sigh broke the silence. "So… Been here long?"

Sam shrugged, staring at the small, pale hand in hers. She stroked it with her thumbs. "Couple of hours."

"So you haven't eaten." It wasn't a question. John eyed her below raised eyebrows.

"A few apples at breakfast," Sam admitted, something telling her where this was headed.

John released his grip on the footboard and pulled up an empty chair to the opposite side of the bed. He sat down and met her eyes. "I'll sit with her. You go on and get something to eat."

Sam opened her mouth to reply, but John put his feet up on the edge of the bed and his eyes returned to Reika. It struck her that she'd seen that particular stubborn look on his face many times before.

 XXX

" _You gonna stay cooped up in here all day?" Sam squinted at John in the dim light, and her hands stilled above the laptop keyboard. Her 2IC raised an eyebrow at her exasperatedly._

_She pointed at the laptop screen in explanation almost automatically. "I've got to finish this equation for Rodney…"_

" _Which you can probably do later," John crossed his arms sternly. "I'm betting you haven't had a bite to eat since this morning."_

_Sam smiled sheepishly. It was all the incentive John needed. He stepped forward and closed the laptop screen, oblivious to Sam's protest, "Hey!"_

" _Now," he said, leaning down on his palms on the desktop. "You go on and get something to eat. I'll make sure the place doesn't fall apart in the meantime."_

_It was a battle of wills, and John was winning. Sam sighed, conceding defeat. "You always gonna be this stubborn, Colonel?"_

_John shrugged offhandedly. "Probably."_

_Sam chuckled. Then she pushed her chair back and got to her feet._

 XXX

Drawn back to the beep of the heartbeat monitor, Sam smiled. John was ignoring her in familiar fashion, and his arms were crossed stubbornly.

"Alright. I could use some lunch," she said finally, then grimaced as she got to her feet. Her bones complained about being locked in the same position for the past hour or so. A walk would do her good as well.

Giving Reika a warm look, Sam squeezed her hand as a way of goodbye and turned to leave. She hesitated, however, and turned back to John, who raised an eyebrow at her questioningly. She smiled, "Thanks, John."

"Get out of here – I can practically _hear_ your stomach complain." John waved her off dismissively.

Sam left with a chuckle. It felt good.

* * *

"You're a lousy drinker, you know that, Cap'n?" Ramirez grinned from his perch on the balcony railing. Behind him, the afternoon sun was slowly sinking into the horizon. The ocean was calm, glittering red and yellow.

Reese blushed heavily and ducked her head into her arms. "I know… I'm never gonna live this one down, am I?"

"You don't try to do the chicken dance no matter how much you drink, Cap'n," Ramirez said wisely, taking a deep swallow of his beer.

Reese chuckled and slowly tipped her chin up, meeting her sergeant's amused eyes. She hesitated for a moment. "You don't have to call me that in private, Sergeant."

"Then you shouldn't call me Sergeant, _Cap'n_ ," retorted Ramirez and raised an eyebrow.

Reese rolled her eyes. "Ramirez," she enunciated pointedly.

"Matthews." Ramirez nodded evenly.

They both became silent, each staring at or taking swigs from their drinks. Reese looked up at the sunset, her floating mind taking her on a spin. "Y'know, Sanders would've freaked out if he knew we did this without him."

Ramirez snorted into his beer. "Now _there's_ a guy who'd do the chicken dance. We wouldn't even be able to stop him! He'd insist on doing the whole thing, then he'd pull you into it as well."

Reese grinned and stared up at him as Ramirez shook his head at happy memories. For once, he didn't look so angry. He almost looked…calm, relaxed. Like a weight had been lifted.

"Thompson would've tried to trick you into this hideous chicken costume as well," she shared, chuckling at the memory of a particular night back at the academy. The MP had been given quite a sight when they were called out to the pub. It gave a new meaning to the word 'chick fight'.

"Yeah?" Ramirez met her eyes.

She smiled. "Yeah." 

* * *

Sam put the last box on top of the others, then stepped back and looked at her watch. She sighed.

Fifteen minutes. It wasn't time just yet.

She looked around her quarters for anything else to occupy herself with, but didn't get any ideas. The things from her office were put into one corner, gathering dust in cardboard boxes since she didn't have anywhere to put them. Not that there was much of a point unpacking them. She'd get a place eventually, at least when the mining site was finished.

Sam let out a frustrated breath. In retrospect, she saw that the IOA carried more weight than she thought, and she'd underestimated the lengths they'd go to. Daniel told her someone put out rumours that _she'd_ knocked Coolidge around two weeks ago. She didn't know what frustrated her more – that she wished it was true, or that other people believed it.

Sam went over to her bed and sat down on the edge. Her eyes went to the bookshelf where her photos stood side-by-side on the middle shelf. She halted by the carved bird of bark standing at the centre of them all. She'd learned through the grapevine that John was in fact the one who’d knocked Coolidge around in the gateroom. The man himself neither confirmed nor denied it, and Sam didn't ask. It sounded like something he'd do. As for why… Sam looked at the picture of SG-1 standing next to the carved bird.

Something had changed. Despite the lingering tension, John's eyes weren't as hard and defiant anymore. Occasionally he even seemed…friendly. Sam didn't know what it meant, or at least she didn't dare think about it. She'd screwed up. She couldn't dare hope.

Her eyes went back to the carved bird. It'd been completely out of character. Not something she'd expected to come from John. His gifts tended to be funny stuff. The bird almost seemed…something far different. More poignant.

XXX

" _I know it's a little late, but…"_

_Sitting on the edge of her bed, still dressed in his BDU, John played with something in his hands before holding it out to her. He barely met her eyes._

_"What is it?" Sam sat up with a frown, the sheets pooling around her waist._

_John ran a hand through his hair and Sam noticed the awkwardness immediately. It put her a little on edge. Eventually, though, John met her eyes. "Happy birthday, Sam.”_

_Despite all that’d happened in the past week, Sam couldn't help a silly grin spread across her face. She turned the paper-wrapped package over in her hands. "I thought we said no presents."_

_John smirked, shrugging. "Everybody's gotta have a present for their birthday."_

" _Thank you." Sam smiled, turning to the package. She unwrapped it quickly and her eyes widened in surprise. She held the glass container in her hands and peered at the carved bird within. "Wow." She almost didn't find words. Had he made it himself? She looked at John, who yet again didn't quite meet her eyes. "It's beautiful, John."_

" _I hope you'll like it," John said awkwardly._

_Sam put the container down and crept over to him, only dressed in shorts and a tank top – her preferred PJs. She hugged him and kissed his cheek. "I love it. Thank you."_

_John seemed to finally relax a little, smiling at her. He brushed some stray hair out of her face and stroked her cheek softly. "You're welcome, Sam."_

XXX 

A lone tear ran down Sam's cheek. They came so easily to her these days. She brushed it away and stared at the carved bird again. It was one of the few items that had escaped her emotional breakdown when she wrecked her quarters. Kadara, Earth, the IOA, her alienation to John… It’d all been too much to handle in the end. She'd broken down. She'd even destroyed the Rubik's Cube. It was impossible to repair.

Sam sighed, blinking away fresh tears. She'd made so many stupid decisions, both in the heat of the moment and in the name of rationality and duty. How could she ever make them right?

Her watch suddenly chimed, startling her. Sam looked at it and turned off the alarm. 22:00. She heaved another sigh.

This was it. Time to face the past.  

Her eyes went back to the bookshelf and the row of pictures. They travelled from the carved bird to the portrait of a grey-haired man dressed for fishing. Memories flooded her senses. Some old, some recent. Seeing them again, Sam's jaw tightened and her eyes hardened.

_There’s only one way from the bottom, Carter: up._

The next moment, _Daedalus_ beamed her to a deserted, darkened corridor on the outskirts of the city. Regaining her senses, Sam saw Caldwell step out from the shadows. She straightened and squared her shoulders.

“Alright, Caldwell. Let’s talk.” 

* * *

  
**Next** : "Those were good times."

* * *


	14. DAY 140

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Look not mournfully into the past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the present. It is thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy future, without fear." - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers: Season 4 (Lifeline, Doppleganger, Reunion, Tabula Rasa, This Mortal Coil, Quarantine, Harmony, Trio). Also, I've borrowed some of the final scene in Lifeline between John and Sam, with a tiny rewrite... Thanks to the franchise and the writers for the borrow!

 

 

* * *

**THIRTEEN | "Those were good times."**

_Prompt: A time to laugh_

* * *

 

 

" _Perhaps I know best why it is man alone who laughs; he alone suffers so deeply that he had to invent laughter."_ ~Friedrich Nietzsche

* * *

**_Two and a half years earlier_ **

_Without intending to, John observed the woman out of the corner of his eye. Crumpled Midway jumpsuit, tousled hair, slight shadows under her eyes; it looked like she'd been working non-stop for days. Maybe some of Rodney's past slips about this woman were true after all._

_The reputation of Colonel Samantha Carter had followed him since his first day in the Stargate programme. Just mentioning her name was enough to inspire awe and respect from military and scientists alike. With all the nicks in her belt, however, he wondered why the hell she'd wound up on something like the Midway station._

_The last time he met Carter, she'd visited Atlantis during the Pegasus Project along with her team. That was a year ago. They hadn't stayed long, but it'd been enough to let him learn a few things about her: she was smart as hell and she didn't give up. She'd even taken out a Wraith ship to achieve their goal of protecting the Milky Way from an Ori invasion. That gave her a star in his book._

_As if she realised she was under scrutiny, Carter glanced and him and John cleared his throat. "So… You sticking around?"_

_A silent sigh replaced Carter's poorly hidden smile. "No. General Landry wants Doctor Lee and I to gate back, give him a full briefing on the situation here." She paused and peeked at him. "The_ Apollo _'s gonna remain in orbit for the time being, in case you need any assistance."_

_John could only nod. A strange feeling settled over him. Memories of the past few days fluttered in the dark haze of his mind. He glanced only briefly at Carter, his voice low. "Thanks for saving our asses back there from the bad guys. It was a risky move."_

_At that, Carter raised an eyebrow and she turned more fully towards him. "It was nothing compared to the risk you and your team took." Her voice took on a soft tone. "Frankly, I'm amazed that you were able to pull it off."_

_John grimaced and shifted on his feet. "We had a lot of help," he dismissed._

__"Yeah…"_ He didn't need to look into her eyes to see Carter's sympathy. Her voice said it all._

_She then straightened and John recognised a very familiar stance – the kind any military officer would use in this situation: When they had to tell loved ones that a friend or family member had died. It made him stiffen._

_"General Landry sends his condolences. He was deeply saddened to hear about Doctor Weir." Carter paused, then relaxed her stance and added in a softer tone, "We all were."_

_Oddly enough, John's words stopped in his throat and he only managed a curt nod. He couldn't meet Carter's eyes. Instead he focused his stare on the moons up ahead. They were cold and unresponsive._

_"We haven't given up hope," he managed finally. "If there's a chance she's still alive, I'll find her." He locked his jaw, and rested his fists at his sides. His spine straightened and he almost held his breath, waiting for the inevitable rebuff._

_He didn't get it. Instead, Carter stepped closer and touched his shoulder. "I know, John."_

_And she did. He could hear it in her voice, but he couldn't respond beyond another sharp nod. His chest constricted and he was forced to let out the breath he'd held. Carter's grip tightened on his shoulder joint, then she let go and stepped back. It'd been just enough._

_John heard the doors open and close, but he kept his eyes trained skyward. The cold, silvery moons glittered high up on the sky above the dark waters surrounding Atlantis._

_He blinked. Once, twice, until the small dots that caught his attention became visible. Stars. A lot of them. More than he could count._

_His eyes narrowed. She was somewhere out there. Maybe she'd get caught up in the coming battles between the Asurans and the Wraith. Maybe she was a prisoner. Maybe she was dead. No matter what, John would find her. He'd bring her home, one way or another._

* * *

_"I'm sorry, John." Sam's eyes were apologetic. Standing on the other side of the desk, John's insides dropped._

_"C'mon, Sam," he wheedled. He leaned down on his fists on the top of Sam's desk._

_She shook her head and gestured to the file in her hands. "I told you I'd look at your proposal and consider it, but this just isn't workable. There are too many unknown variables and too much that could go wrong. It's too risky."_

_"Only to a few, and we're all committed!" John bore his eyes into Sam's, willing her to_ see _, but she only sighed and put the file down._

_"I'm sorry, but I can't let you take that chance. You're too valuable to this city."_

_John's jaw tightened. "Didn't you say you and SG-1 used to get into impossible situations, but you got out?"_

_Sam's eyes narrowed. "Yeah, we did, and frankly I'm amazed we're still alive. But that's beside the point – "_

_"It's the same thing," John insisted, leaning closer above the desk._

_Their eyes met. John didn't blink until Sam exhaled and leaned forward in her chair, her palms up._

_"Look, John, I get it. I understand what it's like to want to bring back someone you care about – " John recognised the tone. He twisted on his heel, his hands clenched at his sides. Sam's voice rose in volume, "– but you can't rush into something like this! Especially not now."_

_Jaw locked, John stared down into the gate room. The stargate stood silent and inert. A few security guards stood languidly on one side, chatting amiably. Picture perfect of the situation on Atlantis these past few weeks during Sam's transition to command._

_Behind him he heard Sam get to her feet. She came to his side, fully faced towards him. Her voice was firm._

_"Right now we've got the Asurans right where we want them: fighting the Wraith. That means they're out there, hunting down hive ships and Wraith planets." Sam paused, eyeing him for any objection. He had none. "Even if they're programmed to do this, they wouldn't have left their own home planet open for any attack. They're replicators, John – whatever galaxy, they_ learn."

 _Like in the Milky Way, where they'd apparently gone from little bugs to full-grown human impersonations in less than a year. John recalled Sam's story from last week._ _He reluctantly eased his stance, but kept his eyes fixed on the stargate._

_"Besides – " Sam's voice suddenly lost the firm tone, " – we've got no way of knowing if Dr Weir is still on their planet. It could be a suicide run. Even if you're willing to try, John, I'm not willing to risk your lives based on speculation."_

_John's fists clenched. "What happened to – "_

_Sam held up a hand. "Give me something solid and I'll back you up. Until then, we've got other things that need our attention." She gestured into the air. "Like today's mission to M3X-387."_

_It made sense. Of course it did. Even in these few past weeks, John had realised that Sam could win an argument almost as easily as Elizabeth - if not better when it came to military matters. She just had that kind of experience; she commanded respect almost instinctually. Reluctantly, John turned back as Sam returned to lean on her desk. His arms were tightly crossed, though. It wasn't that easy to just push **her** to the back of his mind._

_"Do we_ have _to?"_

_Sam smirked. "According to McKay, yes. He thinks there might be something there to help us fight the Wraith and the Replicators."_

_"He_  always _ _thinks there might be something to help us fight the Wraith."_ John half-rolled his eyes._

 _"You can't say it's not a compelling argument."_ _Sam chuckled._

_John _pushed his fists deep into his BDU pants pockets_. "I guess not."_

* * *

**DAY 140**

John hitched up the P90 attached to his vest and held it comfortably in his arms as he stepped into the lower part of the gate room. The place bustled with activity; people in both SGC and Expedition uniforms moved back and forth, most of them carrying crates and containers to be stacked up along the walls.

In the middle of all this stood Sam, her voice loud and firm above the commotion. "Be careful with that!" she called out to two soldiers swaying a container marked 'Hazardous' between themselves. "That's liquid naquadah. It could blow up this entire tower."

The soldiers glanced nervously at each other, then stepped more carefully towards their destination. Sam, eyebrows creased in worry, followed them with her eyes until the container was safely stored along the wall.

John threw a nod towards his team to get ready and they moved off to the end of the platform. He ignored Ronon's raised eyebrows as he veered off and approached Sam. "The big moving day, huh?"

"Finally." Sam looked up from her tablet. A slight huff escaped her lips. She jotted something down, then glanced at him and eased into a smile. "It'll be good to get started on the construction of the mining site. I've heard enough complaining from McKay about our lack of materials to last me two lifetimes. At least."

John snorted. Ribbing Rodney never got old, no matter what happened. "Well, that's not something you need to worry about now. Leave it to the IOA. Maybe he'll talk a hole in 'em and sort this place out."

Sam's smile tensed and her eyes rose up to the glass office, now attached with a very conspicuous wooden door. Xiaoyi and Coolidge were inside, talking without sound. John glanced too and wondered if he should've left it unsaid. The change of command was still a sore issue. However, Sam straightened her shoulders and looked back at him with a refreshed smile.

"You're right. I've got other things to sort out." Off to the side, a crate hit the ground and people flustered around it immediately. Sam sighed. "Like taking care of this moving thing… I'll be happy once we're off-world."

Given the status quo on Atlantis, John could see where she came from. He winced. "Yeah… Make that two of us." Sam raised an eyebrow and John explained, "We're visiting the Athosians today."

Sam's mouth formed into an O. "Right. When will you be back?"

"We've got eight hours on the clock according to the guys upstairs." John nodded towards the upper floor and then gave Sam a second look. "Why? You need some extra hands?"

"Wouldn't hurt, but I'm sure we'll manage." Sam smiled briefly. "Thanks anyway."

Although his neck was slightly tense, John shrugged. "Just holler if you change your mind."

Right then, a door slammed shut heavily above them and they looked up in time to see James Coolidge storm from the glass office. He shuffled people aside in the grand staircase and most likely would've continued to the transporter if his eyes hadn't caught sight of them, or rather Sam. He halted and, for a moment, his features darkened and glinted.

Something coiled in John's stomach. Hatred rose up like bile. Before he realised he'd done it, John pulled himself up to his full height and stepped into Coolidge's line of sight. Blinking, Coolidge's eyes went wide and he quickly veered off towards the transporter, leaving a trail of disgruntled people behind him.

Purposefully ignoring Sam's pointed stare beside him, John peered across his shoulder at the upper floor. Back up in the office, Xiaoyi stood by the desk, her face down. She seemed to take a few breaths and then straightened up. It didn't take her long to gaze down into the gate room and see their eyes on her. Her jaw set and she walked with deliberate, slow steps to the chair behind the desk. She picked up a radio and a second later Sam touched her earpiece in response.

"I'll be there in a minute," she replied to Xiaoyi's unheard message. Sam logged off and met John's eyes, her commander's mask slipping into place. His grip had tightened around the P90 and he forced himself to ease up.

"Trouble in paradise." It was half a statement, half a question. He didn't like it. In-fighting between two leaders never boded well. Especially these two.

"Another meeting," Sam explained, her voice annoyed. "Looks like the moving will be a little behind the schedule."

"I'm sure they can start without you," John suggested.

Sam hesitated and skirted her eyes around them. "Probably, but I'd like to keep a handle on things just in case. Besides, it's my mission. I've got to meet up with the Tikwee colony's leader before we can start up constructions, so I'd better be there when we go through the first time."

John's neck tensed somewhat; Sam was being slightly cryptic. Most people wouldn't recognise it, but after two years as her 2IC, John did. She worried about this new "command" of hers. Why, John didn't know. The IOA had practically banished her there – why would they do anything to change that? Or did she think that she would screw things up?

"Anyway, I better get going," said Sam. "Say hello to Teyla for me?"

"Sure. Good luck," John added, tilting his head towards the glass office.

Sam smiled tightly. "See you when you get back."

John nodded and took a step back towards his team, while Sam handed off her tablet to one of the gate technicians with instructions to log and double-check that they'd gotten the correct containers.

As he retraced his steps towards his team, John followed Sam's ascent in the corner of his eye. People almost went out of their way to let her through, which made him stop short and frown. Some stared after her with silent, narrowed eyes, but Sam didn't seem to notice. Her back was straight and her steps firm…at least until someone bumped into her. Her mask wavered and for a brief second…John's foot edged forward. However, before he could do anything, Sam had already continued up the grand staircase as if nothing had happened.

Shrugging off an uneasy feeling, John turned to his team. Only Ronon seemed to have noticed anything out of the ordinary. The Satedan raised his eyebrows at him, his features slightly dark, but John ignored it. This wasn't an issue he wanted broadcasted. Besides, Sam was a big girl. She could handle it. He was just her subordinate now.

_That's what you told yourself before and you remember what happened?_

He'd rather not. Not now. He had his mission to think about.

"Let's move out," John told the team and turned on his radio. "Chuck, you mind dialling up?" The faster they could get underway, the better.

_"I'm inputting the coordinates now, sir."_

* * *

 

 

  
_Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on._ ~Bob Newhart

* * *

_"Someone ordered a pizza?"_

_Sweeping stray hairs out of her face, Sam looked up as John stepped through the open balcony doors, two trays in hand. She turned and leaned against the railing with a frown. "We got pizza?"_

__"Well... not exactly, but you could always pretend."_  
_

_Sam smiled and accepted the tray. "Thanks, John."_

_John shrugged and went to sit against the wall, his long legs stretched out on the balcony's concrete floor. The tray rested upon his thighs._ _Sam followed his example and plopped down beside him with a deep sigh. She stared up at the twin moons. They shone silver and cold. Still, Sam didn't feel cold anymore._

_"Eat," John said with his mouth and hands full of his ham sandwich._

_Sam rolled her eyes at the non-veiled command. Although it'd only been a few months, she'd quickly realised John Sheppard didn't mind turning the tables when it was just the two of them, no matter if it bordered on insubordination. But she'd taken orders for so long that sometimes it was nice to be someone else and not the top dog. She picked up her chicken sandwich and bit into it._

_They sat like that for a long while, just eating the sandwiches and staring up at the evening sky. John had even brought the Pegasus equivalent of hot coffee, so Sam didn't notice the cold stone floor underneath her until she'd finished it all. Even then, Sam didn't want to get up. Not yet. She just stared up at the vast, black sky._

_"I was drifting in space," she said finally. John didn't reply. "We'd tried to stop the Ori invasion at one of the supergates. I was out in an E.V.A. suit switching the supergate's control crystals so we could dial out before the Ori dialled in. I wasn't fast enough."_

_Next to her, John sat quietly and stared at the same sky as her. Sam blew out a breath. "Four ships got through before we could stop them. We fought, but they destroyed almost all our ships. I couldn't do anything. I just…drifted."_

_For a long while, none of them said anything. Sam's chest constricted uneasily at the well of memories, but she kept it back. In the corner of her eye, John was an immovable rock. He didn't move, didn't speak, and it made her smile despite it all._

_"The entity made me live through it all over again," Sam continued. "Every time I thought I was being rescued by the_ Odyssey _, they were destroyed by a remaining Ori ship. I could just stare… until_ you _spoke."_

_At that, John shifted a little. Sam took a deep breath and plunged on, "I opened my eyes and I was in Atlantis' cell. You were there, dressed like an Asuran. You wanted me to reveal the location of Earth. I resisted, so you…put your hand in my head. That's…when you guys found me."_

_Again, silence. Sam didn't know what else to say. She just fixed her eyes in the twin moons. The experience with the alien entity was still fresh. Not something she'd be able to sweep under the table anytime soon, even if she knew she had to. She was in a different galaxy, and she was at the top of the food chain. A lot of people depended on her to do her job. It was a lonesome task. At least most of the time, Sam's mind added and she glanced at John._

_"So… are we talking jumpsuit here or that weird…frock-thingy?"_

_A chuckle escaped Sam's lips before she could help herself. It was an entirely absurd thing to say… and just the kind of thing she'd learned to expect from John._

_"Actually, I think you were all silver." Sam smirked, to which John grimaced._

_"Great, now_ I'm _gonna have those stupid nightmares."_

_Sam chuckled and they fell into a companionable silence. She peered sideways at her 2IC, who still kept his eyes up and ahead, and couldn't help but wonder at the mystery that was John Sheppard._

_He'd been on the shortlist to command this city, but turned it down. He claimed it was about the politics and red tape, but Sam couldn't help but wonder if it'd been something else. When she'd watched him on a day-to-day basis, she'd seen the camaraderie he shared with the people in this city, from newly arrived gate technicians to his own team. John Sheppard thrived in his position. He seemed to breathe for his job, for this city and its inhabitants, and, as his proposal to retrieve Dr Weir several days ago showed, he was ready to sacrifice himself for the sake of someone else._

_She'd been that way once too. She still was to some degree, but things had changed. She was a leader now; she couldn't afford that kind of thinking._

_Sam glanced at John again, who'd put aside the tray and pulled his knees up. His elbows rested on his knees; he fiddled with a golf ball. In that instant, he reminded her of General O'Neill, and of Cam, and she finally thought she knew._

_Even if John had taken the job, he'd be too restless. He wouldn't have been happy commanding Atlantis and sending other people off-world in his stead. And then there were the social interactions, which he'd miss out on a lot more. He'd be caught up in the politics and red tape as he said, but also meetings, administrative tasks and all the other things that occupied Sam's days._

_Maybe that's why he took pity on his lonesome superior officer tonight, Sam's mind reasoned lightly. Not that she'd complain. It was a nice feeling, sitting on the balcony as they did and doing almost nothing but stare at the sky. The nightmare of drifting in space and watching her friends die now seemed but a memory._

_Still… Sam mused as John continued to fiddle with the golf ball. John was a great leader in his own rights. He might be comfortable with his 2IC position, but one day…he might have to step up to the trust and respect everyone in this city has for him. He just had to shape up a little more. Like the Asgard would've said: he had great potential._

* * *

"With all due respect, Ms Xiaoyi, this mission's been postponed long enough." Sam fought against fisting her hands, but she was failing. She crossed her arms instead, latching on to opposite elbows in a tight grip. "If we want Atlantis and  _Daedalus_  properly repaired, we need to get started on the mining. I'm  _sure_  Dr McKay has properly informed you of our needs for new materials."

"He has," Xiaoyi said, composed despite the display Sam had seen earlier after Coolidge's exit. She leaned back in the comfortable office chair. Sam's lips thinned. "However, this request doesn't come from me. Colonel Caldwell called in a while ago. He said  _Daedalus_  has picked up some new information about the Wraith, and that part of it concerns the Tikwee. I'd say that's cause enough to postpone the mission a day or two, wouldn't you?" Xiaoyi raised an eyebrow.

Sam couldn't argue with that. A surge of worry replaced her previous annoyance. The Wraith had attacked a few planets after Kadara, then dropped out of sight once more for reasons unknown. Maybe they were just toying with them, or maybe they were caught up in the delicate balance of power internally in the Wraith society; they just didn't know. Their direct link to the Wraith via Todd was gone with the introduction of the superhive, so all they had to go on were rumours and the odd sightings.

"When will they get here?" Sam eyed Xiaoyi carefully. The IOA didn't like involving themselves with the Wraith, but Caldwell's message had suggested their new mining operation might be compromised. Even Xiaoyi couldn't ignore that.

"About two hours," Xiaoyi said. She nodded towards the window overlooking the stargate. "You may leave the containers down in the gate room for now. Hopefully Colonel Caldwell's news will not halt the mining operation permanently. Thanks to the numerous reports and meetings with the science department, I am  _fully_ aware of this city's needs."

The edged tone to Xiaoyi's voice almost made Sam crack a smile. She relaxed her arms and prepared to leave, but Xiaoyi held her back.

"Colonel, before you leave…" She paused and picked up a file on the desktop, peering at it before meeting Sam's eyes. Recognizing the file, Sam's neck tensed. "About this list of people you wish to bring off-world… I was surprised to see that you want to bring fourteen engineers, but… only eight scientists?"

"It's mining," Sam said. "I'm going to need engineers with experience more than I need theoretical scientists."

"And you chose only the engineers from Stargate Command?"

"They've got experience mining naquadah and trinium in the Milky Way. If you need references, ask Major Lorne. He used to be the executive officer under Colonel Edwards on that team. As for the scientists, most of them have a background in practical engineering. Dr Ludlow even worked on designing new drills before we lost contact with Earth."

"I see," Xiaoyi said, and returned her stare to the list. She pointed at something and commented, "Sixteen combat soldiers?"

"With the losses we've sustained so far, I'm not taking any chances." Sam's voice was firm. "I think we both can agree that we'd rather not lose more people."

Xiaoyi raised an eyebrow. "Indeed." She looked at the list again, then put it down and picked up another. "I realize the need for practical mindsets, Colonel, but I would nevertheless want you to consider these people as well." She handed Sam the list in her hand. "Some of them have asked to be put off-world for a while, to get some change of pace, and I'm inclined to let them. Tirana, Administrator Wutt told me, is an ideal place for research. However, it's up to you."

Sam looked down on the list of names. All were civilians: scientists and doctors with mostly theoretical backgrounds in botany, geology, engineering and social sciences. Several faces came to Sam's mind as she scrolled down the list of twenty-something names. Some of them she knew, others were unknown – new additions to the SGC during the last year, Sam presumed. She bit her lip. Having an office at the SGC would've ensured that Xiaoyi probably knew many of these people. More than Sam would.

"I'll consider it." She forced herself to return Xiaoyi's indiscernible gaze.

Xiaoyi smiled and sank back in her chair. "Thank you, Colonel."

Sam only nodded. She hated politics.

* * *

 

 

  
_Laughter is the shortest distance between two people. ~_ Victor Borge

* * *

_"I can't believe you still got the photo in your pocket." Sam's smile was infectious. Seated opposite of her in the nearly deserted mess hall, John smirked and twiddled the Polaroid between his fingers._

_"You never know when you gotta show an amnesic who's his CO around here."_

_"And apparently, a photo is the best way to do it," Sam rolled her eyes and then looked down at the steaming hot coffee in her hands. "Maybe I should get one as well? I can think of a few uses for it." She gave him a pointed look._

_"You're not gonna need it. Everyone knows who's the boss around here," John said and put the photo back in his pocket. Sam smirked at him and sipped her coffee. John raised an eyebrow. "Y'know, that's probably not gonna help."_

_"It's what I do when I can't sleep," Sam shrugged, referring to the topic that had led them both to the mess hall at night. "That and fixing motorcycles or naquadah generators." John's eyebrow rose further and Sam noticed. "What?"_

_"Nothing. Just…" He drifted off, unsure how to phrase his reply. Most because he was impressed; he'd never pictured Sam as a grease monkey. Her reputation made her seem more like...well, Sigourney Weaver in_ Alien _, although he'd **never** be brave enough to admit that. Not unless he'd drunk himself to courage._

_"God, please don't tell me I reminded you of McKay."_

_John chuckled. "No. Well, a little," he amended, feeling brave, "but that's because you're both kinda geeky."_

_Sam groaned and hid her face behind her coffee cup. A moment of embarrassment passed before she looked up with an amused chide, "I'm gonna allow that because it's partly true, but I can still get that Polaroid taken any day, Colonel_.  _Just so you know."_

_Despite the half-hearted threat, John only smirked and nodded at her cup. "Refill?"_

* * *

John relished the fresh air as they hiked through the sparse forest. It was a welcome change from the processed air inside Atlantis, as were their surroundings. The straight, scattered trees reached high into the sky, probably two stories. Rays of sun streamed down from the treetops, warming his skin and black BDUs. John didn't mind.

"This is nice," he said out loud.

At his side, Teyla smiled. "I imagine you do not get out much anymore."

"You could say that," John grimaced.

"So how are things on Atlantis?" Teyla stepped gracefully over a protruding root ahead of him. John moved more mechanically, securing the swaying P90 on his vest as he continued on.

"Fine," he said shortly, but Teyla tilted her head in familiar fashion and John knew there was no point sugar-coating the truth. "You probably heard there's been some changes since you last visited?"

Teyla nodded. "Yes, Dr Jackson told me when he last visited. You have a new leader now, the IOA?"

John reined in a huff, but his tone was dark. "Yeah. You remember those?"

Teyla raised an eyebrow and looked at him sideways. "It is difficult to forget someone who did not wish you were in the same room as them."

Reminded of the forced relocation of the Pegasus refugees several months ago, John couldn't help but make a face. "Sorry."

Teyla only shook her head. "You do not have to apologize, John. We have made our peace on this new planet Colonel Carter found for us. The past is the past."

Uncomfortable with the easiness of Teyla's forgiveness, John averted his eyes and focused on the animal tracks they seemed to follow. There was no obvious path to the Athosian settlement, but that was their intention. The Athosians were great hunters and trackers, and their weapon against the Wraith had always been evasion. According to Sam, their settlement was hidden deep inside this forest, close to a network of caves that'd provide hiding places in case the Wraith darts swooped in. John had faith in the Athosians' tenacity, but he still worried.

After Kadara, the Wraith had gone underground again. They hadn't come around to attack Atlantis, which either meant no one on Kadara had revealed their position, or the Wraith were toying with them. John wanted to believe the first. The Kadarians had reminded him of the Athosians; they wouldn't have given them up under pressure, not like the Bhaati. However, there was no way to be sure. The Kadarians' GDO had been destroyed, but that didn't mean the Wraith hadn't seen the symbols on the DHD. Besides, John was certain that the Wraith, and especially Todd, would've liked the idea of messing with their heads.

"John, is something wrong?" Teyla's voice drew him out of his dark meanderings. She eyed him with concern. Off to their flanks, Airman Michaels and Sergeant Rowan glanced at him, then quickly returned their eyes to their surroundings. Ronon was up ahead as usual, along with one of the teen Athosians, a boy named Wex.

"No, I'm fine," said John brusquely. The skin across his knuckles strained white, and he forced himself to relax. "Everything's fine."

Teyla looked as if she wanted to prod, but instead returned her gaze to the forest. "We need to take a turn here." She pointed to a denser grove of trees.

John and the rest of his team followed her lead. Trudging one step behind, John struggled to relax his tense shoulders. To get his mind on something else, he said, "Keller mentioned I was supposed to bring something back with me?"

Teyla slowed her steps so that they walked side-by-side again. "Yes. She asked me if we could gather some medicinal herbs indigenous to this planet. I promised I would send what we had the next time someone visited us."

"Medicinal herbs?" John asked. "Nothing psychedelic or anything?"

Teyla raised an eyebrow. "I do not know this word."

"Uh, you see any hallucinations or pink elephants?" John tried, and Teyla chuckled.

"Ah. No, there are some herbs that have pain-relieving abilities, but most of them are for common illnesses, like the one that made you all lose your memories."

John grimaced at the memory. He still had that Polaroid picture of himself somewhere, just in case he needed it again. "Not that I remember much, but I get it."

They entered the denser part of the forest, and the sunlight became sparse. It was not like the forest surrounding the Bhaati settlement, however, so John didn't get the urge to pull out his P90 in readiness.

He took off his aviator sunglasses and tucked them into a pocket on his vest. He squinted into the darkness until the details became clearer. "Sam says hi, by the way."

Teyla glanced at him. "How is she? Dr Jackson told me she's moving to another planet for a while?"

Reminded of this morning, John winced. "Yeah… We're setting up a mining operation on one of the Tikwee's colony planets, one called Tirana. Sam's been put in charge of the whole thing. They're starting up construction today."

"It must be difficult to leave the city after so many years," Teyla said, her tone careful but sympathetic. "It took me some time to get used to the sounds of nature again, as well as not seeing you – " She nodded towards Ronon and John alike to illustrate her old team, " – every day."

"Bantos practice isn't the same without getting my ass whipped," John agreed and Teyla chuckled.

"You are welcome to join our session later. I am teaching Wex." She gestured to the young eager teen at Ronon's heels. "He is an avid learner."

John made a face, his tone light. "Is he gonna whop my ass too?"

Teyla smiled and teased, "I will protect you."

"Great, that makes me feel  _loads_  better."

They continued through the forest for a while longer, and soon the trees scattered and gave way to more sunlight. John heard the sound of a roaring river, but couldn't see it until they exited the forest unto a cliff. Far below them, the river crashed against the stony walls. On the other side, another forest spread out beneath a ridge of towering, snow-capped mountains.

An Athosian-style rope bridge stretched from one cliff to another, and Wex led Ronon ahead. While they waited their turn as Airman Michaels and Sergeant Rowan clambered across, Teyla turned to John.

"John, may I ask you a question?"

"Sure." John nodded, but as Teyla's eyes became rather hesitant he tensed.

"Do your people think Colonel Carter was a bad leader?"

John shifted on his feet, not quite meeting Teyla's eyes. "Some of them, I think," he said evenly. "A few don't like the way the IOA got control."

"And you?" Teyla asked carefully.

John didn't reply. His jaw tightened and he half turned away. He hated the way the IOA had simply thrown Sam off-world like she was a bug under their shoe. He also hated that Sam hadn't fought against them. Leaders didn't give up. Although she'd shown him something he couldn't talk about, something she obviously wanted to make, he didn't see how she could without access to Atlantis' labs and resources.

Still, maybe the point was that she was trying.

Realising Teyla was still waiting for an answer, John said, "There's only a few civilians I've really liked... and there's also just a few officers I've ever respected."

He hoped she wouldn't ask him anything further, but Teyla seemed to have gotten her answer.

She smiled a little and turned to the rope bridge. The others had gotten across and were just waiting for them.

"You may go first, John. The village is not far once we're across."

* * *

 

_At the height of laughter, the universe is flung into a kaleidoscope of new possibilities._ ~Jean Houston

* * *

_"You made the right choice, John." Sam looked at him sideways. How did she always know where to find him? Seconds after exiting the stargate from Earth and there she was. She hadn't even changed out of her dress blues yet._

_John scoffed. "So it's a good thing to know the Replicators outnumber us ten to one? Fifty to one if all we've got is the_ Daedalus _."_

_"We've faced worse odds," Sam said, her tone light. Somehow, it annoyed him._

_"Yeah? And what's it gonna cost us_ this  _time?" John retorted, his arms crossed._

_Sam didn't immediately reply and he could feel her eyes on him. His jaw tightened. Nails dug into his palms. The dull pain was welcome._

_At his side, Sam sighed. "Of all the things I've been through, cleaning out Daniel's apartment after he died was the hardest thing I've ever done. Every time," she added, nearly amused._

_John shifted on his feet, his neck tense. The silver moons shone coldly down at him. A sharp breeze drifted past the balcony, but John didn't acknowledge it. He waited for the other shoe to drop, the shared sob story from a superior officer that'd somehow make him feel -_

_"Tell me about her." Sam's voice was soft._

_A strange feeling settled over John. The breeze passed on and left them behind. Warmth spread out from the city walls. He hadn't expected that: the empathic tone, the feeling that she really **knew**._

_He leaned forward to clutch the cool railing. Something built up in his chest. He pressed his lips together, but they moved almost on their own. Sound came out. Quiet, hushed. For some reason, he couldn't keep it in._

_"I thought she was crazy when she made me the military commander of Atlantis." From the dark haze, Elizabeth's smiling face looked at him across her desk. He chuckled and shook his head. "I still think she was."_

_Was, not is. John sobered. His knuckles whitened around the railing. "It wasn't fair. I should've—"_

_He couldn't finish the thought._ _At his side, Sam moved only marginally closer. He could feel her presence beside him, but he couldn't meet her eyes. Still, he raised his chin up at the two silver moons and his grip on the railing loosened._

_"She had a great sense of justice," John said. The dark haze fluttered once more with her face, only this time there was no smile. Her eyes and features told him to run, to leave her behind. He swallowed, his voice strained. "And courage."_

_John almost startled at the soft touch on his shoulder. Sam didn't say anything, but she didn't need to. It was there, in her eyes._

_He wasn't alone._

* * *

Sam glanced uneasily at Coolidge, who sat seething and silent by Xiaoyi's side. His eyes bore into her skin as she tilted her head at Caldwell. The  _Daedalus_  commander leaned forward on the table, unfazed by the three IOA members on the opposite side.

"During the last couple of days, we've picked up a lot of Wraith activity in the neighbouring solar systems to the Tikwee colony," Caldwell said. "It seems several Hive ships have gathered close to a planet we've designated M6X-7R2. For what purposes, we don't know, but we haven't registered any ZPM signature, so the superhive most likely isn't involved."

"Do you think it could be one of the other Wraith factions?" asked Sam, consciously ignoring Coolidge's stare.

Caldwell shrugged. "Possibly. We've heard some rumours that there might be some internal struggles among the Wraith due to the superhive. It could be they're planning some sort of attack to gain power."

"That would be to our advantage, wouldn't it?" asked Woolsey, seated on Xiaoyi's other side. "If the Wraith are busy fighting each other, then they won't be interested in us."

"But if it's the wrong faction that's been gathering on M6X-7R2, it could be that they've learned of our relationship with the Tikwee and are now targeting them," Sam pointed out, not too happy with the news Caldwell had brought. "We just have no way of knowing for sure."

"Unless we try a covert operation, no." Caldwell met Sam's eyes, and his subtext - directed only at her - was clear as rain. Her insides twisted.

"No." Xiaoyi's reply was curt. The two colonels looked sideways at Atlantis' new commander.

Sam raised her chin defiantly and clasped her hands on top of the conference table. "What do you suggest then?"

"Nuke them," Coolidge interjected, his eyes narrowed. "Swoop in and blast them all to hell."

Xiaoyi glanced at her colleague and Woolsey looked decidedly uncomfortable. He almost seemed to shift a little further away from Coolidge.

"We will do nothing of the sort, James," Xiaoyi told him. " _Daedalus_  is our only ship and is, as I understand it, working at less than 80 % efficiency due to the last Wraith attack we were involved in."

Sam frowned at the American representative to the IOA, who'd set his eyes on Xiaoyi now. John's words from earlier that day came to mind.  _Was_ there trouble in paradise?

"Then I'd suggest upgrading our security on the Tikwee colony planet," Caldwell said and all eyes returned to him. Coolidge sank back in his chair; his eyes returned slowly to the wall next to Sam.

Sam shrugged off an uneasy feeling and addressed Xiaoyi and Woolsey. "I agree. Even if the Wraith on M6X-7R2 aren't gonna attack the colony, we know from past events that the Wraith have a way of getting information on our activities. Sooner or later, they might figure out that we've got a mining site on Tirana and decide to attack. I think everyone in this room can agree that we  _can't_  lose those mines."

Xiaoyi eyed her for a moment. "What would you require to amply defend the mining site and the Tikwee colony?"

Sam resisted the urge to glance at Caldwell in victory as her mind worked quickly. "Tirana is close enough for Atlantis to monitor it on long-range sensors, so we're able to get a head warning in case of a planetary attack. However, we're not prepared for an incursion through the stargate." She paused and met Xiaoyi's eyes. "I'd suggest two security teams on 12-hour rotation by the gate; an additional permanent team for the Tikwee colony and one for the mining site; and a Jumper."

Xiaoyi's face didn't lose its stony quality at the swiftness of Sam's reply. She simply turned to Caldwell. "Could you spare as much from Atlantis' military resources?"

"Shouldn't be a problem," Caldwell said, "but we should think of installing a railgun or two in case of aerial attacks. I believe there are a few of those left in the city?"

"Dr Weir had them stored in one of the lower levels a few years back," Sam nodded. "A bit dusty, maybe, but they should work."

Xiaoyi didn't reply. Instead, she glanced at both her colleagues and then at her folded hands. Silence filled the conference room. Sam raised her chin as Coolidge's eyes turned on her again. Woolsey looked uncertainly at Xiaoyi and feeling so close to her goal, Sam felt she had to say something to tip the scales.

"I've also considered the list you gave me, Ms Xiaoyi." Slowly, Xiaoyi looked up at her. "If we expand the site a little, I don't see a problem if some of them still wish to join us. I'm sure there'll be something there to keep them busy besides mining. Besides, with the additional security they'd be well protected."

"I see." Xiaoyi raised an eyebrow. She glanced again at Woolsey and Coolidge before leaning forward in her seat. "Very well, I will consent to this on one condition: the IOA will review the final list of participants before any construction begins, and I want daily updates from both the mining site and  _Daedalus_. I do not want to be caught off-guard again."

Sam's lips thinned a little. There was no other way around it. She'd just have to make sure all those connected to the military could be trusted. "Agreed."

* * *

 

 

  
_The most wasted of all days is one without laughter._ ~e.e. cummings

* * *

_"Radek did really good today," Sam said as she leaned back in one of the comfy armchairs in her office. From the matching chair, John frowned as he prepared the chessboard._

_"Wonder what he'd do if he got stuck in the vents?"_

_Sam chuckled. She knew John felt differently: he cared about the people around here and he knew them pretty well. "I'm sure he'd come up with something." She stretched her arms – her joints cracking – and sighed. "I'm just happy we finally got out of this mess."_

_John raised an eyebrow and smirked. "You mean you didn't plan to get locked up in a transporter with Zelenka all day?"_

_Sam smiled and glanced at the open laptop on her desk. A stack of papers and folders lay next to it. She was supposed to prepare for her upcoming six-month review today - and tonight. "Not quite," she said. "But at least it got me out of the office for a while."_

_Their eyes met and amusement shone in both pairs. John didn't reply, but he didn't need to. It was one of the things about him that amazed her. She felt comfortable with him, even if she shouldn't._

_Breaking eye contact, Sam nodded towards the chessboard, "You black or white?"_

_"Ladies and full-bird colonels first," John replied, his tone bordering on cheeky. He lined up the white pieces on her side of the chessboard. Sam couldn't help but shake her head lightly._

_"I'm not gonna go easy on you, Colonel," she ribbed._

_John shrugged. "No holds barred. Ma'am," he added and his eyes twinkled._

_He finished the line-up on his side and then leaned back comfortably in the white armchair. He let his eyes drift around the office as Sam surveyed the chessboard. It took her a few moments to make her first move._

_Without a word, John turned back to the chessboard and looked at it. Sam observed him silently: the relaxed shoulders, the almost indifferent expression on his face, and the keen shine in his eyes. As John idly moved his pawn two steps forward to meet Sam's lone piece, she hid a smirk._

_It would be an interesting game._

* * *

"…And  _that's_ how you do 'The Swindle of a Century'," John finished.

On his thigh, Torren babbled nonsensically in reply, his mouth caught on the ear of a teddy bear Keller had given him for his birthday.

John snorted and hoisted the kid further up his lap. "Tell you what, I'll teach ya. Y'know, when you get older."

Torren simply crooned at him. John smirked.

_Kids._

The quaint Athosian village lay shaded within the forest. Although the day had barely passed noon, shadows already stretched from the tree trunks. The sun was partly hidden behind the tall snow-capped mountain John had seen earlier, but communal fires and torches shed light onto the tents making up the village.

As villages went, it was not one of the most remarkable. The tents were patched and dirty. Some had wooden foundations, compliments of the Atlantis engineers. Still, none of the faces around him reflected lives of hardship and fear. The Athosians had been hunted and hustled from place to place since he'd come to this galaxy, and yet they still laughed.

Jeers rose up as Teyla met Wex's eager enthusiasm with a lesson in patience. John turned to see the young teen on the ground, bantos rods at his sides. Ronon stepped out of the surrounding half-circle and pulled him to his feet, a grin on his face. Everyone else chattered amongst themselves and seemed to approve of Teyla's move.

"Wex," Teyla spoke, her voice clear in the sudden silence. "You must not rush. Focus on your balance. Let the rods be a part of yourself." She placed herself opposite the young teen. "Try again."

The teen positioned himself and John watched as he slipped into a familiar balanced position, the rods relaxed in his hands. Many years ago, John had been in his shoes. He smirked as Wex and Teyla began to circle, knowing how it would end.

Moments later, the teen was on the ground again, but this time Teyla helped him up. She smiled. "Good. Don't forget your footing. Be aware of your surroundings."

"I will try again," Wex said, panting slightly. He straightened his spine and Teyla touched his shoulder in approval. The crowd around them cheered and made room for them again.

As Teyla went into her position, John's smile slipped. Her stature was strong, balanced and relaxed. For a second, she reminded him of Sam. Or the Sam she used to be.

The memory of this morning returned to John. An uneasy feeling settled in his stomach.

He'd told Teyla there were only a few civilians and superior officers he'd ever respected. At one point, he'd trusted Sam nearly implicitly. Far more than he'd ever trusted a commanding officer, and she'd shown an undeserved trust in him. They'd broken the rules together – not an easy decision – but that's what Sam did. She made the tough decisions, and she let him have a say in the matter. Most of all, she hadn't been afraid to challenge the IOA, the Joint Chiefs, or even General O'Neill on behalf of Pegasus and Atlantis.

He thought she'd lost that ability and fighting spirit. After Earth happened…she shut him out. She burnt the midnight oil each night, made decisions on her own and then started to turn to the IOA. Only when she broke down did he learn some of the truth. Sam  _had_  made the tough decisions. She'd tried to protect the city and Pegasus both, but she'd been a victim of something he'd feared: politics. And now she'd paid the price. Although there was a more bureaucratic word for it, the term that popped up in John's mind seemed more fitting: exile.

John's hands clenched in frustration and Torren protested loudly. He startled and found he'd squeezed the boy a little in his arms.

"Sorry, kid," John mumbled. Torren quieted and looked up at him, then pointed at the teddy bear he'd dropped. John scooped it up from the ground and Torren blathered happily at its return. "Didn't mean to scare you," John said, but Torren seemed to have forgotten it already. He chewed on the teddy bear, completely in his own world.

Still apprehensive about the boy's reaction, John forced his arms to loosen without Torren falling off his lap. He glanced back at the bantos match between Teyla and Wex.

"Looks like your mom's winning. Not surprising," John added, a slight smirk on his lips. "You won't kick my ass when you're all grown up, will you?" Torren didn't reply. John sighed. "Who am I kidding? Of course you will."

He stared back at the match where Wex was once more on the ground. To his credit, though, he still got up on his feet and asked for another try.

Like Sam had done by showing him her blueprints.

John's eyes widened. The thought had just suddenly popped into his mind, like it'd been there all along. For a moment, that befuddling haze of frustration and confusion he so often felt cleared up.

Leaders shouldn't give up, and that's what he'd thought Sam had done ever since she started to listen to the IOA. But even after everything they'd done - the forced relocation, the pro-isolation politics, the forced change in command - she'd tried to keep her chin up and face their leadership as anyone true to their duty would. Like a professional. A professional put in the middle extreme circumstances that no one could've been able to predict.

And when she'd been at her lowest, when he'd helped her out by finding her SG-1 picture, she'd finally shown him her blueprints with strict instructions to delete after reading. She'd opened up and included him. She'd trusted him.

But most of all, she'd reminded him of something. Something important.

 _He_ still mattered.

* * *

"You're still here?" Daniel stepped up to her on the balcony, hands in his pockets. He breathed in the fresh salty air.

Sam leaned her elbows on the railing and glanced up at him. "Still here. We got some intel that suggested one of the Wraith factions might know about Tirana. I've postponed the move until  _Daedalus_  checks it out."

"Huh, that means you're able to join me for movie night." Daniel smiled. "No excuses this time."

Sam winced. "I don't think it's such a great idea."

Daniel quirked an eyebrow at her, then fell silent as Sam simply stared out at the gold-glittering sea. He sighed. "They won't throw you out, Sam."

Sam scoffed, but didn't reply. It sure felt like they already had.

"Even so," she said, "I've got my night planned out. Xiaoyi's graciously granted me one of the Jumpers and  _Daedalus_  had some spare equipment that needs packing. I'll be in the Jumper Bay…once I've seen Reika."

"I've been meaning to drop by," Daniel said, his voice softening. "How's she doing?"

"The new treatment seems to be working, albeit slowly. But…it's putting a lot of strain on her body. It might be too much." Sam paused and looked to the blue sky. Her chest tightened a little.

A warm weight touched her elbow on the railing. Daniel smiled sadly at her. "She's a strong girl."

Sam only nodded and took a deep breath. "I don't like leaving her behind."

"We'll look after her. I'm sure John will keep you updated."

 _John…_  For some reason, Sam didn't like leaving him behind either. Her hands tensed on the balcony railing.

"Um, by the way, have you talked to him about…?" Daniel drifted off uncertainly. Not that she could blame him. It wasn't a topic she wanted to broadcast. His knowing about it at all had been an accident.

"No…" Sam's shoulders sagged. "I don't know what to say."

"Did you try 'I'm sorry'?"

"What's the point?" Sam countered, her voice edged. "I'll just mess it up again. Besides, I'm going off-world permanently. We're not gonna hang around much."

Daniel shook his head, putting his hands back into his pockets. He stared out at the sunny horizon. " _Look not mournfully into the past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the present. It is thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy future, without fear."_

Startled, Sam raised an eyebrow. "What's—"

"Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, American poet," Daniel smiled. "Kinda fitting, don't you think?"

Sam didn't know what to say. Apparently, Daniel didn't expect any retort either as he turned towards the door.

"I'll see you later," he said, still smiling, and then disappeared back into the city. Sam was left behind on the balcony to ponder his words.

* * *

 

 

  
_A man isn't poor if he can still laugh._ ~Raymond Hitchcock

* * *

_Sam snorted into her coffee and almost sprayed the liquid all over the chessboard._

_Across from her at the mess hall table, holding a white pawn in his hand, John smirked. "See? I told you it was funny." He placed the pawn on the board and then leaned back._

_"I can just picture Rodney's face…" Sam wiped the coffee drops off her chin and met his amused eyes. "What'd you do then?"_

_John shrugged. "There wasn't much else to do. I mean, he's a pain, but he's kinda important to this city." He sipped his own cup of coffee. "So Teyla kept the king busy while me and Ronon sneaked off to the…um…escort rooms, and got McKay outta there."_

_Picking up a black bishop and replacing one of John's knights with it, Sam shook her head in amazement. "The things that happen to us… You'd think the stargate would be marked with a 'Hazardous' sign."_

_"Might've saved me from some very awkward…stuff." John winced as he leaned forward to survey the chessboard._

_"Like being caught up in the court intrigues of Harmony's sister?" Sam ribbed. "McKay said they painted a very interesting picture of you…"_

_In the process of making his move, John's eyes narrowed and he swore beneath his breath, "Rodney…!"_

_Sam chuckled. "By the way, I'll checkmate you in three."_

_Confused, John stared at the chessboard, his rook forgotten between his fingers. Not that it would've made any difference. "Damn."_

_Hidden behind the rim of her cup, Sam grinned._

* * *

The stairs were dim with late evening light. Only far above did the shine from a full moon outside break the dimness through narrow windows. John ascended the stairs slowly, eyes on the open door ahead.

The Jumper Bay was equally dim, except in a corner where work lights had been set up around one of the Ancient puddle jumpers. A sole figure moved around inside it, and John pushed his hands deep into his pockets. This was it.

As he approached the Jumper, John recognised it as the one he'd flown on Kadara during the Wraith attack. Scorch marks marred the sides and the extended drive pods were dark and unresponsive. Big crates were stacked outside, all marked with the  _Daedalus_  logo. Spare supplies, he supposed.

The crates were forgotten once he heard a curse from the Jumper. He stepped up to the open back hatch. Inside, amidst a tangle of wires hanging from the ceiling, Sam sucked her finger. "Damnit!"

John smirked. The look on Sam's face was familiar. Obviously, something hadn't gone as planned. "Problems?"

"Yeah," Sam groaned without turning, fiddling once more with the wires. "I can't get this damn power distributor to work!" As if she suddenly became aware of his presence, she looked over her shoulder in confusion. "John! You're back? What time is it?"

John looked at his watch. "About eight. We got in a little late. Teyla threw us a feast," he added lightly. As Sam turned to him, his neck tensed, though. He shifted on his feet. "Um, I kinda noticed you forgot something down in the gateroom."

"Yeah, you could say that." Sam grimaced.

"Xiaoyi?" Recalling this morning, John frowned.

Sam shook her head. " _Daedalus_  got intel that suggests one of the Wraith factions might know about Tirana. I sent a team to look after the Tikwee colony tonight, but I won't make the big move until  _Daedalus_  confirms the intel." She sighed and looked at the mess of wires above her. "In the meantime, I'm stuck here."

John glanced around the aft section of the Jumper. Panels were removed, wires stuck out everywhere, and the cabin itself was dark except for the work lights outside. "So…what's with all this?"

"We're taking a Jumper with us for backup, and I got this one." Sam blew out a frustrated breath. "Needs a bit of work, like getting power back online. However, without the ATA gene I can't test my progress."

Frowning, John didn't ask why she hadn't asked for one with the gene on-base to help her out. Instead he said, "Tell me what to do."

With slightly wide eyes, Sam glanced around the interior before nodding towards the cockpit. "Try and turn it on when I give the word. I'm just gonna reconnect all of these," she gestured to the many wires about her.

"Sure," John replied, and stepped into the cabin. As Sam edged close to the wall to let him pass, John's neck tensed further. He hadn't noticed how small the Jumper was before.

He almost let out a breath once he entered the forward section and settled into the pilot's seat. In the background, Sam moved quickly around the aft section, expertly attaching the wires in their correct spot. John watched her in the reflection of the Jumper window, her tall frame bending this way and that, strands of hair loose from her braid. He shook his head of the image when Sam finally gave the word.

"Alright, try it now."

John touched the panel in front of him and focused. The panels burst to life, lights flickered on, and the holographic screen popped up. "Nice," John breathed, still amazed at what a little mind control could do. Seemed like she hadn't been far from her goal, despite her doubts.

"You still got those magic fingers," Sam enthused behind him and John's relaxed muscles tensed again. Sam must've been aware of what she said as well, because she immediately started to fluster around the aft section. "Um, what I meant was – "

"It's okay," John said and swung the chair around.

Sam bit her lip and barely met his eyes. They'd had one glorious second before the elephant rejoined them in the Jumper.

"Um…" John scratched his neck and got to his feet. "I was thinking of heading down to Reika afterwards. Y'know, see how she's doing."

"Right! Yes. Well, she's hanging in there," Sam said, her hands wrung in front of her. She glanced around the cabin. "No change yet."

"Right…" John shifted on his feet. "Well, I just wanted to check on her. Maybe get some workout done after that. Ronon's promised to kick my ass tomorrow. Gotta get in some exercise before that," he added, and he calmed a little when Sam smiled.

"Nice to hear some things don't change," she said, and her shoulders sank a little. A sigh escaped her lips. "I don't think I've done any exercises in months. Keller's started to bug me about it."

John smirked. "'A healthy body, a healthy mind'," he recited and stepped to the divide between the forward and aft section. He leaned against the doorway. "I got something like that too…well, maybe not the kind you got." At this, he grimaced and thought of all the midnight runs and training regimes he'd undergone the past few months.

When he looked up, Sam was biting her lip again and apprehension rushed through him.

"Um… John?" She met his eyes hesitantly. Something stirred in those blue orbs that John hadn't seen since Kadara. "Since I'm not gonna be around here as much anymore… D'you mind if I tag along? I could use the workout…"

"Uh…" John didn't know what to say. A part of him wanted to –

"You know what? Nevermind," Sam said quickly and turned away towards the door. "I'll just go for a run."

An uneasy feeling settled in John's stomach as he saw Sam's back draw away.

"You don't have to do that," he suddenly called after her. As Sam stopped in her tracks and looked back at him with wide eyes, he tried to shrug it off. "I mean, the gym's for everyone."

Sam only stared at him. "You don't mind?"

Stepping around the loose panels and crates inside the Jumper, John followed her outside. His neck was tense, but his words were… "You need the exercise, right? I need a sparring partner."

A wide smile spread across Sam's face and, surprisingly, John's tension lessened a little. His lips twitched too.

"Okay," Sam said, turned fully towards him. "Thanks."

"No problem," John shrugged. "It's a win-win. But I'm not gonna go easy on you."

Sam chuckled and the sound was wonderful. "No holds barred. Colonel."

Recognising the familiar quip, John smirked.

* * *

As John exited the Jumper Bay, Sam sent a silent thanks to Daniel. The archaeologist's wisdom and friendship never ceased to amaze her. Getting rid of her fears, however, wasn't that easy, but maybe one day…

Sam turned back to the Jumper, now turned off again, and sighed at the state of the interior. She had some cleaning up to do before she could think of a workout. Not to mention loading the Jumper with the  _Daedalus_  crates standing outside.

"Did he ask about the crates?"

Sam startled at Caldwell's voice. He suddenly appeared out of the shadows, jumpsuit-clad and wearing that wary look that'd become regular whenever they met in private.

"No," Sam said, a little annoyed at the sudden arrival. She moved inside the Jumper to start reattaching the panels. "How much did you hear?"

"Not much. I just got here." Caldwell followed and stood tall in the doorway, arms crossed as he looked about the Jumper. "It's a good idea for you two to patch up, though."

An icy chill ran down Sam's spine. She forced herself to remain calm. "What'd you mean?"

"I'm not a fool, Carter." Caldwell turned fully towards her. "You had a falling out. I saw the same thing happen to command teams in the Gulf, in Iraq. Losing Earth's affected a lot of us."

Sam tried not to let an obvious breath out. He thought it was just professionally. Good. "It won't happen again."

Caldwell simply nodded, then glanced out of the Jumper. "How much  _does_  he know?"

"I haven't told him anything," Sam said, even if it wasn't completely true. She  _had_  shown him the blueprints. Caldwell had only seen them last week. "But I don't like it. With me on Tirana and you on  _Daedalus_ _,_ we need someone on Atlantis to keep an eye on things."

For a moment, Caldwell peered towards the Jumper Bay exit before he lowered his voice and stepped closer. "I agree, but for now the less who knows, the better. Until we're all sorted."

"Fine." Sam finished reattaching the panel in her hands and peered up at Caldwell. "I'm guessing you didn't come here just to tell me that?"

"No." Caldwell's face took on a dark expression.

* * *

 

 

  
_A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor's book._ ~Irish Proverb

* * *

_"I'm gonna get bored out of my mind," Sam groaned. She wriggled as much as possible in the bed without moving her cast-enclosed leg. "And it's itching."_

_John smirked. "I'll bet you're not one of the doctors' favourite patients?" He stood up and looked around for something while Sam huffed._

_"I've seen more than my share of them," she said. Her features dissolved into a grimace as she accidently moved her leg. "Ouch!"_

_"Easy," John told her, "You don't wanna break your leg again, do you?"_

_Sam sighed and slumped back in the bed. "I just hate this. Did you at least bring my tablet?"_

_Picking up an object from a nearby table, John shook his head "You heard the doctor – you need rest, which means no work. Here," he handed her a long-legged scissors. "Use that to scratch."_

_Sam accepted the scissors gratefully, and sat up so she could reach the cast. "Thanks," she smiled._

_John smiled. "You just take it easy, alright? I'll keep this ship afloat. By the way, I got you something else." He reached into a large pocket on his uniform pants and pulled out a cube-shaped object. "This'll take care of your boredom."_

_Sam chuckled. "A Rubik's Cube?"_

_"Not just any cube." John's eyes twinkled. "It's a V-Cube 7. Got it on last month's shipment."_

_Sam turned the cube in her hands. It was a 7x7x7 cube with curved edges. "Upgrades," she noted._

_"Yeah, just don't let me know how you solved it," John grimaced. Sam held back another laugh, recognising his feigned act of ignorance._

_"Thanks, John. I really appreciate it." She met his eyes, although he quickly shrugged it off as nothing. He rolled on his heels and pushed his hands into his pockets._

_"I'll see about bringing the chessboard around sometime," he said. "You get some sleep, okay?"_

_"I will," Sam smiled, and watched as John silently nodded and left the infirmary. Only one thought was left in her mind: his file hadn't said anything about his compassion and loyalty. She'd seen him extend that to others, but now…she felt included in that band of friends John surrounded himself with._

_Atlantis was starting to feel like it could be a home to her._

* * *

John was running through the series of moves that Teyla had taught him when he felt a weird sensation at the back of his neck. He finished the last stab and tilted his head towards the doorway. Sam stood quiet, dressed in her workout gear, and simply smiled.

"You've improved," she said, and moved inside the gym. She slung her bag into a corner and turned towards him. Her smile fell a little and revealed her apprehension "So…"

"Rods in the rack." John nodded towards one side of the room, where racks with various training equipment were installed. He tried to roll off the tension in his neck as Sam went to the closest rack and picked up a pair of Athosian-styled bantos rods.

As he positioned himself, however, Sam hesitated and faced him. "Look, before we… Um, I need to ask you something." Her features hardened a little and a stone dropped into John's stomach.

"Something wrong?" He gripped the rods tighter in his hands and instinctively straightened.

Fortunately, Sam shook her head, but then looked around as if someone invisible had joined them. "No, it's… I need a favour."

John frowned. "Which kind?"

Sam sighed. "Today, I had to allow Xiaoyi putting ten civilians on the mining site in exchange for additional security for the colony. They all joined the SGC after I left for Atlantis. I don't know anything about them." She met his eyes, her tone low. "I need people I can  _trust_ , John."

"I'm not sure I'm gonna know more about 'em than you," John responded, rolling the rods restlessly in his hands.

"But you know the soldiers." Sam went to her bag, pulled out a piece of paper from an inside pocket and gave it to him. "Could you find 16-20 people with this kind of experience that would be willing to trust me?"

John surveyed the list. His eyebrows shot to the ceiling.

"You  _serious_?"

Sam didn't reply, but her eyes told him everything. His eyes narrowed.

"I know I can't expect you to trust me…" Sam's commander's mask faltered. She sighed. "…but right now I'd really appreciate it." She paused and the look in her eyes changed.

John didn't reply; his jaw stiffened as he glanced between the list and Sam's eyes.

"It's a request, John," Sam added softly. "I don't want to make it an order."

The piece of paper balled in John's hand. He pushed it into a pants pocket and secured it, then whipped out both bantos rods and turned towards Sam. She looked at him, confused.

John raised an eyebrow. "I'm not gonna do it  _now._ Didn't you get the memo our new boss sent out about decent work hours?"

A slight smile spread across Sam's face. Once more, John felt some of his tension lessen and he gestured for her to find her position.

"Now, first off, you can't rush. Find your balance and let the rods be a part of yourself..."

* * *

 

 

  
****Next:**  **"Let's hit the deck."

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chess references in this chapter are a dedication to WritingInCT, who opened my eyes to the idea of a John/Sam relationship. Check out her awesome "Counting In Days" for some J/S goodiness!


	15. DAY 162

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Wraith superhive has been silent...until it attacked the Coalition. Now the Coalition seeks revenge and help from Atlantis, but who will come to their aid?

  ****  


* * *

**FOURTEEN | "Let's hit the deck."**

_Prompt: A time to dance._

* * *

**_Approximately one year_ _, two months earlier…_ **

John Sheppard stood stiffly by the drinks table, punch glass in hand. One hand edged discreetly for the correctly tied tie on his dress blues, obviously itching to loosen it.

Sam stifled a smile when her former 2IC glanced around him before hooking a finger inside the tie knot and pulled slightly. By the looks of it, though, it didn't seem to have helped. Instead, it looked like he'd rather have a P90 in his hands and a horde of Wraith around him.

"Excuse me," Sam told her companions, who were deep in a discussion on the outbreak of recent Lucian Alliance hit-and-runs. General Landry and Major Davis acknowledged her with nods, General O'Neill with an exasperated 'help me' roll of his eyes. Sam hid another smile at the latter and moved off.

John looked up as Sam approached the drinks table. Sam finally succumbed and gave him a smile before she turned to the waiter manning the table.

"Could I get one more?" She held up her empty glass. "John?"

"No thanks, I'm all set," John showed his own, suspiciously untouched, glass. Upon closer look, Sam thought she saw those slight tension lines in his face that showed his uneasiness.

The waiter returned her now full punch glass, and Sam sidled up to John's side, sipping the cool drink. "I'm surprised to see you here," she began, testing the waters.

John shrugged. "Came to deliver the monthly status report to the IOA and they extended their invitation. Thought I'd scope out the place." He pushed one hand inside his pants pocket, eyes on the crowd of SGC and IOA personnel. "Didn't think it'd be this full."

"It's not every day Homeworld Security gets a name change," Sam said.

John smirked in return, an eyebrow raised, and Sam knew he'd caught on. A name change was understating it. It was being upgraded to an office with much more real power than it'd held previously. All due to the increased threats from the Lucian Alliance.

Speaking of threats…

"How's Pegasus?" Sam asked, her tone more serious.

The look on John's face darkened. His grip on the glass tightened. However, he met her eyes with a distinctly out-of-place smile. "Fine. Long days at the beach, surfing', barbeques. Oh, and the occasional life-sucking parasite. Nothing new, I s'pose."

Sam didn't smile. Instead, she held back a sigh and forced herself to remain calm. "I wish—"

"Argh!" General O'Neill appeared abruptly at their side, glaring at Sam. He glanced back at General Landry and Major Davis, then again to Sam. "Carter!"

Sam managed a smirk. "Sorry, sir."

O'Neill waved her off. "Ah, never mind. Next time I'm bringin' Daniel. He  _likes_  talking for me." The pout over, he seemed to take notice of John at Sam's side. "Sheppard."

"General," John nodded, his look indiscernible.

O'Neill looked from Sam to John and at the obvious tension still in their faces. "So…drinks?"

"I'm okay, sir," Sam smiled. She glanced at John, who showed his still full glass and began to sip it. A grimace crossed his face at the taste, but he quickly hid it.

"Ah." O'Neill sipped his own punch and then cleared his throat. "So, Sheppard, how're things in Pegasus?"

"Quiet, sir." John shifted uneasily on his feet. "Seems like we caught a break with Michael gone."

"That's good," said O'Neill, giving John an appraising look. "How's Woolsey getting along?"

The slightly dark, tense look on John's face was unmistakable. "Alright, sir."

O'Neill raised an eyebrow. "He's not so bad. Unlike one of those egotistical, self-centred bast—"

"Sir," Sam interjected, seeing two of Woolsey's associates from the SGC – Shen Xiaoyi and James Coolidge – passing close by the drinks table.

O'Neill snapped his mouth shut, but only until they'd passed. Then he stared meaningfully at John. "Woolsey's okay. Got that?"

John's jaw tightened. "Permission to speak freely, sir?" O'Neill nodded reluctantly, his brows furrowed, and Sam tensed. "We already had an excellent commander."

A warm blush spread across her cheeks. Sam quickly dipped her head. When she looked up, O'Neill wore a half-smile and his eyes had softened.

"I'm not sayin' you didn't," he said. Then his features hardened and he straightened. "The IOA's gonna make sure Woolsey stays, though, so be nice."

"Yes, sir," John reluctantly muttered.

O'Neill nodded, apparently satisfied with the answer, but still giving John a second look in case he changed his mind. He didn't – a testament to his sense of duty. He'd test the boundaries, but he'd never go against General O'Neill.

"So …" O'Neill began, but before he could continue, one of the Joint Chiefs called out for him from the drinks table. Stifling a groan, he muttered, "Duty calls …" Sam smirked. "I guess I'll see you kids later."

Sam followed O'Neill with her eyes until he'd met up with yet another group of Air Force big shots. Then she turned back to John, who looked even more out of place than before. He'd drunk his punch and now held the empty glass awkwardly.

Sam quieted and gave John a sidelong glance. "Beer?" Sam gave him a sly grin. "There's a bar just down the road."

John nodded towards O'Neill and the others. "Sure 'bout that?"

"I think we can sneak out and back in without anyone noticing. Think of it like special ops."

Apparently, the thought seemed to calm him and John's eyes glinted in amusement. The transformation from the tense, dark expression was momentous. "Sounds like a plan, Colonel."

They turned to go when Sam reached out and touched John's arm. His eyebrow rose. "By the way … thanks," she smiled. "I appreciate the support."

John smirked, and some of the tension seeped out of his face.

* * *

**DAY 162**

"No."

From her seat behind the crisply clean and clutter-free desk, Xiaoyi didn't move a muscle. Her eyes simply bore into John's, her tone firm. "It's too risky."

"Y'know, the military's job  _is_  to take risks." John argued, leaning forward on the desktop.

"Colonel, you're proposing an attack on an up and running Wraith outpost!"

"Science lab," John corrected impatiently. "They're not nearly as well protected as an outpost. Besides, we've infiltrated them before."

"Although not always without casualties, am I right?" Xiaoyi raised an eyebrow. She let out a sigh and dipped her head. "Colonel—"

"I'd only take experienced personnel," John quickly interjected, lowering to her eye-level. He struggled to keep his voice calm and reasonable. "A small four-man recon team. We could get in and out in less than an hour."

"Such as your own team, I suppose?" Xiaoyi shook her head and folded her hands primly on the desktop. Her lips pressed together. "No, I cannot let you do that. You're too valuable for such a …  _suicide_  mission."

"Look, we don't _abandon_ our people!" John hissed, his finger pointed at the impeccably dressed Chinese, his eyes seeing red.

"The Coalition's people, Colonel," Xiaoyi replied swiftly, her expression stony. "Not ours."

And that, John supposed, was the crux of the matter. Xiaoyi didn't really care that a recon mission into the Wraith lab could get them a download of their entire database – which in theory meant they could work out what the hell the Wraith were up to these days and where they were based. All she cared about was the survival of Atlantis in Earth's hands, even if it meant the rest of the Pegasus galaxy could go to hell. Just another proof that Atlantis had gone to the dogs.

"The Coalition asked us for help," John continued in a very low, dangerous voice. "I'm can't just sit here while the Wraith tear 'em apart!"

Xiaoyi wasn't swayed. "I'm deeply sorry for the loss of their colonies, Colonel – I am – but this is none of our business. As far as I know, the Genii are still part of that Coalition and they're fully capable of defending themselves and their allies."

"With their unsafe nukes that'll just kill them slower," John gritted out. "This is  _ridiculous_!" He pushed off the desk angrily and fisted his hands. "If  _Sam_ had been here—"

"Colonel Carter's  _not_  the commander of this city!" Xiaoyi snapped, her voice rising. She nearly jumped out of her seat. Her nostrils flared in silent anger. "You should take care to  _remember_  that, Colonel."

John's jaw clenched tightly. He didn't reply.

"Now," Xiaoyi continued in a calmer but icier voice as she rose deliberately to her feet and smoothed her suit jacket. "I'm sorry,  _Lieutenant Colonel_ , but my answer is  _no_."

She picked up a stack of folders from the corner of her desk and began to move towards the wooden door. "You're welcome to take it up in the council meeting, but I've got a feeling that they'll agree with me." She reached the door and held it open for him, a challenging look on her tight-lipped face.

John glared at her. "Don't count on it," he grumbled and stormed past her and across the catwalk leading to the operations centre. Instead of going for the stairs, he went to the communications console. "How long 'till  _Daedalus_ gets here?"

The gate technician he'd addressed went quickly through something on his tablet interface. "Approximately two hours, sir."

That'd be just in time for the council meeting. "Can you link me up?" John asked, giving Xiaoyi a decisive glower as she passed by them towards the conference room. "I'd like to have a word with Colonel Caldwell."

* * *

The  _thud_  of the golf ball as John dropped it and picked it up on top of his desk was the only sound in the small office for a long while. Then, suddenly, Ronon broke the monotony.

"We could sneak out."

The thought had occurred to John as well, but it was not without consequences. "Xiaoyi would find out. She's got some of her own people manning the stargate day and night."

The last thing John needed was for others to see him break the rules – Sam had told him so before she left. People from both camps – those against and those in support of Xiaoyi's leadership – still looked up to him. And John didn't have the conscience to send someone else on a secret mission when he was the one to defy the base commander's orders.

"Get Campbell or Banks on it," Ronon suggested. He was perched on the windowsill, slowly sharpening the knife he usually kept strapped to his leg.

"I'm not draggin' anyone else into this. It's either us or no one." It was clear by Ronon's look and John's tone that none were too happy with the latter thought.

"I don't like it," Ronon muttered for emphasis.

"That makes two of us." John checked his watch. It'd been hours already. How long was the damn meeting supposed to last?

As if by lucky chance, the door to John's office opened and the balding, jumpsuit-clad Caldwell stepped inside. John quickly got to his feet and Ronon halted in his blade-sharpening.

"Well?" John prompted.

The grim expression on Caldwell's face made his insides twist."The council voted no, seven to two. I'm sorry."

" _Goddamnit_!" John's hand fisted around the golf ball until his knuckles whitened. "You told them this could possibly earn us a couple of allies, right?"

Caldwell nodded, his arms crossed. "I did. They weren't too impressed, especially given our previous run-ins with the Coalition and the reputation of the Genii. Said it was too dangerous and most likely a trap – like the Bhaati. They seem to think it's in our best interests to think about our own survival first, then in the future—"

"—there might not be anyone left." John interrupted, his voice rising. He gritted his teeth and nearly flung the golf ball into the opposite wall.

"I  _agree_ , but it's not up to us, Sheppard." Caldwell's jaw clenched and he stepped further into the room. "The IOA's got the majority vote and control of the city. We'll just have to make the best out of it."

John didn't have any reply. Caldwell looked from him to Ronon, who'd taken to sharpening his knife with a very dark look, and back again. He stepped closer to John. "Look, I've done what I could. There's no changing their minds on this."

"I'll be sure to pass that on to the Coalition," John sneered coldly. "They'll be real pleased."

Caldwell raised an eyebrow. "Sheppard, I don't like this any more than you do, but my hands are tied.  _I_ can't help you." He paused, then gave John a silent, pensive appraisal.

John's eyes narrowed suspiciously. To the side, Ronon straightened in his seat, his eyes still dark but alert.

Caldwell gave them both a second, calculated look.

And with a sudden twist of his insides, John realized what Caldwell insinuated. "Sam."

With a derisive jerk and jump to his feet, Ronon growled. "What good's  _she_ gonna do  _us_?"

Uneasy at the implication in his best friend's tone, John looked back at Caldwell with a frown.

The senior colonel narrowed his eyes at Ronon, his tone equally hard in the face of the Satedan's disrespect. "You won't know until you try," he stated, and then swung his stare to John. "Will you?"

Ronon gave a disdainful snort and turned back to the window. He clenched the knife tightly in his hand as he surveyed the outside view.

Caldwell ignored him, fully turned towards John now. "You nearly made yourself an enemy today," he stated seriously. " _Don't_ worsen it. Atlantis needs you  _here,_ not exiled on some godforsaken outpost. Are we clear? _"_

John's hands fisted. Right now, the thought of being off Atlantis for a while didn't seem so bad. Still, he gritted out, "Yes, sir," like any obedient subordinate would.

Caldwell searched his eyes, but was apparently satisfied. "Good." He began to turn, then paused and looked back. "Consider my suggestion. Let me know what you decide."

With that said, Caldwell left. The door closed behind him, leaving John and Ronon alone in the sunlit room. Ronon swung around and glared at him, the knife tight in his grip. "You believe him?"

John didn't immediately reply. His mind worked hard as the anger slowly ebbed away. Less than three weeks ago, Sam had asked him to trust her. He had, just like when she'd trusted him with her secrets.

Then again, he hadn't seen her since she'd left for the colony. All he'd heard since then were radio updates on the construction process and the odd update from the stargate security teams stationed at the colony. Summed up, it wasn't a helluva lot.

"Ask me later," John said finally, straightening. He put the golf ball down on his desk and flexed his stiff fingers.

Ronon didn't look happy.

* * *

A hot and ruthless sun met John as he stepped through the stargate to M4R-621. He squinted as a group of people by the DHD gradually came into focus, his free hand automatically reaching for the P90 he'd left behind on Atlantis. The other held a brown paper bag.

"Welcome to Tirana, Colonel," Captain Reese Matthews greeted with a salute.

John returned the salute briefly before putting on his aviator sunglasses. "Is it always this hot?"

Matthews grinned a little. "Today's your lucky day, sir. The water isn't boiling."

"You don't say," John mumbled. He ran his gaze across the small area. The stargate stood in a wide-open clearing, a sparse cluster of trees surrounding it. Next to the DHD, the day-shift security team were posted at two defensive positions. One of them sported a machine gun pointed straight at the stargate.

"Colonel Carter's been notified of your arrival, sir," Matthews continued. "Would you like me to take you to her?"

"No, that's alright, Captain," John waved her off. "I just have to follow that path, right?" He gestured to a narrow path that cut through the trees and disappeared westwards.

"Yes, sir." Matthews nodded. "It'll take you straight to the Tikwee colony. The mining camp is a little further beyond that." She stepped back to join her team, nestling her P90 comfortably in her arms. "Enjoy your stay, sir."

Nodding in thanks, John moved on.

The trip through the sparse forest was short and John soon found himself at the edge of vast fields of what looked like yellow wheat and barley, but was probably the Pegasus equivalent. The sun was scorching hot, already making sweat run down his neck and under the edge of his T-shirt. It nearly reminded him of Afghanistan, except the locale was much more pleasing to look at.

The Tikwee colony lay on the other side of the fields, a clutter of cottages and two-storied buildings ranging in dozens. John could see people milling about outside, most of them dressed in simple cottons and looking noticeably rural.

As he approached the village, however, he spotted what was probably its only advanced technological feature: one of the railguns Earth had transported to Atlantis years ago to stave off a Wraith aerial invasion. It looked out of place among the simple-clad Tikwee colonists, as did the two BDU-clad soldiers seated languidly next to it.

"Colonel," one of the soldiers greeted when he saw him. It was Sergeant Ramirez, the guy he'd sent for a cool-off in a cell along with Sergeant Nelson more than once. He didn't look half as restless as he'd been then.

"How's it goin', Sergeant?" John asked, pushing his spare hand into his pocket.

"Can't complain, sir." Ramirez shrugged. "The Tikwees treat us good. Actually seem happy to have us around."

Given the level of protection they could offer, John wasn't surprised. "You stayin' out of fights?"

"Yes, sir." Ramirez half-grinned. "I'm clean. Can't vouch for Emerson, though." He nudged his partner good-naturedly, who objected loudly. John smirked, a little of the tension in his neck easing up.

"Seen Colonel Carter around?" he asked, breaking off the banter between the two soldiers.

"Try the mines, sir," Emerson suggested, pointing beyond the village. Large mountains rose up behind the cottages. "She's there most of the time."

John thanked him and then moved on. As he passed the Tikwee colonists, most of them greeted him with curious but unsurprised smiles – as if he was a sight they'd become familiar with – and he couldn't help but feel almost welcomed. None of them seemed close to draw a weapon on him, and that was saying something these days.

It was a very nice change.

After a trudge up a small hill, John stopped to stare out across the small valley before him. A neat river ran across the valley from the mountains, culminating in a large lake to his left. There were some scattered clusters of trees, with several lodge cabins situated between them. Another railgun position was placed next to the lake in the cover of some trees. It wouldn't be easily seen from the air.

Beyond the cabins he saw people moving back and forth between a large reinforced opening in the mountainside and a few green SGC-commissioned tents. A group of them seemed to be pulling an old-style wagon from the mountainside and down towards the tents.

John looked back at the cabins. Most likely, Sam would be cooped up in one of them, pouring over some computer screen until her eyes went blurry. Maybe working on those schematics she'd shown him nearly two months ago.

He started down the hillside and checked the cabins as he went. The two closest ones were barracks, a third some sort of mess and recreational area, and the last two were combined lab/offices. Sam, however, wasn't in any of them.

John stood outside the last cabin, a frown on his face, when he finally heard her voice.

"Watch that hole!"

He glanced up towards the green tents and froze.

At the head of the group pulling the loaded wagon was Sam. Only, she didn't look like the Sam he'd seen last. Clad in rolled-up BDU pants and a tank top, her slightly tan muscles glistened as she pulled the wagon behind her along with three others. Her hair clung to her scalp and her cheeks were flushed.

She looked like he remembered _._ The old Sam.

John stood stunned as they heaved the wagon to a halt among the tents. Sam didn't pause. Instead she called out orders and joined the rest with unloading large, black piles of rocks from the wagon. No one hesitated to help her out. They even shared laughs and smiles at some inside banter.

John shook himself out of the reverie and approached the tents. Sam had finished the unloading by the time he reached them, and was pushing back her bangs when she spotted him.

A full-blown smile spread across her face. "John!"

"Colonel," John returned a little awkwardly. He glanced around at everyone who seemed to take notice of him. He saw a _lot_ of familiar faces. Was this what she'd needed those people with special skills for? Mine grunts?

"I heard you were coming in," Sam said as she stepped closer. She'd picked up a towel and now wiped her face free of sweat and dirt. A thin sheen of sweat covered her chest and arms as well, John noticed. "You want a look around?"

Caught a little off guard, John nodded. "Sure. I brought lunch." He held up the brown paper bag he'd brought along.

"Great! I'm starving." Sam grinned. Then she turned to the other personnel clustered around the tents. "Go get yourselves something to eat and drink. We'll continue this later on."

* * *

"Quite a project you've got goin' here," John said later in amazement as they ate their sandwiches at Sam's proclaimed favourite spot – a log in the shadow of a large willow-like tree next to the lake. The branches drooped low to graze the top of the water, causing ringlets to spread out from the epicentre.

They'd visited the cabins and the mines. Sam had shown him the process the rocks went through from drilling to testing of traces of naquadah and trinium. They'd also passed through the Tikwee village again while Sam told him about their companionable relationship to the colonists. All the while, John had noticed one prominent change: Sam smiled a lot more than she'd used to before she came here.

Sam shrugged. "It's taken some doing, but it's going well. Much better than I expected, to be honest." She bit into her chicken sandwich and spoke while chewing. "We're still having some trouble with the drills, but all in all, I'm pleased with our progress so far. There are a lot of hard-working people here."

"Including you," John noted, half-smirking. He ate his sandwich more slowly, not really hungry. The impressions so far were a little overwhelming. Not too long ago, he'd barely been able to look at Sam as she'd become after they lost Earth. Now...things were different. Like the previous five months had never happened. She even seemed open with him again.

Sam blushed a little. "It feels good to do something with my hands again. I don't want to stay rooted to a chair this time around."

John could sympathise with that sentiment. With Xiaoyi in charge, the off-world missions had been cut back to a bare minimum and he still had the problem of too many restless people on base. Including himself.

"Well, you look good," John said lowly, and his neck tensed when Sam's cheeks reddened again. Still, he didn't take it back. He meant it. "Maybe getting away from Atlantis wasn't such a bad idea..." he continued hesitantly. At the moment, he half wished he'd joined her, if only to see her smile on a regular basis again. He'd missed that.

Sam didn't quite meet his eyes. A sad look crossed her face before she could hide it behind a half-smirk. "Maybe."

They lapsed into a silence John was surprised didn't feel more tense, even with his admission, Sam's brief relapse, and the weight of his question on his mind. It was almost like when they'd been simply friends. Before things got complicated, and before they lost Earth.

"So how're things out there?" Sam asked finally. She'd finished her sandwich and now leaned back on the log against the tree trunk of the willow. She met his eyes steadily. The atmosphere instantly changed.

John hesitated. What he'd seen so far – a happy, healthy Sam getting along with most of her subordinates – would that disappear once he told her about the Coalition's request and his own proposal?

"John," Sam prompted, leaning forward with a deep frown. Her tone was serious. "Spit it out."

"The Coalition lost three of its planets to attacks like the ones on Avros and Kadara last week." John's fingers dug into the remains of the sandwich. His eyes narrowed. "You know what  _that_  means."

"Yeah… We knew they might turn on other human planets," Sam said quietly. A guilty look crossed her face before she let out a small breath and straightened. "I'm guessing the Coalition found a way to contact you. What do they want?"

"Help," John said simply. "They want to retaliate, and to figure out if the Wraith know where their other colonies are." He looked down at his ruined sandwich and threw the pieces into the lake. Nearly immediately, a couple of birds flew down and swooped them up in their beaks.

"How?" Sam frowned.

"They've got the location of a Wraith science lab from the Genii. It's still active, but it's small and with minimum security. It's ideal for an infiltration. The goal's the Wraith database. It should give us the location of most Wraith outposts and planets."

John observed the birds mesmerised, his anger seeping away. In its place he only felt cool, reasonable logic. It was familiar, almost comforting. Xiaoyi and the IOA were miles away.

"Sounds like a good deal," Sam agreed, but she still frowned a little. "So why've they turned to us? Why not get it themselves?"

John had asked himself that difficult question. The council seemed to think it was a trap, but he wanted to think the best of the Coalition. They'd gotten on better terms with them after the impromptu Inquisition last year. Even the Genii had reached out with an olive branch before the Wraith superhive began to wreak havoc.

"They're 'relocating' their people," John said finally, his fists clenched briefly. "All security's tied up in that. Besides," he continued quickly – a sliver of desperation entered his voice – before Sam could challenge him, "We both know the Coalition doesn't have the means or experience to pull off something like this."

Sam looked very thoughtful. She met his eyes straight on, studying him, and John tried to convey all his belief and resolve in his stare. For a second, it felt like it was just the two of them again; commander and 2IC conferring on an issue. Just a second, but it was enough.

Sam sighed and leaned further forward. "The Genii might be capable of it, but we've got no idea how far they've advanced since the last time we met. They've been extremely isolationistic."

It was sort of an agreement, far more than it was a counter-argument. John nearly let out a sigh of relief. He mimicked Sam's position, eager to continue.

"Even so, what would they do with that kind of information?" he asked. "They barely have any spaceships and none that are capable of taking on a  _normal_  Hive ship."

"It'd be beneficial for us too," Sam agreed. " _Daedalus_ could monitor the Wraith actions. We'd get a head start if something happened." Then she raised her eyebrow at him. "Why're you telling  _me_ , though?"

"Xiaoyi and the council think it's too dangerous. That it might be a trap set out to catch us. Caldwell can't help. So…" He drifted off, suddenly finding it difficult to actually ask the question he'd come here to ask. Gone was the comforting feeling of nostalgia, of companionship. Reality came rushing back.

Sam's whole demeanour changed. She stiffened and stared steadily out on the lake. "What makes you certain I'll be able to help? Xiaoyi and the council don't trust me."

John didn't have a reply. Sam did have a point. Her political pull was like zero on Atlantis these days. Still, Caldwell's statement had rung true: so far, things seemed to have changed. And most importantly, this wasn't Atlantis. This was  _Sam's_ base.

"You asked me to trust you once," John began slowly, his tone determined. He narrowed his eyes at her. "I know you've worked on stuff behind the IOA's back. You're saying there's  _nothing_ you can do?"

Sam turned to meet his eyes, her blue orbs glinting. Her lips had thinned, but there was no anger in her features. Only unwavering resolve and that last, tiny speck of challenge. They both knew the stakes of what John was asking.

"It's not a trap," John said firmly. His hand reached out to cover hers before he noticed. Neither dropped their gaze. " _Trust_  me."

* * *

"I never get to go anywhere anymore," McKay pouted. He stood on the end of the platform, arms crossed, a sulky look on his face.

John nearly rolled his eyes, hands deep in the pockets of his leather jacket. "It's no big thing, Rodney. Just some boring dinner with the locals."

"Then why does  _he_ get to go?" McKay pointed at Ronon, who stood off to the side of the platform, adjusting the sleeves of his old brownish coat. Even unarmed, he looked menacing.

Ronon raised an eyebrow. "'Cause I'm bigger."

McKay, apparently, didn't find it funny. "That's  _so_ not fair!"

"Rodney," John interjected before McKay got his whole tirade out for the third time since they'd gotten out of the transporter. "Tell you what: you can come next time. I'll make sure they don't serve lemons." McKay kept pouting. John shook his head. "Didn't Sam send you some rocks to squint at?"

McKay blew out an angry puff and swung his arms out in exasperation as he turned to leave. "This is  _so_ typical! You're always hogging all the fun."

Now John  _did_ roll his eyes and chose to ignore him as he disappeared out of the room. He called up to the operations centre, "Dial it up, Doctor."

The gate technician on duty, Li Shang, who was one of Xiaoyi's supporters like John had predicted, acknowledged and the stargate began to spin.

John met Ronon's dark eyes. "Ready?"

The Satedan only grunted and moved into position. No matter how much John had tried to say things were different, Ronon still wasn't happy about the situation. John held back a sigh, consciously aware of the dark-haired woman seated up in the glass office. Another argument about chain of command here would only arouse suspicion.

Xiaoyi followed him with her eyes until they'd stepped through the stargate.

Four weapons clicked immediately as they exited the event horizon. Captain Matthews's security team had trained their sights on them. No smiles were on their faces this time around.

"Stand down," Sam ordered firmly, stepping out from the darkened cluster of trees. In the reddish light from the setting sun, John could see she was dressed in black BDUs, her hair pulled under a black cap, and a P90 was attached to her TAC vest. She eyed them narrowly. "Anyone stop you?"

Meeting her eyes equally, John shook his head. "Said the Tikwee invited us for dinner. McKay's upset he couldn't come."

Sam smiled tightly. "Let's hope that'll change. Hailey?" She turned and gestured to a young, similarly dressed captain, who stepped forward with a bag. The woman opened it and handed out its contents: spare BDU jacket, two TAC vests, P90s, M4s and even a stun weapon for Ronon.

John shrugged out of his off-duty leather jacket, and put on the BDU jacket and vest. He checked its pockets and was satisfied to find spare clips, grenades and several packs of C4. The familiarity made him relax.

"We scouted the planet earlier," Sam told Ronon and John as they got ready. "No guards at the stargate and the DHD is good. Got a strong energy signal about a klick north from the stargate. Most likely our target. Hailey's got the ATA gene therapy, so she'll be our sensor."

The captain fished out an Ancient life signs detector for emphasis and looked to her commanding officer.

"We'll move on foot," Sam continued, as she crouched down and began to draw lines like a map in the dirt with her knife. "There are swamps and marshes to the west, and a cliff like the Grand Canyon to the east, but fortunately a lot of cover in-between. We didn't encounter any guards, so we'll probably get to the lab all right. We'll set up some claymores along the path in case we pick up someone on the way back."

With the track record they all had in their respective galaxies, John agreed wholeheartedly.

"We'll settle on a game plan once we get to the Wraith lab, but remember: this is an infiltration mission. We don't go in guns blazing. Silent kills, if possible." Sam looked specifically at Ronon. "Ronon, I want you on point. Any questions?"

John watched Ronon uneasily. The Satedan's dark eyes bore into Sam's, like a silent battle of wills. But Sam met him punch for punch, unflinching even as Ronon's obvious dislike showed in his face.

Finally, he grunted, "No."

"Then let's move out," Sam said firmly and got to her feet. Only when she broke eye contact did Ronon look away. "Captain, you know the drill."

"Yes, ma'am!" Matthews responded sharply. "We'll check in two hours from now if you haven't returned." She looked back at Ramirez, who was stationed by the DHD. "Sergeant, dial up the planet."

* * *

Only the slightest buzz of insects and the roar of a nearby waterfall sounded in the air. John peered above the large pile of rocks he'd taken cover behind. About twenty feet ahead, dark and ominous in the shadows of towering mountains, stood the unmistakable Wraith organic structure.

He glanced sideways and met Sam's eyes where she'd hidden behind a thick, mossy tree. With only the barest rustle of twigs and leaves under her feet, she crouched and moved to his side. Captain Jennifer Hailey and Ronon were already crouched close by.

"I'm reading five life signs in the north-east part of the structure," Hailey reported in a whisper after checking the Ancient scanner device.

"Close to the main energy source?" Sam asked, her eyes on the Wraith structure.

"No, ma'am." Hailey mused at the device's screen. "There's a strong transmitting signal coming from that area, though."

"Must be the control room," John said. He nestled his P90 comfortably in his arms, also glancing at the structure ahead. If the control room was full of Wraith, it was a no-go. They'd have to try something else. "Last time we went to one of these labs, McKay managed to hack into their network from a research console."

Sam looked thoughtful. "Hailey, can you pick up any other significant energy outputs?"

Hailey pursued the scanner intently, making some adjustments to the parameters. "There are two strong outputs apart from the main energy source. One of them is on the eastern part, close to the entrance. No life signs close by."

"Then that's our goal," Sam decided. She squatted down beside John and pulled her two packs of C4 from her vest pockets. "We should split up. Ronon, take Captain Hailey with you and set up charges in one of the power relay rooms." She handed the C4 to Hailey, who pocketed it without question. "Colonel Sheppard and I will head for the research lab. Get there when you're done." She picked up her P90 and held it at the ready. "Once we've downloaded what we can, we'll get the hell out of there and set off the charges. Hopefully without drawing any attention to ourselves."

"No heroics," John said lowly, giving Ronon a second look although it was as much a message to himself as to the Satedan.

Sam's eyes softened briefly and John tensed a little. Then she broke off eye contact and got to her feet. The rest of them followed suit. "Let's maintain radio silence unless something comes up," she said, her tone determined. "Move out."

Ronon moved before she'd finished, leaving Hailey to hurry up after him with a slightly anxious look. Staring after them, Sam frowned, but didn't comment.

* * *

Richard Woolsey observed the glass office in hesitation. Inside, a single desk lamp cast Shen Xiaoyi's face in sharp contrast where she sat perusing her computer tablet. It made her features seem even more severe than usual.

With a deep sigh, Woolsey bridged the gap between the operations centre and the wooden door. The knock on wood was alien in this metallic city, and promptly reminded him of Earth. It made his insides twist.

"Come in," sounded Xiaoyi's reply and Woolsey entered, closing the door behind him. Xiaoyi's eyes were narrowed, almost suspiciously. "Richard."

"Shen," he greeted and halted in front of the desk. "I hope I'm not interfering," he said politely.

"Not at all," Xiaoyi put the computer tablet down, her features barely twitching in a polite smile. "I'm just reading a report from Tirana. Seems like Colonel Carter will provide us with our first shipment shortly, pending the analysis made by Dr McKay."

"That's good news. And ahead of schedule," Woolsey said in amazement. "I didn't think we'd receive anything for another three weeks."

"Yes, it is quite a surprise." Xiaoyi smiled mirthlessly. "But I'm sure you did not come here to talk about naquadah, Richard. Is there something on your mind?"

Woolsey stiffened, then steeled himself for the inevitable. "As a matter of fact, there is. I do not think it was wise to dismiss Colonel Sheppard's proposal so readily."

"You'd want to see him and his team die?" Xiaoyi raised an eyebrow, the shadows dancing on her face. He didn't like the tone of her voice.

"Of course not," Woolsey said quickly, affronted at the suggestion. "I just don't think the idea of extending a friendly hand to the Coalition would be so bad. We could certainly benefit from a few friends here in this galaxy now that we've lost—"

"I've seen what the friends of this galaxy do to each other for a moment of respite from the Wraith," Xiaoyi interrupted, leaning forward in her chair with a thin-lipped expression. Her eyes were cold.

Woolsey contained his sigh. "Not everyone are like the Bhaati, Shen. The Athosians and the Kadarians have been very kind to us."

"And in the past five years, the Genii have invaded Atlantis twice," Xiaoyi stated unfazed. "I will not give them a third chance. This is our  _home_ , Richard."

And for a moment, Woolsey thought he'd heard her tone crack just a little, but her icy facade didn't waver.

"Shen," he said softly. "We've got to learn how to trust each other. Even with Atlantis and  _Daedalus_ , we will only hold our own against the Wraith for so long. If we want to survive…" He drifted off, his palms up in an open, honest gesture. "…we need friends. And we need to be out  _there_  to find them. We can't hide in this city forever."

Xiaoyi stared at him, her stony expression unchanged. "I  _won't_ send our people on suicide missions, Richard, and that's  _final_."

It was, Woolsey realised, and he left not long after with a polite goodbye. Xiaoyi only asked him to close the door behind him and he left her in the darkened glass office. When he looked back from the operations centre, he didn't feel anger or despair.

Only pity.

* * *

They'd reached the research chamber undetected and in complete silence. Once they called out "Clear", Sam moved towards one of the main consoles and flung off her backpack. The gesture seemed so fluid that John began to wonder if she'd done this recently, or if it was the old habit two years as a base commander hadn't dampened. He'd been surprised when she'd told them they'd scouted this planet earlier the same day. She must've done it immediately after he returned to Atlantis. Without hesitation.

"So, you do this often?" John asked as he crouched by the chamber's only entrance. The feel of the P90 in his hand was familiar and comforting, so was the mission they were on. He almost smirked. This was how it should be.

Sam chuckled. "Not in a while, no. Funny thing about being in charge is that you don't get out as much as you used to."

John checked the empty corridor outside and then looked back at her. "Tell me about it. I half expect we'll need to get permission to go to the mess soon."

"Let's hope you won't have to ask when you want to use the loo," Sam said as she plugged several thick wires under the console. John's eyes followed the wires and recognised one of the devices Rodney had developed to make the transition between Wraith and Earth technology easier to accomplish. Another of those things he wanted to ask where she'd gotten - she seemed to have acquired more than was stated in the original equipment manifest she'd given Xiaoyi.

"Xiaoyi, a Drill Sergeant? That's a scary thought," John said wryly. The image conjured in his head clashed horribly with reality. From the across the room, Sam grinned and John looked back at the corridor again. It was still empty and silent.

Sam operated in silence for a while as John kept an alert lookout. He observed her through the corner of his eye. Her motions were fluid and rarely uncertain, and when she leaned over her computer tablet she bit her lower lip in a familiar gesture of concentration. It made him smile inwardly.

It was almost like old times. He loved the feeling.

"Alright, I'm in," Sam said, her voice sudden in the silence. " _Wow_."

"What?" John looked over his shoulder. A display had lit up in front of Sam. She stared at it transfixed.

"I think I know why they've left us alone lately," she said and pushed several buttons. A map appeared on the display, then it zoomed in on a specific region in space. Sam pointed at several white dots. "Those are the Coalition's planets that were attacked." She punched another button. A line appeared along the planets, much like a plotted path. Just outside one of the planets, John recognised ten blinking beacons. "See this?"

John's stomach turned to ice. "Hive ships. Where're they headed?"

"That's just it," Sam shook her head, half-amazed. "Their target's not a human planet. It's this one." She pointed to a red dot and looked at him. "According to the data, it's the Wraith superhive."

"Wait," John frowned and leaned back so he could get a better look. "They're targeting their  _own_?"

"Looks that way," Sam said, glancing back at the display. She chewed her lip. "We know the superhive attacked the Coalition's planets, so my guess is that it knew those Hive ships were coming. And…" She hesitated, her eyes locked with his as realisation hit.

"…and they figured they'd poison the water holes," John said darkly.

Sam looked uneasy. "So to speak." She stared at the display for a long while. Then, silently, she shut down the display and cleared her throat. "I'm beginning the download."

"Hopefully, they won't notice," John said, but his grip tightened around the P90 nonetheless. The mood had changed and neither of them smirked anymore. They were back to the professional discipline deeply ingrained in them from years of training and experience.

The Wraith civil war was pushed far away to the back of his mind, and John's focus narrowed to the silent, dark corridor outside.

* * *

Hailey stuck the detonation transmitter into the pack of C4 and activated it. Nodding at the green light, she glanced over at her tall companion. "You don't talk much, do ya?"

Ronon just gave her a quick stare in reply. The reaction was simple, as she'd expected, and his demeanour was the same. She didn't know what she'd done to offend him, however, so she shrugged it off. "I met a guy like you once. He smiled more, though."

Ronon, again, didn't reply. He continued fastening the C4 charges Hailey gave him to thick sticky veins along the organic walls of the power relay chamber.

Hailey made a face. This  _thing_ they were in was gross. It almost made her wish this were a Ha'Tak. It'd be cleaner when they blew it up. As it was, Hailey envisioned exploding fireworks of rotten meat and entrails raining down on them like a bad B-rated alien critters invasion movie. The thought made her sick.

Attaching a detonation transmitter to the last C4 charge, Hailey leaned against one of the consoles and fished the remote detonator out of her pocket. She ran a check on it and made sure the transmission to the charges was strong and green.

"Did you ever meet Teal'c?" she asked finally, feeling the need to fill the silence. "I heard he went to Atlantis once. You'd have lots to talk about."

If possible, Ronon's look darkened. It intrigued Hailey.

"So you met him? He's a good friend of Colonel Carter." At that, Ronon wrenched the C4 from her hands and quickly turned around. Hailey blew a frustrated breath. So her suspicions had merit. "What do you have against the Colonel, anyway?"

Ronon fixed the last C4 in place and picked up his stun weapon. "We're done here," he grumbled and moved off before Hailey could get another word in.

Hailey followed with a big roll of her eyes, securing the remote detonator in her hands as she went into the dark reddish corridors. The Satedan had already reached the next T-section back the way they'd come and Hailey had to break into a run to catch up.

She barely registered movement in the corner of her eye as she crossed the T-section, but it was enough to react instinctively. She flung herself against the opposite wall and spun firing her P90 at the incoming stun shots. She wasn't hoping to hit anything, just to suppress the Wraith Drones long enough to get away. The Colonel had said silent kills, if possible. It was futile, though, as it wasn't long before her shoulder and arm went abruptly numb.

"Get down!" Ronon called out gruffly.

Hailey slumped to the floor in a wave of sudden tiredness. Blue and red flashes went back and forth in the air above her. Darkness crept into her eyesight and she gritted her teeth against the spreading numbness.

A low, alien-sounding klaxon went off.

* * *

"Shit," John cursed as the lights darkened and the klaxon broke through the silence. He got his radio out and hit the button. "Ronon, this is Sheppard. Come in."

No reply. John repeated the call three times, without success. " _Damnit_!"

"Go find them," Sam ordered, her eyes meeting his across the room. She'd picked up her P90 and held it securely in her arms. "I've got this covered."

John didn't like the idea of leaving her behind, even for a few minutes. He'd done it once before on Atlantis when Michael came for Torren, and she'd been shot and captured by the Wraith hybrids. Dark memories mixed with nostalgia invaded his thoughts. Like then, however, the look on Sam's face didn't brook any argument, so he got to his feet with a growl, pushing the images aside.

"Seal the door behind me," John said gruffly. "I'll be back in five."

"Be safe," Sam said, and the barest emotion in her eyes betrayed the hard lines of her face. He wasn't the only one with worries, but this wasn't the time or place for that.

Insides churning, John nodded curtly and left down the corridor, his P90 trained ahead of him. The klaxon made it impossible for him to hear any other sounds and so he watched the shifts of light for any signs of movement.

It gave him at least a second's warning.

From a chamber up ahead, two Wraith Drones stepped out with their stun spears raised. John pulled the trigger and trailed a burst of bullets across the first Drone's armour. It went down in spasms, twitching on the floor.

The second Drone fired off three stun shots and John dived for a protruding pillar in the wall. The shots soared above his head.

John abided his time, watching the shadow of the Drone coming closer on the wall. In a lull of stun fire, he rolled out and sent off a volley at the Drone's legs. The Wraith Drone slipped and John finished him off with five shots to the neck. Whitish fluids sprayed across the floor.

As silence fell over the corridor, John could hear the distant sound of Ronon's stun weapon. It couldn't be too far off. He quickly got to his feet and ran.

* * *

Ronon hugged the corner and counted to three. At three, he swung out and fired at the cluster of Wraith Drones down the corridor. "Now!"

"Grenade out!" Hailey shouted and lobbed the hand grenade down the corridor. The Drones recognised the tactic and threw themselves sideways, but it was too late. In a burst of smoke and fire, they crashed into the webbed walls.

Ronon didn't wait to see if they got up again. More would come. He turned and grabbed the woman under her arm. "Come on."

Hailey stumbled next to him, but held on with gritted teeth as he half-lifted, half-dragged her to the next junction. The shot to her torso had left one side of her body completely unresponsive. Not that it stopped her. The woman was a wild one.

"Here," Hailey said heavily, and Ronon eased her down in a small dent in the wall. She dug out the Ancient life signs detector and groaned. " _Damnit!_  We've got ten more bearing on us. Where do they  _come_ from?"

Ronon cocked his gun and peered down the corridor both ways. "Stasis pods."

" _Fuck_ ," Hailey muttered and thrust the Ancient device back into her large BDU pants pocket. "These things are—"

A tingle went up his spine and Ronon ducked out of the way just as a blue shot swerved close to his face. Adrenaline pumped through his veins. The feeling was exhilarating.

Ronon crouched low around the corner and took out two of the front Drones with two red shots straight to their chests. The Drones toppled over each other, their stun spears clattering to the floor. The remaining Drones took cover by the walls and Ronon sent off a couple of shots to keep them there.

"I'm outta grenades," Hailey called out behind him.

Ronon reared back as several shots went by. So their usual tactic was blown. Time to improvise. "Got one of those flash thingies?"

"It won't stop them," Hailey said, but still dug out a long device from her vest pocket and held it in her hand.

Ronon ignored the statement. "Be ready to move." He waited for the gap in fire, then rolled out and sent off a volley of deadly red bolts. It hit two more Drones across the chest and neck. They thrashed against the others, distracting them for only a moment. "Now!"

Hailey flung the flashbang grenade around the corner and Ronon turned away from the high-pitched whine and sharp light, eyes scrunched up until it passed. With no time for niceties, he picked up Hailey and heaved her over his shoulder.

" _Hey_!" she cried out and beat against his back with her good hand. "This isn't the stone age! I can  _walk_."

Ronon snorted, but didn't comment. Instead, he unfastened the backup M4 on his belt that Sheppard insisted he wear and handed it to her. "Watch my back."

"I'm not gonna be able to hit 'em from here," Hailey grumbled, but nevertheless seemed to calm down.

Fortunately, she didn't weigh much and Ronon could set a good pace. Every now and then, Hailey fired off a few shots behind them to slow the pursuers. Judging by the heavy stomps and Hailey's increased shots, the Wraith were still on their tail like annoying rats. Like she said, she wouldn't be able to hit any of them, but the suppression should give them some leeway.

"I'm outta ammo," Hailey said, with the familiar empty click of the M4 following her statement. Ronon looked back for just a moment and saw no pursuit.

The next thing he knew, something sharp jabbed into his stomach and he buckled. He fell to his knees with the additional weight, and quickly pushed Hailey to the side so he could be free. It wasn't quick enough. A swift blow to the head made him see stars.

"Ronon!"

Metallic blood tasted in his mouth. Ronon gritted his teeth and soared to his feet. He caught the Drone in chest and threw him into the webbed wall. White hair tangled in his hands as he took hold of its head and banged it twice against his knee. The stun spear dropped to the floor, but the Drone was resilient.

It punched Ronon in the side, a hard-fisted punch that made him grunt in pain. Then it caught hold of his arm and began to twist it sideways and down, intent on bringing him down. Ronon went with it, and hit the floor with a rolling motion to free himself.

The Drone was on him instantly. Its hands closed around his neck and lifted him with inhuman strength. Ronon's neck muscles clenched and he grabbed at the Wraith's fingers to pry them loose. When that proved useless, Ronon tucked his knees up and uncoiled into the Drone's chest, breaking the lock with his superior lower body strength. Ronon fell to the floor, gasping for air as the Drone recovered and lunged at him. He forced his burning muscles to act and spun around, kicking out the Drone's feet from the side, sending them both back to the ground.

The Drone wasn't fazed as it got a hold of his shirt and flung Ronon across the floor into the wall. He knew this engagement was taking too long but there was no other choice. Ronon reached into his hair, pulled out a knife, and with one swift motion flung it at the Drone as it got up. The blade stuck itself to the hilt in the Drone's chest, but it ignored the pain and lunged at Ronon again.

Ronon dove forward at it with a palm strike. The Drone countered by grabbing his arm and flinging him again down the hallway. He landed with a clatter, and realized that his gun was underneath his leg. The Drone charged forward with intent to crush Ronon and it was right on top of him when the familiar burst of P90 fire shot through the haze.

The Drone shook in place as it was perforated right in front of him. Ronon gathered his strength to kick the Drone away as he pulled his pistol from the ground to finish it off with single shot to the chest. He narrowed his eyes at the twitching, faceless Wraith on the floor before looking at Hailey. "You okay?"

Hailey nodded, then looked to the side for the cavalry. Sheppard ran up to them, grim-faced and worried. "Thank me later."

"Like hell," Ronon said, managing a smirk. "Woulda had him if you'd waited a second." He went to Hailey and picked her up again – this time under her arm so she could limp along – then fished the remote detonator out of his pocket. "Here, take this."

Sheppard kept his P90 trained on the corridor behind them, but accepted the detonator quickly. His voice sounded mildly offended. "Can't I ever save your ass without you getting pissed off?"

Ronon snorted and noticed Hailey grin beside him. "Nope."

* * *

"I need five more minutes," Sam insisted when the door opened to let them in. She moved quickly back towards the console and began to run her fingers across the connected tablet screen while Ronon put Hailey down by the door.

"We don't have five minutes," John stated, positioning himself by the door and peering back out at the corridor. "There's a shitload of trouble heading this way, Sam."

"Three minutes," Sam compromised, picking up the pace. Her eyes flitted quickly side-to-side as information scrolled down the tablet screen. "You move ahead. I'll catch up with you."

"Not happening," John growled. He turned back towards her, his eyes hard. "Three minutes and we go together."

Sam stopped and looked sideways at him, her eyes equally hard. John steeled himself, not about to take 'no' for an answer. He'd be damned if he left her behind to fend for herself again.

Silent words passed between them, and then...

"Alright," Sam said abruptly, her lips pursed. She looked at her watch and then at the screen again. "Two more minutes."

"Good."

John couldn't keep away the satisfied sense of victory as he looked back at the empty corridor. Standing on the other side of the door, Ronon observed him quietly. Some of the darkness in his eyes disappeared as if he pondered something. John merely raised an eyebrow in challenge and perked his ears.

He heard a set of heavy stomps come nearer. He switched off the safety on his P90. "Sounds like we've got company."

The Wraith Drones that'd followed them came around the corner down at the end of the corridor. John opened fire immediately in short bursts. The first Drone staggered and dropped to his knees, fluids flowing down its chest from John's bullet holes. The others moved swiftly around their dying comrade, taking cover in the small niches along the wall.

Ronon swung out of the doorway and fired off a couple of red killer shots. One of the Drones in the back who hadn't reached cover yet swerved into the wall head-first and didn't move again. Another Drone stepped over its body without falter, its weapon pointed at John.

John ducked underneath two blue stun blasts and hugged the wall inside the research chamber for a few moments, before swinging out to send off two more suppressive bursts. Ronon took the opportunity to land a red killer shot straight in the face of a Drone that peeked out of the niche it'd been hiding in.

"Eight more life signs closing in," Hailey called out amidst the  _thuds_  of stun blasts, eyes on the life signs detector in her hands.

"Almost there!" Sam began to pack up her stuff while the tablet finished the download. "Thirty seconds."

On a sudden thought, John fished out the remote detonator and threw it in her direction. "Here! Hold on to that. I'll run cover."

Sam caught it deftly and put it next to the tablet on the console. John leaned out of the doorway to fire off another set of bullets until the P90 clicked empty.

"Reloading!" John shouted above the klaxon and stun blasts. Ronon understood and leaned out to pin down the Drones. A third Wraith had joined the others on the floor by the time John cocked a new round into the chamber.

Crouching, John aimed for a fourth Drone when Sam finally called out, "Done!" and began to hurriedly unplug and pack up her remaining stuff.

"Ronon." John gestured to Hailey and Ronon picked her up again. As the others readied themselves, John stepped out into the corridor under a continuous burst of 5.7mm fire. "Let's go!"

Ronon fired off a red shot down the corridor and then moved off with Hailey, followed closely by Sam, who was adjusting her backpack. Sam slapped his shoulder as she passed and John sent off a final burst before following suit.

They ran hard, Ronon on point with Hailey limping beside him. The exit was close by, and Sam took a cover position next to it as Ronon, Hailey and John ran outside. Surrounded by thick undergrowth again, John heard her fire behind them and turned just in time to see her dive out of the door under a rain of blue stun blasts.

He half-turned to help her up, but Sam had spun in her fall, rolled over and was already on her feet, waving them on while sending off a last burst of suppression fire. "Get back to the stargate!"

She fished in her pockets and drew out a grenade.

John got the picture and ran after Ronon and Hailey, who'd already entered the forest. He glanced behind him to see Sam take cover behind a rock as several Wraith Drones appeared in the open doorway to the science outpost. They exploded before they could get out. John saw limbs fly across the small clearing. He turned to give Sam cover, but a blue shot hit dangerously close to his head and he was forced to continue. In his wake, he heard the familiar sound of the P90 tear expertly through the night.

The forest covered him quickly, and soon the sounds of gunfire died down. John made the others run ahead as he halted, his breath quick but steady. Adrenaline pumped in his ears as he listened. Twigs snapped and he swung on his feet towards it, weapon raised.

Sam ran out between two tree trunks, blue shots trailing the branches behind her. "Go!" she yelled, still sixty feet behind. John fired off a burst of 5.7mm bullets towards the origin of the shots before he began to backpedal down the path.

Whitish hair glowed in the darkness of the forest. John counted at least six of them as the Drones swept fluidly among the trees. Sam finally caught up to him and they broke into a flat run. The stargate wasn't far ahead, only about half a klick. They'd reach their trap soon.

John held Sam at an arms-length next to him, turning back every twenty feet to fire off a volley towards their pursuers. The Drones' blue stun shots soared around them, forcing them to run in zigzags down the path.

Up ahead, John noticed one of the marks he'd left behind and quickly found his radio. "Ronon! We're comin' in hot!"

Sam suddenly pushed him to the ground as a stun shot swept past his head. They got quickly to their feet, with John covering their rear as Sam went on. He was quickly running out of bullets. Within seconds, his weapon clicked forebodingly.

"I'm out!" John ran past her and Sam quickly followed suit. The stun shots were relentless at their feet.

"Get ready!" Sam yelled back and John saw Ronon's head pop up behind a rock. John's muscles burned, but he didn't care. Only ten metres, five, four, three, two—

They dived for the ground as Ronon pulled the triggers. The ground shook and dirt fell all over them. A ringing sound stuck in John's ears until the shakes had stopped and silence fell over them. Only when he opened his eyes did John realise he'd landed on top of Sam and was sheltering her head.

He rolled off awkwardly and sat up, glancing backwards to avoid her look. About forty feet away, what remained of six Drones lay scattered across the path and forest floor. John was surprised how close they'd been.

Finally, John looked at Sam, who'd sat up as well and was in the process of rolling her shoulder with a slight wince. Her breaths came in quick gulps, as if she was still unused to the physical strain. John's own pulse was already calming down.

"I thought we agreed: no heroics," John said, raising an eyebrow. Sam snorted between heavy breaths, then accepted his hand as John helped her up. He made sure she was in one piece before gesturing behind them. "Come on. Let's blow this thing and go home."

Sam found the remote detonator in one of her pockets and gave John a relieved grin. "Not exactly the Death Star, but what the heck."

She flicked the safety off on the detonator and pushed the button. The ground reverberated as great fireworks of yellow and red flames erupted above the treetops in the distance. John felt the low, rumbling shake and met Sam's eyes, smirking.

He could get used to this.

A cleared throat made John aware of Ronon and Hailey, who stood on the path ahead of them. What seemed like a smirk briefly touched the Satedan's lips, but when he met John's eyes it was gone as quickly as it'd come. He then turned and moved towards the stargate, silent as ever, and Hailey gave them a somewhat confused look before letting herself be half-carried away.

* * *

The blue shimmers of the event horizon broke through the darkness of the night, causing the gate room to dance with shadows. Up in the operations centre, Shen Xiaoyi crossed her arms and looked pointedly at the gate technician in charge. Li Shang ran his fingers across a keyboard and observed the screen in front of him. A beep sounded.

"It is Colonel Sheppard's recognition code, ma'am," Shang reported crisply and looked up at her with a strength in his eyes that Xiaoyi approved. It was sorely lacking these days, but it wouldn't be for long. She would make sure of that.

"Thank you," Shen said and moved towards the balcony overlooking the gate room. "Open the shields."

Laughter and smiles seemed to precede the two men exiting moments later through the stargate. Apparently, they had been to Tirana on the Tikwee's invitation. Or so they claimed.

"Colonel Sheppard," Shen called out. The man in question stopped abruptly and raised his head. Ronon eyed her as well, his smile gone.  _Was that a bruise on his face?_  Shen steeled herself. "Would you join me in my office?"

The two men glanced at each other silently, and Ronon seemed reluctant to leave. Still, they parted and Sheppard began to ascend the grand staircase. Shen turned and strode to the glass office, pausing by the wooden door.

"Please," she gestured him inside as Sheppard crossed the small catwalk from the operations centre. From behind the consoles, only Shang paid them any attention. The other gate technicians seemed to purposefully look away. Shen closed the door and went to stand behind her desk.

"How's Master Togar?" she asked, rearranging a few of the folders on her desk.

"Fine. Told me to say hi." Sheppard was nothing if not a closed book. Shen had to give him credit. Once he was in control of his emotions, he was a different player all together.

She smiled. "I hope to visit Tirana soon. I hear the Tikwee have been very pleased with our presence there."

"No complaints," Sheppard agreed. He pushed his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket. Shen followed the motion interestedly.

A moment of silence ticked by. Sheppard showed no signs of uneasiness.

Finally, Shen sat down and began to look at her laptop, ignoring the man on the other side of the desk. "Thank you, Colonel. That'll be all."

Sheppard nodded and prepared to leave without another word.

"One thing," Shen said sharply, halting him. She narrowed her eyes at him, holding his gaze locked with hers. "I do not like it when people try to go over my head.  _Remember_ that."

Sheppard's eyes darkened.

Shen smiled inwardly.

* * *

**_Approximately one year earlier..._ **

"With all due respect, General, I think it's a mistake." John stared defiantly at the wall-mounted screen, the operations centre dark and empty apart from McKay who operated the consoles.

Alone in his office on Earth, General O'Neill did not look impressed. In fact, his expression had grown sourer by the minute.  _"Look, Sheppard, I get it. You had a great commander. But the IOA—"_

"The IOA doesn't know anything about war," John insisted darkly, "And we're at war here, General. Even if Michael is gone, there are plenty of Wraith to go around. They want Atlantis. Sooner or later, they're gonna find us, and when that happens we need a commander who knows when to jink or punch out."

O'Neill threw his hands in the air. " _Sheppard—"_

"General," John interjected, pulling himself to his full height. "Colonel Carter knows more about what's out there than the IOA combined. We need someone with her knowledge and experience  _here_. Why else did you put her here in the first place?"

" _I'm not denyin' Carter's competence, Sheppard. God knows she could wind up a Joint Chief some day, but_ _the IOA's made its decision."_ And by the tone of it, it was final.

"Then appeal to the President," John said, feeling like he was coming to the end of his run. "I dunno, just do  _something._  The Colonel earned this command. It's hers."

O'Neill's expression softened and he observed John through the screen for a long time. " _I get your point, Sheppard, but don't court disaster. You're no good as a hangar queen."_

John scoffed darkly. He'd heard the stories about the General and his bouts with the IOA. It's why John appealed to him. That, and he'd been Carter's CO for a long time. "Ain't that where you come in, sir?"

O'Neill snorted.  _"Don't push it. I ain't got magic shoes."_ He heaved a deep and frustrated sigh, and looked at John.  _"Why're you doin' this?"_

"Because the Colonel deserves it," John said, a little warily. In truth, it was more than that, but it was as much as John could say. Carter – Sam's – place was here, in Atlantis. It just was.

O'Neill's look, however, made him very uncomfortable. He seemed to look straight through him, an ability he'd many times attributed to Sam. It was an unnerving sensation when done by her former CO and long-time friend.

" _I won't promise you_ _anything,"_ O'Neill said finally, and his tone was hard. The humour was gone from his eyes, but John didn't mind if O'Neill held true to his words.

"Thank you, General."

" _Don't thank me yet,"_ O'Neill grumbled.  _"This is gonna be a political nightmare. O'Neill out."_

The screen went black and soon the stargate shut down, casting the gate room in complete darkness until McKay turned on a few lights.

"So now what?" he asked uncertainly.

John turned to look at the inert stargate for a few moments, then glanced back at McKay. "Now we wait."

 _And_ _hope the bastards back down,_ he added silently, _or it won't be pretty._

 

* * *

  
****Ne** **xt:**  **"Righting the wrongs"

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The flashbacks in this chapter are meant to give some insight into how far John was willing to go for Sam - professionally - when she was ordered back to Earth at the start of season 5. The scenes might, however, be cut from this chapter and included in a potential prequel.
> 
>  
> 
> ***Air Force slang:
> 
> "jink" v: To maneuver an aircraft violently to avoid a threat.
> 
> "hit the deck" v: to prepare for action.
> 
> "punch out" v: To eject from an aircraft.
> 
> "hangar queen" n: An aircraft that spends more time in maintenance than it does flying.


	16. DAY 170, 196, 208

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a time to sew...flesh, blood, bones...and friendships.

****

* * *

**FIFTEEN | "Righting the wrongs."**

_Prompt: A time to sew_

* * *

**DAY 170**

" _What?_ "

"I'm assigning Major Dawkins to assist you with your duties," Xiaoyi repeated, her tone a little exasperated.

"I handle my  _duties_  just fine," John retorted, his arms crossed. He shot a sidelong glance towards where a green-clad, short man with the SGC patch on his shoulders stood at ease next to Xiaoyi's desk. "No offense, Major."

"None taken, sir," Michael Dawkins said, the corners of his lips edging upwards. His hair was slicked back and parted on one side. Not even an earthquake would be able to shake it loose. John resisted a wince every time he looked at him.

Xiaoyi leaned back in her chair and gestured to a folder on the desk. "Our situation's changed from a year ago, Colonel. You've stated it yourself. In addition to ensuring a high level of security on Atlantis and Tirana, you also have an increased number of weekly off-world missions requiring a specialised security detail to protect our people. Not to mention you've taken it on yourself to personally lead most of the training regimes, which, Major Dawkins has informed me, are quite extensive. I wonder if you ever have time to  _relax_?"

It had to be a joke. John shook his head and prepared to leave. "That's military life, Miss Xiaoyi. In a potentially hostile situation there isn't time for fun and games." he said. "As for my state, Major Lorne handles things when I'm gone, busy, golfing, or taking a whiz. You won't have to worry." He began to walk away.

"Colonel," Xiaoyi called out sharply, her good mood gone. Tilted, dark eyes glinted icily at him. "This assignment comes directly from Colonel Caldwell."

_Damn…_

With both Caldwell's and Xiaoyi's warnings a week ago, he had no choice. John forced himself to turn back, his eyes narrowed.

"Fine," he gritted out. He looked at Dawkins, who straightened on the spot. "You can report to my office tomorrow. Now if you'll  _excuse_  me, I've got some important stuff to take care of."

Without a backward glance, John stormed out of the office through the backdoor, his mind churning. After a brief glance at the watch, he keyed on his radio for a private channel while checking his six. "Sam. You still here?"

" _Yes,_ " Sam responded lowly in his earpiece. _"I'm about to head down below."_

Staring down the empty corridor in front of the transporter, John grimaced and lowered his voice. "Better scratch that and scramble. I'll drop by with the night shift and explain later."

* * *

"Would you believe it? I mean, the guy might as well be a  _politician._ He's certainly got that paper-pusher look," John said and threw a rock hard into the water for emphasis. When no reply came, he glanced over his shoulder.

On the log beneath the willow-like tree, Sam stared silently at the spot where his stone had landed. Ringlets drifted out from the epicentre. It fractured the half-moon reflected in the lake.

"Sam? You listening?"

It drew her out of whatever trance she'd fallen into. Sam's face contorted darkly. "Yes. I'm sorry. I've just got a lot on my mind." She took a deep breath and raised an eyebrow at him. "Did she actually say Dawkins's gonna replace Lorne?"

John frowned. "Not exactly. But from the looks of him, he'd hit the jackpot or something." He paused and eyed Sam suspiciously. "What's your point?"

"I'm not sure," she sighed and pinched the ridge of her nose. From the looks of it, she struggled with a headache. Maybe the failed smuggle attempt on Atlantis earlier weighed a bit too heavily. "Look, it might be Dawkins is just supposed to be an assistant of sorts. You  _do_ have a lot going on. Even so, it complicates things."

"Tell me about it." John snorted. "I'm getting paranoid looking over my shoulder all the time. He insisted on tailing me all day, even though I specifically said  _tomorrow._ "

Sam smirked. "We'll have to work out something else, but in the meantime you should probably cut back on off-world trips."

"I knew you'd say that," John groaned. He threw a second rock into the lake, hard and far out, then sighed. " _Fine_. Not like I'm gonna miss working with the Genii."

"Really? I thought you hit it off so well," Sam teased and got to her feet. "I especially liked the black eye you gave Radim's bodyguard."

John only grimaced at the memory. Due to some misunderstanding on his first trip to the Genii home world a few days ago, he'd ended up in a bundle with Radim's guards and fought back. Thanks to Sam, he'd avoided cell time, but only with the promise she'd punish him dearly. He'd never really lived down the crown of flowers the Tikwee teenage girls in the village had made him wear for a day. Ramirez had even cracked a joke and John threatened to put him to scrubbing the shower floor with a toothbrush next time the sergeant was on Atlantis.

"Look at it this way..." Sam smiled and stepped up to him. "You could use Dawkins to push for some free weekends now. I'm sure we could figure out something for you to do around here. Maybe even a visit to the Travelers?"

"That supposed to cheer me up?" John raised an eyebrow, but he half-smirked in return as they began to move off towards the Tikwee village for Sam's weekly dinner at Master Togar's. "Another people likely to kill me on sight."

"I'm sure they'll come around." Sam winked, the moon highlighting her grin. "Just show them that Sheppard charm."

* * *

**DAY 196**

"—and Ms Xiaoyi is expecting an answer. What should I tell her?"

John stopped half-stride and swung on his heel, a glare on his face. Dawkins nearly collided with him and jumped back to avoid it. John's tone was annoyed. "Tell her the same as last time and the time before that: I'll  _get_  to it when I'm  _back_."

"But, sir—"

John raised one finger warningly and then strode off down the corridor. It soon opened into the lower levels of the gate room. Sun streamed in through the windows behind the stargate, giving it an eerie glow.

Ronon was already there, along with Captain Matthews' day shift team. They were all dressed in standard security uniforms, with P90s strapped to their chests. In stark opposite, John had dressed more casually in jeans, combat boots and his leather jacket. An overnight bag was slung over his shoulder.

"Hi guys," John greeted them, and received nods and greetings in return. He turned to Ronon, who looked behind him with a slightly dark look. Exasperated, John swung around and gave Dawkins an expectant look. " _Yes_?"

Dawkins straightened his spine and puffed out his chest, barely giving the others a glance. "One of the IOA representatives was asked to join you. I was told to make sure you didn't leave him behind. Sir," he added, as if it was an afterthought.

"Who?" John's eyes narrowed and an uneasy feeling twisted his stomach. This wasn't exactly in their plans.

"He should be here any minute, sir," Dawkins said and looked back in the direction they'd come from. "Oh. There he is."

John stared behind Dawkins and was a little surprised to see Woolsey stride down the corridor at a brisk pace, briefcase in hand. He'd dressed in worn, green BDUs with no ID patches on. Quite different from the suits he usually wore. Was this an inspection?

"Colonel," Woolsey greeted as he came up next to them. He looked a little harried, but covered it quickly. "Major," he noted nearly coolly to Dawkins. "Please explain to Ms Xiaoyi that next time I'd appreciate a head warning."

"I will, sir," Dawkins nodded and finally excused himself from John's presence.

A sigh of relief escaped beneath John's breath. He glanced at Woolsey, who seemed a little preoccupied. Instead of the third degree, he decided to do it simple. "You ready?"

"As well as could be," Woolsey said, then remained silent while John called for the technician-on-duty – Shang was on today – to dial Tirana.

* * *

Bright sunlight made Sam squint as she stepped out of the Jumper.

"Ugh." Hailey winced beside her. She shielded her eyes with her spare hand. The other was clenched around the straps of a near bursting black bag. "I never get used to the climate on this planet."

Sam smirked and stopped to put on some sunglasses. "If you'd rather be drenched and cooped up in an underground storage facility for the rest of the week, you could've just stayed behind on M34-R6X."

Hailey wrinkled her nose. "With Genii scientists stinking like the wrong end of a skunk in heat? No thanks."

She shut the Jumper door with the handheld controller and flipped on the invisibility. Seemingly alone in the forest clearing, they turned to a narrow path barely visible in the undergrowth and moved off.

"Personal hygiene aside," Sam said, taking the lead down the crooked path, "I was very impressed with what they had accomplished so far."

"Yes, the radiation suits were a nice touch," Hailey grumbled. The large bag in her hand caught on a branch and she struggled a little to release it.

"Safety precautions," Sam reminded her, amused. "It's more than they had the last time they experimented with nuclear power. At least they've turned their experiments towards a long-term societal benefit."

"So you really think this nuclear reactor will be able to power an entire underground city? They  _did_ struggle with that toaster-looking thing."

"It'll probably be a while and they've asked for our help… but yes, I think they'll work it out one day. In the meantime, we've got what we asked for."

" _Some_ of what we asked for," Hailey corrected.

The forest thinned and the sunlight became brighter again. Soon the forest ended and a vast field of grass opened up before them next to the big lake gathered at the bottom of the mountains. It was a short walk to the mine camp from here, following the shore of the lake until they passed the AA railgun close to the log cabins.

"Y'know, ma'am," Hailey said as they trailed past the lake, "we're not gonna get a lot of the stuff we need from the Coalition. They're helpful, sure, but  _way_  behind us technologically."

Sam held back a sigh. The question wasn't really  _where_ to get the things they needed. It was  _how._

"Maybe we could sneak in with a Jumper, pinch the stuff, and sneak out before the old bat noticed," Hailey suggested. "It's a big city."

"Every Jumper's got homing devices," Sam reasoned. "Even when invisible, Atlantis' sensors would pick us up from miles away. Should we by any chance get in undetected, knock out our own people, and escape with the items in hand, people would notice they're missing and ask questions. We can't afford that."

"So…what's your plan?" Hailey asked as they came around the lake and left the fields of grass behind. They greeted the guys on guard duty by the AA railgun, and Hailey hurried up to match Sam step by step.

"I'm working on it," Sam said, resigned.

Past the AA gun they entered into the mine camp – a clutter of wooden cabins and a few cabins currently under construction by Earthborns and contracted Tikwee builders. The mountains rose up sharply above them.

Sam saw a lot of activity by the mineshaft opening and steered Hailey towards her cabin instead. Once it came into view, she grinned.

At the porch of her cabin John sat fiddling with his golf ball. Dressed in his leather jacket and aviator sunglasses, with a slight smirk on his lips, he looked like a stereotypical flyboy. A flyboy far away from home, that is.

"You're kinda late," John said. He got up from the ground and sauntered towards them with his hands in his pockets. Sam felt the distinct urge to hug him, like so many other times lately, but she repressed it.

"A lady's only fashionably late, sir," Hailey said quickly, grinning. She switched the bag into her other hand and gave him a brief salute. John returned it a little awkwardly. He'd never been much for formality.

"Our friends kept us a little longer," Sam said amusedly. "You ready for some vacation?"

"As long as it doesn't involve being tied to a chair this time, yeah." John grimaced and shuddered.

Sam stifled a grin. Before Asuras, John had come clean about his previous…entanglements with Larrin and the Travelers. Not something he remembered fondly. From her own experiences with the woman in question, Sam understood. The almost Amazonian qualities Larrin possessed were probably a bit over the top for someone like John. Still, her reconnection with the Travelers in the past month had only strengthened Sam's sense of humour when it came to his earlier predicament. She patted his arm. "I'll tell Larrin to be gentle."

Though John's eyes were invisible behind the aviator sunglasses, she felt the surge of emotion in them. Suddenly a little awkward, Sam glanced at Hailey and gestured to the bag. "Put the stuff inside. I'll take it to the cave later."

"Yes, ma'am." Hailey nodded, smirking. Whatever she'd read into their subtext, Sam hoped she wouldn't hear about it. The woman was too frank sometimes, like an annoying little sister. "I'm gonna grab some chow, then I'll sneak in and get some work done on that power relay. See ya."

With no further ado, the captain went to Sam's cabin and strode inside. Sam turned back to John with a smile. "So…"

"Before we start anything, there's someone else here for you," John said. "He's off on the grand tour with one of those botanists Xiaoyi sent here last month. The sour one, uh…Michelle?"

Just by the tone of his voice, Sam recognised which woman in particular John talked about. She'd apparently given him some grief back on Atlantis before being sent here. Sam frowned. "Who's the visitor?"

"Don't get too excited," John warned and gestured towards a couple strolling close to the mineshaft. "Seems like Xiaoyi sent him."

As the couple came into clearer view, Sam's neck tensed slightly. "Woolsey? What's  _he_ doing here?"

"Apparently he's the new civilian oversight on Tirana," John said, a little grimly. "Permanent assignment. Xiaoyi gave him the news today."

* * *

Seated on the only chair in Sam's cabin, Woolsey accepted the wooden cup of hot local tea Sam offered him. John declined the cup in her other hand, so Sam kept it for herself and sipped it carefully.

After a moment and a deep breath, Woolsey spoke. "Just to have it on the record, Colonel, I'm not here to take over your job. This is your turf, not mine. I'm just here to observe."

Sam gave him a smile, but felt her neck tense all the same. "You might've been sent on a fool's errand, then. There's not much to see, really. We mine, hang out with the locals, go on the occasional sweep of the planet. It's all in my reports."

"Yes." Woolsey nodded and a shadow crossed his face briefly. His hand tightened a little around the cup of tea. "Still, Ms Xiaoyi feels that my services will best serve our needs here. If there's anything you'd like an input on for instance… I'm available." He ended on that note and Sam nodded in some kind of thanks.

For several moments, neither of the people in Sam's sunlit cabin said anything. John, who leaned against the wall by the fireplace, eyed both of them narrowly. Eventually, he addressed Woolsey, who seemed lost in his own little world.

"If you don't mind me asking…" John shared a glance with Sam before continuing. "What'd you do?"

Instead of the stereotypical politician's affronted look that there might be a second agenda hiding in the background, Woolsey's eyes hardened behind his glasses. He gripped the cup tighter and met each of their stares.

"I played the Devil's advocate, Colonel," he said. "A necessary evil in any decent administration but not always wanted."

Sam could relate to it all too well. A touch of sympathy went through her, but her spine remained tense and on guard. After all, Woolsey had remained silent when Xiaoyi and Coolidge booted her off Atlantis. That display of inaction still stung.

But now he was here, and by the sound of it he wasn't about to leave anytime soon. Just like her.

With a tight smile, Sam raised her cup towards Woolsey. "Welcome to Tirana then, Richard."

* * *

"I don't like it," John said later as they entered the mines after nightfall.

"Me neither," Sam muttered lowly. She checked behind them to make sure no one had seen them enter, then led John down a dark passageway away from the main mining caves. After a sharp bend, she switched on a flashlight in one hand. In the other she carried the bag they'd gotten from the Genii, which Hailey had stored in Sam's cabin while the mining went on.

"Xiaoyi's up to something. Remember what McKay said?"

Sam made a face. "That she's asked for full access to the Atlantis and SGC database on her personal computer. I remember."

And it worried her a little. If Xiaoyi was on the search for something specific, the implications were that she knew or at least suspected something…

"Apparently, she's gonna review all of the departments," John mumbled tersely behind her. "Take stock, whatever. Dawkins's been pestering me about some efficiency report all week. I'll bet you anything Woolsey's here to do the same."

After several new bends and climbs over huge boulders, Sam turned and went towards a narrow fissure in the wall. She gestured for John to wedge through, her lips pursed in a sharp frown in the flashlight.

"Maybe," Sam said, handing him the bag and then following him. Once through, she turned and began to heave a large rock in front of the opening. John helped her to get it in place. "We can't do anything about it now," she finished as they moved onwards. "Besides…I'm not sure whether Woolsey's truly on her side or not."

"He's with the IOA at least," John said with a growl, walking in step with her. "Been hanging around them ever since they got here in force."

"But he worked as my liaison before Xiaoyi made her coup," Sam reminded him. They descended down a narrow passageway full of sharp rocks, and eventually began to see light at the end of the tunnel. "I got to know him a little. And he helped us out with the Coalition inquisition last year."

"So you're gonna include him in our plans?" John asked sharply.

"Of course not," Sam retorted, halting. In the light of the flashlight, John's grim features were sharp and contrasted. "He's not a bad man, but that doesn't mean I trust him. Not completely."

"Good." John nodded and some of the hardness in his face softened. "I don't want you banished to  _another_ distant planet if Xiaoyi discovered what you were really up to here."

It made Sam smile. She put her hand on his arm gratefully. "Thanks, John." With a nod behind her, she said, "You ready for the big surprise?"

John glanced at her hand and smirked, his eyes playful in the dimness. "Always."

* * *

"Asgard shield emitters. Naquadria generators. You didn't get this off Atlantis," John said, both amazed and suspicious, as he walked around the brightly lit cave.

Getting up from under the large, engine-looking mixture of various parts, Sam wiped her hands on a piece of cloth and met John's eyes. "Earth."

She knew it'd shock him. John's eyes widened. "You're kidding."

" _Daedalus_ beamed it up from the SGC before…well, before." She stopped herself from saying too much. Technically, John was still below the paygrade. Not that this had been Homeworld Command's intended use of the equipment they'd sent, but Sam had been forced to improvise. The present circumstances took priority.

"I didn't see any of this reported in their supplies," John said as he lifted a hand-sized device from a rudimentary workbench and turned it over.

"I erased it from the records," Sam admitted. She shut a few open panels on the engine-like machine that revealed a myriad of transparent wires taken from a broken Jumper. "I didn't want the IOA to ask questions."

John put the device down and ran his hand along the Asgard shield emitter next to it. "Is it gonna work?"

With her eyes on the large, odd-shaped device in the middle of the room, Sam sighed. "Hopefully. Once I get all the parts I need it shouldn't take too long to assemble. Hailey's helping me out."

"How long?"

"Months maybe. Weeks." Sam shrugged. "It all depends on when I get the parts. Right now I'm short on wires, plugs and all the little bolts and pieces that's gonna hold this thing together. There's also the matter of getting some kind of thrusters. At least eight of them. Speaking of which…when you get back to Atlantis, I need you to do something." She bit her lip hesitantly.

John grimaced. "I'm not gonna like this, am I?"

Sam only smirked and wrung off her engineer overalls to reveal black pants and a tank top. As she pulled on her BDU jacket, she turned to wink at him. "After a day with Larrin, you might."

* * *

The stargate shut down and Sam stared at it for a few moments before turning to Captain Matthews, who was positioned by the DHD. "Dial Atlantis."

"Yes, ma'am," Matthews responded quickly and began to punch the buttons on the DHD. The stargate slowly began to hum with energy as the chevrons lit up in a specific order.

"Into the belly of the beast, ma'am?" Hailey muttered bravely next to Sam. They'd both dressed somewhat casually in simple BDUs, as if nothing was out of the ordinary on their weekly visit to Atlantis. Several steps behind them, the containers of food supplies and raw materials were stacked beside a number of scientists and grunt workers.

"Stay frosty," Sam said lowly, straightening her spine as the blue vortex burst out from the stargate and eventually settled into a stable event horizon. "This is just a supply run."

"Right." Hailey snorted, but silenced immediately at Sam's reproachful look.

Among the people coming back with them were a number of Xiaoyi's suggested personnel, who too often seemed to stare at them one times too many. Just as Sam had suspected, trust was an issue. There might even be some among the Tikwee colonists who reported to Xiaoyi for extra favours. Politicians had a knack for finding eyes and ears in high and low places.

Sam dug out her radio and keyed her recognition code on a GDO. "Atlantis, this is Colonel Carter on Tirana. We request permission to come through."

" _Colonel Carter, this is Atlantis. The shield's down. Nice to see you again."_ Chuck's voice made Sam smile. Most of the time he'd been replaced by a technician called Shang, so this was something familiar.

"Alright, people." Sam turned and called out to the crowd, "Let's move out." She stooped down and picked up a crate along with Hailey, and then led the way into the blue event horizon.

After a familiar tingle and the feeling of being instantly frozen and defrosted, they exited into the sunny, warm Atlantis gate room. At the end of the raised platform, Caldwell stood at ease, hands behind his back. He'd dressed in base uniform – a blue sweater over navy pants and light blue shirt. The Atlantis patches were on his shoulders again.

"Welcome back, Colonel," Caldwell greeted her and Sam sent Hailey a significant look. They put the crate down next to the platform, then Hailey stepped back and guided the incoming containers into proper stacks.

Sam stepped up to Caldwell, her insides cool. "Colonel," she said respectfully. "How're the repairs going?"

"Slowly," Caldwell said lowly. "We'll probably be planetside for another fortnight. I'm sure McKay could use some extra hands." He eyed Sam and the rest of her group almost mournfully.

Sam smiled a little. Even though their first-hand reports and off-world informants said the Wraith had been embroiled in their own civil war for the past month, there was nothing a pilot loathed more than being chained to the ground. Caldwell was no different.

"Maybe I could spare a few if it'll speed things along," Sam offered. "At least  _Daedalus_ will be at 100 % capacity when this is done."

"110 % according to McKay," Caldwell deadpanned, clearly not as optimistic. "But I'd rather have her up in the air at 90 % than spend extra time on the remaining 10."

Sam agreed it would perhaps make her feel safer, but without these repairs and upgrades to her shields and weapons,  _Daedalus_ would just end up like she'd done last time if they came to a head with the Wraith superhive. At this critical juncture, they couldn't afford that.

"How's everything on Tirana?" Caldwell asked once he'd finished grumbling about McKay and repairs. "I understand Sheppard went to visit yesterday."

"Yes," Sam said, wary of any eavesdroppers. "He's off to the Athosians now." The lie rolled carefully over her lips and although Caldwell knew the truth of it – that New Athos was just a waypoint for the Traveler rendezvous point – she hoped anyone who eavesdropped believed it. "Should be back sometime tonight or tomorrow."

"Well, I'm sure he's having a blast." Caldwell smirked tightly, and then looked around the gate room.

The stargate had shut down and some of Sam's people had moved on with the crates, helped by Atlantis personnel. Hailey stood by the crate she and Sam had carried with them, appearing to be bored out of her mind.

"While you're here," Caldwell said, a little loudly for the benefit of the eavesdroppers, "I suggest you pop by the office later. Seems we've got some efficiency reports regarding the Atlantis military to go over." He then lowered his voice and stepped closer to Sam. "Dawkins handed them in to Xiaoyi two hours ago."

Sam's insides twisted. John was supposed to do them once he got back – he'd told her so himself. Had Dawkins gone behind his back?

"I'll see you later," Caldwell said in a normal voice again, then turned and left without another word.

Sam looked over her shoulder at Hailey and the woman's idleness was replaced by sharp attention. With a minute gesture, Sam asked her to carry on and Hailey disappeared in direction of the transporter.

With a sigh, Sam glanced up at the glass office above the platform and startled to see Coolidge glare fiercely down at her. Xiaoyi stood next to him, her eyes indecipherable. After a moment's pause, the Chinese woman turned and went to sit behind her desk.

Coolidge's eyes followed Sam as she ascended the grand staircase.

_Time to play._

* * *

A stream of people were going in and out of the supply room door, carrying with them an assortment of items under the supervision of Dr Rodney McKay. The man scrutinised each item that was taken out, making a sort of huffed sound as he crossed them off on his tablet computer.

"What do you think you're doing?" McKay snapped at a skinny gangly man in SGC uniform who exited with a small, unmarked box. He wrenched the box from the man and turned it upside-down according to the direction of the arrow painted on the box, then thrust it back at the skinny fellow. "You wanna get us all killed? Seriously. I'm surrounded by idiots."

McKay swung around, muttering under his breath, and narrowed his eyes at the next person in the line, a woman in Atlantis uniform.

Hailey stifled a smirk and straightened her spine. With deliberate steps, she walked up to the supply room door. "Hiya, doc."

"Huh?" McKay looked up from his tablet. His frustrated expression curdled into a grimace. "Oh. It's you. Mini-Sam."

"Nice to see you too, McSnarky." Hailey couldn't help her grin. "Having fun?"

"A blast," McKay scowled. He glanced at the woman in the Atlantis uniform, who still stood by the door with a large metallic object in her arms. "What're you waiting for? Get that up to Zelenka." He groaned when the woman finally left, then frowned at Hailey. "What're  _you_  doing here?"

Hailey fished out a piece of paper from her pants pocket and handed it to him. "Picking up some stuff for  _Daedalus_. Colonel Caldwell wanted it ASAP."

McKay read over the paper and he mumbled the text in a rapid tone. "—bla, bla, bla…power converters. Fine," he said aloud to Hailey and immersed himself in his tablet again. "They're in the back. Aisle 15D. Try not to get yourself lost this time."

"I've got a map," Hailey deadpanned, to which McKay only rolled his eyes. However, with his permission she went through the door.

The supply room was one of many, but this was the largest of them – if you didn't count the drone storage. The room was spacious but filled from floor to ceiling with metallic shelves brought from Earth years ago. Hailey noted some of the shelves were emptier than last time, even as others had filled up with refined items and plating from the recently established Atlantis forge.

A few people milled about the brightly lit room, but none seemed to take any notice of her. That served her perfectly. Even so, Hailey appeared to be really interested in locating aisle 15D, when what she  _really_ wanted to find was aisle 12A.

Aisle 12A turned up faster than she'd expected. With a discreet look around, Hailey veered off and hid somewhat behind a large container. She dug out a small transmitter from a jacket pocket, then swept her eyes across the many shelves.

The item she looked for was fortunately on a low shelf. Hailey grinned and made another look around – no one were looking – before attaching the transmitter to it. She pushed the power button on the transmitter and it began to blink.

Keeping her eyes on her surroundings, Hailey found her radio and turned it on the pre-decided channel. She clicked the radio thrice in quick succession. Her neck tensed as she waited for the reply. It took five seconds, then her earpiece resounded with two affirmative short clicks.

Relief filled her belly, but she held back a smile. She glanced again around the room. She was rather secluded here and no one would be able to see anything. In fact, it seemed the room was empty save her. The coast was clear. Hailey tapped her radio four times and waited.

Within moments the large, bulky item to which she'd attached the transmitter disappeared in a ray of light.

Satisfied, Hailey snuck out of aisle 12A and continued calmly towards aisle 15D.

"Hey!" McKay called out behind her. He stood in the doorway, tablet in hand, with a really annoyed look on his face. "I've got important things to do, you know."

"Just a sec," Hailey called back and hurried down aisle 15D. She quickly found the required box of spare power converters and then strode back towards the exit.

"Finally!" McKay practically tapped his foot when she exited. He turned to the door controls and connected his tablet to it. In rapid movements, he input a 17-digit password and the door sealed. Hailey hid her smirk.

"By the way, sir, Colonel Carter asked me to give you this." Balancing the box in one hand, Hailey handed him a flashdrive from her pants pocket.

"What's this?" McKay frowned and turned it over.

"Specs and suggestions for upgrades on Atlantis. Something about the shields in particular, I think." Hailey shrugged. "She said you'd understand."

"Of course I will." McKay rolled his eyes and huffed. "I'm the smartest man in two galaxies."

* * *

Turning a corner in the familiar corridor, Sam reached the door to John's office – in which Caldwell had temporarily taken up residence while on base – and waved her hand above the controls. The door rolled open and revealed a brightly lit room.

Caldwell sat behind John's desk, papers and folders surrounding him, albeit tidier than if it'd been John's clutter. He looked up as she entered and sealed the door automatically behind her.

"That was quick," he noted and put down one of the files in his hand.

Sam shrugged. "Surprised me too. Apparently, I check out. Someone must've sent them some good reports."

"Good. Let's hope that keeps them off the scent," Caldwell said and cleared space on the desktop for her tablet computer. "Now, tell me where we're at."

In one swift motion, Sam set down the tablet computer and inserted a flashdrive. The screen lit up and demanded a password. Sam cracked the encryption and drew up a revised galaxy map. She zoomed in on a particular area and several planetary systems popped up, along with red dots to identify the latest locations of known Wraith vessels, planets or outposts.

"According to my initial talks with the Travelers, none of the Wraith factions have discovered the supply colonies they established after the Attero device destroyed their main colony," Sam said. "They put their fleet on alert months ago when reports of the Wraith superhive began to circulate, but they've got no real weaponry to withstand it. Evasion's been their primary tactic, but they've still got people who want to live planetside – particularly younger generations – so that's only half effective. They don't want to split their people, so discussions have begun about ordering everyone to live on their ships full-time."

"It's worked for them before," Caldwell said, his gaze thoughtful. He leaned closer and stapled his fingers together. "What's the status of their ships?"

"It varies," Sam said with a grimace and leaned against the desktop. "Most of them aren't equipped for a fight with the Wraith, let alone a superhive. Their strongest bet is the Ancient Aurora-class ship they acquired years ago." It'd fortunately been off on a mission when the Attero device activated.

" _Our_ strongest bet too," said Caldwell, his tone grim. "Even with upgrades and your little project as back-up,  _Daedalus_ would only be able to hold off the superhive for a while. We wouldn't be able to destroy it unless from within, but that—"

"—is a suicide mission," finished Sam. She met Caldwell's eyes, equally grim. "We're not there yet."

Caldwell nodded in agreement, and then broke the tense moment by gesturing to the tablet screen. "So what did the Travelers think of our plan?"

"Larrin seemed open to the idea of joining forces, but the Traveler Council was a bit more reserved." Sam sighed and crossed her arms. "I'm hoping John's gonna have better luck in the negotiations."

"Mhm," Caldwell hummed. He glanced at the tablet screen, his brows furrowed. "What about the Genii? Did they agree to our terms?"

Sam resisted a deep moan. "Got some details to work out still, but if we provide the minerals and scientific input on their nuclear project, they'll open up their refineries and factories for us. Should help out in the event we need extra materials we can't get out of Atlantis. I'm nowhere on the thrusters, though," she added resignedly.

"I've got a broken F-302 in the hangar bay," Caldwell suggested. "We've cannibalised it for spare parts."

"I'll keep that in mind." Sam smiled. She looked back at the tablet screen and pulled up another map. "As for Wraith movements, nothing's changed since we did a new download of their network two weeks ago. The only thing I've confirmed through our informant network is that the Wraith factions are still at each other's throats and it doesn't look like they'll stop anytime soon."

"Todd's faction?" Caldwell asked darkly, looking at a large red dot on the screen that signified the Wraith superhive. A small fleet of normal Hive ships and cruisers surrounded it. It would seem that even among the Wraith, people flocked around the strong.

"They've got the upper hand," Sam said, her insides twisting. "The other factions seem to put up a good fight, however. No signs of a cease-fire yet."

"Small favours, I guess." Caldwell sighed and leaned back in John's office chair. "But that's just one side of the matter. Atlantis' sensors picked up the superhive at one of our old trading allies three days ago. Xiaoyi wouldn't let me send anyone in until yesterday. Reports say the villages were leveled. No survivors. Same as before."

Sam's lips thinned. Ire rose in her, but she kept it back. The injustice of it all rankled her, and reminded her that little kids like Reika might never make it in this galaxy if vampiric creatures were allowed to determine the rules of the game. The casual way the superhive seemed to dispose of whole human colonies without even culling them, and the IOA's calm acceptance of the fact… It was despicable and it spoke of some higher agenda that Sam had yet to figure out.

"We're gonna win this," Sam stated, her tone hard. "I'm not having another Earth happen again, nor am I gonna leave Pegasus to its fate." She paused, then added lowly, "I'll do whatever it takes."

Caldwell stared at her steadily for several moments, his expression thoughtful. "How's your project coming together?"

Sam smirked as a blast from her past coined her phrase. "Like a big, honking space gun."

* * *

"Everything okay?" Sam asked with a smile as Hailey stepped up to her side. Behind her, a couple of jumpsuit-clad airmen from the  _Daedalus_ carried a container to the edge of the platform.

"Thanks, guys." Hailey nodded at the two airmen, who made a few salutes to the two women before leaving the gate room. She turned to Sam and said, "You could say that, ma'am."

"Good." Sam smirked, then straightened and looked up at the operations centre. She clicked on her radio. "We're ready down here, Chuck."

" _Dialling Tirana, ma'am,"_  Chuck responded quickly. The stargate hummed with energy and swept into motion.

As they waited, Sam glanced up at the glass office. Xiaoyi and Coolidge stood inside, deep in conversation, but their eyes occasionally glanced in their direction. Slanted, icy eyes met Sam's and Sam nodded calmly in acknowledgment. Xiaoyi continued her conversation with the barest of nods to indicate that she'd seen her.

Sam was tempted to roll her eyes, but turned back to Hailey instead. "Hope you got familiar with the  _Daedalus_. You'll be working there a few days a week for the next fortnight."

Hailey made a face. "I've got to work with McSnarky?"

"Think of it as an opportunity," Sam said lowly but amused. There was no doubt what the tone of her voice suggested.

"Yes, ma'am." Hailey nodded, a little more serious.

The stargate burst into life. Once the event horizon stabilised, Sam and Hailey picked up the container from  _Daedalus,_ and then led the group back to Tirana.

Matthews' security team expected them on the other side, weapons raised. When they spotted Sam, however, they lowered them and Matthews moved forward to greet them.

"Welcome home, ma'am," the captain saluted her, the other hand secure on the P90 attached to her TAC vest. As people passed them, she bent a little closer and muttered, "Message from the Lt Colonel. He'll be back tonight."

Sam glanced around automatically to make sure none of those she suspected of reporting back to Xiaoyi had heard. She nodded and said, "Tell him I'll be in my cabin."

"Will do, Colonel." Matthews straightened and returned to her position at Sam's dismissal.

"You think he succeeded?" Hailey muttered as they followed the rest of the group on the way back to the Tikwee village and the mine camp. The container was a bit heavy in their hands, but neither complained. Not when the content was vital to their project deep in the mountain.

"I hope so." Sam sighed. "We really need them if we're gonna have any shot at taking the superhive down."

Hailey hummed in agreement and the two fell silent for a moment as the trees began to thin out. The familiar fields opened up beyond the forest and they could see the roofs of the Tikwee houses in the distance. Smoke rose up from the chimneys. A waft of hot, spicy food drifted on the wind.

Once they neared the village, Hailey tensed up beside Sam. "Ma'am."

Sam stared in the direction Hailey pointed out and her insides twisted as she spotted Woolsey in company with Togar and some of the other Tikwee colony council members. They strolled down the main street of the village, with Togar obviously gesturing to some of the booths and stalls they passed. Woolsey wore a courteous smile as he listened.

"Emerson," Sam called out to an Airman in her group, one of the guys John had told her she could trust. The young man turned and approached them. "Help Captain Hailey with this container. Get it to the mines." She didn't need to tell them it had to be done discreetly.

"Yes, ma'am." Emerson saluted and took the container off Sam's hands. Hailey gestured for him to follow, with only a fleeting glance at Sam, and then they were off.

Sam turned towards the main street as the rest of the group veered off towards the mine camp. Steeling herself, she walked up the street.

Togar spotted her first, a wide smile on his lips. "Ah, Colonel. It is good to see you." The familiar grey hair, the laughing wrinkles, and his deep baritone voice only calmed Sam a little.

"Good to see you too, Master Togar." Sam smiled somewhat tensely, and hoped it wasn't obvious. "I see you've met Mr Woolsey already."

"Yes, indeed," said Togar, giving the balding BDU-clad man a second look. "He came here this morning, said he wanted to get to know us better."

Sam eyed Woolsey, who seemed a little ill at ease under her scrutiny. However, he met her eyes as he said, "I explained to Master Togar that I'm to stay for an indefinite time and thought I might as well present myself."

"Very courteous," Togar said approvingly. "Said many good things about you, Colonel." He winked at her and turned back to Woolsey. "I've certainly enjoyed our talks today, Mr Woolsey. I trust you'll share a meal with us tonight?"

"Thank you for the invitation," said Woolsey. "I'd be happy to. There're still many things about your culture I'd like to know more about. This harvest ceremony, for example… It seems quite unique."

"Yes, yes." Togar chuckled. "So the Colonel told me. To us, though, it's nothing more than what we've done for generations."

The two men continued their talk about harvest ceremonies and how it could be related to other types of ceremonies Woolsey had read about in the Milky Way and Pegasus. Meanwhile, Sam nodded at the appropriate places and came with a few inputs. Her mind, however, was elsewhere, while her eyes stayed on Woolsey.

From the NID to the IOA, the man had somehow earned General O'Neill's trust enough to the point that Jack had actually asked him for input on how to deal with the IOA. Or so Daniel had told her last year after Woolsey was called in to help them out with the Coalition's Inquisition. Apparently, he'd been a key player in getting Sam back on Atlantis after the IOA had removed her, despite the fact that he'd been her chosen successor.

Sam had chosen him as her civilian advisor for that very reason when the IOA made their push for more influence several months ago. She hadn't trusted Coolidge or Xiaoyi then, and she still didn't. But Woolsey…he'd shown himself on occasion to be a man of principles.

Was that why he'd sought out the Tikwee colonists, to  _truly_ learn more about them and possibly earn their friendship? She knew he wasn't like Xiaoyi, but more times than not since Xiaoyi took power, he'd never acknowledged an opinion different than hers. Not publicly, nor privately. And there was the matter of his obvious inaction after the attack on Kadara…

Sam held back a sigh. It'd take more than this recent turn of events to earn her trust again, but if he stayed true to the man O'Neill had once entrusted with her career… He'd have potential.

"And when will we be joined by Colonel Sheppard?" Togar turned to her, the question snapping Sam out of her reverie. Woolsey observed her too, his eyes indecipherable.

"Um, tonight, I hope." Sam smiled, and crossed her fingers behind her back. "He's visiting an old friend off-world at the moment."

* * *

"You owe me big," John groaned as soon as the door to her cabin closed behind him. He looked a little worse for wear with ruffled and dirty BDUs, and as he crossed the floor to Sam's bunk – the only other seat available – he limped obviously. He sank into the bunk with a sigh.

"I take it things went well." Sam smirked and turned in her wooden chair. With one hand she reached out and turned the knob on the oil lamp set on her desk. A soft, warm glow lit up the cabin.

"Kinda. Larrin says hi," said John with his eyes closed, his head leaned back against the wall. It seemed like he'd gone through a warzone…or maybe Larrin's quarters if the woman's suggestive grin at their last meeting held any meaning. That particular thought made Sam's neck tense a little.

After a deep breath, John looked at her, his tone serious. "We'll get to borrow it, but it needs fixing."

He fished out a folded pieced of paper and held it up. Sam got to her feet and crossed the room to snatch it from his hand. Then she read it over and whistled. "What'd they  _do_ to it?"

"Reversed it into a Hive ship. Apparently the Wraith got into action with one of their Generation ships a while back." John smirked, his eyes dancing in the light from the oil lamp. "I'm betting  _that's_ a night they'd like to forget."

Sam grinned and put the paper away in her pocket. "Thanks, John. This is really great news."

"Sure." He shifted in his seat and winced slightly. Whatever Larrin had done to him, Sam could only guess it had to involve some roughhousing. A fact that she realised bothered her more than a little.

"She must've been real happy to see you," Sam said, her grin gone. Her insides coiled uneasily.

"Not sure about 'happy'," John mumbled, shifting in his seat so he was turned towards her. "More like 'cracked' and 'sadistic'. Chucked me into an airlock when I got there and kept me locked-up for two hours before she'd even talk to me. Seemed a bit pissed, to be honest."

Sam raised an eyebrow. In her meetings with Larrin so far, there'd been no mention of their previous alliance's bad points, like Asuras or the Attero device last year. So if Larrin was angry about something… "What'd you do?"

"Didn't call," John deadpanned, "or something like that. Said we took ages to get back in touch after we jumped planets six months ago."

"Oh." Sam didn't know what else to say. No wrath like a woman scorned?

"Managed to explain to her eventually why we've been off the grid, and she let me out. Seemed happy after that. Personally, I think she just liked to see me sweat." John grimaced and rolled his shoulders. Something  _popped_ and a sigh of relief came past his lips. He opened his eyes fully and met hers. "Don't send me back there."

This time, Sam's smirk returned. There was something reassuring about the tone in John's voice and the emotion in his eyes. "No promises. You  _did_ get results."

"You're mean," said John grouchily and slumped back against the wall. His annoyance, however, seemed short-lived. After a moment, he looked up at her. "So what's your sitrep?"

"Reports." Sam gestured to the pile of papers on her desk, next to several small metallic objects she'd tried to fix for her project in the mountains. "New demands from the power that be. You were right about the efficiency reports."

"Lucky guess," John said, then raised a finger in her direction. "You should take weekends off too, y'know."

"Probably," Sam said, but held back a sigh. "It's almost like my old job, except the environment's different. Got a nice view, though." She nodded towards the window above her desk. When the curtains were pulled aside, she had a nice view of the lake and the rolling landscape beyond it. Quite different from the gate room on Atlantis.

"Ugh, you're hopeless." John grumbled and got to his feet with a grimace. He crossed the floor and held his hand out. "C'mon."

"Where're we going?" Sam frowned, eyeing him suspiciously.

John nodded towards the door. "Tavern. You need a social life, I need a beer or whatever they pass for it anyway." He grimaced as he put weight on his foot again.

Sam held back a smile, but found that she didn't want to argue. The way he held his hand out…he probably didn't do that to Larrin. She hoped. "Alright. I guess the reports can wait."

"Xiaoyi's not here. Who's gonna tell?" John asked rhetorically and pulled her to her feet. Then he moved to hold the door open for her.

_Woolsey might_ , but Sam refrained from saying so. Instead, she simply turned off the oil lamp and followed John into the crisp and cool night air, a smile on her lips.

* * *

It was clear by the Tikwee colonists' behaviour towards Colonel Carter that she'd earned their respects and loyalty. And attention, Richard Woolsey noted with a wry smile. Until Carter and Sheppard had arrived, laughing at some joke, he'd held the attention of everyone seated around the table. Now, the Tikwee seemed to have forgotten him. At least for the moment.

Not that Richard minded. Entertaining foreign ambassadors wasn't exactly a well-developed skill of his. It had taken all his little greys to carry on a conversation with everyone around the table at once. He hadn't exactly racked up the same amount of off-world stories as the notable Colonel Carter.

"And when Turghan threatened to stone the girl…?" Togar asked at Richard's right, his eyes wide.

"Well…" Carter grimaced. "Moghul told us using force to free her would lead to war between the two tribes, so he suggested a different approach. Apparently, the chieftains of each tribe could challenge the other to a one-on-one fight to the death. Seeing as I'd been presented as SG-1's chieftain…I fought him."

"And kicked his ass, Jackson told me." Sheppard smirked and took a gulp of his beer. It seemed to Richard that his eyes danced as he met Carter's.

Carter only smiled. "Some might say he deserved it. I only wanted to make him release Nya."

"Does that mean you killed him?" asked one of the Tikwee elders, a woman with elaborate curls flowing down her back. "If it was their custom…"

"It's not mine," said Carter firmly. Her eyes glinted. "I made him yield. That was enough. I wasn't after bloodshed."

"An admirable quality, Colonel." Togar nodded gravely. "A lesson I'm sure others would benefit from."

"Of that I have no doubt," Richard spoke at last, and gained everyone's attention. He met Carter's eyes across the table and raised his glass in her honour. "To Colonel Carter." He paused for a moment, judging his choice of words. "May those who challenge you regret it."

"Hear, hear!" the Tikwee called out approvingly and raised their glasses in the air.

Sheppard, however, stared at him, his eyes intense. For a second, Richard expected the worst. The man had never put a damper on his opinion of the IOA. But then…Sheppard's lips twitched and he smirked at Carter. "Wise words."

Richard held back a sigh of relief.

* * *

"So…Woolsey's turned 'round," John remarked quietly as they made their way back to the mine camp. He felt slightly inebriated; it'd been some time since he'd had anything alcoholic in his system. There wasn't a lot of it going around on Atlantis these days. In this state, he didn't mind that he walked closer to Sam than he'd done for months.

The nearly full moon shone brightly, not a hint of clouds on the night sky. High above them, the snow-capped mountain glittered eerily along with the local star constellations John was just starting to know. Sam had pointed out a few of them on his past visits.

"Apparently." Sam smiled. She crossed her arms tightly and John noticed she was trembling a little beneath her Atlantis leather jacket.

"Here," John said. He pulled off his jacket and hung it on her shoulders. The cold dug a little deeper into his bones, but John didn't care.

"Thanks," Sam said softly and drew the slightly oversized jacket closer around herself. It was a sight that turned over his insides a little and made them flutter. John pushed the feeling down automatically. It wasn't like that anymore.

"So when's your next visit to Atlantis?" John asked, strolling next to her with his hands deep in his pockets. They were on top of the slanted hill overlooking the mine camp when Sam stopped.

"Two weeks, if all goes according to plan." She bit her lip and stared down at the lake, in which the moon and mountain reflected like a clear mirror. "I'm sending Hailey with the next supply run. I'll take the opportunity to visit the Genii again. See if they've found someone who can supply the thrusters I need. Not to mention all the small things, like plating and bolts."

"Right."

John's tone must've said more than intended, because Sam turned to him with a wry smile. "I know you don't like it, but they're our allies now."

"I know that," John muttered. "Just… Never mind."

Sam looked like she wanted to say something, but held back and withdrew her eyes instead.

After several long, tense moments she said, "I never expected we'd be divided like this, John. After Earth was lost…it never crossed my mind we'd bring this side of her with us." She sighed almost mournfully. "We've been involved in things bigger than petty rivalry between nations for more than a decade, but once it hit close to home…we drew back. What does that say about us?"

"When it gets down to it, everyone's worried about their own skin," John said lowly, staring at the moon reflected in the lake. He glanced at her. "But that's the past. You put us back out there."

"No." Sam shook her head. A soft smile played on her lips as she turned to face him. She was beautiful. " _You_  did, John. If it hadn't been for you, I would've…" She paused, suddenly sheepish as she looked at her own feet. Her voice was low as she said, "I owe you a great deal, John."

A hot and uneasy churn made his insides twist. Feeling extremely awkward, John shifted on his feet and focused his eyes on everything but the woman next to him. He almost felt lightheaded, but mostly tense. What could he possibly respond to  _that_? Was she just talking about the picture Coolidge stole, or was it something else?

"Don't worry about it," John said eventually. He met Sam's eyes awkwardly. Was that a blush on her cheeks?"Just finish what you've started."

* * *

**DAY 208**

" _Atlantis command,_ Daedalus _requests permission for take-off."_ Caldwell's voice was loud and clear on the speakers in the operations centre.

From where he stood at the back, John could only see the top of Xiaoyi's head as she stood rank next to a front console. However, he heard the steel in her voice very well as she responded, " _Daedalus_ , this is Atlantis command. You've got permission for take-off. Godspeed and be careful out there. That's a brand new ship you're flying."

"Daedalus _confirms. Thank you for all the good work. Keep a light on for us. Caldwell out."_

On the wall-mounted screen, John saw the dot labelled  _Daedalus_ take off from the left-hand pier on the Atlantis blueprint. A dotted course showed the direction into the atmosphere as it sped away of the city.

Silence fell in the operations centre. Xiaoyi turned around to gaze at them all, her eyes lingering for a moment on the person next to John, and then she left for her glass office without another word. There was no mistaking the ice in her features.

"I guess it was too much to expect a motivating speech," John said lowly to his neighbour.

Sam grinned at him. "I'm sure when the IOA's finished processing the efficiency reports Dawkins handed in, you'll eat your words."

"You saying my leadership skills stink?" John raised an eyebrow in challenge.

"Administrative skills, maybe," Sam teased. "You were never one for reports."

"Great, so I'll get motivational speeches so I can write reports better. Bureaucrats," John swore below his breath. He shook his head and looked at her. "So…did you get my package last week?"

"Yes," Sam said. "Thanks. It runs much smoother now that it actually holds together with more than MacGyver tape."

"Always happy to help." John smirked. Bolts and screws had a tendency to do just that. No point having a weapon that'd burst to pieces at its debut.

He nodded towards the staircase as the operations centre began to clear out of its excess personnel. Together, they descended and made their way towards the transporter.

"Infirmary, then the gym?" Sam asked as they entered the transporter and the doors closed.

"Of course," John said. "Keller said she's noticed some progress. Both Reika and the other Kadarian children showed the same signs. Could be we'll get good news one day soon."

"I'd like that." Sam smiled, her eyes soft. She did that a lot these days. John figured he understood why. There was a lot more to smile about.

It was all coming together. Piece by piece, they were righting the wrongs. That's all that mattered.

* * *

  
**Next:** "I've got your back."

* * *


	17. DAY 237

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When one of the people under her command is seriously injured on an off-world mission with the Genii, Sam must risk exposure to make sure he’ll survive.

**  
**

* * *

**SIXTEEN | "I've got your back."**

_Prompt: A time to keep silent_

* * *

**DAY 237**

An anguished scream tore through the night. Birds startled out of their nests in the rainforest nearby, their caws sharp and rattling.

"Ma'am, we've got to  _do_  something," Reese pleaded. She shifted her look between the blood seeping through her fingers to the colonel. Carter's eyes were dark and hardened. "He's gonna die!"

Beneath her on the cold, rocky mountain cliff, Ramirez moaned as Lt Ferrars injected a morphine shot. His eyes rolled in their sockets, his face chalk white and sickly in the silvery moonlight.

"Colonel, my men—" The Genii Commander Taron hissed in the background, but Carter cut him off abruptly.

"Ferrars?" Carter asked tersely, her eyes locked with Taron's in silent anger.

"This is beyond me, ma'am." The male medic tightened the knot on the tourniquet around Ramirez's injured thigh, above the wounds. "It nicked the artery. He needs surgery."

"Damnit," Carter cursed beneath her breath. For a moment, she said nothing, but Reese could see her stare transfixed at Ramirez as if deciding what to do. Eventually, she snapped her head sideways. "Hailey! Dial Atlantis. Radio Sheppard and let him know we're coming through. Medical emergency."

"What about  _my_ men?" Taron seethed. The lean, dark commander pushed into Carter's personal space. "They're still out there!"

"It's their own goddamn fault!" Reese yelled angrily, her muscles screaming as she pushed down with both hands into Ramirez's thigh, clenched as if around the Genii commander's throat. "If you hadn't sent them after that beast none of this would've happened!"

"Captain," Carter snapped, her palm raised. She met her eyes warningly. Reese clamped her mouth shut, but blood still rung in her ears. "Commander," Carter addressed Taron icily. "Walk with me."

The Genii commander looked as angry as Reese felt, but followed Carter nevertheless out of earshot. By the DHD, Cpt. Hailey and Ronon traced the two with their eyes. A few metres away on the edge of the cliff, the stargate groaned into life.

"Move your hands, Captain," Ferrars urged her, his voice low and steady. "I need to find the artery and clamp it. Take these." He handed her large compression bandages. "Be ready to put them on."

Reese bit her lower lip and glanced at Ramirez. His dark eyes focused a little on her face. A lump formed in her throat. Reluctantly, she let go.

"Hang in there, buddy," Reese told Ramirez lowly. "I owe you that beer, remember?"

A tired snort briefly passed his lips, replaced abruptly by a groan as Ferrars dug two fingers into the gash on his thigh. Pain reflected on Ramirez's face and she fumbled with her spare hand for his. She clenched it tightly and felt him respond with unexpected strength.

"Just a little longer, Sarge," Reese mumbled, her voice on the verge of breaking. Ramirez bit down on his teeth, his face pale and sweaty. "You're gonna be alright. Keller's gonna fix you up. Just hang in there."

"Damnit, it's slippery!" Ferrars cursed below his breath, his usual calm broken. He dug deeper into the wound, causing Ramirez to cry out. "I'm sorry, Sergeant. I've almost got it."

Reese looked away, tears in her eyes. The cliff edge lit up as the unstable vortex burst from the stargate, then settled into its water-like event horizon. Hailey stepped forward and talked lowly into her radio, looking from Carter and the Genii commander to Ramirez and Reese. The worry was clear behind the woman's determined features.

"I've got it," Ferrars sighed in relief. Reese looked back to see him attach a haemostat in the wound. "The bandages," he gestured hurriedly.

Reese handed him the bandages, already spotted red with blood from her hands, and Ferrars tied them tightly around Ramirez's thigh. Her other hand, clenched around Ramirez's fingers, never lost its grip as Ferrars worked to make the sergeant ready for moving.

"How is he?" Carter kneeled down next to them. In the background, the Genii commander spoke lowly to his remaining soldiers. He didn't look happy.

"Stable for now," Ferrars reported. "But if we don't get him into surgery soon…"

"Everything's sorted on the other side. You're in good hands, Sergeant," Carter said, touching Ramirez's leg. To Ferrars and Reese, she said, "You know the drill. This is a black ops mission. I do the talking. Get ready to move out."

* * *

John hurried into the operations centre. On the spur of the moment he'd decided to put Chuck on graveyard shift tonight instead of Shang and for that he was grateful. The man simply acknowledged him and asked no questions about why Sam had dialled in from somewhere that wasn't Tirana.

"They're on their way," Chuck told him as he passed. "Dr Keller's been alerted to the emergency."

"Good," John nodded and stared down at the active stargate. For several long seconds he waited. Then the event horizon rippled with motion.

Sam stepped out first. She'd taken off her gear and was clad in simple BDUs. Anything to appear unsuspicious. Her eyes immediately swung around to meet his.

Relief filled him as he saw she was uninjured, but the emotion in her eyes made him push it down.

She looked back as four others came through the stargate. Hailey, Matthews, and Ferrars carried Ramirez between them on a makeshift stretcher. The sergeant was deathly pale and bloody.

"Let's get him down to the infirmary," Sam told them without pause.

John descended quickly and joined in as they moved towards the transporter. "What happened?"

"Later," Sam hissed, glancing over her shoulder. It was the middle of the night, so there shouldn't be anyone around. Even so, this was a special circumstance. "Who was on night duty?"

"Chuck. He won't say anything," John assured her. "Where's Ronon?"

"Stayed behind," Sam said tersely, an angry flash in her eyes. By her tone he supposed there was special importance to that fact.

They got into the transporter and exited on the infirmary level. As they rushed into the infirmary ward Keller met them with a no-nonsense look on her face.

"Get him on the bed," Keller ordered and strapped on a couple of sterile gloves. "Make a hole." She wedged past Matthews, who clung onto Ramirez's hand with fervour. John noticed her hands and clothes were bloody, and she had a nasty cut and bruise on one side of her head. She wore full combat gear, which made sense as she was supposedly on security shift tonight along with Ramirez and Ronon.

"It's the artery," Ferrars reported, his features grim and worn. "I stopped the bleeding, gave him a morphine shot and put in an IV, but he's lost a lot of blood."

"Okay, let's get him into surgery," Keller said after examining the wounds on Ramirez's thigh underneath the bandages. She gestured to a couple of nurses and medical attendants and stepped back as they came to move the bed. "Everyone else, clear out."

"Doctor," Sam stepped forward, but Keller held up a hand.

"I'll let you know how it goes, Colonel." With that Keller disappeared into the surgery room along with her medical staff.

Matthews stared after her, her grimy face showing signs of tears. Next to her, Hailey touched her shoulder. "Come on, Captain. Let's get cleaned up. He'll be alright." It took some coaching, but finally Matthews left with Ferrars and Hailey for the locker rooms and showers.

That left Sam, who stood silently by one of the infirmary beds, her eyes focused on the direction Keller had disappeared into. There were no signs of blood or injuries. Even so, her eyes bordered on the edge of the fabled thousand-yard stare.

John stepped up to her cautiously and grasped her arm. She broke off her stare and he could see the deep emotion in her eyes. He knew what he had to do.

"Let's go," John nudged her to follow. "You need good news."

* * *

"She looks good." It was all Sam could think of to say. For some reason her throat had grown thick and strangled. She curled her hands around the footboard on the infirmary bed. All thoughts of Ramirez, the IOA, the Genii and secret missions had disappeared. At least for now.

"Keller thinks she might even wake up soon," John said, his hands pushed deep into his pockets. There was a softness on his face, though, that belied his otherwise indifferent attitude. It made Sam smile.

Behind him, the machines monitoring Reika's vitals beat steadily and strongly. Even her breath sounded different from last time, in spite of the respirator connected to her mouth.

"I'm glad," Sam choked, then pulled in a sharp, deep breath. Her eyes fluttered close for a moment, but the sight that met her when they opened remained the same.

Reika's features had smoothed and even though her hair still remained more white than golden, she looked closer to her age than before. Jennifer's experimental method had worked – and not only on Reika. The other Kadarian children had also responded well to their treatments over the past months.

It was nothing short of a miracle. So far.

Sam grinned. Wetness grazed her cheeks and she wiped off the tears with the back of her hand, aware that John stared. She managed another smile once she met his eyes, however. "I haven't had good news like this in a  _long_  time."

John smirked in response and raised an eyebrow. "You  _did_ hear they're gonna try making Jell-O, right?"

Sam chuckled. "Yes. Save me some and I'll figure out a way to make you some golf balls. Or get McKay to put a tracker on the ones you've got left."

Apparently the very thought drew out one of John's rare grins. "Pinky swear?"

"Sure," Sam smirked, her cheeks slightly heated. The atmosphere caused her stomach to flutter. In an effort to change the subject, she released the footboard and stepped to the other side of the hospital bed. Reika's hand was small in her own, but she squeezed it tightly nevertheless. "She's a fighter."

"The finest," John agreed. One hand had snaked out of a pocket and rested on the linen covers, close to Reika's thin, pale arm. He curled his fingers uneasily, though, before returning his hand to his pants pocket.

Sam noticed, their eyes met, and an awkward moment of silence fell over them.

"I wonder what'll happen with them," she said eventually. She brushed aside a white strand of hair from Reika's still pale but pink cheeks. "When they wake up."

"I dunno," John admitted. He shifted on his feet, glancing between the heartbeat monitor and Reika. The girl's machine-like breath broke the quiet. "Maybe we'll find someone to look after them."

Sam's stomach coiled. "Off Atlantis?"

John's dark grimace gave her the answer. Even if people on Atlantis had showed some interest in the kids since they were brought here after the attack on Kadara, the fact remained that they were Kadarians, not Earthborn.

"I know someone on Tirana who might be interested in adoption," Sam said, her voice hushed. Something in her constricted. "They'd be in good homes. Have other kids to grow up with."

"Probably safer than this place," John said. He stared at her, something indiscernible in his eyes. Sam looked back at Reika. The little girl's chest rose up and down in accordance to the monitor. She swallowed a lump in her throat.

"Probably," Sam agreed quietly.

Silence hushed the atmosphere for several minutes, broken only by Reika's machine-like breath. Neither moved. They both stared at the little girl who'd been given a taste of what life in this galaxy could entail. Sam's own mind drifted, but she kept her eyes on Reika, afraid she'd drift as well.

Finally, in a low tone, John asked, "What happened?"

Her hand tightened around Reika's, but Sam tipped her chin up to meet John's dark eyes. Cold frustration twisted her insides. "The Genii lied."

* * *

_Six hours earlier_

* * *

"Everything in order?" Sam asked Taron, the Genii commander who'd been assigned to her by Ladon Radim on this standard Wraith data retrieval mission.

The dark-haired, olive-skinned man sported a full beard, which almost hid the smile he gave her. "Yes, Colonel. My men and I are ready. Yours?"

"They'll meet us on the other side," Sam nodded and attached her P90 to the TAC vest. She snapped a magazine into it and made sure the safety was on. "Let's move out."

"You heard the Colonel," Taron told his men, a bunch of male soldiers in beige, woollen uniforms slightly reminding Sam of the WW2 Russian uniforms. He smiled, revealing even white teeth.

Sam returned the smile and led the way through the event horizon.

Moments later, they emerged on the Wraith planet they'd targeted. It was late evening judging by the position of the moon. The stargate stood almost on the edge of a precipice and was surrounded on the remaining three sides by a lush rainforest. The forest sung with nocturnal animal sounds.

Sam stopped by the DHD and listened, then whistled lowly.

From the bushes Hailey rose along with Ronon, Captain Matthews, Sergeant Ramirez and Lieutenant Ferrars. They were barely visible in their camouflaged BDUs. All had their usual weapons strapped to their chests and thighs.

"Sitrep," Sam requested as they all converged close to the edge of the rainforest. Taron kneeled down next to her, his men behind him.

"We've located the outpost a couple of klicks from here," Hailey said, being the senior officer of the scout group. She'd been promoted a month before Matthews. "Medium security, but we managed to find a back entrance far off from any life signs."

"Alright, you know the drill," Sam nodded at them, then turned to Taron. "We go in like last time. Hailey and Ronon, you're on the C4."

"Michel, Rappa, you will join them," Taron told two of his guys, giving them a second look. They muttered in affirmative. Satisfied, Taron turned back to Sam. "We are ready."

"The rest of us will locate a data console and download what we can," Sam explained, giving Matthews and Ramirez a specific stare. "Stun or silent kills. Let's try not to make too much noise, at least not outside. If the Ancient database is correct, the wildlife here's not too fond of it."

"So we wait to blow up the outpost until we're back here?" Matthews asked.

"Yes," Sam nodded. "That's the plan. Try to stick to it."

* * *

They found the outpost easily enough with Ronon on point leading the way solidly through the overgrown rainforest and marking their way back. Like other outposts they'd seen it was typical organic Wraith design, but this was the first Sam had seen where the forest seemed to have embraced it as one of its own. Vines, moss and overhanging branches covered great parts of its outer walls. If the life signs detector hadn't picked up the energy signals within, they might've passed it in the dim light.

After a half-hour of their silent, slow approach they reached the back entrance Hailey said was least surrounded by life signs. Hailey checked her life signs detector again and signalled the green light.

With hand motions Sam made Ronon take point again with Hailey close behind. Once they'd gone inside and stood in a darkened T-shaped corridor, weapons covering all three directions, Sam spoke mutedly.

"One hour, guys. If we're separated, get back to the stargate." She looked at all of them. Ferrars nodded in reply. "When I give the word, Hailey, light the place up."

"Copy that, ma'am," Hailey affirmed.

Taron supplied an acknowledging nod, and gestured for his men to split up. Michel and Rappa joined Hailey and Ronon down one direction of the corridor, while Sam gestured Matthews to take point down the opposite one. Matthews had successfully completed the ATA gene therapy, so she operated a second Ancient life signs detector.

It took them less than twenty minutes to locate a data console Sam could interface with. Thanks to Matthews they didn't run into any Wraith, nor did they appear to have set off any traps or alarms since they'd entered the outpost.

While Sam connected the data console to her tablet computer, Matthews and Ramirez took up positions by the door. The rest of Taron's men were outside in the corridor, covering a T-section right next to the chamber they were in.

"This has become rather easy," Taron remarked next to Sam. He stood straight, his arms crossed as he glanced around him. "Your detectors are quite a feat."

"They come in handy," Sam acknowledged with a little smirk, although her neck tensed. The Genii had already asked for a life signs detector in their negotiations, but Sam recognised the issue was bigger than a simple device like that. The Genii didn't have the ATA gene naturally in their population, which meant that to operate the life signs detector they'd need the gene therapy as well, and Sam knew better than to open  _that_ can of worms. This alliance of theirs was precarious at best, and the Genii far outnumbered them. If they realised Atlantis no longer had the strength of Earth behind them… Sam forced herself not to think about it. It'd be detrimental to their alliance at this point. For now, she'd keep the secret of Earth from them. They couldn't afford to become an underdog right now.

"How long do you think it will take?" Taron nodded towards the console.

"It'll take a few minutes to break the encryption," Sam replied, relieved about the distraction. "But I should be able to start the download in about five minutes. From then on…it depends on how much data I'm able to access."

Taron looked at his old-fashioned pocket watch in a gesture that prompted Sam to ask, "Nervous?"

"Not at all," Taron smiled. "This routine has become familiar to us."

Sam smirked. "Me too."

She would've said more, but Hailey's voice sounded in her earpiece radio. " _Colonel. We've found one of the relay rooms. Setting up shop now."_

Sam pushed the reply button on her radio. "Good. I'm gonna start the download in a few minutes. Carter out."

"And so it begins," Taron winked and withdrew to observe a few containers of some yellow liquid attached to the wall, fiddling with something in his hands. Presumably his pocket watch, Sam reckoned. A series of steady  _ticks_ sounded mutely in the silence _._  It made her conscious of her own watch. Mission time was already 43 minutes and counting.

She had work to do.

* * *

"So…what's your favourite band?" Hailey asked out loud as she pushed a wireless detonator device into a pack of C4.

Ronon gave her a raised eyebrow, then took the C4 out of her hands and attached it to the organic power relays on the wall. The relays pulsed steadily with a sort of luminescent light, reminding Hailey of a documentary on the bloodstream she'd seen once.

"Come on," Hailey prompted and readied the next pack of C4 for detonation. "Band? Music? I'm sure in your five years on Atlantis someone must've made you listen to  _something._ Or maybe something from Sateda? _"_

"Carson made me listen to somethin' called bagpoyps," Ronon muttered as he worked.

"Uh…bagpipes?" Hailey held back a grin.

"Sounded like animal whines," Ronon shrugged and left it at that. He took another ready-to-detonate pack of C4 from Hailey and attached it on a different part of the wall. Seeing as it was the last pack to be placed, Ronon picked up his stunner handgun.

"You might be right about that," Hailey winced, thinking of her own live experiences of the Scottish national instrument. It always sounded so mournful. She nestled the P90 in her arms and started towards the chamber exit. "Let's get outta here. Hey, Michel, Rappa—"

The Genii soldiers were supposed to be in the corridor keeping a lookout. She'd seen them herself not two minutes ago. Now they weren't anywhere to be seen. Hailey stared down either direction of the corridor, hand automatically pulling out the life signs detector from a large pocket on her BDU pants. No use shouting after them to attract attention.

Ronon got on the radio next to her and said mutely, "Rappa, this is Ronon. What's your position?"

The detector came alive in Hailey's hand. Immediately, it zoomed in on their position. Just two life signs in the vicinity: herself and Ronon. She zoomed out – there!

"I've got them. I think." Hailey bit her lip. "Two life signs moving rapidly away. Too hurried for Wraiths unless they like to run around their own base—Wait!" She hissed below her breath. "What the hell are they doing?"

Ronon looked over her shoulder. On the screen, the two life signs she'd been following were stopping next to a clutter of five other life signs. Within a moment they'd joined them, like they'd crossed a threshold into a chamber.

Then the klaxons went off.

" _Fuck."_

* * *

" _Colonel, Taron's guys ran off. It seems they've made some sort of contact with five other life signs, but I can't tell if it's Wraith or not."_  Hailey's voice was frustrated and tense in Sam's ear.  _"But we sure as hell didn't set off that alarm."_

Sam sent Taron a narrowed stare, but the man said nothing. He stood unassuming by the yellow liquid containers with his hands on his back.

"Ma'am, I'm reading multiple life signs bearing down on our location," Matthews called out, the life signs detector in her hand. Next to her, Ramirez aimed down his sight and into the corridor outside. "Some of them are moving pretty fast. Too fast for normal Drones."

Sam cursed beneath her breath, her fists clenched. Only Wraith Commanders were faster than Drones and a hell of a lot harder to take down. If they managed to block their only exit route…

"Get back to the stargate," she told Hailey on the radio and began to hurriedly pack down her computer gear. "I managed to get some of the data before their security kicked in. We'll meet you there."

" _Copy that, ma'am."_

"We've got incoming!" Ramirez reported, mere moments before the Genii soldiers out in the corridor began to fire their type of projectile weapons. The gunshots echoed in the chamber, overshadowing the muted energy crackle from the Wraith stunners.

"The mission's scrubbed," Sam yelled tersely above the gunfire, hoisting her backpack up. Taron had turned abruptly on his heel and seemed tense as well, but he wasn't focused on her. He clutched his pocket watch tightly, his knuckles white. "Cover fire, Sergeant. We're moving out."

" _No_ ," Taron seized her arm tightly. "We cannot leave. My men—they'll come. Just give them a few minutes. They'll get here."

"We  _can't_  wait," Sam snapped and wrenched her arm angrily out of his grip. Her eyes narrowed in suspicion, but this was not the time. "I don't know what the hell your men are up to, but if we don't move  _now,_ the Wraith will have our exit blocked in minutes.  _Your men_ ," Sam said in a hiss, "will have to catch up. Matthews, which way?"

With only the barest of looks at the two commanders, Matthews rechecked the Ancient detector. Her brows furrowed. "Left. I estimate we've got four minutes, probably less."

"Right, I'll take point," Sam stated, readying her P90 in her hands and flipping the safety off. "Matthews, you're behind me. Then you, Commander, and the rest of your men. Ramirez will cover our six," Sam ordered, then moved to the exit and peeked outside above Ramirez's shoulder. Four Wraith Drones were cooped up down the corridor to her right, lying in cover from the Genii soldiers' fire. Some of the Drones returned fire; a series of blue stun shots aimed at the Genii hit dangerously close to target. The soldiers flinched away into cover.

"Colonel,  _please_ ," Taron insisted. "A little time, that's all I ask. Give them a chance to—"

"To do  _what?"_ Sam bit out and swung around. Taron almost flinched back. "Whatever your menwere up to, they just messed up our primary mission."

"I—I—"

"Ma'am, this place's getting more crowded by the second," Matthews interjected abruptly. "We're about three minutes from having  _all_  exits blocked."

Sam cursed beneath her breath and glared at Taron, whose eyes had darkened slightly. "Either get moving, Commander, or stay behind. Your choice. We don't have time for this."

Taron's jaw clenched, his eyes like steel. Then he withdrew what looked like an old-fashioned, slightly bulky radio from his pocket and said, "This is Taron. Everyone, return to the stargate."

Sam ignored Matthews' raised eyebrow and narrowed eyes, and patted Ramirez's shoulder. He moved into the corridor, P90 firing in concentrated bursts, and the game was on.

* * *

Across the small river crossing, the damn Wraith only raised his arms in a taunt when her P90 clicked empty, her last bullets now soaked up in the Commander's organic armour. It was small comfort that the moonlight revealed his wounds had stopped closing quickly.

"Why doesn't he just  _keel over_?" Hailey groaned as she slammed a new magazine into her P90. So much for getting out of that complex alive.

Something blue filled the corner of her eye and she flinched back behind the tree trunk, making the stun shot soar past her cheek in a rush of heat. For a moment, the darkness of the forest was broken, then the shadows swallowed them up again; thick, towering, and suffocating. She wished they'd take their pursuer with them.

"Stubborn bastard," Hailey muttered.

Poised next to her behind the thick tree, Ronon simply snorted. He fiddled with their last grenade – a flashbang – in his hands, which gave her a sense of déjà vu. She only hoped she didn't have to hitch a ride as Ronon's backpack this time.

Hailey steeled herself for another round and swung out, opening a volley of pattering 5.7mm rounds across the river crossing splitting the forest in two. Accuracy was only slightly off due to the silencer on her P90, but the bullets quickly sprayed down the Wraith Commander's back, sending out bursts of black liquid. He jerked away from the Drone he'd leaned over and with a fluent and effortless roll, he took up a crouching position by his next dying Drone companion. Hailey aimed again and fired, but the Commander jumped away safely into a beam of moonlight, peering back at her with a freaky smile of pointed teeth. A taunt to do it again.

In her pause of hesitation, he struck out with his feeding hand at one of the faceless Drones spread around him on the ground. She could see the black wounds close on his back where she'd hit him.

"I'd give anything to swap this guy for a Goa'uld," Hailey mumbled, slightly sickened by the sight. "I feel like Buffy."

"Isn't that a good thing?" Ronon asked, peering around the tree trunk. "You need to be in shape to fight guys like these."

"Uh…" Hailey frowned, but decided now wasn't the time to inform the Satedan that being buff and being Buffy were two completely different things. "You ready with that thing?"

"On three," Ronon stated, holding the flashbang at the ready. He had the best throw of the two. It would only be a distraction, but hopefully it'd be enough. Flashbangs generated heat. It'd confuse the Wraith's thermal vision. In theory.

Hailey clicked her radio. "We're ready, ma'am."

" _Good. He's in our sights; we'll take it from here. Get back to the stargate and dial it up ASAP. We'll be coming in hot."_

"Copy," Hailey responded and clicked off. She looked at Ronon. "Showtime."

Without another word, Ronon swung out and lobbed the flashbang across the river crossing. The Wraith Commander recognised the threat and tried to get to his feet, but the forest lit up in a sharp, stinging light and high-pitched whines that rung in Hailey's ears.

Her hearing returned with the Colonel's voice yelling in her ears, " _Now! Get going!"_

A patter of silenced P90 fire echoed mutely in the overgrown forest, and Hailey spared only a second glance behind her as she and Ronon took off.

The Commander's eyes were directed at her, but they'd changed. The smile was gone. In its stead, an inhuman wail tore through her mind with an intensity that made her dizzy.

Someone gripped her arm and dragged her off along uneven ground. Hailey stumbled on something and opened her eyes.

Ronon stared stiffly across his shoulder at the small river crossing. There was worry in his dark eyes. He'd felt the wail as well. It was a message, but not to them.

* * *

"Shit! They're catching up!" Matthews called out from behind Sam. They'd broken into a run along their marked path in the rainforest, but so far none of them had seen a single Wraith Drone on their tails for at least fifteen minutes. Not since they'd killed the Wraith Commander back at the river crossing. "Five life signs. They're coming at all sides.  _Fast._ "

" _What_? How's that possible?" Sam breathed heavily, the weight of the P90 in her hands comforting but slippery in sweaty palms. "They couldn't have moved that quickly in this terrain."

"Maybe they've got shortcuts," Ferrars reasoned, just a few steps ahead of Sam. He was nearly invisible in the darkness of the overgrown forest.

"Whatever they've got, they're gonna overtake us." Matthews sounded anxious. "Soon."

Sam cursed. They weren't equipped with night vision goggles and the Wraith possessed it naturally along with thermal vision. Even if they'd taken the shortest route possible to the stargate, they could end up at an unfavourable spot when the Wraith finally overcame them.

It couldn't be helped. They still had about two hundred metres left to the stargate, give or take. Unless they bought more time they wouldn't make it.

"Matthews, Ramirez, take cover," Sam called out, using her radio for emphasis. She made a complete halt, her muscles burning. Her heart beat like crazy. She took a deep breath. "We'll draw their attention. The rest make their way back to the stargate."

Taron wheezed behind her. "Colonel, I cannot leave…"

"Get back to the stargate, Commander," Sam hissed and glared at him. "You've done enough. Ferrars!" The lieutenant ran up to her. "Make sure the Commander and his men get back to Outpost Alpha and hold them there. I've got questions."

The darkness hid the dark features of Taron's face, but it was clear from his tone that he loathed the idea. However, with Ferrars holding a hand threateningly on his sidearm Taron had little choice. Earth weapons outdid Genii ones any day.

"Ma'am!" Matthews said sharply, having found a position behind a rock formation next to Ramirez. "They're almost here!"

Sam pushed Taron aside and waved at everyone else to run. "Go!"

Everyone but Sam, Matthews and Ramirez ran off into the undergrowth. Sam hurried to the others' position, covering their backs as they crouched behind the rocks.

"Stay frosty," she told the others and pulled her P90 close. Taking aim, she longed for night vision goggles. Being at a disadvantage sucked.

"They're not pursuing the others," Matthews muttered lowly, her breath noticeably calmer.

"Good," Sam tightened her resolve. Sweat ran down her face and neck. She took deep breaths, trying to ease her racing pulse. "There are just five of them. We'll get them. As soon as they're down, we're gonna make a run for the stargate. Ronon and Hailey should be ready for us."

"Before the wildlife wakes up and mutilates us, ma'am?" Matthews asked, her voice a little shaky. Sam knew she had a good head on her, but this was only her third mission off world since Kadara. She'd earned some slack.

"Before that, yes," Sam said in a low voice.

"Pop 'em once in the head," Ramirez mumbled. He chewed intensely on a gum, the white in his eyes lit up in the thin rays of moonlight. "Less noise, more time."

Sam opened her mouth to respond 'if it was  _that_ easy…', but Matthews spoke up first, her voice a lowered hush. "They're here."

A chorus of growls and whines surrounded them on all sides. Sam saw movement about four metres away, but not at the height she'd expected. The bushes rustled only three feet off the ground, not six. Her grip tightened on the P90.

"Uh… Wraiths don't growl," Ramirez mumbled tensely. "Do they?"

* * *

Ronon's head snapped up.

Hailey noticed and stopped her pacing. "What?"

"Listen," Ronon muttered, staring back at the thick, overgrown rainforest. The moon glittered down on it, giving it an eerie glow.

Hailey perked her ears, her brows furrowed in concentration. All she could hear was…a fat load of nothing. Her eyes widened. Three seconds ago it'd sounded like a damn orchestra out there. It was like the forest had stopped breathing for a moment.

"Movement," Ronon nodded to the edge of the treeline and raised his stunner, which was set for stun.

Shadowy figures sprung forth from the bushes and undergrowth. Some of them stumbled as they escaped the treeline, pushing back up on their feet. It was the other Genii, led by Commander Taron.

Hailey turned sharply and aimed down the sights of the P90. She didn't ease up until she saw Lieutenant Ferrars emerge from behind the Genii Commander, his sidearm in his hands.

"Where're the others?" she demanded as soon as they were close enough.

"We got—surrounded—five of them," Ferrars gasped slightly. He breathed deeply in through his nose, sweat shining on his face. "The colonel and the others stayed behind to take them out—about two hundred metres southwest of here."

"Damnit," Hailey cursed and turned her radio on. "Colonel, this is Hailey. Do you need assistance? We can be at your location in—"

" _Negative, Captain,"_  Carter's voice boomed in her ear. Hailey winced slightly as she heard the muted patter of weapons fire in the background.  _"Dial up the gate. We're on our way back. Our ETA's about two minutes. We'll—"_

Someone screamed. A guttural, life-twisting scream. Hailey's insides froze.

" _Fuck!"_ Carter cursed loudly. More weapons fire burst hushed in the background. " _Get him out of here, Matthews. I'll cover you. Hailey, we're coming in hot!"_

"Copy that," Hailey acknowledged, her insides twisting. "We'll be ready." She turned to Ferrars and Ronon. "Get in position. We've got incoming. Two minutes."

"I'll keep a look on them," Ferrars nodded towards Taron and the other Genii soldiers. He held his sidearm ready to fire either direction if need be. "The colonel's got questions."

"Fine, just find some cover," Hailey nodded, then took off with Ronon to find a position between the stargate and the treeline. A range of rocks and bushes off to the side offered some cover, so they crouched down behind them, their eyes on the lookout for movement.

Hailey dug out her life signs detector and scrutinised the screen. "They're almost here. Seems they've got one stalker."

"Should be easy," Ronon said lowly, his stun weapon out and pointed at the treeline.

Seeing as one of them had been injured already, Hailey wasn't just as sure.

Growls, caws, clucking and howls tore through the night, setting the little hairs on the back of her neck at end. The forest awoke again with a roar. Hailey pulled up her P90 and stared at the treeline.

"There," Ronon said.

Matthews hurried out of the rainforest, Ramirez limping heavily next to her. His head lolled. Hailey's insides twisted. Blood pounded in her ears.

A heartbeat later, Carter backpedalled out of the treeline, her P90 flashing with weapons fire at something in front of her.

Suddenly, something large leapt out of the forest two metres above the colonel. It hit the ground behind Matthews and Ramirez and soared forward in one continuous motion. It pushed them to the ground and Matthews was flung sideways. She landed hard on the rocky cliff edge and didn't move. Ramirez landed a few feet away from what Hailey saw now was  _definitely_ no Wraith.

A monstrous, four-legged creature covered in silvery scales and fur barred two sets of white, jagged teeth and let out a long, high-pitched howl that echoed in her mind. White, pupil-less eyes descended on Ramirez.

Hailey didn't hesitate. She opened fire. Beside her, Ronon joined in.

The beast howled as the bullets and stun blasts hit it, but it didn't seem to have any effect. It snapped sideways, turning its scaly sides towards them. The bullets couldn't penetrate it.

" _No_!" someone shouted from somewhere, but Hailey was too busy to notice. The beast leapt out of her line of fire and tried again to make a run for Ramirez. She quickly re-aimed and sent a series of bullets across its legs. It jumped again, its thick leg muscles visible beneath its scaly kind of exoskeleton.

" _Aim for the head,_ " Carter's voice sounded from Hailey's radio. She'd somehow gotten to Matthews and crouched by her, helping her up from the ground and away from the creature's range. Once on their feet, the colonel joined in the fire, her face lit up by the flash from the weapons muzzle as 5.7mm bullets shot out through a silencer.

Just as Hailey trailed her bullets towards the beast's head, it spun its hardened scaly back towards her. The thing was too fast for her to keep track of.

Then someone tackled into her side.

"No! Don't kill it!" It was Commander Taron. He tried to grapple with Hailey's gun arm. "That's the alpha male. Everyone should use your stunners."

"Get out of the way," Ronon growled and pushed the Genii commander roughly aside. He switched his gun to 'kill mode' and aimed at the creature, poised to attack Ramirez again.

"No!" Taron wrapped his arms around Ronon's neck and pulled him to the ground with his weight. "We've got to take it  _back_  with us."

"You're crazy," Ronon hissed, barring his teeth. He pushed the man off him and rolled to his feet. Taron clung to his gun arm, still struggling. Ronon's eyes glinted. "Hailey."

Hailey wrenched herself away from Taron's reach and aimed. The night broke again with the rapid fire of her P90. The beast roared out in pain as the bullets hit its unprotected skin beneath the scales. It barred its teeth and pearly white eyes in her direction, but didn't move away from Ramirez, who moaned in the sudden silence.

Then two more P90s joined in the fray. Matthews and Carter had outflanked the creature, approaching it from different sides, weapons hot.

The beast growled at the sneak attack, quickly spinning its back towards them. The bullets bounced off the thick scales, but it took a step away from Ramirez. Hailey now understood their tactic.

Ferrars appeared next to her and took over holding Taron so Ronon had his hands free. Hailey took the opportunity to reload, the beast's howls of pain in the background hardening her resolve. Together, Ronon and Hailey stepped around the rocks and began to push the beast away from their side.

It howled under the concentrated fire, rattling and twisting in jagged motions. The motions were nearly a blur as the beast tried to protect itself with its scaly back. The bullets began to hit unprotected flesh, sending out a burst of liquid like silvery mist. The beast's head snapped up in the air and a pained howl emitted from its mouth, tearing through their eardrums like knives.

"Die already!" Matthews screamed. In the flash of the muzzle, Hailey could see blood on her face.

One of Ronon's red killer shots hit the beast's hind leg, and it buckled slightly. Hailey pushed forward, firing in short, concentrated bursts at whatever she could hit besides its back. Some of her bullets hit its wounded leg, tearing through flesh. It spurred her on. The silvery mist – blood most likely – was a welcome sight.

"Grenade out!" Carter shouted and rolled the grenade out while the rest of them kept the beast on a single spot dodging the bullets.

Yellow-red flames burst up beneath the beast's belly. It howled in pain, a high-pitched, guttural tone that made Hailey's head hurt. Heavy drops of liquid began to drip from its unprotected underbelly and it stood on shaky legs, frozen.

With one last, long whine, the beast slumped to the ground, well away from Ramirez's still body. Its body rattled in shaky breaths. Mist burst out from its barred mouth.

Ronon sprinted forward, too fast for her to catch up. With a roar, he grabbed the beast's head from behind and slit its throat in one fluid motion with his long knife. Liquid spurted out into the air. Then he stood over it, silver blood on his knife, and met Hailey's eyes. An adrenaline-induced grin crossed her lips. The man could be so…primal.

But her grin was soon broken.

"Ferrars, get over here!" Carter yelled, kneeling over Ramirez's body. Matthews was next to her, both her hands on the sergeant's thigh. The sergeant convulsed beneath them.

The elation of victory went down the drain like a bucket of cold water.

* * *

"What  _the hell_  were you up to?" Sam demanded icily, inches from Taron's face. She was tempted to wring his neck, but kept it down. " _That?"_

She pointed back at the beast slumped by the treeline, surrounded now by the rest of Taron's men. Whatever they did, she had no idea. Sampling, maybe. What struck home was that Ramirez was down, and Michel and Rappa didn't answer their radio hails. Good men, or so she'd thought.

The man scowled at her, his features even darker in the shadow of the stargate. "You had your mission, I had mine."

"Wrong," Sam hissed and lowered her voice angrily. " _We_ had a mission. Complete a data download of the Wraith network to get their current locations, so we'd know what they were up to.  _Your_  secret agenda almost got us all killed!"

"You shouldn't have killed it," Taron hissed, his eyes full of emotion. He clenched his fists at his sides. "It's a one of a kind. Now we'll never get a chance like this again."

"You've lost two of your men. One of mine's seriously injured. He might  _die._ " Sam grit her teeth. "I'd suggest you never say that again."

"Colonel, you've got no idea what this creature's capable of, the  _possibilities…!_ It's practically a Wraith on four legs – by their  _own_ design – only more vicious and—"

" _I don't care_ ," Sam bit out. She'd had enough. In a single step, she was in Taron's face again, her eyes glinting. "You compromised a joint mission today, Commander," she said in a dangerous tone. "Probably on someone else's authority, but that's a matter for a different day. I'll find out. Even so, you're done here. Go off on your own damn missions if you want to capture beasts. I'm not in it."

Sam held Taron's eyes for another heartbeat, if only to see the defiance in his face and counter it with her own anger, then she turned abruptly. She began to stride back towards Ferrars, passing Hailey and Ronon by the DHD as she did. The stargate was active behind them.

"Ma'am," Hailey drew her attention, taking her hand off her radio. "Keller's been alerted. Sheppard's gonna meet us in the gate room."

"Good," Sam said, her features grim. "Let's blow the outpost and get out of this godforsaken place before the rest of the forest decides to move against us. Ronon, please escort the Genii commander and his men to Outpost Alpha along with our gear. Hold them there until I get back. I'll want a word with Radim."

Ronon eyed Taron darkly, but said nothing. He simply nodded.

"Remember," Sam told her people as they gathered close to the stargate, Ramirez held between them on a foldout stretcher Ferrars had brought. "Not a word to anyone."

* * *

_Eight hours later_

* * *

"You expect us to believe  _that_?" Coolidge sneered. He sat on the edge of Xiaoyi's desk, arms crossed tightly above a suit that looked rather worn. His cold eyes surveyed Sam. "You went for a hunt. In the middle of the night?"

"That's when nocturnal carnivores usually come out," Sam countered coolly, keeping her irritation in check. She turned to Xiaoyi, who sat still in her chair. "We discovered that the Tikwee hunters that went missing two weeks ago were most likely killed by this creature. I decided to go after it and figure out if there were more of these, and make sure they wouldn't attack anyone else. We found a trail and followed it up into the mountains. That's where Sergeant Ramirez was attacked."

"Did you send him carelessly into an ambush as well?" Coolidge narrowed his eyes.

Sam nearly bristled. "No," she said, her tone even icier than before. "The sergeant covered our rear while we searched the creature's lair. That's when he was attacked."

Xiaoyi looked from her colleague to Sam, looking as if she'd just held back a sigh. She leaned forward, her tone diplomatic. "We're not pointing any fingers here, Colonel. However, by what Dr Keller told me, the sergeant received massive injuries to his leg and might've lost it if it hadn't been for Lieutenant Ferrars' first-aid. Apparently, he's very lucky to be alive. If there are more creatures like that on Tirana, though…"

"We only found traces of the one in the vicinity of the colony," Sam stated immediately. She straightened her spine. "Ronon, Captain Hailey, Captain Matthews and myself landed several fatal hits and drove it off. It should be dead somewhere in the mountains. With Ramirez down, I decided not to pursue it. We needed everyone to get him here safely and alive."

"I'm sure the Tikwee feel very safe with  _that_ ," Coolidge mumbled. "For all they know, they'll soon have another attack on their people by this vicious beastof yours."

"I'll take a team out in the Jumper later today and locate the carcass," Sam said, her insides clenched in annoyance. "I'm sure  _they_ will feel safer when they see it's dead."

Coolidge's jaw tightened. The emphasis wasn't lost on him. He opened his mouth to speak, but Xiaoyi cut him off.

"Please express my condolences to Master Togar for their losses. Losing a member of a small society is never easy, let alone four." Xiaoyi gave Sam a long look, her hands clasped calmly on top of the desk. The subtext wasn't lost on Sam either. "I'll expect a full report, of course, as well as an assessment of any continuous danger. If you should locate more of these creatures, you have permission to take them down. We've given a pledge to keep Tirana safe, and I intend to keep it."

"That makes two of us," Sam nodded, but her neck tensed when she met Xiaoyi's calculating eyes. "If there's not anything else, I'd like to get down and check on the Sergeant before I leave."

"Of course," Xiaoyi said. She leaned back and followed Sam with her eyes as she left.

Sam looked back as the back door of the office began to close, just in time to see Coolidge lean closer to Xiaoyi with a twisted look on his face. Xiaoyi's eyes never left her, however, until the door closed fully with a  _swish._

* * *

John found her out on the South Pier, feet dangling off the edge of a popular fishing spot. It seemed odd to see her sitting there, staring down at the dark-blue ocean, her expression eerily detached. Something in his stomach knotted at the sight. He hadn't seen her like that before. After they lost Earth, she'd always turned to Jackson, and before that she'd never seemed to have any reason to look that way.

But now that he was here, he couldn't turn back. John cleared his throat and approached her, "How'd it go with the White Witch?"

Sam's head snapped up, the blank look in her eyes replaced by surprise. She straightened her spine and gave him a small smirk. He let it slide for now.

"I think I pulled it off," Sam said as he sat down next to her. "Only Coolidge seemed suspicious."

"That's no surprise," John muttered darkly. "He'll never buy anything you say these days. Something's changed, but Xiaoyi seems to keep him in her favour all the same. Dawkins seems to like him, the crazy git."

"Maybe I could throw them all off a catwalk," Sam suggested, her tone flat, but an obvious attempt at some sort of humour. John managed a weak smirk. When he looked back on his actions that time, he still felt justified, but he never wanted Sam to be in that position.

Silence stretched out between them and Sam returned her stare to the ocean below. John stared too and saw the bluish algae climbing up the grey metal walls of the pier, but it was the odd emotion in Sam's eyes that made his insides twist.

"So if things went well, relatively speaking…" He trailed off on a questioning note. He didn't want to spell it out. They'd never been like that with each other. Only once, and John didn't like to think of that time. It made his chest knot. He never wanted Sam to look like that again. He wanted them to trust each other, like they'd done once. Before Earth.

"I know Ramirez's in a bad shape right now, but he's gonna pull through. Keller's gonna fix him up." John looked at her, his brows slightly furrowed. "People've pulled through worse."  _He_  sure had. From the files he'd read, he knew Sam had too.

"I know that," Sam said, staring at the horizon. Annoyance flashed in her eyes; her hands clenched. " _Someone's_ ass is gonna be kicked for this." She left it at that, but John understood.

"You think Radim had something to do with Taron's mission?"

With a sigh, Sam's annoyance seemed to wither. "I'm not sure. He's been open enough when I've seen him, and very accommodating regarding our need for special supplies. I've got the impression, though, that he's got some internal issues."

"Who doesn't?" John grimaced. Because of the ways things had turned out here on Atlantis, he felt like he had to look over his shoulder wherever he went. Especially after Dawkins was assigned as his 2IC. "I take it someone's not happy about our agreement?"

Sam's expression darkened. "No, not at all. I think the Genii's chief security advisor has been against the alliance since Radim announced it." She paused, her eyes drifting down to the algae again.

Silence descended upon them again. John felt restless. It felt like he dealt with some kind of enemy, something that threatened Sam, but he was kept helpless on the sidelines.

"Sam," he said finally. After a long moment, she looked up at him. She seemed vulnerable all of a sudden. "Did something happen?"

"No," Sam said quickly, then hesitated and looked away. "Yes." She smiled, but it was humourless. "A lot of things have happened. Today, the past months, past year… It hit me when I visited the infirmary earlier to check on Ramirez and Reika. I…" She paused, a clear sheen suddenly in her eyes. "I never intended for any of this to happen."

"No commander does," reasoned John unperturbed, but for some reason he couldn't explain, his neck tensed. "You plan the op and execute it as close to success as possible. You can't predict when someone's gonna get hit or not, or when your ally's gonna turn on you. You just got to get back on your feet and face the next thing."

By the hesitation in Sam's expression, however, it didn't seem like it was simply today's mission that had her rattled. John watched her expression change into an amicable one and knew that, despite his efforts, she still didn't trust him with those inner secrets and thoughts of hers.

"You're right," Sam smiled tensely and straightened. "I guess it's just been a bad day. Long too, and I think I need a shower. It's like I can still smell that Wraith beast somewhere around here, but it's gotta be these clothes."

So that was how it was going to be. Well, he could play that game. He'd become somewhat of an expert.

John returned the smirk, equally tense. "I wasn't gonna say anything."

* * *

_Twenty-four hours later_

* * *

**DAY 238**

People ran up and down the corridors. John, overnight bag slung over one shoulder, stepped out of the transporter and frowned. Something had happened. Things didn't get crazy like this without reason.

He stopped one of the scientists, a woman with an SGC patch on her arm. "What's going on?"

The woman, however, didn't get a chance to answer. Above the noise of nearly frantic activity Xiaoyi's voice rung out. "Colonel Sheppard!"

She stood at the end of the corridor, next to the staircase that led up to the back of Atlantis's operations centre. If looks could kill, he'd be dead by now.

"In my office."

John, who was confused but wary, let go of the female scientist and wound his way through the crowd. A lot of them nearly jumped back to give him space, eyeing him and Xiaoyi almost frightfully. John's insides knotted.

"What the hell's going on?" he asked again as he reached Xiaoyi, but the woman merely turned on her heel and strode up the staircase. John had no choice but to follow, every step raising the hairs at the back of his neck.

The operations centre buzzed with activity, excitement and tension. John even thought he saw one of the technicians crying. He caught Chuck's eyes as he passed, the Canadian looking blank, like he was in shock. He opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out and John had no time to ask for answers.

Xiaoyi held the door open for him and closed it shut with energy that put John further on edge. The sounds of the operations centre silenced completely.

He eased his bag off his shoulder and put it down carefully, lest Xiaoyi would notice the odd metallic  _clink_ when the bag hit the ground. He'd come too far to be caught red-handed with contraband intended for Sam, like a wrench and a box of electrical wires and bolts, despite the fact that in this entire buzz people might not even care. Except maybe Major Dawkins, who would probably grin like a Cheshire cat.

"Am I gonna get some answers to what the hell's going on?" John asked for a third time, growing impatient and angry at Xiaoyi's continued icy silence.

The woman stood next to the clutter-free desk, simply staring at him. John was tempted to raise his eyebrows, eager to hurry things along.

Finally, she spoke. Her eyes glinted. "Let's cut this short, shall we? I've studied the Ancient database, Colonel, and I haven't found any evidence to support Carter's statement that there's carnivores on Tirana."

John frowned. Was  _this_  what all the buzz was about? "So? The Ancients haven't been to Tirana for generations. The database is hardly up-to-date."

"The Tikwee had also no knowledge of this," Xiaoyi countered.

Which Tikwee would that be? John wondered, still on edge. Tirana was a self-supplied and self-governed colony, mostly cut off from the home planet Tikwa and its leaders. Whatever went on there, the Administration didn't seem to care. That's what Master Togar had told him.

"With all due respect," John said, keeping his tone as neutral as possible. "The Administration doesn't know squat about their colonies. I'd be surprised if they knew the latest population tally."

"This information comes from Tirana, Colonel. I trust the source completely, and the source has never heard of any carnivores – nor of Colonel Carter's intention to hunt any of them down."

"There's a lot of people on that planet," John argued. "You can't expect Sam to tell everyone about her plans. Or do  _you_ happen to share your plans with everyone in this city?"

"I'm not the one on review here, Colonel," Xiaoyi retorted, her tone like steel and ice. Her eyes flashed with anger.

"We've got an injured man down in the infirmary who might never use his leg to its full extent again," John continued, growing frustrated. What did all this have to do with the emotional people outside that wooden door? And what the hell did she mean about  _'review'_? "Sam wouldn't lie about things like that."

"Are you  _sure_ of that?" Xiaoyi asked abruptly. When John didn't immediately answer, she continued in a lower, icier voice. "I think there are things Colonel Carter has kept from everyone else. Some truths that she thinks are better left unsaid. I think you know some of them."

"Like what?" John countered for appearance's sake. Truthfully, he  _did_  know some of those secrets Sam had left unsaid. He wasn't about to tell  _this_  particular woman about them, however. But he didn't like the way Xiaoyi looked at him.

"I think you'd better come with me, Colonel," she said after a moment's pause. "There's something you should see." She stalked past him and flung the door open.

With the barest look at his bag, John picked it up and brought it along as he followed Xiaoyi into the bustling operations centre.

"Mr Shang," Xiaoyi called out, and the bustle halted momentarily. Everyone looked at the two of them, some stoic, some grinning, some crying. "Put it up on the screen."

The Chinese gate technician in question gave John the barest of dark looks, then ran his hands across his keyboard. The wall-mounted screen activated and everyone's eyes went towards it. John frowned at their fixated stares, his neck tense and his stomach knotted. Slowly, he turned to face the screen.

It was a map of the galaxy or, to be more precise, the closest border of the galaxy in range. It was as far as Atlantis's improved long-range sensors could reach. Several planets were lit up along with the binary code names assigned to them by Atlantis crew.

Xiaoyi turned to him, anger glinting in her eyes. "Do you see, Colonel, what she has kept from us?"

John's jaw clenched.

Next to a planet named M2X-914, a white beacon was highlighted. Its name read  _Sun-Tzu_. It was supposed to be gone.

* * *

  
**Next:**  "We don't know."

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Outpost Alpha = a planet Sam uses to rendezvous with allies so as to keep the location of Tirana and Atlantis safe.


	18. DAY 238

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When the Sun Tzu is discovered on the edge of the Pegasus galaxy, hopes are high that there will finally be answers about what happened to Earth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Some swearing, dark themes, dark imagery, character death. Read at your own risk.

 

 

 

* * *

**SEVENTEEN | "We don't know."**

_Prompt: A time to seek  
_ _Music: "I Was Lost Without You", Sam Hulick, Mass Effect 3 soundtrack_

* * *

**DAY 238**

John wanted to warn her, but there was no time. He stood deathly still in the Operations Centre as the stargate connection was cut and Xiaoyi stepped towards the balcony railing in the sudden silence.

"Colonel Carter," Xiaoyi said, her tone mechanical. Next to her, Coolidge sneered and glared down at Sam. John felt his hand fist in response. "Would you join us in my office, please?"

Down in the gate room, a tired-looking Sam glanced around at the people who had converged there and seemed confused as she eyed the assortment of security and medical personnel, all frozen in the midst of obvious preparation. "What's happened?"

Xiaoyi didn't give her the pleasure of an explanation. Having spent the whole day so far within spitting distance of her, John hadn't expected one. The woman was on the prowl.

"My office," Xiaoyi said, her voice hardened. "Now."

Sam looked up at her, a shadow crossing her face. Her commander's mask was finally up, and her eyes had regained a certain spark. As Xiaoyi turned on her heel and walked towards her office, followed by a skulking Coolidge, Sam's eyes found John and he held them as she ascended the stairs.

"It's the  _Sun Tzu,"_  he said quickly as Sam reached him. "Atlantis picked up their emergency beacon outside M2X-914 two hours ago.  _Daedalus_ is checking it out."

Sam's eyes widened and she stopped. "That's impossible. They said—"

"Colonel," Xiaoyi said sharply. She had stopped outside the glass office and stared at Sam icily. It was clearly a warning.

Sam's jaw tightened and she glanced at John. "Thanks for the heads-up," she muttered. "We'll talk later."

John nodded, but as Sam walked away and entered the glass office ahead of Xiaoyi, his neck was tense as a wire. Like an itch that couldn't be scratched. It'd been there since their talk yesterday at the pier. Seeing her again brought it all back.

"Colonel Sheppard." Xiaoyi now stared at him. "Notify me the second  _Daedalus_ checks in."

John forced down an urge to clench his fists as the wooden door closed behind her. She'd been on his back ever since the  _Sun Tzu's_ emergency beaconhad shown up on the sensors, like  _he_  had something to do with it. The very idea put him on edge.

He glanced around the Operations Centre, wondering what to do next. The pandemonium that had raged before Sam dialled in from Tirana had been quenched somewhat. Now it seemed people walked on eggshells, tiptoeing around each other to finish their preparations and glancing nervously at the glass office with its blinds closed, and even at him _._

 _Waiting for the other shoe to drop,_ John reasoned, but the thought didn't sit well with him. There never should have been another shoe in the first place. A dead ship should either have stayed dead or never have been labelled KIA. Instead, the game had changed and this whole thing was a potential FUBAR.

John didn't want to go through one of those again. The last time had cost them too much. If Sam got trapped in Xiaoyi's politics again, they'd lose the edge they'd painstakingly gained against the Wraith. Or at least suffer a setback of an indeterminable length.

Either way, John had so far today seen enough to know that this situation with the  _Sun Tzu_ could and would make people lose their focus. He just hoped that Sam wouldn't be completely sidetracked by all this. They needed her now, more than ever…despite the insistent nagging at the back of his mind that Xiaoyi might be right.

He  _did_  know something that others didn't. And it had nothing to do with Sam's black ops missions or the Wraith. It was about Earth.

* * *

"You must be joking," Coolidge said. His eyes had narrowed dangerously.

"I wouldn't joke about this," Sam said through gritted teeth, reminding herself to keep her hands unclenched. The man had changed over the past months, and not for the better. She gave Xiaoyi a hard stare. "Homeworld Command told us the  _Sun Tzu_ and the  _Apollo_ were destroyed outside Saturn by an unknown alien force. You must've seen the video logs. They didn't even have time to react."

"Then how do you explain the fact that the  _Sun Tzu_ has found its way to the Pegasus galaxy?" Xiaoyi's expression was cut in stone.

"A miracle?" Sam raised an eyebrow. "If that  _is_ the real  _Sun Tzu._ The  _Daedalus_ haven't reported back yet to confirm the emergency beacon, have they?"

"Humour me, Colonel," said Xiaoyi, her lips thinned.

Sam held back a sigh. "I can't explain it. I don't have all the facts. None of us do. All I know is what Homeworld Command told me. On Christmas Eve, the entire Milky Way stargate network shut down. The day after, an unknown alien force appeared on the edge of the Sol system. The  _Sun Tzu_ and the  _Apollo_ intercepted the aliens outside Saturn, where they were attacked before being able to attempt contact. According to Colonel Ellis's last message, the alien ships were massive and packed a lot of firepower. They didn't stand a chance. That's why Homeworld Command ordered the retreat and evacuation to Atlantis. Preventive measures in case things went south."

"If the stargate network was down, how was this even possible?" asked Xiaoyi, even though she must have known the answer if she'd read through the logs like John had reported months ago. But she wanted to hear it from Sam's own mouth, for what good that would do.

"Thanks to the SGC's special dialling computer, the Earth stargate wasn't entirely affected by the network shutdown," Sam said. "They managed to stop the virus that caused the shutdown before it could gain a foothold in the computers. Once they'd purged the systems of the virus, they brought the stargate back online, but they were unable to dial the Milky Way stargates. That, apparently, made someone suggest trying to force a dial to the Pegasus network."

"Where did the virus originate?"

"Unknown," said Sam. "The SGC didn't send any data on the virus, so I can't tell if it was similar to the Goa'uld virus that shut down the stargate network years ago, or something else entirely."

"How can you  _not_ know?" Coolidge asked abruptly. He took a step forward, his pale and drawn face twisted in a grimace. "You were in their pockets, Colonel. You knew them inside-out. Friends of yours, most of them, weren't they?"

Something twisted inside Sam. Her tone trembled for a heartbeat as she replied, "Yes, most of them. But it's the truth. I wouldn't lie about something like this."

Xiaoyi smiled humourlessly, as if Sam's statement had rung a bell somewhere. "Perhaps not, Colonel, but nevertheless, there are many questions that need answers."

"I can't give you what I don't know," Sam said, her voice a little heated. This was simply ridiculous. Only politicians would go on a holy crusade to deal with an emergency. "Maybe I should be asking you the same thing? You were there."

Apparently, Xiaoyi didn't like it when the tables were turned. "We did not have the  _privilege_  of being close, personal friends with the head of Homeworld Command."

 _Of course not_ , Sam thought, ignoring the low blow from Xiaoyi. General O'Neill didn't normally get along with any of the IOA representatives. 'Those egotistical, self-centred bastards', he'd called most of them. Except Woolsey, which was why O'Neil had pushed for the latter when Sam was temporarily replaced as commander of Atlantis almost two years ago.

Reminded of him, Sam recalled the face of General O'Neill on the wall-mounted screen in the Operations Centre eight months ago. Her insides clenched as she took a deep breath and looked up at the two IOA representatives.

"Look," Sam said. "You were there when General O'Neill's message came in. I remember that. You must have heard the same thing I did. Earth couldn't win that fight. Half our fleet was destroyed within minutes, the rest of them on missions elsewhere, and the stargate network was down. The Ancient defence platform in Antarctica managed to take down one of the smaller alien ships, but then it was destroyed. The SGC was next, so they blew themselves up to stop the aliens from reaching Atlantis. They saved us."

"A grim decision," Xiaoyi said, unaffected. It was like Sam couldn't even dent the woman's armour. "But that is not the issue here. The  _Sun Tzu_ is here now, which I'd say greatly contradicts your story." And in turn opened up for the possibility that something else might be untrue, but that was left unsaid.

"Well, I've told you what I know," Sam said and crossed her arms, fingers clenched around opposite arms. Her tone bordered on insubordinate. She'd noticed how Xiaoyi claimed it was 'her' story, not Homeworld Command's. "Perhaps you should check again with the logs, or interview the  _Daedalus_ crew. Though, I doubt you'll hear a different story."

Especially since the  _Daedalus_ had left a few days earlier with much needed supplies and a spare ZPM for Atlantis's defence against the oncoming Wraith superhive. Caldwell knew what she knew. For the past eight months, they'd compared notes and reached the same conclusion every time: they didn't know enough. The key pieces were missing, like who the aliens were, where they came from, what happened to the Milky Way stargate network, and the most important question on everyone's minds:  _why Earth_?

"You seem  _very_  sure of that," said Coolidge, taking another step closer. She could almost feel his breath upon her skin. "Tampering with the truth is still a crime, Colonel."

Sam nearly bristled. "I'm not—"

"Then how do you explain your three late-night calls to Homeworld Command in the week prior to the attack?" Xiaoyi picked up the topmost paper in her stack of folders and handed it to Sam. "Private communiqués with General O'Neill?"

Reading the paper in her hand, Sam's jaw tightened. "Those calls are classified."

"Not anymore, Colonel. You  _will_ tell me what you discussed. Was it about Earth? Did you know that we were going to be attacked?"

" _No_." Sam crossed her arms tightly, her eyes glinting dangerously. Still, Xiaoyi remained calm and at the edge of her seat – as if she'd waited for this for a long time and things were finally coming to light. Was that the reason she'd gone through Sam's files all those months ago? To find proof? "I had no idea," Sam continued. "Neither did Homeworld Command. That's why we're in this situation. Because we got clusterfucked."

Coolidge's face twisted in an ugly grimace. "Then what, pray tell,  _did_  you talk about, Colonel? Pillow talk?"

Sam's cheeks heated and she struggled to keep calm. Xiaoyi's lips twitched in a triumphant smirk.

"We discussed the Wraith," Sam said finally through gritted teeth. She completely ignored Coolidge, meeting instead Xiaoyi's eyes. "Atlantis had picked up the superhive on our long-range sensors and we knew they were coming for us. With the  _Daedalus_ back on Earth for resupply, we talked about possible strategies."

"Excuse me if I find it difficult to believe you, Colonel," Xiaoyi said, calmly leaning back in her chair. Sam's eyes narrowed. "I do not trust people who lie to my face."

Sam snorted and rolled her eyes. She shot both Coolidge and Xiaoyi a second, wry look. "That makes two of us,  _ma'am._ "

"You  _damn_ —"

Coolidge surged forward, a growl coming from the back of his throat, but rather than back down, Sam met him halfway, towering half-a-head over him.

" _Try it_ ," she muttered, hard eyes locked with his. Her hands had fisted on her sides, ready to pounce if necessary. Coolidge didn't move, his eyes fiery and his whole body trembling in anger. Sam's lips thinned as she flexed her muscles. "And  _this time_ , look me in the face."

Coolidge flinched, and his eyes skirted towards the wooden door. The reference wasn't lost on him.

"That's  _enough_ , Colonel." Xiaoyi rose to her feet, her tone like steel. "Stand down or I'll have you removed to a cell."

Sam gave her a heated look, but remained where she was. "If that's the real _Sun Tzu_ out there, you'll need me."

Xiaoyi's eyes narrowed. "Hardly. There are plenty of competent people in this city, Colonel. You're not irreplaceable."

Anger flashed through her veins, and Sam opened her mouth to speak—

The wooden door swung open without a knock. John appeared in the doorway, his expression grim as he noticed the tension between Sam, Xiaoyi and Coolidge. Their eyes locked for a moment before John turned to Xiaoyi, but Sam already had a sinking, sobering feeling in the pit of her stomach.

" _Daedalus_ just checked in. It's the  _Sun Tzu."_

* * *

M2X-914 had once been a lush, humid forest planet home to a number of dinosaur-sized carnivores. At least, that is what the Atlantis database claimed. Whatever had attracted the Ancients to establish an outpost here more than 13,000 years ago was undoubtedly gone now, along with the outpost itself. Only the stargate had survived, seeing as it orbited the planet as a spacegate.

Staring out of the Jumper's windows as it descended through the atmosphere, McKay saw nothing but barren rock and ice as far as the eye could see. There was no humidity and temperatures were well below -40 degrees Celsius. It was a giant arctic desert, much like Earth's poles without the global warming. But at least there was air and some sunlight. And they were all dressed in warm clothes. Small favours.

"Can't really imagine someone's lived here once. Chilling." Major Dawkins sat in the front passenger seat, his eyes scouring the ground below them as the Jumper reached the biosphere and evened out to follow the terrain. His tone seemed light, but McKay thought he detected a certain nervousness in his voice. Maybe because this was his first stint in the field, or so Sheppard had told him.

"Kinda reminds me of Hoth," said Captain Vega, who navigated the helm.

Seated behind her, Sergeant Mehra didn't seem amused. "Kinda reminds me of Antarctica."

McKay didn't chip in, even if he could think of a hundred things to say. It just seemed pointless at the moment. His eyes were drawn instead to the Jumper's console when an alert flashed on its HUD.

"We're coming up on the crash site," said Vega. The atmosphere tensed at her words. From the compartment behind them, Major Teldy came to stand next to McKay's chair, the nozzle of her P90 digging a little into his shoulder. "Should get a visual very soon."

McKay scooted to the edge of his seat, trying to stare over Major Dawkins's shoulder. Far up ahead on the horizon, he saw black smoke rising from the icy ground. That had to be it.  _Daedalus_ said the ship had crash-landed, but as they covered the distance McKay could see debris everywhere on the ground. A huge chunk looked mysteriously like a major part of the ship's hangar. It had to have crashed more than it landed.

"Oh my god," Major Teldy said, almost a whisper. Needless to say, it was an understatement.

If they didn't have the IFF signal to go after, McKay would have found it hard to believe that the smoking, blackened twisted metal colossus on the bottom of a crater was the  _Sun Tzu_. Both its hangars were missing by the looks of it, and the front part was buried in the crater like folded metal. Only the back end of the ship seemed more or less intact. At least the parts he could see above ground.

No one said a word as the Jumper made another pass, surveying the damage. McKay thought he heard someone sniffle at the back of the Jumper, but when he looked there were only expressions of disbelief, shock and stoic grit.

Something clenched in his stomach as McKay looked back at the remainder of the  _Sun Tzu._ Its blackened hull looked scorched in places as if from enemy fire, and there were some huge gaps where something had punched through – either in the crash or before as the ship went through the meteoroid field surrounding the planet. He wondered what kind of story was behind it.

"Okay," Dawkins said finally, his voice shaky. His features were slightly pale as he looked over his shoulder. "Let's get down and start the search."

* * *

The city buzzed, like something had stirred the hornet's nest. Reese saw it everywhere as she headed down the Atlantis corridors. People were tense, nervous, and some even clumsier than usual. A scientist Reese didn't know tripped as he practically pelted down the corridor, but when she went to help him up, the guy didn't seem to know she was there. He only jumped to his feet and ran again, muttering beneath his breath.

Reese frowned. Something was up. The barracks she stayed at had almost emptied completely by the time she got back from a late breakfast, a rare sight when most of the inhabitants had Saturday mornings off.

She spotted a familiar face in the crowd. "Hey, Kerrick!"

Eileen Kerrick, the combat engineer who'd been attached to Reese's team in the past, turned around and waved. She nodded towards the people bustling around them as Reese stepped up to her. "Crazy, right?"

"You know what's going on?"

Kerrick raised an eyebrow. "You mean you don't? They found the  _Sun Tzu._ Can you fucking believe it?It crash-landed on some planet  _here._  In Pegasus."

Reese's breath halted. " _What_? But…it was destroyed."

"That's been the story all along, hasn't it? Turns out it didn't." Kerrick grinned almost like the Cheshire cat. "Damn, they'll have some fucking story to tell. I hope they kicked some alien ass."

"Clear the way!" someone yelled down the corridor.

Reese looked back and quickly shuffled against the wall, colliding with Kerrick's shoulder, as a whole squad of combat-clad medics rushed past, empty gurneys clattering between them. All along the corridor, the other Atlantis personnel that had been milling about did the same. They remained frozen in place until the medics disappeared around a corner, still shouting for people to make a hole. Rushing medics was never a good sign.

"I'm gonna head up and see what's going on," said Kerrick, already turned to head back into the buzzing crowd. "You wanna come?"

Reese thought about it, then shook her head. Things would be chaotic enough without her getting in the way to get her gossip fix. "No, you go. I was gonna visit Ramirez. Let me know what you hear, okay?"

"Sure."

* * *

Sixty-four transponders. That's what  _Daedalus_ could pick up on its sensors. Three of them had been located in space, trapped inside the meteoroid field that surrounded M2X-914, through which the  _Sun Tzu_ had obviously torn, at great cost to its hull integrity. Those were the bodies  _Daedalus_ was able to beam up, as the meteoroid field prevented them from getting closer to the planet without serious injury. The rest were left for the Atlantis rescue operation. Still, sixty-four out of an original two-hundred crew. What the hell had happened to them?

John stood outside the Operations Centre, listening to the information flitting back and forth between Atlantis and Major Dawkins on M2X-914.

"How many life signs does the Jumper's sensors pick up?" asked Xiaoyi, her tone neutral, her features void of any emotion.

" _About eighteen,"_  said Dawkins.  _"Mostly located near the engineering section. Dr McKay believes the front of the ship took most of the force upon impact. We're trying to cut a way in to them now. Most of the interior structure has collapsed."_

"Very well." Xiaoyi's lips thinned, her arms crossed tightly. "Do you need reinforcements?"

" _Daedalus are sending us additional engineers to help, but we'll also need radiation suits. It seems one of the ship's naquadah generators is leaking radiation."_

"I will send a Jumper to assist you immediately," Xiaoyi said. She looked around until she met John's eyes, then gave him a meaningful stare.

John got the message. He pushed off the wall he'd leaned against and cued on his radio as Xiaoyi's and Dawkins's conversation continued in the background. "Dr Kusanagi, this is Colonel Sheppard."

" _Yes, Colonel?"_ Miko's response was swift.

"Round up all the radiation suits we have in storage and bring them to Jumper Five. I'll send some guys down to help you."

Miko responded affirmatively and logged off. John made another call for Major Lorne, who dispatched some of his men to help out the scientist. In the meantime, Xiaoyi's conversation with Dawkins had come to an end and the woman turned towards him again.

"The suits are on the way," said John, pushing his hands into his pants pockets. "They'll ship out in Jumper Five."

"Inform Dr Keller that some of the wounded will most likely suffer from radiation poisoning," said Xiaoyi tonelessly. John thought her eyes seemed shinier than usual, but the rest of her was tense and severe. "I realise Atlantis is not equipped for this scenario, but please tell her to do what she can."

John nodded grimly. Essentially, Xiaoyi told Keller to ease their passing. At least she realised when some things could not be done. John supposed that he shouldn't be surprised she managed to keep some of her objectivity, and yet… These were her people. She might even know some of them. But so far he hadn't seen even a dent in the woman's armour.

"I'll let her know."

* * *

There were bodies blocking their path. Alicia Vega felt nausea well up in her as the coppery scent of blood and burnt flesh hit her. In a heap of dark jumpsuits, blackened faces and debris, what appeared to be two bodies were trapped underneath broken metal beams. A hand was sticking up, missing two fingers. The blood had stopped running.

Someone behind her couldn't keep it in. Alicia blocked out the sound of retching as she pulled her bandana up to cover her nose and mouth. Along with Dusty Mehra and a couple of combat engineers, she stepped forward and started picking up the debris blocking the doorway.

It was like they were in some sort of horror movie. Emergency lighting flickered on and off around them, and a thick odour of smoke from some previously burning circuits made her throat clench. She reminded herself to breathe through her mouth.

"Watch that beam," one of the combat engineers said, pointing at the intended target to Alicia's left. "Try not to move it. It's supporting what's left of this ceiling. We'll have to reinforce it before we move on."

Alicia kept an eye on the beam as she continued to move away debris, handing it to Dusty who moved it out of the way. The combat engineers tried to work around them, finding broken support beams elsewhere to reinforce the doorway and make it safe to reach the two bodies buried on the other side.

"This is crazy," muttered Dusty at one point as Alicia handed her what seemed like a piece of a wall panel. The sergeant eyed the hand sticking up ahead of them.

Alicia didn't have any response. Dusty was right, after all. This was crazy. Alicia hadn't seen anything similar unless she counted Bosnia, but that had been at a distance and only through the sights of her sniper rifle. This was up close and personal.

She'd never done grunt work like this, but the situation called for all hands available. The ship was huge and the damage massive. They had a lot of ground to cover to get to those few life signs that the Ancient device Allison operated could still detect.

"Okay, that should do the trick." The combat engineers stepped back from their handiwork, and one of them looked at the bodies still wrapped in debris beyond the entrance. "Let's get them out of here."

Alicia steeled herself. This wouldn't be pretty.

* * *

"Jack did what he thought was right," Daniel said, his voice low.

Sam sighed and stared out the window at the ocean lapping against the piers of Atlantis. "I know. It's just…"

"You don't know what to believe now that it turns out the  _Sun Tzu_ survived after all." Daniel looked at her and smiled sadly.

"Yes," Sam said. The fighting spirit she'd felt in Xiaoyi's office earlier was gone. Now she only felt incredibly tired. There were so many things going on already without this situation with the  _Sun Tzu_ added to the mix. She stared at what was left of her sandwich, which had been forgotten during the course of their conversation. "Who'd have thought they survived?"

"From what you've told me, it sounds like a miracle." Daniel picked up his cup of tea and sipped it carefully. His eyes drifted to the oceanic scenery outside the windows of the Little Chow. Seeing as he'd been unconscious at the time of the evacuation, he'd only heard what happened to Earth afterwards.

"It is," Sam said. "It must be. I mean, if Earth couldn't…" She drew a sharp breath and paused. Once she felt sufficiently in control, she continued. "If Earth couldn't fend off those aliens, whoever they are, how the hell did the  _Sun Tzu_ pull it off?"

Daniel shrugged. "You'll have to ask  _them_ that. But…" He paused and met Sam's eyes above the rim of his teacup. "…I don't think Jack or General Landry lied to us." He took her hand and squeezed it. "Don't let Xiaoyi or Coolidge get to you."

Sam smiled as she recalled the meeting in Xiaoyi's office earlier. "They're certainly putting a lot of effort into trying." But her smile faltered when Daniel raised an eyebrow. Sam sighed. "It's just… I never imagined there'd be a day like this. Maybe eight months ago when we didn't know what had happened to the  _General Hammond_ , but once we announced them MIA, I moved on. Now… I don't know what to believe. What if they're trapped somewhere in the Milky Way, or also on their way to Pegasus?"

"Maybe the survivors can answer  _that_ question too," Daniel said, giving her hand another squeeze and letting go to finish his tea.

"They've got a tall order," Sam said, thinking of the questions that were bound to come from all corners of the city; questions that had been nurtured for eight months. There wouldn't be answers to everyone.

Sam swirled her now cold cup of coffee, then glanced around the Little Chow. It was nearly empty save for her and Daniel. She wondered where the regulars hung out now. Nearly eight hundred people in this city and they were the only ones here.

Movement in the doorway drew Sam's attention. John had stepped inside and looked around, eyes narrowed. Once he'd spotted them, he headed off in their direction. He looked like hell.

"Hey," Sam said, her voice half-muted. John slumped down in a chair next to their table. "Captain Matthews told me you found survivors."

"Yeah… The first batch came in just now," said John, his features grim. "They're being decontaminated."

"How many?" Daniel asked quietly.

John's jaw tightened. "Sixteen total. Two died before the rescue teams could reach them. The rest are critical. Most have radiation poisoning."

Sam's insides clenched and she could see a shadow cross Daniel's face. They both knew what that meant. They'd been there. But this time Oma Desala wasn't around. There'd be more graves out on the mainland.

Sam noticed John's hands had fisted at his sides. She wanted to reach out to him, but the tension in his eyes when he looked at her stayed her hand. Instead, she looked awkwardly at Daniel as the silence dragged out. Words seemed to fail. This whole situation was unreal.

"Who wants coffee?" said Daniel eventually, and pushed back his chair. Sam held up her half-filled cup, nodding her thanks. "John? It's fresh. Sort of."

"Uh, no thanks. I'm good." John seemed startled out of some reverie, breaking down his defences for a moment. It was enough of a drop that once Daniel left with his and Sam's cups, Sam noticed a dark cloud settle back over John's face.

"What's wrong?" Sam asked, her neck tense. She knew Major Dawkins had been sent to M2X-914 instead of John on Xiaoyi's orders. It would've been a slap in his face. He might even blame her for that. She'd put Xiaoyi in a terrible mood.

"There were only sixty-four transponders," said John. He dug his trusted golf ball out of a pants pocket and began to fiddle with it. "I wonder what happened to the rest."

"Oh." Sam hadn't expected that. Hell, she didn't know exactly what she'd expected. Her mind worked on a different track today. After this morning, she felt defensive. "Well, I don't know. We'll have to ask the survivors."

John looked at her, his dark eyes indiscernible. "I guess so."

Something about his tone made Sam look back at him, frowning, but John withdrew his gaze to the oceanic view outside the windows. She tensed and opened her mouth to ask—

"Here you go." Daniel put down a steaming cup of coffee in front of her. It seemed to be the cue for John to stand up.

"I gotta go," John said, putting his golf ball back in his pocket. "I'll see you guys later." And then he was gone.

Sam stared after him, a nagging feeling creeping up her spine.

"What was that about?" Daniel asked.

"I don't know." Sam tried to shrug off the sense of foreboding as she met Daniel's eyes across the table. "But I think I need to find out."

* * *

"Rodney, didn't you hear the Major's order?" Zelenka's voice sounded inside the radiation suit's headpiece. The man's accompanying legs were barely visible from McKay's position under the console. "There are no more survivors. We're moving out."

"Yeah, yeah, I heard it." McKay grimaced when the tangle of wires above of him sparked. "I'm kinda busy at the moment, though. I'll get one of the Jumpers to wait for me."

Zelenka tried to look underneath the console, but his large bulky radiation suit prevented him from a clear view. "What are you doing?"

McKay successfully extracted the wire he'd been looking for and quickly inserted it into his tablet. "I'm trying to download the ship's computer logs. See what they've been up to for the past eight months. Sort of like a black box."

"You think you can salvage anything from _this_?" Zelenka sounded dubious, probably as he took a glance around their surroundings. The  _Sun Tzu's_  engineering deck was pretty much in shambles and most of the consoles and control panels had been smashed upon impact. "I'd put my money on the survivors telling us more."

"If they live that long," McKay said, pushing back the images that'd met him once they managed to open a way into to the engine room. It only made him nauseous. The radiation leaking from the generators and the crash-landing had looked to be the least of their worries. It'd seemed like they'd been on this ship for a  _long_  time.

Zelenka made a noise that might've been a sad agreement. McKay could hear him move off, pushing debris away from his path.

"Look," McKay said, "I could do this a lot faster if you helped me. Then we could get back to the city and try to solve this puzzle. Not to mention getting some food and coffee. I'm starving."

It didn't take long for Zelenka to respond with a sigh. "Alright, Rodney. What do you need?"

* * *

Reese didn't know what to say when the wounded started coming in through the door to the infirmary. She sat still by Ramirez's bedside, counting and watching as jumpsuit-clad and naked Asians were moved to beds and gurneys. Some were even taken to the surgery right away. Others were only rushed past the entrance door to a separate decontamination and treatment room - radiation victims. She'd known they were coming, but still…

This was too surreal.

"Can't a guy get some sleep around here?" Ramirez's eyes opened tiredly. He sounded sluggish, but it was probably the drugs talking. Keller had put him on some pretty strong painkillers.

"You've already slept a whole day, Ramirez." Reese smirked in spite of herself.

"Cap'n?" The sergeant blinked his eyes at her, not quite managing to focus. He was either surprised to see her or just disoriented. Probably both.

"I'm here, Sergeant," Reese said. She found his hand and squeezed it, her insides clenched tight for a moment. Yesterday had been the scariest mission she'd done since Sanders died. She'd almost forgotten about it with everything else going on. "How do you feel?"

"Like someone decided I'm today's special," Ramirez said, smirking in what Reese clearly recognised as a drugged way – he never smiled like that when sober. But at least he remembered something.

"More like yesterday's," Reese chuckled, but stopped when she heard the abrupt noise of a flatlining heart monitor.

Ramirez heard it too and glanced around, noticing the flurry of motions around them. His words came out more clearly now. "Seriously, what's going on, Cap'n?"

From the next room, Keller came rushing out to the bed with the flatlined patient. She quickly took control, checking the  _Sun Tzu_ crewmember and rattling off orders to the nurses and doctors around her. Soon, she'd started CPR. That's when Reese noticed the extensive burns on the crewmember's body.

"Get me a crash cart!" Keller's voice split through the rising noise of the infirmary. She didn't stop the CPR, even as blood covered her gloved hands when her motions peeled the patient's burnt skin off.

Nauseated, Reese stood up and drew the curtain around Ramirez's bed. They didn't need to see this. Once she'd sat down, the commotion continuing outside their little corner, she gave him a grim look.

"They found the  _Sun Tzu_ today," Reese said lowly. "It crashed on a planet here in the Pegasus galaxy. Somehow it survived the attack on Earth and the past eight months, and came here. No one knows how, but I'm sure they're trying to work that out."

Ramirez's own expression shifted between confusion and a mirror of Reese's grimness. For a long while, he didn't say anything. Probably taking it all in, as well as listening to the flatlined heart monitor and Keller's continued instructions. They could hear the charge load up on the crash cart, and then the heart monitor would stop for a fraction of a section before its long beep returned and Keller gave new instructions.

Finally, he looked at her. "How're you taking it, Cap'n?"

"Me? I—I…" Reese didn't know what to say. She'd been taken off guard. She'd expected questions, but not…that one. "I'm fine."

By the look in Ramirez's eyes, it was obvious he didn't believe her. Considering the many hours they'd spent in drunken company telling stories of Earth and sharing anecdotes of those they missed, she supposed maybe she shouldn't either.

"Really," Reese said, a bit stronger. This had to border on insubordination. Too bad he was confined to this bed and then weeks of physical therapy. She really didn't want to pity him right now. "I'm fine."

But when the heart monitor suddenly turned off and Keller called time of death, Reese didn't feel fine at all.

* * *

The infirmary was dimmed and silent save for the slow beeps of a nearby heart monitor. A couple of orderlies were cleaning the room, picking up discarded bandages from the floor and mopping up dried spots of blood.

Shen thought Dr Keller's preliminary reports had prepared her, but once she saw an orderly pick up the tattered and blood-spattered remains of a  _Sun Tzu_ jumpsuit, she froze.

Something clenched inside her. Like something dislodged and sent a painful shiver throughout her body, pinning her in place. Shen's heart skipped a beat, her breath lodged somewhere in the bottom of her throat. Even her eyes burned for a moment.

She counted five beds in this room, and she knew there were another seven in a restricted-access room across the hall that was reserved for the radiation victims. All hooked up to monitors that broke the tired lull of the early evening.

That wasn't nearly enough. They were too few.

Something low and guttural sounded at her side. Shen looked sideways, unsettled by the twisted grimace on James Coolidge's face. His hands fisted, his eyes burned, and he seemed to shake with unspeakable anger as he stared around the dimmed infirmary.

She had no words for him. No comfort. Today, he was on his own.

"Tag him and take him to the morgue." Keller's voice broke through her muddled mind.

The doctor exited the surgery, followed by two scrub nurses steering a blanket-covered gurney past them and out the door. Shen stared, noting the dips and lumps underneath the blanket. There was a person under there, she told herself. A human being. But for all she knew, it could've been anything else. Maybe a secret stash of watermelons.

"Ms Xiaoyi, Mr Coolidge." Keller sounded tired, resigned. She pulled her surgical cap off her head, causing her hair to fall down across her shoulders. There were dark circles under her eyes.

"Doctor. What's your situation?" Shen was amazed at the calm in her own voice.

"Well… We have currently twelve survivors, most of them on life support," Keller said, taking a cursory glance around the infirmary. "Four didn't make it, three of them on the table. That was the last of them." She gestured towards the open doorway where the scrub nurses had taken the gurney. She blew a breath and sighed. "It's a good thing the SGC sent us their medical equipment in the evacuation or we'd have to go completely rudimentary."

"How would you judge their chances?" Shen asked, her attention drawn to the closest bed. Its occupant – an emaciated Chinese woman – had woken up and looked at her with sunken, dull eyes. Shen pointedly looked away, an uneasy feeling settling in the pit of her stomach.

Keller's expression was grim. "Most of them won't make it," she said lowly. Coolidge made a sudden twitch at Shen's side. "Besides the radiation poisoning and their injuries from the crash, for which I can only ease their pain, they're all dehydrated and suffering from starvation, which makes recovery difficult."

" _Starvation_?" Shen asked, horrified.

"Yes," Keller said, her lips thinned in a grimace. "They must have been at that ship for a very long time. Either that, or they've been held in captivity. I can't confirm either way since any signs of abuse associated with captivity would be hidden underneath their current injuries. I'd have to do further examinations, but they need to get strong enough first."

Shen looked at the female  _Sun Tzu_  patient again. Thin, bony fingers reached for her. Only three on one hand. The other arm was gone, amputated. There was a silent request in the woman's sunken eyes.

_Please…_

"Just to make this clear, Doctor… You're saying—" Coolidge stopped himself, his voice shaking, his grimace twisted. "You're saying these people died, and will die, because they  _starved_?"

Keller met his eyes, frowning a little. "It's part of the reason, yes. Their bodies were already under a lot of stress before the crash due to the starvation. The fact that some have survived their injuries so far is close to a miracle, but I don't know how long their bodies will hold on. We'll have to take it day-by-day. " She looked at Shen, her tone resigned. "Also, I can't tell if it's the same for those who didn't make it past M2X-914 unless they're brought here for autopsies."

Shen didn't know what to say. Keller was in effect saying that some of these twelve, who'd already been cut down from sixteen, sixty-four and two hundred, might not make it through the night. Was this what the Americans called Murphy's Law?

A loud  _crash_ resounded in the tense silence.

"Goddamnit," Coolidge swore underneath his breath. He'd slammed a fist into a nearby table. Keller now eyed him worriedly, wide-awake. "Goddamnit!"

"James," Shen began, but Coolidge cut her off.

"No, I won't believe this." His eyes were wide and furious. "I  _won't_." He began to turn on his heel, but Shen gripped his upper arm tightly, holding him back.

"Where're you going?" Shen asked.

Coolidge wrenched out of her hold and glared at her. "To get some damned answers."

* * *

Sam found John on the balcony outside the Operations Centre. He stared stoically at the fiery red horizon where the sun was setting, his arms crossed, his mouth clamped down tightly. Like he was someplace else, not four feet away.

"Hey," Sam said, hesitant. John tilted his head towards her, acknowledging her, but otherwise remained silent. "Came to see the view?"

John's eyes went back to the red sunset, his arms loosening their grip a little. "No," he said eventually. "Just getting some air. It's been a rough couple of days."

"And months," Sam said wryly, trying her best to lighten the mood. John's smirk didn't quite reach his eyes.

"Yeah… That too." He continued to stare at the horizon, but let down his hands. Sam noticed they clenched into fists before they disappeared into his pants pockets.

So that was how it would be. They were back to square one. That's at least what it felt like. Sam didn't know where to start or what had caused this sudden – or was it sudden? – turn of events in their slowly returning friendship. Closest guess dealt with the  _Sun Tzu_ and today's incidents.

"I heard Rodney's working on decrypting the  _Sun Tzu's_ computer," Sam said, breaking the tense silence. "Or what he managed to download, at least. I got the feeling it wasn't easy over there."

"I wouldn't know," John said a little bitterly. "But I got the same feeling. Dawkins was pretty shaken up once he got back. He might even be human."

Sam managed only a courteous smirk. Inside, she felt like a large lump of ice was doing flip-flops in her stomach. "You're mad because you weren't there."

John glanced at her sideways, his eyebrows knitted together. "No."

Sam frowned. She'd been sure it had to be something like that. Dawkins had practically taken over John's job lately. "Then…what?"

John's jaw tightened and his eyes returned to the sunset. Sam stared at him, her own hands clenched at her sides. The tension thickened.

"John?"

"Yesterday, when you said you 'never intended for any of this to happen', I thought you were talking about Sgt Ramirez or Reika." John's dark irises shifted to stare at her. There was a fire in his eyes. " _Did_  you?"

Sam froze, her limbs stiff. A cold shiver ran down her spine. Time seemed to move slowly. She withdrew her eyes and stared at the fiery sunset, now touching the oceans and enveloping the sky and water with red tendrils.

"Yes and no." Her voice was quiet, solemn. She'd hoped he hadn't noticed. Yesterday had been an emotional day. She'd slipped. But there was no way she could play the ignorant card now. He'd see right through her.

"So you knew?" John's accusation stung. Of all the people on Atlantis, his was the support she needed the most right now.

"I didn't know the  _Sun Tzu_  survived. I believed what Homeworld Command told me." Sam sighed. "Including everything they said about the attack on Earth. That part's true. I don't know more about what happened to Earth than anyone else in this city."

"But?"

Sam met John's eyes. "I  _do_  know things that others don't. Classified information. Above your pay grade, even mine, but I was let in on it because we're all that's left."

John's eyes narrowed. He'd taken his hands out of his pockets and crossed his arms tightly again, the sunset forgotten. "Something to do with Earth?"

"No," Sam said, a bit forcefully. "It's…"

She drifted off, battling with herself. Caldwell had told her no one could know. Besides, Homeworld Command had given it the highest classification. Even experienced colonels like them weren't supposed to know.

But Sam knew this secret had cost her more than what happened to Earth. The evidence was right in front of her: John looked at her with suspicion, almost distrust, even after all her attempts lately to regain what they'd once had.

"It's about the  _Odyssey._ I can't tell you more than that," Sam said, her voice low. "But if you ever wondered why I burned the midnight oil before and after we lost Earth…that was it. Even with all that was going on here in Pegasus, I couldn't stop thinking about them. About their—" She snapped her mouth shut.

"So…they're alive?" John's expression hardened. "Does that mean the  _General Hammond_ —?"

"No," Sam said immediately. "Both ships are listed MIA for a reason. Homeworld Command lost contact with  _Odyssey_ weeks before the attack on Earth.  _General Hammond_  was supposed to follow  _Daedalus_ to Atlantis even if it wasn't completely finished, but with the alien attack I suspect they never made it past the atmosphere. I'm hoping the survivors from  _Sun Tzu_ can help answer that."

The tense silence returned. Sam was torn between desperate and sense of duty. Locked with John's eyes, she tried to convey all the honesty she could muster, hoping he'd understand or at least accept what she said to be true. She needed him if their subterfuge operations here in Pegasus were to succeed.

But John still looked suspicious, his eyes guarded. Sam bit her lip and withdrew her eyes. She looked at her hands. Maybe this wasn't professionally related at all. Maybe it was that big elephant in the room, which had only grown larger after they lost Earth. It was still here.

"Look," Sam said hesitantly. She met his eyes again. "When I said I never intended for any of this to happen, I… I meant a lot of things. Including…" Sam's cheeks flushed and, for a moment, she wanted to chicken out, but something made her keep her eyes trained on John. "Including you and me."

John's stony expression faltered. Awkwardness reared its giant head. Maybe he hadn't expected that. Sam shifted on her feet, wringing her hands. Heat filled her face.

"I kept you out of the loop for a lot of things," Sam said, embarrassed. "And…I pulled back when I shouldn't have." She paused, seeing the uneasy shift in John's posture as he once more looked back at the sunset. The elephant had joined them. "For what it's worth…I'm sorry."

John didn't immediately respond. The red beams from the sunset played across his features, making his uneasy expression more pronounced. If possible, he seemed tenser than before. He didn't meet her eyes.

Eventually, John spoke, but his tone was low, almost hesitant. "So all those late-night classified calls with Earth before Christmas?"

Sam didn't know what to feel. It wasn't exactly a declaration of forgiveness, but at least he seemed to be willing to listen. That had to count for something. But…she'd just wished that maybe…

Sam held back a sigh. Perhaps she'd done too much damage to him.

_Like Nancy._

"They weren't about Earth or the aliens or the impending stargate network shut-down," Sam said finally. She reached up to rub her eyes. Damn, she was tired. This drained her more than the morning meeting with the IOA. "But I know that's what Xiaoyi's believed all this time. It's why she's giving me a hard time. She's convinced herself and others that Homeworld Command knew about the attack and did nothing."

"That's bullshit," John said abruptly, and the conviction in his tone surprised Sam. She looked up at him, wide-eyed, and saw him staring back at her. "General O'Neill was a decent guy. I can't see him lying about what happened, even if it'd been a direct order. Not with so many lives on the line. The Ice Queen and her Goon just doesn't want to face the facts. Don't let them get to you."

Sam didn't know what to say. She opened her mouth several times, but no words came out. It was weird how Daniel had said the exact same thing earlier. Did John…?

She didn't have the time to finish that thought.

"Colonel Carter!" The call came as soon as the balcony doors opened. Sergeant Chuck Campbell rushed out, eyes wide in fright. "Colonel, you've gotta come quick. He's gone mental!"

"Who?" Sam frowned, her body tensing up.

"Coolidge." Chuck pointed to the door. "He's in the gate room, waving a gun. With a  _hostage_."

* * *

Sam was through the door before John could react. Leaving the pale and shaken Chuck behind, John hurried after her, his neck tense and his hand itching for a gun.

Inside, the central tower room was covered in reddish hues from the windows behind the stargate. It put everything into sharp contrast. Shadows played along the walls, floors and between the frozen people in the room.

Sam stopped at the top of the grand staircase and stared down into the gate room at Coolidge, her eyes hard. The man stood on the raised platform, a terrified-looking petite woman held in a tight headlock in front of him, a gun pointed at her temple. Three security guards had positioned themselves at his sides, their stun weapons aimed at him.

"Let Ms Brown go, Mr Coolidge." Sam's tone was like ice. The commander's mask was in place. John stopped three feet away from her, shifting his eyes between Sam and Coolidge. He felt an indescribable urge to pull her away – she was too exposed.

"Not until I have answers," Coolidge said, his voice sharp. He eyed the three security guards who'd inched forward, and took a step back.

 _Smart man,_ John thought. Coolidge knew that with his human shield, his back was his only weak spot. The security guards wouldn't risk endangering the hostage. He just needed to keep them in front of him.

"Answers to what?" Sam said equally, her arms left hanging at her sides. She took a step down the staircase, immediately gaining Coolidge's attention.

"You're not  _that_ big of a fool, Colonel." Coolidge sneered, pushing the gun nozzle tighter against the woman's – Brown's – temple. "You know  _exactly_ what I'm talking about. You've been hiding it for months."

"You'll have to spell it out for me." Sam's eyes glinted. She remained in her spot, probably to stop antagonising Coolidge.

"I want the truth about Earth," Coolidge said, his black beetle-like eyes narrowed. "About the aliens that attacked us, about the stargate network collapse, about  _everything_  you've kept secret from us."

"I've already told you what I believed – what we  _all_ believed – is the truth," Sam said. "Unknown aliens attacked us, attacked  _Earth_ , and they took down all of our defences in less than half a day. They decimated half our fleet, the Ancient defence platform in Antarctica, and they were headed for the SGC and Earth's stargate when General Landry gave the order to self-destruct in order to stop the aliens from finding the way to Pegasus and Atlantis."

"But they  _lied_!" Coolidge snarled. Brown whimpered in his tight grip, her cheeks puffed red and streaked with tears. Coolidge didn't even look at her. "Homeworld Command said  _Sun Tzu_ was destroyed, but now we've got proof they didn't. What's to say they haven't lied about  _everything_?"

Sam didn't respond immediately. Her features were hard and tense. John took the moment to edge closer to her, his eyes trained on Coolidge in case the man decided Brown wasn't his desired target after all. He really wanted a gun right now. At least that'd stop him from feeling completely naked and bare. And he wouldn't mind seeing the IOA bastard's head in the middle of his crosshairs.

"It's possible," said Sam finally, her tone a bit softer. John glanced sideways at her, tense, but Sam's posture was still straight and uncompromising. "Our information is based on what Homeworld Command told us, as well as video and sensor logs from the  _Apollo_ before it was destroyed, but we can't deny that some things don't make sense." Sam took a couple of steps down the staircase, stopping when Coolidge visibly tensed up. "But  _something_ happened, Mr Coolidge. The  _Sun Tzu_ is evidence of that. They've seen combat. Whatever happened eight months ago, we'll get to the bottom of it. This," she nodded towards the crying scientist in Coolidge's headlock, "is unnecessary."

"I'm not a fool, Colonel." Coolidge's lips thinned. Whatever hairs he had left on his head seemed to rise in anger. He pulled Brown back a few steps more. "I don't want to hurt Ms Brown, but if it means we'll finally get some answers…" He left the rest unsaid.

Sam's jaw tightened. "I told you earlier, Mr Coolidge: I don't have the answers you're looking for. The only ones who can shed some light on what really happened eight months ago are down in the infirmary."

"They won't make it," Coolidge said.

The atmosphere in the gate room tensed. In the Operations Centre, the gate technicians glanced between each other, their faces pale and scared. Brown let out a heart-wrenching sob, the gun digging into her skin. Next to John, Chuck swallowed loudly. John met Sam's eyes for a moment and he could see the hesitation flash across her features.

Sam looked back at Coolidge, her voice low and sad. "Did Dr Keller say that?"

"Yes." Coolidge's voice seemed to tremble for a fraction of a second and, for a moment, it sounded like the man's defences was coming down, but when Sam took another step down, Coolidge's gun hand stiffened and he pressed it tighter against Brown's head. His eyed burned red in the light of the sunset. "They're all going to die because  _you_  refused to go back for them, Colonel. You didn't want to  _save_ them. You left them behind. You left  _Earth_ behind!"

"If we went back, the Wraith would've followed," Sam said, holding her palms up, trying to appear as non-threatening as possible. Her voice was softer now, calm and logical. John wasn't sure if reason would work with Coolidge. The man seemed beyond the point of no return. "Imagine Earth and the Milky Way in the same state as Pegasus, but combined with the aliens that attacked Earth. Would you rather have that? You wouldn't just condemn Earth, you'd condemn the entire galaxy."

"We could've saved them." Coolidge glanced around him, wide-eyed and pale. Something desperate glinted in his eyes. He was derailing. "We've got the city of the Ancients, goddamnit, we could've  _saved_  them!"

"Atlantis isn't enough. The Ancients proved that. Even with a fleet of  _Aurora-_ class ships, they couldn't defeat the Wraith." Sam sounded sad. She took the lapse in Coolidge's attention to move further down the staircase. John inched closer, intent on following her down.

"And  _we're_  barely holding on as it is, James." Coolidge's eyes swivelled back to her, white-knuckled fingers gripped forcefully around the gun. Brown cried silently, her eyes squeezed shut. The security guards tightened their hold on their stun weapons. Sam was halfway down the staircase now. "If we went back to Earth…we'd be faced with two strong opponents instead of one. We'd lose  _everything_."

" _No_ ," Coolidge retorted. His shield of anger was breaking, his eyes shifting more quickly between the security guards surrounding him. "No, I won't believe it. I  _can't_ believe it. That's not the way this works. I've read the reports. You and your precious SG-1 always saved the day. We could do that too; we just need to—to—" He broke off, his breath caught in his throat. John was unnerved to see a clear shine in the man's eyes.

The atmosphere in the gate room thickened. No one seemed to know what else to say. Next to John, Chuck shifted on his feet, obvious uncomfortable. John knew how he felt. This situation had changed to something even more unpredictable. He'd feel a lot better if Coolidge didn't have a loaded gun in his hands.

"I know." Sam broke the silence, soft-voiced and contemplative.

John glanced at her nervously and then back at Coolidge. The IOA representative seemed frozen in place, his eyes trapped in the thousand-yard stare John had seen so many times in Afghanistan. But his grip on the gun handle was still tight. Not a good combination.

"It's terrible not to know what exactly happened to Earth, or the people we love," Sam said. Her words echoed in the tense gate room. "And to have the  _Sun Tzu_ here now… it raises a lot of questions." She paused, her eyes hardened. "We  _all_  want answers, Mr Coolidge, but the fact of the matter is that we can't contact or return to Earth. Our only safe line of communication is the stargate network, but the SGC is gone and the Milky Way network is down. The Wraith are out there, looking for us and for a way to Earth, and that means we can't go anywhere."

Sam took another step down, her voice softer, her palms raised. "I understand your point, Mr Coolidge. This doesn't make sense. We've lost Earth; we've lost people we love. Seven billion people gone, just like that, and we have no clue who our enemy is. It should never have happened, but it has. We can't change the past. Our only choice is to accept that Earth is lost, move on and save what we can."

"And how do you propose we do that?" Coolidge's eyes glinted again, and there was a sharp edge to his voice. He pushed the gun closer to Brown's temple. "How do we move on when it's possible that our family's still alive somewhere and we're stuck here, in this  _goddamned_  galaxy, knowing that we've left them behind and that we didn't save them?"

"I don't know," Sam said. John could feel the sadness in her voice, and something uneasy fluttered in his stomach. It felt like the closest he'd come to Sam's inner thoughts since they'd decided to throw the regulations aside over a year ago.

"Then what's the point?" Coolidge snarled, breaking John out of his thoughts. He tightened his headlock, causing Brown to cry out in pain. The security guards jerked closer, which made Coolidge step back again.

"Don't do it," Sam said, almost with a twinge of sharp desperation. She began to move down the final half of the staircase, drawing Coolidge's attention to her. The man's narrowed eyes were full of anger. "Let Katie go. Take me."

"Sam—" John said, but Sam held her hand up, cutting him off.

"We'll go somewhere quiet," Sam said, eyes locked with Coolidge's. "We can talk about this. Figure something out. Just let Katie go."

John  _really_ wanted his sidearm. Coolidge looked too tempted to take Sam up on her offer, but damned if John was letting her go willingly somewhere with that guy. He began to descend the staircase as slowly but quickly as he could.

Sam had reached the bottom of the staircase. She was at eye level with Coolidge, who'd backed off a couple of steps, his grip on both Katie Brown and the gun white-knuckled.

"There's nothing left to talk about," Coolidge said, his tone indiscernible. His eyes were narrowed and fiery in the red sunlight. Sam inched closer, palms still raised.

"James." Xiaoyi's voice broke through the rising tension. She stood behind one of the security guards, having entered the gate room from a nearby corridor. Her eyes were wide as they locked with her colleague's. "What's going on, James?"

"I'm sorry," Coolidge said.

Then he moved the gun under his chin and pulled the trigger.

* * *

Once the stargate connection cut, Atlantis's gate room became dark and dim with the exception of a few lights in the Operations Centre and the glass office. It gave the atmosphere a chilling feel.

Woolsey stared up at the closed blinds of Xiaoyi's office and held back a sigh. He knew he'd picked a difficult job, but he'd never imagined it would take him somewhere like this.

He glanced around and expected to see signs of what had transpired here, but there was nothing. Not even a drop on the wall or the stargate. It was all red and white stone as it had always been, but covered in shadows of the night. The windows behind the stargate framed some assorted blinking stars and moonlight. A lone Marine stood by the wall, silent and watchful, her features cut in stone. She only gave him a nod.

With slow steps, Woolsey headed for the grand staircase and ascended to the second level. He greeted the two gate technicians on the evening shift, but otherwise bypassed the Operations Centre and headed straight for the glass office. Once he reached the wooden door, his knuckles hesitated above the wood. He had no idea what would face him on the other side. One of their own had died today and not at enemy hands.

Pushing away the uncomfortable thought, Woolsey knocked and entered the office in one continuous motion.

Xiaoyi didn't look up at him immediately. By the light from the desk lamp, she was reading a black leather book covered in scribbling. From what Woolsey could see, it was in Chinese, but he'd never seen the book until now. Perhaps it was a recent acquisition.

"Shen," he said, closing the door behind him and moving in front of the desk. He stood awkwardly as Xiaoyi slowly raised her head and stared up at him. He had no words for the look on her face. It was almost like she didn't see him at all, and yet her eyes bore down on him with absolute clarity.

"Richard," Xiaoyi said tonelessly. She didn't close the leather-bound book in front of her. The light from the desk lamp made shadows play across her face.

"I heard the news. I'm sorry." Woolsey wasn't sure if he was supposed to shake her hand or give her a hug. It was the proper social etiquette, but Xiaoyi had never been the human-contact type. Instead, he remained erect in front of the desk, shifting uneasily on his feet.

"It was quick, at least," Xiaoyi said, glancing down at the book. "I wish I could say the same for the  _Sun Tzu_ survivors. Six are already dead."

"I'm sure Dr Keller's doing everything she can," Woolsey said, but it felt half-hearted and false. He hadn't been here earlier. He couldn't know what it was like. "How…how are you handling it?"

"Fine." Xiaoyi withdrew her eyes and closed the leather-bound book with a  _snap_. She began to pull out files and papers from a nearby stack. Her voice was still void of emotion. "We have things we need to discuss. Please take a seat."

"Can't this wait, Shen?" Woolsey asked, knowing what Xiaoyi had in mind. It wasn't why he was here. "Let's just take a moment. The work can wait for a day or two. For God's sake, James died today."

"I'm fully aware, Richard!" Xiaoyi's tone was sharp and icy. "I was there. It doesn't change the fact that there's work to be done. I'm sure you're aware of the changes that need to be made around here."

"Yes, I got the memo." Woolsey's jaw tightened a little. Reluctantly, he sat down in one of the comfy chairs by the glass wall. "But I don't see how promoting Major Dawkins to Lieutenant Colonel and replacing Sheppard is a good idea. Sheppard has been the military leader on Atlantis for nearly six years. Some might take it as an insult."

"Colonel Caldwell gave his consent," Xiaoyi said. She handed him a fistful of papers. On a cursory look, he could see it was the formal paperwork detailing the change of XOs. "Sheppard hasn't done his job. He's obviously been too lax with security if civilians could get their hands on a loaded gun from the armoury. It almost cost Katie Brown her life, which is unacceptable."

Woolsey felt a shiver run down his spine. He'd never imagined he'd hear Xiaoyi speak of her former colleague and friend so callously. It seemed so unreal.

"Then what is Colonel Carter's crime?" Woolsey asked, recalling the second objective from the memo Xiaoyi had sent him. The Airman on messenger duty had seemed riled about that one in particular. "From what I heard, she attempted to diffuse the situation."

"She's the proof that the former administration was incapable of handling situations like these, not to mention our current situation with the Wraith," Xiaoyi said, her voice cold. "Many of the board members share my sentiments. Colonel Carter is an unpredictable enigma. Someone like that cannot be trusted in an important administrative position such as the one on Tirana."

"And my role in all this?" Woolsey's tone was dark. He had a hunch.

Xiaoyi's lips thinned. "With James gone, you're next in line. Your input is…appreciated."

Woolsey's polite smile didn't meet his eyes.

This was the true face of politics. It all came down to strategy, positioning, and ensuring one's own seat was cushioned. It just so happened that half of the IOA board members listened to Woolsey these days, probably something to do with his recent 're-positioning' to Tirana, and Xiaoyi needed his vote to get a consensus.

"I'm sorry, Shen, but I won't support a decision to remove Colonel Carter from Tirana." Woolsey couldn't say he didn't in part enjoy the sudden glint in Xiaoyi's eyes. "When we took away her command of Atlantis, it was based on the fact that she had made some bad calls that resulted in loss of life and extensive damages to the city. Her work on Tirana, however, has been exemplary."

"Have you forgotten what happened to Sergeant Ramirez?" Xiaoyi asked.

"His injuries were unfortunate, but not something any of us could have foreseen if we'd been in different positions. I see no fault on Colonel Carter's part."

Woolsey sat back in the chair, trying to appear completely at ease. He lowered his voice. "We need to move on, Shen. This thing with James…we can't go on like before. Let's hold a memorial service, find some sort of closure, and get our lives back on track. I think we've deserved it. All of us."

A flash of annoyance crossed Xiaoyi's face, but it disappeared quickly. Instead, Xiaoyi entwined her fingers and gave Woolsey a long, appraising look. Woolsey didn't notice how his neck tensed up until she finally spoke.

"A memorial service sounds like a good idea," Xiaoyi said. She glanced at the leather-bound book she'd perused earlier. "There are many to be mourned."

Seeing how Xiaoyi's eyes lingered on the book and the jade figurine next to it, Woolsey wondered whom she'd lost. She'd never said. But his question never made it past his lips as Xiaoyi found a new stack of papers and handed it to him, an air of no-nonsense business around her.

 _Perhaps one day,_ Woolsey thought, _she'll realise that she can't use politics to make the pain go away. There's a life waiting for her too. It's waiting for all of us._

* * *

Sam stopped pacing when the doors swept open. Expecting Xiaoyi, Sam was surprised when John nodded to the guards outside the door and stepped inside. Her neck tensed as their eyes locked. They hadn't seen each other since Xiaoyi had called them both into her office after…the incident. Sam was still fuming about the sudden decision to replace John with the newly promoted Lieutenant Colonel Dawkins.

"Hey," John said, breaking the silence. He glanced around the room – Sam's former quarters, still with some of her things packed away in boxes – and visibly tensed as his eyes passed the bed. He hurriedly looked away.

"I figured you'd be in the gym kicking the shit out of Ronon," Sam said, testing the waters. It relieved her to see John's lips twitch in a smirk.

"I was," John said. "But then I got sick of sitting on my ass all the time. I think he's getting cabin fever."

"Tell me about it." Sam clenched her hands and paced over to the window. "I've been spoiled on Tirana. Lots of fresh air, grass, local brew…" She paused, staring at the moonlit oceans outside that lapped against the piers of Atlantis. "It doesn't take me long these days to feel like bouncing off the walls."

"Probably doesn't help being confined to quarters," John said. Sam only hummed darkly in agreement. Along with Xiaoyi's decision to replace John, Sam had been put in house arrest until the IOA board had convened to talk about her future on Tirana. It was like the aftermath of Kadara all over again.

John walked over to the wall next to her and leaned against it, staring into the air, his arms crossed. For a long while neither of them said anything. It was actually a somewhat comfortable silence. It nearly made Sam smile.

"So…" Sam's hesitant voice broke the quiet atmosphere. "You going to be okay in charge of the training regimes?"

"Yeah," John said. He didn't sound angry or frustrated, just…accepting. "I mean, it sucks that I'll have to go through Mr Twin Peaks to get off world, but at least I've learned a lot about his weak spots in the past few months. I'll be sure to use them to our advantage."

 _Our_. That's what Sam's mind noted. John was still on board with their secret operations, despite all that had happened today. It comforted her to hear that.

"Good. Don't make it too easy on him," Sam said simply. Their eyes met and they shared a small smirk. John's mischievous side seemed to pop up. Sam could recall some of his practical jokes from before. She wouldn't mind seeing Dawkins on the other side of those.

Silence fell over them again.

"Y'know, I figured out something today." Sam's voice was low as she stared out the window. The moonlight spread across Atlantis, making it appear gold and silver in the darkness.

John pushed off the wall and came to stand next to her, shoulder-to-shoulder, but not touching. Sam could still feel his warmth. It was distracting.

"I can't win against her," Sam said. The culmination of all that had happened these past few days and months made her feel like the wind had been knocked out of her. "I'm not a politician."

"Then don't be one." John's words were simple.

Sam managed a smile in return. "You make it sound so easy."

"Just focus on your end," John said, shrugging. "We've got bigger fish to fry."

"Well… There  _is_ the matter of Commander Taron and his men I need to resolve." Sam blew out a breath. She could just picture the major headache any meeting with the Genii would cause. "The Genii blew me off earlier today when I tried to contact them. Spouted something about an emergency and getting back to me in a few days."

"See, you've got more than enough to worry about." John nudged her shoulder, his warmth spreading through her instantly. He gave her a smirk, looking almost comfortable standing right next to her. "I'll take care of Atlantis."

Something tugged at her insides almost painfully. Sam found a smile somewhere and pasted it on her face, ignoring the sudden burning in her eyes. There was a hole gaping in her chest that she'd ignored for a long time. He managed to remind her of it.

"Thank you," Sam said finally, her words slightly thick due to the clench in her throat. She returned her stare to the scenery outside the window, not trusting herself to keep her eyes locked with his.

* * *

John didn't know how long they'd stood together by the window, almost touching, completely silent, staring at the moonlight like old times, when the doors opened again.

Woolsey. The man spoke to the guards outside, dismissed them, and then entered the room with an air of authority John hadn't seen since he'd been the temporary commander of Atlantis almost two years ago.

"Colonels," Woolsey greeted both, then settled his eyes on Sam. "Colonel Carter, I'm sure you'll be pleased to know the IOA board has cleared you of all charges. We see no fault with your work on Tirana. You're free to go."

Sam didn't move.

Woolsey hesitated and glanced between the two colonels. "That said… I'd like to apologise on behalf of the IOA for all the trouble you've gone through today."

 _More like the past eight months_ , John wanted to say, but held back when Sam spoke up.

"Thank you." Sam's tone was formal, her eyes somewhat guarded. She crossed her arms, as if considering her next move. "I'm sorry for your loss," she said eventually.

A sad grimace flickered across Woolsey's face. "Thank you, Colonel. James was…troubled. He didn't take the loss of Earth very well."

"It hasn't exactly been easy for anyone," John said, slightly rude. He was still pissed that Coolidge had managed to get his hands on a gun and threatened to kill an innocent woman earlier. There was also that other grievance towards Sam that John couldn't get out of his mind. Sympathy didn't come easy.

"I'm not condoning James's actions, Colonel," said Woolsey, giving John a second look. "I just…"

He turned to Sam, visibly torn between troubled and resigned. "When the SGC evacuated eight months ago, James's family was in a car outside Cheyenne Mountain, waiting to pick him up so they could go on Christmas holiday. James tried to have them evacuated too." Woolsey paused, his eyes sad behind his glasses. "But there wasn't enough time. General Landry ordered the Mountain closed in preparation of the self-destruct. I… I suspect James couldn't live with himself after that."

The silence that followed was awkward. John looked to Sam, unsure what to say himself. He'd carried his frustrations for so long, they couldn't just disappear at the drop of a hat. Sam was the one who saw the good in people.

"I understand," Sam said simply. Her eyes had softened, but her posture was still tense.

Woolsey seemed to accept that this was all the reaction he would get. "Well," he said uneasily, "I'm sure you're eager to get back to the mine camp, Colonel. I won't hold you any longer."

"What about you?" Sam asked, halting Woolsey's exit.

"I'm returning to Atlantis," Woolsey said, a half-smile on his face. "There's no further need for a civilian oversight on Tirana. You've got things running smoothly, Colonel. I trust that you'll keep it that way."

If John didn't know any better, he'd swear Woolsey almost winked at them. But the man had exited the room before John could think twice, and all he heard was Sam's relieved exhale of air.

"I'm gonna head down and check on Reika and Ramirez before I leave," Sam said, turned towards John with a smile. "Come with me?"

John shook away the uneasy feeling in his gut. "Sure."

They headed out the door and down the dimmed corridor. There was not another soul in sight. Only their footsteps broke the silence as they traipsed down familiar paths, winding up outside the transporter.

That's when Sam's hand gripped his and squeezed it once, almost hesitantly. It felt cold when her fingers let go. John looked at her, bewildered and slightly on guard. Sam's eyes glittered in the dimness, silent but heavy, and in a moment of clarity, John thought he knew. It made his insides clench.

John opened his mouth, intending to say a lot of things, but none came out. There was a lot going on inside his head, travelling at light speed. In the end, he seemed to say more than a thousand words. Sam entered the now open transporter and looked back at him with a sad smile.

"I know," she said and gestured to the spot next to her. "Let's just get down to the infirmary."

And the way she said it made John's insides twist again, but not in a good way.

* * *

 

 

 

  
**Next:** "That there's some corner…"

* * *

 


	19. DAY 250

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is time to move on, to mourn, with a little help from your friends.

* * *

**EIGHTEEN** **| "That there's some corner…"**

_Prompt: a time to mourn  
Music: "Lily's Theme" from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 OST, Alexandre Desplat_

* * *

**DAY 250**

Sam stared at the towering hulk that was left of the  _Sun Tzu_. She recognised the marks from enemy plasma fire, the hull breaches from when the ship had crashed through the meteoroid field surrounding M2X-914, and the other marks of internal strain that'd finally broken the ship down to a twisted wreck.

It seemed so hopelessly pointless.

Back on Atlantis, there were five survivors: only 2,5 % of the original two hundred crew. Those who'd been poisoned by the radiation leaks were dead. The rest were recovering from internal injuries, broken bones, amputations, concussions, haemorrhaging, and with starvation and dehydration on top of that. Jennifer had put three of them in medically induced comas. The remaining two had so far been unable to say anything about the circumstances that'd brought them to a godforsaken planet on the rim of the Pegasus galaxy. They just weren't coherent long enough for information.

That left Rodney's project. But even though he'd spent every waking hour of the past two weeks trying to decrypt what he'd downloaded from the  _Sun Tzu's_ computer, Rodney still hadn't been able to get anything out of it other than the crew manifest. Which meant they knew as much about the alien attack on Earth and the crew's life for the past eight months as before the  _Sun Tzu_ arrived: zilch.

A deep sigh escaped Sam's lips.

"Ma'am?"

Captain Matthews stood on Sam's left, eyes creased in worry for a fraction of a second. When Sam looked at her, however, her soldier's mask came up and Matthews straightened.

"We put up the plaque on the inside of the hull." Matthews nodded towards the tear in the ship they'd used as an entrance _._ It'd once been the door to the starboard hangar bay, which had ended up twenty miles north of here."Thought it'd be less obvious in case someone came here."

"Good," said Sam, but even she could hear her voice sounded alien. A sharp, cold wind was biting into the exposed skin on her cheeks. Despite the heavy gear and warm clothes she had on, she felt frozen to the bone.

Hailey had argued against putting up the plaque, which contained the names of the many –  _too many_  –  _Sun Tzu_ fatalities, saying that it could be traced back to them. But Sam wanted to do something specific for these people. Perhaps only to ease her mind from the fact that she felt like a grave robber.

Sam's throat constricted. She turned away from the ruined  _Sun Tzu_ and faced Matthews, her voice still feeling like a separate part from her body. "Are we ready to move out?"

"Yes, ma'am," Matthews said smoothly and gestured to the Ancient puddle jumper behind her. "The cargo's been secured in the Jumper."

"Then let's not linger," Sam said. She looked around at the barren arctic desert surrounding the broken ship. There was nothing but ice and rock in every direction, and the sun felt lifeless. The ship's graveyard should've been a green pasture with a sun that warmed. Not... Well, she couldn't change that. She just had to accept it. "Let's give this place some peace."

"Aye, ma'am." Matthews gave a curt nod and turned to face the Jumper. At her gesture, the engine fired up.

Sam gave the  _Sun Tzu_ one lingering stare, and for a moment she felt like the weight of the galaxy weighed upon her shoulders once more. Insurmountable, unbelievable and perhaps even deserved. If this was the true mantle of military command, she could understand why Major General O'Neill always wanted to retire.

It was lonely at the top. Lonely and terrifying. Sam half-wished Caldwell could step forward and take charge of this whole subterfuge thing they had going on, but command of  _Daedalus_ and his connection to Xiaoyi kept him both busy and unavailable. In effect, Sam was in charge. She was alone.

She was tired.

* * *

"Mind if I join you?"

John looked up from his half-eaten sandwich to see Daniel Jackson smile at him, tray in hand. Sparing a surreptitious glance around at the less than crowded Little Chow, John tried to ignore the tension in his neck as he nodded towards the empty seat across from him.

"Sure."

"Thanks," said Jackson. He sat down promptly as John continued to eat. "So, keeping busy?"

"Yeah," John said simply, trying not to appear too interested in his meal. Even though they'd spent some time together due to Reika, John hadn't quite yet reached the point where he was comfortable around someone who could claim to be Sam's oldest friend. Words didn't come easily.

"Sam told me you're stepping up the training regimes," Jackson said conversationally. He took a bite of an apple and then a sip of tea. "Expecting something?"

"No," John said, perhaps a tad too quickly. When Jackson raised an eyebrow, John held back a groan. "Not anything in particular. Doesn't hurt to be prepared, though." Besides, Caldwell had given him the green light, which meant Xiaoyi must have approved.

"Hmm." Jackson hummed, staring out through the windows at the South Pier stretching into the distance.

He didn't say anything for a long while, seemingly lost in thought. John spent the time finishing his sandwich and his juice. He had every intention to make a discreet exit within seconds. It wasn't that Jackson was a bad guy, just…he always seemed to know a bit more than he let on, reminding John too much of Teyla on occasions. There was also something about the way he treated John, like he knew something. Something that was supposed to have been kept secret.

"I was meaning to ask you," said Jackson suddenly, making John, who'd been in the process of getting discreetly to his feet, stop halfway. The archaeologist looked up at him, peering at him closely without appearing to have noted his intention to leave. "Have you noticed anything different about Sam lately?"

"Uhh…" John knitted his eyebrows together. He thought back to the last time he'd seen Sam. It'd been more than a week ago…no, two weeks. The memorial service; they'd attended it together. "Can't say that I have. We've been busy."

"I was on Tirana a few days ago," Jackson said. He looked as if he wanted to heave a deep sigh. "She looked ill. Like she did after…well, after Kadara."

The meaningful gaze Jackson directed at him made John's stomach churn uncomfortably. He recalled the event perfectly. After the attack on Kadara, things had been really bad. If Sam was back there again…

"You want  _me_  to do something," John half-asked, half-stated, guessing this had been Jackson's intention from the start. The look in Jackson's eyes confirmed it. John's neck tensed and he shifted on his feet, mumbling: "I'm not good with that. You'd have better luck."

"I tried," said Jackson, clearly torn between anxiety and exasperation. There was a hint of pain in his voice as he added, "She brushed me off."

"Well, if you can't…"

"John." Jackson peered up at him through his glasses and John had a sensation he looked straight through him. The feeling was unsettling. "I know that we're not exactly friends, but we both know Sam. We both…care about her."

The way he said the last three words caused John to stiffen and withdraw his gaze hastily to glance around the Little Chow. No one seemed the slightest bit interested in their conversation, but John still had the feeling everyone was looking at him. Warnings of 'danger' coursed through him.

"Please," Jackson said, his voice low. "Just…talk to her."

John barely met Jackson's eyes, still tense, the words and implications tumbling around inside his head. Eventually, all he managed to say was, "I've got to go."

He tried not to seem like he was running as he left Little Chow. But he knew damn well he was.

* * *

Nearly invisible in the curtain of thick rain, Hailey and Airman Emerson met them as the puddle jumper landed in its usual secluded spot in the forest outside the Tikwee colony. As the engine disengaged, Sam unbuckled and rose tiredly from her seat, turning to Matthews who exited the front section. They'd shed their warm clothes and radiation suits and stuffed them in crates.

"Get this stuff to the cave," Sam said, gesturing to the stack of metallic containers secured in the back compartment. There was no need to mention it had to be done in secret. Even with Woolsey gone, Xiaoyi's spies remained. "Except that one." Sam tapped one of the smaller, padlocked containers on top of the stack. "Bring it to my cabin. I'll have a look at it later when I return."

"Aye, ma'am." Matthews gestured to their two companions – both Air Force engineers and Atlantis veterans – and they began to divide the containers between them.

Satisfied they could handle this, Sam punched the hatch release button and watched the back of the Jumper open to reveal rain pouring down in buckets. A swift surge of wind pushed the rain inside to startled curses from Matthews and the others. Smirking, Sam pulled up the hood of her raincoat and exited.

Holding his hood in place with a tight grip, Emerson gave her a quick salute as he went past her to help the others. Sam returned it, holding her own hood as she approached Hailey. The young captain wore a foul grimace.

"I take back what I said about the heat," Hailey said loudly, falling into step with Sam as she walked down the path leading back towards the Tikwee colony. "This is worse. I heard someone in the village say it's gonna be like this for the next month!"

"It'll pass. At least we're safe from a flood," said Sam, eyes fixed on the muddy ground ahead. In the foresight of the Tikwee colonists, the mine camp had been built far enough up from the lake to escape any flooding. "How'd it go with the Genii?"

"Not good," muttered Hailey, scowling beneath her hood. "I had to wait for an hour just to get a meeting with Massan. I've got the feeling they know what we want and don't want to face it."

Sam held back a sigh. "Seeing as we've waited this long, I'm not surprised. I should've dealt with Commander Taron right away. They've had time to close ranks."

"With all due respect, ma'am, you're not to blame for that. It's Murphy and his damn law's fault," Hailey said pointedly. "I mean, how the hell could we know the  _Sun Tzu_ would show up the next day?" She blew out an annoyed breath. "And he's still hanging around, I reckon. We could do with something going right these days."

The sentiment in Hailey's voice made Sam smirk slightly. It felt good after the draining morning; seeing the ruined  _Sun Tzu_ had taken a piece of her. She was still freezing from the trip to M2X-914.

She made a turn where the path divided, choosing the one that led to the Tikwee colony. Master Togar had invited her for lunch with the village council today, something she wouldn't miss in a million years. For one, the food was always delicious. And the company was good in more than one way. Mainly, the village councilmembers were one of Sam's main sources of information; they had a network of informants spread across the Pegasus galaxy. Right now, she could do with some news, particularly about the Wraith. The civil war seemed to be intensifying.

"So what did Massan say?" Sam asked as they trudged through a beaten-down field of grass. Smoke from the village chimneys wafted through the rain, mixed with the familiar spicy scents associated with the Tikwee colonists' food. They had to be close.

"We'll get a meeting next week at the earliest," said Hailey, grumbling a little. High above them, the clouds thundered. "Apparently, Chief Radim has a tight schedule. Massan could only promise us half an hour."

"It's better than nothing," Sam said, but she finally let out the sigh she'd held back. Turning to gaze sideways at the captain, Sam gave her a small smile. "Thanks, Hailey."

Hailey shrugged, still holding on tightly to the hood of her raincoat. "It's what you pay me for."

"I pay you?" Sam raised an eyebrow as their path joined the wider road leading from the stargate to the village. Houses and cottages began to pop up in the distance, barely visible in the rain.

"Nuts and bolts, ma'am," Hailey teased. "And the chance to get to blow something up occasionally. Maybe next time you'll let me have a go at Radim's Chief of Security."

Smirking, Sam rolled her eyes. Hailey might have to get in line.

* * *

The blue swirl of the active stargate always fascinated Richard Woolsey. It was like one of those psychedelic pictures that played tricks on your eyes if you stared too long at it. Except in this picture, things really could pop out of it.

From his seat in the glass office, Richard watched as the blue event horizon rippled in succession, letting out four combat-clad soldiers led by Captain Matthews. Another combat team had already passed the opposite way minutes earlier, their destination Tirana and an 8-hour night shift keeping an eye on the stargate.

As security officers stepped forward to secure and take away their weapons according to standard protocol, the soldiers in the gate room smiled at each other and obviously laughed over some joke. It brought a smile to Richard's lips. The sight was pleasant compared to the dull and lethargic faces that'd roamed the city for months previously. Perhaps the memorial service had worked; people seemed more at ease these days.

_Well, most of them_ , Richard amended. He withdrew his eyes from the laughing soldiers and gazed at the woman seated behind the glass-like desk. Steely-faced, Xiaoyi raised an icy eyebrow at him.

"Do you need a break, Richard?" Her voice was devoid of emotion. She was pale, had lost weight, slept rarely, and reminded Richard vaguely of how Colonel Carter had appeared before she was reassigned to Tirana: as if something was eating her slowly from the inside. But she, like Carter had, still refused to acknowledge it. It was like trying to walk alongside someone who marched to a different drummer.

"No, no." Richard straightened in his seat and caught hold of a folder that threatened to slip off his lap. "You were saying?"

Xiaoyi's lips only thinned for a moment, but she didn't comment his obvious lapse in attention. Instead she said, "Dr McKay approached me yesterday about upgrading Atlantis's shields. He believes he now has the parts and plans to ensure that the shields will hold longer than ten minutes against the Wraith superhive should we encounter them again."

"That's good news," Richard said, a rush of excitement going through him. He knew enough of which technical areas in the city needed improvement from when Colonel Carter had been in charge. "Did Dr McKay have an estimate of how long it'll take?"

"No more than a month, given his resources or manpower do not decrease," said Xiaoyi, peering down at a piece of paper. "I am worried that he might be balancing too many pots, however."

"I doubt he would see it that way." Richard hid a smile. The brief period he'd been in command of Atlantis nineteen months ago had been enough to know that Dr McKay seemed to thrive under pressure. He realised, however, that Xiaoyi had given this some thought. "What did you have in mind?"

"I believe there is a phrase in English that says 'two heads are better than one," said Xiaoyi. She met his eyes across the desk. They were cold and devoid of life, and her voice seemed like a different part of her. "If a few of the projects under Dr McKay's supervision were to go to someone else, he could turn his whole attention to the shield upgrades. From what I understand, it is quite extensive and precise work, and I will not gamble with the lives in this city."

Woolsey felt a slight chill go down his spine, but he couldn't explain why. "That seems…reasonable. Have you talked to him?"

"I will do it tomorrow," said Xiaoyi, her face blank. Without further ado, she flipped the papers on her desk. "Now, let us discuss off-world missions. I think we could afford to increase them from…"

* * *

"Come on, slowpoke," Reese teased across her shoulder as she strolled down the network of corridors that led from the mess hall called Little Chow towards the central tower. "Want me to get the wheelchair?"

"Not unless you want to be in it,  _ma'am_ ," said Ramirez through slightly gritted teeth. He gripped the crutches tightly as he hobbled forward, his eyebrows knitted together in concentration.

The people who passed them gave him a wide berth, obviously eyeing his bandaged leg. Some wore looks of pity. Ramirez was too focused to notice, but Reese did. It spurred her on. The last thing he wanted was to be seen as a cripple.

"You're not exactly in a position to be a threat, Sergeant," Reese said, stopping at the junction to watch him hobble towards her. "I bet my grandma could take you down in her sleep."

Ramirez snorted, beads of sweat covering his forehead. "No offense to your  _abuela_ , Cap'n, but  _los bravos a la plaza, y los mansos al corral_."

Reese raised an eyebrow. "You know I don't speak Spanish, Ramirez."

"Then you'll have to learn, won't you?" Ramirez stopped a few feet away, a wide cheeky grin on his face even as he panted slightly. He nodded to her watch. "Time."

Shaking her head, bemused, Reese checked her wristwatch. "Ten minutes, eighteen seconds. That's one minute, thirty-two seconds faster than last time."

"Not bad for a guy on one leg, huh?" asked Ramirez, grinning. He shifted on his good foot so he could lean slightly against the wall, and adjusted his crutches accordingly.

Despite the brave face he put on, Reese could see that he was more tired than the first time she'd broken him out of the infirmary for dinner in Little Chow. Maybe Keller had been right that it might be too much too soon. He was already testing himself.

"Maybe we should head back," Reese said, stepping closer but trying not to appear as if she was ready in case he needed assistance. The sergeant saw right through her and gave her a glare.

"Not yet, Cap'n." Ramirez pushed off the wall and readjusted his crutches. "I want to drop by somewhere. Got a promise to keep."

Realising it'd be pointless to argue – Ramirez could be as stubborn as a mule – Reese just tagged along as he began to navigate down the next two corridors.

"Promise? As in a date?" she asked, smirking. "Didn't know you had it in you, sergeant."

Ramirez scoffed. "Plenty of  _cojones_ , Cap'n, just so you know." He stared ahead as they came to an intersection, and then turned left. His tone changed as they spotted a long stretch of wall ahead. "But not today. This is something different."

Reese followed Ramirez's eyes and realisation slammed into her like a freight train. They'd reached the Memorial Wall. It was a long corridor with floor-to-ceiling windows on one side overlooking the glittering city of Atlantis outside, and a straight red metallic wall on the other. It'd been established two weeks ago after the memorial service. People milled about the corridor, the atmosphere hushed and solemn.

Hundreds of pictures, letters and notes were tacked to the wall, starting around a large plaque of commemoration to the victims of the  _Sun Tzu_  and those who'd fallen here in the Pegasus galaxy since Earth fell, and they stretched in every direction as far as Reese could see. There were even some lit candles on the floor. Reese didn't even know they  _had_ candles.

Frozen, Reese didn't realise Ramirez had moved before a loud  _thwack_ caught her attention. A BDU-clad Airman standing further down the corridor had punched her fist into the wall. The woman next to her, obviously a scientist, looked around awkwardly before putting a hand on her friend's shoulder. The hand was shrugged off violently before the Airman stormed off, pushing past people without a care.

When Reese met Ramirez's eyes, she knew they were thinking the same thing. Denial. They'd seen it far too often in the past eight months. Some were still stuck in limbo, even after all this time.

Silent, Reese stepped closer as Ramirez turned back towards the wall. She noticed he held a wrinkled and blood-stained picture in his hand. From what she could make out, it was a trio of people gathered together in bundle, all smiles.

"Who's that?" Reese asked quietly, standing next to him. Her suspicion was Ramirez's family, but it was difficult to tell due to the obvious wear and tear.

"Sanders, with his parents," Ramirez said, surprising her. A stony expression spread across his face. "They died in a car crash when he was young. He showed it to me when we were on that mission. The doctor found it clutched in his hand when he…when he died." He stared at the teenaged Trevor Sanders's grinning face in-between a couple that looked like they could be in their late fifties. "I promised him I'd take care of it."

Reese's throat clenched. In a brief flash of memory, she recalled the flower he'd obviously put on Sanders's grave when they'd visited it on the mainland months ago. For an instant, she felt a rush of  _something_ , but she felt like that woman earlier who'd looked around desperately as if asking for help.

"You're a good guy, Miguel," Reese said in the end, her voice low. She hesitated, then put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it briefly.

Ramirez looked sideways at her, but before their eyes could meet, Reese moved further down the corridor. She needed the distance. Tears had welled up in her eyes.

_It still hurts._ The thought repeated itself in Reese's mind.  _All this time, and it still hurts._

Her fists clenched at her sides, but she resisted the urge to punch something. That had never been her outlet. She was more of a drink-and-talk kind of woman. Or cry, whatever came first. But she tended to do it in private. This was too public, so she pushed back everything that hurt until the tears themselves seemed to push back into her eyes.

When she opened her eyes, Ramirez was standing next to her, his expression not one of pity. He just raised his eyebrows and asked, "Race you to the infirmary, Cap'n? The turtle always wins, y'know."

A chuckle burst unexpectedly from the pit of Reese's stomach, rippling through her. It felt both right and wrong at the same time. But…perhaps that was how it was supposed to be. A bit of both until one day it just felt good _._ Or, so she hoped.

"Some other day, sergeant," said Reese, smirking as they began to move away from the Memorial Wall. "I'd rather not upset the people holding the big needles."

" _Maldito_ ," muttered Ramirez, slightly panicked. "I forgot about that."

"Want me to get the wheelchair?" Reese asked, smirking. She slowed her gait to walk alongside Ramirez as he lumbered forward on his crutches.

The glare he gave her was answer enough.

But when they reached the transporter and got in line behind a group of scientists, Ramirez turned to give Reese a slightly awkward look. "I appreciate you taking the time to do this, Cap'n. Breaking me out, I mean. I know you're not on the clock."

"For such a pretty face as yours, Ramirez, how could I say stay away?" teased Reese, not sure whether she should hide the smile that threatened to break out on her face. A blush almost seemed to rise in the sergeant's face. It was gone as quickly as it'd appeared, though, making Reese wonder if she'd imagined it.

"Ah, I should've known," sighed Ramirez dramatically. "You're just after my good looks. Or perhaps it is my  _coj—_ "

Reese elbowed him, hard.  _That_  was a Spanish word she  _did_ understand.

People in the queue eyed them out of the corner of their eyes. Fighting off the hotness in her cheeks, Reese looked pointedly elsewhere. But she could see in the corner of her eye that Ramirez grinned.

* * *

Laughter echoed down the corridors and into the infirmary ward in which John sat. The voices of Captain Matthews and Sergeant Ramirez grew out of the laughter into sometimes coherent chatter as they approached the doorway and eventually passed it, the latter limping forward on crutches. Judging by the tones in which they spoke, they were having a good time.

John managed a small smirk. That's how he wanted his subordinates to be: pleased, optimistic, and maybe even happy.

He'd seen more of that lately. As if something had changed in the city after the memorial service. Even the gym seemed to reek less of short-tempered and aggressive soldiers, which included thrice-fist-fighting-his-own Sergeant Nelson. It made training more bearable when John didn't have to break up fights every other day.

Then again, there were still those who seemed to float in a different direction. John tried to do what he could for them, but many were in his opinion beyond saving at this point. The loss of Earth had just been too much. Soldiers needed a strong psyche and if they didn't…he couldn't take them into battle. It was too dangerous.

Which brought John's mind right back on the track it'd been since he came here after the last training class ended an hour ago: Sam. Jackson was worried about her. And he'd tried to blackmail John into doing  _something,_ without specifying what exactly.

The whole thing frustrated him. John wasn't a miracle worker. He wasn't even that close to her anymore. He was just…

John didn't know  _what_ he was. But he sure as hell didn't have the slightest clue what to do about Sam, whether or not she was in as bad shape as Jackson indicated. Jackson's words lingered at the front of his mind, churning over and over like a broken record.

" _Just…talk to her."_

Talk. The prospect seemed terrifying all of a sudden. There'd been a time when they could talk, but now… After all that had happened, John felt the words stick in his throat whenever things strayed from professional topics. Like that time in the transporter two weeks ago, when Sam had given him a look that spoke to some repressed and forgotten part of him. Those soulful blue eyes still haunted him. It was worse than all those harsh and terrible looks they'd exchanged after their…

John couldn't bring himself to say the word, even in the privacy of his mind. It still felt secret, forbidden; admitting to the end of their non-regulation relationship was as good as admitting they'd  _had_ a relationship.

He sighed and ground his hands into his face. The calm, steady breaths from Reika's respirator eventually drew his attention. She looked so peaceful. As if all the bad that'd happened to her didn't matter. It might just be his imagination, but John even felt as if part of her was already breathing on her own, breaking free of the life-support machine. She was becoming human again thanks to Jennifer's treatments. With a little help from her friends, she was going to make it.

With a little help... Maybe that was it.

John reached out with a smile and squeezed Reika's hand. "Thanks, kiddo."

* * *

Hailey could really be bossy sometimes. Sam didn't know whether she should demote or promote the captain for being so…stubborn.

After the dinner at Master Togar's with the village council, Sam had gone to the secret cave in the mines to get some work done. Hailey had already been there and Sam had rebuffed the woman's initial rebukes that she should get some rest; she hadn't had a decent evening off in weeks. However, Sam had been equally stubborn and refused. It had taken nearly three short-circuited power couplings for Sam to finally admit that yes, perhaps an early night was a good option.

It was just…there was so much to do. Sam rarely managed to sleep when everything she'd not managed to get done during the day rolled around uneasily in her head. But Hailey had been firm. For a moment, she'd reminded Sam so strongly of John that Sam eventually conceded defeat.

Which was why Sam was currently sitting on the edge of her bed, staring at the blazing fire in the fireplace, when the time was barely past 19:00 local time. But despite the heavy feeling in her body, she was no closer to sleep than the countless nights before. So Sam stared into the flames, her mind blank and her body a conflict of tiredness and tension.

She felt…empty. Devoured. Drained. Sapped. Like a battery had dried up.

Listlessly, Sam glanced around the cabin. It was a one-room log cabin with a few curtained windows, a simple bed and closet in one end, and a desk and chair in the other end next to the door. It didn't feel quite like home. Not like Atlantis had done for a while. Not like…not like Earth. But it was at least  _her_  space. She could do with it as she wished.

Her eyes drifted to the desk in the corner. There was a small, padlocked container on it. For a moment, Sam stared at it in confusion, then abruptly remembered this morning's trip to M2X-914 and the ruins of  _Sun Tzu._

The invisible weight grew heavier. Tears welled up in her eyes with a suddenness that caught her off guard, and Sam wasn't quick enough to stop some of them from falling. She slumped back on the bed, the heels of her hands digging into her eye sockets. A cold tremble rose up along her spine.

_Don't do this,_ her mind supplied after a while. _You're better than this. There's no use crying over the past… You can't change it. Get up. Do something. Don't sit here like a weak mess. That container is important. Get up._

Sam cleared her thick throat and straightened. She set her eyes determinedly on the padlocked container and got to her feet, brushing away lingering wetness on her cheeks as she went to her desk.

After making sure all the curtains were drawn, Sam turned up the light on the oil lamp and sat down in her chair. She input her personal five-digit code on the container and opened it. An assortment of wires and storage crystals clustered the inside. It was the remains of a back-up computer on a level behind and below the  _Sun Tzu'_ sbridge, fortunately far from the radiated sections of the wreck.

Rodney hadn't thought to just take the crystals with him. He'd just been concerned with downloading whatever information he could. That was the Pegasus way. But Sam had helped design the  _Daedalus-_ class F-304 battle cruisers. She knew stuff he probably didn't. Such as that back-up computer, which only saved the most recent data and surveillance from the bridge before downloading it to the central computer in engineering.

Sam had only remembered when she visited the remains of  _Sun Tzu_ to salvage what she could. Based on the reports, she'd suspected the entire level with the back-up computer had been crushed along with the bridge. It'd been a mess, but she'd found it.

Now she only hoped to glean something from it. Such as what happened on the bridge before they crashed. Maybe – and it was a very big maybe – it could give her a clue about Earth. Something had made them crash. Of course, it could've been fatigue from the intergalactic journey, but it didn't seem likely. Sam wanted to cover all bases. And she wouldn't mind getting a piece of information before Xiaoyi managed to get answers from the survivors. Just to get the upper hand.

Wishing she had a cup of decent, Earth-origin black coffee, Sam set to work.

* * *

John hadn't planned for heavy rain. One of the Marines posted at the stargate for the night had offered her raincoat, but John had politely declined. She'd need it more than he did since she'd just started her shift. As a result, he was drenched by the time he got to the mine camp.

The light streaming from the windows of the dozen or so log cabins was a welcome sight, as was the waft of something hot and spicy from the mess hall chimney. Tempted as he was to drop inside, however, John could see that his target's cabin had lights on, and he hurried down to the lakeside.

Rapping the door twice, he waited – tense, nervous and impatient – as more cold rain trickled down his neck. After a minute with no reply, John pushed the door open and hurried inside. The sight that met him stopped him in his tracks.

Sam lay slumped over her desk surrounded by a PC tablet, stacks of paper and a clutter of something that looked like those Ancient storage crystals connected with wires. A soft snore escaped her open mouth and John wrinkled his nose when he saw a small pool of drool beneath her head.

Then John couldn't help but grin, and the coiled tension in his stomach seemed to vanish completely. He'd caught her like this a few times before when she was still the commander of Atlantis. Despite the 'eew' factor of the drool, she was still kinda cute in her sleep. That hadn't changed.

However, this put him somewhat in a bind. He'd intended to hear how it'd gone with the Genii, as well as fill her in on news from Atlantis as a way to start up a conversation that – maybe – made them both less resistant to talk about…the other stuff... But the sight of her brought to mind Jackson's words that Sam had looked ill. Judging by present circumstances, perhaps it'd just been a case of little to none sleep; he knew how driven Sam could get on occasion. He should probably just let her sleep.

Glancing at Sam again, John grimaced. Sleeping like that would give her a serious kink in the neck and back. He decided on his approach and finally tapped her shoulder.

On the third tap, Sam's head snapped up. Confusion was written all over her face. She glanced around, eyes heavy-lidded, and struggled to focus on him once she spotted him.

"Hey, come here." John pushed the chair back and gently pulled her to her feet.

Sam rubbed her eyes. "John? What're you…"

"Never mind that," John said, half-supporting her as Sam stumbled forwards at his gentle push. He didn't notice that he didn't feel awkward with her warm body pressed up against his. "You need sleep. In a bed. Come on."

They reached the bed in the corner, positioned opposite of the dying fireplace. With a firm hand, John sat Sam down on the edge and hunched down to unlace her boots. Sam blinked at him blearily, still confused.

Once the boots were off, John eyed Sam's leather jacket and hesitated. "You should probably take your jacket off. I'll get the fire going again."

He turned before she had a chance to reply. From a stack in the corner, John found a few logs and threw them into the fireplace. Crouching, he blew at the embers until the logs caught fire. Once heat rolled off the fire once more, John turned.

Sam had pulled off her jacket and sweater, leaving her in a regulation black tank top. She'd also taken off her trousers, but thankfully she was already under the covers, her head on her pillow. John thanked small favours for that.

"You're wet," Sam noted. Her eyes were a bit more alert and focused, but she didn't move.

John looked down at the puddle of water that'd pooled around him. "Yeah. Didn't check the weather forecast before I left."

An easy grin crossed Sam's face. There was no sign of tension or apparent embarrassment in her features. Quite the opposite of how John felt at the moment. The nervous tension was back in force.

"Look", he said, "I'll see if I can't get back here tomorrow or the day after. You should get some sleep." In fact, she looked exhausted. It made that repressed and forgotten part of him worry.

"You should dry up," Sam said. "I think I have something that might fit in there." She tried to gesture to a nearby closet, but her arm didn't get high enough. John got the gist of it, though.

Although he couldn't help wonder why exactly Sam thought she had something that might fit him in her closet, John knew asking that was dangerous territory. For one, it made his stomach coil uncomfortably at the implication that Sam kept menswear so close to her bed.

"I'm already drenched. What's a bit more water?" John shrugged and managed a smirk that felt a bit too tight for his face. A surge of  _something_ rushed through him when Sam chuckled and tucked her head sleepily into her pillow. The action was so familiar, so…personal.

"Suit yourself," Sam said, her voice muffled by the pillow. She'd closed her eyes and seemed like she was already drifting off.

Awkward, John eyed her for a moment more before turning back towards the door. He spotted the clutter on Sam's desk and wondered briefly whether he should tidy it up. Rodney always got mad at him for touching his stuff. So far, Sam hadn't, but if she had a system in that chaos, he didn't want to disrupt it.

Prepared to pass the desk in silence, John halted when he noticed the carved bird he'd given Sam for her birthday last year. It stood proudly next to her PC tablet, slightly in front of the picture of a happy and comfortable SG-1 that stood behind it. It would've been straight in her line of sight from where she sat earlier.

"I never thanked you." Sam's voice was sudden. "For the picture…"

John startled slightly and stared sideways at her. Once more, her eyes were open and alert. The light from the fireplace danced across her face. She smiled, her feet curled up in a foetal position underneath the covers. The image was domestic, far from the mask of Colonel Samantha Carter.

"You did," John said awkwardly, rubbing his head. He turned away from the desk and found himself next to the window, peering outside at the moonlit lake. She'd shown him the plans and schematics she'd drawn up for a potential weapon that could even their odds. She'd trusted him.

"But I didn't actually say the words," Sam pointed out. She propped herself slightly up on her elbow. "So…thank you."

John nodded in acknowledgment, not quite meeting her eyes, and looked back at the lake. It looked like the one in the SG-1 picture's background. A backward glance told him Sam's eyes had found the picture again. A glazed expression fell across her face like so many times before, and yet… not. Something was different. The distance between them didn't seem as great as it'd used to.

"You miss 'em?" he asked lowly. It was probably redundant, but the question slipped past his lips nonetheless. He was surprised, however, that the words didn't get stuck in his throat. It almost seemed to come naturally.

Sam broke off her gaze and met his eyes. A bright sheen shimmered in her eyes, illuminated by the flicker of light from the fireplace. The sight made John's neck tense. She'd never cried openly in front of him. It brought to mind those uncomfortable truths that Jackson had spoken earlier, and tightened the coil in his stomach.

"Yes," Sam said, her voice soft and thick. "Every day. Mark too. Most of my family's…"

John got it. He stared back at the lake, his jaw hard. He'd thought a bit about his own brother and various friends too, but going down that path…it just made what they were trying to do at present harder.

"When we got that call…" Sam hesitated. He could feel her eyes on him. It made the little hairs at the back of his neck stand up. "…I was really glad you weren't back there."

John froze. A shiver ran down his spine. Slowly, he tilted his head to face her. The words stopped in his throat again.

"In some ways we're lucky," Sam continued, half-smiling. She'd lowered herself back on the bed once more. "We've both got friends still here. Alive. We're not alone. That's…" She paused and gave the picture another shuddering look. A lone tear ran down her cheek. "That's what I need to hold on to. We're it. We're the last of us."

John didn't know what to do or say. For so long, there'd been an invisible wall between them that made this kind of talk difficult, not to mention that damn CO's mask Sam had always worn. Whether it was Sam's obvious tiredness and lack of sleep that lowered her inhibitions or something else, John didn't know, but he had no idea how to handle it. Change was difficult.

"We'll make it," John said in the end, when the silence had stretched out long enough for him to finally regain his speech. The words came out a bit more forcefully than he'd intended.

He turned from the window, arms crossed, his jaw tight. Sam shifted her stare from the flames dancing in the fireplace and met his – soft, gentle, vulnerable. She seemed to hold her breath, locking on to his eyes with a hesitance and emotion that sent another surge of  _something_ rolling around in his stomach.

John's newfound resolve hardened. "Whoever's responsible for Earth will pay. We'll get them, and we'll get the Wraith. We're survivors; we'll survive."

Another trail of tears ran down Sam's beautiful face, but in spite of that, she gave him a smile that reached her eyes. John felt as if – just for a moment – the elephant in the room disappeared, and the feeling was wonderful.

But reality sucked. As John walked back through the pouring rain to the stargate, he knew that it would probably never be like that again. The elephant was still there, and even if it wasn't... The feel of betrayal still lingered. It still hurt.

And he hated it. Because even though it hurt, those forgotten feelings were still there. Hidden deep in the dark. Testing his resolve. Waiting.

* * *

**Vocabulary**

_Abuela – '_ grandmother'

" _Los bravos a la plaza, y los mansos al corral"_ – "The fierce to the bullring go, the tame to the cattle pen" [Mexican proverb] – What Ramirez means is that he's fierce enough to go to the bullring while indicating that Reese's grandmother is too tame.

_Cojones –_ slang for 'balls'

_Maldito –_ 'damn'

* * *

  
**Next:** "The object of war."


	20. DAY 255, 257-258

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the super weapon construction moving ahead, Sam visits the Genii to resolve some unfinished business.

* * *

**NINETEEN | "The object of war."**

_"The war is waged by each ruling group against its own subjects, and the object of the war is not to make or prevent conquests of territory, but to keep the structure of society intact."_ **_–_ George Orwell, ** _**1984** _

* * *

**DAY 255**

"So this is the Ascalon?"

Caldwell's voice echoed suddenly inside the cave. Sam looked up from her laptop, which was connected to the data crystals recovered from the _Sun Tzu_ , and saw him step out of the passage leading to the surface. His eyes were wide in wonder. She smiled.

"One and only, sir," Hailey said, rolling out from under the massive device standing in the centre of the cave. Dressed in a grimy-looking jumpsuit, she got to her feet, took off her welder's mask and grinned. "Quite a feat, huh?"

"Impressive." Caldwell took his eyes off the device that was designed to fit outside a stargate. "How long until it's finished?"

"We've done what we can with the outer frame." Sam turned around in her chair and surveyed the device. "Only things missing are the thrusters and stargate. So now we've turned our attention to the second part: the Asgard-modified beam weapon."

She slid off the chair and walked over to what looked almost like a V12 engine, or at least a messy version of it. She ran a hand along the top and met Caldwell's eyes. "With the parts _Daedalus_ brought from Earth and what we salvaged from the _Sun Tzu,_ I estimate that we'll be done within a month. Hopefully."

"No sooner?" Coming closer to study the beam weapon, Caldwell frowned darkly.

"The fact that we've gotten to this point at all is a miracle," Sam said, sighing. Her eyes perused the smaller device, automatically noticing all the pieces that were missing or needed additional work. "Within a month's the best I can do. And that's _if_ we manage to get the rest of the parts we need. I have a deal with Larrin to check up on their progress on the _Aurora_ -ship upgrades in a few weeks. I'll see if she's found something on our shopping list." Sam looked at Caldwell and frowned. "What's the rush? Has something happened?"

Caldwell blew a breath and ran a hand across his balding head. "The superhive's gone below the radar. Again. And this time we can't pick it up, not even Atlantis. I don't like it."

"Think they figured out a way to mask their ZPMs' subspace signal?" Approaching them from the side, Hailey looked from Caldwell to Sam and back, biting her lip.

"I'm not sure that's even possible." Sam stared back at the data crystals from the _Sun Tzu_ that were spread all over her workbench, thinking. "The output is too strong to mask completely, so it must be something else. Temporary interference of some kind, or they're out of range of Atlantis's sensors, or…" She paused. Both Caldwell and Hailey looked at her. "Or they've also cut down to using a single ZPM."

Silence fell. For a tense moment, Sam met Hailey's eyes as Caldwell stared hard at the beam weapon. There was a deep crease in his forehead.

"While I'd like to think they're only working on a single ZPM, seeing as that'd make fighting them easier than before, I'd rather not rely on guesswork at this point." Caldwell gave both Sam and Hailey a scrutinising stare. "If the superhive doesn't show up soon, I'll get Xiaoyi to authorise an extended patrol of the outskirts of the galaxy and take _Daedalus_ to see if they've simply gone beyond our sensor range. But I don't like the thought of leaving Atlantis alone."

"Hence the Ascalon," Sam surmised. "We'll try to step it up. See if the Travelers or the Genii might've come up with something we need."

"Have you managed to set up a meeting with the Genii to discuss the mission with Commander Taron?" asked Caldwell, running a hand along the beam weapon.

"Yes, finally. Hailey confirmed it yesterday," Sam said. Withdrawing his hand to his side, Caldwell nodded in satisfaction. "We're gonna meet them in two days. Meanwhile, you should get John to run some specialised drills in the event of an attack on the city. In terms of our defensive capabilities, that should only leave McKay's shield upgrades."

"From what I hear, it's going well. Xiaoyi's given him extra resources to work solely on it."

"Oh?" Sam frowned. "What about his work on the _Sun Tzu_ computer download?"

"Reassigned to Dr Takahashi," Caldwell said. "Part of Xiaoyi's efficiency reforms. Every department has been divided into smaller sections for "better control", as she calls it. She's agreed to open up for more off-world missions, though, so I've been called in to supervise."

"You're kidding." Hailey's eyebrows rose in surprise. Caldwell's rose as well, and Hailey seemed to realise what she'd implied. "Uh—Sorry, sir, I didn't mean that _you…_ Um, what I mean is—"

"At ease, Captain. I'm sure we all appreciate Xiaoyi's change of heart." Sam repressed her smirk. Sometimes, it was nice to see parts of that upstart little cadet she'd met so many years ago. It brought back fond memories. She turned to Caldwell, who checked his watch. Visiting hours was over, it seemed. "I'll keep you posted. Good luck on your end."

"Thanks. I might need it."

The last was said with such poorly veiled displeasure that Sam struggled to contain a grin. As Caldwell left moments later via _Daedalus'_ Asgard transport beam, she turned to Hailey, who still looked rather embarrassed.

"Come on. Let's do what we can tonight, and maybe if we're lucky, John's gonna bring us the modulator we need this weekend."

That seemed to make Hailey's eyes suddenly twinkle innocently. "Do you think he'll stay overnight this time, ma'am?"

* * *

**DAY 257**

"She's managing to breathe on her own, so we've taken her off life support," Jennifer said with a smile above the chart she was currently taking notes on. "It's the same for most of the other Kadarian children."

"Does it mean she'll wake up soon?" John took his eyes off Reika for a moment to stare at the doctor, his eyebrows creased. Jennifer's smile faltered a little.

"It means it's up to her now," Jennifer continued in a lower voice. "Physically, she's as fine as she'll ever be, but we know too little to say anything about her mental state if or when she wakes up. We haven't dealt with Wraith feeding on children before. There's no telling how it'll affect their psychological state."

John's hands fisted upon the bed. As far as they knew, Wraith didn't go after children. Not much life in them. Which meant the Kadarian children were fed on as torture, or part of the same sick game that made the Wraith superhive annihilate nearly every colony world they came across in their damn civil war. It made him want to put a bullet between Todd's eyes, or whoever Wraith bastard was at the helm of that damn ship. He didn't care if that would kill him afterwards.

"Children are tough, though," Jennifer said, holding the chart against her chest. She smiled and brushed a lock of pale hair away from Reika's smooth face. "They're often better at bouncing back than adults. You'd be surprised."

"Let's hope so," John said, his voice low. He had to admit Reika looked almost like herself again, with only a slightly pale white hair colour to indicate what she'd been through. "You'll keep—"

"I'll keep you informed, Colonel," Jennifer said. Her eyes twinkled a little as if amused by something. It made John's neck tense self-consciously, and he awkwardly pulled his hands away from the bed and into his pants pockets. "If you'll excuse me, I need to check on my other patients."

John nodded, still tense about the knowing smirk on Jennifer's face. He didn't relax until she was well out of sight and earshot. Once he did, he pulled his hand out of his pocket and trailed a thumb down Reika's cheek. The ghost of a smile crossed his lips. "You're doing good, kiddo. Any day now, you hear?"

"Sheppard. You're here. Good."

The sudden voice made John startle. He snapped his hand back as if he'd just been caught red-handed, but the newcomer wasn't the slightest bit interested in his subordinate's show of sentimentality.

Caldwell lingered in the doorway, following a couple of nurses passing by with his eyes. Once they'd passed, Caldwell hurried inside and swept his hand over the door controls. He'd had already turned and approached Reika's bed when the door hit the frame, not sparing the girl even a cursory glance before settling his eyes on John.

"I need you to put together a black ops team. Search and rescue mission in an urban city environment. CQC expected. Top priority. _Daedalus_ will take you there. You leave in an hour." Caldwell already began to turn back towards the exit.

" _Excuse me?"_ John frowned. "What the hell's going on?"

"It's Carter." Staring across his shoulder, Caldwell's lips pressed together thinly, his eyes glinting.

Cold dread washed down John's spine. He hadn't seen Sam since his visit to Tirana a week ago when he'd found her sleeping on her desk. The vision of a grieving woman – his former… _something –_ had lodged itself firmly at the back of his mind since then. It was so different from the harsh looks she'd given him when she'd been nothing but the commander with a capital C. Since that night, sleep hadn't come easily. Too many memories and too many thoughts. They all came back now with the mention of a single name.

"The Genii?" he asked tensely.

"Yes. Two messengers arrived at Tirana fifty minutes ago." Caldwell's expression darkened considerably. "I'll brief you on the ship on the way there. Go get your team. Signal _Daedalus_ when you're ready to be beamed up. I'll notify Xiaoyi we're heading out."

With that, Caldwell left. For a stunned moment, John was rooted to the spot next to Reika's bed. Then he shook himself out of his stupor and ran.

* * *

"Now that we're all pleasantly gathered here, mind finally giving us the _whole_ story?" Colonel Sheppard paused in his restless pacing long enough to stare accusingly at the three people seated at the end of _Daedalus'_ conference table.

Reese hadn't seen him this agitated since…well, the aftermath of the Bhaati mission. The implications made her tense.

She skirted her eyes down to the woman with the downcast eyes at the end of the table. From what she'd figured out, the woman was Dahlia, the sister of Chief Ladon Radim. There were unshed tears in the woman's eyes and she struggled to meet Colonel Sheppard's. Instead, it was left to the man at her side, one Commander Verlo, to answer.

"The day after your mission with Commander Taron, Radim's Chief of Security, Rathorn, seized control of the Genii council." Unlike Dahlia, Verlo seemed grounded, balanced. There was an air of authority and experience around him. "With the council's backing and some carefully manufactured evidence, Rathorn declared Chief Radim a traitor, claiming he'd formed an alliance in secret with the Wraith faction owning the lab you hit. He has now been elected by the council as the new Chief of the Genii."

"Bastard," muttered Captain Hailey to Reese's right. She was sporting a black eye and some other bruises, sustained while escorting Colonel Carter to her meeting and the subsequent captivity. "I _told_ her something was up when we passed all those security checkpoints."

Sheppard gave the captain a pointed glare. Hailey snapped her mouth shut, and he turned back to the Genii. "What does he want with Sam? Not to mention, what the hell do _you_ want? You didn't get Hailey out of there and offer to help us get Sam without expecting _something_."

"Sheppard." Caldwell's tone spelled warning. Seated across from Verlo, the bald colonel's eyes were like icy steel.

Sheppard barely backed down. He faced steel with steel until Caldwell eventually decided to plainly ignore him.

"You said that Radim has been scheduled for public execution," Caldwell said, addressing the two Genii. Out of the corner of her eye, Reese watched Sheppard clench his fists, lock his jaw and resume his restless pacing. "When is it due?"

"Three days," Dahlia said, speaking up for the first time, her voice quivering. She looked up. "Colonel Sheppard is right, Colonel Caldwell. We – _I –_ have acted with another thought in mind. In exchange for rescuing Colonel Carter, we would like your help to free my brother."

"Chief Radim is currently locked up in a high security prison," said Verlo. "It would take an army to break him out with our kind of resources – an army we cannot spare at this time."

Reese frowned, puzzled about Verlo's turn of phrase. She opened her mouth, only to have Sheppard voice the question she'd wanted to ask. " _At this time_?"

Verlo nodded. "Chief Radim planned for an eventuality such as this. Our history has proved that staying in power for an entire lifetime is a tenuous hope at best."

"Yeah, I remember Cowen." Sheppard's lips curled into a look of distaste, his eyes meeting Ronon's in shared disgust across the table.

"Indeed." Verlo bowed his head in acknowledgement, then turned to Caldwell. "When Rathorn acted, several of Radim's closest went into hiding and were smuggled off the planet, including myself and Miss Radim. As of this moment, we are still gathering and positioning our forces, as well as preparing actions to retake control of the Genii capitol and depose Rathorn. As we proved with the rescue of Captain Hailey here, we have loyalists inserted everywhere, ready to assist us."

Verlo paused, then looked at Sheppard, who stopped pacing. "Rescuing Colonel Carter should be no problem. She is being kept in the Central Command building's lower levels and most likely undergoing interrogation. Rathorn wants to use her to gain control of Atlantis. That is what our sources tell us, at least." Verlo cleared his throat. "By the time we arrive at the planet, however, our people should be in position to escort her to safety."

"You just need to give the word, right?" Sheppard's expression darkened, his tone quieter but dangerous. It was clear what he was indicating: blackmail. Unless they helped free Radim, the Genii wouldn't help free Carter. Sheppard turned to Caldwell. "I say we beam her out of there and get the hell out of Dodge. Let them take care of their own messes."

"Sheppard," Caldwell warned again, his eyes steelier than before.

"I understand your reluctance, Colonel," Verlo said, turning slightly in his chair. "And for your sake, I wish it were that easy. However, Rathorn has most likely already removed the tracking device in Colonel Carter's body."

Reese's eyes widened. The subcutaneous transmitter was the only way for _Daedalus_ to safely lock onto a specific person, namely Atlanteans, to beam up. If the Genii had developed technology to counter that… Even she understood the implications.

There was a deep frown on Caldwell's face now, but he didn't say anything at first. When he did, he almost seemed to hold back a sigh. "Okay, Commander, you've made your case. In exchange for your help freeing Colonel Carter, we will help you free Radim."

Behind Reese, Sheppard made a noise, but Caldwell cut him off. "We'll reach the planet in less than twelve hours. Colonel, I want you to sit down with the Commander and devise a plan for Radim's rescue. I want it in my hand by 1600. Understood?"

There was a tense moment in which nothing happened. Reese didn't dare turn to see how Sheppard was responding. When he eventually spoke, however, his voice sounded clenched, as if he was holding back something piercing.

"Yes, sir."

* * *

"What's that?"

The voice interrupting him was quiet, timid even. John looked up to find Hailey in the doorway to his assigned crew quarters on _Daedalus_. She cradled her left side slightly, probably from that bullet impact on her armoured vest; Rathorn had shot her to set an example for Sam on the consequences of not complying. She'd been lucky she wore that vest.

John stared down at the multi-coloured cube in his hands. "Just something I've been working on. Nothing important." He found his bag and put the cube back in it, along with the pieces he had yet to attach. "Something on your mind, Captain?"

"I just wanted to make sure I'm going down there with the rest of you, sir." Hailey stepped inside the room, which was empty save for the two of them. Ronon was probably off somewhere letting out steam.

"You've been hurt, Captain, you should rest." John pushed to his feet, feeling an instinct to put distance between himself and the broken Rubik's cube in his bag.

"Would _you,_ sir?" Hailey countered, her eyes glinting defiantly. She put herself in the middle of his path.

John stopped, his lips thinning. Her words hit home. There'd been times when he'd refused to rest because he knew his people needed him. His _friends_ had needed him, like when Teyla had been trapped on Michael's Hive ship. Sam had tried to stop him then, but he would've gone anyway, so she'd let him, despite her obvious reservations. Was this any different?

"With all due respect, Colonel, I'm fine," continued Hailey. "A broken rib's nothing. Can barely feel it at all. I can still do my job. _Please_ , sir."

There was a genuine insistence in her eyes, along with something that resonated somewhere deep inside John's consciousness: fear. Fear that someone she…

"Fine," John said, quickly pushing past her into the corridor, not meeting her eyes again. "Don't make me regret it, Captain."

"I won't!" Hailey called after him, and he could practically _hear_ her smile as she ran off in the other direction.

* * *

Sheppard's plan was sound. Locking onto an unknown target in an unknown underground location was next to impossible without the Asgard's fully advanced sensor array. Only _Odyssey_ had been equipped with one of those before Earth fell, and that ship was MIA. Their own Asgard-modified sensors were nowhere as powerful, even when powered by a ZPM. As such, Sheppard's team would infiltrate the prison at night, secure Radim with a transmitter, and then be beamed out of there while Genii loyalists smuggled Carter out of captivity.

Simple. At least in theory… Caldwell had gone over the plan thrice, considering all the facts and factors that might come up. He had no formal objections. Even so, he found himself perusing it for the fourth time as a multitude of colours streamlined past the mess hall's windows. There was an itch he couldn't scratch. Something he couldn't put his finger on.

Or it could just be that he was generally worried.

He'd known Sam Carter for a long time, all the way back to Stargate Command. He'd discussed, planned, argued and bled with her, and then nine months ago they'd been pushed together further by the circumstances, bound by oath, secrets and duty. If something happened to her…he'd be alone. The undeniable and horrifying burden would be only his.

A sudden noise made Caldwell look up from his tablet computer.

Commander Verlo stood by the water dispenser unit, a glass in hand and an apologetic look on his face. "I am sorry, Colonel, I did not mean to disturb you. I was just getting a glass of water, but I don't seem to be doing this correctly."

"You push the glass against the handle," Caldwell explained, making the appropriate motion in the air. Verlo attempted it again and smiled when water poured out of the tap.

"Thank you, Colonel. Now I might rest a little better."

"Trouble sleeping?" Caldwell turned in his seat, letting his tablet computer go into sleep mode. "I imagine few Genii have spent a night in a ship like this."

"An understatement," said Verlo, taking a sip of water and approaching the windows overlooking the pocket of hyperspace they were travelling through. "Hive ships do not provide luxuries such as this."

"You've been on one before?"

"It is where I acquired this." Verlo turned, smiling grimly, and pointed to the jagged scar going down his jaw line. It tore straight through his beard, making him appear more grizzled than his forty-something age. "Six years ago, we were going to plant a bomb inside a dormant Hive ship, hoping to destroy it before the Wraith woke up again. We failed. The Wraith woke up before their time and thwarted our plans. Only a handful of us escaped."

Caldwell grimaced. Atlantis had been responsible for waking up the Wraith race. He had never felt the need to apologise, however. Things happened. You just had to deal with it and move on.

"I hope you understand that we did not want to use Colonel Carter's imprisonment against you, Colonel," Verlo said, twirling the now empty water glass in his hand. "Chief Radim would've strongly protested if he knew about it."

"You are in a difficult situation. Desperation makes people do things they wouldn't normally do. I understand," Caldwell said. Then his eyes narrowed. "Just to make myself clear, however… Once Radim and Carter are safe, the rest is up to you. If there's a prolonged civil war, we can take no part in it."

Verlo met his eyes with a serious look of his own. "Reasonable. From what my sources tell me, you have certain things of your own to deal with…" With a sudden knowing smile, Verlo began to walk towards the exit. "Have a good night, Colonel. Thank you for your honesty."

Staring after him, Caldwell frowned. The itch was back. With a slow motion, he reached for his tablet computer and turned it on again.

* * *

"Coming out of hyperspace in three-two-one-mark."

Outside the bridge windows, the multi-coloured spectrum of hyperspace turned to real space with millions of blinking stars all around. _Daedalus_ soared forwards before slowing down to a relative crawl, the planet before them growing larger during their approach.

"It looks different from up here," Dahlia Radim remarked, standing off to the side of the bridge, two Airmen behind her. Her eyes were wide in wonder. "So small."

If the situation wasn't so dire, Kevin Marks might've smiled. As it were, he only shared a look with Emma Cooper, who rolled her eyes.

"Sensor scans check out," Cooper reported, translating the information popping up on her screen. "No sign they've picked up our approach. The entry point provided by the Genii is clear."

"Move the ship into orbit," said Colonel Caldwell, glancing at Marks from his captain's chair. He then flicked a button on the chair's control panel. "Ground team, standby for transport."

" _Copy that._ " Sheppard's voice resounded in the bridge's speakers.

"We're in position," Marks said, running his fingers across his keyboard. In the windows, the Genii home world stopped growing larger as _Daedalus_ levelled out and slowed even further.

"Beam them down," Caldwell ordered.

It only took a moment, then the science officer said, "Transport complete."

"Keep a sensor lock on them at all times. If something goes wrong, I want you to get them out of there immediately."

"Aye, sir."

With some effort, Caldwell leaned back in his chair. Marks knew by experience the look on his CO's face. Sharing a look with Cooper, he waited, tense and all too aware that a Genii was currently standing not five feet from him.

* * *

Stepping out of the secret passageway used by Radim's loyalists to get in and out of the underground city, Reese felt a chill go down her spine. Beyond the factory district several levels below them, the Genii capitol spread out in the monstrous cavern, glittering in the semi-darkness like a dozen ant colonies. She'd never seen it before.

Nestled several miles underground, the city was made up of roughly nine major districts, with large suspension and arch bridges stretching between each of them on several levels. Hundreds of buildings in all sizes and shapes were wrapped around the huge stone pillars keeping the caverns from collapsing. In the artificial light, Reese could see pipelines stretch and curve everywhere she looked, connecting the districts, and huge waterfalls were roaring down from the city's underside into the abyss. Everything was massive cold rock, metal and steel, with mists and smoke rising from buildings and shadows like something taken out of a steam-punk comic.

"Terrifying, huh?" Hailey came up behind her, weapon in hand. "And kinda impressive."

"I hate caves," Reese said lowly.

Hailey chuckled. "Take a deep breath and think of baseball. Or Clooney. Whatever helps. Come on."

Rolling her eyes, Reese followed Hailey and the rest of the team down several ladders into the factory district. They wound up at ground level among some derelict, boarded-up buildings closest to the cavern wall. Behind one of the buildings, Sheppard held up his hand, signalling them to stop.

At the corner, Commander Verlo was gesturing for someone on the other side. Reese watched as a large group of Genii soldiers suddenly rounded the corner. These, however, looked far shabbier than she'd expected for such a militaristic society.

"Colonel Sheppard," Verlo said, "you know Officer Massan."

Next to Verlo, Cassel Massan was small, slight and completely unassuming. While his companions were dressed for combat, he wore just the standard Genii uniform with a blue strip of cloth tied around his left arm to signify his allegiance. From what Reese could see, he wasn't even armed.

"I've signalled our people," Massan said, his voice quiet. "They are in position to help us break out Colonel Carter. Rathorn has kept her in interrogation all day, but my sources report that she's in good health. Well, considering."

"She gets out in one piece," Sheppard stated evenly, his eyes dark.

"Of course, Colonel," said Verlo. "But we will have to move simultaneously. If we raise the alarm at either location beforehand, Rathorn might take more volatile actions."

"Fine." Sheppard turned around and waved to Hailey. "Captain, you'll go with them. I'll radio it to _Daedalus._ " At Reese's side, Hailey nodded sharply. Verlo opened his mouth to say something, but Sheppard cut him off. "Let's get a move on, people. Haven't got all day."

Although sharing a look with each other, Verlo and Massan said nothing further beyond splitting up and going in different directions. Hailey moved to follow when Sheppard held her back. Standing close by, Reese overheard him.

"You know these people, Captain. Anything smells funky – you find Colonel Carter and get the hell out of there. Understood?"

"Yes, sir."

"Alright, get going. Stay in touch." Hailey saluted him and then ran off to catch up to Massan's group. Turning away from her, Sheppard eyed the rest of them: Reese, Ronon and two Marines. Along with Verlo, they were Radim's rescue. "Keep your eyes peeled, people. This ain't Kansas."

* * *

Hailey had been in the Genii capitol many times before on diplomatic and scientific missions. _This_ side of it, however, was something she'd never expected to see.

Massan led her and the Genii team through a run-down, half-operational maintenance network going through the underbelly of the city. From the smell of it, Hailey wouldn't be surprised if the sewage system had started to seep into it in places. Three times, they had to cross narrow, wobbly suspension walkways to get from one district to another, until they finally got in sight of their target: the Command Centre.

The Command Centre housed the government, military logistics and planning HQ, and the intelligence offices – what would most likely be the Genii's CIA equivalent. Colonel Carter was held in the latter.

"Looks like Rathorn has boosted the security," Hailey said, crouching next to Massan. In the distance, the Command Centre rose like the natural focal point of the city. All over it, floodlights and guard patrols were systematically searching for any intruders, even though it was the middle of the night local time. "What's your game plan?"

"There is an access point on one of the sublevels," said Massan, pointing towards the lower parts of the building. Roaring waterfalls soared out from underneath it and into the abyss below. "It is an emergency exit leading from the section of the building containing the cells and interrogation offices. My sources on the inside will open it for us and then lead us to Colonel Carter."

"How do we get out?"

"Same way, in theory. If the alarm is raised, we will have to fight our way out."

"Wonderful," muttered Hailey.

Massan smiled. "Do not worry, Captain. Right now, I am sure Rathorn's eyes are on the prison. He is far more afraid of someone rescuing Chief Radim than an off-worlder. Especially so close to Radim's execution date."

"Right. Let's hope he got that memo." Hailey paused and watched as Massan got to his feet and began to move on, the Genii loyalist soldiers following in his wake. An uncomfortable sensation began to churn in her stomach.

By nature, Massan seemed like such an honest man. Rathorn had always seemed iffy, but Massan… He genuinely cared about Radim. She'd seen that first hand. Or, at least, that's what she thought she'd seen.

_I wonder if Sheppard's right. If there's something else going on that we don't know about. We know that's how they've operated before._

Getting to her feet, Hailey hurried up and caught up to Massan as he waited for two of his people to open a sealed bunker door. "Hey, can I ask you something?"

"Of course, Captain Hailey."

"Why did Rathorn need evidence to take down Radim? If he wanted the power, he could've just assassinated him. He was Radim's Chief of Security. Why go to all this trouble?"

"An very good question." Massan stroked his chin with his fingers. "I believe Rathorn wanted to avoid as much uproar as he could. Despite what it might look like, his forces are actually in minority. However, they currently control the nuclear reactor you helped us build, as well as the entire storage of nuclear explosives. It is what has mainly prevented us from acting sooner. In addition, I suspect he wants to win people over by seemingly giving Chief Radim a fair trial, as well as discredit him with the outrageous accusation that he's collaborating with the _Wraith_."

"And people buy it?" Hailey raised an eyebrow in disbelief.

"Some do. Others are scared, so they do nothing. But most are not stupid. His words might sound true and fair, but people have served under leaders like him before."

Hailey opened her mouth to reply, but with a loud groan, the heavy bunker door was finally swung open. Massan waved the other Genii ahead, and then picked up a pocket watch.

"I'm sorry, Captain, but we must move ahead." Massan replaced the pocket watch and indicated her to go first through the door. "Commander Verlo and Colonel Sheppard will already be at the prison. If you have further questions, they will have to wait."

* * *

The infiltration was going better than expected. Entering the high-security prison through a ventilation shaft, which originated on the maintenance level, had given them the first element of surprise. Verlo disabling the alarm and lights inside the prison had given them the second. It'd barely taken them ten minutes to get from sublevel 5 to sublevel 3 where Radim's cell was located.

Peeking around the corner to the end of the corridor, Ronon could see their final obstacle: four guards stationed in formation outside a heavy bunker door, two crouched low and two behind aiming high. Their faces were as clear as day thanks to his night vision goggles, revealing tense, attentive eyes and clenched jaws. Heavy shotguns were held tightly in their arms at eyelevel. Dangerous even at this distance.

Ronon leaned back into cover and signalled 'four' with his fingers, followed by 'two low, two high'. Opposite of him, Sheppard clenched his jaw and nodded curtly.

"Go high." The harsh whisper was a command.

Drawing up his energy weapons, Ronon counted to three and swung out of cover. The guards never knew what hit them. His two in the back were dead long before Sheppard's silenced P90 sprayed across those crouching in front.

The four guards collapsed in a single heap, those Sheppard had shot still moaning and very much alive. Striding quickly forwards, Ronon prepared to open fire again, but Sheppard ran past him, blocking his access. The next thing he knew, Sheppard slammed down on the surviving guards with the butt of his P90, effectively silencing them. He then kicked away the shotguns and began to drag the bodies out of the way.

The act made Ronon's eyebrows furrow. It wasn't like Sheppard to use excessive force, but the look on his face quelled Ronon's half-formed remark. Instead, he grabbed the closest dead guard and pulled him away from the door, helped by Captain Matthews and the two Marines.

Once their access was clear, Sheppard stepped in front of the door and clicked his radio. "Verlo, come in."

On the radio, the Verlo's voice came out in a slight garble, most likely due to the high density of metal in these walls; it messed up the signal. _"—erlo—what's—situation?"_

"We're at location Charlie," Sheppard said, eyeing the door without touching it. "Flip the killswitch."

"— _ill do—"_

Within seconds, Ronon heard the sudden stop of a low humming; the electrical currents running through the bunker door had been shut down. Sheppard spun the handle around and paused. Raising his weapon in readiness, Ronon nodded.

With one great heave, Sheppard swung the door open. They flooded inside, prepared to open fire – but it wasn't necessary. The sole occupant of the room was a beaten-up and dishevelled Ladon Radim. He raised his head tiredly.

"Well, you've looked better." Sheppard lit his flashlight and pulled up his night vision goggles. Ronon did the same. The transition from green to dark made him blink. "Cut him loose."

"Colonel Sheppard?" Radim's voice was cracked. He blinked confusedly as the two Marines stepped forward to loosen his bonds and pull him up. Matthews was at the door, keeping watch. "So they managed to convince you…"

"Something like that," Sheppard said, his voice tense. He turned and pulled up his radio, checking his watch as he did so. " _Daedalus_ , we've got him. Standing by."

" _We—onel."_ Like Verlo's, Caldwell's voice was also garbled, but even worse.

"Say again?" Sheppard frowned. " _Daedalus,_ we've got Radim. Get us out of here."

Only static sounded on the radio.

"Fuck," Sheppard muttered. "Something must be interfering with the signal."

"Radiation?" suggested Matthews. "This whole place is run on nuclear power, isn't it?"

"Yes, but that's not it," said Radim weakly, coughing hoarsely. "It's this room. Rathorn left a nuclear device in here, designed to slowly poison me. It's—" He coughed again, pointing to one of the corners of the room. "It's his way of torture."

Sheppard pointed his flashlight in Radim's indicated direction. The beam of light fell on a small device standing on a table.

"Oh, you're kidding me!"

"Matthews," Sheppard said sharply, silencing her. Ronon saw him work through their options in the dim light of the flashlight. "We need to get the hell out of here. Find a radiation-free spot so _Daedalus_ can beam us up."

"What about him?" Matthews asked, pointing at Radim. "And us? We've been exposed."

"The amounts should not be fatal for you," Radim said, sagging slightly in the arms of the two Marines. "It is one of the old nuclear devices we made before you gave us shielding technology. Its exposure is only incurable over time. If we leave now, your doctors should be able to treat you without any problems."

"Hear that? We'll be fine." Sheppard turned back towards the door and pulled on his night vision goggles again before switching off the flashlight. "Alright, change in plans, people. We'll exfil where we came in, try to re-establish contact with the ship once we get outside."

"Shouldn't we let Commander Verlo know?" Matthews asked, covering their exit as Sheppard led the way.

Sheppard didn't answer immediately. Ronon knew why. He was waiting for news.

* * *

Water splashed into her face. Sam startled into consciousness and struggled for a moment against bonds that dug into her arms and feet, gasping in sudden pain.

"Time to wake up, Colonel."

Recognising the voice, Sam gritted her teeth and forced herself to stop moving. She raised her head, finding her target leaning against a desk in the corner. Commander Gavorn, the new Chief Rathorn's head of the Intelligence Offices, had greying hair at his temples and an unblemished skin that belied his age – and his nature.

"I've got a little surprise for you," Gavorn said, gesturing to someone behind Sam. The heavy bunker door, which could only be opened from the inside, opened. "Recognise this young lady? She was caught trying to hide in the city along with some traitors."

Sam heard the shuffle of feet. Then someone was flung down on the floor in front of her feet; someone with a _very_ familiar groan of pain.

" _Hailey_?" Sam gasped. The captain's face was bruised, something it hadn't been when she'd been sent away from the meeting with the Genii council earlier that day. Sam swung her glare at Gavorn. "You bastard!"

Gavorn only grinned. "So _that_ is what it takes to get a reaction out of you. Excellent. We'll be done long before our guests arrive."

"Ma'am…" Hailey mumbled, clearly in pain. "Close your eyes."

Confused, Sam didn't understand the odd request until Hailey rolled over fully, exposing a flashbang grenade in her hands. She threw it away from her before continuing the roll into a foetus position with her ears covered.

In a split second, the room erupted into chaos. There was a loud bang and bright flashes of light. Sam couldn't protect her ears, which rang terribly in the aftermath. But she felt the vibrations of air pressure changing and heavy weights dropping down to the ground.

When she opened her eyes, Hailey was quickly undoing her bonds, a worried expression on her bruised face. The three Genii who'd interrogated Sam, including Gavorn, lay in bleeding heaps on the ground. To Sam's shock, Cassel Massan was checking each of them, popping a round in one guard's head when it turned out he wasn't dead yet.

"You okay, ma'am?" Hailey's voice sounded distant and muffled, but Sam could see her lips move. She simply nodded in reply, massaging her sore wrists as they sprung free.

Her legs shook as she stood up, and Hailey had to hold her steady as waves of dizziness washed over her. Eventually, however, Sam felt strength seep back into her muscles. She tried walking, observing Massan talking with three other Genii soldiers, who all wore a blue band around their upper arm. While still confused, Sam's mind was working quickly, trying to figure out the situation.

By the time the ringing had calmed down, Hailey was on the radio. "Hailey to Sheppard. We've got the package, sir."

" _Good work, Captain_." John's voice filtered back on Hailey's vest-attached radio. In the background, Sam heard gunfire and tensed.

"What's going on?" she asked, indicating the radio.

Catching her gesture, Hailey turned up the volume on her radio. "Package wants to know your sitrep, sir."

" _We've run into a snag. Original exfil is a no-go. Had to exfil the way we came. Tripped an alarm or something. Now got the whole damn garrison on our heel."_

"What about Chief Radim?" Massan asked, stepping close. Hailey repeated his question, using a code word in lieu of his name.

" _Package is in one piece. We're—Hold on."_ John's voice disappeared for a moment. Sam didn't realise she'd held her breath until he spoke again. He sounded annoyed. _"Got a radio message from Verlo. Tell his people to go to plan B."_

"Copy that," Hailey said, frowning confusedly at Massan. "What about—"

Suddenly, alarms began to blare out in the corridor.

Massan cursed. "They must have found the guards we knocked out earlier. Aleon, signal the others. For good or for worse, tell them it's time." As one of the Genii soldiers ran off, Massan turned to Sam and Hailey. "I'm sorry, Captain, Colonel, but I can no longer guarantee your safe escape. Our plans have just been forced to move ahead."

"What plans?" Hailey demanded. Sam frowned, paying close attention to the exchange. Massan looked hesitant, but it seemed to be a sufficient cue for Hailey. "No, don't tell me. You're gonna retake the city _now_? I thought you weren't ready! That's why _we're_ here, isn't it?"

"You are correct, Captain. Plan B wasn't supposed to be executed until Radim was safely off-world and our people were in position." Looking tense, Massan ran a hand through his hair. "However, the situation has forced our hand. We have no choice but to act now, even if we're at a disadvantage." Massan sighed. "I fear this will be a bloodbath."

"Not our concern. We were only tasked with helping you get Radim out in exchange for you helping us save the Colonel here," Hailey said, gritting her teeth. "Come on, ma'am, _Daedalus_ is in orbit. We need to get in touch with them and get them to—"

The ground and walls shook violently. Then the lights went out. Sam was almost knocked over as someone – she guessed Hailey – skipped a step and lost balance. Reacting instinctually, Sam steadied them both. Moments later, the shaking stopped and one of the Genii lit a flashlight.

"Plan B?" Sam asked, staring wide-eyed at Massan. Next to her, Hailey dug out her own flashlight and turned it on.

Massan nodded, straightening. His face, cast in shadows from Hailey's flashlight, was serious now. "More explosions will follow. As you can see, this one targeted this building's supplying power station." He sighed briefly. "But it will not be for long."

Even as he said it the lights came back on, flickering for the first few moments. Massan pulled out a sidearm and held it out to Sam. "You will need this to fight your way out to higher ground where your ship can transport you out, Colonel. The corridors will soon be crowded with Rathorn's men. Please try not to kill those with a blue band on their left arm."

"Wait, wait—" Hailey said as Sam accepted Massan's weapon. " _Daedalus's_ beams might be able to penetrate this far. Just let me get in touch with them."

"But my transmitter—" Sam began to say, but Hailey dug in her pocket and presented Sam with a small, capsule-shaped device.

Sam accepted it as Hailey clicked her radio. " _Daedalus_ , this is Hailey. We're ready for transport. Do you copy?"

No answer. Pocketing the transmitter inside her bra, Sam tensed again. _Could it be time already?_

" _Daedalus_ , this is Hailey. I've got the package and the Genii's already started their damn civil war. Do you read me?" Hailey's voice turned edgy. " _Daedalus,_ this is—"

Her radio crackled to life. " _All members of Ground Team, this is_ Daedalus. _We're under attack by the Wraith. Unable to transport at this time. Will contact you when it's clear. In the meantime, stay low. Keep the packages alive._ Daedalus _out."_

For a second, Hailey looked speechless. Then she lowered her radio. "You've gotta be fucking shitting me!"

* * *

"Anyone wanna tell me where these damn bogeys came from?" Caldwell's voice rang out amidst the occasional weapons impact. Holding on to his seat with one hand, he waved the other at the SOs, indicating they take Dahlia Radim off the bridge. She went willingly, though she stared back at him until she was out of sight.

"Must've dropped out of hyperspace right behind the star," Telman, the science officer, reported from the station behind the captain's chair. "The electromagnetic interference from the star would've interfered with our sensors until the ships came closer."

"Titan wing just lost a bird," Marks called out, eyes angled towards his screen. Outside the windows, the planet tilted out of view as _Daedalus_ swooped and swerved out of the plasma volleys coming from the closest Wraith cruiser.

"Any ZPM subspace signal from the Hive ship?" Caldwell asked, straightening as the ship levelled out and moved beyond the immediate firing range with a quick engine burst.

"No, sir, it looks like a regular Hive ship," Telman said. "Heads up. The second Wraith cruiser is powering up their weapons."

"Then fire up the plasma beam weapons." Caldwell turned to Marks, his eyes dark and serious. "Weapons free, Major. Take them down."

"Yes, sir."

Marks couldn't help smiling. Compared to the Wraith superhive, these Wraith ships wouldn't stand a chance against _Daedalus'_ ZPM-powered weapons and shields. He swung the ship around, locked onto the coordinates provided by Cooper, and fired.

* * *

" _John, this is Sam. Hailey's brought me up to speed. Looks like our exits are blown for now. What's your sitrep?"_

Crouched low underneath a window being shot to hell, John cursed as shards of glass flew all over him. "We're holed up pretty good in one of the civilian districts. Got a whole company coming down on us, though. Verlo's promised us back-up, but we've yet to see any."

"My people will come, Colonel," Verlo said, interjecting himself into the conversation. He'd rendezvoused with them after the prison alarm had been set off. He now sat behind a stack of crates, waiting for a lull in the firing. When it came, he rose slightly and delivered a couple of rounds out the window, letting the enemy know they weren't dead yet. "Give them a few minutes."

"That's what you said five minutes ago," John grumbled, before turning back to his radio. "We're just sitting tight for the moment, Sam. Once Verlo's people gets here, we'll fight our way to the surface. Still need to get the second package out of the city." John looked to where Radim was being treated by Matthews. He looked really bad. "How about you?"

" _About to exit the HQ structure. Tell Verlo the loyalist attack failed. Power's still online, but we've got a plan—"_

Sam stopped and John could hear muted shouts in the background. He waited, tensely, for her to continue. Looking around, he saw the others glance at him apprehensively in between shooting short bursts through the windows. Verlo's brows were furrowed deeply.

Finally, John couldn't wait anymore. "Sam?"

To his relief, she answered immediately. " _Damnit, they're everywhere…"_ The obvious annoyance in her tone made him smirk slightly. _"Alright, John. Get your package out safely. If you have to, stay put until_ Daedalus _can beam you up. Unless the superhive's up there, they'll be alright."_

John tensed, his frustration spiking again as he sensed a 'but' coming. "Sam…"

She ignored him. " _I'm taking my team to one of the locations the loyalists haven't been able to secure. Massan calls it Location H. Should bring this war to a quick stop. If our plan works."_

"Sam…" John warned again, clenching his fists. He'd known her long enough to know when she was about do something spur-of-the-moment, and given the situation, he had a really bad feeling about it.

" _You've got your orders, Colonel,"_ Sam said in a no-negotiable tone.

"… Aye, ma'am." Gritting his teeth, John counted to ten and turned off the radio. Becoming aware of his surroundings, he turned to Verlo with a dark tone. "What's location H?"

Verlo's face grew serious. "The nuclear power plant. It has become the main power supply for the entire city. And…it fuels Rathorn's new nuclear weapons project."

* * *

"Ma'am, Caldwell's mission objectives were crystal clear: save you and Radim, not get involved in their damn war!" Hailey cocked a new magazine into her P90 and fired a few suppressive shots down the centre aisle of the machine room.

"And who will get involved in ours?" Carter countered, crouched low behind a stack of crates. She pulled out one of the grenades Hailey had brought along, and pulled the pin. "We need the Genii, Hailey. They need us. That hasn't changed. We both know Rathorn won't consider a deal should he win this. But we already have an arrangement with Radim. Cover me!"

As Carter launched the grenade down the aisle, covered by Hailey, Massan immediately spoke up from where he was crouched behind her. "Chief Radim always honours his alliances."

Hailey only glared at him as shouts sounded at the other end of the room. A second later, the grenade blew up and the enemy fire drew to a sudden halt.

No one said anything for almost a whole minute. There were faint moans coming from where the grenade had detonated. One of the nearby machines was venting steam.

Hailey leaned out of cover, and then slowly got to her feet on the colonel's orders. Inching down the centre aisle, she led them to the enemy's location, where bodies lay strewn around at odd angles.

"Fan out," Carter ordered lowly, raising a Genii rifle to eyelevel. She took left, Hailey went right, and the loyalist Genii with them went down the middle.

Their search came up empty. All of Rathorn's guards in this room were down. Hailey watched as some of the loyalists went around, checking each body, and going as far as finishing off those who weren't dead yet. She felt sick.

"This is _wrong_ , ma'am," Hailey muttered lowly as she met up with Carter at the end of the room. She gestured back at the Genii loyalists.

Staring back in Hailey's indicated direction, Carter's lips thinned and her eyes glinted. "The lesser of two evils."

"Is it?" Hailey narrowed her eyes, which met Carter's steely ones.

"You have no idea," Carter said, lowering her voice considerably.

For a split second, there seemed to be a red tint in the colonel's eyes. Hailey almost took a step back. Then the moment passed and Carter's shoulders sagged a little. When she looked up, she seemed more like the colonel Hailey knew and cared about. The tired, but dedicated one.

"I know this isn't the ideal situation, Hailey," Carter said, running a hand through her dishevelled hair, "but there are plenty of reasons why we need to do this. The simple fact is that if Rathorn catches us, we're dead. No. More than dead."

Hailey frowned. There was something off about Carter. Her frustration with the situation was suddenly overpowered by worry. "Ma'am… What'd he _do_?"

Carter's face darkened again. "Let's just say, I expected the Wraith." With that, she quickly turned towards the nearby door; weapon nestled in the crook of her arm. "We need to move on. Rathorn's people will soon know we've taken this section. There's not much time."

* * *

"Hive ship is launching more Darts," Cooper reported from Caldwell's left.

Glancing at the Heads Up display on the bridge windows, Caldwell saw the red triangles burst out from the side of the largest red circle. "Relay their position to Titan wing."

"Sir…they're headed towards the planet." Frowning, Cooper ran her fingers across her keyboard, pulling up a closer view of the battlefield on her own screen. "At least three dozen."

"Just our luck to wind up in the middle of a culling," said Marks on the right, eyes on his screen as he manoeuvred _Daedalus_ through the spread of plasma shots across the battlefield. When one of the Wraith cruisers came into view, he punched a button and Caldwell could feel the discharge of Asgard beam weapons through the bridge floor.

The beams hit home, tearing through the cruiser like a spear. Before the other ships could retaliate, Marks had already moved _Daedalus_ out of the way. Caldwell spared only a second to appreciate his pilot's skills and enjoy the cruiser exploding everywhere in the bridge windows.

"Get me Ground Team on the radio," Caldwell ordered.

"Communications array took some chop in that last hit, sir," replied the comms officer, Gibson. "Compensating."

Once he received the go-ahead, Caldwell flicked a button on his armrest. "Ground Team, this is _Daedalus_. We've spotted about three-dozen Wraith Darts headed towards the planet. Might be a culling. Stay alert."

" _Like we didn't have enough to worry about,"_ Sheppard answered, his slightly garbled transmission from being underground cleared up by the ship's ZPM-boosted communications array. In the background, Caldwell could hear shouting and a lot of gunfire.

"Hang on, Colonel, we'll be with you in a moment. Got two more ships up here to handle before we can lower our shields and transport you up."

"Make that three, sir," Telman called out. "Long-range sensors are picking up a Hive ship entering hyperspace in this direction. ETA about twenty minutes."

"Any ZPM subspace readings?" Caldwell asked, his eyes paying close attention to the battlefield around them at the same time. Seeing an opening, he added, "Marks, target the last cruiser."

"No sign of a ZPM signal, sir," Telman said as Marks swung _Daedalus_ around to begin an attack course towards the remaining Wraith cruiser. It'd taken up a position between them and the Hive ship, obviously protecting it.

The news didn't calm Caldwell, however. A Wraith Hive ship with a single ZPM couldn't be tracked like the superhive. He'd have to see the ship with his own eyes before he was satisfied they could take it on.

"Sir, the Wraith Darts are attacking the Genii surface settlements," the Telman said. "Biometric scans show that they're beaming down ground troops. A lot of them. Looks like they might be headed underground."

Caldwell flicked on his radio again. "Ground Team, heads up. Seems the Wraith know there's people underground."

" _Copy that,"_ Carter responded this time. " _They're probably picking up the nuclear reactors. Means the Genii's main cover is blown."_

"Only if we let the Wraith transmit their location," Caldwell said. Outside the bridge windows, Marks had managed to position the _Daedalus_ and now fired off two rounds of the beam weapon. The remaining Wraith cruiser was torn to smithereens. Caldwell smiled. "We're targeting the Hive ship now. Stand by."

* * *

Signing off, Sam replaced the radio in her pocket and turned back towards the large coolant tanks.

Wedged between the tanks and the wall, her face flushed from the hot, humid air, Hailey gave her a narrowed stare. "Why didn't you tell him the Wraith are here for you?"

"Because he won't be able to do anything about it. He's got the Hive ship to worry about." Wiping off sweat from her brow, Sam picked up the pack of C4 she'd readied earlier and handed it to Hailey. "Make sure you wedge this in deep – we don't want anyone to spot these things prematurely in case they check the area."

"I know, I know." Rolling her eyes, Hailey shimmied back in behind the tanks, disappearing from view.

"Colonel Carter, we're done." One of the Genii loyalists that'd accompanied them, a young woman named Fay, approached her. "The explosives have been set where you wanted them."

"Good," Sam said, peering around the steam generator and coolant pumping room. She couldn't see any blinking red diodes, which meant the charges were hidden pretty well. Once they detonated them, it should bring down the entire room, as well as the ones on top of it.

After considering the heavy security in the nuclear power plant, this was their best option to relatively safely disable the nuclear reactor vessel that was placed on the floor above them. Given its weight and the force of its downward fall, the reactor would go straight through this level and into the water-processing dam underneath the building. That should keep it from overheating and melt down, as well as protect the population from any radiation leak.

Downside was that the Genii would have to go back to their previous types of power plants. Not that Sam minded. If Rathorn won, it'd be a serious blow to his plans. If it helped Radim win instead, she doubted he'd complain. Much.

"God, please tell me we're done." Hailey popped out from behind the coolant tanks. She ran her hand through her hair, plastering her wet bangs away from her face. "This is worse than the heat waves on Tirana."

Sam smirked and addressed Fay. "Let Massan know we're on our way back."

"Yes, Colonel," Fay said and moved away.

"I don't know about you, ma'am, but I need a spa day." Hailey went over to where she'd stripped off most of her gear to be able to get behind the tanks, and began to put it all back on. "Somewhere far, far away from crazy, gun-toting bastards and life-sucking vampires."

"Sounds wonderful," Sam said, picking up her Genii-borrowed weapon and the small detonator. She pocketed it and began moving towards the exit. "Tell you what, Hailey. Once we get out of here, I'll introduce you to this little place we found on M3X-266 that I always wanted to try—"

Behind them, a bunker door groaned open. Sam spun around, instinctually reaching for her weapon. She caught a glimpse of a man's shocked face and a three-barrelled shotgun before all hell broke loose.

* * *

"Cavalry's here!" Matthews shouted just as the sound of numerous guns joined in the firefight outside their shelter. Panicked shouts rose up as the sieging enemy was suddenly attacked from all sides.

"About damn time," John muttered, slamming his last mag into his P90. He glanced back at the ashen-faced Radim, who sat slumped against a crate, his eyes struggling to stay awake. "Hope you're ready to get the hell out of here."

"Colonel, I daresay that's an understatement." Radim attempted a smile, but it turned into a grimace as he began to cough raspingly.

"Chief!" Verlo, crouched nearby, immediately came to his side and began to hover.

Radim waved him off. "I'm—I'm all right, Commander. Please—return to your post."

"Looks like they're making short work of Rathorn's guys out there," Matthews said, regaining John's attention.

He leaned slightly out of cover. The captain was right. The Genii that'd surrounded their building and laid siege to them were crumbling to the ground one by one under the crossfire from Verlo's back up. The loyalists were coming down from all sides. Despite the hits they took, they pushed on until there were just a few stragglers clutching the wall opposite John's window.

"Take them down," John ordered, and his people opened fire. Ronon's shot crippled one, John downed the second, and one of the Marines, Stiles, killed off the last one with a shot to the head. Not seeing anyone else, John relaxed and rose fully to his feet. "Good work, people."

"I'm out," Matthews said, ejecting her empty ammo mag from her P90. "Anyone got spares?"

"Here, I got one." The second Marine, Ward, grabbed one mag from his vest pocket. John noticed he was bleeding from numerous small cuts on his head. Probably from broken glass. The rest of them seemed to be in one piece, thankfully. "Last one."

"Alright. Check your ammo and gear," John said, running a mental inventory on himself. He still had a couple of grenades, his sidearm and a pack of C4. "We probably haven't seen the last of Rathorn's people yet."

"Don't forget the Wraith." Ronon's quip was quick. He was smirking slightly, as he tended to do these days when he got to fight.

"I haven't," John said, slightly miffed. He rolled his shoulders and stretched his legs; glad to finally be able to move normally again. He didn't like to admit it, but he'd started to notice his body complained a bit more than before. "Commander, ready to move out?"

Stepping away from the window where he'd made contact with the loyalists on the outside, Verlo nodded. "Yes, Colonel. They will escort us back to the passageway. It seems to be our only option right now."

"Alright." John gestured to Ward. "Help the Commander with the Chief. I wanna be out of here before Rathorn figures out his attack's been—"

"Daedalus _, this is Hailey!"_ The captain's voice suddenly sounded on John's radio. She had to be on the general channel. " _I need immediate evac. The package is down. I repeat: the package is down!"_

John's heart stopped.

* * *

"We're unable to get a solid lock, sir," Telman called out from behind as the ship jolted slightly with weapons impact. "Sensors are picking up some radioactive interference from the nuclear reactor. I'm also reading multiple human and Wraith life signs converging on their location."

Caldwell cursed. Someone must've hit something critical down there during the firefight. "Captain, we cannot lock on due to a radiation leak. You need to get away from it before we can beam you out."

" _Say again? You're breaking up,_ Daedalus _."_ On the speakers, Hailey sounded didn't blame her.

" _Hailey, you need to get out of there_ now _,"_ Sheppard joined in on the conversation. _"Verlo's people say there are more soldiers on the way."_

" _Goddamnit!"_ Hailey cursed, her speech interrupted by grunts. " _All right, I'm getting her out of here. Wouldn't mind some back-up, though. The loyalists with me are all dead. And I can't raise Massan on the radio. It probably won't be long before the other guards realise one of their patrols are missing."_

"Daedalus, _Radim's been given a transmitter. Are you able to lock on his signal now and beam him out of here?"_

Caldwell looked back at Telman, who nodded in affirmative. "What're you thinking, Sheppard?"

" _Nuclear reactor's not far from where we are,"_ Sheppard said simply. " _Ronon, Matthews and I can be there in fifteen minutes tops."_

Staring at the Heads Up display, Caldwell watched as _Daedalus_ swerved in and out of firing range from the remaining Hive ship. If they destroyed the ship now, they'd have enough time to drop the shields and beam up Radim before the second Hive ship arrived.

Decision made, Caldwell flicked on the radio. "Okay, Colonel, we'll take it from here. Tell Chief Radim and the rest to find a safe location and stand by." He then turned to Marks. "Boost the plasma beam weapons by 30 % and target the ship's hyperdrive engines. Take it down _now._ "

"Aye, aye, sir."

* * *

"Oookay, easy now, ma'am. I'm just gonna put you down here for a moment." With some effort, Hailey eased the unconscious Carter down to the ground beside the bunker door, careful not to jostle her bleeding head too much. She'd been hit by a ricochet during the firefight and Hailey hadn't had time to bandage it yet. "Gotta make sure no one wants to come after us."

Free of the weight, Hailey rolled her shoulders to work out the kinks. Then she slung her backpack off and quickly found a couple of grenades, some C4 and a roll of wire. Recalling her training, she made a simple booby-trap in the doorway. The door went outwards, so when someone came through, they'd trip the wire and set off the grenades and C4. The whole thing took less than two minutes.

"Good thing you made us brush up on these skills on Tirana, Colonel," Hailey said as she picked up Carter again, holding her arm across her shoulders and dragging her through the room they were in as fast as she could. "You've certainly given me a number of opportunities to use them."

They were in some sort of storage room, a level down from the main nuclear reactor levels. Having entered the complex through here, Hailey knew they were about to exit outside at the other end of the room. From there, they'd have to follow a network of maintenance walkways on the underside of the building and finally cross a bridge to get to the neighbouring building complex.

Hailey put Carter down again before checking the outside, making sure it was clear. From the doorway, she could see parts of the city. It was on fire, literally. From the sounds of it, the loyalists were still blowing things up. She could also hear gunfire echo through the monstrous cavern.

"Damnit, ma'am, we really got into the thick of it this time," Hailey said as she returned for Carter. The colonel didn't answer, her bloodied head lolling at an awkward angle. Rolling her eyes, Hailey began to descend the staircase outside the door that led to the suspended maintenance walkways. "If we get out of this, I want more than one spa day. How about a raise? You get me Rathorn, and I'll blow his fucking—"

There was a loud _boom_ and a blast of shockwave hit them from behind. Hailey stumbled, Carter's weight dragging her down, and they crashed down the last few steps onto the walkway.

"Ow…" Hailey clutched her head. It'd hit the metal grating of the walkway pretty hard. She felt dizzy and a little nauseous. "Fuck, I didn't know they were so close behind. Get up, Jenn, get up!"

Groaning, Hailey rolled to her feet and quickly located her P90. She hastened up the staircase, taking in the scene inside the storage room. It was decimated. Storage crates were mixed with blackened human – and to her disgust, Wraith – limbs in the debris. The corridor leading back to the nuclear reactor complex was blocked.

"Ugh… Good news, ma'am." Hailey descended the steps, picking up Carter again, who seemed to have grown heavier in the last few moments. "Looks like they won't be able to get to us from the complex. Just wish I'd thought of that earlier. Might've saved us some time…"

Moving more slowly, Hailey bit down her pain and dragged Carter along the walkways. Every step made her muscles burn more and more, but she pushed on, her eyes set dead-on the narrow bridge in the distance that she had to reach. It was where Sheppard's team would meet her if everything went according to plan.

_Daedalus_ was a no go. A second Hive ship had turned up and there wasn't time or opportunity to beam them up until it'd been destroyed. But she could get to that bridge. She knew she could. Help would be there. And Carter, who was possibly the closest thing she had to family right now, would be saved. She just had to hold on.

"Hey, you there! Stop!"

Hailey briefly closed her eyes. _This is NOT my fucking lucky day._

* * *

"That's the door, but it's locked!" Verlo shouted, gesturing to a bunker door at the end of the water processing plant's main floor. "We could get it open, but first we'll have to take care of _those_." He reloaded and leaned out from cover to fire a suppressive shot at the soldiers and Wraith Drones scurrying into cover behind them.

Spraying an armband-less Genii soldier with bullets, John got back into cover as his team and Verlo's troops brought down the full force of their weapons on the few heads popping out behind pumping machines, containers and crates.

"There's no time," John shouted back, taking advantage of the moment to survey the path ahead. There was reasonable cover and he could make it in two sprints. "Cover me!"

Verlo's shout of "Suppressive fire!" barely rang out before John bolted out of cover and sprinted across the enemies' line of sight, a few straggling shots tailing him. He slid into cover behind one of the machines, regained his breath and gestured for Verlo to do it again. As the P90 and Genii gunshots rang out, John crossed the last few yards and crouched down next to the target door.

Making sure he was out of sight, John pulled out his last pack of C4 and tore off parts of it, molding it between his fingers. Eying the lock on the door, he reached up and fastened the strip of C4 around it.

Three whistling shots impacted right above his head, making John flinch back into cover. He found a simple detonator and timed his move to the lapse in gunfire. In less than a minute, John moved away from the door, detonator in hand, and pushed the button.

The shockwave was minute, but rattled his head nonetheless. Turning, John saw his work had done the trick. Half the door had been blown off its hinges. "Door's open!"

"Suppressive fire! Keep those damn traitors and Wraiths back!" Verlo's shout rang out amidst the gunfire, and then John saw him leap out of cover and sprint the whole way to the door, followed closely by Ronon and Matthews. He skidded to a halt next to John, crouching down as another stray shot hit dangerously close to his head. "Nice job," he nodded to the door. "Now I see why Chief Radim's always spoken so highly of your explosives."

"Yeah, he asks nicely. Every time." John reloaded his P90 and met Verlo's eyes. "So through there?"

"Yes," said Verlo. "There are service tunnels on the other side. They'll lead us straight to where we will rendezvous with Captain Hailey."

"Okay. Lead the way."

They left the raging gunfire behind, retreating into the bunker on the other side of the blown door. While John and Ronon made sure the room was clear, Verlo closed what was left of the door, partly shutting the sounds out, and then gestured to a nearby window.

"Down there," said Verlo, slightly out of breath. He pointed at the bridge about three levels below and east of them. "That's the maintenance bridge. Leads over to the main power plant—"

"Colonel!"

John tensed. He saw immediately what made Matthews call out. On the other side of the abyss, Hailey was hurrying down a staircase leading to the bridge, dragging Sam along with her. But she kept staring back and John could see why.

A team of Genii soldiers were hunting them, quickly sprinting the maze of maintenance walkways. One of them fired off a few shots, but they seemed to be in warning only as none of them hit.

"They won't make it," Matthews said, her eyes wide in worry.

John agreed. Hailey looked tired, and supporting someone else's weight while trying to dodge an enemy in pursuit was damn near impossible with that short distance between them. There weren't that many options. Only one, in fact.

John turned on his radio. "Hailey, this is Sheppard. We've got eyes on you." Even at this distance, he could see her turn around looking for him. "You can't outrun them. Stop and let them take you. We're coming for you."

" _I—blocked—the—way—back,"_ Hailey gasped in heavy breaths. _"They'll—have—to—go—in—your—direction. Perfect—ambush—sir."_

"Copy that, Captain. We're on the way."

* * *

Hailey slowed down when she reached the bridge, eased Carter to the ground, and raised her arms above her head in surrender. Her lungs were burning, her legs shaking from the exertion. Blinking stars appeared in her vision, and she forced herself to take slower breaths.

The Genii soldiers soon caught up with her: one officer and three more grunts. They surrounded her, weapons raised.

"Stand still," the officer ordered, holding his sidearm trained on her. Then he nodded his head towards her. "Vasily."

One of the male soldiers stepped forward, disarmed Hailey and forced her to kneel down beside Carter. Her head swam a little, still dizzy from the fall earlier.

She watched quietly as Vasily leaned down and searched Carter's pockets for any hidden weapons. Finding her combat knife, he threw it over the side of the bridge, but he kept her sidearm for himself. The detonator, which Hailey tried not to seem too interested in, was given to the officer. He stared at it for a moment before pocketing it.

"You're Atlantean," the officer said, peering at her closely. "Why're you here? What's your mission?"

Hailey only stared at him, slowly beginning to get her breath under control.

"That's not going to work, sir. She's a fighter, this one." One of the other soldiers, a woman, sneered above the barrel of her shotgun. "Gotta use force."

"Perhaps." The officer looked around, stopping when he heard the echoes of gunfire coming from the water processing plant across the abyss. "But this is not the best location."

"And where should we go? The way back's a mess," Vasily said.

"That building. We can hold it with just the four of us." The officer nodded towards the small building on the other side of the bridge while he found his radio. Hailey recognised it as a secondary pumping station. "Tomas, check it out. I will call it in. We will need a safe path to the Command Centre, and Chief Rathorn will want to know the Atlanteans are here."

As Tomas, the second male soldier, moved off across the bridge, the woman narrowed her eyes at Carter. "You know, I think I've seen that one before." She stepped forward and rolled Carter onto her back. She looked shocked at first, then gleeful. "It's that leader of theirs. Carter something."

"Are you sure?" The officer asked, holding the radio away from his mouth.

The woman stared at Hailey, who clenched her teeth in defiance. She grinned. "Let's find out."

* * *

"Looks like they can hear our little gunfight," John said lowly, cocking his P90. They'd reached another window to check on Hailey and Sam's situation. The officer was staring in their direction. "So much for the element of surprise."

Verlo narrowed his eyes. "There's still a chance. I recognise the man. He's got a reputation for being cautious, so he'll most likely send out a scout before moving on. Which means they'll be trapped down there."

"Not exactly a tactical position," Matthews pointed out, frowning.

"I didn't say he's the brightest." Verlo smirked. He pulled out his radio and hailed his 2IC. "Gavin, how's the situation back there?"

The static of the radio wavered for each gunshot ringing out. " _We've got them pinned down, sir. Team three managed to cut off their exit and teams two and five are moving to outflank them."_

"Good, take them down. All of them. Whatever means necessary. I need this place to go silent very soon."

While Verlo gave his orders in the background, John stared at the bridge. The officer had, as Verlo suspected, sent one of the male soldiers ahead as a scout. The rest of them just remained on the far side of the bridge, eyes on Hailey and Sam. But none of the Genii held his attention for long.

From this vantage point, John could see Sam clearly, even in the poor lighting. Having been turned on her back, she lay slumped on the bridge's floor, unconscious. There was blood all over her face.

Then the female soldier struck Sam's head with the butt of her shotgun.

"Fuck!" Matthews cursed.

John surged forward, only to realise he was too far away and trapped in this damn bunker-like building. Before he could do anything else, Hailey had jumped to her feet and was in the Genii's face, clearly raging. It only earned her a whip of the soldier's gun, but Hailey stood her ground, noticeably protecting Sam from further abuse.

"You think they managed to set the explosives before they were—" Verlo stopped when he saw what was going on. "Oh d—"

"We need to move," John said, moving away from the window and straight for the door he'd spotted earlier. He noticed that, in the background, the gunfire was becoming sparser.

"Yeah," said Verlo, quickly regaining his composure. He caught up with John and the rest as the former wrenched the door open, revealing a staircase that went five levels down. "It's not far. Just look out for that—"

"Scout. Got it," John finished for him, his blood pounding in his ears. He forced himself to breathe evenly, to resume that careful frostiness he'd gained with experience.

_Hang on, you two._

* * *

She knew Sheppard's team was right around the corner. Logically, she knew that what she'd just done was crazy, but Hailey wasn't thinking straight. She'd just reacted, and now that damn Genii woman was laughing straight into her face. Hailey wanted to kill her.

"I told you she's a fighter." The woman looked over at the officer. To the side, Vasily was grinning.

"She's also Carter's aide," the officer said, replacing his radio in one of his pockets. "Command just confirmed it. These are VIP targets. Chief Rathorn has dispatched two columns to ensure Carter's capture."

"Not this one?" The woman bumped her shotgun into Hailey's shoulder with a little force. Hailey winced, but remained defiant and glared up at her.

_Sheppard's coming,_ she told herself. _Just hold on. Don't do something crazy…again._

The officer looked her over, frowning. "Non-essential."

… _Fuck._

* * *

John met Ronon's eyes in the dimness. They were shielded behind two pieces of machinery that pumped water from the cavern lake below the city to the adjoining processing plant. Nearby, almost completely stealthy, was the enemy scout.

John held up his hand, telling Ronon to stay put, before leaning up slightly to peer between two pipes to see the scout's approach. He was headed straight for them.

Slowly, with great care, John positioned himself. This would have to go down silently. This building was too close to the bridge. If the enemy Genii heard gunfire, they'd turn tail and hunker down on the other side. Going across the bridge then would be suicide.

Holding his breath, John let the scout pass them, then sneaked up behind him. In one brutal motion, he snapped the scout's neck with a resounding _crack_. He went with the body, easing and silencing its fall, and then pulled it out of sight.

"Efficient," said Verlo quietly, standing up from his hiding spot along with Matthews.

John let out the breath he'd been holding, feeling his heart thudding hard against his ribs. He stared at the body of the scout for a long time, then looked up to face Ronon's grim features. "Only three to—"

A gunshot rang out.

* * *

Distantly, a gunshot rang out. Someone screamed. Then another shot. Silence, save for the sound of roaring water.

A cold, humid draft rose from the nearby waterfalls pouring down into the cavern lakes more than a mile below them. Sam could see the lights of the Genii underground city glimmer in the darkness as she struggled out of unconsciousness. One of her eyes wouldn't quite open. A warm trickle down her nose told her it was blood, probably in the process of clotting.

_How long…?_

Sam tried to blink away the crust, but it only made it worse. Squeezing her eye shut, she kept the other open and tried to ignore the throbbing pain in her head.

"Isn't it pathetic, sir?" A rasping voice spoke up suddenly at the edges of her fuzzy mind.

Sam turned her head, spotting a shadow moving slightly in the dimness opposite of her. Slowly, it solidified, turning into a Genii soldier. He was leaning against the railing opposite of her, a bloody bandage tied around his arm. When she tried to focus on him, he openly leered.

"My, my. How the mighty have fallen."

"Yes," someone agreed. Sam tilted her head sideways and saw a spotlessly dressed Genii officer, who returned to watching what Sam now realised was the narrow bridge she and Hailey had used earlier to infiltrate the nuclear power plant along with the Genii loyalists.

_Hailey._

Suddenly panicked, Sam shot up, to the immediate sound of a cocked gun.

"Stay right there, Colonel." The officer had turned on the spot and had his three-barrelled shotgun trained on her in one smooth motion. The soldier was slower, but he soon shoved Sam back hard with the barrel of his rifle.

For a moment, she felt nothing but cold air rushing up against her back. Then the railing of the bridge was there, halting her fall, and air filled her lungs. Sam bit back a moan and fought to calm her suddenly racing heart. Her mind felt like it was full of mud.

Somewhere, a bunker door slammed shut.

Forcing as much toughness as she could into her voice, Sam turned to the officer. "Where is she?"

"No one gave you permission to speak, _Colonel._ " Face twisted in a grimace, the soldier surged forward again – only to halt at the officer's abrupt stopping gesture.

"The Chief wants her able to talk, Vasily," the officer said, ignoring Sam as he faced off with his subordinate.

"Can't see why," a third voice chimed in. Sam glanced sideways to see a burly female soldier approach them from the other side of the bridge with a grenade launcher slung over her back and a shotgun in her arms. There were blood splatters all over her face. "Just kill her. If she's working with that bastard, it'll get him out of hiding."

"And the might of Atlantis behind him." The officer turned to the female soldier, unsurprised by her arrival. He gestured to the vast city tucked inside the cavern. Some parts were lit up in flames, Sam saw now. Distantly, she even thought she could hear the sound of gunfire. "This will be nothing if her people learns she's dead. Alive, she's of use."

"A shame." The female soldier only shrugged. Then she met Sam's eyes and grinned. "I wouldn't mind putting a bullet in her head." With slow, deliberate steps, she approached Sam, leaning down until her foul breath was inches away from Sam's face. "Like I did her friend just now."

* * *

"Colonel—" Verlo said warningly, but John didn't listen. He'd already crossed to the end of the room and wrenched the door open and hurried inside an identical machine room. It was empty, so he hurried to the next door. Before he could open it, however, Verlo restrained him. "Wait!"

"I can't." John pushed him off, going for the door. He was faster than Verlo's second lunge for his arm, managing to wrench it open and enter in one smooth motion.

But then he stopped.

In the middle of the barely lit room, Hailey laid in a rapidly growing pool of her own blood. She was wheezing, her eyes barely open as she noticed John in the doorway.

"Col—" She coughed, blood spilling out of her mouth. She was clutching her stomach, her hands bright red and shining eerily in the dim light. "Fucking—twice—"

Her eyes closed.

Shocked into steely discipline, John checked the room quickly with Ronon and Matthews before crouching down beside Hailey. There was still a pulse, but it was unstable. She'd been hit twice, both times with a shotgun – that much was clear. While her armoured vest seemed to have taken the brunt of it, some of the pellets had managed to sneak around the edges.

"Damn," John muttered as he tore off Hailey's vest, jacket and armour. Blood oozed out over his hands as he felt for the entrance wounds. "You couldn't have waited a couple of years, captain?"

There was no answer.

John blew out a breath and used Hailey's jacket to press on the wounds. Beside him, Matthews and Ronon stood quietly; the latter's expression murderous.

"The female soldier is returning to the others, and it looks like Colonel Carter has regained consciousness," Verlo said, peering out a nearby window. "Colonel Sheppard, this is our chance. Their attention is—"

John was already on his feet. He'd found his field medkit and now flung it towards a stunned Matthews. "Put pressure on her wounds and radio _Daedalus_. Verlo, get your back-up down here _now_. I'm going out there."

Striding towards the door, John cocked his weapon and made sure he had a full clip loaded. Ronon followed without a word. John paused for a moment and looked back at Verlo, who was now crouched down next to Hailey and Matthews. " _She_ lives, you got it?"

Sam would kill him otherwise.

"You have my word, Sheppard." Verlo used one hand to help Matthews press hard on Hailey's wounds while the other picked up his radio. "Go."

Nodding curtly, John turned and exited the building.

On the other side of the bridge, the Genii woman was approaching Sam, a shotgun in her arms. John tensed, bringing his sidearm to eyelevel as the woman leaned down into Sam's face, talking to her. His finger found the trigger, preparing to fire as he saw Sam glance sideways towards him—

—and then Sam's hands locked around the Genii woman's head, and she kicked out the feet from under her, pulling her to the edge of the bridge with a roar and strength John didn't know she possessed.

Before the other Genii had a chance to react, Sam began to bash the woman's head into the metal grating. At the glint of raised weapons, John and Ronon immediately zeroed in and pulled the trigger. The officer went down with one red energy shot, his shotgun clattering to the edge of the bridge before soaring down into the abyss. The second soldier turned towards the source of the gunshot, his rifle raised, and John let out four consecutive shots. In a silent yell, the man fell down to his knees.

But he was still moving. In slow motion, John watched him struggle back to an upright position and he didn't think. He squeezed the trigger again and again, until the man – finally – lay slumped against the railing with unstaring open eyes.

Coming out of his stupor, John heard his heart pounding fast and hard. He let out a breath he hadn't realised he was holding, and swept his eyes back to Sam. She sat back from what looked like a bloody mess, and met John's eyes.

A million emotions surged through him. John's face remained stoic, his neck tense, as he lowered his weapon.

* * *

"This one's a top priority," Verlo told the medical officer leaning over Captain Hailey's unmoving form. Before this mission, Dahlia had told him to do whatever he could to ensure the relations between Atlantis and the Genii were left strong. Given the captain's courage – _and_ Sheppard's veiled warning – it was the least he could do. The Atlantean captain, Matthews, paid close attention to them. Apparently, their ship wasn't able to beam them up yet.

"Sir, we've got reports from the other groups in the city." Gavin, his 2IC, approached him. "They're facing heavy resistance, but they're in position for stage three."

Verlo glanced towards the window and sighed. He'd never gotten an answer whether Colonel Carter had managed to put the charges in place or not. "Tell them to hold out. I'll check the situation."

"Yes, sir." Gavin retreated to a corner, issuing orders through his radio to the other pockets of loyalists in the city. Verlo watched as the medical officer continued his treatment of Captain Hailey, Matthews hovering nearby, and then turned towards the exit.

There were three Genii bodies on the metal bridge. An unharmed Colonel Sheppard was searching the officer's pockets while Colonel Carter sat in the background, eyes closed, and Ronon covered them. She looked beaten up, but on his approach she opened her good eye and gave him a fierce look.

"What's the situation?" Carter asked, wincing as she tried to get to her feet.

Curiously, Verlo had expected Sheppard to be at her side immediately to offer his support, especially given his previous erratic – and perhaps foolhardy – behaviour, but he remained where he was, turning the dead officer's pockets inside-out.

"Rathorn's people are putting up a very strong resistance, but our people are ready." Verlo hesitated for a moment, feeling bad for the woman struggling to her feet. "Eh, did you manage to—"

"Found it," Sheppard interjected. He stood up and showed them a black box in his hands that looked a little like the Atlanteans' radios.

Carter smiled. "We better get to a safe distance, Commander. Rathorn won't be able to ignore this."

* * *

On the Heads Up display, the plasma beam weapons tore through the Wraith Hive ship's aft section. One part of the ship broke off, the hit triggering secondary explosions spreading out from the point of impact. For good measure, Marks sent off another shot of the Asgard weapons and watched as the beam hit home. The Hive ship exploded in a burst of energy, silently but grotesquely beautiful.

Cheers sounded on the bridge.

"Status update," Caldwell said out loud, breaking through the cheers.

"Shields at 53 %, missiles and railgun ammunition down by 40 %," Marks reported, pulling up the necessary information on his screen.

"Minor hull damages on aft and starboard sections," Telman said from the science station behind them. "A few electrical fires, but they're under control. No casualties."

"We lost an F302, but the pilot managed to get out," Marks continued. "He's been recovered. Titan wing is returning to ship."

When no one else said anything, Caldwell's face finally lost some of the tension in it and he gave everyone a small smile. "Good work, everyone."

Marks shared a grin with Cooper. _This_ was how fighting the Wraith with a ZPM-powered _Daedalus_ was supposed to be. Perhaps the time had finally come when they didn't have to get their asses kicked without a fight.

"Sir, I'm reading multiple explosions beneath the planet's surface," Telman said, his voice sobering. It brought them back to business again. "Power outputs from the underground city have just gone dark."

"Get me Sheppard on the radio," Caldwell ordered, returning his stare to the Heads Up display. Giving him a better view, Marks moved the ship through the debris field over the planet and entered a geosynchronous orbit. "Colonel Sheppard, this is _Daedalus_. What's going on down there?"

It took a moment before there was a reply. " _Sending Rathorn a message. And most likely handing Radim his victory on a silver platter."_ But Sheppard didn't sound happy about it. Marks didn't understand why until his next words. _"You all done up there? We've got casualties."_

Any good feeling they'd felt was gone. Caldwell's eyes darkened. "Stand by, Colonel. We'll have you up in a second."

The colonel turned to Marks, who didn't need any extra orders. He quickly brought down the shields, and Telman completed the circle.

"I've transported them directly to the infirmary." Telman's voice was quiet, sombre.

No one said anything for a moment. Then Caldwell sighed and rubbed the ridge of his nose. "Stand down battle stations."

* * *

**DAY 258**

"Rathorn was able to escape through the stargate, along with about a platoon of soldiers and the councilmen who'd been working with him," John said, staring at his own fingers drumming on top of the table.

He was in _Daedalus'_ briefing room, having cleaned up and gone through the resident doctor's post-mission check-ups. The other members of his team, with the exception of Sam and Hailey who were in the infirmary, had already left following the standard debrief. Now it was just the two of them: him and Caldwell, whose demeanour was solemn.

"Verlo says the surviving Wraith ground troops went with him, along with about a third of the Genii's nuclear warheads. His people managed to see the gate address before the stargate closed, but when they checked the other planet, Rathorn was long gone."

"A waypoint," Caldwell noted.

John stopped drumming his fingers, instead fisting them restlessly. "Yeah."

"Well, _Daedalus_ will keep monitoring the Genii home world in case the Wraith return. Otherwise the Genii will have to relocate to one of their colonies, if they have one." Caldwell sighed slightly and leaned back in his chair. "I'll have Carter put out the word on Rathorn once she's back on her feet. If a Genii has started to collaborate with the Wraith, something's up. Since the same Genii wanted to capture Carter, chances are that it's got something to do with Atlantis. Or at least us."

"When hasn't it?" John countered, feeling annoyed. "Every damn year, there's something new. We never get any rest, do we?"

Caldwell eyed him quietly, causing John to look away. Unconsciously, his fingers began to drum again. The room was silent, awkward even, for a minute before Caldwell broke the silence.

"At least our alliance with the Genii is strengthened. Before Dr Hendricks cleared him for return to the planet along with a radiation treatment plan, Radim made a promise that whatever we need, we'll get it. He was very appreciative."

"Good for him." John's hand fisted again as his teeth gritted. "That's why we do this. To please Ladon Radim."

At that, Caldwell raised an eyebrow. "Sheppard—"

"I know, I know," John interjected quickly, knowing he'd let too much slip. He pushed away from the table and got to his feet. He couldn't dampen the sarcasm in his tone, however. "Today's a great victory, given the shitty circumstances we wound up in. Thank you, sir. I'll keep that in mind."

He began to walk away towards the exit, but Caldwell's second insistent "Sheppard" made him stop and sigh.

Without turning back, John said tersely, "Hailey's in bad shape. Your doc may be good, but she'll need to go to Atlantis to recuperate. What's your cover story with Xiaoyi?"

"Responding to an imminent Wraith attack on a friendly planet, as relayed by one of 'my' informants," Caldwell said. It was clear that he was allowing John to change the subject. Why, he didn't know. "My crew is already altering records in case someone's checking."

"Lucky for you the Wraith showed up, then." John looked across his shoulder, raising an eyebrow. "And how does that explain Hailey's bullet wounds?"

Caldwell's lips thinned. "Friendly fire."

John snorted humourlessly, turning back towards the exit. "Not far off, is it?"

* * *

The _Daedalus_ infirmary was dimmed and quiet save for the heartbeat monitor doling out monotone sounds. At least they told Sam it wasn't time to lose hope. Hailey could still get through this. The doctor seemed to think so.

"You should get some sleep."

Sam took her eyes off Hailey's still form and glanced towards the entrance. John, showered and changed, shuffled inside with his hands deep in his pockets. He stopped at the end of her bed, skirting his eyes towards Hailey.

"She'll be here in the morning."

"I know." Sam sighed, lowering her bandaged head to the pillow, and stared at the ceiling. "I just can't relax. It's my fault she got hurt. We should've just waited for _Daedalus_ to beam us out."

John eyed her for a moment, rolling a little uneasily on the balls of his feet. "How's the head?"

"Numb. Concussed." Sam chuckled humourlessly, noting that John had effortlessly dodged the pitfall of whether or not she was to blame. He was good at that. "Doc pumped me full of painkillers. Can't feel much."

"Yeah, know the feeling." John ran a hand through his hair, not quite meeting her eyes. The sight of that familiar action sent a real smile to Sam's face. As silence fell between them, however, she sobered.

"What's the sitrep on Rathorn?"

"Missing, along with his Wraith buddies," John said. "But you shouldn't worry about that now. You've been through a lot the past thirty-six hours. You need rest. A break."

Those words made her eyes begin to burn suddenly, and Sam stared back at Hailey. She looked so frail and vulnerable. "I promised her a spa day."

"You can take her when she gets better."

John's voice was quiet, but it was clear that he was uncomfortable. He shifted on his feet, his eyes skirting back and forth. For a moment, Sam desperately wanted him to hold her. But she couldn't ask. She didn't dare. Instead she squeezed her eyes shut, willing back the tears that threatened to fall.

Silence filled the room again. Hailey's heartbeat monitor beeped steadily. Neither Sam nor John made a move. Only when she felt her emotions were back under control, Sam opened her eyes.

John was staring at her, his dark eyes filled with indiscernable emotion, his lips thinned and his brows furrowed. It was just like when they'd faced each other on the maintenance bridge. Like then, Sam felt a chill run down her spine and her heart skipped a beat. Too many emotions passed between them. The air became heavy and oppressive.

"You're angry with me," she said, her voice almost a whisper. John raised a sarcastic eyebrow as if saying ' _really?'_ "Because of Hailey?" He didn't reply. "What is it then?"

John's jaw tightened and he withdrew his eyes, resorting instead to pacing. Sam watched him go back and forth several times, seemingly fighting with himself, before he finally stopped and glared at her.

"Talk to me, John." Sam's eyes began to water again. So many things were still unsaid. Right now, she couldn't handle another secret. "Please."

"I _am_ mad at you," John said simply, pointing his finger at her almost childishly.

He was still holding back, though. She could see it. Feel it. He was struggling. Why he didn't just let it all go, she didn't know. She knew she deserved it. She'd deserved it for a long time.

"You're my CO, Sam," John continued, still speaking in a frustrated tone. "You've pulled some crazy shit this past year, but also done a lot of good things. Because of that, if you say 'jump', I'll say 'how high'. Even if I don't like it, I'll do it because I know you've got a good reason."

Slightly confused, Sam raised an eyebrow. "So… you're mad at me because you trust me?"

"Partly." John glared at her again, his jaw locked tightly. It seemed like it pained him to admit as much.

And for a split second, she thought she knew what he wasn't saying.

"Oh." Sam's throat thickened, and her heart began to race. "Um... Good to have that cleared up."

Silence fell between them again, awkward and tense. With nowhere to go, Sam began to skirt her eyes back and forth, lingering only occasionally on John. He stood locked in one place, but slowly, his shoulders began to lose some of their tension and his eyes didn't look as intense.

Eventually, John sighed and he sounded resigned. "Next time you wanna be all heroic and stuff, at least give me a heads up. You kinda killed my routine back there on the bridge."

"Your routine?" Despite it all, Sam smiled. The humour was like a valve release. Familiar and cathartic, like walking through a waterfall and coming out clean on the other side.

"Yeah…you know…" John scratched his head, looking a little embarrassed.

Sam chuckled and, for a moment, everything seemed like it was back on track. Like all moments, however, it passed and evolved into another awkward silence.

"Um… I should probably get some sleep too," John said finally, shifting on his feet. "Been a long day."

"Yeah…"

Sam glanced at Hailey again, worried. She almost jumped out of her skin when John's hand suddenly covered hers.

"She'll be all right," John said quietly. His thumb caressed the ridge of her knuckles. His eyes were once more indiscernible, or that's at least what Sam told herself. What she saw in them…was one of those things they'd never been allowed to _talk_ about.

"I know," said Sam thickly, a lump forming in her throat again.

John nodded, squeezed her hand, and then let go. After saying goodnight, she watched him leave the infirmary without looking back, and her insides twisted.

* * *

  
**Next:** "One step at a time."

* * *


	21. DAY 274

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Xiaoyi's continuing to reach out for official trading partners, Sam and John visit one of theirs.

_****_

 

* * *

****TWENTY |** "One step at a time..."**

Prompt: a time to love

* * *

**DAY 274**

"You know, I've missed this. Stretching my legs, watch some boring harvest festival and eat with the locals. It's actually nice to get out of the lab. Can you believe it? Me?"

"Rodney." Smirking slightly, John gestured to the DHD McKay was currently standing next to. "Do you mind? Some of us got plans tonight."

"Oh, rub it in my face, why don't you?" grumbled McKay, his good mood transformed into his typical low-sugar level scowl. With stiff motions, he punched the buttons on the DHD. On the raised platform some metres away, the stargate came to life. Within moments, an event horizon formed and McKay stepped back from the DHD. "There. Don't let it hit you where the sun won't shine."

A few amused titters sounded around the group. John just rolled his eyes and input his code on his GDO. When he was done, he pocketed it and waved the rest of his team forward. "Alright, people. Let's get this stuff to Atlantis. Got some hungry people waiting for us."

At his cue, the ten Atlanteans in the group each picked up crates and baskets of fruits, meat and various other items given to them by the Saelin, a newly acquired ally, and stepped through the gate.

On the other side, Atlantis's gate room was filled with brilliant sunlight. A team of people stepped forward to help them with the load. John noticed their wide grins and excited faces as they chatted and relished over the new kinds of fruit they'd brought. It made him smirk faintly as he pocketed two of the unfamiliar fruits before heading over to the SOs.

"Welcome back, Colonel." Dawkins descended the grand staircase, as always neatly dressed in his base uniform. "I trust everything went okay?"

"Yeah, no problem. Milk run." Having handed over his weapons to the SOs, John turned to the other lieutenant colonel. "The Saelin were happy to see us again, especially when I told them the deal's on." He gestured to the stacks of food being transported out of the gate room. "This'll be the first of a weekly shipment."

"Excellent." Dawkins smiled. "That brings us up to eight trading partners in total. Not a bad number, right?"

"Right." _But not the official one…_ John's smile didn't quite reach his eyes. Although deceiving Dawkins was, he had to admit, an easy job, John was starting to feel a bit tired of balancing truth and lie these days. They were just piling up day by day. He was starting to get headaches.

"Miss Xiaoyi will be very pleased," Dawkins said. "She's been very concerned about our food stores. We never know if the Wraith will suddenly show up again and we will have to start yet another cat and mouse chase. She suggested we stock up preserved food just in case."

"Thinking ahead," John commented, to which Dawkins nodded. "Well, we don't want to be caught with our pants down again."

"Not when we're all that's left..." His voice taking on a more sombre tone, Dawkins stared off into the air for a moment, a shadow crossing his eyes. It seemed unfamiliar of him, which made John wonder, but Dawkins soon shook himself out of his reverie and straightened. "Anyway, there was something I wanted to run by you regarding AR-4's mission to M4R-776…"

John held back an inward sigh. Lately, Dawkins had wanted to run a lot of things by him. Not that it was a necessarily bad thing. Even though he'd been given military command of Atlantis, at least Dawkins seemed to realise when something was beyond his current experience. In John's eyes, it was one of his few redeeming qualities.

"Could we do it on the way? I need to get a shower before I head off." John gestured towards the exit.

"Of course." Following him out of the gate room, Dawkins smiled again. "You're visiting the Athosians again this weekend, aren't you?"

 _…Not really,_ John thought with a wince. _I'd rather face Teyla's ass-whopping..._

* * *

"How about this: we create a Dyson ring or a bubble of solar power panel satellites around a small star. Rig a wireless transfer satellite, fix the beam weapon to it, and put a spacegate directly in front of it. Dial it up and tear the Wraith a new one." Sitting on the edge of Sam's bed, a small stool set with food in front of her, Hailey waved her fork in the air for emphasis.

Biting her lip, Sam shook her head. "Too little time. _Daedalus_ heads out in two weeks. In three, they'll be too far away to respond immediately if the Wraith suddenly attacks, even if they push their engines. Besides, we don't have the manpower _or_ the resources. We need a different plan." Eying Hailey's barely touched plate, Sam pointed at it. "Eat. Or I tell Keller where you're hiding out."

Hailey blew a breath, rolling her eyes. With an exaggerated motion, she took another bite of her steak. It didn't stop her from talking with her mouth full. "The Wraith don't even know where we are, or Atlantis'd be blown to pieces by now." She swallowed. "I bet they're hiding for some reason. Maybe the other Wraith factions scared it off."

"Doubtful." Sam began to pace a little in front of the cabin's fireplace. "We need to be prepared for anything, especially since Rathorn's still on the loose."

"That bastard," Hailey muttered, a dark look crossing her face. She stabbed her fork into her steak and sliced it almost violently. "Fine, then we stick to our original plan. Use all the naquadria generators we can get our hands on. I'll see what I can do once I get down to the Batcave."

"Nuh-uh. Don't even think about it, Jenn. You're not working on anything until you get the medical go-ahead," Sam said, giving her a pointed stare. "Frankly, you should still be in bed recuperating. I should've sent you back to Atlantis the moment you got here…"

Hailey gave her the stink eye. "Ma'am, with all due respect… Stop. Patronising. Me." She raised her chin defiantly. "I'm _fine._ Besides, we're on a deadline and I'm wasted in that infirmary. Yes, I was shot, but I'm not _dead_. My brain's still functioning. I'm—ow, ow, ow, careful! I was eating that!" Having reached for the plate Sam pulled away, Hailey hunched over, clutching her left side in pain. The action had most likely pulled at her stitches and broken ribs.

"I rest my case," Sam said, putting the plate back on the stool in front of the younger woman. Hailey glared at her. With a resigned sigh, Sam kneeled down. "Look, I'm just worried about you, Jenn. Something like this…it takes time to heal. I know that all too well. I don't want you to push yourself too quickly. You don't need to make a point, if that's what it's all about."

"It's not," Hailey insisted, her glare softening slightly. She looked down at her hands. "You can get Ferrars to monitor me, change my bandages, report to Keller, whatever. I know he's capable of it. Just…don't send me back there." She looked up into Sam's eyes. "Please."

Eying her closely, Sam eventually gave in. "Okay. But I'm gonna have Ferrars follow you around and make sure you don't do any heavy lifting _or_ working."

"Geez, it's like you don't trust me," Hailey muttered, but she was smiling in spite of her tone. "Can I at least keep my brain from atrophying?"

"As long as it's nothing too classified," Sam said, bemused, as she got back to her feet. Ferrars might have an inkling of what they were really doing down in the Batcave, but only four people knew the exact details: Caldwell, John and the two of them. Sam might be paranoid, but she'd rather be safe than sorry. Xiaoyi still had her sources in camp. "Now, eat up, Captain. You need your proteins."

Hailey smirked. "Aye, ma'am."

* * *

"You're thinking again." John's statement brought her out of her thoughts. He was dropping soft kisses along her neck. They were in her quarters, the early morning light streaming in through the windows across the bed, warm and bright.

Sighing contently, Sam arched backwards, further spooning against him. "It's been known to happen. You should try it sometime."

His strong arms encircled her, pulling her closer as his chin came to rest upon her shoulder. "Aw, I dunno. You're the brains in this operation, Sam."

"Liar." Craning her neck, Sam gave him a pointed look, but it was ruined by her grin.

The smug look on John's face went by without verbal elaboration or explanation, but they both knew what it meant. He did far more in this 'operation' than simply provide muscle and an occasional sounding board, and there was still that Mensa invitation that John just 'happened' to forget.

Chuckling, Sam reached up to grasp John's head. "Come here."

He obliged with a grin, closing the gap between them. Sam sighed against his lips, the touch as sweet as she'd remembered. God, it'd been so long. She just wanted to—

Sam startled awake.

"Whoa! Easy, Sam." Standing behind her, slightly wary, John held up his palms as he took a step back. Slung over his shoulder was his overnight bag, his attire changed from his more casual downtime clothes to his standard BDU. He dropped his bag in the back compartment of the Jumper and turned back towards the pilot's chair. "Rough night?"

"Ough. Kinda." Pushing off the dashboard, Sam slumped back in her seat and rubbed her eyes tiredly. Her neck complained from her having fallen asleep at an awkward angle. It didn't help that the vividness of her dream had all of her nerves on edge.

John eased past her into the pilot's chair, his touch on the controls immediately waking the instruments to life. He gave her a sideward glance as the back hatch closed, then silently produced two alien-looking fruits from his pockets. "Heard Hailey went AWOL from the infirmary this morning…"

Accepting the fruit John handed her, and electrified by his brief touch, Sam groaned. She'd forgotten how he sometimes knew exactly what was going on inside her head. "Yep. Showed up at 0500. Set off the alarm with her unscheduled activation. I expected the Wraith. Or the Genii."

"Some wake-up call, huh." Eyes on the instruments, John brought the HUD online. With one hand, he brought the alien fruit to his lips and bit into it. It seemed to melt in his hand, juices spilling over his fingers. Sam watched him lick his lips with a twist of her stomach.

"Yeah…" Putting the fruit aside, Sam ran a hand over her braid, felt the tufts of hair sticking out and removed the rubber band. The blond tresses spilled loose as she shook her head. "And then she just refused to go back." She blew an annoyed breath as she began to braid her hair anew. "She's so _stubborn_."

"Guess it's true what McKay says about you two: the apple doesn't fall far." To the side, John smirked widely as he finished off the small fruit in one large bite and wiped his hands clean on his pants. Then he ran his fingers over the instruments, engaging the Jumper's pre-flight preparation sequence.

Sam glared at him. "I'm not even gonna deign that with an answer."

Chuckling, John got the go-ahead from the Jumper's interface and then fired up the engines. "You set to go?"

Sam nodded and fastened her new braid with the rubber band before settling back in her seat. The fruit was left untouched on the edge of the dashboard and while John seemed to notice, he didn't comment on it.

"All right. Time to visit our _other_ friends." As John pulled the Jumper into the air and engaged the cloak, Sam saw his smirk falter slightly and tension lines appeared on his face. She recognised the look. It'd become a familiar sight on these particular visits.

For some reason, it comforted her a little to know he didn't really want to go. Sam thought it might mean something, especially in light of things that'd been subtly implied after the Genii coup d'état. Taking pity on him as the Jumper soared over the treetops towards the stargate, she changed topics.

"So, how did it go with the Saelin?"

"Managed to get a deal," John said, his tension lines easing up somewhat. "Xiaoyi agreed to all their terms, so they're on the official watch list now. _Daedalus_ will add them to its patrol route."

"That's great." Sam smiled. Outside the windscreen, the stargate came into view with the security teams on standby. Sam transmitted a short message to the sergeant in charge and saw him look up in their general direction with a raised thumb. Coast was clear.

"Seems to get her a lot of respect from people," John continued as Sam leaned over to input the target address into the Jumper's DHD. "Even McKay's singing her praises."

"Let me guess…whenever he eats?" Sam teased, settling back in her seat again. It was no secret that McKay loved a bit of comfort food, or at least a larger variety than fish, porridge and dried fruit. Below them, the stargate began to spin into life.

"Dead on," John said, smirking. "The rest of the time, he's sort of undecided. He's starting to get a bit frustrated that he can't boss around the eggheads like he used to, and that he's stuck with working on Atlantis' shields. Practically begged me to join the mission today."

The event horizon burst outwards from the stargate and then settled into the familiar blue-shimmering surface.

"All jokes aside, though," said Sam as John positioned the Jumper. "Any boost for morale is a good thing. Can't deny that. And it's nice to get a varied diet."

John gave her a sideward questioning glance. "Do I detect an ounce of respect? From _you_?"

"Personally? Not on your life." Sam's expression darkened. "Professionally? _Maybe_ an ounce. A very tiny one. You can hardly see it."

She blew a breath as the Jumper threaded the needle. A moment later, they appeared on the other side of the wormhole, the blackness of space surrounding them. John turned the puddle jumper around.

Closing her eyes for a second, Sam sighed and ran a hand across her face. "I just… I want people to be happy again. Even if it's due to her… There's been too much—"

"Uh… Sam?" John's tense tone made her stop and look out through the windscreen.

The _Aurora-_ class warship they were scheduled to meet at this position hovered right in front of them. Spread out around it, however, were dozens of generational ships of all sizes, types and shapes. The fleet dwarfed them by comparison and, as Sam watched, some of them moved menacingly towards the spacegate they'd just exited. According to the Jumper's HUD, they were bringing their weapons systems online.

Sam met John's eyes tensely. "You didn't do anything to upset Larrin last time…right?"

* * *

John set the Jumper down in the Ancient warship's hangar bay, his eyes paying close attention to everything happening outside the windscreen. There was a flurry of activity with people transporting crates and equipment amidst the haphazardly positioned stacks of supplies. Cables and handcrafted rigs were lying everywhere.

"Seems they've had some new additions," Sam said, calling his attention to four puddle jumpers stored in the walls of the bay. "Wonder where they got those."

Seeing Larrin stride briskly towards their Jumper ahead of a Traveler entourage, John felt a nervous shiver run down his spine. "You ask her. I think I might just stay here. Keep the engine going. Might need a quick getaway."

Sam snorted. "Just stay clear of her bite and you'll be fine."

"Hope you brought a tetanus shot," John muttered, "because I've seen that look before." He reluctantly got to his feet and followed Sam to the back compartment. He watched as Sam picked up her backpack with a wary look. "Can I at least bring my gun?"

Chuckling, Sam rolled her eyes. "Just open the door."

"Don't say I didn't warn you…"

John reached out to press the door release. With a hiss of air, the hatch slowly opened and came to rest against the ground. Outside the door, Larrin stood waiting, her look stoic and intense.

"Um…Hi," Sam said tentatively, putting on her biggest smile.

Larrin looked at her and frowned. "What happened to your face? You run into a bulkhead?"

Sam tensed visibly and brushed her hand across the small bandage that covered her still-healing ricochet wound from two weeks ago. "Just a minor mishap. Accident."

Larrin only raised an eyebrow. "That sorry excuse might work with whoever you hang around these days…but I'll let it slide."

 _That_ made John cock his eyebrow at her. Letting things slide wasn't exactly Larrin's MO. Before he could say anything, however, Larrin was already waving them out of the Jumper and he followed in Sam's wake as the two women walked ahead.

"I have good news and bad news," Larrin said, cutting straight to the chase. "I managed to scrounge up the thrusters you requested and they're ready for transport." She pointed at a stack of crates when they passed it.

"And the bad news?" Sam glanced at Larrin as they exited the hangar bay into a less busy hallway, her face contorting into a frown.

Larrin eyed Sam's bandage again. "You _sure_ that doesn't have something to do with certain rumours we hear about the Genii? Doesn't look recent."

Sam's cheeks flushed.

Larrin grimaced. "Yeah, thought so." She stopped once they reached the first intersection. "There's no point denying it, Sam. Word's gone around. We know you were involved in the Genii civil war and that you've put out a bounty on former Commander Rathorn."

"Last time I checked, the Travelers weren't concerned with the dealings of the Genii, or the rest of the galaxy for that matter," John said, his brows furrowed. "Your paths never crossed."

"They do now." Larrin gave him a fierce look. "A few months back, the Genii infiltrated several of our colonies. Took off with a lot of valuable tech. Since then, we've kept a close eye on them. They're dangerous. Power-seekers always are."

John met Sam's eyes tensely. Could it be Radim's work or Rathorn's?

Unperturbed by their silent communication, Larrin turned and addressed Sam. "Look, you've kept up your end of your deal, but there are people who don't like the idea of working with Genii sympathisers. Some of the captains want to break off the deal."

Sam tensed. "And the rest?"

Larrin smiled tightly. "Divided on the issue. What happens next is up to the individual captains. Lucky for you, they've all gathered here today. Special treatment for you." She gestured to one of the people in her entourage. "Please escort Colonel Carter to the conference room."

"Hang on—" John began to say, but before he could argue further, Larrin had gripped his arm tightly and started pulling him down the hallway.

"You're with me today, Sheppard," she said. "We need your gene."

The rest of her entourage crowded around Sam, blocking her from his view. Despite his resistance, John could only watch as they started moving as one indistinguishable mass in the opposite direction.

* * *

There was something very disconcerting about the twenty-odd faces staring at her across the conference table. Most were unknowns. A few were captains who'd fought with Atlantis in the Battle of Asuras, and seemed to be the only ones who didn't give her openly hostile looks.

Sam cleared her throat. "I understand you wish to discuss our current arrangement. If you had called beforehand, I would've brought—"

"A Genii bribe?" One of the captains, a male in his forties with a black goatee, sneered.

Sam bit back her retort. That was what they wanted, obviously: to unbalance her. She recognised the tactic; it'd been heavily used by the IOA. But she wasn't going to fall for that again. She was stronger than that.

"Captain Gaelon."

The captain's sneer disappeared abruptly. Barely. Some of the other captains stirred uneasily in their seats, glancing towards the woman seated at the end of the table. Regal-looking even in her simple leathers, Treya exuded a calm, wise and no-nonsense assertiveness that garnered respect, which was probably why she was the Traveler Council's elected spokeswoman. In this particular meeting, however, she was just one voice of many and did not have any more power than the next one, at least in theory.

Once silence descended, Treya faced Sam. "Colonel Carter, I apologise for not giving you time to prepare for this meeting. Matters have arisen quite…suddenly." She paused for a moment, letting the words echo in the spacious room. "Did Captain Larrin inform you of the issue at hand?"

"Yes."

Steeling herself, Sam pushed all her doubts, insecurities and fears to the back of her head; she needed to think clearly for this. Based on Larrin's curt words, emotions were running high among the Travelers, and Sam had to counter that with her only available tool: logic. First, however, she had to get a feel of the situation; she felt like she was currently fumbling in the darkness.

"I believe you have questions about some rumours involving myself and the Genii," she stated, resting her hands on the tabletop and meeting the eyes of every captain and civilian representative around the conference room table.

"To put it mildly," muttered Gaelon.

"Do you deny their validity?" Another captain asked, a woman in her fifties with long, red curls and a jagged scar across her neck.

Neck tensing, Sam took a deep breath and plunged ahead. "No."

A chorus of mutters broke out around the table. People were shaking or nodding their heads at each other, others were whispering lowly in intense tones.

Treya's face showed no indication of her alignment. "Perhaps you could tell us, Colonel," she said, bringing the room to a hushed silence again, "what, exactly, your relationship with the Genii is, or has been."

"Strictly business."

"The rumours seem to suggest otherwise, Colonel," a middle-aged man said quietly. Sam recognised him as Darian, one of the captains from the Battle of Asuras. "You assisted in the Genii's recent civil war, did you not?"

Sam ignored the urge to touch her bandage, her annoyance with Rathorn flaring up momentarily. "Not by design, I assure you."

"How so?" the redheaded woman asked, frowning.

Sam chose her words carefully; there were things, she decided, that the Travelers had no right or need to know given that they hadn't fully committed to a long-term plan to fight the Wraith. "I walked into a trap. Word of the coup d'état hadn't reached Atlantis, so when I visited them for a pre-arranged trade meeting, their new leader, Rathorn, captured me. When my people came to extract me, the Genii civil war broke out. We were caught in the middle."

"Convenient." Off to the side, Gaelon narrowed his eyes at her. Some of his sidemen nodded in agreement. Others, Sam noticed, shot him a nasty look.

"But true." Sam met Gaelon's eyes head-on. He silenced, his expression changing into a grimace.

"So you decided to side with one of the factions fighting for control?" The redheaded woman asked, leaning forward. Her eyes grew hard. "And judging by the bounty put on this Commander Rathorn, you chose Chief Radim's?"

"I made a tactical decision based on the circumstances," Sam said lowly, shifting her gaze to look at each of the captains around the table. She left out the bit where Rathorn intended to hand her off to the Wraith for some nefarious purpose. She wasn't here to play the victim.

"Spoken like a true commander." Gaelon looked for a moment like he was about to applaud her. His expression, however, was anything but in awe. "And your decision had nothing to do with your past dealings with the Genii?"

"Any particular dealings you had in mind?" Sam narrowed her eyes in challenge, already suspecting what was to come.

Gaelon's lips thinned, but it was the redheaded woman who answered. "Colonel, were you aware of the Genii's intention to enter our colonies and steal valuable technology from us three months ago?"

"No," Sam said immediately. "If I had, I would've done whatever I could to stop it."

"Those are pretty words, Colonel," Gaelon said, his expression turning dark. "And easy to say."

Sam's teeth clenched at the familiar vibe of insinuating attitude and she closed her eyes for a moment. Opening them, she stared directly at Gaelon. "If there's something you'd like to say, Captain, just say it. It'll save us all a lot of time." She levelled her eyes around at the rest of the gathered Travelers. "That goes for all of you."

Some of the captains squirmed uncomfortably in their seats, looking guilty. Others straightened their shoulders or clenched their jaws indignantly in an obvious attempt to hold something back.

Treya alone seemed unaffected, but her deep, keen eyes never strayed from Sam.

* * *

In the Ancient warship's control room, the general chatter from earlier had toned down to a hushed silence. One of the technicians at a nearby console stared at the display in front of him. "The readings check out, Captain. The Asgard shields are at 100 %."

"Bring it up on the display, Sheppard." Standing a few steps away from the control chair, Larrin jerked her head towards the major HUD display at the front of the room. Holding back a sigh, John complied and an image of a three-dimensional warship popped up inside a translucent bubble on the display. The surface of the bubble rippled with steady power surges. "Well, would you look at that…?"

"See? Told you. Can I go now?" John knew he sounded petulant, but he didn't care. He shifted his legs restlessly in the control chair. They'd been at it for over an hour already. He didn't like sitting in chairs so close to Larrin; he half-expected chains to suddenly appear and tie him down.

"Not yet." Larrin grinned, stood up straight and moved over to a different console, toggling one of the buttons. " _Maxxon,_ this is the _Vestige_. Fire a volley at us. Use the heavy guns."

"You gotta be kidding me…" John groaned when he caught on to Larrin's game. "Look, you gotta work on that—whoa!"

The impulses from the sensors combined with the warship's systems flashed through his mind. In slow motion, he sensed the discharge of combined railgun and energy weapons from a nearby Traveler ship and immediately grabbed hold of the shields. The warship barely rocked with the impact, but to John's mind it felt like an attack on his entire nervous system. Golden stars exploded behind his eyelids.

Coming back to reality, John opened his eyes and glared at Larrin. "You satisfied?"

Larrin looked away from the HUD display and grinned at him. "Very. You got more of these lying around? Got a whole fleet interested."

John grimaced as he thought of Earth. "You'll have to make do with the one you got."

"Shame," Larrin said, approaching him. John took it as a cue for him to finally ease the control chair back into a powered-down state. "Fortunately, we've got all these brilliant engineers. They'll think of something."

"Yeah? Good luck with that," John muttered. Even though they had a couple of colonies now, the Travelers still had limited supply capabilities. Apparently, with the option to stay on the ground came the relaxation of the population control issue, and baby booms in the last year or so had left them with too many mouths to feed.

John jumped out of the control chair and walked a couple of steps until he felt fully connected to this world again. Interfacing with a control chair always made him feel slightly out-of-balance for a couple of moments, as if stepping out of a different reality altogether. He gestured towards the door. "If there's nothing else…?"

"I've never seen you so eager to leave before, Sheppard." Larrin grinned. She sauntered towards him, leaning into his personal space while lowering her voice suggestively. "Something change recently?"

John tensed and instinctively took a step back. Seeing Larrin's grin only widen, irritation bubbled up inside him and he reclaimed the step he'd taken. "Look, it's one thing to lock _me_ up every time something bad happens to you guys, but ambush Sam like that after everything she's done for you? _Not_ cool. So yeah, I'd like to leave now."

He turned on the spot and stalked towards the bridge's exit, not waiting around for her permission. He didn't get far, though. Two guards positioned outside the door stopped him with a swift aim of their particle magnum guns.

John groaned loudly and swung back to face Larrin. " _Really?_ "

Larrin gestured for the guards to stand down, her smile gone. "I'm not done with you yet."

* * *

Sam's jaw was hurting. She forced herself to unclench it and breathe deeply, but she wasn't sure it was working. Not for the first time, she cursed General O'Neill. He just _had_ to pick her, didn't he?

"Running out of excuses, Colonel?" Gaelon's forehead was furrowed, his eyes glinting dangerously. Sam thought she could see the beginning signs of sweat under his armpits. A vein on his neck had started to pulse more rapidly in the last hour or so, his face reddening with each failure to get her to admit guilt.

"I'm going to say this for the last time: I _didn't_ have anything to do with the Genii thefts!" Sam gritted her teeth, her hands clenched on top of the table. "Do I do business with them? Yes. Did I know about their plans? No. Would I have stopped them if I did? _Yes_!"

Fire threatening to burst out of her, Sam stared at all of the captains around the table, her pulse beginning to race. "Look, I get it. You got screwed over and you're pissed. You want to assign blame and you go for the one you consider the most likely suspect. Given your social circles, I guess I'm not surprised _I_ was your first choice."

The captains skirted glances at each other, obviously seeking affirmation in their various allies. Her words, it seemed, had hit home.

Sam pushed on, her voice rising in intensity. "Only, you're barking up the wrong tree! Atlantis had nothing to do with it." She rose to her feet, leaning her fists on the tabletop. Some of the captains suddenly looked uneasy. "I'm not a big fan of the Genii. I'll be the first to tell you that some of them cannot be trusted by a long shot. God knows they've tried to screw us over in the past, _but that's changed._ You know why? Because they _need_ us."

Gaelon scoffed. "Yes, indeed. How else did they manage to get inside our—"

"God! How can you be so damn short-sighted?" Sam snapped, half-tempted to bang her fist into the table for emphasis. John had to be rubbing off on her. "You _know_ what's happening in this galaxy right now. You _know_ about the Wraith civil war, about the Wraith superhive that'd rather completely _destroy_ a human settlement than let one of their rivals get to it. You've lost ships and people because of that. You agreed to _help_ us in return for technology that'd better protect your ships. _You_ need us as much as _we_ need you!"

"Hardly—" Gaelon began, but he was cut off.

"Colonel Carter has a fair point," Darian said. His sidemen nodded in agreement. "We are not alone in this galaxy. This new threat is unlike any we've encountered before, hence our initial exchange agreement with Atlantis. Our technology cannot measure up to it."

"Something easily solved by leaving Pegasus," a different captain spoke up. Sam recognised her as Katana Labrea, one of the Travelers Atlantis had worked with in the past. "We're Travelers, not settlers. We have the ships. We can just leave."

"And go where?" the redheaded woman asked pointedly, clearly annoyed. "We have no guarantee there is a galaxy out there without a threat like the Wraith. None of our scout ships have returned and it has been four years. If we leave, we could just be heading to something worse."

 _Like in the Milky Way galaxy,_ Sam thought instinctually.

"Of course we're not leaving! The thought is ridiculous!" Gaelon burst out, jerking forwards in his chair. "The Wraith have always been our enemy and we have always evaded them, but not anymore. We need to take the fight to them, even if it means committing all our forces and resources to it. But we don't need _her_ or her so-called 'business allies'! We've survived so far on our own. We can continue doing so."

"Have you forgotten about the Asurans already?" Darian countered. "About how Atlantis and even _the Wraith_ helped us stop them from finding more of our colonies? Atlantis has helped us in the past. They're helping us _now_. What does it matter who they otherwise have dealings with? We don't even know _which_ Genii faction is behind the thefts – it could be this Rathorn character Colonel Carter told us about earlier. A civil war doesn't just _happen._ It's planned. Rathorn had most likely been in business for months. Perhaps our—"

"You're just guessing!" the redheaded woman said, shaking her head.

"What does it matter _which_ Genii did it?" Katana interjected before the other woman could continue. "What's done is done. We should take advantage of the apparent lull in the Wraith civil war and leave. There won't be another chance like this."

"Out of the question—"

"We _should_ be discussing Atlantis's deal instead! Who are they to—"

"Don't change the subject—"

"We should never—"

" _She's_ the one who—"

And just like that, everything derailed.

* * *

"This is getting old."

In the dimmed room, Sheppard glared at her in the sole stream of light from overhead. His fists were clenched, Larrin noticed, and he kept flexing his muscles against the restraints to test their flexibility. It only made her grin.

"Keeps you still." She inched around the chair, trailing her fingers up his arms and across the exposed skin of his neck. Leaning down, she breathed hot air across his ear. "You're always on the move, Sheppard. Why's that?"

Jerking his head away, Sheppard struggled against the restraints, his tone gruff. "What'd you want, Larrin? Personal boy-toy? Sorry, I ain't applying."

While she didn't get his strange idioms, Larrin understood his underlying subtext. She chuckled as she continued around the chair until she faced him fully. "You're always so tense. Don't you people ever release your valves?"

Sheppard's lips thinned.

"Ooh, touchy subject." Larrin crouched down in front of the chair, resting her outstretched palms on Sheppard's thighs, her thumbs starting to caress the insides. "Prefer a different ship, do you?"

"Larrin…" The name was gritted out from a clenched jaw. Sheppard's eyes glinted as he once more struggled against the restraints, his whole body starting to tremble beneath her touch. "I swear to God… Get. Me. Out. Of. This. Fucking. Chair."

Larrin rolled her eyes and got back up to her feet. "You used to be fun."

She walked over to a table pushed up against the wall and picked up a small needle-like device. Turning back, she saw Sheppard eye her darkly. He'd stilled completely.

"What's your game, Larrin?"

She held up the device for him to see, her voice turning hard. "Insurance."

* * *

Tense, Sam paced in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows in the warship's VIP suite. Outside, the Traveler fleet had shifted into almost indiscernible groups; most likely as a result of the heated debate Sam had been witness to an hour earlier.

She hadn't known it'd been this bad. There'd always been murmurs of dissent since some of the Travelers decided to live on planets instead of ships, but this felt like they were on the verge of a schism. Was she watching another people break apart – in the middle of a violent and dangerous galaxy warzone?

The doors _whooshed_ open. Sam turned just in time to see John stumble inside, clothes slightly disarrayed, hair mussed up and a bruise forming on his left cheek. She caught a brief glimpse of a red-faced Larrin before the doors closed again and felt like a stone had dropped into the bottom of her stomach.

"John?" Her voice sounded strangled.

John touched his jaw and winced as he hit the bruise. " _Goddamnit_." Spotting her, he gave her a glare. "I'm _never_ going back here, so you might as well throw me in the brig for insubordination when we get back to Atlantis."

Sam let out a half-hearted chuckle. "Not your direct CO anymore, remember? Could always get the Tiranians to build one, though." Stomach churning uncomfortably, Sam hesitated before asking, "What happened?"

Feeling the outside of a metal water jug on the nearby dining table, John picked it up and held it against his bruise with a grimace. "Larrin doesn't know how to ask nicely. Wanted a dozen samples of my blood. Called it insurance."

Sam gave him a look of confusion. As far as she knew, the only thing special about John's blood was the presence of his naturally occurring ATA gene, but the Travelers had received samples of the gene therapy months ago as part of their deal with her. She raised an eyebrow, opting for breaking the tension between them. "Think they want to clone you?"

John snorted, then winced as the action stretched the bruised skin of his cheek. He slumped down onto the couch facing the wall-sized window. "Dunno. The only explanation I got was this." He gestured to the bruise, which seemed almost hand-shaped. "Though, it might've been for calling her names."

Sam smiled, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. There was something off about him; something he wasn't telling her, and her mind immediately assumed the worst. Crossing her arms tightly, she turned back to the window and took a couple of deep breaths. "When this is over, I'm retiring."

"Meeting went that well, huh?" John's tone was sardonic. "Lemme guess, inbred politicians and gun-crazed maniacs who didn't want anything to do with the Wraith?"

Clear that he was still trying to lighten the mood, Sam pushed down those definite personal feelings she was experiencing at the moment and went to sit on the other end of the couch. "Something like it. The Travelers are breaking apart. Turns out the Genii thefts and our involvement with the Genii civil war have become their fuel for fire." She sighed and ran a hand over her eyes, rubbing them. "I don't know how to salvage this."

"It's _their_ problem," John said, his tone annoyed. " _You_ don't have to fix anything."

Sam glared at him. "We need this ship, their fleet, John. If we wanna protect this galaxy from suffering the same atrocities as back home…" She paused, half-surprised her throat didn't choke up at the reference to the Milky Way. John met her eyes steadily, his jaw clenched slightly. "If there's a schism, our deal's off. Count on it. What then? The Ascalon is still a month away from completion, _Daedalus_ needs to head out on patrol to protect our allies and find that missing superhive, and all Atlantis has are improved shields and a cloak that the superhive can penetrate in seconds." She stared outside at the slowly shifting Traveler fleet. The distances were getting more defined. "We'll all be as dead as Earth."

The silence that followed was tense. Sam sat ramrod straight and alert, conscious of every breath and movement John made. How it'd come to this – another unspoken, edgy fight – she didn't know. It felt like that time in her office; him on one side, her on another. Two superpowers faced off in yet another Cold War.

"You'll think of something." The softness in John's voice startled her. She looked at him. He sat as tense as her, but his eyes were less hard than she'd expected.

Recognising the quiet support for what it was, Sam relaxed a fraction and sank slowly back in the cushions. She let out a deep breath and gave him a small smile. "Thank you, John."

He nodded in acknowledgment, but didn't say anything else.

Eventually, Sam broke the silence. "Need that tetanus shot?"

It elicited another snort from John.

* * *

Opening her eyes, Larrin let the control chair power down and sat up. A headache was threatening to split her head in two, and she'd only been in it for less than ten minutes.

"Larrin?" Councillor Treya stood off to one side of the chair, her eyes worried. She rested a hand on Larrin's, the contact comforting until Larrin realised they weren't alone in the room. Many of the technicians looked away hurriedly when she levelled her eyes at them.

"I'm fine." Larrin waved the hand away and slumped forward with elbows on her knees. The images and voices of the two Atlanteans remained at the front of her mind, jumbled together with the surge of headaches. It took a moment to sort it all out as she came down from the overwhelming high of being connected to the control chair.

"So?" Treya's voice was expectant yet hesitant. There'd been doubts about this approach, but it seemed to be the only chance to learn what the Atlanteans were thinking.

Larrin sighed. She had a feeling some of those words and images would stick with her for a long time. Even from a different point of view, she could sense their underlying emotion and the pain associated with them. She'd seen far more than she'd liked. No wonder Sheppard had been tight-lipped earlier.

Staring up at her mother, Larrin's tone was grim. "It's bad."

* * *

"Before Larrin dragged me off to be exsanguinated, she had me test the Asgard shields." John swallowed the bite he'd been chewing and almost immediately put a new bite into his mouth while talking out of one side of his mouth. Used to this kind of behaviour, Sam only rolled her eyes and ate her own food at a more leisurely pace. "The installation is complete and functional, and they're about halfway through the other necessary upgrades to withstand the Wraith. Kept bugging me about access to more shield generators, though. Also dropped a not so subtle hint that she wouldn't mind one of the Asgard plasma beam weapons."

"Blueprints for railguns weren't enough?" Sam snorted, picking up her glass of water and swirling the contents around with a roll of her hand. "The Genii, the Travelers… They all want a piece of the pie, but when we suggest—"

The rest of her sentence was lost in the sound of doors that _whooshed_ open and the immediate entry of Larrin and Councillor Treya. Both women looked solemn, although Larrin with more fire in her eyes than the Councillor.

"Councillor?" Putting down her glass, Sam turned in her chair with a look of confusion. "Has something happened?"

"Is it true that your homeworld is gone?" Treya asked without any preamble.

Both Sam and John froze solid. Underneath her skin, Sam felt her heart suddenly thump like a galloping horse. Her breath was caught in her throat as she quickly sped through her options. Before she could open her mouth, however, John spoke in a harsh tone.

"Where did you hear that?"

Neither of the Traveler women answered him. Instead, Treya repeated, "Is it true, Colonel Carter?"

Although initially unsettled, Sam became grounded by John's accusation. Where _had_ they heard that? It was by far their best-kept secret. Even the IOA had been clear that there'd be no indication to their allies that there was no big and vicious back-up waiting just a call away. In their weakened state, Atlantis needed the unspoken threat of a powerful Earth. Appearances were their ally, which was also why Sam didn't broadcast the fact that she wasn't the _de facto_ leader of Atlantis anymore. So what had they done? Did they have a mole in Atlantis?

"I believe my XO asked you a question." Sam's voice was equal to John's. She levelled her eyes at Treya, forcing as much power into her expression as possible.

The Councillor didn't back down. For a long while, both gauged the other, tested each other's grit, while the tension in the room grew exponentially. Sam's heart began to calm underneath that gaze as she realised she could hold it without flinching. Her shoulders straightened, her chin lifted just a fraction, and her eyes hardened.

Finally, Treya blinked. "This room has ears."

"You _eavesdropped_ on us?" John's cutlery dropped onto the plate with a clatter. "That how you treat—"

" _Is it true_?" Larrin interjected, crossing her arms tightly and looking from John to Sam. "Your homeworld is lost?"

Sam surveyed the two Traveler women: the tension lines around Treya's eyes, the determined yet slightly worried lilt to Larrin's lips, and the overall edgy energy pulsating off their entire being. She frowned. "Why do you want to know?"

Larrin shifted on her feet while Treya remained still. They gave each other a brief look that didn't reveal anything to Sam, after which the elder woman turned fully towards her. "We are worried, Colonel Carter. During the past year, the galaxy has changed faster than we can keep up with it. Our last scout report stated that the Wraith superhive is either decimating its enemies or allying themselves with them. Some deny it, but many of our people are scared. This is the closest we've been to extinction in generations. A unified Wraith force hasn't been seen since the Ancestors inhabited Atlantis."

"Some are saying it's an omen." Scoffing darkly, Larrin started to pace back and forth, her frustration shining through her tone of voice and expression. Treya eyed her with a slight look of worry. "We spend more energy on keeping our people together for just one more day than actually _doing_ something about this whole mess."

"What they need is hope and a target," the Councillor said, turning back to Sam. "So far, we have managed to stay one step ahead of the Wraith by consolidating our forces and relocating civilians to our central colony, as you suggested several months ago." She paused, sighing and gesturing to the split fleet outside the wall-sized window. "The consequence, however, is _this_. Our people are breaking apart."

Outside the window, the distance between the different groups of ships was obvious now. It almost felt like a Mexican standoff. Sam could see that it pained Treya to admit the truth. She sympathised. After all, it'd happened on Atlantis too, only the line was less clear these days since Sam had taken her Wraith-fighting agenda underground.

"You were hoping we could offer sanctuary," Sam stated quietly.

She looked at the two Traveler women. Larrin had stopped completely and Treya had grown as still as a rock, but the answer was clear in their expressions. At the moment, the Travelers were too divided to function and thus vulnerable to attack. If they could move their base of operations to the Milky Way, however, they might be able to fulfil everyone's wishes. Those who wished to fight or flight could do so, and those who wished to live on ships or planets could do so as well. It seemed the ideal solution.

Sam sighed deeply and glanced at John. He sat impossibly still, his dark eyes surveying the Travelers. Finally, he met her eyes.

_What should I do, John? Is it time? Can we trust them?_

_…Yes._

The answer didn't come immediately or easily. There was an edge in John's expression, a mix of reluctance and resignation that connected with something deep inside her. Despite his reservations and his less-than-great experiences with the Travelers, John felt for them. He cared about them. He wanted to salvage this too so that they could all survive, simply out of the goodness of his heart. It made Sam smile and want to tear up. Deep down, he was a good guy. Capable of terrible things, yes, but so was she. They were one and the same, and that thought comforted her.

"Earth was attacked by an unknown alien force nine months ago." Sam broke away her gaze from John's and turned to the two Traveler women. "We've been unable to contact them ever since."

"It is presumed that the rest of the galaxy has suffered the same fate," John added, his voice softer than it'd been earlier. "So we're stuck here, same as you."

For a moment, there was no response. Then, Larrin cursed loudly. " _Not_ what I wanted to hear right now." She looked at Treya, running a frustrated hand through her curly hair. "So, what's next?"

Treya eyed Sam and John pensively, not as visibly shook as Larrin. "We proceed as planned."

* * *

The stoic faces of the Traveler captains hadn't changed in the hours between the meetings. Now, however, some of them didn't only view her in a hostile manner, but also several of their own.

 _'Beneath the surface of what you witnessed earlier today, Colonel Carter, the Travelers_ are _grateful for the things you have provided for us,'_ Treya had told her earlier in the VIP suite. _'The City of Atlantis has been a valuable ally in the past. She should be so again.'_

"I didn't come here today to talk about the Genii; I came to honour our deal," Sam began, sitting straight in her seat, her chin raised. "Colonel Sheppard has informed me that many of your ships have now successfully installed new railguns from our designs, and that this ship's new shields are functioning perfectly. Against the standard Wraith ships, it is now easily the most powerful ship in your fleet. How it fares against the superhive, however, remains to be seen."

Sam paused for a moment. "When the superhive was barely finished, it almost decimated the city of Atlantis _and_ our battle cruiser. We escaped that encounter by sheer luck and good timing. We then did as you do now – evaded them – and it worked. We survived and are still alive today." She sent a round of pointed looks at the captains she'd identified as leaders of the various factions. "But that stopped when the superhive eradicated the first human settlements."

"It took me a while to acknowledge that the rules of the game had changed," Sam continued. Behind her, she thought she could hear John shift on his feet. He would know. It'd killed the thing between them that they couldn't openly acknowledge. Sam pushed that painful memory down to the deepest recesses of her mind. "At least one Wraith faction no longer cares about the sustainable development of humans. It'd rather decimate an entire settlement than risk any of its rivals coming there to cull. From a military perspective, it tells me this Wraith faction has some higher agenda than simple civil war; that is why they can afford to do this. Whatever that might be" – Sam had a suspicion, however, given the Wraith's previous interest in Earth – "this change affects all of us."

"It is why leaving this galaxy might be our only option," Katana said quietly.

"Or at least relocating back onto our ships again," the redheaded woman said with no trace of spite or annoyance. Just a statement. Perhaps the past couple of hours had tempered them, or so Sam hoped.

While some of the other captains seemed eager to respond, one look from Treya seemed to quell them immediately. Apparently, she had no wish for another debate as the one earlier. It particularly seemed to affect Gaelon, who didn't look at Sam or anyone else. He just stared at the opposite wall, his chin raised high.

Sam addressed the two female captains. "Both are of course your prerogative, but I'd like to take this opportunity to urge you to reconsider. It is true that currently, the civil war is keeping the Wraith busy and that it has whittled the Wraith armada down to less than half its original number of Hive ships. It is also true that we have no guaranteed defenses or offensive weapons that'll help us survive the Wraith superhive and its allies when they come." Many of the captains looked questioningly at her. "Yes, I use _when_ intentionally," Sam clarified. "Per today, the Wraith superhive is too powerful for any one of us alone, including the other Wraith factions. Once those factions realize that, they'll join the superhive's fleet. Many have already begun. When they come at us united…we won't stand a chance."

"A divided Wraith race have always been our ally," Darian agreed. "They fought each other more than they fought us."

Sam nodded. "It's been a loophole we've taken advantage of so far. If they band together like they did against the Ancients ten thousand years ago, however, we'll lose Pegasus."

A solemn atmosphere filled the silence. People skirted their eyes at each other, perhaps beginning to realize the severity of what was going on, although Sam knew from Treya that they'd probably known all along. They'd just sought out different solutions to the problem and then accused everyone else of ignoring the best possible course of action.

"It is my belief, though, that if we work together, we can beat them. We can kick them back to wherever the hell they came from."

"And how do you propose that?" One of Gaelon's sidemen asked.

"We have a plan in motion," Sam said frankly, recalling Treya's words of the Travelers needing hope and a common target. "For now, it's been about creating defences that can withstand a prolonged attack from the superhive, but if they work…we'll be willing to share."

"In return for what?" The redheaded woman asked, the snide returning briefly to her face.

"A mutually beneficial alliance." Sam leaned forward in her seat, knitting her fingers together on the tabletop. "We've already started to share some things, but there is a whole lot of other possibilities that we can look at. Technological exchange, scientific and military assistance, plain resources…"

"And where does the Genii fit into all of this?" Gaelon's question was sudden, but his voice was low, almost quiet, as if contemplative. He still didn't meet her eyes and it felt like it was done out of spite.

"As I mentioned earlier, the Genii – those led by Chief Radim – are our ally in some aspects. We have each helped the other with vital projects."

"Such as?" asked the redheaded woman.

Sam sought out Treya's eyes for confirmation. Unnoticed by the captains, who were too busy looking at Sam, the councillor gave an almost imperceptible nod.

"Chief Radim asked for assistance in creating a nuclear power plant that wouldn't threaten the population's health and at the same time provide a stable power source." Sam paused, lowering her voice slightly. "In return, they provided us with necessary resources for a new weapons project designed specifically to take down the Wraith superhive."

Astonished silence followed, soon broken by a smattering of whispers.

"You are in possession of such a thing?" Darian finally asked, bringing the whispers to a halt.

"It is not finished, nor tested, but if it performs as it is intended to…yes." Sam shifted in her seat, giving everyone around the table a second glance. It was clear that many of them were intrigued. "It'll be able to protect a colony against any Wraith ships _and_ it is one of the many things you will have access to if you decide to formally join forces with us against the Wraith."

"Why do you even _care_?" Gaelon bit out, turning to glare at her. "You don't belong in this galaxy, Colonel. If you hadn't come, the Wraith would still be in hibernation. We'd have another generation or so to prepare for their return. Instead, our plans were cut short and we've lost thousands of people since. Whole ships and colonies gone. But maybe this offer of yours is a lie. All you've been concerned about is that precious city. You practically said it yourself – you've developed these defences to protect Atlantis, haven't you? Why not take the city and go back to where you come from? Are you planning to replace the Wraith instead? Lure us in and then stab us in the back when the Wraith are gone?"

Gaelon's words faced only silence. None of the Travelers questioned him. They all just skirted their eyes at her expectantly, most likely wondering about the same things themselves.

_This is it. I just hope it works._

Sam heard John shift behind her as if reminding her of his presence, of his support. A warm feeling rushed through her and she straightened in her seat, facing the Traveler captains with every bit of confidence she could scrounge up.

"Our homeworld was attacked."

* * *

 _She's changed._ The thought kept running through John's mind as he watched Sam tell the whole story of Earth's demise. She never faltered, never choked up, and never released her hold on her audience. Just like the colonel from the SGC legends. And yet…there was something about her that was intrinsically… _just Sam._

It brought a soft smile to John's lips.

"It is estimated that we lost more than six billion people that night," Sam was saying. Stunned expressions showed on many of the captains' faces. It heartened John. Perhaps they'd pull this off after all. "And we suspect the rest of the galaxy isn't faring any better if the stargates were shut down. Worst case scenario, that brings the total number of deaths in our home galaxy up to the twelve-digit number."

"How can you be sure if you've had no contact with anyone?" asked one of the captains, her voice hushed and solemn.

"We cannot," Sam said without hesitance. "Not one hundred per cent. However, we can reconfigure which stargate addresses to contact and so far we've been unable to connect with any of the Milky Way gates. Given the technologically advanced races we've left behind, that shouldn't be possible unless the network is still down."

"Which means these aliens are most likely still present," another captain finished. He looked disturbed by the news. He looked at Katana, who seemed dejected. "It would seem our best option is to stay here. At least we know who and where our enemy is: the Wraith."

Some of the other captains seemed about to respond, but the councillor at the end of the table raised her hand in a gesture of silence. As she'd told them earlier, this meeting was all about Sam presenting their options. They'd have to settle their internal business elsewhere.

Sam continued. "Even if there aren't that many of us left, we can still give the Wraith a real run for their money. We've held them off so far, we crippled the superhive for a time and we can do it again." Sam stared at all of them, her shoulders squared, her expression firm and filled with confidence. John smiled again. "Pegasus is our home now. On Earth, we fought for what's ours with whatever means necessary. If that means we now have to ally ourselves with the Genii, who in turn _owe_ us for our assistance in returning Chief Radim to power, then so be it." She paused for effect and John had a feeling of what was coming next. She'd practiced a bit with him earlier. "We have a saying on Earth that I believe some of you have heard from me once before: The enemy of my enemy is my friend." The captains that'd helped them in the Battle of Asuras offered a variety of nods and smiles. Sam raised her chin. "If you can work with _the Wraith_ to take out the Asurans once and for all, then the Genii under Chief Radim should be no different. The choice is up to you, however. You can either join us and reap the benefits we offer or stay on the sidelines."

She left it at that and rose to her feet without asking permission. Giving one final, "Thank you for your time," she turned and left the room. John followed her without question.

* * *

Once they turned a corner down towards the hangar bay and faced an empty corridor, Sam began to slow down, releasing the breath of air she'd held back. "Holy Hannah… My hands won't stop shaking."

John chuckled and Sam joined him, running a shaky hand across her brow. She met his eyes hesitantly, a bit embarrassed, and saw approval written all over his face.

"You were great." The baritone-voiced praise sent shivers down her spine. Sam wrung her hands, hoping the shaking would stop soon. She startled when she felt his large, warm hands reach out and cover hers between them. Electric jolts exploded everywhere and she half-began to withdraw her hands, but John held them firmly. His expression became more serious. "I mean it."

Sam opened and closed her mouth several times, her throat clenched. Finally, she managed a strangled "Thank you". John smiled, his touch hot and comforting, but also setting all her frayed nerves on end.

She made to turn her hands over so she could squeeze back, but the sudden _hiss_ of a nearby door opening caused them to break apart like teenagers caught red-handed.

"Sam." It was Larrin. She exited the door and paused when she saw them, a frown on her face. It soon disappeared, replaced briefly by an amused smirk before ending on a more serious expression. "Councillor Treya asked me to convey a message. If you have the time, she'd like for you to stay overnight and talk to the captains individually tomorrow before their final gathering. Might help your case and ours."

Sam met John's eyes, saw him raise an eyebrow – _do we really have a choice? –_ then she gave Larrin a curt smile. "Sure."

"I'll report it back to base," John said immediately. On her nod, he left for the hangar bay, looking almost as if he couldn't wait to get out – which was probably true.

Larrin gestured back to where she'd come. "I've got a room here on the _Vestige_ that you can use _._ Real nice and comfortable."

Sam smiled. "Thank you."

* * *

Standing in the room Larrin had assigned not only her, but _them_ , Sam groaned. "I'm going to kill her."

"Get in line." Edging past her with his overnight bag, John dropped it unceremoniously in a corner. He then glanced around the tiny room and eyed the single bed with a wince. "Ooo-kay, I'm gonna take the floor."

"Feel free." Sam entered the room fully, the door _whooshing_ close behind her, and walked over to the bed. She sank down at the edge and sighed. "Been a long time since I camped without my toothbrush. You probably shouldn't talk to me tomorrow until I've had a strong cup of coffee, or whatever they pass for it anyway."

In the process of rifling through his overnight bag, John snorted. "Don't really need reminding." Sam tensed. As if realising belatedly that he'd made an intimate reference, John looked at her and winced. "Sorry."

"No, it's… It's okay." Sam gave him a shaky smile, memories of mornings back then running through her mind. "What's done is done, right? Can't deny it."

"Right." John refocused his attention on the contents of his bag. Seconds later, he produced a black T-shirt and threw it onto the bed beside her, not meeting her eyes. "It's clean. If you'd like something else to sleep in."

Sam picked it up, a soft smile crossing her lips. Despite the obvious awkwardness and painful reminders, she was touched by his gesture. "Thank you."

"Yeah, yeah." John waved it off dismissively as he fluffed up his overnight bag and used it as a pillow. He covered himself with his leather jacket and stretched out with his long legs on the metal floor.

Sam stared at him trying to find a good position, her emotions raging with her logic. Lying on the hard floor would be hard on his back in the morning, but the alternative…was a whole other cookie entirely, one she wouldn't – couldn't – touch even with a five-foot pole.

Dejected and angry with herself for all those things she'd done to him, Sam quickly changed clothes and crawled underneath the blanket. The T-shirt smelled of him. Inhaling that scent, she clutched it close as the lights dimmed and struggled to hold back her tears.

* * *

**DAY 275**

One by one or in small groups of three and four, the Traveler captains passed the puddle jumper's windscreen to their respective transports. A range of emotions was splayed across their faces: anger, relief, sadness, stoniness, worry and other less discernible ones.

"Folsom Prison Blues" blaring in his headphones, John watched them warily from inside the Jumper, wondering about the verdict, if indeed there had been one. Neither of them looked particularly pleased when they glanced at each other. Some of them even sent him nasty looks when they noticed him, so whatever note their final meeting had ended on, it was clear that some things had yet to become water under the bridge.

He checked his watch. Sam should probably be done by now too. He had yet to see her, though. Could be she was talking to the councillor again. Judging by the expressions on the captains' faces, they undoubtedly had something or other to discuss further.

John had passed the last few hours by priming the Jumper's system, fiddling with the controls and trying to see if there were any commands and systems he had yet to discover. There weren't any. His mind made it practically impossible to ignore anything once connected. So he'd moved on to listening to _Johnny Cash With His Hot and Blue Guitar_ on his mp3 player, now on its third repeat.

A groan escaped his lips as the lyrics reached its chorus and the memories of last night filtered through his mind once more. No matter how much he tried to suppress them, they kept coming back.

_Brief glimpses of long naked legs before he was able to turn his back to the sight of her changing clothes; the sound of restless movement and the almost imperceptible sniffles; the stars in the skylight above the bed she slept in; the eternity it took for her to fall asleep and for him to finally relax a notch; the regret and frustrations that made him shift position again and—_

_Bang!_

John jumped in his seat. Larrin leaned up against the windscreen, a wide grin on her face. Slowly, she removed her hands, leaving a slight misty mark on the glass. She gestured to the back of the Jumper and John pulled off his headphones, groaning. Getting to his feet, he crossed into the back compartment and hit the hatch release control.

"What?" he asked through gritted teeth as the hatch hit the floor.

Larrin strode right into the back compartment. Standing within a foot of him, she inspected the inside, her wild hair brushing across his chest when she jerked her head back and forth. "A bit cramped here. I think you'll have to make a return trip."

John frowned. " _What_?"

"Forgotten about the thrusters already?" Larrin shot him a teasing look and then stepped even closer to him. "I'll admit, I'm quite a—"

"Larrin, _please_ ," John said, leaning back against the wall and counting to ten. "No games. I'm not in the mood. Why're we getting the thrusters?"

"Still haven't got your valve release, huh? Even after last night? I thought that was why you were walking funny today." She stepped close enough to exhale her hot breath all over the exposed skin of his neck, her eyes staring up at him from underneath lush eyelashes. "Maybe you need someone else?"

John stared back steadily, not making any move, but wary about what she might do next. His body was tingling all over, and not exactly the good kind.

For a moment, Larrin leaned forward, head angled, and John instinctively pressed further up against the wall. Larrin stopped. There was a flash of something in her eyes, and then she blew an annoyed breath and took two steps away. John felt like a tonne of bricks had lifted from his chest.

"It's the Council's order." Larrin stood faced away from him in the doorway between the two compartments. "A deal's a deal. You've provided us with an edge we didn't have before, and we're returning the favour." She turned, her face stoic now, and added, "Sam explained what the thrusters were for. If the Ascelon or whatever you call it turns that superhive into space dust…it'll be worth it."

John eyed her warily. "Everyone agrees on that?"

"No. _Our_ situation is…still unresolved." Larrin's lips thinned. "Katana intends to leave, no matter what. Her crew will follow her."

"I'm sorry." From what experiences he had with the Travelers, John knew the two women were close.

"It's their choice." Larrin waved her hand, but she didn't meet his eyes. She strode out of the puddle jumper and hollered to someone outside John's view. Turning back to him, she gave a tight smile. "I'm not going down without a fight, though, so you just give me a call, Sheppard. The _Vestige_ is on your side."

Not sure what to say exactly, John just shifted on his feet. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw people start piling past the Jumper's windscreen with heavy containers between them. He stepped out of the Jumper as they rounded the side, and then watched as Larrin instructed her crew to stack the containers inside the back compartment.

John glanced at his watch again. The action didn't go unnoticed.

"She's fine." The ghost of a smile crossed Larrin's lips, but there was also something dejected in her eyes. "No one's tied her up. Don't think they'd dare to if what the rumours about the Genii civil war were true. Did she actually blow up their main power source?"

John's lips twitched briefly. The memory of finding Sam on that underground bridge, all bloodied and wild, but still fighting with her last bit of strength – and winning – swam to the front of his mind. In that brief moment, despite all the other crazy emotions running through him, he'd been impressed. It'd been stuff worthy of her SG-1 legends.

"Yes." His eyes sought towards the hangar bay exit. No sign of Sam yet, but if the Council's decision on the thrusters were any indication she might turn up any minute.

There was a moment of silence, and then Larrin said, "So it was the two of you, huh?"

"Wh—"

"No need to deny it, Sheppard. It's all over your soppy face." John opened his mouth indignantly – he was not _soppy! –_ but she headed him off with a sigh. "Guess it makes sense. I haven't seen her smile like she did yesterday for a long time."

John closed his mouth and looked away. Inside the puddle jumper, the containers were now stacked up neatly and secured, with just enough space to wiggle past on one side. Larrin's crew returned to their other duties, leaving just the two of them. Shifting on his feet, John pushed his hands deep into his pockets and paced a few steps, restless.

"What was it like? To be with someone you…"

Larrin's voice was quiet, hesitant. John glanced at her. There was an unspoken conflict in her eyes, a mix of vulnerability and fierce severity. Two people in one, struggling with each other. He looked away, feeling uncomfortable. He'd never really seen the vulnerable side to Larrin.

"It's…complicated." Leaning against the hull of the puddle jumper, John crossed his arms. He eyed Larrin from underneath his brows. "We're not together now."

"Your home world?" Larrin raised an eyebrow, showing a surprising amount of insight for a self-proclaimed casual encounters kind of woman. John nodded reluctantly, his jaw tightening a little at the memories of the harsh looks Sam had given him up until they broke things off. "Sorry."

"That's life. Shit happens."

"And now?"

"We're friends." Larrin only stared at him. "We're _friends_ ," John repeated, a little forcibly. He pushed off the hull of the puddle jumper and glanced at his watch again. She had to be running late now. He was starting to get anxious to leave, if only to get away from the things he saw in Larrin's eyes. "Not to mention she's my CO."

Larrin scoffed and shook her head. "You're a damn idiot, Sheppard."

Without any further remark, Larrin turned and disappeared from sight. John remained outside the puddle jumper with a large confused frown on his face, wondering what the hell had just happened.

* * *

Seeing the Jumper come into view amidst the other transports, Sam felt her pace quicken just a little. She smiled widely when she saw John in the pilot's seat, headphones on, his eyes fixed on something she couldn't see. He looked lost in thought until he noticed her approach and startled slightly.

"All done?" he asked after she'd shut the back hatch and squeezed past the stack of containers in the back compartment. He didn't quite meet her eyes, something that puzzled her, but Sam let it go. She was too jazzed.

"Yep. Hashed out some important things with the Council," she said as she dropped down into the front passenger seat. Fastening her seat belt, she picked up the fruit John had brought her yesterday from the Saelin and bit into it with relish. "They've got things to sort out on their own, but they've shown a lot of interest in the Ascalon. I think I might get them on board in helping to build a better power source than the one we'd originally planned." She swallowed and looked at the fruit. "This is really sweet. What'd the Saelin call it?"

" _Pation_ ," John said, putting his mp3 player and headphones away. He placed his hands on the controls and brought the Jumper to life. The HUD screen popped up, immediately marking the other Ancient vehicles and devices in the vicinity. A disembark vector was laid in within a second. "And the Genii issue?"

Sam swallowed another bite, drops of fruit juice running down her fingers. "Settled, for now. They're not open for cooperating with them yet, but they're going to think about meeting them at some point to discuss the thefts. I'll check in with them in a week or so. They have to discuss it in a forum first."

"Along with a couple of other things, most likely," John said sardonically. Sam smiled and made an affirmative sound as she continued to eat the _pation_ fruit.

John steered the Jumper through the hangar bay and out through the now open bay doors. The Traveler fleet was largely diminished. Only the Ancient warship and a couple of larger ships remained. It seemed a far less intimidating sight than the one that'd greeted them upon their arrival.

"I hope they'll get their house in order soon," Sam said, staring at the fleet before the Jumper turned away and left only the dark of space in their sights. "It'd be so much easier…"

"Life's not easy, though." John's voice was soft. "Things happen when the rules of the game change. Some for the better and some…" He left the rest unsaid, but Sam knew. Why he was suddenly turning philosophical, though, she had no idea.

Swallowing the last fruit bite, Sam sucked on her fingers to get the sticky juice off and then wiped her hands on her pants. Outside the windscreen, the spacegate came into view in the distance; a metallic ring barely reflecting the nearby sun's light.

Sam reached out to dial the gate only to find John's hand on hers, halting her. She looked at him in confusion.

"We're going to need to talk sometime." Although not looking at her, John's expression was dark and fierce. "About us."

It was like a bucket of cold water thrown over her head. Sam tensed up and she became acutely aware that John was still holding her hand firmly. The lingering taste of the sweet fruit disappeared, replaced by a sudden dry mouth.

"I thought…" Sam didn't know what to say. This'd always been something they _couldn't_ talk about. The unspoken words in the _Daedalus_ infirmary two weeks ago had only been further proof of that. Heart starting to pound in her chest, she cleared her throat. "Um, okay… _Now_?"

"I heard you last night." John's voice became tinged with pain as he sat back, releasing his hold on her hand. He stared outside into the blackness of space, jaw clenched tightly.

Sam froze. "…I hoped you wouldn't."

"Yeah, well, I did." He played with the edge of his pants pocket, probably because he didn't have his golf ball handy. His expression darkened. "It's hard. Being together with you and not…not being able to…" Whatever he intended to say, he left it at that, his expression turning frustrated.

Sam thought she understood, though. Sometimes, the pull towards him was too great; too painful. Like every fibre of her being wanted to connect to him, only to be held back by a steel thread that was growing weaker by the day. "…Me too."

For a long while, neither of them spoke, the distant spacegate's slow drift outside the windscreen the only movement. Inside her chest, Sam's heart beat furiously, thumping its way up into her throat. Shivers began to run down her spine and she suddenly felt cold.

Not able to leave it at that, Sam broke the silence. "Do you regret it? Us being more than…" She didn't know if she really wanted to know the answer, but they'd gotten this far. She didn't know if they'd ever have the chance again.

"…Sometimes." John's voice was quiet, his expression solemn. He turned and stared at her, his eyes deep pools of black. "You made me care, Sam. I can't turn it off, even if I sometimes wish I could."

Tears welled up in Sam's eyes but didn't fall. "I'm sorry. I really messed us up."

John's eyes softened and he sighed. "Wasn't all you. I played my part. Not to mention we were in a pretty lousy situation…" He paused, staring back into space again, and his voice lowered almost to a whisper. "I wouldn't mind a friend, though."

Recognising his attempt at reaching out, at doing his part to salvage this, Sam smiled and blinked away her tears. "Me neither. I'm…" She hesitated, the truth of her next words making her go very still. "I'm running a little low on those right now."

The comment made him look at her and she saw in his eyes that he was painfully aware that while he'd kept the majority of his friends on Atlantis, she'd had her majority back on Earth. Her breath hitched when he offered his hand, no hesitance at all, staying true to his word.

Swallowing the lump in her throat, Sam reached out and intertwined their fingers, and the touch was warm and comforting. It dispelled the cold that'd suddenly set into her bones.

"I still care about you too." Her words were strangled, but they were finally out. A wave of relief rushed over her, and for a moment the elephant in the room seemed diminished.

Then tension lines appeared on John's face, and something began to swirl in his dark eyes before he looked away, his lips becoming thin lines.

 _I messed up again._ The thought ran through Sam's panicked mind and she hardly dared to breathe as John's jaw began to clench tightly. In her hand, his had become like ice.

"One step at a time." The words were almost gruff, but there was something about the way he squeezed her hand once and then let go that didn't send Sam plunging straight into the pit of her stomach. Instantly, her mind snapped her back to that fateful day last year…

* * *

_A wide happy, scared grin filled her entire expression. John returned it, so much wider and honest than the one he usually gave people, and it felt like that moment right before an F-302 take-off when her body was locked between weightlessness and gravity. The only thing that kept her anchored was his hand in hers._

_"So…" John began. Behind him, the setting sun reflected off the balcony in a wonderful display of reds and yellows. It made his eyes twinkle. "One step at a time?"_

_Exhilarated and giddy like a teenager, Sam squeezed his hand. "One step at a time."_

* * *

Tears welled up in Sam's eyes. She didn't dare ask if the words were a coincidence. John had put his hands on the control and now waited, still not looking at her.

Pulling herself together, Sam took a deep breath and reached over to input the gate address for Tirana. Moments later, the spacegate in the distance burst to life.

The rest of the trip back to Tirana was conducted in silence. As they touched down in the forest clearing some distance from the stargate, John finally looked at her. Not with frustration nor with love, but with that whole range of emotions that constituted the complexity of their connection.

Still unsure what to think, Sam gave him a smile nevertheless and nodded. "One step at a time."

It seemed to be enough. While John powered down the puddle jumper, Sam got to her feet and edged past the stack of containers in the back compartment. She felt depraved for air. The atmosphere was too thick inside. Hitting the door release, she watched green trees fill her entire vision…until someone else stepped into her line of sight.

"Daniel?" She frowned. "What're you doing here?"

A huge grin split Daniel's face in half. "She's awake, Sam."

* * *

 **Next:** "Louder than words."


	22. DAY 280-287

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, actions speak louder than words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to alicesandra for invaluable feedback!

* * *

**TWENTY-ONE | "Louder than words."**

_"Right actions in the future are the best apologies for bad actions in the past."_ **– Tryon Edwards**

* * *

**DAY 280**

Woolsey was late. That much seemed apparent when he entered the operations centre and saw the Tikwee official had already seated herself inside Xiaoyi's office. Ignoring the looks directed his way from the technicians, he hurried the last few metres and entered the room without knocking.

The two women's conversation halted and both turned to stare at him.

"Mr Woolsey." Without pausing, Envoy Ypresa rose to her feet gracefully, today's suit grey and clear-cut, her red hair braided back into a tight bun. As ever, nothing was out of place. Every action was as deliberate as the next.

"Envoy Ypresa, I'm sorry I am late." He shook her hand, her grip firm in return. Then, he sent an apologetic look at Xiaoyi, whose face was cut from stone as she removed a nondescript folder from her desktop into one of the drawers. The action had become familiar by now, but Woolsey had learned to play along.

"Not at all," Ypresa said, gesturing to Xiaoyi. "We were just discussing the latest news. Yesterday, the Wraith hit two of our trading partners simultaneously."

Woolsey froze. "The ZPM-powered Hive ship?"

"No." From behind the desk, Xiaoyi shook her head as she sat forward with her hands folded. "The human colonies are left intact, so we believe it must be one of the other factions. However, larger amounts of the population were culled and the reports say even children were taken."

An icy shiver ran down Woolsey's spine and his expression grew serious. "That is horrible." He sent Ypresa a sideward glance, presuming this must be the reason for her rather unexpected visit. "Does the Administration have any thoughts on this?"

Ypresa nodded, one corner of her mouth raised slightly higher than the other. "Yes. Aid has already been sent to those hit, but that is not why I came here." She paused. "We have another ally – the Aleira – that is in more immediate need. For the past few months, their colony has been ravaged by earthquakes that are increasing in frequency and force. Given your people's scientific advances and resources, we hoped you would be able to help."

"I dispatched a Jumper earlier," Xiaoyi said without preamble. "The readings show that the Aleira colony is situated right next to a stratovolcano in its active state. With that type of volcano, an eruption could happen quite suddenly with the potential to be ten times worse than Pompeii."

"Which means that action should be taken sooner rather than later," Woolsey surmised, eying Xiaoyi carefully. She'd been reserved in matters of humanitarian help previously, but from the way she acted now, he guessed the matter was already decided in the Aleira's favour. It pleased him.

"Exactly, Mr Woolsey." Ypresa smiled and sat down in one of the comfy chairs, hands on top of her crossed knees. "Can we count on your vote on the council?"

"Of course." If there were two things Woolsey had learned from his years at SGC, it was that in this large universe they were now part of, they couldn't get far without friends, and sometimes, actions spoke louder than words.

He sat down in the second chair and looked from Ypresa to Xiaoyi. "So, how should we do this?"

Xiaoyi leaned forward on the desktop. "The logical choice is evacuation. According to the Ancient database, only the equator of the planet is habitable, which will be affected by the eruption, so we will have to find a suitable planet off-world."

"The Administration is willing to let the Aleirians settle on Tikwa 5, one of our smaller, agrarian colonies," Ypresa said. "If that is their wish, of course. We do not want to force them."

"Given that time is of the essence, they may not have any choice." Xiaoyi's tone was matter-of-factly.

Woolsey hesitated. "Do we have any approximate timeline on the volcanic eruption?"

"Dr Takahashi said it could be today or it could be two weeks from now. A stratovolcano can be unpredictable." A shadow seemed to cross Xiaoyi's face before she glanced briefly at the Tikwee envoy, then back at Woolsey, who'd tensed slightly. "Since _Daedalus_ is unavailable right now, we will have to evacuate them through the stargate. The Aleirians will probably wish to bring as much of their belongings and equipment as possible in order to facilitate resettlement."

"Our soldiers are already standing by." Assuming a business face, Ypresa picked up a folder from a briefcase she had nearby. "This is a proposed plan for how to proceed with the evacuation itself. Based on the current population level and the village's distance to the stargate, we believe it would take approximately two weeks to evacuate every Aleirian. Shorter if your people could provide additional aid."

Ignoring the uneasy feeling in his stomach, Woolsey looked over the plan first, which was stamped in even letters on thick paper. His eyebrows rose slightly. "You certainly came prepared."

"We've been aware of this issue for quite some time, Mr Woolsey," Ypresa said, giving him a polite smile. "The Aleirians are one of our friends. We've been worried."

Humming in response, Woolsey finished reading the plan, then looked up at Xiaoyi. The shadow was gone from her eyes now, but his uneasy feeling wasn't. "It looks feasible. I'm sure the rest of the council will agree." He paused as he handed the folder over to her. "I would like to know more about this volcano, however. Perhaps it is possible to put up some kind of warning system, just in case?"

As if caught off guard, Xiaoyi blinked. "I did not think of that."

"If memory serves me correctly, Dr Swan has some background in geothermal energy…" Woolsey eyed her carefully, gauging her reaction. Thinking back, this wasn't the first time he'd seen that shadow in her eyes, nor gotten the sensation that something—

"I believe you're right." Putting the folder down on the desk, Xiaoyi clasped her hands tightly. Now, her eyes betrayed nothing but confidence. "I will have Dr McKay bring her to the meeting."

On instinct, Woolsey nodded and smiled. "Good." The odd little feeling, however, stayed with him.

* * *

**DAY 285**

Checking his watch, Daniel put away his now empty cup of coffee on the corner of his desk and crossed the room to the Ancient-style couch overlooking the balcony.

"Sam." He leaned down and shook her shoulder. There was no immediate response. He shook her harder. " _Sam._ Wake-up call."

Sam began to stir, the blanket he'd thrown over her during the night slipping down onto the floor. Daniel picked it up, chuckling slightly as Sam groaned in protest.

"Morning," he said once her eyes cracked open a notch. He started folding up the blanket. "A bed would've probably been better."

Running a hand across her sleep-heavy eyes, Sam hummed in agreement. Daniel put the folded-up blanket on a nearby chair and moved into the small kitchenette in the corner to fetch a new cup of coffee. Powder coffee leftovers, but still. Better than the weird concoction the Tikwee had introduced in Atlantis.

By the time he returned, Sam had sat up and was tiredly undoing her braid, which had gotten all messed up during the night. She gratefully accepted the cup and leaned back on the couch, sighing.

Daniel eyed her critically. "When'd you get in?"

"Dunno. Late." Sam inhaled the scent of the coffee before sipping it. Her eyes closed in satisfaction.

Although Daniel wanted to point out that Reika was _fine_ and didn't need constant supervision, he knew it was a lost cause and instead busied himself with finding his other shoe. He eventually found it underneath a pile of books and pulled it on.

When he looked up, he saw Sam staring at him intently, more alert now. "What's with the get-up? You heading out on a mission?"

Daniel finished tying his shoelaces and rose up to his feet, brushing imaginary dust off his BDU pants. "Yes, actually. They want me to assist on Aleira. Apparently, some of the natives refuse to leave. Woolsey and Xiaoyi thought I could help convince them."

"Huh." Sam gave him another once-over and then withdrew her eyes.

"What?" Daniel stopped, staring at her. A shadow seemed to pass across her face.

"Nothing. I was just surprised. You haven't been on a mission in a while," Sam said and took another sip of her coffee. As if realising he was still sceptical, she smiled at him. "It's good. Feels like old times." She winked. "You've always had a _special_ way with the locals."

Daniel snorted. "Jack said the same thing. Just for the record, I _don't_ have a girl in every town."

"I know." Sam grinned and leaned forward, putting her now empty cup on the coffee table. Then, she got to her feet and stretched. Several of her joints popped in response.

Daniel winced slightly. "You know, I'll bet your bed is much comfier than that old couch." Sam froze. Noticing, Daniel sighed. It was becoming a recurring thing lately. "Sorry. It's not that you're crowding the place. I just… You seem like you're avoiding your old quarters for some reason."

Sam didn't answer immediately. For a long while, she looked down at her hands, her gaze distant. Then, she met his eyes. "It doesn't feel _right_ anymore."

"Because…?"

"Just because," Sam said, clearly growing irritated – fast – and crossing her arms tightly.

Understanding that it was as much he was going to get out of her at this point, Daniel stepped back and picked up his BDU jacket. "I probably need to get going. Feel free to crash here tonight if you want to when you get back from Tirana. My door's always open."

A guilty look crossed Sam's face and she sighed deeply. "I'm sorry, Daniel. I just…got a lot on my mind lately. A lot of things to do."

He wanted to say that 'lately' stretched back almost nine months, but refrained. Instead, he gave her a smile. "It's okay, Sam. If you want to tell me, you'll tell me."

Sam gave him an apologetic look, but what for, he wasn't entirely sure. He decided to ignore it, though, after taking a glance at his watch. There were only twenty minutes left until the day shift left, and he still had to get his equipment and supplies.

"Anything you want me to pass on to John?" Daniel asked as he started walking towards the door, thinking of Reika. When there was no reply, he looked back and saw Sam quickly blink as if startled.

"Uh, no. Nothing new to report." She gave him a reassuring smile, wide and brilliant – and utterly fake. Twelve years or so had helped him learn the difference between Samantha Carter's many smiles.

_Uh huh. Definitely something going on._

Holding back a sigh, Daniel reiterated _'she'll tell me eventually'_ – a familiar mantra of his lately – and left.

* * *

It was strange to see the ocean like this again, or at least _an_ ocean. The waves crashed against the white sands of M5H-344, the weather quite warm and comfortable. Apart from the slight sulphuric scent in the air, it could be a paradise. It could be Earth.

Standing on top of the hill where the Aleira's stargate was located, dressed in a borrowed BDU, Shen felt a bit out of her comfort zone. Woolsey, on the other hand, looked at home in his own uniform pair. So did Envoy Ypresa, although wearing a much more elegant ensemble than suitable for this type of mission. Not that Shen would say that out loud.

Together, the three of them watched the long line of Aleirians trudging up towards the stargate with their carts, flocks and belongings, before being sent through the open wormhole to Tikwa 5.

For a people being saved from their certain doom, few looked grateful. Their steps were heavy and many looked back to where their village laid nestled amidst rolling hills. Behind it, the stratovulcano responsible for the rescue mission vented steams of gas that rose high into the air. Every now and then, the ground shook.

It wouldn't be long now. Soon, nothing would remain here. This place would be lost and uninhabitable for many years.

In some way, Shen could understand the Aleira. They were losing their home. But at least _they_ had time to prepare.

"Colonel Sheppard," Woolsey called out in greeting as the man in question appeared amidst the next group of Aleirians.

Reaching the summit, Sheppard put down two small children he'd been carrying up the hill, exchanged a few words with their mother, and then turned towards Shen and the others. The rest of his team of Atlantean and Tikwee soldiers continued to urge the natives along.

"How are they progressing, Colonel?" Ypresa asked first, her tone a bit overly positive for such a situation. Shen was tempted to shoot her a look, but refrained.

"As well as could be expected." Having his hands free now, Sheppard shoved them into his pockets, not quite meeting any of their eyes. "Jackson's still talking to the group that won't leave."

A flash of annoyance mixed with something else – something she'd repressed for a very long time – flared up inside Shen. "Hopefully," she said in a low voice, "he'll talk some sense into them. They _cannot_ stay here."

Sheppard's eyes narrowed slightly, but he didn't comment. Perhaps he'd finally learned not to question her. "I'll check in with him later. Right now, I need to get these people through the gate. If you'll excuse me."

Without further ado, Sheppard turned and retraced his steps to the children he'd carried earlier, who were waiting in line beneath the stargate dais. Shen watched him crouch down and talk to them in hushed tones, and while she couldn't hear what he said, she saw the grins spread on the children's faces. Others in the vicinity smiled too, the heavy oppressive air of sadness lifted for a moment.

Suddenly nauseous, Shen looked pointedly away at the ocean again. It was calm, as opposed to the stormy waters that were building up outside Atlantis at this moment. Images flashed through her mind of happier times; smiles and laughter, and splashes of water on the shores of the Beidaihe with her parents.

The parents she'd left behind.

"It is a shame this beautiful place will be lost." Ypresa's voice broke abruptly through her reminiscences, much closer than expected. Shen blinked, her eyesight a little foggy. Realising she was close to tears, she turned her head angrily.

Once she felt sufficiently in control, Shen met Ypresa's eyes. Woolsey, thankfully, was nowhere in sight.

"Yes. A shame." The hint at anger in her own voice surprised Shen – and Ypresa, it seemed – and she quickly amended, "This place could have survived for a long time yet."

"Life can be quite unfair." Ypresa's statement was unmoved, almost exposed, almost a reflection.

_Politics,_ Shen reminded herself when she felt a different kind of anger flare, one filled with disgust.

Starting in the distance, the ground trembled again, the feel and sounds of it reminding her of the Ruinchang earthquake five years ago. The memories threatened to return once more, but different; less happy than those of the Beidaihe. Memories she would rather suppress.

Looking back at the Aleirians, Shen spotted Woolsey helping one of the elderly step up the stargate dais to the open wormhole. Her voice became like ice. "It doesn't have to be."

"No, that is true." The Envoy's expression curved into another of her amiable smiles. She turned to look back at the Aleirians, her back straight. She didn't need to elaborate. They both knew what this was really about.

* * *

"Tia, I beg you to reconsider. If you stay here when it erupts, the ash coming from the volcano will kill you within minutes." Running out of options, Daniel pointed to the large cave paintings on the rocks around them. "Did not the Great Spirit say 'waste not even the smallest thing created'? You have a chance to survive this, to let your children grow up to live full lives. _Please._ "

On the other side of the campfire, the white-haired woman named Tia smiled at him, unfazed. "Daniel Jackson, the Great Spirit also said 'man is not separate from the land'." She gestured around the large cave. "This is where our ancestors were born. This is where our children were born. If it is time for the land to join the Great Spirit, then we will follow. This world is but one of many."

The rest of the Aleirans seated around the campfire, ranging from infant to elderly, nodded in agreement. Despite hours of work, he had gotten nowhere. Not even an inch.

Daniel sighed and stared at the wooden cup in his hand, which was engraved with beautiful carvings. The Aleirian society was filled with cultural and artistic items like this, all tracing back to this very cave he was sitting in. The Cave of the Great Spirit, it was called: the place where spirits crossed the divide between this world and the spirit world.

About to open his mouth to continue the discussion, Daniel spotted silhouettes of soldiers moving up in the entrance. Seeing how the Aleirians around the campfire had already engaged in one of their quiet communal prayers, Daniel knew he wouldn't get anywhere else at the moment and left to greet the soldiers.

"Jackson." Sheppard's face was covered in shadows before he stepped into the circles of light emanating from the numerous campfires inside the cave. Whether in respect of the place or the quiet people inside it, he kept his voice hushed. "How's it going?"

"Not well." Disappointed in his own efforts, Daniel grimaced and shifted on his feet. "They are very determined to stay. Some believe they will be protected here and others wish to follow whatever fate is in store for this place." He exhaled heavily. "Scientific reasoning has very little influence on them, and I know too little about their way of life and culture to convince them in other ways."

Sheppard stared around at the groups of people gathered inside the cave. There were almost a hundred people here. Not a majority of the population, but still too many to simply write off. Daniel wondered what kind of thoughts went through the lieutenant colonel's head.

"It'll be another day before the rest are through the stargate," Sheppard said eventually. "After that, Xiaoyi will order everyone back to base."

"Even if there are still people here?" Daniel's eyes widened. "That's—"

"I don't like it either, Jackson." Sheppard's eyes glinted and his lips thinned in frustration. "But this is a joint mission with the Tikwee, and Ypresa will pull everyone out tomorrow. No exceptions. Xiaoyi will do the same." Shifting the weight of the weapon in his arms, Sheppard straightened. "You've got 'till then to convince them. We're not allowed to use force."

Although he agreed with the latter, Daniel blew a breath in annoyance. "Okay. I'll get back to it."

* * *

**DAY 286**

Standing in the entrance to the Cave of the Great Spirit, Daniel kicked the ground. Loose rocks burst outwards, rolling down the slope to the forest below. Out in the distance, he'd seen the stargate close some time ago and not reignite. There were no more people going up the hill. The Aleirian village was empty, the fields beyond left unattended. Almost all of them had left for a second chance.

He was out of time. Even now, Sheppard and his team were on their way to pick them up. Behind them, the volcano was hissing, shaking the ground much more frequently. Any minute, they might get a call from the Tikwee scientist in charge of Dr Swan's early warning system.

"I don't understand." Daniel was ashamed to admit it. He was an archaeologist but also something of an anthropologist. This felt like a colossal failure. "If they leave now, they can still _live_. Why can't they _see_ that?"

"That is not the issue." The soft voice was comforting, soothing. "This is their way of life; what they believe in. It is not for us to judge them."

Daniel sighed. "I know. It just…it's such a waste." He looked up at the blue sky where white wispy clouds drifted by almost lazily, and suffered another flash of frustration. "There are so many people out there right now who would jump at a chance like this. It seems unfair to them."

"Yes, it does, but you must focus on _these_ people, Daniel, and _this_ moment." The other presence stepped up next to him and put her hand on his arm. Turning, Daniel met Teyla's eyes. She smiled at him, seeing straight through him. "A person's belief is sacred. It must be respected. However, we do what we can. It is the way it must be."

Daniel touched her hand. When Sheppard had shown up with her this morning, he'd been stunned and then immensely grateful. Teyla had a way with people and she understood people in Pegasus in a way Daniel had yet to learn. Milky Way natives he could handle because he often had a common frame of reference. In Pegasus, however, he felt almost like a floundering brute.

"You're right," he said, feeling her calmness transfer to him.

The tremors came again, growing in intensity until the ground itself was shaking back and forth. They stumbled close to the wall, pressing themselves up against it as the world outside changed a little more. Trees snapped and crashed to the ground. The waves were pushed back until they returned with vengeance. Rocks tumbled down the mountainside, flying past the cave entrance high into the air.

After several minutes, the tremors stopped. Daniel found himself shielding Teyla against the wall, and stepped back a little sheepishly, waving away dust from the dislodged rocks that'd tumbled by. Inside the cave, someone seemed to be shouting.

"We should check if someone were injured," Daniel said. Teyla nodded, and they walked carefully down the small incline to the main cave below. Once inside, they spread out and assessed the damage.

The only apparent injuries were some small cuts from rocks that'd dislodged from the ceiling. Tia and her daughter were attending those hurt, pressing pieces of cloth against the cuts, and muttering strange phrases of prayer.

"Tia, this cave will not stand forever." Daniel crouched next to the older woman as one injured replaced the other by her side. Opposite of him, Teyla approached her too. "If the ceiling caves in with you still inside…"

"We know, Daniel Jackson." But the lines on Tia's face were more creased than before as she wiped blood off the cheek of a little boy of about five or six years.

"The Great Spirit urges you to protect all life," Teyla said, her tone gentle and hushed. "Does that not include your children? Will you allow them to follow you _now_ , when their spirits have barely matured?"

Tia hesitated, the cloth in her hand raised over the boy's cheek. She closed her eyes heavily and exhaled. "Our spirits have existed since the First Morning. We are just one life of many. Old or young, the Great Spirit does not discriminate."

Daniel held back a curse. "Tia, your children may be old in spirit, but they have yet to experience what _this_ life has to offer. Do they not deserve that chance?"

Slowly, Tia sat back on her heels, looking much older. She looked at her daughter and the faces of the other Aleirians in the cave, who seemed to pay closer attention to them now. Many looked more worried than before.

Then, the old woman sighed once more. "It is not my place to say."

* * *

The storm was beating against the windows of Atlantis's gateroom when Sam exited the stargate ahead of the soldiers who had been on Tirana's evening shift. As the security team crossed to the side and started handing off their weapons to the SOs, Sam noticed Woolsey and Xiaoyi standing at the end of the platform, looking stony and anxious respectively.

Instantly on guard, Sam approached them. "Miss Xiaoyi, Mr Woolsey."

"Colonel," Woolsey greeted in return. Xiaoyi said nothing, but gave her a scrutinising look. Woolsey gestured to the overnight bag in Sam's hand. "You're here to visit the young girl again – Reika, was it?"

Sam nodded. Something about their posture told her they weren't waiting for her. That made her relax a little. She'd been worried word had gotten out about the tests she'd run earlier today on the stargate satellite.

Feeling obliged to engage in casual conversation now that she'd approached them, Sam asked: "How's it going with the Aleira's relocation?"

"Very well," Woolsey said, glancing briefly at Xiaoyi, who still kept quiet. "The majority of the population has been safely escorted to M1W-891, or Tikwa 5 as the Administration has designated it. Some, however, could not be convinced to leave."

Sam recalled what Daniel told her yesterday and held back a sigh. He'd be affected by that. She'd make him her first stop.

"There will be a celebration later once the Tikwee delegation arrives." Woolsey smiled, albeit a little humourlessly. "Been a while since we had one of those. It'll be good for morale, though."

Sadly, Sam had to agree. Before she could add anything, however, the stargate burst to life.

"If you'll excuse us, Colonel." Xiaoyi's first spoken words were polite, yet clearly a dismissal.

Not about to get into an argument – she realised there'd be no point right now – Sam just nodded and said her goodbyes. She stopped after a few metres, though, and looked back.

The Tikwee Envoy, Ypresa, stepped out of the event horizon along with a number of dress uniform-clad soldiers carrying cases of bottles and food. She was dressed rather fancily in a grey and black dress, her voluminous red hair cascading down her shoulders. In her hand, she held a briefcase emblazoned with the Tikwa Administration's logo.

"It has happened." Ypresa's tone was solemn. "The volcano erupted little more than an hour ago."

Woolsey sighed loudly. "God rest their souls."

* * *

Despite the raging lightening storm outside the city windows, despite the grim reality that seventy-three people had died today, the people inside Little Chow were having a good time. Well, most of them.

Daniel, for one, couldn't look at the happy faces around them anymore. It made him nauseous. Of course, that could also be due to the unfamiliar dark Tikwee brew currently in his hand. He wondered what would happen if he just smashed it. It wasn't him – he knew that – but at least it would've made an impact, been some physical evidence of how wretched the world had gotten.

_I only managed to save fifteen. Fifteen!_ He could still see the faces of Tia and those of her people who chose to stay behind; he could still hear the mutual cries as grandmothers and grandfathers said goodbye to their children and grandchildren.

Hotness burst into his stomach again, making his knuckles whiten around the Tikwee brew. _It's still too many. It's still—_

"I see they have made no progress."

Teyla's sudden sigh drew him out of his murky thoughts. Blinking, Daniel followed her stare and saw Sam and Sheppard skirting eyes at each other across the room from separate tables. She was sitting with Matthews and Ramirez from Tirana, he with Ronon, McKay and a couple of Tikwee soldiers.

For a moment, Daniel didn't know what Teyla was saying exactly. Then, as it dawned on him, he sputtered into his drink. "Ex-um- _what?_ " Maybe it was the alcohol turning tricks on him, but… He lowered his voice to an almost hiss. "You _know_?"

"That they have been a couple? Yes." Glancing back at Sam and Sheppard, Teyla smiled gently. "I could tell by the way they looked at each other." Her smile fell. "But that has changed now."

"Uh…yeah." Daniel shook his head, still surprised. An odd sensation washed over him. "I'm sorry, I just… You know? You really know?"

Turning back fully, Teyla smirked. "Yes, Daniel. I have known about them for a very long time. John, I admit, gave it away. He was always a solitary man. But after Sam came to Atlantis…he changed. Subtly, perhaps, but enough."

"She did too." For some reason, Daniel felt lighter with just that sole confession. Like he was connected in some way and no longer alone. He smiled, and then glanced at Sam, who was looking darkly into her half-full glass. His momentary thrill disappeared, and he released a sigh. "Did you ever tell him you knew?"

"No, I figured he would tell me when he was ready." Teyla sighed too, meeting his eyes earnestly. "It is painful to see him this way."

"Tell me about it," Daniel muttered. "I don't know what to do anymore. They're both so _damn_ stubborn."

"I am tempted to give John a more…physical lesson." Teyla's eyes twinkled a little, making Daniel chuckle unexpectedly. He'd heard of the famous Bantos rods fights between Teyla and Sheppard.

"Sam would kick my ass," he said, groaning dramatically. "I'm terrible in hand-to-hand."

Teyla laughed. The sound was wondrous.

Smiling, Daniel pushed away his Tikwee brew and left it standing on the edge of the table. A more dominant thought settled in his mind. "If you've known about them for so long…" He hesitated. "What were they like? Before…everything happened?"

Leaning closer as if divulging a secret, Teyla smiled. "Happy."

* * *

**DAY 287**

_Little Chow_ was almost filled to the brim and full of life this morning. Daniel was a bit surprised, given how extremely drunk some people had gotten last night; it'd been a long time since "proper" alcohol had been in circulation on Atlantis. All around, however, people laughed and chatted in high voices, their entire beings full of energy and optimism. Others looked like Sam, though: extremely hung over.

Half amused, Daniel watched her wince as one of the nearby groups cackled with laughter. However, his mood changed when Sam perused the room surreptitiously shortly after. He knew who she was looking for.

" _I wish they could move on,"_ Teyla had said late last night as they walked back towards the gateroom so she could return to New Athos. _"It goes, I think, for many of your people. You have survived long enough. It is time to start living, to build, nurture and grow roots. This,"_ she'd gestured to Atlantis, _"is your home now."_

Sam suddenly turned her head, blushing. So she'd met Sheppard's eyes. Again. And all she could do was look away. Daniel almost rolled his eyes.

Noticing, Sam gave him a glare. "Stop it. I'm fine." She winced and touched her temple. "Regretting that final drink last night, though. The Tikwee brew certainly packs a punch."

Daniel only raised an eyebrow.

xxx

" _It's not that easy," he responded to Teyla's statement, annoyed. "Our whole existence began on Earth. Our history, our beliefs, our way of life – even our differences and similarities; it is all a part of who we are. Our identity. We can't just leave it behind. We have to—to—" The words wouldn't come to him._

" _To stay true," Teyla suggested._

" _Yeah."_

" _Like Tia and her people." Her tone was careful, her eyes searching his, anticipating his reaction._

_Stunned, Daniel halted. An icy shiver ran down his back. The murkiness at the back of his head, although half forgotten during their pleasant conversations earlier, wrestled with the new sensation._

_The thought hadn't occurred to him. He'd just seen their pointless deaths, the unfulfilled potential. He'd been…narrow-minded._

_He hated that._

_Slowly, Daniel continued to walk, Teyla keeping pace with him. He exhaled heavily. "Yeah…like them. I guess we're not that different after all."_

" _Except," Teyla added with a smile, "like the majority of the Aleira, you do not simply accept your fate. You choose life. You choose to fight."_

_Smiling against his will, Daniel met her eyes. "Yes."_

xxx

For a long while, Daniel watched Sam's internal struggle as she shifted her stare between the lightening storm outside Little Chow's windows and the man at the other side of the room. Finally, he sighed.

"You've got to stop this."

"Huh?" Sam frowned, startled out of her thoughts.

"You can't sit on the sidelines anymore and just make yourself more miserable." Daniel's voice grew hard. No more coddling. No more patience. He had to summon his internal Jack and give her some tough love. "It's time to get back into the game, Sam. You need to talk to him, or kiss him, I dunno. Just…do _something."_

" _Daniel,"_ Sam hissed, glancing frantically around them in case someone were eavesdropping. Her cheeks, however, were tinged pink. Embarrassment, he guessed. Well, they'd talked in code for too long. Some things needed to get out into the light if they were ever going to get past this.

"What'd you think the guys would've said if they saw you now?" He raised an eyebrow. Sam looked stunned, her mouth opening and closing several times. "Cam, Vala, Teal'c, Jack…Cassie? Think they'd approve of you being such a coward?"

" _Daniel."_ Her hiss was more like a whisper now, losing strength. "Stop, please. It's… it's not like that."

"Then what?" Daniel sighed and leaned closer for her benefit, aware of the rules that were still in place that necessitated talking in codes. "Help me understand, Sam. Talk to me."

Tears gathered in her eyes as she bit her lip. He reached out and covered her hand in his, squeezing it in encouragement.

"We've…already talked. A little."

"I'm guessing that didn't solve anything," Daniel said, thinking of her sleeping arrangement on his couch lately and the comment that her quarters weren't "right" anymore.

"No. I dunno. Maybe." Sam wiped away the tears from the corners of her eyes and seemed to pull herself a little more together. "He said he wouldn't mind a friend."

"And…you don't want that." It was more of a statement than a question.

"I don't know." Sam sighed. "It's—"

"— complicated," Daniel finished, holding back a groan. The phrase was starting to lose its meaning. Parroted too many times.

He stared out at the stormy morning.

xxx

" _Despite the threat of the Wraith and the losses my people have suffered, I am proud to say I have lived. I have fought, loved, grieved and given birth to a new generation. But most of all, I have stayed true to myself." In the dimness, Teyla gave him another of her beautiful smiles. Honest and bright. "That is the world I wish to provide for Torren."_

xxx

Taking a deep breath, Daniel looked back at the hand he held in his own. "Sam, you made a choice last year that didn't make sense to me for a very long time." He met her eyes, which were bright yet cautious. "But I remember how happy you were the time I visited before Christmas. More relaxed and at ease with everyone. More _you._ "

He paused, choosing his next words carefully. _"_ Then I see you like this – I see _him_ like this – and it makes me feel helpless." Across the table, Sam's eyes shone more brightly. "You need to be honest, to yourself _and_ to him." Daniel squeezed her hand, smiling to cover the sudden thickness in his throat. "Jack and the others would've wanted it. They would've wanted you to be happy."

Never losing eye contact, Sam squeezed his hand in return.

* * *

The short e-mail had been cryptic: just a time and a place. Given the location, though, there was no doubt who was behind it.

John crossed the half-dimmed corridor, the light darker due to the lightening storm outside, and stopped in front of the door at the end. The last time he'd been here, there'd been two guards stationed outside it. Once Xiaoyi took over, that level of security was deemed unnecessary since the room's contents were more of a nostalgic value than vital to the city's survival.

If only she knew.

Running his hand across the control, John waited for the door to slide open before he stepped inside. The lights were brighter within, making him blink for a moment.

He shifted the small box in his hands, suddenly a little nervous. He'd brought it on a whim. It'd been sitting on his desk ever since the Genii mission, untouched, just waiting for the right time. Now could be it.

"Sam?"

"In here." Her voice sounded from deeper into the room. A work light was propped up on some of the stacked SGC-marked containers, pointing down behind them. He rounded the row and found Sam arms-deep in a medium-sized container. She looked up at him and smiled briefly. "I'm on a quest."

"Oh?"

"Reika ran out of crayons. I remembered seeing something like it here…aha!" Triumphantly, Sam withdrew her hand, holding a colourful package. "The day is saved."

John smirked, some of his nervousness melting away. The sight of Sam doing something mundane like this – finding a toy a child would love –made the good memories return. That was the kind of caring he loved about her.

He froze.

Sam, however, was oblivious. She started putting back the things she'd taken out – office supplies – and then closed the lid on the container.

John cleared his throat. "So…you wanted to meet?" He leaned down and helped her put the container back in its shelf. "Something happen to the Ascalon?"

"No, it's fine. The tests are going well. For the most part," she added, grimacing slightly. "Got some trouble with the manoeuvring, but Hailey's working on it. Should be able to meet our deadline with the Travelers in a few weeks."

"Right. Good." John shifted on his feet, fiddling with the small box in the hand he kept behind his back. He didn't quite meet Sam's eyes. When he did, he noticed she barely met his either.

_Great._

An awkward moment passed, then Sam spoke up. "Look, John, I… I need to know something." He looked at her warily. "It's about what we agreed upon when we got back from the Travelers…"

Sam hesitated, rotating the box of crayons between her fingers. The similarity between them in that moment almost made John laugh.

"Here." He held out the small box he'd brought. Whether he did it to stop her from continuing or not, he wasn't sure. He just needed to get it out of his hands before he choked.

"Uh…what's this?" Sam's expression was puzzled. Taking the box, she held it up in front of her uncertainly. John only looked at it, though, so she flipped it open. Her frown deepened when she saw the Rubik's cube.

"It's the one you broke." Scratching the back of his head, John skirted his eyes back to the entrance of the supply room. It'd been a few months, but the night was still crystal clear in his mind. He'd never been so angry with anyone in his life, not even with Kolya.

Recognition flashed in Sam's eyes and her mouth rounded in surprise. Then she blushed, an action that sent John's stomach into a flutter.

"The second row can get a bit stuck, but if you just twist it like this" – he made a motion with his finger – "it should turn eventually."

"You fixed it?" There was a clear shine in Sam's eyes. Almost uncertainly, she gave him a wide smile.

The words failing him, John only nodded and looked back at the entrance. He'd always been better at this: action, gestures, looks. They'd both been. Words had been superfluous most of the time – until things went south and they'd lost that ability.

Now he wondered if maybe they actually had to say the words to make the awkward stares go away.

A sudden motion in the corner of his eye made him tense, but before he could react, he was enveloped in Sam's arms.

The hug was tight, warm and soft. John's muscles strained for a moment, instinct telling him to get the hell out of Dodge...and then something relaxed. He caught the scent of her shampoo – different now that they'd run out of Earth soap, his mind told him – but under that was something familiar. Something unique.

" _Thank you, John._ " The words were mumbled against his neck, sounding choked. Vibrations ran down his back from where her lips stilled against his spine.

His eyes closed. His pulse slowed. Then, John hugged her back. Memories rushed back at him of happier times: of pranks, lazy mornings and late nights in her office.

Recalling what she'd said before his interruption, John brushed his lips against the back of her head, his voice low. "I meant what I said, Sam. One step at a time. Just like last time." He sighed, holding her close. "It might take some time, though."

"I know." The tension in Sam's shoulders eased, her body melting more into his despite the underlying apprehension in their verbal exchange. "I'm…just glad I finally did this." She exhaled softly against the nape of his neck. "I've missed your hugs."

John's lips curved a little. "… Me too."

* * *

Shen glanced around the large room. Wires ran all over it, connecting computers and equipment everywhere. At this late hour, they worked with only a skeleton shift so as to not arouse suspicion. During the day, this room was packed.

She turned back to Dr Takahashi, who'd accepted the briefcase she gave him earlier and was currently sifting through it. "Did they see you?"

"No," the man answered. "I made sure they'd entered the transporter before I moved." He paused and glanced briefly at her. "It wasn't there. I only found boxes of office supplies."

Shen's fists clenched slightly. "She must've hidden it elsewhere in the city then."

"Internal scans turned up empty." Dr Takahashi picked up a small, semi-transparent object and held it up towards the light. "I do not think it is here. Perhaps she brought it to Tirana?"

"No, it has to be here." Shen crossed her arms, annoyance flashing up inside her. Her sources in the mining camp hadn't been able to turn up anything, even after almost six months.

"Then I do not know, Madam Xiaoyi." He caught her look and quickly straightened his back. " _But_ I will redouble my efforts. It could be shielded, so I will modify the scans and try again."

"Make sure you do." Shen narrowed her eyes. If not, this would all have been a waste. Everything she'd done, everything she was considering…utterly pointless. Her eyes went to the open briefcase emblazoned with the Tikwa Administration's logo. "I want those control crystals installed as soon as possible."

"Of course, Madam." Dr Takahashi nodded curtly, turning to wave over another scientist who was standing close by. "I will have my people on it immediately." He handed off the entire briefcase to the other scientist, who then left for a nearby workbench. "As for the Ancient database entry you asked me to look into..."

Shen stilled, a weight sinking down into her stomach. "Yes?"

Dr Takahashi's eyes were dark and knowing. "It's done."

"Good." Despite the smile she gave him, she felt nothing but a dark, bottomless cold. She left before he could see the tears gathering in her eyes.

* * *

" _We received Dagda's emergency beacon, but when_ the Tria _arrived to assist, the city was gone. To this date, we do not know whether it succumbed to the Wraith attack or was swallowed by the volcanic eruption that devastated the continent. In any case, our people are lost, just like this galaxy. It feels wrong to leave, but we have no other choice. We can only hope that Atlantis will someday give the humans here a chance. Maybe even a fighting chance."_

_\- Ancient database entry -_

* * *

**Next:** "There's a time for everything."


	23. DAY 294 - 296 - 301

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "… Be extremely subtle, even to the point of formlessness. Be extremely mysterious, even to the point of soundlessness…"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to alicesandra for invaluable feedback.

****

 

* * *

**TWENTY-TWO | "A time for everything."**

_Prompt: there is a time for everything_

_Music: "Time" by Hans Zimmer (Inception), "Journey to the Line" by Hans Zimmer (The Thin Red Line), and "There is No Plan" by Steve Jablonsky (Transformers: Dark Side of the Moon)_

* * *

**DAY 294**

Things were going according to schedule. The thought pleased her as she passed through the busy production floor of the factory, where the workers were quick yet efficient. A few sneaked glances at her, but were quick to turn away. She approved of that. Time was of the essence. None could be wasted on trivial matters. You either worked or you didn't. That was the rule of law.

"I will be back in two days," she told the man haunting her steps – the manager of the factory. She casually handed back a clipboard where she'd put down her signature on a number of work permits. "Make sure— Ough!"

Three small children pelted across the aisle from the right, almost running into her. Their hands were filled with cloth-covered mechanical parts fresh from the machines. She was forced to halt mid-stride, startled.

"Oi! Get back here, you brats!" The factory manager caught hold of the last child by the scruff of his neck and pulled him forcibly back to stand still in front of her. The other children had quickly disappeared among the many workstations. "Apologise!"

The boy, no more than six or seven, was scrawny and filthy, his work uniform barely a proper fit. On one side of his face was a large bruise. He stared pointedly at the floor, clutching the mechanical parts tightly to his chest. "I'm sorry, Madam Ypresa. Please forgive me."

She wrinkled her nose and looked away briefly. _Orphans._

"You're forgiven. Get back to work," she said, and the boy slunk away for the first few steps before breaking into a run. Around them, work continued as normal, even as more than before sneaked glances their way. Ypresa took a deep breath and straightened her back, then turned to the factory manager with narrowed eyes. "Get your people under control."

The man nodded hastily and bowed out of her path. "Of course, Madam Ypresa. I apologise deeply. The boy will be punished."

"Not like last time, Mr Jolson. We cannot afford to draw any more attention to this place than there already is." Ypresa began to walk again, her heels clicking on the concrete floor. _Especially with the commissioner already inquiring about our sudden influx of advanced resources and Ancient technology,_ she added inwardly.

"Yes, Madam. I will keep that in mind."

They reached the exit and the factory manager unlocked and opened the heavy door for her. She stepped outside into the cool, late evening air. Darkness had already fallen over the factory district, with the Tikwa capitol glittering just above the rooftops in the distance.

"Have a good evening, Madam." The factory manager bowed again and returned inside at Ypresa's dismissive nod.

She turned back towards the street and saw her horse-drawn carriage waiting. The sight was welcome. It had been a long and tiring day. Now, she just wanted to go home to her family and enjoy a glass of wine with her husband before bed.

"Straight home, Rae," Ypresa told her driver as the footman opened the door for her.

"Aye, Madam."

Ypresa stepped inside the dark carriage and settled down, immediately pushing off her high heels and sighing in pleasure. The door closed, the carriage rocked into action and she looked up…

…and caught the flash of a face before someone threw themselves at her from the shadows and knocked her out.

* * *

Tall, broad-shouldered and lean, Commander Rathorn had dark narrow eyes that were set deep in his face. His once neatly trimmed beard was ragged and clumped together in places. His uniform was in tatters, burnt to a crisp at the edges, and hung limply off his shoulders. His breath reeked of alcohol and his eyes of the fiery craziness that burned in the horizon.

"What you need, Captain, is a motivator."

He stood in the shadows, Carter kneeling at his feet, naked, bound, bruised. A single stream of light shone down from above. Their features were jagged and covered in black.

Hailey fought against the restraints, her own hand twitching for the weapon she normally wore. She knew what was coming. This time, she would stop it. She just had to—

_Bang!_

"No!" Hailey cried out hoarsely and stared as Carter crumbled to the ground, gasping for breath, the sound like an awful rattle. Blood burst out like a red mist, then started to pool beneath her. Anger came easily, red-hot and fiery as the horizon. "You fucking _bastard_! I'll kill you!"

"She is wearing armour, isn't she?" The man, grinning, stepped around the prone form of Hailey. He reloaded his weapon and cocked it. Fire shone in his eyes. "Cooperate, Captain. That's all we ask."

Cold, clammy hands on her neck. A pointed nail scraping down from her chin to her racing pulse. Another presence emerged out of the darkness, its cold breath like death.

"That's not going to work, sir," the new, raspy voice said. Female. Cocky. "She's a fighter, this one."

A gun cocked.

The surroundings changed. Cold, damp air rose from the dark abyss beneath them. Hailey stood alone on the bridge. In the distance, the fighting had stopped. Only the heavy beats of her heart pounded in her ears.

"Look me in the eye, Captain."

Every muscle tensed. Hailey's lungs struggled to get enough air. She knew what was coming next. Her voice was hoarse, thick with tears. "No."

"Turn around, coward."

Her body moved of its own accord. Hailey struggled, fighting the pull, but she couldn't stop it. She couldn't do anything, not even stop the tears flowing down her cheeks. "No, please…"

The other woman laughed, pointing her shotgun at Hailey's chest. "There's only one way to take down a fighter."

Hailey screamed –

– and jerked upright. Everything was black around her. For a moment, she looked around in panic, expecting to see that female Genii's face looming over her, but there was nothing. She was in her bed on Tirana. The Genii capitol was far away. It'd just been a dream. Just a dream…

Breathing heavily, Hailey stumbled quickly out of bed and crossed the short distance to the water jug they kept indoors. Her hands were shaking as she poured herself a glass of cold water, spilling most of the contents over her hot fingers.

The air in the room was cold against her clammy skin, but it woke her up fully. Hailey welcomed it. She still looked across her shoulder for that sneering, gleeful face just outside her reach.

She gulped down the water and set the glass down on the table with a long sigh. Her heart was still hammering in her chest when she turned back towards the bunk bed.

In the top bed, her bunkmate stared at her in the darkness. "Another one?"

"Go to sleep, Kath." Hailey's voice turned harsh as she started pulling on her clothes in quick, jagged motions.

"…You should talk to the colonel. This can't go on, Jenn." Kathy propped up on one elbow, her features clearly worried. She kept her voice low so as not to wake the others in their barracks. Hailey doubted there'd be any point. They all knew what was going on. They all stared at her with those damn eyes that made Hailey want to crawl deeper into her bed and stay there.

"I'm fine," Hailey said, crouching down to tie her shoelaces. She kept her eyes on her task, ignoring whatever expression she imagined Kathy was wearing at the moment. Finished, she got to her feet and picked up her jacket, her senses turning dull as a comfortable void filled her. "Get some sleep. You're on the morning shift."

"Jenn…"

Hailey ignored her and exited the cabin. Outside, the night was cold and crisp. The sky was covered in thick grey clouds just waiting to burst open with rain. Off in the distance, she could see the patrols on duty and hear the low hum of the slumbering AA railgun. None of these kept her attention for long.

Pulling her collar up against the cold, Hailey stalked off towards the mining entrance, making sure none of the patrols could see her. Every step dispelled the horrific dream – along with everything else – from her mind. In the end, she was empty.

She welcomed it.

* * *

**DAY 296**

If he chose, John could probably cut through the tension with a knife. Even in the relatively bustling hangar bay, with moving people and puddle jumpers all over, the silence that had descended around him dwarfed everything else.

On his left, he had Treya, Larrin and a platoon of Travelers. On his right, he had Radim, Massan and a platoon of Genii. It was like watching the old Cold War posters.

"So, now that you've greeted and shook hands and all… Conference room?" John stared expectantly at either party, feeling very much like a ref at a rugby match. It wasn't pleasant.

"This way, Chief Radim." Treya's voice was gracious, if not a little cool, as she gestured to the hangar bay exit. Next to her, Larrin looked like she'd rather show them the way to the _other_ hangar bay exit, which was just protected by a layer of shielding at the moment; ships were still going in and out for supplies.

"Thank you, Councillor Treya." Looking much healthier than when John had last seen him, Radim offered a polite smile. As he moved past him, however, John could see that Radim's hair seemed to have thinned out and become a little patchy. The sight was sobering. He might still be up walking, but he'd be forever marked by Rathorn's coup d'état. Radiation sickness didn't just go away like a bad cold.

With Treya and her people taking the lead, John followed behind the Genii entourage until they reached the same conference room where Sam had made their case just a month ago. John couldn't help but be impressed they reached the room without incident. The Genii weren't exactly held in high graces around here, no matter how much Radim had insisted his faction had nothing to do with the colonial tech thefts four months ago – or how many nuclear devices he offered in return for resources and cooperation.

The two groups took their places around the conference table, with John keeping to the background. After all, he was technically here just to observe and facilitate the trade negotiation as Sam's proxy. His only mission was this: _don't let them kill each other._ Otherwise, Sam might kill _him_. Though, depending on how this turned out, he might not mind a clean death.

"Shall we begin?" Once more, Treya took initiative as the hostess in that typical let's-get-to-it attitude of the Travelers. If Radim took offense to the lack of polite small talk, he hid it pretty well.

Even so, John knew this would be a long day. The only thing that kept him going, however, was the fact that whatever happened here, it'd be insignificant compared to what would happen on Atlantis.

* * *

"You drew this for me? It's beautiful, Reika. Thank you, skipper." Smiling at the little girl propped up in bed, who already found a new piece of paper to draw on, Sam brushed her fingers across the colourful lines and circles.

Reika had taken quickly to the use of different-coloured crayons in the past few weeks, her initial ignorance of those reminding Sam that Reika's upbringing had been quite different from her own. For one thing, they didn't have crayons on Kadaria. Even so, Keller had encouraged Reika to keep drawing as a way to rehabilitate muscles she hadn't used in months. Her dexterity was much improved, even if her days were primarily spent in bed.

The most recent gift looked similar to other pictures Sam had received in the past. Circles for faces, dots for eyes, curves for smiles. Yellow and dark for hair, and lines for limbs. In the corner, Reika has insisted on Sam making a contribution. Her almost perfectly round and humanised sun, wearing a large grin, stood in somewhat contrast to Reika's more jagged shapes.

"So who have you drawn this time?" Sam eyed the girl.

"Mother and father and grandfather," Reika said without pause, her eyes already on the new shapes being drawn out on blank paper. As if an afterthought, she looked up and pointed at a figure on the drawing in Sam's hands. "And you. See?"

Sam smiled. "I see. I must say, you really make me pretty. What's this, though?" She pointed to the uneven yellow triangles pointing up from the figure's head.

"A crown." Reika's eyes traced the shape. "You're a princess because Atlantis is your castle."

The simple statement made Sam chuckle. Ever since Daniel had started telling Reika fairy tales, she'd been obsessed with princesses and dragons and handsome knights. Glamour, heroics and happy endings – they were a far cry from reality, but Sam found she didn't mind. Reika's childish imagination was a breath of fresh air.

"What does that make me?" A familiar voice sounded from the doorway. Reika's head turned up and she smiled widely as Daniel stepped inside the infirmary ward, a wheelchair pushed in front of him.

"You're the one who tells the story."

"That doesn't sound very glamorous," Daniel said, parking the wheelchair next to the bed while Sam went to find something for Reika to use over her hospital gown. He frowned. "Can't I be a knight or a wizard?"

"But you don't fight."

Reika's matter-of-factly tone made Sam laugh out loud. A spare BDU jacket in hand, she turned to Daniel. "She's got you there."

Daniel rolled his eyes and looked almost tempted to stick his tongue out at her. Instead, he turned to Reika and puffed out his chest dramatically. "Well, maybe I can be the valiant driver who make sure the little princess will reach the movie on time."

Reika giggled at his antics. "Okay."

In almost perfect synch, Sam and Daniel dressed the girl in the jacket-turned-robe, and moved her from the bed to the wheelchair. As Daniel made sure Reika was seated comfortably and that the IV line to the drug dispenser was hanging free, Sam picked up the standard hospital quilt from the bed and wrapped the girl in it. Although Reika smiled at her, Sam couldn't help but feel a little sober at the realisation that she was still very small and skinny for her age. The oversized socks on her feet didn't help removing that image.

"There you go." Sam tucked Reika's feet inside the quilt and smiled at her. "All set to go. Are you excited?"

"Yes. I hope it's the one with the dragon. He's funny."

Both Daniel and Sam grinned, their eyes meeting momentarily. Ever since Private Durani had stepped forward with a very impressive children's cartoon library on her portable hard drive, those caring for the Kadarians had insisted upon showing them to the children every day after lunch. It served as a very good way of putting their minds off everything else.

 _Speaking of which…_ Sam's insides churned uncomfortably as she crouched down in front of Reika's wheelchair. Behind it, a dark shadow now crossed Daniel's previously contented face.

"I've got to go to an important meeting now, but I'll come say goodbye before I leave tonight, skipper." Sam reached out and caressed Reika's cheek with a soft smile that belied the stormy feelings contained within her at the moment. "Let me know how the movie goes, okay?"

"Okay." The little girl smiled back, and then looked up at Daniel. "Giddy-up!"

The command did its trick. Daniel and Sam both chuckled, dispelling the momentary feeling of dread. Getting up to her feet, Sam winked at Daniel. "You heard the Lady, chauffeur."

"Alright, second star on the right and straight on 'till morning." With some dramatic effect, Daniel pushed the wheelchair into action and Sam watched them leave the room with growing trepidation. Once they were gone, her hands fisted tightly and her insides grew hot.

* * *

An uneasy feeling ran down Woolsey's spine as he crossed the threshold from the laboratory next door. Despite his rather frequent visits down here in the past week or so, he never got used to the sight of the three _Sun Tzu_ survivors encased in the Ancient stasis pods. They were, however, never his true target.

"Shen."

Xiaoyi stood silently in front of the left pod, face raised to stare at the small, scrawny body of another Chinese woman within. She didn't acknowledge him. In her hand, she clutched a leather-bound book tightly, her knuckles white.

As he moved closer, Woolsey saw that she was miles away, locked in some world to which he wasn't privy. Eying the book suspiciously – this wasn't the first time he'd seen it – he stepped up to her and cleared his throat loudly.

Xiaoyi visibly startled, her eyes swinging around at him wildly. But it wasn't her panicked, haunted eyes that stunned him. It was the tears on her cheeks.

"Uh, I'm sorry." Woolsey withdrew his eyes respectfully, then went to his pocket and fished out a handkerchief. He held it out in her general direction, but it remained untouched.

After a moment, he looked back and saw Xiaoyi glare at him, her tears gone, but her cheeks flaming red instead. He awkwardly returned the handkerchief to his pocket. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to disturb you."

"What do you want?" Raising her chin defiantly, Xiaoyi moved both hands behind her back, hiding the book from his view. Noting the action and filing it away for later, Woolsey straightened his spine.

"I heard Dr Huang was willing to talk today. Did she share anything new about the circumstances that led the _Sun Tzu_ to Pegasus?"

Xiaoyi's lips thinned. "No. She talked mostly about home and where she grew up." A shadow passed Xiaoyi's eyes quicker than she could hide it. "However, it didn't last long before Dr Mackenzie had to intercede."

The implications of that made Woolsey sigh. Although they were fortunate to have an experienced psychiatrist from the SGC present, the progress made in the last seven weeks was minimal, at least when it concerned the survivors' mental health. Physically, Keller said, they were fine – with the exception of the three who'd eventually wound up in stasis pods because of debilitating health. The remaining two alternated between good days and bad days, and, lately, it'd been mostly the latter.

"We'll have to give them time," Woolsey said, one hand grasping the other in front of him, while at the same time paying close attention to Xiaoyi's response. "It can't be easy having to relive that journey…"

Xiaoyi didn't reply. No words were really necessary. The scraps of information Dr Takahashi had finally managed to decrypt from the _Sun Tzu'_ s black box a week ago was enough to give Woolsey nightmares.

The surviving crew from the alien attack on Earth had spent nearly seven months on that ship trying to cross from Milky Way to Pegasus on barely-running hyperdrives, which were presumably damaged in the alien attack. Even with extreme rationing, they'd run out of food a few weeks before they reached this galaxy. How they'd survived…he didn't want to know.

Slightly nauseated, Woolsey shifted on his feet and saw that Xiaoyi was once more lost in her world. The hand holding the leather-bound book had trailed down to her side. Holding back a frown, he cleared his throat and gained her attention.

"Perhaps we should return to your office. There are a few things I would like to go over with you before today's council meeting."

"Of course." Xiaoyi's features smoothed and her manner became all about business. She didn't even give the stasis pods behind her a second look as they left.

* * *

He found Larrin alone on the _Vestige's_ observational deck. Everyone else had adjourned to the conference room for the second part of the negotiations. Trusting Treya and Radim to handle the rest on their own, John had excused himself after lunch and gone here instead.

"Impressive sight." His voice broke the silence of the observational deck. In front of the large window at the end, Larrin looked back at him. John nodded towards the view outside as he approached her. "You've been hard at work."

Orbiting the small star in the distance was the majority of the Traveler fleet. They looked like blips on a radar; mere shadows against the yellow star backdrop. If he hadn't seen the sensor logs on the command centre earlier, he wouldn't have known there were also dozens of solar panel satellites already orbiting the star. Quite a feat given that they'd just started less than two weeks ago.

"We're efficient once we have a common goal." The words were delivered dismissively, yet John detected a note of pride in the depths of Larrin's tone. "Besides," she continued, "we're also setting up a colony on the second planet in this system. With the dyson ring, we'll have access to renewable energy, which is a step up for us. No more nuclear dependence."

"Except for nukes," John pointed out lightly.

Larrin sighed. "Yes, except for that." She suddenly shook her head in annoyance. "I don't see how you can work with those people, Sheppard. They're all backwards, ignorant idiots."

"Like Sam said, the Genii owe us." John held back a smirk. Larrin's annoyance could be amusing when not directed at him. "They might be less technologically advanced than us, but they've got the numbers and the basic resources we'll need to fight the Wraith long-term. That, and they've offered to help with the dyson ring construction."

"Even so." Larrin clenched her hands into fists. "I'd rather face a Wraith straight on than get friendly with a Genii, especially on a day-to-day basis."

"This coming from the same woman who didn't want to get friendly with Atlantis, and now look at us." Taking a step forward, John leaned against the railing stretched across the large floor-to-ceiling window. He stared at the moving ships in the distance and decided to change the topic. "Though, I still can't believe you've scrounged up most of those satellites." He glanced at her as she came to rest against the railing next to him. "Where'd you salvage them?"

"Here and there. You'd be surprised how many abandoned or dead planets carry satellites in orbit. Based on the blueprints and samples we received from Atlantis, it was a pretty standard procedure to construct additional collectors and solar panels."

"Wait." John frowned and gave her a pointed look. "Exactly _how_ many abandoned high-technological planets do you know of? We've just encountered about a handful. That's _with_ access to the Ancient database."

Larrin smirked. "Everything's got a price, Sheppard. I'm not about to give up our primary repositories just like that." She looked him up and down, trailing her tongue along the tips of her teeth, and stepped a little closer. "I might be persuaded, though."

John snorted, albeit uncomfortably. "Nice try."

Stepping out of his comfort zone, Larrin chuckled. "As if I would try anything on a taken man." The words made John shift uneasily on his feet and not meet her eyes. It didn't go unnoticed. "You're not—even after last—?"

Clearing his throat, John stared resolutely at the Traveler fleet in the distance, a mixture of feelings going through him. "We're taking it one step at a time."

Larrin grinned. "Does that mean—"

"No, we're going slow." John rolled his eyes. "Get your mind out of the gutter, Larrin."

"Oooh, touchy." The words were reminiscent of his previous visit, which put John further on edge. Larrin, however, simply winked at him. "I think it's good, Sheppard. I'm happy for you. People deserve to have someone special, especially these days."

With the last three words, there was the barest tremble in her voice that made John give her a second look. Before he could ask, however, Larrin had composed herself and put on another wide smirk. "So… Sam never mentioned why she couldn't come today."

"She had other business to attend to," John said. An uncomfortable feeling of disquiet filled his veins as he looked back at the Traveler fleet. "Council meeting. Really important."

* * *

"We've run multiple simulations on the shield system. So far, they've all been successful. However, we won't have a real idea of how well the upgraded system works unless it's combat-tested."

Standing in front of the wall-mounted screen inside the conference room, McKay showed several diagrams and level outputs to support his statements. Shen surveyed them carefully, although she wasn't proficient enough to understand them completely. Still, Dr Takahashi had confirmed that McKay's work was valid and that was enough for her.

"What's the power drain compared to earlier?" Carter's question drew Shen's attention.

While the appearance of Carter at the meeting was expected with Caldwell absent, Shen could feel her body tense up every time the woman made herself known. It had happened a few times so far, especially when it came to the latest developments in the _Sun Tzu_ issue, which they'd covered earlier. Carter had seemed very interested in whatever the survivors had revealed until now, a fact that didn't escape Shen's notice.

Was it something she would try to use against her? The question hovered uneasily at the edge of Shen's mind.

"There's a 5 % increase on a normal day, and about 20 % increase when the shield's fully activated, which would cut down the ZedPM's reserves by at least a couple of decades in the long run." McKay rolled his eyes and said, "Not that it'll make a major impact on Atlantis. She'll still be standing for at least four or five centuries with the current ZedPM."

"Thank you, Dr McKay. You've done an excellent job." Feeling the need to take back control, Shen gave him a nod and cut short any further elaboration.

She'd expected some kind of reaction from Carter or Woolsey, but the two didn't protest, nor did anyone else. They just fell into attentive silence as McKay sat back down again. Carter didn't even look at her.

That scared Shen more than anything.

Clearing her throat, she quickly busied herself with the laptop in front of her. "If there is nothing else, I suggest we move on to the next item on the agenda." Shen forced a smile that a few others – thankfully – returned, then sat forward in her chair. Her insides began to churn uncomfortably as she caught sight of the title in front of her. "Item 102/09: status of on-going medical treatments and current inventories. Miss Rey, could you introduce the topic?"

"Thank you, Miss Xiaoyi." The middle-aged redhead, who served as head of the five-month old Human Resource and Finance department, straightened in her seat and pulled up a spreadsheet on the wall-mounted screen. "Reviewing the latest budgets and inventories has shown that we've spent more than 50 % of our medical resources in just the past two months alone. Although this could be explained by extraordinary circumstances that couldn't be predicted, such as the attack on New Kadara and the arrival of the _Sun Tzu,_ it has nonetheless turned into a serious issue that we need to address."

"Dr Keller, would you please elaborate?" Shen asked, gesturing to the young doctor on the other side of the table.

"Yes." Keller licked her lips and stared nervously at everyone seated around the conference table. "Um, although we've been able to supplement our original inventory over the past months with medicinal herbs from our Pegasus allies, the supplies we received in the SGC evacuation are running low, especially when it comes to targeted drug delivery, specialised medication and non-reusable equipment. We're researching ways of either replicating pharmaceuticals from Earth or making them from scratch, but so far we're coming up a little short."

"Have you found anything helpful in the Ancient database?" Once more, Carter asked the questions. Shen tensed.

"We've found some alternatives that we can use, but we're still lacking ingredients to create even a fraction of the recipes in there." Keller sighed, wringing her hands slightly; she looked pained. "…If we can't replenish our rare medical supplies soon, I will have no choice but to start stepping down treatment in order to save some of those items for the future. We don't know what might happen and we need to be prepared. Still, I'd rather avoid that, so I'm open to options."

"There could be some device in this city that we haven't discovered yet." The suggestion came from McKay, who looked extremely worried at this news. "We've only covered, what, 20-30 % of what this city has to offer? There are still a number of devices we could look into more closely—"

"There is no time for that." The words slipped out of Shen's mouth before she realised what she'd said. Confused looks turned to her, with the exception of Woolsey and Carter, who both narrowed their eyes. Eager to redirect, she took a breath and said, "This has once more become a matter of survival for us. There have been – and still are – many patients in Dr Keller's care that require specialised treatment. That means experimental and rare medication. If we go through our reserves at the same pace as of the past two months…we'll run out within weeks. Isn't that right, Doctor?"

"Uh, yes." Keller still looked slightly confused.

Shen straightened her posture and summoned every sliver of conviction into her voice. "There have been primarily two groups of patients with extraordinary needs. The three _Sun Tzu_ crew members that were previously in medical comas have already been moved into stasis pods, thereby saving us precious supplies. That leaves the second group of patients: the Kadarian children. Miss Rey, could you show us the list of supplies currently required in their treatment?"

Rey complied quickly, having anticipated her request. The list sprung up on the wall-mounted screen, automatically scrolling down to the bottom line.

"Strong pain reliefs, experimental drugs, nutritional IVs – these are just a tip of the iceberg." Shen saw some of the council members were nodding contemplatively at her words. That boosted her confidence somewhat. "Dr Keller, how much time do you believe remains of the children's treatment and rehabilitation?"

"Uh…" Keller looked wide-eyed at her. "At least three or four weeks. Some are progressing faster than others, though." She narrowed her eyes slightly. "But we have no way of knowing exactly what the long-term consequences of the experimental treatment will be. They might go into remission once we take them off the drugs."

To the side, Shen saw Carter's expression tighten. She could see the muscles work in the colonel's jaw and knew from experience that at any moment, there would be an outburst.

"However, we've taken all of this into account," Keller said, her voice heating up a little. "Once we get a breakthrough in our research, we'll be able to make our own medication from original samples. We're also making new nutritional IVs from the old ones, and—"

"Doctor, while I admire your optimism, this issue will only be resolved _if_ your research works. Do you have a deadline on when that might occur?"

"Of course not." Keller looked outraged. "You can't _force_ medical science. We don't get immediate results like fixing an electrical circuit and a computer code. We have to go through trial and error, which could take—"

"So your answer is 'no'," Shen stated, her insides clenching. She understood Keller –even sympathised with her – but this was their reality. Time was running out. "I'm sorry, Doctor, but you said it yourself: if we cannot replenish our medical supplies soon, we will run out in a few weeks at our current consumption level." She sighed. "It seems to me that our only option is to revise the treatment plan for the Kadarian children who, currently, constitute the majority of our medical expenditure."

"…What do you suggest?" Carter's question was more like a statement, her tone deadly calm – like she knew that Shen had something in mind. The thought made her uncomfortable. She didn't like being predictable. Too dangerous. She also didn't like the implication in Carter's tone, or the delivery. An emotional outbreak would've been better.

"The Tikwa Administration has offered their services. They are willing to accept the Kadarian children as humanitarian refugees."

* * *

Sam wanted to laugh in derision at Xiaoyi's solution to what she probably called 'the Kadarian issue'. Her hands clenched tightly, hidden from view underneath the tabletop, while she forced herself to stay calm.

Getting emotional in this council would get her nowhere. The past had taught her that. She wasn't sure who'd support her anymore. Even Woolsey was an uncertainty these days, considering the amount of influence he'd seemingly garnered after returning from Tirana.

From what educated rumours told her, he was now the number two on Atlantis, and he'd never outspokenly disagreed with Xiaoyi since the time he'd been booted off to Tirana. Whether that was all a game or a genuine alliance with Xiaoyi, Sam didn't know and she wasn't sure she wanted to find out. She'd promised John not to get swept up in politics again.

But listening to Xiaoyi talk about finances in a matter that was clearly humanitarian… It pissed her off.

* * *

"Welcome back, Colonel. Have a nice trip?"

Still combat-clad, John suppressed a wince as he stepped up to the operations console Chuck was seated behind. "Nice enough." Seeing Chuck's slightly arched eyebrow, John realised he hadn't suppressed the wince entirely. "Torren threw up all over my brand new pants. Had to request new ones." He gestured to the dark spots on his standard black uniform pants, hoping Chuck wouldn't pick up the faint scent of engine grease from when Larrin took him on tour of the satellite constructions. The half-dignified snort told him he'd succeeded.

"Sorry to hear that, sir." Chuck seemed to struggle to keep down his continued amusement. "Children, right?"

"Yeah…" John sobered, his eyes finding the closed conference room doors across the gate room. The table outside containing drinks and slices of fruit was untouched. He wondered if that was a good or a bad thing, given that the meeting had started nearly two hours ago.

"They're scheduled for a break soon," Chuck said, giving John a knowing look. "Want me to notify you, or do you wish to wait?"

Shifting uneasily on his feet, John considered it. If he left now, he might catch Reika and Jackson down at the mess hall with the other children. Sam could always tell him the news in case they didn't travel around first – they had a tendency to do just that. But if he stayed, he might—

The decision was made for him. Across the gate room, the conference room doors suddenly opened and people started filing outside to the drinks and fruit table in groups of three and four. John tensed.

In one of the groups, someone laughed loudly. Others smiled. They parted and John saw Xiaoyi behind them, smiling too as she talked inaudibly to them. More smiles and laughs.

Sam was nowhere to be seen.

"Shit…" The curse slipped past his lips before John could think twice. He ignored Chuck, who tensed next to him, and began to walk towards the conference room.

Then he stopped. Sam appeared in the open doorway, her expression dark and edgy. It took a moment before she noticed him. Eyes locked, she shook her head twice and moved slowly towards the drinks table.

It wasn't much, but John relaxed by a fraction. That'd been their sign when no decision had been made yet. There was still time.

And judging by the looks she sent Xiaoyi's back, Sam had a plan.

Suppressing a smile, John glanced back at Chuck. "You can let me know when they're done for the day."

* * *

"Yes, I have a report on that in my office. Excuse me for a moment."

The moment Xiaoyi broke away from her group of cohorts, Sam seized her opportunity. She walked unhurriedly through the OpCentre in Xiaoyi's wake, who left the door open as she went to search for the aforementioned report.

Sam stepped inside the office and calmly closed the wooden door. The _click_ gained Xiaoyi's startled attention.

"Colonel Carter—"

"You know _damn_ well that the Tikwee are nowhere near as medically advanced as us." In the privacy of Xiaoyi's office, Sam's voice turned harsh and all pretence of previous compliance was gone. She chose her words carefully. "If you send the children there and they go into remission, they're as good as dead. Are you really so willing to let more people die? Hasn't there been enough?"

Sinking into her seat behind the desk, Xiaoyi's eyes glinted. She took a moment before she answered, giving herself enough time to adjust and let that smooth mask cover her expression. "As you yourself stated some time ago, Colonel Carter, we're at war. Rationing is a necessary evil and casualties are to be expected."

The ridiculousness of being faced with her own words as an opposing argument made Sam snort. "In that case, I'll bring up the Geneva Conventions. Those are still valid, right?" Before Xiaoyi could respond, Sam pushed on, crossing her arms and pulling up to her full height. "Fourth Convention: We have an obligation to render aid and protect civilians during wartime. If we refuse, we wilfully cause great suffering to eight innocent children's physical and mental health, which would be considered a grave breach of the treaty and punishable as a war crime."

Eyes widening slightly, Xiaoyi didn't respond.

"Or maybe I should remind you of the Declaration of the Rights of the Child? Since this is technically an international base, we'll have to follow the principles of the UN. Right?"

Sam narrowed her eyes, her jaw tightening. "Every child has the right to survival, to develop to its fullest, and to be protected from harmful influences, abuse and exploitation. Were you aware that the Tikwa Administration uses orphans in mining on Tikwa 2, or that many of the children sent to certain orphanages on Tiwka disappear without a trace?"

Again, Xiaoyi didn't respond. Sam thought she might detect a trace of shock in the woman's eyes, and her thanks went back to Master Togar's personal insight, when she learned of today's meeting agenda, and Daniel, who knew more about international laws and conventions than she did.

Sam leaned down on top of Xiaoyi's desk. "Atlantis is still legally an international Earth base. If you send those children away now, you're breaking treaties _all_ our nations have signed." She paused and lowered her voice, her anger dialling back down to a dangerous simmer as she prepared to leave. "Take it from me: it won't go unnoticed."

_I won't let it._

The threat was left unspoken in the air, and – for some reason – Sam knew she'd won.

* * *

"If I may say so, Colonel… Well played."

The low-voiced comment had barely time to register in Sam's mind before the transporter doors closed and Woolsey flashed away to his destination. She turned, startled, and stared in shock at the closed doors.

Compared to the courteous small talk between them since they'd left the council meeting, Woolsey's last comment sounded much more…significant. It made her uneasy. Paranoid. Wondering if she'd just painted a bull's-eye on herself again.

Then she recalled O'Neill's words about the man and his non-intrusive and supporting behaviour on Tirana during his stay there. And she started wondering if maybe his words held another meaning entirely…

"Sam!" A young girl's voice broke through her mind.

Blinking, Sam turned to see Reika being pushed down the corridor with one hand by John, who held the rolling IV stand in the other. They were coming from the direction of the small mess hall on this level.

"Hey, skipper." Sam's face immediately transformed into a smile as the two of them came closer, the recent turn of events coming to mind once more. She reached down and ruffled Reika's hair. "Where've you been off to?"

"We're on a quest." Reika smiled, the blanket wrapped tightly around her. She seemed to be shivering a little, making Sam notice the slightly cool temperature. The weather outside was changing, affecting the atmosphere inside. "John's found a treasure."

"Oh really?" Smirking, Sam met John's eyes. He was dressed in his standard black BDU, most likely recently returned from his mission to the Travelers. "What kind of treasure?"

"It's a secret." John's eyes twinkled. He then pushed the IV stand towards her. "Something magical."

"It would only show up when I'd eaten my food!" Reika sounded both miffed and excited.

"Now I'm wondering if I should be worried or not." Grabbing the IV stand, Sam walked alongside John as he pushed the wheelchair forward. "It's not something furry, is it?"

"My lips are sealed." A mysterious, but very familiar, smirk crossed John's face. There was a different spring in his steps that told Sam the good news had travelled fast, which calmed her. She didn't want to bring up the issue in front of Reika, who she'd tried to shield from the politics and bureaucracy ever since she'd regained consciousness.

They walked through the infirmary corridors until they reached Reika's room, where the temperature was thankfully warmer. While Sam helped Reika get settled in bed, John went to the corner of the room and picked up something from the shadows.

"Ready?"

"Yes!" Reika almost shouted impatiently, both giddy and a bit tired-looking at the same time. Two trips – one to the movie and one to eat dinner – in one day were apparently enough to wear her out, but it was nevertheless a vast improvement from just last week.

"Alright. You better close your eyes, kiddo." While Reika squeezed her eyes shut, John turned back towards them with a tray in hand. Sam's own eyes widened once she saw its contents.

' _How?'_ she mouthed at John, who just shrugged as he put down the tray on Reika's bedside table.

"Open them," John told Reika, who complied dutifully.

For a whole second, Reika's eyes were wide…until they scrunched up in confusion. "What is it?"

Sam burst out laughing at the momentary disappointment on John's face. John recovered quickly, however, and held up one of the three glasses he'd brought with a smile in Sam's direction. "This, kiddo, is Sam's favourite food. It's something rare and magical called Jell-O." He scooped up a piece of the blue jelly, still grinning. "And today you both deserve it."

"Because we're princesses?"

John snorted, then sent Sam a teasing wink that promised her she'd never hear the end of it. "Yeah, because you're princesses."

* * *

The hallways were dimmer and colder this evening. In the windows spread out at specific intervals, Woolsey could see another storm brewing outside the city. Dark clouds were gathering. Occasionally, there was even the flash of lightening. If he didn't know better, he'd say it responded to his mood. Whatever hint of satisfaction he'd felt after the council meeting was gone now. In its place was trepidation.

Woolsey came to a halt outside an open doorway. Light streamed out from within along with sounds of people. Not too many. Not enough to arouse his curiosity under ordinary circumstances.

Except these weren't ordinary circumstances. At least, he didn't think so. There were too many odd things happening; odd in the way that they differed from before and Woolsey's instinct always told him to pay attention to changes, even those small and seemingly insignificant.

Like the recent stockpiling and off-world trading missions, the humanitarian help extended to various allies, the increasing number of meetings with the Tikwa Administration…

While he was happy to see Xiaoyi become more involved in Pegasus, Woolsey couldn't shake off a feeling that'd grown more persistent in the past few months and that'd eventually led him here.

Collecting himself, Woolsey straightened and strode into the room with a purpose. No one noticed him immediately, giving him time to look around. The room looked like a standard science lab, with a mix of Ancient and Earth technology. It wasn't entirely what he'd expected, but he pushed the feeling of uncertainty away once he spotted his target.

Dr Takahashi sat at what seemed to be his workstation, completely immersed in a computer in front of him. All around him were wires, boxes, devices and more computers.

All that faded to the background when Woolsey spotted the image on Takahashi's computer screen: the schematic of a zero point module. Next to it was a window containing what seemed to be very complex code.

And on the table next to the computer was a briefcase emblazoned with the Tikwa Administration logo: something small and seemingly insignificant.

"Mr Woolsey?" One of the other scientists addressed him from behind.

Takahashi seemed to jump in his seat. He swivelled around quickly; the computer screen and the briefcase disappeared behind his back.

Unsettled, Woolsey cleared his throat and initiated his cover story. "Excuse me for not announcing myself. I dropped by to have a word with you, Dr Takahashi, if you wouldn't mind. I was told that I could find you here."

The Japanese man looked startled for a moment, then seemed to recover. "Of course, Mr Woolsey. Just one moment."

With more calm now than before, Takahashi turned back to his computer and hit a few keys on the keyboard. The screen faded to black, covering the image of the ZPM schematic and the complex computer code. The briefcase was left alone. It was already closed.

Woolsey followed his every step, the feeling in his stomach growing more persistent than ever.

* * *

"… Be extremely subtle, even to the point of formlessness. Be extremely mysterious, even to the point of soundlessness…"

Leaning against the doorframe, Sam smiled softly at the sight of John stretched out next to a sleeping Reika, reading out loud from his copy of _The Art of War_. His voice was low and soothing. The kind that he'd reserved sometimes for Sam in the dark of night when they'd just lain in bed and talked. The kind that showed he cared.

Peering down at Reika, John smiled and brushed a piece of hair away from her face. She didn't stir. "…and they lived happily ever after."

Grinning, Sam pushed off the doorframe and let the door close automatically behind her. "I'm pretty sure that isn't the original ending Sun Tzu had in mind."

"Just keeping it in her world." John smirked and closed the book, but didn't move from his spot. He seemed completely at ease, which made Sam happy. It'd been so long since she'd seen him like that on a regular basis. Reika had a magical healing effect of her own, apparently.

Which only made leaving her harder and harder, especially now that they'd gotten Xiaoyi's written reassurance that Reika wouldn't be relocated until Keller was absolutely sure that she wouldn't go into remission. And then she and the other children would be relocated to Pegasus settlers that had a familiar rural lifestyle to the Kadarians – not to Tikwa – unless someone else stepped forward to claim them.

Sam sighed. "I hate to ruin the moment…"

"…but you wanna know how it went with our _friends_ before you leave," John finished. His expression grew more serious and his arm tightened slightly upon the pillow above Reika's head.

"Yeah."

John blew a breath and kept his voice low. "Well, they're progressing, if anything. The Traveler ships have finally been equipped with Genii nuclear warheads. No one's killed each other. Radim and Treya even reached an agreement on the division of labour on the dyson ring once Radim signed a statement that his faction had nothing to do with the Genii thefts four months ago. And Larrin apologised for tying me up for blood samples." He smirked humourlessly. "Turns out they just wanted to be able to create better interfaces for the Ancient tech. The ATA gene therapy's given most of them terrible headaches."

Sam hid a smile. "Still, she could've asked nicely."

"Second that." John rolled his eyes, then met her eyes seriously again. "Bad news is that the estimated deadline on the dyson ring is two weeks. At the earliest. Even with the Genii chipping in."

"Damn."

"Yeah."

Running a hand through her long bangs, Sam sighed. "Well, I guess it's the best I could hope for given that they only started a few weeks ago. But I have a really bad feeling about this. It's been too quiet too long. _Daedalus_ should have found the superhive by now."

John hummed in response. "It's a big galaxy. For all we know, the superhive's developed superior sensors and kept track of _Daedalus,_ making sure they've been out of reach all the time. Anything's possible for them with enough power, right?"

"That's the general assumption, at least." Pacing a few steps, Sam stopped and grabbed hold of the bottom of Reika's bed. "But that'd mean they'd either burn through ZPMs very quickly or expand their complement to account for the power drain. I don't know which scares me most."

"Wouldn't mind learning where they'd gotten so many ZPMs in the first place," John said lowly. "We'd be stronger with a bigger arsenal of our own."

"Goes without saying." Sam smiled. He sounded almost like Ronon – bigger and meaner was better, according to him. "But so far we're safer by staying hidden."

"Yeah, I know." Sighing, John looked down at Reika again and brushed his thumb across her mop of pale hair.

For a moment, none of them said anything, then Sam reached down to rub Reika's leg, careful not to wake the girl. "Well, I better go. Hailey's waiting for me. We're taking another look at the weapons component of the Ascalon before Larrin comes to pick it up and bring it to the dyson ring."

"All right." John smiled, still seated comfortably in the bed next to Reika. "Tell her 'hi' from me. And remember to get some sleep, too. Both of you. You look like you need it."

Sam rolled her eyes and made a mock salute. "Yes, sir."

* * *

There was something comforting about the feel of metal underneath her skin – the yielding screws tightening under her pressure, the sense of accomplishment when she sat back and saw the finished product, something _she_ had done. It kept the other things at bay. It was easier to get lost in the work. She didn't have to _feel_ anything.

Hailey swept the back of her hand across her sweaty brow, the temperature in the Colonel's cabin high due to the simmering fireplace. From outside, she heard the low hum of the naquadah generator that powered the Colonel's computer on her desk – and the other electrical devices in the mine camp. It grounded her, and gave her something to listen to as she worked.

Shifting in her seat on the floor, Hailey reached for the tablet computer lying nearby and hooked it up to the wires attached to the square device she'd been working on. As soon as the power came on, she initiated the code she and Colonel Carter had put together and watched the numbers and letters scroll down the screen. It stopped at the last line with a question: INITIATE?

Hailey pressed the Y button and looked up as the square device came to life. The image on her screen changed, displaying the stargate satellite currently in orbit above Tirana.

It was similar in many ways to the SGC's dialling computer, except it provided a 3D image of the satellite as it moved around. A small camera had been attached to the satellite as well, providing Hailey with a square window in the corner where she could see the planet's dark and glittering landscape – it was a cloudless night. The video wasn't meant for targeting, though, as a separate programme was currently crunching the necessary numbers.

Once the area around the satellite had been mapped out, a separate grid image appeared on Hailey's screen. It immediately picked up the debris _Daedalus_ had left in orbit for target practice. Inputting their position, Hailey calculated a new vector for the stargate satellite and engaged the thrusters.

The satellite performed exemplary. There were no hitches, no malfunctioning components, and no error messages. All their testing – and Hailey's work on the square device, which was a combined transmitter and control computer – had led them to this.

She supposed she should smile, but nothing came to her. Instead, Hailey made a few more tries before she powered everything down, found something minor that could become an issue given certain circumstances, and set to work on fixing it.

She didn't even notice when Carter showed up or remembered what they talked about; she probably just smiled and said the right things. Then at one point, she had left the cabin and gone back to her bed.

Back to her nightmares.

* * *

Shen peered outside at the OpCentre where the graveyard shift sat quietly and alone in the dimness. Shang was in charge, but even so, she closed the shades and turned back to the other occupant of her office. "Did he show any interest in your work?"

"Nothing that seemed a cause for concern, Madam Xiaoyi," Takahashi said. He stood stoically and straight-backed next to her desk, his chin raised. In the scarce light of her desk lamp, his features were half covered in shadows and his eyes glittered. "I believe he might have seen my computer screen at the time, but he asked no questions about it. Unless he is personally familiar with computer code or has a photographic memory to relay what he saw to another scientist, I do not think he knows what I was doing."

Shen bit the inside of her lip as she retraced her steps to the desk and leaned on the edge. "I would rather be sure. Do you still monitor his personal computer?"

"Yes. There has been nothing suspicious to report." Takahashi paused. "Do you wish for me to delve deeper? It would require a more direct intrusion into his computer than a mere virus."

After a moment's pause, Shen shook her head. "No. It is too dangerous. Even if he doesn't know anything yet, he _is_ paying attention."

He had ever since he returned from Tirana, maybe even before then. Wherever she went, she felt like his eyes followed. If not his own, then someone working with him. This place had eyes and ears all over. Shen wished she'd been able to control all of them.

A wave of tiredness washed over her. Shen ignored it, pushing off the desk to pace a few steps and keep herself moving. A familiar weight of stone fell into the pit of her stomach as she forced herself to push the suspicions aside for the moment; there was nothing she could do about it. Yet.

"How is your work progressing besides unexpected visits?" Turning back to Takahashi, Shen crossed her arms and stopped pacing.

"Very well. Our calculations are almost done. The viruses have been spread in the system. No one has detected them so far." Takahashi subtly pushed his chest out and kept his eyes in front out of respect. Shen appreciated the gesture.

"Good. And your search of Atlantis?"

Takahashi's face fell for a split second, his head bobbing forward as if going into a bow. "I am sorry to say that it is still fruitless. She's hidden the ZPM very well."

Anger flushing up inside her, Shen turned back to her desk and regarded the jade figurine – her last Earthly possession from her parents – and the leather-bound diary on the desktop. Her lips curled into a grimace. "Keep at it. We're running out of time."

"Hai, Madam Xiaoyi."

With a curt but deep bow, Takahashi left through the office backdoor. Shen remained by her desk for a long while, her eyes fixed upon the diary.

* * *

In the darkness of his living quarters, Woolsey took off his glasses and rubbed the ridge of his nose in frustration.

His database search had come up empty. Again. No matter what kind of keyword he tried or how much digging he did, he just couldn't find it. The Ancient entry on Aleira was gone. If he hadn't read it two weeks ago with his own two eyes, he would've brushed this off as a piece of his imagination, but to find no trace of it at all…?

Woolsey rubbed his tired eyes, his vision blurry. This was becoming too complex. So far, all he had was many separate oddities – small things and whispers – but none that'd gotten him any closer to the bigger picture. In reality, it meant he had nothing.

He put on his glasses again. The text on the computer screen became visible: NO RESULTS.

With a decisive punch of a button, Woolsey closed the search window and disconnected from the Ancient database. He ran a program to erase his digital footprints – something he'd acquired through one of his sources among the scientists once he'd learned he'd been bugged, presumably by Xiaoyi's people – and then sat back in his chair, fingers stapled together beneath his chin.

The time showed 01:12. Time to go to bed on a normal night, but this one – as well as every day of the past few weeks – had been anything but normal. Too many new questions had arisen. Too many puzzles to solve; including whatever had been in that briefcase in Takahashi's lab.

Woolsey turned to stare out through the open window at the now calm, glittering ocean in-between the city's towers. Rising up in the distance, the control tower stood seemingly alone yet powerful among all the other towers. Lights were on in many of the windows from top 'till bottom. Other restless souls like him, most likely.

"What's your agenda, Shen? And why is the Administration involved?"

The whispered questions went unanswered, like the many others on Woolsey's mind. It would be yet another restless night.

* * *

**DAY 301**

Tall, broad-shouldered and lean, the Genii Commander had dark narrow eyes that were set deep in his face. His once neatly trimmed beard was slightly ragged from a life on the run, but his Genii uniform was impeccable. He wore a large smile.

"Perhaps you need a motivator."

"No…please…" Her voice broke, her joints and limbs aching painfully, and she had to remind herself to breathe through the pain. The air was stale and metallic, permeating her senses, making her nauseous. "You promised."

He moved from the shadows into a single stream of light that shone from a lamp above. "I know. You should've listened to your peers. Don't trust a Genii."

She started crying, the tears running freely down her red, hot skin. Swift images flashed through her mind. Her children tied down to chairs and gagged, but otherwise unharmed – so far. Her husband dead on the floor in front of them.

They'd been stolen away in the night as punishment; she hadn't come to him quickly enough. All because she'd hoped the Genii civil war had sent him running for good, so that she wouldn't have to go through with her part of their arrangement.

"Now, try again." Rathorn stopped in front of her, gently slapping a leather belt in his palm. "You wouldn't want my comrade to take over, would you?"

She whimpered, shivers running down her spine as a long-nailed finger trailed up her naked arm at Rathorn's words. Cold, clammy hands came to rest on her neck. She could feel the protrusion in the Wraith's feeding hand. She cried harder.

"I—I— _no, please._ "

"Come now, Envoy Ypresa." The Wraith's raspy voice sounded close to her ear, its breath cold and alien. It chuckled mirthfully, as if this was just a game. "One final time. Where is Atlantis?"

* * *

**Next:** "It's time."


	24. DAY 305-308 (Part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "At long last, it is time."

_**** _

 

* * *

**TWENTY-THREE, PART ONE | "It's time."**

_Prompt: A time to pluck up that which was planted_

_Music:_ Robin Hood _soundtrack, by Marc Streitenfeld_

* * *

**DAY 308**

There was a quiet hum coming from the stasis pods. Barely perceptible. If you stood quiet for long enough with no interruptions, with your breath calm and steady…you could hear it: the sound of life. The sound of hope.

Shen stared at the frozen woman within the left pod. It was the same who had reached out to her that day in the infirmary; the day James had killed himself. Several fingers and a leg were missing, and despite the weeks of healing pre-stasis, the woman's skin was patched, wrinkled and covered in bandages where she'd suffered the most severe electrical burns.

Slowly, Shen raised her hand and touched the glass. She'd expected it to be cool, but it was warm. Comforting. She brushed her hand across the frozen hand within.

She waited for a heartbeat. Her insides stormed, but she ignored it. There was no time to look back, to regret. The only path left was forward.

Then, with her other hand, she reached for her radio earpiece. "Dr Takahashi."

" _Hai, Madam Xiaoyi."_

"It's time. Initiate the plan."

* * *

**Three days earlier…**

**DAY 305**

"Something's up with these Wraith cullings we keep hearing about, Cap'n. Gotta be bad. I just know it."

The familiar voice drifted out from the infirmary's physical training gym, making Sam slow down to a crawl. Gripping one of Reika's most recent drawings a little more tightly, she stopped and peered inside the doorway.

Lying on his back on the workout bench, Sergeant Ramirez gritted his teeth and lifted his recovering leg, the muscles straining against the leather cushion. Next to him, Captain Matthews sat crouched, paying close attention to his repetitions. It was a common sight these days as Sam had seen it every time she came to visit Reika.

"Carter said it's the civil war. The other factions are stepping up the ante." Despite being the only two people in the gym Matthews lowered her voice so that it was barely audible. "Probably going to attack the superhive at some point and they're just preparing themselves for the battle."

"So… Fourth or fifth time's gotta be the charm, right? No way they'll lose again?"

Matthews snorted in response, then put her hand on Ramirez's leg. "That's ten, now pause. You don't wanna pull your muscle again."

As Ramirez sat up and accepted the water bottle Matthews handed him, Sam held back a sigh. The news about the increased Wraith cullings had reached Atlantis a few days ago through an update from the _Daedalus_ , who was coming back from her month-long patrol of the Pegasus galaxy.

While their search for the superhive had been relatively eventless, apart from some minor run-ins with other Wraith factions, to Sam the _Daedalus'_ return wasn't a moment too soon. She was tired of trying _not_ to lock horns with Xiaoyi and her people at the weekly council meetings.

All she wanted to do right now was follow through on that promise she'd given Hailey on taking a spa day off-world. Judging by the dark circles that'd started to form under Hailey's eyes and her slightly thinner appearance, she needed it. They both did.

Inside the gym, Ramirez had started his set of repetitions again, with Matthews spotting and supporting him. The bond between them made Sam smile, as did Ramirez's determination to get back on his feet. She could identify with that urge.

Still holding Reika's drawing in her hand, she continued down the dim and quiet hallway to turn in for the night.

* * *

The hallways on the East pier seemed endless. Three times Shen had had to call up to Shang in the OpCentre to make sure she was on the right track. Two of those times she had to retrace her steps and start over again at an intersection where she'd taken the wrong turn.

When she finally rounded a corner and spotted Takahashi at the end she sighed in both relief and frustration. "Perhaps next time you could meet me at the transporter, Doctor."

Takahashi bowed quickly. "I apologise, Madam Xiaoyi. Next time, I certainly will."

Shen eyed the Japanese scientist critically, then their surroundings. The hallway looked like any other. Nothing special. "So, where is it?"

"It is quite brilliant," Takahashi said, smiling all of a sudden. "At first, I could not understand how it would not show on sensors, but then…"

"Doctor, it is quite late and I have an early meeting tomorrow," Shen said pointedly, cutting his excitement in half.

"Of course." Again, Takahashi bowed, taking her reaction in his stride. He held out his hand. "If you could follow me… and be ready to act quickly."

He strode quickly over to a set of three lights on the wall, and then touched them in a particular sequence. A harmonic resonance sounded in the hallway. Before Shen could blink, he stepped straight through the wall at the end and disappeared.

Shocked, Shen quickly pulled herself together and headed for the wall too. There was an odd sensation in her body as she went through the wall – reminding her slightly of the event horizon of a stargate – and next she was standing on the other side in a dimmed laboratory.

Screens and consoles lit in blue, green and red provided the only light, but Shen could see things quite clearly. Stacks upon stacks with containers were crammed in between the consoles, all marked with the SGC logo. Her lips parted in disbelief.

"They're sealed," Takahashi said. He stood next to one of the stacks and looked around. "I haven't been able to open them yet."

Shen touched the nearest console but it didn't respond to her touch. Apart from the illumination it appeared to be powered down – either by design or by coincidence. Still, there was a sense of familiarity about this place that she couldn't quite place. "What kind of room is this?"

"An Ancient's lab. Janus. Apparently he conducted secret and illegal experiments here." Takahashi paused. "That is what the mission reports say, at least. Dr McKay and Dr Jackson discovered this lab last year during the Attero Device incident."

And just like that, the dots connected. "I remember that. The lab was kept open afterwards to study what was in here." Turning narrowed eyes back to the SGC containers, Shen's lips thinned. "Until Colonel Carter shut it down due to apparent damages sustained in the first attacks by the superhive."

"An ingenious idea." In the dimness, Takahashi smiled again. "This laboratory doesn't show up on the sensors. I had to create a focused subspace sensor that could cut through any shielding—"

"You've done well, Doctor." Tapping her foot lightly, Shen peered around more carefully, taking in the fact that there were more than twenty containers in here. Whatever was inside them was apparently something Carter felt the need to hide away. That, however, would have to wait for another time. They were on a different mission now. "Where is it?"

"Right here." Taking one step back, Takahashi revealed a small container standing on top of a larger one. He picked it up and held it out for her.

Shen marched over to him and unfastened the seals on the container, which were simply old-fashioned clasps instead of a code lock. The lid opened and her lips curled into a smirk. Closing it again, she gave Takahashi a pleased look.

"You may begin the preparations."

* * *

**DAY 307**

"Sorry for the wait, Sergeant." Dr Keller strode past the privacy screen and closed it behind her. She put down her tablet computer on a nearby table and turned towards him with a smile. "Barely even nine in the morning and we've got our hands full."

"No worries, Doc." Seated on the edge of the examination bed in nothing but a hospital gown, Ramirez managed a small smirk. There was laughter in the air – innocent, civilised laughter – from the Kadarian children being examined in the adjoining ward.

"So, big day today." Keller reached for the antibacterial gel dispenser attached to the wall and rubbed her hands thoroughly before putting on a pair of latex gloves. Turning, she gestured towards his legs dangling over the edge of the bed. "Ready to check out the latest results of your hard work?"

Ramirez forced himself to shrug. "Estoy más preparado que nunca."

_I'm as ready as I'll ever be._

Uneasy, he shifted his weight sideways and swung his naked legs up on the examination bed, suppressing a wince as he did so.

"Bueno." Stepping closer, Keller leaned down and began to examine his thigh where he'd been injured by that "Wraith" beast or whatever the Genii claimed it was. "The scar tissue looks much better." She lightly picked up his leg and proceeded to bend it slightly at the knee. "How does that feel?"

He gritted his teeth. "Fine. Just like normal."

Keller just hummed and continued with her checks; each designed to catalogue his muscular and neural responses. All the while, Ramirez told himself to keep breathing and ignore the itches, pulls and stretches that threatened to send spasms up and down his leg.

"Okay, it looks pretty good." Putting down his leg, Keller stepped back and pulled off her latex gloves. Ramirez relaxed and began to smile… "I want to run you through the medical scanner, just to be sure though."

He froze. It felt as if a stone fell into the pit of his stomach. "Is that really necessary, Doc?"

"It's a piece of very advanced equipment and it'll pick up things that I won't be able to with this type of examination. Nothing to be afraid of." She gave him what was surely meant to be a reassuring smile and then pushed aside the privacy screen to step through. "Just keep still, sergeant."

Just like that, Ramirez was alone and he became acutely aware of the rectangular scanner hovering a few feet above his head. His stomach twisted uncomfortably.

Time seemed to slow down to a crawl as the device powered up. As his eyes closed tightly, he heard his _abuela_ 's soft voice drift out of the darkness to calm him with one of her Catholic prayers of healing, reminding him of dark, stuffy rooms in LA and the cool breeze of the AC.

_Padre todopoderoso y lleno de misericordia, por el poder que me concede tu Palabra, expulsa de mí toda enfermedad…_

After two runs the hum of the machine quietened and his eyes fluttered open. Feeling suddenly nauseous, he sat up and rubbed his face. He sat alone for what seemed like an eternity before Keller came back.

When she did, the answer was in her face and Ramirez felt like he'd been punched in the gut with a puddle jumper.

"No…"

"According to the scans the muscles and nerves in your thigh have improved by about 70 %," Keller said quietly, closing the privacy screen behind her. "But it's not enough, sergeant. I'm sorry."

"What're you saying, Doc?" The words came out with difficulty, as the air seemed to be stuck in his throat. He couldn't believe it. He'd logged more than a hundred hours in the gym for the past two months. He'd done exactly what the physical trainer said, maybe even more…

"I cannot clear you for duty." Her expression soft, Keller reached out and put a hand on his shoulder. Ramirez quickly shrugged it off and slid off the bed, shaking his head.

"There's gotta be something you can do, Doc. You can't put me on the bench. I feel _fine!_ " He began to pace, ignoring the spasms that threatened to act up again whenever he put his foot down at an adverse angle. "I've done everything you said. I can't… I _can't_ be…"

"I'm sorry, Miguel. I wish there was something else we could do." Keeping a respectful distance, Keller sighed. "We both knew this was a long shot. Your muscles and nerves were just too badly damaged. The fact that you've even regained 70 % function…"

"No," Ramirez said immediately, a heat churning in his stomach. He marched into her personal space, towering almost a head over her. "It's not good enough, Doc. It's _not_ good enough!"

* * *

Sam smiled as her fingers ran across the keyboard, watching as the white numbers and letters popped up on the black computer window.

Although the program wasn't anything sophisticated, just a simple energy output calculation for the dyson ring, this was the type of work she enjoyed most: programming events and causalities to make something happen based on a set of predetermined factors.

There was an undeniable logic and order in it, and it reminded her that some things were simple. Event A leads to event B, which in turn might lead to either event C, D or E based on the set of variables. As long as you knew of or could reasonably predict the variables, you could see how it would turn out.

_Now, if only you could apply this to human behaviour—_

Sam startled at the sudden, loud banging on the cabin door.

"Colonel!" The voice belonged to Reese Matthews. The enjoyment Sam had felt moments ago disappeared abruptly. The captain was on the gate security shift and she wouldn't have come here directly unless it was important.

Pushing her chair back, Sam leaped to her feet and crossed the space between her desk and the cabin door. Matthews stood right outside, holding the hood of her raincoat up against the gusts of wind and rain that'd hit Tirana in the early morning. Just a few steps behind her, looking decidedly on edge in a borrowed SGC raincoat, was Larrin.

"What's happened?" Dismissing Matthews with a wave, Sam gestured Larrin inside, and then closed the door behind her. Outside, the rainstorm seemed to pick up speed and the walls and floorboards groaned under the pressure. "You don't usually make house calls."

Shrugging off the raincoat's hood, Larrin made a quick survey of the small cabin before she turned in all seriousness to Sam. "Didn't know how else to get in touch with you quickly enough."

Sam tensed. "Is it the dyson ring?"

"No. Worse." Larrin's eyes narrowed. "Remember those Hive ships we detected converging close to M2V-875 two days ago?"

"They've moved?" Leaning against the edge of her desk, Sam bit her lip. The ships had been responsible for the increased culling recently according to _Daedalus_ and the Travelers. Since no ZPM subspace signal had been detected, they'd surmised it had to be the other factions that were banding together in an attempt to get a fighting chance against the superhive.

"Yes. This morning. The scout ship managed to track them for a while before they pulled too far ahead." Pausing, her lips thinned into a tense line. "Based on their last trajectory though, they're not headed for wherever that superhive might be. They're headed to Atlantis."

* * *

The screen didn't lie, even if he wished it would. Far away in a distant solar system eight Wraith Hive ships had only just exited hyperspace, presumably to regenerate. If they continued along the path the long-range sensors projected, they'd come right to Atlantis.

Slowly, Xiaoyi turned from the screen to face him with those cold, dark eyes that occasionally sent shivers down Rodney's spine. "How long, Dr McKay?"

"At current speed and taking a regeneration stop into account, five days." He looked wearily at her, feeling the lurking of a dark cloud over his head. Why couldn't they ever catch a break? They'd just gotten back on their feet and now this… Rodney sighed deeply. His tone lacked energy. "Even if we cannot detect a ZedPM subspace signal, it doesn't mean that there isn't one. One of them could be here before the others."

"Can Atlantis withstand an attack?" Woolsey asked, his face grim yet steadfast whereas some minor IOA members looked slightly unfocused and panicky.

To the side, Rodney wasn't pleased to see Lt Colonel Dawkins share the latters' expressions. Not for the first time, he wished John was here and Rodney felt like the only one left of the old crowd. Jennifer hadn't been able to leave her duties in the infirmary at the moment. All the other faces were familiar but it wasn't enough. He felt strangely insecure.

"Against ordinary Hive ships, yes. We haven't tested the shields against an entire fleet, but based on past experiences we know they can at least withstand a couple of Hive ships at the same time. Of course, the Ancients withstood a siege for millennia, but they had the benefit of a full ZedPM complement. But the moment we hook up the second ZedPM, the superhive will be able to find us, whether it's part of the fleet or not."

"Then our most viable option is to retreat."

The statement came from Xiaoyi and Rodney hadn't expected that. He knew how the IOA had felt about the last retreat – aka the cat and mouse chase – Atlantis had performed. Judging by the surprised looks sent her way the other council members hadn't expected her suggestion either.

"From what I understand," Xiaoyi continued, "even with one ZPM, Atlantis should be capable of travelling to the closest edge of the galaxy well before the Wraith fleet arrives. In addition, the ordinary Hive ships do not have long-range sensors sensitive enough to detect us in hyperspace, so we should manage to remain undetected. Would you not agree, Dr McKay?"

Rodney opened and closed his mouth several times, stunned. He might have to revise the myth that the IOA members did not have the heads for basic military tactics. "Uh… yes."

Nodding, Xiaoyi coolly turned her head to Woolsey. "Then we will simply need a new location."

* * *

_"It's a tight schedule, but we'll make it somehow."_

"You sure?" Standing in front of the shimmering event horizon, radio in hand, Sam frowned. "Faulty or not, some of those satellites were practically scrap metal to begin with."

" _Then we'll have to make do without them,"_ Larrin snapped in Sam's earpiece. In the background, there was a flurry of activity from people and equipment being moved around. _"One way or another, we'll get that ring to give you at least a couple of shots. Can't promise anything else but based on your theories, one shot should be enough, right?"_

"Theoretically, yes." Sam resisted the urge to groan. Things had a tendency to muck up just when they weren't supposed to. At least the _Daedalus_ had dropped by earlier on their way to Atlantis and picked up the stargate satellite, just in case the Wraith – one faction or the other – would be able to detect the city in hyperspace after all. "What about the fleet? Would you be ready to step in in case there's a battle?"

" _You've got the_ Vestige _and a couple of others firmly at your side,"_ Larrin reiterated. " _As for the rest, it's up to them, but I'll argue your case. Throw them out an airlock too, if necessary."_ She sighed. _"Don't get your hopes up, though."_

"I know." Rubbing the ridge of her nose, Sam closed her eyes. For once, she hoped everything would go according to plan. "In any case, I'll send John with our spare ZPM as soon as possible."

She just had to find some viable excuse. Since this morning, Atlantis had basically been locked down in anticipation of the coming retreat, with all off-world teams told to stand by until Atlantis had put down on a new planet. If John simply left in the middle of all this, it'd look too suspicious. She couldn't afford that now.

 _"We'll keep the door open,"_ were Larrin's last words before she signed off. The stargate closed down moments later with a final _whoosh_.

Gripping the radio tightly in her hand, Sam looked back at Hailey, who stood pale, worn-out and tense next to the DHD and Captain Matthews. Both straightened as she approached.

"You have your jobs. Get to it."

* * *

Fresh from the showers and her 24-rotation on Tirana, Reese walked with a purpose. The clanging of workout machines echoed down the hallway, leading her all the way to the gym. There was no one there except Ramirez, who was seated in the workout station working on his thighs.

Sweat poured down his face, his shirt nearly soaked through. An empty water bottle and a crumpled towel lay next to him. Even from a distance, Reese could see he was pushing too hard. His muscles had started to shake, but he gritted his teeth and continued.

"Estúpido," she muttered beneath her breath. Narrowing her eyes, she marched straight through the gym and stopped next to him. "What do you think you're doing, Ramirez?"

"Staying in shape, Cap'n." The words came intermixed with some heavy breaths.

"You need to _rest_." Reese reached out to put her hand on the lever, trying to stop him. It was slapped away. Stunned, she gaped at him.

"I need to get back in action, is what I need." Unfazed, Ramirez returned his hand to one of the handles and continued pushing his legs up against the padded lever. "Haven't you heard? The Wraith are coming."

"I heard," Reese said, folding her arms defensively. He'd never slapped her hand away before. He'd always let her in. "I also heard that you've been here two times already today. Whatever happened to taking a day's rest between workouts? Your body won't heal faster like this. You _know_ that."

"Whatever happened to _leaving me the hell alone_?" Ramirez's voice rose angrily as he abruptly dropped his feet and sat forward. He glared at her while picking up his towel and wiping off his sweaty face. "I'm not some wounded bird, Cap'n. I don't need you treating me like some fucking nanny!"

Reese's jaw dropped. "That's _not_ what—"

"I don't need your help. I can make it on my own." Easing his feet out of the workout station, Ramirez rose to his feet…and almost fell back on his bum. "Joder!"

Ignoring his swearing, she was immediately at his side. She was about to take his arm to help him up when, without warning, Ramirez forcibly pushed her away.

She stumbled back, shocked, her ribcage aching painfully from the sudden shove. "What the hell, Ramirez?"

"Fuck you _,_ Cap'n!" Eyes narrowed angrily, Ramirez pulled himself up to his feet and brought the empty water bottle with him. He then shakily walked towards the water dispenser in the corner, the words trailing behind him: "I told you to leave me the fuck alone. You fucking annoy me. Damn puta."

A different kind of pain rose in her chest. Reese might just know the basics of Spanish, but she knew full well what _that_ word meant. Tears gathering in her eyes, she turned furiously on her heel and left.

Before she'd reached the end of the hallway, she heard the workout station's levers and weights _clang_ again.

* * *

"What have you got?" The question preceded him. Half running up the staircase, slightly out of breath, Woolsey reached the console where McKay and Xiaoyi were gathered. The former angled his computer screen so that he could see.

"Small planet on the outskirts of the galaxy, fourth planet from the sun: much colder climate than we're used to, but they've got a viable atmosphere and an eighteen-thousand feet deep ocean. We could even hide under the polar cap if necessary."

"A bit limiting in terms of using the outdoors," Woolsey smiled wryly, then caught sight of Xiaoyi's steely, unamused face. "But that's not our primary concern. How long would it take to travel there?"

"Two days, and that's if we put everything non-essential into the shields and stardrive." McKay pulled up an image on the screen of the approximate distance between point A and B. "The good thing is that it's taking us further away from the Wraith fleet. The bad thing is that spending so much power on the travel itself will leave us vulnerable should we be attacked somewhere along the way."

Woolsey met Xiaoyi's eyes. There really weren't any other options. "Sounds like a risk we will have to take."

"I agree," said Xiaoyi, but Woolsey felt it was more like a courtesy to him than any real interest in his opinion. The exchange left him slightly on edge as Xiaoyi turned to the room at large, where Dawkins and a few other councilmembers had also appeared. "All departments are to start preparations for the retreat immediately. Hourly progress reports are to be sent to my inbox. Remember, we need to be as energy-effective as possible, so final approval goes through my office. We will leave tomorrow morning at 09:00."

Woolsey frowned. He would've thought speed and time would be of the essence. In their previous retreats, they'd developed routines to efficiently and quickly close down everything non-essential and be on their way without hours.

As the others left for their duties, he turned to Xiaoyi and asked in a low voice: "Tomorrow?"

"Five days, Richard." Xiaoyi gave him a cool stare, giving away nothing. "We have time to ensure that all is in order before we leave. This will not be some foolhardy, stumbling retreat like last time. _This time_ , there will be no casualties."

* * *

There was a different atmosphere this time around. The last time the Wraith had come for Atlantis there'd been something akin to chaos. From what the Pegasus veterans had told her, the days preceding the tactical retreat had been busy with evacuating native settlers along the superhive's path. The city had been full of people, crates, equipment and animals. It'd been full of life.

As she walked the hallways now, Reese felt melancholic. Five hundred people in the city, two hundred on the _Daedalus,_ and about a hundred on Tirana were a mere drop in the ocean of Earth's original population. You could wander around Atlantis without running into anyone, even on the barracks level.

It was so different from when she'd arrived in the midst of the evacuation chaos. Feeling as if she was just shuffled along an assembly line until she wound up with a hundred others in some room, packed almost like fish in a barrel. There'd been shouting, crying, huffing and puffing, and no one had given them any news…until Colonel Carter's voice sounded on the speakers and announced there'd be no more dial-ins from the SGC, followed by General O'Neill's last message.

Survive.

That's what they'd done. Put one foot in front of the other, swallowed one more forkful of food, and followed orders like the good soldiers they were. And here they were, ten months later.

Reese stopped and looked around. The hallway was empty. To the side, tall narrow windows exposed the dark, rainy storm crashing against the glass that'd plagued Atlantis for weeks. The reddish metal hues of the walls and floors had become familiar, just like the concrete walls of the SGC had once been.

For some reason, her stomach hurt. She felt nauseous, on edge, and…strange. Just strange.

"Captain!"

Startled, Reese spun around and saw Kerrick running down the hallway at top speed, dressed in workout gear, gasping for breath.

"You gotta come quickly. It's Ramirez."

An icy shiver ran down Reese's spine. She didn't think. She just broke into a cold run in the direction Kerrick was coming from, despite her legs protesting the sudden movement, and passed Kerrick, who made an abrupt turn and ran to catch up.

Kerrick led her straight to the gym. Even before they reached it, Reese could hear shouting and curses only associated with one thing. She swore underneath her breath and turned to Kerrick with a dark grimace. "Get Colonel Sheppard and security ASAP."

Coming up on the T-section, Kerrick broke off to the left while Reese veered right. She reached the open doorway to the gym and stepped inside. Despite her suspicions, the sight that met her made her halt mid-step.

In the middle of the crowd that'd gathered, Ramirez had sergeant Nelson's head trapped in a headlock. The latter's face was turning dark red, almost indistinguishable from the red blood seeping down from a cut across his eyebrow and underneath his eye. Ramirez looked worse. His jaw was puffy and tinged dark, his gritted teeth covered in blood that spilled over his lips. He had two more colourful swells on his cheek and left eye, each going to turn into a really nasty bruise.

And in spite of all that, Reese thought the look in his eyes were the worst of all. It wasn't him. They displayed someone dark, angry and alien and not the man she now called her closest friend.

Suddenly, Nelson roared and exploded backwards. People jumped out of their way as he pushed back and slammed Ramirez against the closest wall, releasing the headlock. He immediately followed with an upward strike with his elbow, catching Ramirez in the face.

Stunned, Ramirez's hand flew to his nose as Nelson stepped away, wheezing for breath. The latter sneered. "You asked for it, you fucker! Don't pick a fight you can't win."

It was the wrong thing to say. With a yell, Ramirez ignored his now bloody nose and threw himself at Nelson, who sluggishly pulled his arms up to block the incoming punch. Ramirez didn't quit, however. He just kept coming, one punch after the other, trying to find a way past Nelson's defences.

Reese knew it'd deteriorate quickly and glared at the passive bystanders – a mix of scientists and Privates, but no other senior officers. "Don't just stand there – grab them!"

They reacted, fear replaced by the calm that followed adhering to clear orders. As any good leader had shown her, Reese led the way. She reached Ramirez first along with two Privates, and grabbed his left arm with both hands. Before she could twist it backwards, he'd slipped out of her grasp and swung the arm at her. She saw black just before the impact hit her straight in the nose.

Somehow, she managed to ignore the crunching sound and to grab on again, while the two Privates grabbed hold of Ramirez's other arm, and together they wrestled the sergeant to the ground.

"Don't make it worse, Sergeant," Reese hissed into his ear. Liquid pooled and spilled out of her nostrils. Her whole face ached but she didn't care. Right now, she just saw red. "You're in deep shit as it is without adding a second assault on a senior officer on the list."

Ramirez didn't answer, but he stopped struggling against them, even though his muscles remained flexed and tense. She glanced up to confirm that Nelson was also contained, and was pleased to see that he'd calmed down considerably.

"Oh, you gotta be kidding me!" In the entrance, Sheppard had finally arrived ahead of four SOs. There was a furious expression on his face. "Nelson, Ramirez – I gave you a _direct_ order to stop this stupidity months ago."

Neither man responded. Sheppard gave a disgusted noise and turned to the SOs. "Put them straight in the brig. The medic can see to them down there."

With back-up at the scene, Reese let go of Ramirez and got to her feet. The world around her swayed for a moment and she felt dizzy. Sheppard noticed.

"You better get down to the infirmary and take care of that nose, Captain." He watched the SOs lead Nelson and Ramirez away, then turned back to her with a dark frown. "Come see me straight after. I want a full report."

A part of Reese told her to stick by Ramirez and not press charges. But the events of the day still hurt and she knew inaction wouldn't do him any favours. Not now.

_Hit me once, I'll let it slide. Hit me twice…_

"Aye, sir."

* * *

The night was promising him a headache, and it wasn't over yet. Walking down the hallway towards a dead end, John rubbed the ridge of his eyebrows tiredly. Maybe he'd be able to catch some sleep before Larrin put him to work. Though, knowing her, he'd have better chances in the brig with Ramirez and Nelson.

"Stupid grunts," he muttered as he approached the three lights on the wall. Touching them in sequence, he proceeded to go straight through the wall at the end of the hallway. The laboratory lit up at his entrance and John looked around to get his bearings.

The sight made him tense. Someone had been there. Large crates were missing from the various stacks, and some had been rearranged. In the middle of the room, someone had left a box of tools and equipment, including a cutting torch. At a second glance, John saw that some of the crates had scorch marks, but those were mainly superficial. Sam had told him the metal in the crates were designed to withstand such tools.

Panicked, John walked straight to one of the stacks where he expected to find a smallish container, but it wasn't there. He looked everywhere. It was simply gone.

_Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!_

He turned abruptly on his heel and ran out of the room, down the hallways and around corners, until he reached the transporter.

As soon as the transporter doors closed and the control panel map appeared before him, he punched the wall and swore again. First Dawkins had him running all around the place and making sure things were locked down for the retreat, then there was the whole damn incident with Ramirez and Nelson and now this…

_Sam's gotta know. Fast._

With a quick jab, he chose his destination. Since Sam was on Tirana, he only had one way to get in touch with her: the stargate.

There was a hum and a tingle, and then the doors opened.

"Don't move."

John froze. Right outside the transporter, three Wraith stunners were pointed straight at him, one of which was held by Dawkins. Recognising his target, the man looked scared shitless for a moment. The two SOs next to him glanced at him for orders, clearly surprised at their target, but Dawkins didn't lower his stunner.

"What the hell?" Tensing up, John narrowed his eyes and shifted his feet into a ready stand. "You crazy, Dawkins? Point those things somewhere else."

Looking guilty now, Dawkins tightened his grip. "I'm sorry, Sheppard. Orders are orders."

"Whose orders?" Lips curled into a sneer, John knew the answer perfectly well. There was only one person with the strings to pull this off.

"Don't do anything stupid, Sheppard." Despite the slight tremble in his hand, Dawkins waved the stunner towards the hallway outside the transporter. "Please step out."

"And what if I don't?" John challenged, raising his hand slightly towards the control panel. The stunner spun back at him firmly and his hand continued to hover in mid-air. "How you gonna explain this to the troops?"

He glanced at the two SOs. He knew them well, even if they weren't originally expedition members. He'd trained them, taught them how to get around the city, and had had drinks with them on the occasional pub night in Little Chow. Both glanced uneasily at each other and then at Dawkins, who stared resolutely now at John.

"That you're a criminal that's been conspiring against the current leadership of Atlantis and is a threat to the city's integrity and stability."

John cocked an eyebrow. "You let the Ice Queen write your speeches for you?"

He'd apparently crossed a line. Dawkins turned furious, and with newfound courage, he surged forward to plant the stunner against John's chest. With his spare hand, he grabbed hold of John's jacket and pulled him out of the transporter. Once the doors closed, Dawkins let go and gestured towards the staircase behind them.

"Go."

Slowly, John complied. His immediate surprise had passed and his head was clearer now. He knew there'd be no point making a move. What he needed was intel and there was just one way to get it.

As expected, Xiaoyi was in the operations centre. Unexpectedly, Chuck was not. Shang had apparently replaced him for the graveyard shift, though when that'd happened, John had no idea. He'd just talked to the Canadian a few hours ago when the man was heading off for his shift.

"So, it _was_ you," Xiaoyi stated. Coming to stand in front of him, she surveyed him with a cold and slightly twisted expression. "Having a late evening stroll on the East Pier, Colonel?"

To the side, John saw the image of Atlantis on the wall-mounted screen, overlaid with the internal sensors that detected life signs. No one else was anywhere close to the East Pier. Denying it was pointless.

"It's not illegal. I've been running all over this city for years. Good cardio."

"Except for a moment, you disappeared from the sensors." Tilting her head slightly, Xiaoyi's eyes darkened. "To my knowledge, there is just one place where you can do that."

John said nothing.

"We monitored the lab, Sheppard," said Xiaoyi evenly. "I knew someone would eventually return to that place, especially now when _power_ …"

A console beeped.

Xiaoyi startled. She turned abruptly to Shang, who stared down at his computer with shock. "What is it?"

"There's another fleet." The words were almost whispered. Wide-eyed, Shang turned the computer screen towards the rest of them. "No ZPM subspace signal, but…"

On one end of the map was the first fleet, consisting of eight larger red dots – the Hive ships – and numerous smaller ones signifying Wraith cruisers. At the other end was Atlantis, simply a large blue dot on the unnamed planet. And coming from a different trajectory than the first fleet were twelve large red dots with accompanying smaller ones.

As far as John knew, there were currently just two Wraith fleets in Pegasus, and one of them possessed a weapon powerful enough to wipe them off the face of the planet.

"Shit."

* * *

 **Next:** "Bringing in the rain."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GLOSSARY (Warning: Language)
> 
> "Estoy más preparado que nunca" = I'm as ready as I'll ever be.
> 
> "Padre todopoderoso y lleno de misericordia, por el poder que me concede tu Palabra, expulsa de mí toda enfermedad…" = Beginning of a Catholic prayer of healing in Spanish.
> 
> Abuela = grandmother
> 
> Jodan = Fuck
> 
> Puta = whore


	25. DAY 308 (Part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In response to the new turn of events, long-laid plans are finally carried out.

* * *

**TWENTY-THREE, PART TWO | "Bringing in the rain."**

_Music: "Radioactive" by Pentatonix and Lindsey Stirling_

* * *

_SO = security officer_

* * *

**DAY 308**

The operations centre was overcrowded with technicians, scientists, SOs and politicians alike.

Tense and on edge, Woolsey leaned down next to Amelia Banks' console, if only to rid himself of the feeling that he was superfluous in this situation. "Any change?"

"No, sir. The two fleets are still kicking each other's collective asses," Banks said, staring at the sensor map on her computer screen. Still some distance away from Atlantis's blue dot, the red dots had become a single mass of colour. "Been at it for forty-six minutes. About six Hive ships and numerous cruisers have been destroyed."

Woolsey didn't know whether to let out a relieved breath or not. While it had surprised him that the second fleet had intercepted the first, thereby creating a perfect diversion for Atlantis' retreat, he couldn't shake off the sensation that something was wrong.

Though, the sensation might be related to the unexpected incarceration of Colonel Sheppard last night.

"Are we ready?" Everyone looked up as Xiaoyi ascended the final steps of the grand staircase. She looked calm, collected and practically relaxed; a stark opposite to many others.

 _She must've been to the stasis room,_ Woolsey surmised. It'd become a habit of hers, and it appeared to be something that eased her tension.

"All non-essential personnel have been redirected to the mess halls or crew quarters," Dawkins reported, his manner sharp as Xiaoyi passed him. "The infirmary reports that they are standing by."

"Everything we could spare has been transferred to the shields and stardrive," said McKay, seated behind the console next to Banks. He swallowed uneasily before meeting Xiaoyi's eyes. The news of Sheppard's arrest for treason had hit him hard.

Woolsey assumed that if it hadn't been for Xiaoyi specifically keeping him busy in the operations centre, the Canadian scientist would instead be trying to clear Sheppard's name, or maybe even conspire to break him out.

McKay continued in a tense tone, "Takahashi reports that he is ready in the control chair."

"Good." Xiaoyi offered a rare smile, then turned to Shang, seated behind the communications console. "And _Daedalus_?"

"They will rendezvous with us at the halfway point." Shang nodded towards the wall-mounted screen, where a smaller, blue dot marked _Daedalus_ was barely seen on the opposite edge of the map from the Wraith battle. The battle cruiser was going to scout ahead to their new destination. "Sensors are tracking them."

"Excellent." Clasping her hands in front of her, Xiaoyi turned to Woolsey. "Then we are ready."

Nodding, Woolsey kept his thoughts to himself as he turned to Shang. "Please tell Dr Takahashi to take us up."

The order was relayed in an efficient, detached manner. Woolsey watched the whole thing unfold with a disconnected feeling of his own. While there was no chaos this time, no true sense of urgency, he knew something was different. Knew, but couldn't prove. After all, he couldn't say 'because she smiled', no matter how rarely it happened.

Atlantis shook with the strain of breaking atmosphere. On the screen in front of McKay, Woolsey saw the power levels take a dip. The man himself looked worried as he bit his lip nervously.

Then, just as suddenly as it had started, the shaking stopped.

"We're out of the atmosphere," McKay said. "Power levels are stabilising." On the screen, the levels filled up until they showed green across the whole table. The Canadian scientist looked up at Xiaoyi. "We're ready to engage the hyperdrive."

Again, Xiaoyi smiled. She gestured to Shang, who turned on the citywide speakers. "Attention all… 我想回家。" (1)

Woolsey frowned. He wasn't well-versed in Chinese, but he assumed—

All of a sudden every door slammed shut. Woolsey spun around at the sound, and was staggered to see that the SOs standing in the operations centre had unholstered their Wraith stunners and powered them up; ready to take aim at anyone who made a sudden move.

Disconcerted, he took a step back and swung his eyes at Xiaoyi, who gave him a cold, levelled stare.

Somehow he managed to keep the heat out of his voice. "What's going on, Shen?"

"We are retreating." With a gesture to Dawkins, Xiaoyi pointed at Banks, McKay and some of the other technicians, who all gaped at the stunners that were suddenly pointed their way.

Although the SOs gave Dawkins a lingering glance, they all complied with his silent order. Striding forth, they rounded up the technicians Xiaoyi had pointed out and led them away from the gate room.

Woolsey stood tense and quiet next to Banks's console, following the action with his eyes. If the plan were the same, there'd be no need to pick out anyone who might go against her wishes.

Therefore, he turned to Xiaoyi and assumed his carefully practiced lawyer's mask. "Where?"

If she was surprised he'd guessed her intentions, Xiaoyi didn't show it. She merely turned fully towards him with a calculating gleam in her eyes. "Home."

The hairs rose at the back of Woolsey's neck. "Earth is gone."

"No." Xiaoyi's eyes hardened. "It isn't."

* * *

"I'd finally gotten back on my feet. Why'd you have to go and ruin that, Ramirez?" Seated on one of the benches inside the cell, Sergeant Nelson held a long-since-thawed ice pack against his face. He looked worse than he'd done last night; all bruised, swollen and covered in butterfly stitches.

Standing next to the electrified bars, tense after Xiaoyi's earlier citywide announcement about their change of plans, John turned back with a wry look. "You could've just walked away, Nelson. Been the better man."

"I'm no one's punching bag," Nelson stated with a glare. "You hear that, Ramirez?"

Stretched out on a separate bench, Ramirez stared quietly into the ceiling. He'd made no further attempts at conversation since last night, when he'd explained there was no excuse for what he did. Nelson, on the other hand, was a real chatterbox when he was calm.

John opened his mouth to say something when the doors to the brig opened. He twisted abruptly, ready to badmouth or cajole whoever came through, but was surprised to see Ronon holding his hands behind his head.

"Fancy seeing you here," Ronon said sourly as he was pushed further inside by an SO's stun weapon.

"VIP lounge. You should feel special." John smiled humourlessly, to which Ronon simply grunted.

He didn't maintain John's attention, however. That honour went to one Lt Colonel Michael Dawkins, who then appeared in the doorway. Something twisted in the pit of John's stomach.

"What the hell's going on, Dawkins?" Inches away from the cell bars, he glared at the uncomfortable man walking safely behind the two armed security officers. "You rounding up all the veterans now? What's next – the firing squad?"

Dawkins stared fixedly ahead, yet swallowed visibly. He offered no explanation, but John could see the sweat trickling down from his slick haircut as he passed the cell. Whatever was going on, Dawkins didn't like it.

"Why Earth? Why now?" Voice low, John narrowed his eyes at the other colonel's back after he'd passed. "She share that with you or you just tagging along?"

Still, there was no answer. While the SOs kept Ronon under guard, Dawkins went straight for another cell and opened it. He then stepped back expectantly, one hand on his holstered Wraith stunner.

Wearing a mutinous glare, Ronon stepped inside. He passed Dawkins slowly and threateningly, to which the colonel shrank visibly, and lowered his hands after the door closed and the power to the cell bars came back on.

Like a scared rabbit Dawkins skirted his eyes at John, but they didn't stay long. He turned to one of the SOs. "They'll…uh…they'll remain here until Miss Xiaoyi gives the order. No one is allowed to contact them."

As the guard confirmed the order and Dawkins proceeded to hightail it out of there with the second SO, John clenched his fists tightly. Across the room, he met Ronon's eyes and gave a barely perceivable gesture.

_Time to wait._

* * *

The stargate area on Tirana swarmed with armed people and equipment. Stepping off the path that'd led them through the woods from the mining colony, Sam gazed back at Hailey, her eyes narrowed in restrained anger.

"Just be prepared, Captain. There are only two reasons why John wouldn't have checked in, and, thanks to the Travelers, we know for a fact that the Wraith are still battling each other. So, what we'll have to do now—"

She was halfway through her sentence when she felt the familiar tingle of the Asgard beam. With a shocked expression directed at Hailey, she was encompassed in a glimmering light, transported moments later to the _Daedalus_ bridge.

Caldwell gave her a levelled stare from the captain's chair, his jaw slightly clenched with tension. "We've got a problem."

The disorientation accompanying the transport beam flushed away swiftly. Sam tensed. "What?"

"Received new orders an hour ago," Caldwell said darkly. His hands fisted slightly around the armrests. "We're to evacuate Tirana of all Earth personnel and set an immediate course for Earth."

Shock didn't quite cover the feeling Sam felt. Her mouth went dry. "How?"

"Apparently, Xiaoyi's been able to finish a project started by the Ancients: the Wormhole Drive. It can—"

"—transport you instantaneously to another galaxy," Sam finished, stunned. At Caldwell's raised eyebrow, she added, "It was one of the many options I researched when we were running from the superhive. But I scrapped the idea immediately. The precise calculations and amount of power required alone…"

Then it suddenly clicked. Her eyes widened as she faced Caldwell, her whole body going rigid. "They managed to find the second ZPM."

Caldwell's grimace confirmed it. "Sheppard's been incarcerated, accused of treason. Xiaoyi's got the entire city in lockdown. Apparently, she thinks they'll be able to get away before the superhive detects them."

He paused and glanced around. The entire bridge was quiet, clearly following their conversation. Not that it mattered. By now the entire crew of _Daedalus_ knew far more about what was going on in the shadows than the majority of Atlantis's population. However, it was only now that Sam sensed the tense pressure in the atmosphere. It was like they were holding their breath. Just as she was.

"We can't let her connect that ZPM." Tightening the arms crossed in front of her chest, Sam's expression hardened.

"It might already be too late," said Caldwell grimly.

* * *

Every box had been checked off. Shen had made sure of it herself. There wouldn't be any surprises this time. Dr Takahashi had assured her calculating the jump, along with the amount of power they had available, was his best work. She'd known him long enough to know he'd hold true to his word.

Surveying the wall-mounted screen, Shen confirmed that the Wraith battle was still taking place. More Hive ships had been lost, but none had retreated yet. Perhaps they weren't able to, or maybe they were sick of running. She could understand the latter.

_This will be the last time._

"Second ZPM is connected."

Blinking, Shen turned away from the screen and gave Shang a nod of acknowledgment. Woolsey stood in the background, quiet and passive. But his eyes gave him away. They were piercing, almost lazily following her wherever she turned. Uneasy, she turned away.

"Power up the Wormhole Drive," she ordered. The technician on Shang's left, an older male scientist named Samson, complied. "Keep an eye on the Wraith battle."

"One ship has broken off from the rest," said another technician, Vygotsky, whose bespectacled face was buried in the computer screen in front of her. "No ZPM subspace signal detected."

"They might have received a transmission from the superhive, wherever it is." Voice low and quiet, Woolsey still carried weight in this room. Shen saw it immediately in the slight tension of Vygotsky and Samson's shoulders, and in their shifting eyes.

She turned to Woolsey, steeling herself. "We will be long gone before then."

"Two minutes to Wormhole Drive," Samson said aloud.

"The Wraith ship is picking up speed," Vygotsky reported, her voice rising slightly in intonation.

Gesturing to Shang, Shen touched her earpiece radio. "Dr Takahashi, engage at the end of countdown. You have a green light."

His reply was swift. _"Yes, Madam Xiaoyi_."

Shen turned off the radio and was met by hesitant yet expectant faces. The silence that followed was deafening. She straightened her shoulders, intent on putting on a show of strength and reassurance at this crucial junction.

"How do you know Earth is safe?" Woolsey's voice was still low, but his eyes were seeing straight through her façade.

Angrily, she turned her face away and stared resolutely at the wall-mounted screen where a large red dot was soaring towards Atlantis. Even as the moments crawled by, she focused her entire attention on it. The silence, however, was difficult to block.

"This isn't how a democracy works, Shen. We have a right to know." Woolsey's voice rose in volume and in frustration. Slowly, he stepped forward.

Seeing the action in the corner of her eye, Shen tensed, but he stopped after a single step. It was enough, however. Her tight control wavered. "I—"

 _"Engaging Wormhole Drive,_ " Takahashi said on the speakers.

There was a low whine as the stardrive powered up, followed by an increasing tremble that threatened to unbalance her and a weird sensation behind her navel—

—and then everything came to a crashing halt.

* * *

For a flickering second, the power went out. Seated on the bench inside the cell, John jumped to his feet and ran towards the cell door…only to jolt back as emergency power abruptly lit up the cell bars. It was the only sign of power, however. Everything else was dark.

"Damn it!" Unable to punch the walls, John clenched his fists and let them fall impotently to his sides, nails digging into his palms.

"What's going on, sir?" The voice belonged to Ramirez, making it his first few words of the day.

"Dunno." Teeth grinding, John listened carefully for any signs of a battle taking place. There was nothing. Just like an ordinary power outage, or so it would seem. "Something must've gone wrong with that Drive plan of theirs."

"Good," Nelson said, pleased. He'd spent most of the past few hours arguing why going back to Earth was a crazy idea. At least it'd convinced John of his allegiance, compared with the guard on the outside of the brig, who'd refused to let himself be convinced that he was on the wrong side.

"No, it isn't." Turning back to stare at the two sergeants in the low illumination from the cell bars, John clenched his fists further. The pain grounded him. "They probably needed a second ZPM to even attempt that Drive, meaning that for at least a short amount of time…"

"The superhive got our location," Ronon finished across the room. He was barely visible behind the cell bars, his face covered in shadows. His tone promised danger. If he wasn't locked up…

"Oh," Nelson said, stumped. "Well, _fuck_."

* * *

The situation was too dire for Woolsey to enjoy the frantic look in Xiaoyi's face. Whatever had happened, Atlantis was still in orbit above the planet they'd called home for eight months. They hadn't even moved an inch, but now they were barely functioning. After ten minute's work, Samson had managed to restore power to life-support and emergency shields around the main tower, but nothing else. No communications, no weapons, no full shields and no drives. If something caused them to lose orbit, they would crash into the atmosphere and burn up before they reached the ground.

And then there was that Hive ship that'd broken away from the Wraith battle and had sped faster than ordinary Hive ships in this direction. Woolsey was starting to think that it couldn't get any worse.

"Do we have the power to dial out?" Leaning over Shang's console, Xiaoyi's lips were drawn in a thin line, but her eyes were wide and tinged with fear. It was the most emotion Woolsey had seen from her in ten months. "If we manage to send a message to Tikwa, perhaps they may be able to help us."

Woolsey cleared his throat. Xiaoyi's head snapped up and her face turned into an ugly grimace. Still, he wasn't deterred. This was beyond petty politics. "We have a large staff of fully competent scientists here in Atlantis, and McKay and Zelenka know this city better than the back of their hands. Let them help. The more people we have working on this, the faster we'll be able to get back on our feet."

"I am fully aware of this, _Mr Woolsey_." Pushing off the console she was leaning against, Xiaoyi marched towards him. To the side, Colonel Dawkins stirred in anticipation, probably ready to come to her rescue. The action wasn't lost on Woolsey.

"Then why turn to the Administration?" His voice was hard. "We might have our differences of opinion concerning Earth, Shen, but this is a matter of life and death. Even now, that Hive ship is headed this way and who knows how many more. We're dead in the water and defenceless. What we need aren't people from outside. We need whoever is _right here_."

As he'd guessed, Xiaoyi had no logical response. Yet her eyes still bore into his, clearly searching for a weak spot. For once, however, Woolsey felt confident he was right and she'd see that too. At this point, she couldn't afford _not_ to.

"Colonel," Xiaoyi turned abruptly on her heel. "Get McKay and Zelenka back up here."

* * *

Staring at the long-range sensor map where Atlantis's IFF tag had been little more than thirty minutes ago, Caldwell rested his chin in his palm. "Could they have succeeded?"

Next to him, Carter grimaced. "Honestly, I don't know. There's a reason I scrapped the Wormhole Drive idea, even when we had access to three ZPMs. According to the Ancients behind the original project it's just too unstable. Chances are they've failed, but whether they survived…"

Caldwell frowned. He didn't like Carter's implication. Releasing a controlled sigh, he pointed to the map. "It's possible they disconnected a ZPM, right? Their signal wouldn't be strong enough then to show up on _Daedalus'_ sensors, at least not at this distance."

"It's possible. The only way we'll know for sure is to either go there to check it out or attempt a dial."

He considered it for a moment. " _Daedalus_ can be there within two hours, but dialling is faster."

Carter nodded. "I'll radio Hailey."

She made as if to leave but then paused and gave him a second look. "If they managed to get to Earth without blowing up…" Caldwell raised an eyebrow expectantly. "What do we do?"

He supposed it was a valid question. Casting an eye around them and satisfied to see no eavesdroppers, he said in a low voice, "We follow Homeworld Command's orders. We survive. Whatever it takes."

"Good." Carter's jaw tightened, her eyes glinting slightly. "Now, if you'll excuse me—"

_Blip._

A blue dot appeared on the sensor map, right where it'd been before it'd disappeared earlier.

* * *

"We've got it!"

McKay's shout came seconds before all the lights turned on and all the doors opened automatically. Woolsey blinked at the sudden difference in light, accustomed to the dimness from before. Conscious of his not-so-discreet guard, he approached McKay's console as the Canadian scientist began to elaborate.

"There was a failsafe in the system. Someone must've put it in place in case the Wormhole Drive failed. Sensors, shields and communications are coming online now."

Storming out of her office, where she'd spent the last ten minutes with Dawkins, Xiaoyi didn't waste a second. "Location of that Hive ship?"

Vygotsky ran her fingers across the keyboard, eyes fixed on her screen. "It's—it's four hours away! It's covered almost half the distance in just the past three hours."

"It's the superhive," Woolsey stated, his mouth going dry. He glanced at Xiaoyi to gauge her reaction. Her expression had gone rigid. "It must be. No other ship has been able to—"

"Recall _Daedalus_ immediately," Xiaoyi snapped at Shang, who jumped into action straightaway. She then turned to Zelenka, eyes wide yet dark. "How long until the drives are back?"

"Unknown." Edgy, Zelenka pushed his glasses further up his nose. "It-it could take anywhere between an hour and several days, depending on what's wrong."

"We have to run a diagnostic first," McKay interjected, clearly in his element now. It almost made Woolsey smile; the man truly thrived under pressure. "It'll take at least twenty minutes."

Xiaoyi's lips thinned. "Get to it."

She began to turn away, but before she could the stargate activated. Everyone stopped, tense, listening to the electronic spin and locking sound as the chevrons lit up one by one.

"Raise the shield," Xiaoyi said abruptly, breaking the silence. "If it is the Wraith attempting an invasion, they'll find no entry here."

She strode over to the balcony overlooking the gate room, flanked by Dawkins, who ordered his SOs to spread out and take up a defensive position in case the shield failed. It didn't seem like it would; as the seventh chevron locked in and the event horizon stabilised, the luminescent shimmer of the shield held back the unstable vortex just as designed.

For a tense moment, there was nothing. Then, "Madam, we have a radio transmission. It originates on Tirana."

From where he stood, Woolsey could see Xiaoyi tense even further and could understand why. _Daedalus_ was supposed to have picked up those on Tirana and left hours ago.

A strange shift happened. Almost seamlessly, Xiaoyi straightened and assumed a firm position on the balcony. Her voice was calm, yet cold. "Put it on the speakers."

" _Atlantis, this is Colonel Carter on Tirana._ Daedalus _just relayed the news about the failed Wormhole Drive and the approaching Hive ship. How may we be of assistance?"_

"Thank you for your concern, Colonel, but the matter is under control. Our best and brightest are working on restoring all systems to normal this very moment."

 _"How are the drives? Did they short out?"_ It sounded more like a statement than a question. Xiaoyi's stunned silence appeared to be answer enough. _"The Wormhole Drive is extremely risky, even under the best of circumstances. Even if you complemented them with naquadah generators, two ZPMs wouldn't have been enough to create the necessary voltage for the Drive. It'd just draw additional electric current and lead to overheating. Is Dr McKay there?"_

"…Yes." Xiaoyi's teeth were clenched.

" _Tell him to check the stardrive's primary conductors. Chances are they wouldn't have handled the overheating. You'll have to—"_

"Yes, _thank_ you, Colonel," Xiaoyi enunciated, before glaring back at the McKay and Zelenka, who were already immersed in their computers and the diagnostics. "I am sure Dr McKay and his team can take it from here." At his name, McKay's head popped up and he looked for a moment like a deer caught in headlights. Xiayoi, however, had already moved on. "Atlantis ou—"

"Ma'am, multiple encoded messages were just sent through, unknown destination." Behind one of the consoles, Samson looked stunned.

Off to the side, Woolsey tensed, a multitude of thoughts running through his head, none of which he could afford to keep for long; he was sure his reaction might be visible on his face. He glanced apprehensively at Xiaoyi, who turned furiously towards the shield-enclosed event horizon, which was still active.

"Who did you just call, Colonel?"

Carter didn't reply.

"Cut the connection _now."_ Angrily, Xiaoyi turned to Dawkins while Shang proceeded to carry out her order. "Seal off the main tower immediately. Post guards at every entrance." She glared back at Zelenka and McKay. "And get those drives back online!"

* * *

Her back against the wall, Reese peered slowly around the corner and assessed the situation. Only one guard at the end of the hallway, his back turned halfway towards her as he stared down the opposite end of the intersection. She was armed with both lethal and non-lethal weapons: a sidearm holstered at his side and a Wraith stunner in his hands.

She eased back into cover and silently relayed her information and consecutive order to the two soldiers with her. Greggs and Emerson nodded in confirmation and shifted into position. Reese raised the Wraith stunner she'd swiped from a patrol they'd taken down earlier, and checked the guard again.

He was staring straight at her, eyes widening in shock. Without thinking, Reese jumped out of cover and fired off a couple of stun shots. The first two were way off target, but the latter caught the guard straight in the guts before he had a chance to fire back. With a heavy _thud_ , he crumbled to the ground.

"Let's go." Reese waved the other two from cover.

Emerson took point and led the way down the hallway, immediately checking his corners once he'd reached the end. He then eased into a more relaxed position and looked back at her. "All clear."

"Greggs, get the door," Reese said, and reached down to pull the unconscious guard away from the doorway. After taking the guard's stunner, Emerson helped her. Thankfully, the guard didn't weigh much, at least not as much as Ramirez. Still, the action made her sore and broken nose itch and ache. She tried to ignore it.

Meanwhile, Greggs had found a palm-sized device they'd taken from the patrol earlier and connected it to the door controls. He ran the automated programme – some sort of key that unlocked the still-in-effect quarantine doors – and stepped back once the door had opened.

Reese and Emerson stormed inside, stunners at the ready.

"Finally!" Within the centre cell, Colonel Sheppard got up from one of the benches and threw his hands up in exaggerated gratitude. "Took you long enough."

"Sorry, sir." Seeing no additional guards, Reese stepped up to the control panel and lowered the energy shield around the cells. "Took a while to get confirmation from Colonel Carter. That, and we had to circumvent a lot of closed doors and patrols."

With the door open, Sheppard stepped outside and released a sigh of relief before turning towards her with a serious look. "What's the word?"

"City's dead in the water. At least one Hive ship is on its way. Colonel Carter wants you to retake control of the operations centre so that she can come through. Xiaoyi's got the place locked down."

Movement in the background drew Reese's attention. It was Ramirez, who stared at her with an indescribable emotion in his eyes, bruised and sorry-looking.

She ignored him, a flash of pain going up her sore nose. There wasn't time for that crap right now. If it were up to her, she'd leave him here until this whole thing was over. Sheppard apparently thought differently.

"We're gonna need all hands on this." He gave both Reese and Ramirez a look of warning, his tone brooking no argument. Clearly, he'd understood the underlying tension.

"Yes, sir." Reese's jaw clenched.

"We need weapons." Flexing his arm muscles, Ronon stepped up to them, his expression dark and threatening.

"The armouries are under guard." Reese gestured to the stunner in her hands. "We had to ambush a patrol to get a hold of these."

Sheppard nodded towards the door. "I know a place."

* * *

Despite the increased chatter on the tactical frequency when Dawkins called for immediate implementation of Delta-5 – the foothold resistance plan – they'd reached the storage room without any incidents. With the biometric sensors most likely used against them, John figured they'd have to act quickly.

"Back row, bottom containers on the left." Positioned in the open doorway, John pointed Matthews, Ronon and the rest towards the innermost part of the room. "There are hidden compartments underneath the office supplies containing zat guns, compliments of the SGC."

"Shoot to stun, sir?" Nelson asked, last to pass by him. "What if they're using live rounds?"

"Incapacitate only," John stated firmly, narrowing his eyes. "They're still our people, Sergeant. Can't afford to lose anyone."

"Dunno about that." Nelson's mutter was barely audible as he followed the others further into the storage room.

Back at the doorway, John resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He could understand the sentiment. There _were_ some people he wasn't sure he'd ever trust again, but Sam had stated it best: they'd have to live together afterwards too.

Sudden movement in the corner of his eye made John tense. He immediately pressed up against the wall, Wraith stunner at the ready, and called out, "Rogue."

"Squadron," a familiar voice called back, just as the soft scurrying of military boots on metal down the hallway stopped.

Relaxing, John stepped outside and eyed the newcomers. A large group of twelve combat-ready men and women, where most were Atlantis veterans, but some faces were from the SGC. "Good to see you, Major. You managed to get into an armoury?"

Lowering his own stunner, Major Lorne nodded. "We hit the one on the eight level. No resistance." At this, he pointed to two young Airmen standing off to the side – previous SGC evacuees. "They're with us."

"The more the merrier." John sent the two Airmen an acknowledging smirk. "How's that right fist of yours holding up, Janovec?"

The Airman in question grinned. "Ready to serve, sir."

"Good."

John turned back to the storage room where Ronon and Matthews now stepped out ahead of Ramirez, Nelson, Emerson and Greggs. All were carrying zats, although Ronon looked disgusted with his. Not that John could blame him. The zat wasn't as sophisticated as his usual energy weapon, even with that handy disintegration setting Sam had told him about.

Positioning himself so everyone was in his line of sight, John got down to business. "All right, listen up. Mission objective: retake control of the operations centre. By now, the main tower's been locked down in accordance with Delta-5 procedure, meaning a front-door approach will be difficult even with the correct key codes. As such, we'll have to use the back door." John turned towards Lorne. "Remember Michael's invasion last year?"

Lorne caught on immediately. "You need us to raise some noise, sir?"

"As much as you can give me. I want them too busy to stay focused on the biometric sensors." Counting heads, John made the calculation in his head. "Major, take your team along with Emerson and Greggs, and head down to barracks and let our people out of quarantine. Then proceed to the main tower and hit it from the second and fourth levels with everything you've got. Maintain radio silence; we don't know who's listening. You've got 30 minutes. Meanwhile…" He turned to Matthews, Ronon, Ramirez and Nelson. "We're gonna find a ride."

"A ride, sir?" Ramirez frowned.

John grinned briefly. "Yes. A ride, Sergeant."

* * *

The silence in the operations centre was deafening. Each of the technicians was immersed in his or her work, trying hard to return power to the stardrive, all the while conscious of the bare trembles echoing throughout the open rooms. It was a constant reminder that a few levels below, forty-odd people were trying to force their way inside the tower.

Shen walked restlessly among the consoles, peering over people's shoulders, her arms folded tightly. Her head was aching, and her shoulders, neck and lower back were so tense she that felt as though she might snap. Every other minute, she glanced towards the silent Woolsey seated in the back with his guard nearby. His apparent calm grated on her.

_He must be in on it too._

The echoing trembles increased in strength.

"Colonel…" Shen's teeth gritted tightly as she spun to stare expectantly at Dawkins, who immediately touched his earpiece radio and asked for an update. Frustrated, she rubbed her temple and cursed inwardly. This had all gone to hell very quickly.

"The defences are holding, ma'am. Even with C4, they shouldn't be able to penetrate the city's doors or walls…"

" _Shouldn't_?" Shen gave him a pointed, narrowed look.

Dawkins shifted uneasily on his feet, swallowing visibly. His once pristine haircut had become more frazzled with each passing moment. "Uh, _won't_ , ma'am. They won't get in."

"Madam Xiaoyi!" From behind his console, Samson panicked. "The upper Jumper Bay just opened. Yet, I cannot detect any vehicle entering, or any life signs!"

"Could it be a glitch in the system?" Immediately, Shen stormed over to his console as his hands began to run quickly across the keyboard. In the background, she noticed Woolsey perk up.

"Uh… It's possible. It could also be that someone disabled a Gateship's homing beacon and used it to gain access, since it's the only ship designed to open the access panel remotely. But that's never been do—" A message beeped on Samson's screen. "The Bay was just pressurised. I'm detecting five life signs."

"Colonel!" Shen practically shouted, and the man thankfully reacted quickly. With no way to seal off access between the Jumper Bay and the operations centre, their only defence was the ten soldiers stationed on this level.

Within moments, Dawkins and seven others had stormed up the stairs towards the Bay. In their wake, Shen pointed the remaining soldiers towards the back staircase, where they took up flanking positions. Then, she could do nothing but wait. All other activity had stopped. Everyone's eyes and ears were turned to the Jumper Bay one level above them.

There were suddenly shouts and the unmistakable sound of stunner weapons from far above. Heavy thuds sounded in the staircase, but no blood-curdling screams. That scared her most of all.

As the moments passed, Shen inched further away from the staircase, listening to the running steps approaching with a sinking feeling in her gut. Her breath caught in her throat at the sight of the first military boot on the uppermost visible steps.

The boot belonged to Sheppard. He stopped the second he caught sight of the SOs crouched on either side of the staircase and skipped back into cover before they could hit him with their stun weapons.

His powerful voice, however, penetrated the wall separating him from the operations centre. "This is Lieutenant Colonel Sheppard to all military personnel remaining in the gate room. By order of Colonel Caldwell, you are to stand down _immediately_."

_Caldwell…? He's part of this? How is that…?_

The questions had barely time to take root in Shen's mind before Sheppard continued in a low, cold voice that carried into the entire room.

"Failure to comply and you'll face a court-martial for treason."

There was a split second where Shen could see the doubt in the SOs' expressions. Just a second. Then, without question, without looking to her for orders at all, the remaining soldiers in the operations centre put down their weapons.

At the _clatter_ of the stun weapons dropped to the ground, Sheppard popped his head out of cover. Seeing the coast was clear, he stepped out entirely, his stun weapon raised towards the two surrendering SOs with eagle-eyed precision.

"Step away. Drop your vests as well," Sheppard said, descending the staircase. His posture was tall, strong, and powerful. Behind him, the rest of his four-man team followed.

Shen could do nothing. Nothing but stare as Sheppard reached the operations centre level, kicked away the dropped stun weapons, and then gestured for Ronon to watch over the two SOs.

Slowly and with deliberation, Sheppard's eyes met hers as he spoke to his team. "Nelson, Ramirez. Please escort Miss Xiaoyi, Mr Woolsey, Mr Samson, Miss Vygotsky and Mr Shang to the conference room. Stun them if necessary."

Shen's mouth opened in protest, but Sheppard had already turned to the two unarmed SOs and was now ignoring her completely. "Michaels, Erwine, start ferrying bodies. There are eight of them upstairs, stunned. Put them down in the gateroom and keep a watch on them until you're relieved."

The soldiers in question nodded curtly and did as ordered, disappearing up the staircase moments later. Two of the men that'd followed Sheppard – Ramirez and Nelson – had stepped into the console area and was half-pulling the selected technicians from their seats. Only Woolsey seemed to remain relatively calm, though he walked behind them willingly. Shen observed it all with a plummeting feeling of anger, frustration and defeat.

"Matthews and Ronon. Go down and let Lorne's men inside. Remind anyone that the consequences of not following orders will _not_ be pleasant," Sheppard added darkly, before the two he'd addressed left down the back staircase.

"Rodney." He turned next to the Canadian scientist, who sat open-mouthed like a blowfish, staring at the activity around him. "Dial Tirana. Colonel Carter's got a plan to get us out of this clusterfuck."

* * *

There wasn't any moment to spare for the unconscious Dawkins being carried down the grand staircase, for the guilt that accompanied the sight of soldiers guarding soldiers, or for the nagging truth that she'd actually planned for this kind of event. As soon as she'd gotten her bearings, Sam strode up to the operations centre level where John stood talking to Rodney and Zelenka.

"Colonel," John greeted when he caught sight of her, his expression grim. "Command is yours."

Those three loaded words hit her harder than she'd care to admit. She could tell by the look in John's eyes that he knew that. This wasn't a moment to celebrate, however, or for second-guessing themselves. What was done was done.

"Where are they?" Forcing her uneasiness aside, Sam glanced around the operations centre.

"In there." John gestured in the direction of the conference room, where Matthews stood talking to Ramirez and Nelson outside the closed doors. "Want me to fetch them?"

"Yes, thank you." As he left, Sam glanced back at Hailey, who'd followed her up the stairs and held a medium-sized container in her hands. "Captain, hook up the device and start reconfiguring the transmitters. McKay and Zelenka can help you."

"Yes, ma'am." There was no hint of Hailey's customary cockiness – the way she usually handled pressure in a combat situation – but Sam couldn't think about that now. There wasn't time. Maybe afterwards, when things had cooled down. If they survived this…

"Um… what's going on, exactly?" Behind the power control console, Rodney gave Sam a confused look. "John said something about you having a plan…"

"I'll explain it later, Rodney. For now, Hailey will tell you what needs to be done. I've got to deal with some administrative issues." At that, Sam turned back towards the conference room. The doors were open now, with Matthews and the two sergeants on alert. John exited moments later, Xiaoyi and Woolsey in tow.

The moment Xiaoyi spotted Sam, her eyes glinted angrily and her lips pressed together. Woolsey, on the other hand, displayed no outward reaction.

"Miss Xiaoyi, Mr Woolsey," Sam greeted them, straightening her spine, and mustered as much willpower and confidence as she could. "I'm sorry this had to happen."

Xiaoyi said nothing.

Sam bit back her immediate annoyance and turned to Woolsey instead. "I've implemented Martial Law until the situation is under control, of which I will then return command to the IOA."

Xiaoyi scoffed, and Sam narrowed her eyes at the Chinese woman. "You wished to say something, Miss Xiaoyi?"

"Spare me your false righteousness, Colonel." The woman's eyes were icy cold, yet her voice was full of heat. "You placed that so-called 'failsafe'. You meant to sabotage our plan from the start."

Sam raised an eyebrow, for a moment surprised at the woman's accusation, before realising she should've expected it. Whenever things went wrong, Xiaoyi seemed to blame her.

Reigning in her immediate irritation, Sam said, "I had no idea you were planning to use the Wormhole Drive. If there's a failsafe, my guess would be that one of the Ancients on the original project is behind it." She folded her arms across her chest, eyes narrowing and her tone dropping to a low note. "Besides, you might want to consider choosing your words more carefully. _I_ am not the one who put Atlantis in its current position."

A shadow crossed Xiaoyi's face and the coldness in her eyes turned icier. Before she could respond, however, Woolsey spoke up.

"She is right, Shen." His expression was hard. "You made this decision on your own without consulting the council. When things have calmed down, there _will_ be consequences."

The only response Xiaoyi gave was a cool stare in Woolsey's direction. The two eyed each other for a long, drawn-out tense moment before the former looked away from all of them.

Sam turned to John. "Colonel, please escort Miss Xiaoyi back to the conference room. She will remain there until this crisis has passed."

John nodded curtly and gave Xiaoyi a pointed stare. The woman offered no resistance. Assuming what had to be a second skin to her by now – the quiet, cold yet straight-backed manner – she walked ahead of him to the conference room.

In their wake, Sam turned to Woolsey with a critical look. He met her eyes with a raised eyebrow. "Whatever you've been working on in the caves on Tirana, Colonel, I hope it will 'pack a punch', as they say."

"You knew?" Sam frowned, suddenly edgy.

Woolsey smirked. "Please, Colonel. Although I haven't seen fieldwork since the NID, I like to think that I still have the ability to find out a thing or two. Besides, I have followed your work for nearly a decade. We have not always seen eye to eye, but ever since that experience at the Gamma Site research station with you and Captain Hailey – the aggressive insects? – I knew you two would try to find a solution to the greater issue at stake: the Wraith threat."

Unexpectedly, Sam smirked back. It distinctly felt as if she'd just earned a stamp of approval and she couldn't detect anything with her bullshit detector.

Before she could think of anything to say, however, John had returned. "What's next?"

"Did you release the quarantine?" Sam asked, turning towards the operations centre. Both John and Woolsey followed, the latter somewhat hesitantly.

John eyed the IOA representative, but didn't comment. "Not yet. Didn't know whether to expect a counter-attack or not."

"All right. Well, you better head down to the ZPM room and back fast. Larrin won't wait forever."

"Right." There was a silent groan in that single word, but John left without further ado, taking some of Lorne's men with him.

Although Woolsey frowned questioningly at her, Sam ignored him for now. "Dr Zelenka, would you open a city-wide channel, please." She paused in front of the Czech's console and touched her earpiece radio at his 'ready' signal. "Attention, all personnel. This is Colonel Carter. I am, as of this moment, taking command of the city. All military units are ordered to stand down. Fail to comply, and you will be taken into custody and face a court martial."

She paused, meeting Woolsey's eyes. "Should any civilian decide to disobey my command, consider this: As I speak, the Wraith superhive is headed this way and our defences are limited. If we work together, however, we may still have a chance."

"Colonel, if I may?" Woolsey gestured to the radio. Sam considered it for a moment, then nodded. Zelenka handed him a second earpiece radio and Woolsey attached it to his ear. "All civilian personnel, this is Mr Woolsey. Colonel Carter is acting with both Miss Xiaoyi's blessing and mine. Please follow her orders. Any complaints may be filed with my office once this ordeal is over."

Smirking slightly, Sam nodded her thanks as Woolsey stepped back. Then, she stared at Hailey and Rodney, who were connecting the controller part of the Ascalon to the main control console. "For those in doubt, I know that we have had our asses kicked by the superhive before… But that's in the past. For the past six months, my people and I have developed a weapon powerful enough to take down the superhive. It's being brought here by _Daedalus_ and will be here within hours." She paused. " _This time_ , we'll turn the ass-kicking on the Wraith instead. But to do that, I require each and every one of you to do your jobs. Detailed instructions will be sent out to all department heads momentarily. Meanwhile, I am releasing the quarantine. All non-essential personnel are asked to remain in their assigned areas. Everyone else return to their duties and prepare for battle."

At Sam's signal, Zelenka closed the radio channel. To the side, Woolsey stared at her. "Now what?"

"How far off is that Hive ship?"

"Less than two hours," Zelenka supplied, looking up from his computer screen. "Long-range sensors are detecting more Hive ships breaking away from the main battle. Some of them are headed here. Others seem to be retreating."

Sam's jaw clenched. "So now the Great Eye has turned on us. Hailey?"

"Calibrating the transmitter will take about thirty minutes," Hailey said without looking up from her work. "Disabling the stargate should take five."

"Disabling it?" Hesitating, Rodney frowned. "Why would we…?"

Sam smiled. "Because we'll not be using it, Rodney."

* * *

Larrin tapped her foot against the _Vestige's_ hangar bay floor. Five metres away, the Atlantis puddle jumper set down, windshield facing away from her. The moment the back hatch opened and hit the metallic floor, she snapped. "You're late!"

"Relax, will you? You'll pop a vein." Carrying a small container under his arm, Sheppard stepped out of the Jumper and strode towards her. "Haven't got time for that."

"Just give me that." She grabbed the container from him and threw it off to one of her waiting technicians. The young teenager ran off immediately. Larrin turned to Sheppard, her expression tense. "The fleet's already left."

"Once that ZPM's installed, we'll catch up. That's not our main problem." Sheppard gave her a pointed stare. "You just make sure that dyson ring holds up, or we can kiss everything _sayonara_."

* * *

"Hyperspace window opening!" Back in her old seat, Alicia Banks' shout roused the jittery operations centre.

Having paced on the operations centre balcony, Sam immediately spun on her heel and faced the wall-mounted screen. On the sensor map, a large red dot appeared tagged as TARGET-1. At the far end, still some distance away, a blue dot carrying _Daedalus'_ IFF signal was speeding towards them at high ZPM-powered velocity.

"Raise shields." Touching her earpiece radio, Sam addressed Alicia Vega, their stand-in for John in the control chair. "Captain, prepare the drones, but hold them back until I give the order."

" _Aye, ma'am."_

"The Hive ship's opening fire," Banks reported. "One minute to impact."

Recalling the devastating attacks the superhive was capable of, Sam gestured to Zelenka, who opened a city-wide channel. "All hands, brace for impact."

She followed her own suggestion, stepping forward to hold onto Zelenka's console. Moments later, the ground lurched beneath her. She clung on, knuckles whitening, but frowned as the first impacts stopped a minute afterwards.

"Rodney?"

He seemed to understand her underlying confusion. "Shields are holding at 79%. Even if we take our upgrades into account, those weapons didn't pack nearly as much power as the ones we've faced before. Last time, they bled our shields dry with just three salvoes."

"Confirm target," Sam ordered immediately. "Give me the run-down, Banks."

"Target's certainly larger than the ordinary Hive ships, but it doesn't match the specifications we have on file for the superhive. It's smaller by comparison. I'm still not detecting any ZPM subspace signal, even if the ship is displaying considerable energy levels."

"It could be running on a single ZedPM, which would explain the size and why it remained relatively undetected," Rodney hypothesised. "Could also be it's suffering from hyperspace radiation. It didn't stop to regenerate."

Sam frowned. "But even if they poured additional power into regeneration, their weapons would still be stronger than an ordinary Hive ship. I'm thinking we're dealing with some sort of mini-superhive. It's the only thing—"

"Second volley incoming!"

The time between Banks' warning and the impacts had shortened. The jolts were also stronger and the attack lasted longer. Clinging on to the console with both hands, Sam glanced over at the wall-mounted screen. _Daedalus_ was getting closer, but was still too far away to make an immediate difference.

"Vega," Sam yelled into her radio above the sound of continued impacts. "Weapons free."

_"Aye, aye, ma'am. Bringing in the rain."_

The screen lit up with tiny specks bursting outwards from the blue dot that indicated Atlantis. They surged towards the mini-superhive and Sam wished she could've been outside to watch the real thing. Instead, the specks' impact on the large red dot tagged TARGET-1 were just flickers on the screen. One moment they were there, the next they were gone.

The Wraith barrage stopped, and Sam took that as a good sign. "Damage?"

"Enemy ship hull is down by 22% in target areas," Banks reported. "They're already regenerating, but it's slower than the superhive's proven capabilities."

"It's gotta be the hyperspace radiation." Rodney grinned. "It's weakened their ability to regenerate. And if they're only running on a single ZedPM, they'll have to prioritise. Obviously, they'll choose regeneration because they've got such a great sense of self-preservation, but this is great! We can actually win this."

Sam shot him a look of warning, but Banks cut in before she could comment further: "They're amassing huge amounts of power in the starboard weapons arrays. Output's more than 200% than before."

The information made Sam go rigid. They'd always assumed the superhive possessed some kind of superweapon of its own, given that it'd completely eradicated entire colonies.

"Rodney, pull everything we've got into shields," she ordered, just as Banks called out, "Third barrage incoming!"

The response time was yet again cut in half. Before Sam managed to grab onto the console in front of her, the Wraith weapons hit Atlantis and she crashed hard into the ground.

After a moment that felt like eternity, she emerged from a fuzzy darkness to the sound of klaxons and the smell of burning electrics. All around her, people were getting back on their feet or into their seats.

Struggling to her feet, head aching, she called out, "Damage report!"

Rodney responded first, adjusting his seat and dismissively wiping away blood that'd started running down his face from a cut below the hairline. "Shields are still holding, but they're down to 32%. That last hit overloaded some of the primary conductors, but the secondary are already taking the pressure off them."

"Wraith ship is standing by," Banks said as she pushed back some loose strands of hair that'd sprung free. "They've refocused their energy on regenerating the hull. Regeneration speed is up by 20%."

"Vega." Sam turned on her earpiece radio. "Fire another volley of drones. We need to halt that regeneration until _Daedalus_ gets here. Choose your targets wisely."

_"Aye, ma'am. Volley coming up."_

* * *

On the quiet bridge, Mark's voice was steady. "Exiting hyperspace in 3-2-1…"

For a second, _Daedalus_ was locked in the disorienting feel of being stuck between two different spheres. Then, the outside view normalised and Caldwell could see both targets lit up on the Heads-Up Display. He frowned as he saw Atlantis's yellow shield had shrunk slightly and some of its outer towers were on fire. Some distance away, the Wraith ship simply hovered menacingly.

"Status," he barked.

"Wraith Hive ship is regenerating," Telman reported from the tactical sensor console. "Wait – they're powering up port weapons. Seems like they've spotted us."

"Major." Caldwell turned to Marks. "Take us in. Fire at will."

Marks nodded curtly. "Aye, sir. We're going in. Asgard plasma beam weapons at the ready."

Just as the Wraith ship opened fire, _Daedalus_ tilted and swerved out of the way. Picking up speed, Marks steered the ship skilfully between the plasma shots and out of range. More weapons arrays opened fire from the Hive ship, unleashing a blue hailstorm that lit up the darkness of space. Dodging it forever would be impossible, but they needed to buy time.

Caldwell turned to the communications officer. "Contact Atlantis."

Carter's response was swift. _"_ Daedalus _, you're a Godsend. Our shields were starting to show signs of strain. Another hit and we'd be forced into the atmosphere."_

"Yeah, I can see that. How long until your drives are back online?" Having received updates on the subspace channel, Caldwell cut right to the crux of the matter.

" _Unknown. McKay's people are working as fast as possible. Maybe be an hour, perhaps even a day. The overheating from the Wormhole Drive really did a number on the drives."_

The ship jolted from several impacts, but a glance at Marks told Caldwell that the shields were holding strong; they were just stray shots. He cued on the radio to Atlantis. "Any remaining drones? We will need cover in order to beam out the stargate satellite."

 _"Hold on…"_ There was a pause as Carter conferred with her people. _"We have enough for a last barrage. Stand by."_

Caldwell turned to the bridge in general. "All right, people. You know the drill. Wait until Atlantis unleashes the drones, then proceed with the plan."

A chorus of "aye, sir" sounded around him as Marks continued to guide _Daedalus_ through the hailstorm, careful to keep the directed Wraith plasma fire away from the city.

"Atlantis is firing drones," Telman reported. "Wraith ship is powering down starboard weapons array. Regeneration speed is up by 10 %."

"Marks," Caldwell gestured to the now barren part of the hailstorm, and Marks responded quickly.

The ship soared between remaining plasma shots, unable to dodge a few shots that made the ship jolt, but nevertheless making it to the open space without major incident.

In quick succession, the shields powered down, and the stargate satellite was beamed out in front of the ship. Shields were raised again and Marks fired off a couple of Asgard plasma beams for good measure.

The white streams of light tore into the superhive's hull, resulting in immediate explosions around the impact site, but overall nothing more than slight indents in its armor. The hull was soon regenerating again, plugging the leaking holes with dark purple organic matter that merged with the seams.

Not surprised by the limited damage they did, Caldwell addressed Marks. "Take up a defensive position between the stargate satellite and the superhive. Protect it at all costs."

* * *

"We have a connection, Colonel. All levels are green." Seated behind the main control console, Hailey focused on the information pouring into her computer screen. The shield around the stargate satellite was raised to protect it from whatever shots _Daedalus_ couldn't intercept, and the thrusters responded well to her commands. They were all set for the next step. "I'm dialling the Travelers."

"The Travelers?"

Somewhere in the periphery of Hailey's hearing range, Woolsey sounded dubious. She ignored him in favour of punching the buttons on her console, filling up the seven empty boxes on her computer screen with Pegasus coordinates. Down in the gate room, the Atlantis stargate was silent, having been disabled so that any incoming calls would go to the stargate satellite instead.

"Yes, they're on our side." Carter sounded slightly dismissive. However, she seemed to notice and corrected in a more polite tone, "I'll tell you about it later."

The screen in front of Hailey lit up. "Event horizon stabilised."

"Hey, that looks like Asuran design," McKay commented, pointing to Hailey's screen where the stargate satellite was displayed. "Is that—"

"Based on the Asuran stargate satellite designs you logged," Hailey said immediately, "only with upgrades."

She ran her fingers over the keyboard, glancing at the small video feed in the corner where she could see _Daedalus_ hovering between the camera and the large, hulking Wraith ship. Their shields lit up on occasion from blue plasma shots, but they didn't move. She stood ready to move the stargate satellite if necessary.

"Open a channel." Carter came to stand in front of the communications console next to Hailey, where Zelenka jumped into action. On his signal, she touched her earpiece radio. "Traveler ship _Hylea,_ this is Atlantis. Start the beam in 90 seconds on my mark."

" _This is_ Hylea _, we are ready."_

"Good." Carter smiled briefly. "Mark."

As soon as the word escaped the colonel's mouth, Hailey waited two seconds and then closed down the stargate. With a bated breath, she waited, staring at the screen until… "Incoming wormhole."

"Signal _Daedalus_ and move the satellite into position," Carter ordered. "Let's take this home."

* * *

As soon as Atlantis' signal came through, Marks fired off a final round of Asgard beam weapons at the Wraith ship's closest weapons array and then kick-started the sublight engines. On the Heads Up Display the timer was quickly going down from 90 and he knew they only had a matter of seconds.

Cooper's navigational calculations fed into his screen and Marks used a quick burst of power to speed away from their previous position. The ship shook under the impacts of continued plasma shots. In the periphery, he heard Telman report that the superhive's fire had shifted towards the stargate satellite instead, and he allowed himself a split second to hope that its shield and ability to move would continue to hold.

Sweat ran down the back of his neck. The timer continued to go down. At the same time, Marks counted the distance. _Daedalus_ continued to pick up speed.

"20 seconds," Telman called out.

"This is it, people." Amidst the jolts from enemy fire and the sound of damaged equipment, Caldwell's voice was calm. "Brace for impact."

"10 seconds."

They'd reached a relative safe distance. Marks turned the ship around, not about to let the moment pass with only the computer data to record it.

Barely visible at this distance, the stargate satellite danced almost effortlessly away from the concentrated fire from the superhive, its blue event horizon almost indistinguishable from the plasma shots. Marks could see it turn and position itself…

And then a large, bright yellow-white beam burst out of the darkness. It pierced the blue plasma shots, the wide-open dark spaces in-between, and drilled into the purplish hull of the superhive's aft section.

For a moment, Marks held his breath, stunned. Then, the yellow-white beam tore through on the other side of the superhive, very close to the engines, and multiple red-yellow explosions erupted all over the ship's aft and midsection. Small at first, then growing in size and scope, snowballing from one to another until whole sections of the ship began to break apart.

The ship's weapon fire stopped. Readings said the regeneration speed had increased, but it was pointless. The stargate satellite shifted, running its yellow-white beam across the length of the ship like knife to cheese.

And then the beam stopped. But the explosions didn't.

Within seconds, the superhive was nothing more than slivers and chunks of debris…and Marks released a long, deep breath from the pit of his stomach.

* * *

The relief was palatable. The heavy, oppressive atmosphere of before had gone, dispelled with the sudden bouts of cheers and laughs and tears that filled the operations centre for the next few minutes. For some, it started immediately. For others, it started with a smile that grew into a chuckle that became a full-blown laugh.

Woolsey found himself smiling too. The visible joy and relief around him was contagious. He basked in it, and ultimately couldn't help but compare it to their last encounter with the superhive. This was ten times better, if only for the long-sought sense of finality it brought.

"Wow, Sam. I knew you'd blown up a star and all but… Remind me never to piss you off." McKay's stunned expression seemed as apt as the laughter and tears.

Leaning against the console next to him, Carter chuckled, her face looking ten years younger. The sight made Woolsey's smile widen.

He approached her as she broke away for a moment to catch her breath. "Congratulations on a job well done, Colonel."

Carter smiled. "Thank you, Mr Woolsey. This is… is…"

"…the closure we've been waiting for," Woolsey suggested. The thankful look in Carter's eyes told him he'd said the right thing. "I'm sure everyone will be pleased to hear the news."

Nodding, Carter turned to Zelenka at the communications console. "Radek, please open a city-wide channel."

"One channel coming up—"

_Blip._

"Ma'am!" Banks' panicked voice burst through the buzz of chatter and laughs. Everything stopped in its tracks as Carter and Woolsey both turned to the female technician. Her eyes were wide with shock. "A ZPM subspace signal just appeared on sensors. It's… it's headed here."

Slowly, his gut clenched, Woolsey turned to Carter. "There's more than one?"

Carter's eyes narrowed, but she remained frozen for only a second. With a grim tone, she turned to the technicians.

"Battle stations."

* * *

 **Next:** "We're done running."

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GLOSSARY
> 
> (1) 我想回家 = I want to go home


	26. DAY 308 (Part 3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "We cannot be sure of having something to live for unless we are willing to die for it." - Ernesto Guevara

_**** _

* * *

**TWENTY-THREE, PART THREE | "We're done running."**

_Music:_ "Robin Speaks" by Marc Streitenfield _(Robin Hood); "_ The Night is Dark" and "You Know Nothing" by Ramin Djawadi _(Game of Thrones: Season 3);_ "Way of Life" by Hans Zimmer _(The Last Samurai);_ "Exit" by Sam Hulick, Richard Jacques & Jack Wall _(Mass Effect)_

* * *

"We cannot be sure of having something to live for unless we are willing to die for it."

― **Ernesto Guevara**

* * *

**DAY 308**

Nobody smiled anymore. Discipline had taken over. In the Operations Centre, the technicians worked without pause trying to restore Atlantis' drives. Down in the gate room, the soldiers were growing restless. Reese could see it in both their twitches and their rigidness.

Those who'd been stunned in the assault earlier now sat lined up against the wall, under guard by Major Lorne and his men. Others paced slowly back and forth, or gathered in small groups where the laughter sounded forced, but was just a way to pass time.

She'd heard of the tension up here during Atlantis' previous bouts with the superhive. She'd never seen it up close, though, or tasted it herself. During the last times she'd been down in barracks, feeling useless and restless while waiting for news, but at the same time able to ignore what was going on much more than she could here now. Proximity: it could be a curse or a blessing.

"Think they'll come up with a plan?" Sergeant Nelson leaned against the wall outside the conference room, his eyes sharp and focused. It was a change from earlier, Reese noticed.

"Maybe." She shifted on her feet and followed his line of sight to the glass office at the other end of the gate room. The blinds were half-closed, but still able to reveal the people inside: Carter, Woolsey, McKay, Lorne and Hailey. Reese looked back at Nelson. "It wouldn't be the first time."

"Still, taking down one superhive is a bloody miracle." Nelson paused, then muttered, "Two is a fucking pipe dream."

Unable to come up with a fitting response, mostly because she agreed, Reese glanced at Ramirez. He stood quietly against the conference room door, eyes set distantly on the floor. He hadn't said a word yet. Not even an apology. It was starting to grate at her nerves, especially now that things had calmed down – for their part.

Her hands clenched. "I'm taking a walk. See if I can scrounge up some rations."

"Aye, aye, Captain," said Nelson, straightening slightly in his spot.

Ramirez, on the other hand, remained motionless…until she noticed him following her with his eyes down the grand staircase and out of sight. There was a whole lifetime in those eyes. They haunted her.

* * *

Perched on the edge of Xiaoyi's desk, Sam idly noticed Matthews descending the grand staircase, before tuning back to what Rodney was saying.

"— it's the only option that makes sense. Submerging the city will hopefully bleed off whatever the Wraith throw at us while we wait for the cavalry."

Standing with his arms crossed, Woolsey looked to her for confirmation.

Sam nodded. "It's worked in the past with the Asuran stargate satellite."

"Except the superhive's capable of destroying entire settlements and turn the ground into molten rock," Hailey added tonelessly. "By comparison, it's ten times more lethal than the Asuran plasma beam."

"So we'll boil?" Lorne raised an eyebrow. Sam could see the scepticism on his face, but knew he was too much of a professional to let that affect him negatively.

"If the shields fail: like lobsters," Rodney said, unenthused. " _And_ we'll turn the ocean into a radioactive hotspot. Give it a few months, and we'll start reeling in gigantic aquatic life forms."

"We can't help it." To the side, Sam could see Woolsey frown at her words, but thankfully he didn't protest. This really wasn't the time to have environmental concerns, even if they were valid. The needs of _us_ outnumbered the needs of _them._ "With the Ascalon's power source burnt out, we're going to have to buy all the time we need. The Traveler fleet won't be here for at least four hours."

It was their only true hope. The dyson ring had already been a gamble due to a few faulty satellites that could break the conductive chain if they failed, and now it was down. According to the Travelers, it could be brought back online eventually, but it required the one factor they lacked: time.

"The Wraith ship will be here in less than one hour," Hailey said, again in that toneless voice that'd become like a second skin to her in the past few weeks. While she maintained a keen mind, her eyes had grown duller and less present than before. It made Sam's stomach churn uneasily.

_When this is over…_

"Even if we are able to hold out that long…" Rodney paused, clearly unconvinced. "… Sam, no matter how many generational ships you've managed to persuade to come, they won't make much of a difference against the superhive. Their combat capabilities—"

"— are better than they were," Sam interjected, having anticipated his reaction. "We've helped them upgrade shields and weapons. I know it might not be enough, but they're coming here primarily to give cover to _Daedalus_ and _Vestige_ , their Ancient Aurora-class battleship. It's been outfitted with Asgard shields, railguns and nuclear missiles. The Travelers are also in possession of drone weapons."

Rodney's mouth formed an 'O'. Next to him, Hailey smirked slightly and said, "They should be able to do some damage."

" _Some_ damage," Woolsey noted with a frown.

Sam sighed. "Yeah. _Some_ damage. We have no idea yet what this Wraith ship will be like besides being powered by at least two ZPMs. If we're lucky, it's only just now been outfitted with a second one and won't have had time to grow by the time it gets here."

"And if we're unlucky?" The question had to be asked, Sam supposed. Still, she hated it.

"Then the previous superhive we encountered was just the little brother, and this is the superhive we've been acquainted with in the past." She paused, giving everyone in the room time to digest that possibility. It didn't take long. "Rodney, we're going to need alternatives. You've got less than an hour. In the meantime, put Zelenka in charge of getting the drives back online."

* * *

"What's your status?" Hunched in front of the console, Caldwell stared at the video feed of Carter in Atlantis' Operations Centre. In the background, the technicians were deeply immersed in their work.

" _All non-essential personnel have been evacuated to Tirana. But still no stardrive."_ Carter's expression was tense as she brushed a stray lock of hair from her face. " _I'm considering sending everyone out to push."_ She sighed. " _How about you?"_

Caldwell cast a glance at his bridge crew, who were involved in everything from basic repairs to calculating the upcoming battle. "We're still operational. Some systems were more affected than others, but all in all, we got out of this mostly in one piece."

He still couldn't believe that, considering their past encounters with a Wraith superhive, and it almost made him wonder if there weren't some higher power looking out for them… But then again, this ship had been different. Weaker in a way, which lent credence to the hypothesis he and Carter had formed that the superhive had cut down to a single ZPM two months ago to avoid showing up on long-range sensors.

 _Except now there's a second Hive ship that's stopped using that tactic,_ Caldwell mused. _Guess the Ascalon drew their attention._

He turned his focus back on Carter. "We will provide cover for you as long as needed."

Carter nodded, although he could see she wasn't happy with that idea. _"Let's hope it won't be long."_ She paused and sighed heavily, pinching the ridge of her nose before looking up again. _"Are your transporters back online? I would like to move the stargate satellite inside the city. We might be needing it later if we survive this."_

"Give us the destination coordinates and we'll have it done as soon as possible." Caldwell paused as Carter gestured for someone outside the screen, then looked down when his console beeped. The coordinates appeared on a separate screen, and he transferred them to Telman's console.

" _Hold on. The Travelers just checked in."_ Carter reached out for a tablet that someone gave her, then spent a moment surveying it while biting her lip. _"Looks like they're on schedule, at least. The first ships will reach the rendezvous site in twenty minutes. The_ Vestige _is about forty-five minutes behind them. Once it's there, they'll make a coordinated jump to this location."_

"What about the Wraith?" With the superhive's improved long-range sensors, Caldwell suspected it might be able to penetrate subspace and detect the approaching Traveler ships. However, they'd had no proof of this yet, nor did they know what the Wraith might do if they detected Atlantis' cavalry.

Carter understood his unspoken concerns. _"The superhive's still on course. Two more Hive ships are trying to follow in its wake, but they're at least a day behind and that gap will widen once the superhive picks up speed. No sign that they're veering off for the Travelers."_

"Might be best to give the Travelers a head's up nevertheless," Caldwell said. After all, the fleet was their only hope right now unless they managed to come up with something else.

* * *

"You're crazy." McKay was staring at her as if she'd grown an extra head. They were in his lab, surrounded by a few others but left very much to their own devices.

"You have a better idea?" Annoyed, Hailey refocused on her computer screen. It displayed a large schematic of an ordinary Hive ship's interior. She figured that even with the size difference, the layout on board the superhive would be pretty much the same. "Look, they don't have shields, so if we could transport the stargate inside its hull – let's say here," she pointed to a spot on the schematic close to the engines, "and strap a nuke to it, the detonation should be enough to tear it to pieces."

"Besides the incredibly precise calculations required for such an operation, _how_ exactly do you propose _Daedalus_ find a spare moment in the battle to drop shields and execute the transport?" Beginning to pace, McKay threw his hands up in incredulity. " _They're_ going to be torn to pieces before they have a chance to say 'make it so'."

"They could do it just as the ship exits hyperspace," Hailey said. "There will be a gap between the superhive's exit and the moment it's able to fire weapons. We could use that."

"Maybe, if we had a live Asgard on board _Daedalus_ capable of making that precise calculation in less than five seconds." McKay paused, eyeing her disapprovingly. "You've watched too much Star Trek."

Hailey blew an annoyed breath. "Fine. But it's still an option if _Daedalus_ is able to find a gap in the battle long enough to see it through. If the other ships ran cover in the meantime…"

"They're not going to last long, but yeah, it could happen." Still not looking entirely convinced but getting there, McKay stopped and turned fully towards her. "Okay, it's not like we have anything else, so let's try it."

He reached for his earpiece radio, presumably to report back to Carter, but was interrupted by the citywide speakers.

" _All hands, this is Colonel Carter. The Wraith ship's ETA is ten minutes. Report to battle stations."_

As the colonel's voice died down, McKay stared helplessly into the air. "But… we need more time."

"We'll have to make do." Picking up her tablet computer, Hailey grabbed hold of McKay's jacket and pulled him along. "Now, where do you store the nukes?"

* * *

Sam went to lean against the railing of the balcony overlooking the gate room. Woolsey was already there, staring down at the forty-odd soldiers still gathered around the stargate with an indecipherable expression.

"If we survive this…" she began.

Face grim, Woolsey nodded without looking at her. "I know." He glanced at the closed conference room doors. "There will be changes."

"Good." Sam straightened, glancing towards the wall-mounted screen in the Operations Centre. The red dot on the sensor map – TARGET-2 – was just about to reach them. "It's time."

Although she expected him to follow her, Woolsey remained at the balcony while Sam approached Chuck, who was back at his usual spot behind the main control console. "Raise shields."

"Aye, ma'am." Chuck touched a sequence of buttons, and the only sign that the shields were up was the dip in power levels displayed on his computer screen.

They'd kept the shields off until now to save power for the descent unto the planet. They'd also reconnected the stargate so that they had an escape plan if everything went to hell. But they were done running. This was their home and they were going to defend it tooth and nail until they were out of options.

"Signal the fleet that we are about to be engaged. Then go to radio silence," Sam said. In the slightest hope that the superhive had _not_ picked up the Traveler fleet on sensors, radio silence would keep the Wraith from learning about them, or at least their battle strategy. She then turned to Zelenka, seated behind another console. "Doctor, let me know the _second_ drives are back online."

"Y-yes." Zelenka pushed his glasses further up the ridge of his nose. "We're running another test shortly. Should give us a better estimate."

Sam opened her mouth to comment on it, then refrained. She knew they were doing the best they could. They didn't need further badgering or reminders about time being of the essence.

Instead, she nodded curtly. "Good."

"Hyperspace window is opening," Banks reported aloud, drawing everyone's attention.

Sam's eyes swerved back to the wall-mounted screen where TARGET-2 came to a sudden halt, approximately 10,000 kilometres away from Atlantis. The blue dot signalling _Daedalus_ immediately moved into position between them.

* * *

The Wraith Hive ship was considerably larger than the one they'd destroyed earlier, yet still not fitting entirely to the specifications of the superhive they'd both hunted and been hunted by for the past nine months.

 _But it still supports our hypothesis on the superhive attempting sensor camouflage. Going from several to one ZPM would decrease its size since it wouldn't have enough power to sustain its previous mass._ Caldwell's hands tightened slightly around the armrests. _This one's larger than the last one, though, and it hasn't been equipped with multiple ZPMs for more than a couple of hours. Perhaps the previous one was only outfitted with one ZPM all along, whereas this one…_

A knot tightened in the pit of Caldwell's stomach as he stared at the bulky ship on the HUD, coming to the only conclusion he could. "Hello, old friend."

"Regeneration speed is up by approximately 60 %. Hull shows considerable signs of radioactive damage from hyperspace travel," Telman reported from his station behind the Captain's chair. "I'm highlighting the weak spots on the HUD."

"Marks, fire at will. Give it everything we've got." Surveying the situation, Caldwell knew that halting the ship's regeneration immediately was vital, even if it meant expending their armaments sooner rather than later. Plus, they needed to take advantage of the lull before the Wraith fired back. Although not really necessary, he added, "Target the weak spots."

There was a barely perceptible ripple in his chair as Marks fired off two consecutive Asgard plasma beams, followed by four nuclear missiles. They all soared across the debris-laden field, carefully targeted so as not to be interrupted by debris, and then dug into the Wraith ship's hull. Explosions occurred around the impact point, branching out along the hull in a cluster network of secondary detonations.

Telman spoke up immediately. "They're relocating power to impact site. Other weak spots have reduced regeneration speed."

"Again," Caldwell ordered.

Marks followed up with another shot of the Asgard plasma beam weapons, hitting a separate weak spot. More explosions, more ripples, and another report from Telman that regeneration was speeding up in the new impact area.

"Again."

Marks complied. Same procedure. Same reports.

By now, Caldwell started to frown. Why didn't the ship fire back? Had the Wraith battle damaged them more than outward appearance let on? Were they still letting the additional ZPM or ZPMs fulfil their purpose, which was growing and expanding the organic hull and armaments? They couldn't possibly know the Ascalon was inoperative, so what was it?

Before he had a chance to evaluate the probabilities, Telman called out, "Sir, multiple targets on sensors! They've launched Wraith darts."

Caldwell reached for the internal communication button, prepared to call Titan wing into action—

"Massive energy build-up!" Telman reported, his voice rising in volume. "Regeneration is put on halt."

Caldwell changed tactics. "Major, fire off another shot and prepare to pour everything into shields—"

"Incoming fire from Wraith darts," another of the science officers called out. "They're swarming the debris field."

Keying his internal comms, Caldwell shouted towards the microphone. "All hands, brace for impact!"

Moments later, the ship jolted from the combined fire from the Wraith darts. They didn't make nearly as much of an impact as a Hive ship's weaponry, but their continued fire could nevertheless drain the shields.

"Railguns!" Eying the HUD, Caldwell watched the nearly hundred Wraith darts spread out between _Daedalus_ and the superhive, and then start being picked off by Marks' targeted railguns. They were holding a covering position, which would ordinarily be the cruisers' task, except there weren't any here. Still, they were no match for _Daedalus'_ weaponry, so why…?

"Hive ship's opening fire, starboard battery! Energy readouts project the yield at 9 gigatons." Telman paused, his voice intensifying. "That's approximate to a Mark IX, sir."

A yield like that could potentially bleed their shields dry in seconds, perhaps even with a ZPM connected. Caldwell's hands tightened around the armrests. "Brace for impact and prepare to return fire."

No one questioned him. They set to work while Caldwell stared at the HUD, where the Wraith plasma shots soared towards them, tearing through Wraith darts and debris like they were no hindrance at all.

Then things blacked out for a moment. Caldwell was thrown out of his chair, unable to hold on during the barrage onslaught.

He struggled back on his feet, electrical fires bursting out all over the bridge, the smell acrid in his nostrils. He coughed. "Status!"

"Shields are down to 25 %!" Marks reported, coughing too. "Multiple hull fractures. Some are venting atmosphere."

"Evacuate the adjoining compartments and seal them off," Caldwell ordered, setting his eyes on the HUD once more. The darts were regrouping as the superhive shifted position, turning its broadside away from _Daedalus_ to make a smaller target.

"Hive ship is regenerating again," Telman reported. "Surviving Wraith darts are opening fire. Some are making a break for Atlantis."

With their weakened shields, even the darts' barrage could drain them dry if they could keep it up long enough. Caldwell gritted his teeth and began to say, "Return fire—"

"Sir, Atlantis just transmitted a message," the communications officer called out above the general chatter and noise. "Drives are back online and they're going to land on the planet momentarily."

The tension in his neck lessened for a second. Eying the barrage headed their way, Caldwell took a moment to think, then nodded and turned to Marks. "All power to shields. Hold position until they've landed, then take us out of here, Major. Do it in a disorderly fashion. Let the Wraith think they've scared us away."

Marks smirked slightly. "Yes, sir."

* * *

Having descended through the atmosphere and fended off Wraith darts at the same time, Atlantis finally hit the ocean floor with an abrupt jolt. Sam held on to one of the consoles, reminded once more that John wasn't in the control chair. He had a certain finesse that Vega lacked, at least at the moment.

" _Phew. Still in one piece, ma'am,"_ Vega reported over the radio. Sam couldn't help smirk slightly at the honest sound of relief in the captain's voice.

"Thank you, Captain. You may step down." She gave the silent technicians in the Operations Centre an acknowledging gaze. "We will take it from here."

" _Aye aye, ma'am. Vega out."_

As the radio disconnected, Sam addressed the room at large. "Keep the shields up. Report the moment the Wraith make a move and locate those Wraith darts that crashed onto the planet. I don't want any surprises. Also, monitor the Traveler fleet and let me know when they've joined up with _Daedalus._ "

The technicians all replied in the affirmative. Satisfied with that, Sam turned to Rodney and Hailey, who'd arrived earlier during Atlantis' descent. She gestured them towards the glass office, where Woolsey and Lorne were already seated.

Closing the wooden door for privacy, Sam eyed Rodney and Hailey critically. "So what did you come up with?"

"Originally, a 'gate buster' strapped onto a stargate and beamed inside the superhive by _Daedalus_ ," Rodney said. Sam raised an eyebrow, if nothing else impressed with their creativity. Rodney folded his arms tightly across his chest and glanced at Hailey with a hesitant expression. "But with their recent damages, they won't be able to hold out long enough without shields to manage that, so…" He paused and swallowed uncomfortably.

Hailey took over, her eyes tinged with a bit more emotion than earlier today. "We send in a Jumper carrying a couple of Mark IXs, and detonate them within the superhive."

Sam tensed, frowning. There were far more implications in their proposition than what was being said explicitly. For one, they knew the superhive possessed superior sensors; the attack on Kadara had proved it could detect invisible puddle jumpers. Which meant…

"A suicide run," Sam stated.

Hailey nodded. "The way I see it, it's our only option. Unless we leave the city behind and resettle somewhere else."

Crossing her arms, Sam's lips thinned. "We're not there yet."

"But… a suicide run?" To the side, Woolsey frowned deeply. Clearly, he wasn't rejecting the idea, which at least spoke well of his more pragmatic mind-set, but he wasn't convinced either.

Lorne looked up at Sam. As a fellow member of the military, he knew what the call to arms might and certainly could entail. She knew only too well; after all, she'd been part of some of those missions at the SGC. They'd never expected to return from the infiltration of Apophis' invasion fleet either, but they'd lucked out. Perhaps it could be done here as well.

"With the fleet running interference, an invisible Jumper could theoretically make it inside and back again," said Sam, addressing Woolsey. "The Mark IX can be detonated by remote control, or a timer if the Wraith are jamming transmissions." She paused, giving Rodney and Hailey a second look. "I don't like it either, but sometimes it's a necessary evil."

Woolsey sighed, running a hand across his now tired face. "I understand."

"One Jumper might not be enough, though," Rodney said quietly. His eyes were solemn, yet pained; undoubtedly knowing he was proposing an even greater tragedy. "You know, 'don't put all your eggs in one basket' sort of thing."

Sam closed her eyes briefly. He was, of course, right. It didn't make her task any less difficult to carry out. Ordering a few soldiers to a near-certain fatal mission was horrible, but even more…?

Sam sighed. "How many Jumpers do we have in the Bay?"

Rodney hesitated. "Enough to spare a couple, but it's not just that. We don't have enough Mark IXs to equip more than one Jumper."

"That's not a problem," Hailey interjected, meeting Sam's eyes. Tension lines appeared on the captain's face. "We have a deal with the Genii." She paused, eyes narrowing. "They owe us."

* * *

The throbbing hum was starting to grate on her nerves. It was the only sign they were currently under attack by the superhive apart from some science mumbo-jumbo on a computer screen that Reese didn't understand. She would've liked it better if there at least were some jolts to keep her mind and body busy, but the city's shields were too good for that. At least for now.

"Never thought I'd see that face again." Ramirez's mutter was low and tense. Startled, Reese stared at him, not having heard him say a word all day.

She followed his gaze down to the gate room where Commander Taron was exchanging a greeting with Carter, who didn't look entirely pleased with his presence either. She barely shook his outstretched hand and then introduced him to Woolsey, who stood next to her.

"Radim pardoned him," Reese explained curtly. She forgot about the hum for a moment, instead eying the large containers being wheeled to the side of the stargate platform by Genii soldiers. "Probably took pity on him for being used as a scapegoat by Rathorn."

Ramirez' eyes narrowed darkly. "Doesn't excuse his actions."

Reese agreed, but for some reason she couldn't bring herself to say it as he turned and resumed his position by the conference room doors. Her nose was throbbing, distracting her. And down below, Carter was thanking Taron and his people as the stargate began to dial up again, this time an outgoing call.

Blowing out an annoyed breath, Reese pushed away from the railing she'd leaned against and paced towards the Operations Centre, needing the distance. She caught sight of Hailey sitting behind one of the consoles, staring at her computer as if it were miles and miles away.

_Should've figured she'd be like that with the Genii paying a visit…_

Holding back a sigh, Reese sidled up to Hailey and nudged her good-naturedly. "Didn't expect presents from Santa this year."

"They had something we needed." Hailey didn't look up to meet her eyes, her tone low and faint as if her mind wasn't really present.

"Tampons and Jonny Depp?" Reese smirked, but her attempt at lightening the mood didn't have the desired effect. Hailey kept staring emptily at her computer screen with no familiar quip slipping from her lips.

 _Fucking Genii bastards._ Reese's hands clenched tightly for a moment, the only outward sign of frustration she allowed herself. _She used to be bulletproof. You took that away from her._

Hailey suddenly perked up slightly. Reese followed her line of sight to Carter and Woolsey, who had ascended the grand staircase and now approached the technicians.

Realising she wasn't in her assigned spot, Reese inched backwards, intending to blend into the background. Carter noticed, but didn't comment or order her away. Rather, she almost looked as if protocols were the last things on her mind.

It set Reese on edge.

"How are the shields holding up?" Straightening a little, Carter looked at Chuck, who sat next to Hailey.

"Good. Even though the Wraith's energy weapon has a higher output than the Asuran stargate satellite beam, it's not as efficient as the latter. The water's bleeding off most of the impact." Chuck paused, checking with his computer screen. "Still, it's straining the shields. We might be able to keep this up for six hours at the weapon's current energy output, but nothing more."

"It's enough," Carter assured him. She turned to Banks, who looked up at her as if anticipating her next question. "ETA on the Traveler fleet?"

"An hour, ma'am. _Daedalus_ is waiting for them in the next solar system."

Carter glanced between McKay, Hailey and Woolsey, her expression solemn. "Then it's time."

None answered her, but they all wore equally solemn faces.

Carter closed her eyes briefly and took a deep breath before walking towards the balcony overlooking the gate room. Following the colonel's every move with her eyes, Reese tensed further. The atmosphere had changed. Something bad was going to happen. She could feel it.

"May I have your attention?" Carter addressed the soldiers stationed below by the stargate. Reese heard the rustle of clothes and combat boots, presumably from said soldiers turning to face the colonel. Carter straightened, leaning out to rest her hands on the railing. "As you know, our best offense against the superhive was the Ascalon, which has been rendered inoperable for the time being. We have, as such, been forced to come up with a new plan to take down this second superhive."

She paused, probably giving the room time to digest her words. "The mission is this: we're sending three puddle jumpers equipped with nuclear warheads to infiltrate and destroy the superhive from within the ship. The Traveler fleet and _Daedalus_ , which will all be here in an hour, will provide cover. Although the main objective is to detonate the warheads with a timer, once inside the superhive, there is no guarantee of escape."

Again, Carter paused, her head turned down for a brief moment. When she spoke once more, her tone was hard. "Any volunteers?"

The silence that followed was deafening. Reese froze in her spot, stunned. Slowly, she turned her head towards Hailey, who rose to her feet. Before the captain could open her mouth, however, someone else spoke up first.

"I'll do it."

Reese's heart skipped a beat. Breath caught in her throat, she turned her eyes towards Ramirez, who'd stepped forward to the railing on the opposite side of the room. He looked every bit the man with a purpose.

"I got the gene therapy, so I can fly. Don't need my leg for that." Ramirez raised his chin, daring anyone to defy him.

Behind him, Nelson stared at him darkly. Then, he stepped forward too. "I'll go with him. He'll need someone to watch his back."

As Ramirez glared at Nelson, others began to voice their agreement as well from down in the gate room. Reese counted six in total, including the two sergeants.

 _This isn't the Charge of the Light Brigade,_ her mind screamed. _This is—this is—_

"I—" To the side, Hailey began to speak up and something twisted inside Reese's stomach.

Her hand shot out and grabbed Hailey's shoulder tightly, probably painfully, but she didn't care. When their eyes met, dull versus fierce, Reese shook her head, her gut wrenching with indescribable emotion. She felt as if her body was acting on its own with her mind watching helplessly.

For a moment, a sliver of doubt entered Hailey's bleary eyes. For a moment, Reese thought it was enough.

Then Carter spoke up again. Her voice seemed hesitant underneath its layer of hardness. "Anyone else?"

Hailey's eyes shone brightly as tears welled up, and her shoulder began to shrug out of Reese's tight grip, slipping away like feathers on the wind...slipping, slipping, slip…

And then the words tumbled out of Reese's mouth too. "Count me in, ma'am."

Carter turned to look at her, saw Reese's grip on Hailey, and her eyes softened in sudden realisation and hurt as they met the latter's. Faced with that, Hailey's shoulders slumped, her eyes turned down, and she didn't make another attempt to escape Reese's grip. She sank instead into her seat like a whisper on the wind, barely present once more.

A painful twitch crossed Carter's face, but then her features hardened again and she turned to Reese and nodded in acknowledgment.

After that, Reese felt as if her body wasn't part of her anymore. She looked around, her breath barely coming in and out of her lungs, and her mind wasn't quite able to grasp what she'd just done.

Until she met Ramirez's furious eyes across the room, her nose twitched painfully, and she saw everything with newfound clarity.

* * *

Seven volunteers. Not enough for three Jumpers, not when they had to anticipate resistance once the Wraith knew they'd infiltrated the ship. They'd need at least four per team: one pilot, one technician who could operate the nuke and two soldiers to cover said technician while he set the timer. Even that was a bare minimum, but it was all Sam was willing to sacrifice. Even now, she had to think of the future.

_Is this how the General felt when he ordered everyone in the SGC to evacuate so that as few as possible were killed in the self-destruct? Is this what we need to become?_

Ensconced inside the glass office for a private moment, Sam buried her face in her hands. She wished John were there. He'd be able to understand her qualms and give her the support and strength she needed.

_How do I choose who lives or dies?_

There wasn't an easy answer to that question. Only one. You consider the mission requirements and choose the best soldier suited for the job. That's how it'd always worked. That's what she'd been taught, and that's the way she'd run things.

_But still…_

With a shaky hand, Sam turned on her earpiece radio and keyed the proper channel, suppressing every sliver of doubt in her system. "Major Lorne, please report to the office."

She spotted him down in the gate room conversing with his men before complying with her order. The soldiers in his wake turned to each other, their expressions solemn. They knew what had to be done. They knew the impossible choice she would have to make.

Lorne knocked on the door before entering. Sam turned to face him, mustering whatever conviction she could. "Lee, Michaels, Emerson, Greggs and Sahid."

A testament to his professionalism, Lorne simply nodded curtly. "I'll have them report to the Jumper Bay."

"Let them bring weapons for maximum damage and crowd control. Also, if they wish to say their goodbyes to someone…" Sam paused, her voice wavering slightly. "Tell them to do it quickly."

* * *

"Why'd you do it?"

Reese had been studying the Genii nuclear devices placed inside their Jumper more closely after the briefing with Carter and Lorne, when Ramirez appeared, his tone harsh.

Straightening, Reese crossed her arms across her chest. "I think a better question is: why did _you_ do it? You're not even cleared for duty, _Sergeant_." She narrowed her eyes. "Are you so desperate to go out in a blaze of glory? Like some fucking kamikaze pilot? This is some serious shit you're getting into, Ramirez."

"Think I was born yesterday? Screw you, _pendejo_!" Ramirez snapped, stepping into her personal space. She didn't back down, even if he towered almost a head over her, even if his presence made her tingly all over. "What I do is _my_ choice. That's all that matters." He paused, his eyes glinting. "But you? You shouldn't be here."

Indescribable fury lashed through her veins like the snap of a whip.

"Don't presume you can tell me what to do, _Sergeant."_ Reese paused, narrowing her eyes, feeling as if the pressure that had built up inside her these past days was about to burst out of her. _"_ You lost any right to disagree with me the moment you broke my nose."

It was a slap in his face. She could see it and she relished it… until the second he clenched his teeth together, turned his back on her and stormed away.

_Fuck._

* * *

This was the moment. Sam stared at the wall-mounted screen. Just a brief distance away, ten white dots and one blue dot were about to arrive at the battlefield. Up in the Jumper Bay, three puddle jumpers were standing by to take advantage of the situation.

"Hyperspace windows opening," Banks reported above the throbbing hum of the Wraith attack on their shields, which suddenly lessened in strength. "Wraith energy weapon output is down by 20 %. The superhive is repositioning to greet the fleet."

_They're preparing their defence. Come hell or high waters, they're not going to give up Atlantis easily._

" _Daedalus_ is on coming around the right flank, opening fire on the superhive," Banks continued. "Generational ships are targeting remaining Wraith darts and running interference. _Vestige_ is on centre approach and preparing their weapons. Superhive is regenerating."

"Open Jumper Bay doors," Sam said, turning to the technicians and scientists seated in the Operations Centre. "Signal the puddle jumpers they've got the green light to move to location Alpha.

Hailey's console – the biometric sensors – beeped.

"Colonel, someone just pressurised the underwater Jumper bay on the North Pier underside. I'm picking up twelve life signs. No, make that twenty, twenty-two, twenty-five… Numbers are increasing." Hailey paused, looking up from her computer screen. "All Wraith, ma'am."

"How…?" Sam's eyes widened, yet realisation dawned on her quickly.

A look at Rodney told him he'd caught on too. "The Wraith darts that crashed. It was a ploy. They must have swum from the wreckage and dug their way to the underside of the city. The shield doesn't cover that area."

_It makes sense. They don't want to destroy the city. They want to use it to get to Earth. They think there's a huge feeding ground there._

_Maybe I should've told them differently._

"Major Lorne!" Sam shouted, turning towards the gate room. The man arrived in a hurry, sensing her urgency. "We've got Wraith infiltrators. North Pier, underwater bay. Twenty-five targets and increasing. Take as many men as you need and plug that hole. We'll keep you updated with enemy positions." She paused, narrowing her eyes. "You're authorised to use force."

"Yes, ma'am." Lorne nodded curtly. Turning sharply on his heel, he stormed back down the grand staircase. His voice echoed to the upper level. "Alpha, Bravo and Delta team, get your weapons and ammo – we're moving out!"

Knowing there was no point dwelling on internal security at the moment, Sam turned back towards the Operations Centre. To the side, Woolsey was still partly in shock from the sudden turn of events. She ignored him for now. "Status of the puddle jumpers?"

Chuck surveyed his computer screen. "Last one just crossed the shield. They've cloaked and are waiting for the signal. No sign the superhive has detected them yet."

"Send an encoded message to _Daedalus_ and _Vestige_ ," Sam said. "Inform them of the plan."

* * *

Ensconced inside the _Vestige's_ control chair interface, everything was just shy of a blur. John's mind intercepted and interpreted simultaneous messages and warnings at the same time, responding to most of them by instinct. One message, however, couldn't be left to instinct.

"Larrin?" John asked aloud, not completely aware of what was physically going on in the room around him. All he knew was that the Traveler engineers and technicians were helping him keep the ship together and out of annihilation's way.

"I see it," Larrin responded, her voice distant yet clear at the same time. "We are able to pick up the gateships' homing beacons on the sensors."

John could see it too. The battlefield materialised in his head, displaying the generational ships flying in criss-cross formations while chasing down Wraith darts, helped by _Daedalus'_ Titan Wing. On the right flank, _Daedalus_ – having recharged its shields – was pounding away at the superhive with Asgard plasma beam weapons and nuclear missiles, while swerving out of the way of Wraith energy weapons a moment later. And then there was him, firing off and directing Ancient drones towards both Wraith darts and the superhive, while Traveler gunners manned the railguns mounted all over the _Vestige._

In between all of this, three invisible puddle jumpers were charging the superhive from three separate directions, doing their best to avoid energy weapons, missiles, debris and ships. For a moment, it looked like they would succeed. Then one of the puddle jumpers crossed the path of the superhive's re-directed energy weapons and disappeared from his mind's map. The massive explosion that followed from carrying a Mark IX, however, took at least twenty-odd Wraith darts and parts of the superhive's hull with it.

"They've spotted the Jumpers," John called out, already redirecting his Ancient drones to intercept the Wraith darts and plasma shots headed for the remaining two puddle jumpers. "Tell everyone able to target the superhive with everything they've got. We need to keep them busy regenerating rather than expending energy on weapons fire."

The message was received quickly. _Daedalus_ changed its approach and fired off a pair of Asgard plasma beams, then repositioned and repeated the procedure even while under the occasional hits from the superhive. Four of the Traveler generational ships broke off from covering positions and shifted their energy weapons to the superhive. John followed up with ripping his drones through the superhive's dense hull, tearing off chunks of organic material that joined the expanding debris field.

The superhive's energy output refocused, pouring more into regeneration than weapons fire, but not everything. They still spewed out a hailstorm of blue energy shots, hitting all ships in range that were unable to get out in time. One of the generational ships lost shields and exploded, the remains of its hull bursting outwards to hit a neighbouring ship, which moments later sent out a distress signal.

John couldn't think about that, though, leaving it to Larrin's people. He was tracking one of the puddle jumpers, which was about to get swarmed with additional Wraith darts that appeared to be on some kind of kamikaze run. The darts crashed into each other in the Jumper's wake, attempting to pull the small Ancient ship into the subsequent explosion. They wouldn't be able to see it, but the superhive was most likely directing them. Some of the darts began to open fire, joining in the blue hailstorm from the superhive.

Even with John's Ancient drones picking off whatever Wraith dart he could, the puddle jumper didn't stand a chance. Just a few kilometres away from the superhive, it crashed into one dart, then two and three more, and ignited its nuclear device. The effect was smaller, meaning they were probably carrying the Genii's nukes rather than a Mark IX, but the explosion still dug into the superhive's hull, exposing its internal structure and resulting in secondary explosions all over the impact points.

All power shifted to regeneration and John could only stare in disbelief as the holes torn in the superhive was quickly covered with a new organic hull.

" _Damn it_! Exactly how many ZPMs do they _have_ in there?" John didn't have time to get an answer, however. New information and intercepts appeared in his mind, telling him that the last hit _Vestige_ had taken had reduced their shields to 55 %, and their drone storage was down by 50 %. Also, two more generational ships had become crippled and were currently under attack by numerous Wraith darts. Larrin was trying to communicate with him to discuss tactics, her voice frantic, but John's attention was abruptly drawn somewhere else.

The last puddle jumper was now inside the superhive.

* * *

Reese had to admit: Ramirez could fly. Not what she'd expected, given that he'd spent most of his time on grunt duty and only gotten the ATA gene therapy a few months back. But he'd been able to take advantage of the hell outside and sneak inside, even if it meant picking up some parasites along the way.

"They're still gaining on us!" Nelson shouted, observing the Jumper's HUD where four red dots were in pursuit. Outside the windscreen, the superhive's cavernous hangar bay dwarfed them by comparison.

"I know, I know! _Mierda!_ " Ramirez swore beneath his breath as he adjusted their approach out of the incoming energy shots.

With a sharp turn, he brought the Ancient mini-drones online and fired. Two of the Wraith darts were destroyed immediately. A third tried to escape, but couldn't for long. The fourth, however, swerved out of the way at the last second, causing the mini-drone to hit a suspended platform instead. Both Ramirez and the dart resumed firing, each able to make a final, almost simultaneous hit.

Reese nearly jolted out of her seat when the dart's firing grazed the puddle jumper's port drive pod, instinctually reaching out to the chair in front of her to keep steady. Her neck snapped backwards with a sudden crash, and things became a blur outside the windscreen.

She clung on, distantly aware that Ramirez was letting out a string of curses in Spanish, but unable to focus on what was going on until everything came to a screeching halt. With a painful snap, she crashed into the chair in front of her, only held back by her seat belt. Her already broken nose hit something hard and she cried out in pain.

"Bloody great landing, Ramirez," moaned Nelson, slowly sitting upright in his seat.

"Funcionete,"Ramirez responded in kind, going over the controls. Next to Reese, Airman Greggs sniggered, so she presumed Ramirez's retort was just one of his usual cocky comebacks. "Systems are still online. We should be able to fly out of here."

Reese blinked away tears of pain and focused on the flickering HUD. They were on some kind of platform. Her eyes widened; multiple life signs were converging on their location.

"Greggs, Nelson, let's go!" She unfastened her seat belt and ran back to the two Genii nukes secured in the back compartment, ignoring the blood that was starting to trail down her nostrils. "We've got incoming. Secure the outside."

Both replied in the affirmative, getting to their feet and sprinting outside after Ramirez lowered the hatch. Moments later, Reese could hear P90 weapons fire as she hurriedly unfastened the straps around the two Genii nukes.

"You stay here, Sergeant," Reese said sharply when she noticed Ramirez get to his feet and come to help her. "Make sure the systems are set to go. Wouldn't want to blow up right after take-off."

Ramirez narrowed his eyes, but didn't comment. "Aye, Captain."

Nelson appeared in the hatch opening. "You ready? We gotta move before more Wraith Drones arrive."

"Yes, take this." She handed him one end of a rubber strap and together they began to pull the Genii nukes out of the Jumper, which were fortunately set on wheels for easier deployment. She glanced back at the Jumper, where Ramirez had returned to the cockpit, but was staring back at them with a dark look. Something twisted inside her chest, but she couldn't think about that now.

"Over there." Nelson pointed to a row of Wraith darts spread out on the platform. His voice echoed in the mammoth hangar bay. "Should cause a chain reaction large enough to spread to the other levels."

Greggs was already positioned close to the entrance to the platform, firing towards whatever Wraith head popped out of the open doorway. They passed him and came to a halt underneath the first Wraith dart in the row. Gesturing Nelson to set to work since he was the one with the most technical expertise, Reese joined Greggs by the entrance and pulled up her P90.

"Nice shooting, Airman," Reese said, surveying the heap of Wraith Drones that'd already formed outside the entrance. She hunkered down, quickly taking in their surroundings.

The hangar bay was laid out like a tunnel, with each curving level containing platforms with Wraith darts and what appeared to be unfinished cruisers. They were close to the bottom, with at least twenty levels overlooking them. It wasn't the best tactical position, but they had no choice. Time was of the issue.

"Keep a look on the upper levels," Reese told Greggs. "They're excellent sniper positions. I'll cover the door."

Her radio crackled to life, Ramirez's voice sounding in her earpiece. _"We've got incoming. At least fifty life signs on four separate levels, in addition to ten Wraith darts powering up further in."_

"Copy that, Sergeant," Reese said, just as she caught sight of the first four Wraith Drones in the entrance.

Blue stunner shots burst out, causing her to press against her cover, which was a column supporting the level above them. During a lull, she swung out and opened fire. The first Drone of the group went down in spasms, followed quickly by a second before the last two jumped into cover.

Next to her, Greggs began to shoot and Reese startled when two heavy objects suddenly crashed to the ground nearby from above. She didn't have time to consider them, however, as more Drones appeared in the doorway. There were at least ten of them now, and they poured out despite the fact that she was gunning them down one by one.

"Reloading!" Reese cried out, sliding back into cover as Greggs took over. She ejected the empty mag and quickly inserted a new one, slapping the lid in place. With a nod, she swung out again and laid down suppressive fire as Greggs reloaded his weapon.

Everything became a blur. She didn't know time, only the constant pressure of her weapon firing and the relentless arrival of faceless Wraith Drones. Heat passed her by in the form of blue stunner shots, making her flinch for a second. It was time enough for yet one more Wraith to get out of the entrance and spread out along the wall in an attempt to outflank them.

"Agh!" That was Nelson's shout. Reese snapped her eyes back for a second, just long enough to see the sergeant crumble to the ground and reveal two Wraith Drones coming up on their right.

"Sergeant!" She turned to defend her and Greggs when the two Drones suddenly burst into humanoid fireballs. Shocked, she followed the trail of fire to Ramirez, who stood in the Jumper entrance with a flamethrower in his hands.

"The timer isn't set!" Ramirez shouted, turning his flamethrower towards the entrance Reese had been covering. More Drones caught fire, some running panicked in different directions only to be taken down by Greggs' well-placed shots.

Reacting on instinct, Reese jumped to her feet and sprinted to the Genii nukes. She flung herself down, caught sight of motion in the corner of her eye, and sent off a burst of 5.7 mm rounds across the chest piece of a lurking Drone. Not seeing anyone else on that edge of the platform, she turned her attention to the nukes.

Nelson had gotten about halfway. Recalling the little information she'd been given back on Atlantis pre-mission, she began to turn the old-fashioned knobs and switches.

Twice, she had to stop because another Drone had managed to outflank them, or was lowered down from the upper level. Meanwhile, she barely registered that Ramirez had moved from the Jumper to the column she'd sat behind and was blasting away at the platform entrance with the remains of his flamethrower.

Then she heard the whine of multiple Wraith darts. She looked up just as they swooped past overhead, culling beam on, but it wasn't aimed at them. It materialised ten more Drones.

"Ramirez!"

Ramirez didn't turn fast enough. The Drones were aiming for him…when they were hit by the familiar sound and sight of a P90. Greggs yelled, pulling the trigger until he was out of ammo, but he didn't get them all. Before Reese could pull up her own weapon and fire back, the Wraith hit him with at least five stun shots.

Then they burst into flames and staggered backwards, across the edge of the platform and into the dark abyss.

For a split second, Ramirez met her eyes. In the blurred background, she saw more movement from Drones exiting the entrance past all the existing humanoid fireballs, saw another culling beam materialise five Drones between them and the Jumper…and she knew what had to be done.

"I'm sorry I broke your nose, Cap'n!" Ramirez yelled, pressing the flamethrower close to his chest, his eyes more alive than she'd seen them in weeks.

Then he was bombarded with blue stun shots.

Tears filled Reese's eyes. Her fingers moved automatically, twisting the dial back until there were just ten seconds on the clock. She stared at the fallen bodies of Nelson, Greggs and Ramirez, and at the Wraith that turned their attention on her now.

_I didn't want it to end like this._

* * *

With a single beep, TARGET-2 disappeared from the sensor map. Just like that. More red dots – Wraith darts – followed, taken in the consequent blast and shockwave. Some darts immediately went into kamikaze mode, trying to take down as many enemy targets as possible.

In their wake, there were five friendlies left alive.

Cheers eventually broke out. Relieved laughter. Spontaneous hugs and tears. Someone hugged her. She thought she smiled back. She wasn't entirely sure. She couldn't stop glancing at the spot on the sensor map where the superhive's IFF signature had been.

For three-hundred-and-eight days, they'd tried to defeat the new monstrosity the Wraith had created. For three-hundred-and-eight days, the superhive's destruction had eluded them. But now, it was gone. Or at least two of them; they didn't know if there were more out there.

Even Amelia's news didn't cheer her up. "The other Wraith Hive ships have broken off trajectory and are turning back."

Nor did Lorne's news on the radio. " _All targets are accounted for, Colonel. The hole is plugged."_

Sam walked as if in a trance. She ordered the city to re-emerge from the ocean. She ordered damage and casualty reports. She coordinated with the _Daedalus,_ the _Vestige_ and the remaining generational ships to land on Atlantis for repairs. She shared the news of their victory with the rest of Atlantis, and sent off a message to Tirana, the Travelers and the Genii as well.

Then she went to the balcony for the first fresh, salty air she'd inhaled for what felt like an eternity. She leaned against the railing, watching as the remaining Traveler fleet and _Daedalus_ entered the atmosphere in the distance and turned towards Atlantis.

The doors opened. Woolsey came to stand next to her. "You did a great job, Colonel Carter." He paused, his voice low. "The current leadership owes you a debt of gratitude."

Sam's jaw tightened. "It's not me you should be thanking."

"Yes…" Woolsey sighed deeply. "Today, those twelve have shown Earth from its best side, which is more than I can say for a few others." He looked up at her, his eyes firm with conviction. "Their bravery will _not_ be forgotten."

Sam wanted to believe that. She truly did.

* * *

Sam was there on the pier when they exited the _Vestige._ Just seeing her made John smile for a moment. This was the victory for which they'd worked, bled and suffered. Despite its bittersweet taste, there was still a feeling of satisfaction. He hoped Todd was on board that ship when it blew. He hoped he wouldn't ever have to see that damn face again.

He hoped… That, in itself, was a victory. For so long, they'd faced nothing but obstacles. Now, he felt as if anything were possible.

"You're really whipped, aren't you?" Passing by him, Larrin nudged him playfully in the shoulder.

John scowled, his good mood ruined. She truly had a way to grate his nerves… With a grimace, he followed Larrin down the gangway to the pier.

Larrin strode directly to Sam, who was flanked by Woolsey and Caldwell, and then flung her arms around her. Stunned, Sam met John's eyes and patted Larrin's back awkwardly before Larrin stepped back and said, "You, my friend, are a keeper."

"We are aware," Woolsey said, smirking slightly.

Sam cleared her throat. "Larrin, this is Richard Woolsey, representative of the current leadership, and you've met Colonel Caldwell previously."

Giving Sam a second look, Larrin shook Woolsey's hand, but didn't really address him beyond a polite greeting. Once that was done, she once more turned to Sam. "Despite the circumstances, I'm glad I could finally visit this city. It's magnificent, _and_ it flies. Not up for trade, then?"

Chuckling, Sam shook her head. In that moment, John could see how tired she was; shadows lingered in her eyes like ghosts despite her laugh. It made him tense. He'd seen that look before, long ago. Given what it'd led to, he didn't want a reprise.

"You'll have to settle for the occasional visit." Sam glanced uncertainly at Woolsey. "But first we'll have to fully formalise our agreement in the council…"

"That won't be a problem." Woolsey gave her a polite smile. "I have a feeling that after today, there will be many changes around here." He paused, his smile faltering. "Once we have…settled some matters."

Sam's eyes glinted knowingly, but she didn't comment. Instead, she turned to Larrin. "I've sent a message to the Governing Council with today's result. They'd dispatched a few ships to aid you, which will be here within two days. If you need additional people or resources for the repairs, do not hesitate to ask. I can also arrange somewhere to sleep for your people if there is need for it."

"I appreciate it, but we sleep best on our ships." Larrin smiled. "I wouldn't mind a tour of the city, though, when things have calmed down."

"I'm sure that we can arrange that," Woolsey smiled.

* * *

Despite the late hour, despite the hours spent in clean-up duty and making sure no more incidents – internal or external – would happen tonight, John found himself walking down the Atlantis hallways with Sam and Woolsey. One last visit, that's what she'd told him before sighing deeply and looking as if the weight of the world had landed upon her shoulders once more.

When he caught sight of the door flanked by two guards, John grabbed Sam's hand and held her back. She turned sluggishly towards him. "You know, this could wait for tomorrow. She's not going anywhere."

"I know." Sam gave him a worn-out look. "But I need to _know_ , John. Why today? Why Earth?"

He surveyed her closely, his eyebrows creased in worry. There was still determination underneath that layer of exhaustion, and the promise of insomnia if she didn't see this through. The latter, in particular, made him nod. "Okay." He paused and gave her a hard look. "But then it's straight to bed, okay? You've had a long day."

Sam smirked slightly. "Yes, _Colonel_."

Despite the familiar inflection of his rank, John didn't feel a derisive undertone like he'd done in the months following their break-up. Rather, he sensed her playfulness and it made him smile.

They caught up to Woolsey, who'd paused in front of Xiaoyi's door. He looked uneasy, but grim; this was the task that befell those in command and he wasn't about to ignore it.

"Ready?" he asked. Sam nodded, and Woolsey gestured to one of the guards, who opened the door.

John had never been in Xiaoyi's quarters before. Judging by Sam's grimace of recognition, he knew she had. It was very Spartan, except for some Earth paraphernalia and furniture, as well as a row of orchids placed on a shelf underneath a UV light.

It felt strange. Intrusive. Yet justified. John looked around, wondering where the woman was hiding, when Xiaoyi stepped out from the kitchenette.

"Mr Woolsey, Colonels," she greeted them, then walked slowly to her couch and sat down with a cup of steaming tea. "Would you like something to drink?"

John's fists clenched. After all that'd happened, he'd expected to see a change in her behaviour, but she was as stone cold as always. He was about to open his mouth to unleash some scathing remark, but Woolsey spoke first.

"We would like some answers, Shen." Woolsey remained standing, his arms at his sides, his voice solemn. "Why did you initiate the Wormhole Drive plan, and what did you mean when you said Earth isn't gone?"

Xiaoyi's lips thinned. "I was following orders from my government."

"Your _government_?" Sam's words were heated. "This is an international base. They have no jurisdiction here."

"It wouldn't be the first time one nation's government has made decisions that have affected an entire world," Xiaoyi said, narrowing her eyes. John had to admit, she had a point. It didn't mean he agreed.

"When was this? With the discovery of the _Sun Tzu_?" Woolsey eyed her critically. John glanced at him. By the sound of his tone, the man either knew or suspected some of this. To what extent, however, John had no idea.

"Yes." Getting to her feet, Xiaoyi went to a bookshelf and retrieved a worn, leather-bound book. "The captain wrote a diary of the ship's journey since the attack on Earth. After being damaged by the alien ships, _Sun Tzu_ escaped to a Chinese off-world base for repairs. While there, the Chinese government contacted the base through communication stones. Once they learned of _Sun Tzu's_ survival, they gave her a mission: bring back Atlantis. My government believed it was the best weapon they had against the aliens."

"That's crazy," John said, frowning. "If the combined forces of Earth didn't stand a chance, what good could Atlantis do? Not to mention that we would've brought back the Wraith with us."

Xiaoyi met his eyes evenly. "Those were my orders."

"And you didn't question them," Sam stated. She'd crossed her arms and was now staring at Xiaoyi with a clear look of distaste. The woman didn't flinch; her face was a smooth mask of ice and steel once more.

Woolsey cleared his throat. "Does this mean the Chinese government, at least, is still alive?"

"Unknown." Not meeting any of their eyes, Xiaoyi's lips thinned. " _Sun Tzu_ lost touch with them about three months into their journey. Their last message was a reminder of the order to bring back Atlantis."

"Sometimes, you have to decide to disobey an order." Tightening the grip of her arms, Sam narrowed her eyes. "For the welfare of the people under your command."

John agreed wholeheartedly. Xiaoyi didn't respond.

Woolsey sighed. "What of the _Sun Tzu?_ What does the diary say of their journey?"

"Much of what the survivors have already said," Xiaoyi said tonelessly. "Their hyperdrives were damaged by the alien ships and they didn't have time to complete repairs before the Chinese off-world base was attacked. The journey from Milky Way to Pegasus claimed many lives, and the crew was forced to resort to unspeakable things in order to survive." Xiaoyi grimaced briefly. "The diary stops before they reach Pegasus, so we still do not know why they crashed on that planet."

"They were attacked by the Wraith," Sam said quietly. Both Woolsey and John stared at her in surprise. "A few days ago, I was able to decode the control crystals I retrieved from _Sun Tzu_ ," she explained to John, then turned to Xiaoyi and Woolsey. "The Wraith must have picked up their approach on sensors and attacked them as soon as they reached Pegasus. In the consequent battle, the ship wound up in the meteoroid field around the planet and crashed due to damages sustained there." She paused. "They didn't stand a chance."

To the side, Woolsey reached up to take off his glasses and rub his eyes. Underneath that grim layer of his, the day seemed to have done a number on him as well.

He replaced the glasses and sighed. "So that is one mystery solved." Narrowing his eyes, his voice grew cold. "But there are more, aren't there?"

Xiaoyi avoided Woolsey's stare and looked for a second as if her mask would fail.

Frowning, John stared at Woolsey, wondering what else the woman had done in the background that they didn't know about. The IOA representative didn't give it away, however, instead squaring his shoulders and addressing Xiaoyi once more.

"There will be an official investigation and a hearing once we are back in order. A committee representing all of Atlantis will decide your fate." Woolsey paused. "As for Earth… I find it difficult to believe that there are still people alive there. It has been ten months. From our initial reports, the alien ships were intent on destroying everything."

John noticed Sam bite her lip. He knew those facts had haunted her for a long time, and he could see that they still did. She had had friends and family there. People she cared about. She needed closure.

"If the superhives are truly gone, we could send _Daedalus_ back to check," John suggested. He locked eyes with Sam, who smiled briefly, her eyes shining brightly. "We've got friends now to watch our backs. We're not alone. Not anymore."

He shifted his eyes to Xiaoyi, who finally let a sliver of emotion past her icy mask:

Regret.

* * *

Strolling down the dark, familiar hallways, Sam could feel her feet growing heavier with each step. The day was gradually left behind. She didn't miss it. The whole day had been intense and gut wrenching, and the encounter with Xiaoyi had sapped her of the last remnants of energy. When Woolsey left for his quarters earlier, it'd been as if the air had been let out of her. She'd practically sagged against the transporter wall.

In step next to her, John eyed her with scrutiny. "I'm thinking you need a 'Do Not Disturb Or Get Shot On Sight' sign on your door."

Sam's immediate response was a quick grin that, for a moment, dispelled the draining sensation of exhaustion. Rounding a corner, she thought of something to say, but then froze when they came in view of the said door.

"What's wrong?" John wore a deep frown, his eyes obviously trying to figure her out so that he could fix it. But faced with his sincere determination to help, Sam couldn't meet his eyes.

Physically, it was just a room. No monsters under the bed, no assassins in the night. In short: nothing scary.

 _Just a room,_ the words echoed inside her head. _Except it isn't…and right now, I don't…_

She knew what would happen once she crossed that threshold. Despite the exhaustion, she would remember the last moment in the Jumper Bay when she'd given the twelve brave men and women, some of which she'd ordered to go, her last speech. She'd go through the words she'd spoken, over and over, wondering if they were enough or if they'd felt fake and superficial. And she would wonder what their last moments were like, and remember those she'd befriended on Tirana, and think about Hailey and the indication that she'd been about to volunteer for the mission, even though Hailey knew it'd be suicide, and how Sam wasn't ready to lose another who'd become her family, and—

"Sam?" John prompted, stepping closer with that worried pair of eyes she'd seen following her in-between the clean-up earlier, and she knew a simple "I'm fine" wouldn't suffice. Compared to a month ago, the truth slipped easier from her lips.

"I'm tired, John." Her voice was low, almost a whisper, almost weak and broken. "Not just from the past couple of days. I'm… I'm _really_ tired."

The rest was left unspoken: _Tired of losing people, of regrets and second-guessing, of keeping secrets, of being scared and alone._

Tears began to well up in her eyes; she was too tired to resist. A flicker of understanding reflected in John's dark eyes and he suddenly pulled her into a hug, squeezing her firmly against his chest. Sam held on tightly, her tears soaking blearily into his shirt.

No words were spoken. He held her until her silent sobs quietened down a few moments afterwards, then pulled her a little awkwardly after him past her door and down the hallway. She followed, not caring whether anyone saw them, and let him lead her into his quarters.

* * *

 **Next:** "...of a foreign field..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GLOSSARY
> 
> Pendejo = stupid
> 
> Mierda = shit
> 
> Funcionete = pussy


	27. DAY 308-345

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Things never really end, they just…transform into something else."

* * *

**TWENTY-FOUR | "…of a foreign field…"**

_Prompt: A time to be born_

_Music: "Waking up" by Explosions In the Sky (_ Lone Survivor _) and "Hope (Xavier's Theme)" by John Ottoman et al. (_ X-men: Days of Future Past _)_

* * *

" _Family means no one gets left behind or forgotten." – **David Ogden Stiers**_

* * *

**DAY 308**

Walking through the city, occasionally crossing the silvery beams of moonlight, Hailey was alone. No one bothered her. She bothered no one. She could just walk and let her feet take her wherever. She didn't care where. The attack was over, the evacuees had returned from Tirana, and everyone except a skeleton staff had gone to sleep. She could just drift through the hallways like a gust of air. Undetected, leaving no mark behind.

She didn't notice her surroundings until she ended up by the Memorial Wall.

Candles were burning, painting the wall with flickering shadows. Eyes from hundreds of pictures stared back at her in the orange glow. Happy faces. Stern smiles. Grimaces. Slanted handwriting on pieces of paper. Expressions of love, expressions of grief. No expressions of hope.

Hailey didn't know why she'd ended up here. Perhaps her feet had had a mind of their own. Perhaps it'd just been fate, a deterministic chain of events that had each been crossed off in order to bring her here. She knew the reasonable answer. She could explain it in at least twenty four-syllable words. But none of it made sense right now.

A shifting light caught her attention, coming from a tablet computer mounted on the wall. Stiffening, Hailey stared at it and saw the white bold lettering splayed across the screen: HERE WE MARK THE PRICE OF FREEDOM.

_The price of-_

_"I hate caves,"_ Reese had uttered miserably just outside the Genii underground capitol.

The memory came unbidden and sudden to her mind. Pain blossomed in her hands. Blinking, Hailey looked down to see she'd clenched them to the point where her nails had dug into the skin, breaking it and drawing blood.

Stunned, she stared at the small red marks, so distant from where she was, and her mind went completely, utterly, numbingly blank.

No memories. No thoughts. No images. Not a single thing.

Raising her head towards the computer screen, Hailey stared but didn't see. Her feet began to drift, but she didn't notice. Soon, she was swallowed up in nothingness...and she didn't want to leave ever again.

* * *

**DAY 309 - early morning after the Wraith attack**

Sunlight streamed in through the windows. Sam blinked her eyes sleepily to clear her vision, the room coming into sharper focus as she awoke. For a moment, she looked in confusion at the nightstand where the thick tome of _War and Peace_ lay and at the Johnny Cash poster tacked to the wall opposite of her. Then she remembered and she smiled.

The digital clock behind _War and Peace_ showed 06:25. Even though she'd slept for just four hours, she felt relatively rested. She shifted on the mattress, slipping off the blanket John had tucked her in last night and propping herself up on one elbow.

She was still dressed apart from her shoes and jacket. So was he. Soft snores muffled by his pillow, John sat propped up in an Ancient-style armchair he'd appropriated sometime two years ago, his blanket pooling around his feet. His features were smooth, showing nothing of the mixed feelings he'd shown last night.

After holding her for a while, he'd insisted she take the bed for the rest of the night. She'd protested, but to no avail. Despite his Kirkian reputation, John was a gentleman, claiming one of the few things he'd learned from his upbringing was how to take care of a woman with respect. By then Sam was ready to drop dead, so she didn't object any further.

But now, staring at him with a gentle smile and recalling the firmness with which he'd held her last night, Sam acted without thinking. She got up quietly, crossed the room and picked up his hand with comfortable familiarity.

John jerked, his eyes blinking up at her in drowsy confusion. "Sam?"

Sam smiled. "Come on. You're gonna get a bad kink if you sleep there. We still have an hour before we need to get up."

Frowning groggily, he followed her back to the bed and lay down with just a slightly deeper furrow of his eyebrows. Sam got down next to him and cuddled up snugly against his side, closing her eyes with another smile.

If he had questions, he didn't ask, but his arm curled around her and his head touched hers…and that was enough for now. With the Wraith attack averted and Xiaoyi exposed, she figured they had time.

Finally.

* * *

**DAY 314 – Five days later**

Rubbing her eyes tiredly, Sam stared blearily at the computer screen. After three hours of intensive work, the text of fancy bureaucratic and diplomatic lingo stating something about the purpose and intricate agreements of the Atlantis-Traveler-Genii Alliance seemed nothing more than a jumble.

"The world would've been a better place if an end to things actually meant _an end_ ," she muttered lowly at the screen.

Putting down a cup of strong Athosian herbal tea on her desk, Daniel chuckled. "Be careful what you wish for. I personally don't want to face a full-on apocalypse. Just imagine the paperwork." He sipped his own tea and settled on the Ancient style couch placed nearby to provide a more informal setting in the otherwise stern and Spartan office she'd taken as her own while she was in the city.

"Don't need to imagine." Sam smiled weakly, thinking of the hours spent in front of a computer or in meetings since the Evacuation last Christmas.

Conceding defeat, she closed the laptop, picked up her cup of tea and sat down next to Daniel. A sigh escaped her lips as her eyes closed, relieving some of the strain she'd felt moments ago.

"I thought that once our situation with the Wraith superhive and Xiaoyi had been resolved, and the Travelers left after their basic repairs, I'd finally have some _real_ time off," Sam said. Much to her friends' annoyance, she still worked round the clock, although she'd finally learned not to forgo eight hours of sleep.

Opening her eyes, Sam brought the cup to her lips and blew on the hot liquid to cool it. Then she sat back and sighed again. "There's still so much for me to do. So many people to take care of. So many issues to resolve, like formalising our alliance with the Genii and the Travelers. It feels like just another beginning."

"That's because it is," Daniel said gently, giving her a pensive look. "Things never really end, they just…transform into something else."

Sam smirked. "You could compete with Confucius."

"I take that as a compliment." Smiling, Daniel took a gulp of his tea and then put down the cup. "Anyway, from what I hear, this is going to be Woolsey's headache soon."

"One of them, in any case," Sam said. "I doubt calling off the Martial Law tomorrow will ease people's minds completely." Staring into her tea, she lowered her voice. "Not with everything that's happened."

Although there'd been a clear, unspoken divide on Atlantis after the Evacuation, things had never come to true blows until Xiaoyi's Wormhole Drive plan drove the two factions into a physical confrontation, ending with Sam's implementation of Martial Law. In the days since, the city had been a time bomb. The wrong choice of words had resulted in verbal outbursts and physical fights, forcing her to post SOs around the city again in order to keep things calm. _That_ hadn't gone over particularly well, with her worst critics, all of them outspoken civilians, screaming 'tyranny' and 'military takeover' and criticising her for incarcerating Xiaoyi and those who'd been involved in her plan.

On the plus side, dealing with the enlisted men and officers who'd sided with Xiaoyi had been easy. Any threat to the military homogeneity was a serious offense. Every soldier knew that; it was ingrained into their bones during basic training.

So Sam took it as a good sign that none of the enlisted men had appealed the disciplinary actions and demotions she and Caldwell had doled out yesterday, accepting the punishments for what they were. As for the commissioned officers, with Lieutenant Colonel Dawkins in the lead, they'd requested administrative discharges rather than facing courts-martial and the near certainty of the worse Under Other Than Honourable Conditions discharge. In Sam's eyes, it was the most honourable way out for them. After all, there'd be no point trying to deny the fact they'd divided the military with their actions in a court-martial.

"Well, Woolsey's lawyer background will probably come in handy," said Daniel, drawing her out of her reminiscing. "He's got a way with words on his good days, and he knows most of these people. It might be difficult, but I think he'll be able to find a way to balance it all out."

"Yeah," Sam agreed pensively. "Probably."

They drifted off to a comfortable silence for a while before Daniel's expression changed suddenly.

"Anyway, since I came here to put your mind off the serious things…" Eyes twinkling, Daniel stared at her above the rim of his cup. "Any news you want to share with me? Maybe _other beginnings_ you've experienced?"

Sam blushed.

* * *

**DAY 317**

Despite it being the beginning of this planet's autumn season, the ocean wind was warmer than expected against her hot skin. Sam relished it and closed her eyes for a moment to let the breeze swoop over her. Her racing pulse and aching muscles was starting to ease back, leaving her both refreshed and sore.

The sounds of running steps on metal made her open her eyes. She looked back at the wide stretch of the West Pier, shading her eyes from the rising sun in the east. Twenty yards away and closing, John's features became clearer and she could see a wide grin manifest on his face.

"Show-off," Sam said as he came to a halt next to her, barely winded even though this was his second lap and she was halfway through her first. She picked up his water bottle and tossed it to him. John caught it with his hand and smirked.

"You'll get there," he said, taking a chug of water.

Sam rolled her shoulders, stretching slightly as she mentally prepared for the rest of the run. Although her muscles didn't protest as much as they'd done fourteen days ago when they started this morning routine, she could still feel that something was off with her body.

"Maybe," Sam said eventually in response to John's previous statement. "It's taking me longer to bounce back than I'm used to. Back at the SGC, if I'd been slacking off on the workouts during science projects, it usually didn't take me long to get back in shape." She sighed and picked up her water bottle, fixing it in place in a strap on her hip. Then she grimaced. "I think I'm getting old."

"Not old, just…mature." John winked at her teasingly and she couldn't help chuckle. Following her lead, he also strapped his water bottle to his hip. "Come on. It's too early to think about getting old."

With a sudden grin, he slapped her lightly on her arm, cried out "Tag, you're it!" and proceeded to fast-track back where he'd come from.

Sam was only stunned for a fraction of a second. Then she burst out laughing at the ridiculousness of it all and pelted after him, pushing as much force into her sore legs as she possibly could.

Even though John clearly kept it at a pace that matched hers, she didn't care. Once she finally tagged him, she was breathless, aching all over, but feeling fantastic. She needed that. He made her feel alive again, and little by little, that wondrous feeling drove off the deeply embedded doubts she still wrestled with every day.

"So how's it going with Hailey?" John asked once they'd stopped for another break, his breath finally coming out a little more strained than before.

"I don't know. She's not saying much." Lying on her back catching her breath, Sam stared up at the clear blue sky and sighed. "Doesn't help that I'm going to be off visiting the Travelers and the Genii to discuss the alliance treaty for an unknown period of time. I'm trying to be there for her and sometimes it works, but not always."

Chugging down a gulp of water, John's eyes flickered darkly. "Sometimes…people have to sort out things for themselves."

"I know." Sam blew another hard breath. "It's just…frustrating being kept on the outside. We used to share things."

"Give her time," John said. He put the cap back on the bottle. "You can't solve every little problem, Sam. Puts too much pressure on you, and that went so _wonderfully_ last time."

His sarcastic tone made Sam glance up at him with a petulant glare. "I _know_. I've learned my limits." _Even if I cannot always maintain them…_ "No more wrecking my quarters and breaking Rubik's cubes."

"Good, because fixing that cube was a real pain in the ass," John said with a grimace, then threw his water bottle down and went to find a gym bag he'd left nearby. "Ready for part two? I brought the bantos rods today. Thought we could kick it up a notch."

Getting to her feet with a wince, Sam ignored her already aching, weary muscles and nodded with teasing bravado. "Sure. Bring it on. I could do with a win today."

* * *

Dr MacKenzie's office was unchanged. There were still five pens laid neatly out on his desk next to a notepad. The small potted plant in the corner still seemed to lack just a little bit of water. The Ancient textile material of his couch still felt strange to her touch.

Hailey turned her head to the nearby window. Golden gleams of light poured inside at an angle, like holy sunbeams seen in movies or an Asgard transporter beam. Evidently, it was a nice day outside. Warm. Comfortable. Perfect beach weather, perhaps; she'd overheard someone talk of going to one of the piers for a dip in the ocean, even if the ocean was freezing cold this far from the mainland.

Maybe she should take a dip herself. The cold wouldn't bother her. It might even coax some sort of feeling from her, or at least a reaction.

"Captain Hailey?"

Hailey turned her eyes to MacKenzie, who sat in the armchair opposite of her balancing a notepad on his crossed legs. The man had raised an eyebrow, his eyes clearly examining her expression.

" _What_?" She raised an arched eyebrow in return.

"I asked you earlier if you had written down your thoughts since last session," MacKenzie asked, unperturbed by her snappy retort.

_My thoughts…_

Hailey looked away again, focusing instead on a nearby bookshelf. There seemed to be a few new books in it, but where he'd dug those up, she had no idea. Maybe in the exchange markets Atlantis had set up a few months back: with no clear currency or economic system put together, people traded what they had for what they needed. Not a perfect situation, perhaps, but the leaders had had other concerns at the time.

"Captain…" MacKenzie prompted once more, regaining her attention. He leaned forward slightly in his chair. "We talked about this. Paying attention to how you think and feel about your trauma is the next step of cognitive processing therapy. Burying your emotions is not the answer."

Logically, Hailey knew that. They'd spent the first session identifying her PTSD symptoms and discussing which approach would be most suitable for her. Then MacKenzie had explained all the steps of CPT and how they would help her. Logically, she knew this was the necessary next step before moving on from the event where she'd been shot.

She just couldn't do it. The words wouldn't come, nor the memories. They were blocked by something, and she didn't know what. All that was left were the symptoms and the mixed feelings of failure and something she couldn't describe more than a black hole in the middle of her chest.

If she'd had the choice, she wouldn't be here.

MacKenzie cleared his throat. "Let's try a different approach."

Hailey let him try, but her eyes began drifting once more around the unchanging office and in the end she barely said a word.

* * *

**DAY 327**

Reika would make a terrible recon scout, John mused with a smile as he heard her shout of joy echo from one of the intersecting hallways up ahead.

Strolling forward at a comfortable pace, he rounded the corner just in time to see the tiny Kadarian girl fling herself at Sam, who was in the midst of talking with a group of scientists. On instinct, Sam caught her before Reika threw them off-balance. There was a momentary stunned expression on Sam's face before she broke into a welcoming smile, the people with her glancing at each other with amusement.

John didn't hear what they talked about since he was still a bit far off, but Reika was gesticulating wildly and energetically towards something and he could venture a guess it had something to do with the football tucked underneath his arm.

By the time he caught up to them, Sam was amused and faced him with a grin. "So _this_ is how you spend your time off these days."

"The classified stuff got boring," teased John, twirling the football between his fingertips. "Once the secret's out, all the fun's gone." He reached down to ruffle Reika's hair and grinned at her. "Besides, I didn't have any kid's size golf clubs."

"Golf's boring," stated Reika with feeling as she brushed her hair back. It drew a chuckle out of Sam and some of the other scientists, who seemed to withdraw to a respectable distance to give them some privacy.

"Well, what'd _you_ know, kiddo?" John nudged Reika lightly, pretending to be hurt. He then handed her the football and said, "You go ahead. I'll be with you in a second."

Reika didn't need much coaching. Grabbing the football with both hands, she skipped down the hallway and started throwing it into the walls and floors. As it bounced back at odd angles, she giggled and ran after it only to repeat the action.

Keeping Reika in his eyesight, John turned back to Sam and smirked. "Great kid. Ignorant, though. Have to rectify that."

"Maybe in a few months we'll produce more than just things of necessity down in the manufacturing plant," Sam said. Her easy smile and quiet confidence was becoming a familiar sight and one that he welcomed. It proved that she was stronger now. More herself.

 _Exorcising a few demons can do that to someone_ , John reminded himself, thinking of Xiaoyi and the Wraith attack a few weeks ago.

"Though we'll probably have to implement a better currency than mutual trade," Sam continued. "Heard some people complain about not being properly paid in months."

"There's always something," John said, shaking his head. He then gestured to the gaggle of scientists now deep in discussion over a tablet computer. "So you're heading off again?"

"Yeah. A message from the Travelers came in this morning. They encountered some problems with one of the solar panel satellites in the dyson ring, so we're going to check it out." She glanced at her watch. "But first I've got to check in with Woolsey."

"What a surprise," John deadpanned.

Since he'd assumed official command after the Martial Law ended, Woolsey had had Sam on speed dial. At first it'd been to discuss how to calm the friction in the city between Xiaoyi's faction and the rest, then it'd been about how to handle their newfound allies, and it'd snowballed from there. As it were, Sam had only been back to Tirana once to fetch new clothes and toiletries, and to decide on a temporary administrator. The rest of the time she'd been busy with disciplinary actions and preparations for courts-martial, as well as working out the details in their alliance treaty with the Genii and the Travelers, with each part trying to get as big a piece of the cake as possible.

"Well, if Larrin wants access to my gene again, tell her it's my day off and she can shove off," John said with feeling. He began to turn in the direction Reika had ventured, then stopped, smirked and gave Sam a mock salute. "With all due respect, of course, _Ambassador_."

Sam rolled her eyes at the moniker and turned to join the group of scientists in their discussion. "I'll let her know."

* * *

The days blurred together. Time was fluid, no longer divided into hours and minutes. She slept, she got up, she ate, she walked to the science lab, she ate, she walked to Carter's office, she did some office work, then she went back to her quarters and lay in bed until she drifted off to sleep once more. Occasionally, the pattern was broken up by odd events, like her pointless sessions with Dr MacKenzie or going out for the random drink with some of her previous bunk mates from Tirana.

Speaking, however, came out only as muffled buzzing. People buzzed to her every day, their lips moving without words escaping, and she nodded or shook her head at the appropriate places. She knew where those places were, when to do what. It'd become natural to her by now.

By far, McKay buzzed the most. Hailey kept frowning every time he opened his mouth in her direction, wishing he'd just shut up or talk to someone else. Sometimes, she ignored him. He hated that. She didn't care. He was disturbing the comfortable numbness she dove into every day.

If it hadn't been for Carter riding her back and Dr MacKenzie watching her every move, she'd never even bother coming to work. She'd just stare into the ceiling of her quarters and let the darkness swallow her up. It felt good; it was the only thing she felt at all.

But Captain Jennifer Hailey was still needed, apparently, because she was the only one who knew how to construct and maintain an Ascalon apart from Carter, and Carter was busy playing the diplomat. So she got up in the morning, she ate, she went to the science lab, and she stared at numbers and blueprints all day...and listened to McKay's buzzing.

"Honestly, I don't know why I'm even trying!"

Hailey didn't know what McKay was going on about this time, but she could see him in the corner of her eye walking restlessly around the room and waving his hands in the air. A few times, he turned towards her, probably to glare, but she didn't turn to face him. Instead, she just stared at the numbers on her screen, her mind drawing a blank.

McKay continued to rant, his words turning into a buzz once they crossed the barrier of her numb sphere. Hailey stared...and stared...and stared...and after a while she realized she had no idea _what_ she was staring at exactly.

Blinking, Hailey looked up and found McKay hovering right over her. Arcing an eyebrow, she said, "What?"

McKay gritted his teeth together so hard they looked like they might crack. "Haven't you listened to a word I've just said? No, wait, of course you haven't. You're just perfectly happy sitting there ensnared in your own pretty little world, while everyone else is working their asses off. Just like you've been doing all week!"

"Rodney..." Zelenka cut in with a hesitant tone. Standing a little ways behind McKay, he was staring at her in pity, the kind when people are sorry you're not as great as you used to be, or sorry that you've suffered such a loss or trauma that you cannot even do the simplest things.

Her body moved automatically. She took no part in it. Without knowing why, Hailey pushed her chair back and strode out of the room, shutting every noise out of her comfortable bubble.

It was only when she reached the silence and darkness of her quarters that Hailey realized that her whole body was trembling. Squeezing her burning eyes shut, she burrowed beneath her blankets, tightening them around her until the numbness swallowed her up whole again.

* * *

"No, I'm sorry, Dr MacKenzie, I haven't seen her." Pinching the ridge of her nose, Sam fought the intensifying wave of worry that made every sensation in her chest feel just the slightest bit _off_ , as if her body and mind weren't completely connected. It was an unsettling feeling. "I've been off-world all day and just got back. She didn't show up for her session?"

" _No. She's not responding to my calls either, and her quarters were empty. Also, I heard from Dr McKay that she left work early today,"_ MacKenzie spoke, his voice calm and steady in her earpiece radio. _"You know her best, Colonel. Any idea where she would go?"_

"Um, there was this cave on Tirana that she really liked." Sam sighed and ran a hand across her tired face. From what little she knew, Hailey hadn't shown any suicidal tendencies, but right now every nasty little possibility ran through her mind. "I'll check with the operations centre to see if she's gone off-world. I'll have them check the biometric sensors as well. She might be hiding out somewhere in the city."

" _Thank you, Colonel."_ As if an afterthought, MacKenzie added in a gentler tone, " _I'm sure she is all right, Colonel. This is just a precaution."_

"Of course," Sam said, but her fears weren't entirely assuaged. The nagging feeling of inadequacy and failure made sure of that. "I will let you know what I find out."

Logging off, Sam exhaled and inhaled deeply before looking up at Woolsey, who sat awkwardly behind his desk trying to look busy with anything else but listening to her conversation.

"Sorry," she said, straightening in the comfortable armchair and trying to push thoughts of Hailey away for a moment to finish this meeting. "You were saying something about—uh, the Kadarian children?"

Woolsey hesitated. "We can do this later if you have other—"

"No, please," Sam interrupted, her chest flaring up again with that unsettling feeling of worry along with something else. "It sounded important. You can just give me the quick rundown."

"Okay," Woolsey said, then cleared his throat and shifted forward in his seat. "I received the latest progress report on the Kadarian children's physiological and psychological state today. It says that the children are soon ready to be discharged, which means that we'll be starting the adoption process." He paused and added in a lower voice, "The official word goes out to the potential families tomorrow morning."

It felt as if the air had been knocked out of her.

 _It's too soon. She can't leave yet. I'm not—_ Sam couldn't find the words, even in her mind. Her whole torso flared with uncomfortable heat even as her extremities went cold, creating an uneasy mixture of fear and sadness storm within her veins.

As per the original agreement with Xiaoyi, the Kadarian children would be resettled with Pegasus natives who share a similar cultural lifestyle as them, the logic being that the transition would be smoother and they wouldn't run the risk of ending up in less than desirable conditions on Tikwa.

"I see," said Sam in the end, her voice carefully restrained and her fingers clenched slightly around the armrests of her chair. Standing up, she let her hands reach around her back and intertwine tightly. "Well, thank you for telling me. I'll just—"

"We're going allow applications from Atlantis personnel," Woolsey said evenly, making Sam stop in her tracks. The ghost of a smile crossed his lips. "I know it is not what was originally agreed by the senior council under Xiaoyi, but upon careful consideration, I have decided that Atlantis could stand to earn some new members of society. After all, we're it."

Even if she knew the answer, Sam couldn't help ask, "What'd you mean?"

"We're the last remnants of Earth and we've been entrusted with everything that entails, as well as this magnificent city," Woolsey said, leaning back in his chair with a sigh. "As such, if we're going to survive as a society and not one day become solely dependent upon others, we need to bring new generations into this world. And since we have yet to discuss the matter of the military's fraternisation regulations… This could be a first step."

 _He's expecting you to be happy,_ Sam realised as she studied Woolsey's slightly guarded expression. … _So why aren't you?_

Smiling a little awkwardly, Sam nodded and tried to push down all the uncomfortable feelings swirling around her body. "Yes. It, uh, it would."

"Good," said Woolsey, the tension in his eyes easing up. "Then I'll make the announcement tomorrow, and we'll let the Adoption Committee handle the rest."

"Good. Good. I'll… I'll look forward to that."

Leaving the office behind, Sam's mind was storming. It wasn't until Chuck's hesitant "Ma'am?" that she realised she'd been standing in the middle of the operations centre and staring into empty air for who knew how long.

"Can I help you?" Chuck asked again.

She wanted to say ' _no'_ , but that would mean admitting that she'd just made a startling realisation about herself that she wasn't ready to face.

"Um, yeah," Sam said instead and shook her head as clear as possible. "I need to find Captain Hailey."

* * *

**DAY 331**

The door was closed. It seemed that nothing short of blasting it off with a pack of C4 or rappelling down from the tower roof would open it; someone who knew perfectly well what she was doing had disabled it from the inside.

Like every day before today, her hand fell impotently from the buzzer and she touched her forehead to the cold metal of the door. Her eyes fluttered shut for a brief second and she tried not to let the uneasy, coiling mix of failure and worry rush through her yet again. As far as the biometric scans were concerned, Hailey's life signs were fine. Dr MacKenzie had also been able to get in touch with her for the past three days and he claimed to be getting through to her, even if the process was slow going.

But Sam was shut out. MacKenzie wasn't allowed to say why due to patient-doctor confidentiality. All he could reiterate was to let Hailey open up the door when she was ready.

Sam knew that, but standing idly by felt wrong. Hailey had always been a woman of action; she'd risked her life, and career, several times for what she believed in _and_ for her friends. The last time she'd done it she'd saved Sam's life and almost lost her own. Among soldiers, that counted for something, and to most it would garner a deep sense of respect and an instinctual need to repay the favour.

But Sam knew it wasn't any life debt that brought her here every day in the hopes that Hailey would one day let her in. It was something else; something she wasn't technically supposed to encourage given their differences in rank, but something that had grown nevertheless from the fact that they'd both lost so much.

So facing this damned closed door as the closest thing Hailey had to family… The rejection stung worse than if she'd only been there as Hailey's superior officer.

"I'm heading off again today, Jenn," Sam told the closed door, even though she knew Hailey wouldn't be able to hear her. "Make sure you eat something." She paused and brushed her hand against the cold metal with a sigh. "I'll be back again tonight."

Leaving the door behind always left her with a strange unsettled feeling in the pit of her stomach, as if afraid that when she returned Hailey would be gone.

 _It's not just her, though,_ Sam reminded herself sadly, glancing towards the main tower and the infirmary level the next time she passed a window. _They could both be gone by the time I return._

* * *

"It's okay, Reika. These people just want to say hello." Crouching down in front of the bed under which Reika had sought safety, Daniel met the girl's eyes in the shadows. They were shining brightly with unshed tears.

"I don't want to," Reika said weakly. She was clutching her crayons tightly in her hands. "Make them go away."

Daniel held back a sigh, his eyes fluttering closed for a second. It was uncharacteristic of her to behave like this; she'd been pretty open and friendly towards anyone she'd met on Atlantis. The second she'd caught sight of the couple from New Aleira, however, she'd ducked under her bed and refused to come out.

"Let's try this," Daniel began, giving Reika a smile and an outstretched hand. "You don't have to say anything and you can sit on my lap the whole time. Would that be okay?"

Reika shook her head. "No. I don't want to." To emphasise her point, she edged further back until she was hugging the wall.

Daniel knew moving the bed or simply dragging her out would be easy, but that'd probably just make this even worse. With the attack on New Kadara, Reika had been through more than anyone her age should bear; her recent conversations with one of the base therapists had revealed as much. Nothing could change the fact that the little girl had lost both her family _and_ the majority of her people.

_So maybe I shouldn't be surprised by her behaviour at all. Maybe it's someone else's that I should question…_

Sighing, Daniel knew that line of thought wouldn't get him anywhere – God knows he'd tried – so he got up to his knees and glanced at the young Aleirian couple standing a little awkwardly just inside the doorway of Reika's room.

They had clearly put on their best clothes and had seemed eager to make a good first impression once the rules of the adoption had been explained to them. Both were in their thirties and childless, which seemed to be a source of great sorrow based on his conversation with them earlier.

"I'm sorry," Daniel said, rising to his feet. "I think she needs some time to adjust. If we just stay here for a bit, she might come out on her own."

"I understand," the woman, Lysea, said. Her eyes were shimmering brightly, nearly as much as Reika's eyes had been, and she was clutching her husband's hand tightly. She seemed to take this personally despite her words saying otherwise. The husband, Tor, was more of the stoic, silent type, but Daniel could see the tension around his eyes and lips.

Feeling for them, _and_ for the scared little girl underneath the bed, Daniel gestured to the chairs and table that'd been brought inside the room. "Let's sit down and talk for a while. And maybe afterwards, we can draw a little. I know someone who can teach us how to draw dragons."

Glancing at the bed, Daniel smiled, but it never reached his eyes.

* * *

**DAY 333**

The grass was turning brown, no longer reaching her thighs. Flowers had started to wither, sensing the oncoming winter. The air was colder, sometimes feeling as if it tore inside her throat when she opened her mouth. Winter was coming.

Sitting on a bench someone had put together from several logs, Sam stared at the field of grave markers in front of her. There were stones and crosses, dogtags and no dogtags, Stars of David and Muslim star and crescents. The symbols came alive for her. She read the names and recognised each from staff photos that'd gone up on the Memorial Wall.

So many dead. Not just those in front of her, but so many unseen faces and unspoken names back on Earth, on the off-world bases in the Milky Way, on the _Sun Tzu_ and the _Apollo_. By now, she figured even the _Odyssey_ had to have been destroyed. She'd certainly disappeared and not been seen or heard from since three weeks before the attack on Earth, and Sam's work had so far been fruitless in solving the ship's mystery. Then there were all the people of the Milky Way that she knew: Bra'tac, Rya'c, the Free Jaffa, the Nox, the Cimmerians, the Edorans, the Kelownans… There were too many to count. Too many even to remember in her prayers.

Sam sighed, rubbing a hand over her eyes. The tears burned on her eyelashes then vanished into her hand. Still the bottomless emptiness in the pit of her stomach remained. She could try to fill it with as much as she could or try to plainly ignore it, but in moments like this it ripped open once more and she could do nothing but ride out the storm.

Looking up, she stared at the graves again, fisting her hands together. She committed their names and their faces to memory, as she did every time she'd come here since the Wraith attack. She willed herself not to forget those in the empty graves: Captain Reese Matthews' remarkable loyalty, Senior Sergeant Miguel Ramirez's Spanish exclamations, or Airman First Class Jay Emerson's young enthusiasm.

Her nails dug into her skin but she didn't care. It was better than just stare and do nothing.

"Trying to raise the dead?" John's voice appeared out of nothing; she hadn't heard him approach. She saw him standing on the edge of the field, his cheeks and nose already red from the cold wind.

"We've seen crazier things," Sam said with a slight self-deprecating smile. When John's smile didn't reach his eyes, she sighed and scooted a little sideways to indicate an empty seat next to her. He sat down with a _creak_ from the wood. She returned to staring at the graves, ticking off the names in her mind. "How'd you find me anyway?"

"I used my Jedi skills to locate you in the Force."

Sam chuckled, seeing straight through him. "You mean you asked Chuck."

"Yeah." Crossing his legs at the ankles, John smirked. "What can I say? The guy's got a nose like a bloodhound. Also happens to know where you can find the last decent coffee grinds in the city, but he ain't telling. Even offered him a week off. No deal."

"Sounds like I'll need to have a chat with Sergeant Campbell," Sam said, grinning.

She met John's eyes, warmth welling up inside her just at the sight of the easy smirk he gave her. They'd come more frequently lately and each one managed to remind her that there were some things that weren't as bad as the rest. It made it easier for her to accept the terrible things that had happened almost a year ago and those that'd happened since. It made it easier to move on, even if it were only a few millimetres some days and several miles other days.

"I finally managed to get a look at them today," Sam said, leaning back on the bench to stare at the things beyond the field of graves.

John followed her eyes, gazing at the evergreen forests, the distant glittering ocean and the snow-capped mountains in turn. His voice was low and solemn when he finally spoke. "And?"

"They look just like us. Normal." Sam snorted; the sound was hollow even to her own ears. An unsettling feeling rose once more from the pit of her stomach. "It sounds horrible, but I'd hoped they'd look…different. Weird and twisted, somehow."

"It's not horrible," stated John, slowly bringing his crossed arms up to rest against his chest. "The kids need good families." He glanced at Sam, smirking slightly despite the pained edge in his features. "You just wanted your spidey sense to go off in case something was iffy about the potential parents. You're looking out for the kids."

"Yeah… I guess." Sam sighed, running a hand through her bangs before glancing up at him. "Are we doing the right thing, though? I know we reasoned she might be better off with someone who can give her the life she used to have, but Reika doesn't want to leave."

John's jaw clenched momentarily. "You have a choice, you know. It's not too late."

Sam tensed, her neck stiff in all the wrong places.

Of course she knew that. The thought had been with her for a long time, even before Woolsey revealed his intentions to allow Atlantis personnel to apply for adoption and before Daniel had been hounding her for days on why she hadn't handed in her application yet.

"I know," Sam whispered finally. "But I can't help thinking that… I'm not the one she needs." She inhaled deeply, her eyes welling up with tears. "Lately I've been so busy with disciplinary matters, with the Alliance, with trying to reach Hailey, and…and with you." She felt him tense slightly next to her. "I can't see how that'll change."

Sighing, Sam continued, "I'm supposed to be a good role model, friend and CO. I'm supposed to be on Tirana. I'm supposed to resolve the mystery of the missing _Odyssey_. And until the Genii and the Travelers home worlds are also protected by Ascalons, I'm supposed to be the diplomatic liaison between them and us. Those are already more than a full-time job."

Sam looked down at her hands. She was wringing them over and over, her fingertips turned red in the cold air, but she hardly felt it. Her insides were storming too much. The truth was coming out: the realisations she'd tried so hard to suppress.

"I don't know if there's room to be a _mother_ as well," she muttered, her tone dejected and low.

"It's a shame," John said. He took his eyes off the horizon and gazed deep into hers. "You'd make a great mom."

Heat bloomed in Sam's cheeks and she felt suddenly lightheaded. Embarrassed, she looked away but John stopped her by taking her hand in his and squeezing it.

"I mean it." John looked about as serious as he would when staring down the spear gun of a Wraith. "You always care beyond the call of duty. It's a part of you. If there's no room, you've always found a way to _make_ room." He paused, suddenly awkward. _'Like you did for us'_ seemed implied in his expression.

"It's not that easy. Especially not this time," Sam said with a trembling voice, her chest aching. "We don't have a fully functioning welfare system. Reika will need someone who can be there for her 24-7. I'd have to give up my work, my duty… The military's been my _life_ , John." Her voice nothing but a whisper, she added, "I don't know who I am without it."

_And there's Hailey too. There's no adoption process for her. She lost most of her friends in the Wraith attack. I can't leave her alone either, but I don't know how I could manage both—_

"We could find a way to make it work," John insisted, squeezing her hand. "You think you'd be the first working mom? Hell, Teyla managed it and Torren was a baby at the time. Now, Jackson and I, we'd help and I'd bet there're others as well. You could do it all if you want it."

"I—I—" Unable to come up with a good counter-argument, Sam looked at him. "What about you? You care too, John. You practically kill yourself to prove it."

John grimaced and his hand slipped out of hers. "I'm not dad material. Someone told me that long ago."

"Nancy?" Sam asked. The dark look on his face was answer enough. Shifting in her seat, Sam grabbed his hand and trapped it tightly between hers, not letting him get away. "Well, I cannot speak for the past, but I've seen you with Reika, John. You're great with her and she adores you. Besides, even if _I_ were to adopt her, you'd still be her—"

Sam stopped in her tracks. John had tensed even further. Their intertwined hands felt oddly disconnected and they both stared at them intensely.

"I'm sorry," Sam said in a hushed tone, tears welling up again. "That wouldn't exactly be one step at a time, would it?"

"If so, it'd be a huge one," John muttered dryly, which seemed like a good sign.

Still, his expression was strained and Sam knew the damage was already done. After all, they'd both agreed that _this time_ , they weren't going to muck it up. This time, they would get it right, even if it meant going at a snail's pace. However, if either of them adopted Reika now while things were the way they were…

Tears began to run down Sam's face and her whole body went cold. "We can't do it, can we?"

John met her eyes, his expression equally vulnerable and dejected. "I don't know."

* * *

**DAY 334**

Someone on the nursing staff had given Reika a proper haircut, Sam realized as she twirled tresses of incredibly soft hair between her fingers. That was good, she supposed, because she was terrible with anything less complicated than a tablet computer or a naquadah reactor.

Smiling gently, Sam caressed Reika's mop of hair, letting her thoughts wander. What would it have been like to see the girl every day instead of a stolen moment now and then whenever she was in the city? To have someone so small and vulnerable depend on you for everything? To be there in the good times and the bad times?

Janet had made that choice. She'd taken in Cassie, and Sam had lost count of the number of times her friend had complained about something teenage-related that'd taken Sam straight back to her own youth. Then again, she'd also lost count of the times Janet had gushed in pride and love over something Cassie had done or said, and the number of pictures that Janet had shown her of every conceivable situation.

 _But I'm not her. I shouldn't even be here. I don't deserve it._ Sam couldn't hold back her tears and sniffled loudly as her eyesight blurred. _I'm just any other horrible person: I'm choosing someone else. And worst of all, I'm choosing_ _ **something**_ _else. I'm my dad before he got cancer._

Squeezing her eyes shut, Sam wiped her cheeks and nose with her sleeve, not caring if it got snot all over it. Smiling again, her insides breaking at the sight of Reika's peaceful slumber, she smoothed the girl's hair to one side and leaned down to kiss her brow.

Reika didn't notice. Carefree and at peace in her dreams, she slumbered on far from the dangers in the waking world…far from _Sam_ , who in the morning would have to come clean about her impossible choice that left her feeling guilty for even being here and acting as if she cared.

_I'm such a horrible person. I—I should go to—_

"I'd like to do it."

Jostled out of her reverie, Sam stared up at Daniel, who stood in the doorway with a gentle smile on his face. Reika shifted, stirred by Sam's sudden movement, but soon quietened and continued to sleep.

Conscious of the sleeping child, Sam rose to her feet and approached Daniel. Her voice was hoarse when she spoke. "What?"

" _I'd_ like to adopt her," Daniel said simply, eying the little girl with a soft expression. "She's a terrific kid. Strong, brave, and full of fun. And she's been through so much. She deserves a home _here_ on Atlantis, because she's got people here that love her and want to be with her, and I can give her that. Well, _we_ can give her that. We're her family, after all."

Sam was speechless.

Daniel smirked when he saw the wide-eyed look on her face. "Besides, I've got time and more space than I need, and..." He hesitated suddenly and he reached out to take her hands in his, a flash of old pain lingering in his eyes. "She and I...we've both lost so much. So I'd like to do it, Sam. Please let me."

Sam flung herself at him and squeezed him tightly, a sob tearing through her trachea along with an overwhelming sensation of relief. "Thank God."

A chuckle vibrated in Daniel's chest as he hugged her back. "I guess I've been called worse."

"This is… this is…" The words came out in the jumble. Some stuck somewhere in her chest and Sam just tightened her hug instead. _"Thank you, thank you, thank you..."_

"I know," Daniel said gently, rubbing small circles on her back. "But whenever I want a night out on town, you and John are babysitting."

Sam chuckled and the sound was liberating.

* * *

It was finally comfortable in the darkness. No doctor voices on the radio. No bold white letters stating the price of freedom. No images. No feelings. She could just lie on her back on the hard mattress, lose track of time and place, and simply _be_.

That's all she wanted now. It wasn't an impossible demand. She'd done what was asked of her. She'd helped stop the Wraith from destroying Atlantis. She'd helped them get allies to count on in a tight spot. She'd done her duty.

But someone, apparently, hadn't gotten that memo. Someone was still coming around, pressing the doorbell as if it were a musical instrument and following up with the good-old-fashioned knock on the door for percussion. They wouldn't stop.

Every time it seemed so sudden, like a shot in the dark. In the beginning, it had rocked her out of her comfortable numbness and made her heart race and adrenaline pump through her veins. She'd gone from relaxed to tense in a heartbeat and it'd felt difficult to breathe, like her lungs had been ripped out with that sudden sound.

Now, she didn't move. She didn't respond. Her body remained numb. Her mind barely registered the sounds. When she finally reacted, it was mostly just to shift position so her back turned towards the door.

At least that someone hadn't tried breaking in. Not that it would work. She'd disconnected the power to the door by dislodging a panel in the wall and fiddling with the crystals. The only time she reconnected it was when she had to go on a food run, which was becoming rare. She just didn't have an appetite anymore. The numbness devoured it all.

Occasionally, she wondered what would happen if she let that someone in, but her mind never seemed to be able to hold that thought for long. After all, she knew the likely identity of the caller, and thinking about her…it made Hailey curl into a foetus position and squeeze her eyes shut against the lurking memories.

_They're gone, though. They're gone whenever she's not around. So it's for the best._

Hailey opened her eyes and stared into the darkness, letting the numbness do its work. No memories. No pain. Just her and the underground abyss, staring at each other.

_This is for the best. This is safe._

But somehow, the door opened. She heard the hum coming on in the darkness, then the door opened and light streamed inside. It hurt her eyes, so she brought up her hand to shield them.

As her eyes adjusted, she saw a silhouette in the doorway before the door closed again, and she knew.

_Blood trickling down her face from the ricochet wound. The weight of her body as Hailey carried Carter fireman style across the compound. The strain in Hailey's legs and quivering muscles as the guards caught sight of them. The will to run driven by the will to protect. The backhanded punch of the enemy's weapon—_

"Jenn." The Colonel's voice was soft like her footsteps as she found her way through the room. Somehow, she seemed to avoid hitting the scattered mess Hailey had created. Somehow, her presence radiated through the darkened room.

"No. No, no…" Hailey curled into a foetus position, holding her legs tightly against her chest. The memories washed over her uncontrollably.

_Rathorn raising a gun at the Colonel during the supposed trade meeting, explaining how they were going to be used as leverage, giving them no options. The Colonel refusing and Rathorn shifting the gun to Hailey, cocking it and ready to fire. Her pulse had begun to race even though this wasn't the first time she'd been threatened. Due to something she couldn't explain beyond the look in his eyes—_

A comforting hand grazed her shoulder tentatively. Hailey coiled more tightly, squeezing her eyes shut against the images flashing in her mind.

"No," she said. "Leave me alone. Go away, please. Don't…don't…"

_The Genii woman punched the Colonel in the face with her weapon. Then she pushed her across the bridge, into the water processing building on the other side…and then it wasn't her, but Rathorn moving his eyes towards her and his lips curling into a smirk as his finger touched the—_

"I'm not going anywhere, Jenn," the Colonel said lowly, solemnly, softly. Her grip tightened slightly, her fingers digging into Hailey's shoulder.

"No, please." She couldn't stop it now. The images. She couldn't…

_Reese complaining about caves as they stared out over the Genii capitol. Reese smirking at her, teasing her about mismatched socks in the middle of a 'retrieve information' mission. Reese holding her back in the Operations Centre. The Colonel staring at her knowingly. The guilt flashing in her veins that she'd contemplated, just for a moment, that dying would be okay… Then the numbness kicked in once more and all guilt was gone. Everything was gone until the computer told her the Wraith superhive was gone, and so were the infiltration teams._

"You're not alone, Jenn," the Colonel said. "I'm sorry it took awhile, but I'm here now. I'm not gonna leave you behind. …You're part of my family."

Riding through her memories, Hailey barely heard her, but she could feel the Colonel's hand on her shoulder. Firm yet gentle. Never letting go, not even when the darkness struggled back to devour her memories, and the numbness filled her again from top to toe.

She lost track of time eventually, but she didn't lose the sensation of the Colonel's hand gripping her like an anchor in a storm.

And, slowly, Hailey let her hand find its way to that anchor and grip it hard.

* * *

**DAY 345**

The pure look of excitement and happiness on Reika's face made him smile. It drove away the other indescribable feeling deep within him for a moment and told him that _this is right_. This is where she was supposed to be.

Jackson had decorated his quarters with as many colours as he could get his hands on. There was a huge banner with the words "WELCOME HOME, REIKA" splayed across it in slanted, slightly hurried handwriting. Drinks and a simple platter with cookies and sandwiches had been set out as well, and music was playing from a computer on his desk.

Standing by the drinks table, John looked around at all the people who'd come to celebrate the event. McKay and Keller sat on the couch, the latter seemingly admonishing the former for some snide remark he'd given Jackson. A couple of the nurses from the infirmary who'd grown close to Reika were there as well, one of them currently on the floor drawing a picture of a princess with Reika hanging over her in excitement. Jackson was talking with Teyla, who'd arrived with Wex and a few other Athosians earlier that day. There were also many faces John recognized as SGC veterans, scientists and military alike.

_It's been a long time since we've really celebrated anything. This is like bees to honey._

"Hiding by the drinks again?" Sam appeared next to him and picked up a glass of fruit juice. Her eyes were twinkling and John didn't miss the reference.

"Not every day Reika gets a name change," John said, smirking. As opposed to the Homeworld Command party, he felt more at ease in this setting. For one, there was a higher ratio of friendlier, not-stuck-up faces. "How was Hailey?"

"Better." Sam smiled and sipped her drink. "Today was a good day. Yesterday was not." She grimaced slightly. "But I think MacKenzie's finally getting through to her. They're working on a new approach, so I'm… I'm hopeful."

"He knows his stuff," John said, sensing Sam's slight hesitance. He reached out and touched her arm gently. "It'll take time, but she's on the road and she's letting you in, too."

"Yeah, I know." Reaching up to caress his hand with a brush of her thumb, Sam smiled again. "Thank you."

Warmth spreading through him, John let his hand fall naturally to his side and then grinned at her. "Guess who's been asking about her, though?" At her raised eyebrow, he added, "Ronon."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I was a bit surprised too. He's never said a word about her before." John took a chug of his own drink and glanced over at Reika, who was jumping up and down with her new princess drawing in her hands. "Times are really changing."

"It's a brave new world," Sam said with a smirk. "Speaking of which… I spoke to Caldwell earlier and he—"

She stopped, a groan escaped her lips, and she turned away with a hand on her earpiece radio.

When she finally turned back, John rolled his eyes. "Woolsey couldn't give you ten minutes to enjoy yourself?"

Sam grimaced. "There's a call from the Genii. I need to take it. Could you meet me at the balcony later?"

"Sure." Frowning, John gestured to Reika and Jackson, who were locked in conversation over her drawing next to Teyla. "Want me to run interference?"

"No, that's okay, I'll go explain to them."

Leaving her half-full glass behind, Sam went over to Jackson and Reika and stood talking with them for a short while. Then she gave Reika a tight hug, kissed the top of her head and left.

In her wake, John's mind ran the image of those two together over and over in his head and he felt, for the tiniest moment, a sharp jab of regret for what might have been.

* * *

The sun was setting on the horizon when John arrived, the oceans and towers of Atlantis glittering with brilliant red and yellow light. Sam turned to meet him, a big smile on her face to cover up the jittery bunch of butterflies in her stomach. He was wearing a soft smile of his own that he eventually shook off and replaced with his familiar cocky smirk.

"Long and tedious call?" John asked as he came to stand next to her, staring out at the breath-taking view that always drew them back to this particular spot, day after day, year after year.

"In a manner of speaking," Sam said, rolling her eyes. "Radim was concerned about some technicalities in the final draft of the treaty document. Then _Woolsey_ was concerned, and next moment Caldwell dropped by." She sighed. "I'll be happy once we've finally signed that dratted document… Then I can get back to the usual order of the day with invading aliens and impending scientific or natural-born disasters."

"I've asked Woolsey to put up a permanent 'Hazardous' sign next to McKay. Hopefully it'll save us some time and effort."

Chuckling, Sam reached out to grasp John's hand. The privacy of the balcony made her bold and she ignored the flutters of butterflies that peaked when he squeezed her hand with a gentle smile.

"Anyway, Caldwell had nothing new to report," Sam said. "The Wraith are still quiet. No attacks, no nothing. But…that's not the news I wanted to share with you."

Grinning at John's confused look, she found a black case in her pocket and handed it to him. He let go of her hand to open it and then froze, eyes wide in shock.

"Caldwell and I agreed it's time you joined the selected few," Sam said with a smile and reached out to unfasten the silver oak leaves on John's collar and replace them with the silver birds in the case. Once done, she stepped back and gave him a curt nod in formal address. _"Colonel."_

John was staring at her the whole time, then reached up to brush his fingers across the markings on the birds' wings when she was done, his brows furrowed. "This is…"

"We've talked about doing it for some time, actually, but the whole business with Dawkins put a wrench in it. With Caldwell on the _Daedalus_ and me either on Tirana or on ambassadorial duties, we figured there'd be a need for a Colonel on Atlantis," Sam explained. "Woolsey signed off on the paperwork this morning. There'll be a formal ceremony, of course, but… It's official."

John arced an eyebrow at her. "You sure this is a good idea?"

"I've never doubted you, John." Sam picked imaginary lint off his shoulders and then straightened in a more professional manner, her voice serious. "You'll find that it can be a heavy burden, though. There are things you'll learn, things no longer above your paygrade, such as what might have happened to the _Odyssey_ , and there are things you'll need to take part in, such as rebuilding the military for the future."

"Rebuilding?" John's confusion deepened.

Sam nodded. "Most of the people on Atlantis are military." She paused, her insides beginning to flutter in a _definite_ non-professional manner. "Keller told me once that we'll have to start making babies. I think it goes without saying that we'll need a new set of military framework if we're gonna build a society here. Or else we're gonna have to pair every soldier with a civilian and I can't imagine that going over well..."

At that, John's confusion vanished and his eyes twinkled in amusement. "So then I can finally wear my leather jacket to work?"

" _That's_ the first thing on your mind?" Laughing, Sam swatted his arm but John caught her hand and pulled her closer with a promising smirk.

"Not the first thing," John said, snaking his arms around the small of her back. "Still… One step at a time, right? Can't imagine Caldwell letting us have a say in things if we're already, um, together."

Sam grinned. Although they'd made important steps to mend their relationship, there were still intimate thresholds they hadn't crossed. And although this was really just another beginning as Daniel had said, and they had no clue what new disaster might happen tomorrow, she felt truly, bone-deep _happy_ for the first time in a long, long while.

So she hugged him close, whispered "Definitely" into his ear, dropped a kiss on his cheek and stepped back to a respectable distance to simply take his hand in hers. Smiling, John squeezed it in return.

And that was enough for now. After all, they _did_ have time.

* * *

 _"There is no decision that we can make that doesn't come with some sort of balance or sacrifice."_ – **Simon Sinek**

* * *

 **Next and epilogue:** "...that is forever [Earth]."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final chapter for your enjoyment! Epilogue to follow... Thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed, story alerted and favourited this story over the years. Words cannot describe my gratefulness and appreciation for your continued support and readership. As always, I appreciate constructive feedback.


	28. Epilogue - Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As they say, there is a time for everything. After all else has passed, the time has finally come for peace, and like everything else, “peace is a journey of a thousand miles and [...] must be taken one step at a time.” 
> 
>  
> 
> (Quote by Lyndon B. Johnson)

****

* * *

**Epilogue, Part 1 | “…that is forever [Earth]”**

_Prompt: a time for peace_

_Music: “Winter Ghosts” by JBM; “I Asked for Love” by Lisa Gerrard and Patrick Cassidy; “A Small Measure of Peace” by Hans Zimmer (_ The Last Samurai) _; “Mhysa” by Ramin Djawadi, (_ Games of Thrones: Season 3) _; “The Path (A New Beginning)” by Gustavo Santaolalla, (_ The Last of Us)

* * *

 _“Peace is a journey of a thousand miles and it must be taken one step at a time.”_ **– Lyndon B. Johnson**

* * *

**November 10 th, 2009 – A few weeks after the Wraith attack **

Two weeks in isolation and four days of self-imposed starvation had finally put its mark on Shen Xiaoyi. Her shoulders were slumped, her face was gaunt, her eyes were dull and she’d lost weight. According to Keller, Xiaoyi was resisting nearly all types of nutrition, only allowing herself water to drink.

“Why starve?” Letting his folders lie unopened on the table, Woolsey gave Xiaoyi a level stare.

There was no response and he hadn’t really expected one. Nevertheless, he held back a sigh and thought of a time when things had been different.

“Okay,” he said. “Let us begin.”

Woolsey glanced at his two companions, who had been chosen by citywide vote to represent the military and the civilians respectively; they had both managed to stay neutral in the earlier internal strife. Major Hudson was a medic veteran from the former SGC, while Dr Bryce was one of Atlantis’ original Expedition scientists.

Bryce turned on a recorder, put it down in front of them, and stated, “Case #26-09: Shen Xiaoyi versus the People. Interview on November 10th, 2009. It is 09:35 Atlantis standard time.”

Woolsey nodded his thanks and settled his eyes on Xiaoyi, who was staring dully at a point next to his head. “In previous interviews, you have explained the following: the Chinese government’s plan to use Atlantis as a new, mobile base in the Milky Way from which to rebuild Earth society and fight back the alien invasion force. This was an order given to you through the captain of and the logs on the _Sun Tzu._ To this end, you initiated plans under false pretences to stock up on resources and provisions for the trip to Earth, to upgrade the city’s defences, and to fix the city’s Wormhole Drive, an Ancient transportation project that had been dismissed by its creators.”

He paused for effect, but there was none. Xiaoyi remained silent and dull.

Woolsey continued, reading from the papers in his folder, “You have further explained that while some of your followers were privy to your full plans, such as Dr Takahashi, others did not know the full extent of them. We’ve received statements from for instance Lieutenant Colonel Dawkins, who claims you told him that Earth was not destroyed at all and that the previous leadership had covered up the truth on orders from Homeworld Command.” He paused and glanced at Xiaoyi. “You have not denied the validity of these claims.”

And she didn’t now, either. For all intents and purposes, Xiaoyi had not tried to cover up what she’d done…until five days ago when he’d confronted her with a certain missing database entry. Then she’d stopped answering questions, refused to eat and started to become a shell of the tiger she’d once been.

“Well, this brings us to the next item on the list.” Woolsey narrowed his eyes. “The Aleirians.”

A lock of hair fell into Xiaoyi’s face. She didn’t move, but her eyes seemed to spark for a fraction of a second. It was enough.

“According to witnesses, after the incident on Aleira, you received a case from the Tikwa Administration. It was given to you by Envoy Ypresa.” Straightening in his seat, Woolsey folded his hands on top of each other. “One of the witnesses claims the contents were of Ancient design: data crystals that were vital for the Wormhole Drive as the ones on Atlantis had either been removed or destroyed and could not be replaced or reconfigured by our more generic crystals.”

“We have studied the inventory logs,” Bryce said, “and found traces of doctoring. Those crystals weren’t the only things you brought into this city.” She picked up a piece of paper and showed it to Xiaoyi, whose eyes had become unfocused. “For the most part, they’re simple construction components. Wires, crystals, and the like. But those particular crystals you received from the Administration…they are unique. They could only have been found in another city-ship.”

Xiaoyi shifted. It was a minute action, but an action nevertheless. They were reaching her, perhaps helped by the fact that her starvation had weakened her already. It might be unethical to rely on it, but Woolsey reminded himself that she _was_ fully aware that she had a right to remain silent. 

“There was an entry in the Atlantis database of a city-ship called Dagda that disappeared during the Wraith-Ancient war,” Woolsey said evenly. “It has been removed now, but I remember the story clearly. The city was lost on the planet we know as Aleira. One possibility was a Wraith attack, the other a volcanic eruption, or perhaps it was both. We do not know.” He paused, tensing his fingers for a moment. “However, if their shields worked, it would have been theoretically possible for the city to have survived while being covered in lava. And if they did, it would have been possible to dig its way into it to retrieve…whatever had survived.”

“We are planning to confirm that once the current eruption has calmed down,” Hudson supplied, speaking up calmly. “For now, some of the Aleirians we helped evacuate have stated that the Tikwa Administration has been interested in their mountains for years, and they allowed the Tikwee to send many scientific expeditions to _‘study’_ the volcano.” His inflection clearly signified that what the Tikwee had done was probably anything but studying.

But the implication was worse. If Dagda was buried too close to the volcano, using explosives or digging to get to it could potentially trigger an early eruption; the volcano could still have slumbered on for decades before another volcanic event. If that were the case…those behind the digging were also responsible for the innocent natives that had been lost in the consequent eruption.

Xiaoyi’s face paled and she looked as if she had to be sick. She shifted again, more visibly this time, and her eyes flickered to Woolsey’s. It was a change from the last interview, but at the time they hadn’t been as close to acquiring the needed evidence as they were now. The noose was probably tightening and she was feeling it.

They needed that. They needed her confession. It wasn’t just about justice, but also about their relationship with the Tikwa Administration. Their mining operations on Tirana depended on it. It wasn’t as if they could just stride in and accuse their economic allies of brutality, or potential dubious connections, without evidence.

Woolsey narrowed his eyes. “Whose plan was it? The Administration or Envoy Ypresa?”

Looking away, Xiaoyi reached up to touch her throat. She swallowed visibly, her eyes closing for a second while she appeared to hold back something foul-tasting.

_Now._

Woolsey leaned forward, staring at her without blinking. “Did you know Ypresa and her family are dead?”

Xiaoyi startled. Her eyes burst open and she glanced at him in shock.  

“They were found by the Tikwa stargate eight days ago. Apparently, their bodies showed clear signs of having been fed upon,” Woolsey continued, recalling the details the new Envoy had given him in their last trade meeting three days ago. The man had seemed unsettled by the news he brought and anxious about Woolsey’s reaction.  

“ _The Administration_ believes it to be a message from someone with whom Ypresa had consorted,” Hudson said, picking up where Woolsey left off. “Apparently, they have found evidence of long-time embezzlement and numerous unscheduled off-world trips that point to Ypresa having certain _friends_ elsewhere. Add the fact that multiple devices and parts of Ancient design were found prepped for shipping in a factory she administered…”

“…As well as the fact that Ypresa and her family disappeared from the Tikwa home world with all their riches about a week before Atlantis was attacked by the Wraith,” Bryce added, narrowing her eyes, “And we have all these _coincidences_ that, when looking more closely at them, seem very little coincidental at all.”

Twirling a pen between his fingers, Woolsey gave Xiaoyi a hard stare. “This isn’t a time to be a martyr, Shen, or a time for your personal demons. The theories brought forth by the Administration are just that: theories. But they suggest something far more devastating, namely how the Wraith learned of Atlantis’ location when we had taken every precaution to limit that knowledge.” He paused, unconsciously clenching his hands on top of the table. “We need to know the depth of the Administration’s involvement on Aleira, so I ask you again: Whose plan was it?”

“Ypresa,” Xiaoyi said hoarsely, raising her chin slightly to meet him at eye level. Her face had gone white. “The Administration didn’t know the real reason behind the evacuation. It was her personal agenda. I assumed she was doing research or selling the Ancient devices on the black market, but…”

Exhaling a deep breath, Woolsey felt the tension leave his neck. “But you didn’t ask, because you were in the same position as her.”

Tears welled up in Xiaoyi’s eyes and she lowered her head in shame.

“Very well.” Straightening in his seat, Woolsey glanced to his two companions. Bryce gave him a nod of approval and Hudson a level stare. “Interview suspended at 09:53 Atlantis standard time, to be resumed in 15 minutes.”

He reached out to stop the recorder while Bryce and Hudson got silently to their feet. After they’d left, Woolsey turned back to Xiaoyi with an appraising look.

The powerful enigma that’d been Shen Xiaoyi was gone. Only her demons remained, weighing her down so heavily that she seemed nothing more than a small mouse.

“James let his grief be the end of him,” Woolsey said lowly, almost gently. “You nearly let yours be the end of _us._ ” He paused, hesitating. “But starving yourself as penance will not make up for what your actions have done. You were the leader of this city for several months, Shen. What secrets you know, you must share. For _our_ future…”

Slowly, Woolsey rose to his feet. Xiaoyi raised her head to stare at him, tears freely running down her face, and Woolsey felt a familiar ache of pity and _caring_ in the pit of his stomach.

“We were colleagues, Shen. I hope that, at times, you knew that we were also friends.”

Xiaoyi closed her eyes, lips twisted as if holding back something painful…but this time he knew it wasn’t something bad. It was that piercing, exposed, horrible gut-wrenching storm of grief that everyone in Atlantis shared because of the loss of Earth, and he was witnessing its emergence.

Finally.

* * *

**Christmas Day, 2009**

As Sam walked through the dim hallways of Atlantis, breathing in recycled air, touching the cold metal walls and glancing at the few Christmas ornaments that someone had painstakingly made and put up, she was alone.

She took that as a good sign. Perhaps the one-year memorial service and the speeches and the hugs and the music (and the booze) had been enough to ease people’s minds. Perhaps they were sleeping peacefully in their beds; finally unafraid of the threats they had encountered and beaten in the past year.

At least she could hope that were the case. There were still reports and stories of people who struggled. She could understand that. Some days were good, others weren’t. Grief didn’t have an expiration date. You had to go through the stages, even though the stages didn’t necessarily go the way you planned or in the order you expected. Some days you were angry, some days you pleaded, some days you accepted the way things were. That was just another aspect of life.

Coming around the corner, Sam arrived at her destination and froze. The numbness she’d felt all day as she went through the motions wavered and it was difficult to breathe past the sudden lump in her throat.

The Memorial Wall was covered in a collage of mismatched photos, letters, drawings and assorted items. At intervals, someone had lit candles and it had become an unspoken rule that they should never go out. Whether late at night or early morning, they were supposed to remain a silent vigil, flickering in the small draft from people passing by. Seeing as she didn’t have the ATA gene for Atlantis to respond to, the candles were her only source of light in the hallway.

Slowly, her chest beginning to tremble in anticipation of her tears, Sam walked to the middle of the wall. There, above the wall-mounted tablet computer where personnel photos of people who had died or gone MIA since the Evacuation were displayed, were written the words she’d seen on similar memorials at some point or another in her long military career.

_“Here we remember the price of freedom.”_

Sam reached out to touch the writing, which was made out of shimmering metal created here in this very city from material mined from Tirana. It was beautifully done. Far more beautiful than she’d expected when they’d first unveiled it. She didn’t know why, but it’d touched her heartstrings in some way. Given her hope. Made her see the city and its survivors in a new light.

A smile crossed her lips despite the fresh tears welling up in her eyes, despite the hollow sensation in the pit of her stomach that always seemed unsatisfied in moments like this.

With shaking hands, Sam pulled four folded pictures from her pocket: one of Cassie, one of the General, one of her brother’s family…and one of SG-1. She picked a relatively empty spot and tacked them in-between the other pictures so that only their smiling, happy faces were visible.

And then she was no longer Colonel Carter, former Commander of Atlantis. She was Sam: friend, sister, aunt and godmother, and a sob ripped painfully through her body, shredding her throat, leaving her more alone than she’d ever felt in her life.

* * *

John stirred awake to the sound of his door closing. Squinting, his mind fuddled, he looked up. Sam was but a silhouette against the backdrop of silver moonlight streaming in from the window behind her. Even without seeing her face clearly, he could see her hesitate.

He shifted on the bed so that he could face her. “You okay?”

“… No.” Her voice was low, vulnerable, hurting. 

Something within him responded automatically. John sat up, skin turning cold as the sheets fell down to his waist. He then scooted sideways and patted the empty spot beside him, rubbing the last traces of sleep from his eyes.

Sam wavered but accepted his invitation in the end. Although fully dressed, she was shivering when she sat down. Hesitating only for a moment, John pulled her close and covered her with one of his sheets.

The rough material of her uniform chafed his bare skin, but John didn’t care. As she laid her head on his shoulder, sniffling loudly several times in a poor attempt to restrain her shuddering sob, he hugged her tightly and kissed her brow. It was the best he could do. Words, especially today of all days, failed him.

John held her until Sam had cried herself to exhaustion, and then left her on his bed to fetch a glass of water. As he drank it, he found an old, faded picture he’d kept hidden away in his wallet for a long time and held it up in the ray of moonlight from the window.

Two young boys and their father grinned back at him, standing on the putting green with their putters proudly in their hands. The father had his hands on either boy’s shoulder. Staring at it now, John could almost remember the sense of security that hand had once brought.

His chest aching oddly, John brushed his thumb across the taller boy’s face and wondered if this was how Sam felt when she thought of her lost brother.

Then, unable to look at it anymore, John put the picture back in his wallet and found his way back to Sam and her soothing warmth.

Sleep didn’t find him easily again that night, but at least she was there with him. At least he wasn’t alone. That was all that mattered.

* * *

**December 27 th, 2009**

The breeze coming in from an open window cooled her skin. A bee-like bug buzzed around the windowpane, crashing against the glass. Hailey stared at its lack of progress. What was the point? Why did it keep trying to get out? She knew it wouldn’t. It’d tried yesterday too. Even with the window open, it hadn’t managed to get out.

The buzzing continued. Hailey’s eyes remained on the bug, even as the door to her quarters opened and someone stepped inside.

Heavy, slow footsteps sounded on the metal floor. A shadow landed across her face, but Hailey didn’t blink. For a long while, nothing was said. The newcomer just stared at her staring at the bug trying to get out.

Then, the presence squatted down next to her bed. The gruff voice was a familiar baritone. “Time to get moving, Captain. Break’s over. New session with MacKenzie today.”

Hailey blinked, but didn’t move. Distantly, she knew this was one of her bad days. Normally she could get herself to the sessions, but not today. Today, something held her back. She didn’t know what, though. She rarely did.

With a barely concealed grunt, the visitor rose and started to bustle around her quarters. Hailey heard cabinets open and close, the rustle of clothes, and more of those heavy, familiar footsteps.

Suddenly, something landed across her feet. It was heavy and soon joined by more. Hailey turned her head slightly. A heap of clothes was piling up at the end of her bed. Ronon was gathering more, also locating her shoes and dropping them unceremoniously on the floor next to her bed.

“Get up.” Ronon’s command brooked not argument. Done with finding the necessary equipment, he stood in one place, arms crossed. His eyes narrowed when she didn’t make a move. “ _Get up,_ Captain _._ ”

Hailey turned her head back to the window and stared at the bug. It was still crashing into the glass, albeit closer to the opening than before. She didn’t say anything.

A rough hand grabbed her blanket and jerked it away, leaving Hailey lying in just her standard underwear: shorts and a tank top. Goosebumps rose on her flesh at the sudden loss of warmth, but she still didn’t move.

“Have it your way,” Ronon said and got hold of her shoulders, forcibly pulling her into a sitting position.

She let him do it, slumping forward and staring at the floor as he continued his ministrations. Ronon’s feet were large. She’d never noticed.

As if from a distance, Hailey felt Ronon lift her arm and carefully, almost tenderly, pull a shirtsleeve on it, followed soon by its brother on the other side. Her eyes focused on the texture of Ronon’s dreadlocks as he buttoned down her shirt, then on the coarse hairs peeking out from his neckline as he pulled on her socks and pants. He pulled her up to her feet and dragged her pants over her bum, fastening her shirt within, then sat her back down and started putting on her shoes. Hailey’s eyes went to his beard: dark and coarse like the rest of his hair, yet neatly trimmed.

Once the shoelaces were tied, Ronon pulled her to her feet again and looked at her critically. She barely met his eyes, nor paid him any more mind as he found a rubber band and collected her hair into what felt like a lopsided and messy ponytail.

“Time to go, Captain.” Ronon’s voice still brooked no argument.

Hailey swayed slightly on her feet, her head swimming with the rising blood pressure from having gotten to a standing position so quickly. She looked back at the bug again. It was still struggling against the glass, and it resonated within her.  

Then, before Hailey could react, Ronon leaned down, caught hold of her legs and swung her unceremoniously over his shoulder. Her world turned upside down and bumpy as Ronon walked to the door, opened it and went outside.

The light of the Atlantis corridor was glaringly bright compared to her quarters, stabbing her eyes, but the sensation drifted to the background as a memory appeared out of the darkness of her mind. He’d carried her like this on their first mission together. Then, like now, the action had annoyed her.

“This isn’t the Stone Age, Ronon. I can walk myself.”

The words weren’t passionate, not like back then, but they nevertheless elicited a reaction from Ronon. “Prove it.”

Hailey sighed as Ronon stopped. With some effort, she started shimmying down from his shoulder until she stood swaying on her feet once more, the world spinning a little from a rush of blood to her head. Ronon’s hand steadied her as she slowly raised her head to finally meet his eyes.

“See?” she said. “A modern woman.”

Ronon smirked, and then nudged her on. “Come on, ‘modern woman’. Food, then MacKenzie.”

Hailey didn’t protest. She just followed his lead.

And later that day, when she returned to her quarters drained and weary and saw that the bug was gone, she smiled.

* * *

**January 7 th, 2010**

How easy Pegasus history changed with just a touch. A tablet computer was passed from Chief Radim to Councillor Treya to Richard Woolsey, each putting their thumb and signature on the screen. The alliance treaty would be printed out and given to each leader in turn, phrased in their original language by Atlantis’ resident linguists.

No longer just trading partners. Now, they stood together should either be attacked by the Wraith again. They had proved it could be done. In addition, they had agreed to exchange resources and expertise in order to help each other improve social, medical and military conditions, the details of which were outlined in the treaty document.

For now, their first goal was to build two more Ascalons so that each homeworld was protected from the Wraith; Atlantis already had theirs in orbit again, despite the fact that the Wraith seemed to steer well clear of them after the failed attack. The up-and-running dyson ring would continue to be a coordinative effort and would, for now, power all three Ascalons, as the chances for the Wraith making a coordinated strike against all three homeworlds was minimal.

Accepting the tablet computer from Woolsey, Sam added her thumbprint and signature above the headline ‘Mediator’. Then she looked up and smiled.

“ _Please_ tell me it’s time for drinks now,” Larrin said immediately. Next to her, John rolled his eyes excessively. On the other side, Treya shot her a disapproving look. Some of the Genii representatives accompanying Radim looked offended, but Radim himself only smiled briefly. It wasn’t the first outburst they’d heard from Larrin in these talks, and he seemed to appreciate her candour.

Woolsey cleared his throat and donned his best diplomatic expression. “On Earth, it is customary to let the guests have a chance to freshen up or relax before the formal dinner. We have prepared quarters for you should you like to do so.”

“Thank you, Mr Woolsey.” Treya rose to her feet, followed by her fellow Traveler representatives and then the rest of the people around table. “We accept your offer.”

“As do we,” Radim said. He’d paled a little when standing up and now seemed very tired despite his polite smile. Massan, ever at his side, looked a bit concerned. “I am afraid my stamina is not what it once was.”

Sam gestured to the conference room doors, which opened at the wave of her hand. “If you’ll follow—“

“Gladly.” Larrin grinned as she passed behind John, who suddenly jerked and turned to glare at her. One of his hands moved surreptitiously towards his buttocks before it halted and fisted instead. The Traveler, however, had already moved on with a large, teasing grin on her face. As she passed Sam, she actually _winked._

Shaking her head in resignation, Sam turned to Radim, who was one of the last to leave; Woolsey, the Travelers and the other Genii representatives apart from Massan had already exited the room. “Dr Keller is also available should you like to see her, Chief Radim.”

“Thank you for your consideration, Colonel Carter, but I will be fine.” Radim smiled, erasing some of his tired facial lines. He gestured to his hair, which had been cut short a few weeks ago to correspond with the patches of hair he’d lost during treatment and was growing back. “The radiation treatment has worked very well. I am stronger each day.”

“That’s good to hear,” Sam said, smiling back, and gestured towards the open doors through which the rest of Radim’s entourage had left.

They exited together, exchanging polite pleasantries, and then Sam left him, Massan and the Genii entourage in the care of Airman Polinski and two other security escorts. She watched them leave down the grand staircase in direction of the transporter, and then glanced sideways at John, who’d been waiting for her.

John spoke first, his voice nothing more than a mutter. “I swear, if she doesn’t start keeping her hands to herself…”

Sam smirked. “Then she wouldn’t be Larrin.”

“You’re defending her now?” John gave her an annoyed glare, crossing his arms defensively across his chest.

“Only because I’m no longer threatened by her.” With a gentle touch, Sam grasped John’s arm and met his glare with a smile. “We still on for movie night?”

With a touch of melodrama, John heaved a sigh and shrugged. “I guess. Since you insist.”

It earned him a sharp jab in the side that made him yelp and rub the sore spot with a grumble. Sam only grinned, feeling as if they were finally back to where they were before the Evacuation. She loved the feeling.

* * *

**February 8 th, 2010**

Another loud _ping_ issued from Woolsey’s computer and the man noted the action with a deep sigh.

“I know the feeling,” Caldwell said simply, glancing up from his own laptop computer.

“I am tempted to implement a restriction on how many messages the science department can send each day. Either that or I’m going to need a secretary to screen my calls.” Rolling his eyes, Woolsey turned away from the laptop in front of him. “Anyway, back to the matter at hand… How serious is it?”

“Overall?” Caldwell did the calculations in his head. “We’re looking at about 10 % drop in military personnel since December. That’s on top of those who are currently undergoing medical and psychological treatment, serving disciplinary actions or have been given administrative discharges. Overall, it leaves us at about 60 % combat effectiveness.”

Woolsey’s eyes widened. “So many have decided to quit?”

 _I’d rather have half our original strength than have soldiers in our ranks that refuse to follow direct orders or don’t have their heads in the game,_ Caldwell thought quietly. Aloud, he said, “We’ll make do for now. In the near future, however, we should consider recruiting off world. This ‘ _reproduction’_ policy you and the council have condoned won’t bring enough new blood into our ranks for at least two decades. In fact, it’ll bring our combat effectiveness even further down once the female soldiers go off on maternity leave.”

Caldwell resisted the urge to fist his hand in annoyance. Even though he knew the Council’s reproduction policy was the only way to go if they were to survive as a society, he didn’t like the military being weakened like this. It was just another reminder that they were in a clusterfuck without Earth to back them up.

On the plus side, though, it meant the scientists were beginning to research ways to make the remaining soldiers more efficient despite low numbers, McKay and Zelenka’s latest project being improved body armour based on Vanir suit designs.

Sighing, Caldwell said, “Bringing in recruits now would shorten that to two years. In addition, we should train everyone on this base in the use of weaponry and basic tactics. Even the scientists and politicians should be able to defend this base from any potential incursions.”

 _The Genii and the Travelers might be our allies and train with us for now, but history should warn us to be prepared for anything, including a double-cross._ Caldwell knew that thought wouldn’t sit well with Carter and Sheppard, but he was a pragmatic at heart and he had seniority. They would listen to him.

“I see,” Woolsey said, nodding grimly. “I’ll bring the topic up on the next council meeting. There will be some protests, I’m sure, but I’ll stand behind your decision one hundred per cent. Caution has served us well in the past, as you and Colonel Carter’s actions against the Wraith proved.” He paused and gave Caldwell a pensive look. “Speaking of which, I understand you, Carter and Sheppard are laying the finishing touches to the new fraternisation framework.”

“We are.” This time, Caldwell was unable to resist fisting his hand. A grimace also touched his lips briefly. “However, I’ve been informed to expect some bias.”

“Oh?” Woolsey raised an eyebrow, leaning forward slightly on his desktop, then seemed to realise what wasn’t being said and nodded slowly. “Oh. Well, it is perhaps only natural. They’ve worked closely together for several years, and the past year has been…extraordinary.”

“You suspected then?” Caldwell wasn’t sure whether that fact angered him or not. He hadn’t seen it. Probably hadn’t been close enough to see it, but thinking back, though…he nevertheless felt like a fool. He should’ve seen it. Why else did their falling out have such a long-lasting effect? They were both professionals. They were both military. Discipline should’ve kept their heads on the job, but it hadn’t, at least not until Carter was shipped off to Tirana.

“I wondered,” Woolsey said diplomatically, though a secret smile seemed to touch the corners of his lips. When Caldwell glanced at him sharply, he added, “While on Tirana, I saw many things; some I deemed important and some I deemed less so. My focus was on Atlantis’ survival. Everything else took a back seat.”

 _They broke the rules, though,_ Caldwell wanted to say. _If this had been Earth, they would’ve been court-martialled and kicked out of the Air Force. Technically, the rules are still in effect._

 _‘But they’re not alone,’_ another part of him said. _‘Who knows how many have sought comfort in each other this past year? Extreme circumstances drive people together. You know that. Besides, we’re already short of seasoned commanders and at reduced combat effectiveness. We can’t lose anyone else.’_

As such, Caldwell said aloud, “The past is the past,” as a way of concession, though the words felt bitter and sour.

“Indeed it is.” Lips blossoming into a half-smile, Woolsey nodded with approval, then sat back more calmly in his chair and picked up a new stack of papers. “I realise we have difficult times ahead, Colonel, but we will get through them as we have gone through the previous ones. And hopefully, at the end, we’ll be able to look back and be proud of what we have accomplished under the circumstances.”

As his laptop _pinged_ with a third new message in the last ten minutes, Woolsey paused and pinched the ridge of his nose in an attempt to restrain his annoyance. “And my first accomplishment will be to find a way to reroute McKay’s messages to someone else.”

* * *

**March 14 th, 2010**

“I still say cloning might be a viable option,” John said with his mouth still stuffed with food. Swallowing, he picked up his cup of coffee and waved it a little in the air with a slight smirk. “We’ll be back at 100 % combat effectiveness in no time and can finally chase down that bastard Rathorn and his goons.”

Enjoying her own morning coffee more leisurely, Sam rolled her eyes. “One, that’s ripping off Star Wars, John. Two, the Genii wanted to take care of that business themselves. We’ve already offered our help and they said no.”

“And there’s not an inch of you that wouldn’t relish the opportunity to tear Rathorn a new one?” All serious now, John’s eyes narrowed as he put his cup down with a little too much force. “He shot Hailey. He wanted to sell _you_ to the Wraith. That’s _after_ he’d roughed you up first. He could’ve—”

“Yes, he could have done worse,” Sam interjected, slightly annoyed. She gave John a hard look. “I’ve been captured before, John. I’m familiar with what can be and has been done, especially to women. Believe me, what Rathorn was able to do to me doesn’t compare to what the Goa’uld or Fifth have done in the past.”

“And you say that without batting an eye,” John countered, frowning. Some of the fire diminished in his eyes as he shook his head and sighed. “Remind me again: Why are we still doing this job?”

Sighing too, Sam contemplated John’s words for a moment, then decided the topic was too heavy to pursue right now, especially since she was due back on Tirana for her shift soon. Instead, she cocked an eyebrow at him and attempted to defuse the tension. “Wanna make a break for it? We could be at the other side of the galaxy in an hour.”

Chuckling slightly, John leaned back somewhat heavily in his chair. “Tempting. I always wondered what that side would be like.” He paused and smirked at her. “Don’t know about you, but I think it’s about time we find a society that’s been able to develop a DeLorean or an inline-four engine motorcycle. Been too long since I’ve felt the wind in my face at 80 mph.”

Sam smiled softly at the look of reminiscence on John’s face. “Yeah… Some days, I still miss my Indian and the long, open roads in Colorado. Really took the edge off things.”

John smirked more widely. “If you’d approved my requisition at the time…”

Sam rolled her eyes. He was referring to before the Evacuation when, after learning of her similar passion for motorcycles, he’d promptly handed her a requisition order for two motorcycles and claimed it was a vital spare time activity for the Atlantis personnel. He’d wanted to establish a racing track on one of the piers and have an annual tournament for those interested.

“Long shot, John, and you knew it,” Sam said, smiling. “But now I know I should’ve fought harder. Who knows if we’ll ever have the time, resources or the need to create something like that? Not that many places to ride a bike.”

John’s smile slipped. “And here I was trying to get our minds on something cheerful.” He sighed. “Guess the world’s really changed, huh?”

“If it hadn’t, though, I wouldn’t be able to do this.” Reaching out, Sam grasped John’s hand openly, without fear of persecution, and smiled sadly. “That’s something, at least. Despite everything.”

John’s expression softened as he squeezed her hand in return. “True.”

* * *

**April 24 th, 2010**

As she weaved her way through the thick crowd headed in the opposite direction for lunch, Shen Xiaoyi couldn’t quench a deep-rooted flash of annoyance at the shoulders and elbows bumping inconsiderately into her.

Once, people stepped aside in the corridor for her to pass and darkened her doorstep to gain her favour. Now, she was no one: the pariah no one but a few devotees dared approach in public, doomed to a diminished life in the shadows after a highly publicised hearing that discredited her actions and, by extension, beliefs. Always watched, always under scrutiny, but never spoken to unless necessary.

For the most part, Shen didn’t really care anymore. She rarely ventured outside her quarters anyway, except to visit the mess hall and the stasis pods, and for her community duties.

The latter was Woolsey’s doing, a decision made either out of pity or out of some desire to keep her busy so as to avoid the same fate as met James Coolidge; she didn’t know which. All she knew was that he was one of the few who still took the time to talk with her, or at least try to; she didn’t always take part in the conversation.

Though the suggestion that she was susceptible to committing suicide annoyed her to no end – she would _never_ do as James had done – she nevertheless found some comfort in her community duties, which involved translating for the Chinese survivors recovering under Keller and MacKenzie’s care, and teaching them English so they could partake in society.

Pushing past the stragglers of the crowd, Shen was able to breathe again. She glanced back with annoyance at the backs of the lunch crowd disappearing around the corner, then turned and walked away with slow, measured steps.

When solitude surrounded her, though, her thoughts grew solemn, the annoyance from before disappeared, and her steps faltered slightly.

 _So much has changed, Baba,_ Shen thought inwardly, picturing the face of her father standing before her with familiar stoicism. Her mental image of him had been her only company while in isolation last November, and he’d stayed with her ever since, like a ghost of Christmas past.

 _Atlantis is changed._ The tension had lessened after her hearing, at least publicly. There was a more relaxed atmosphere in the city. More smiles and laughter, children running in the halls, even two babies being born. There was less fear of the Wraith and new incursions. With the Alliance treaty signed and Traveler ships bringing in resources, a shared sense of optimism had spread, at least among the majority now in support of Atlantis taking a more active role in Pegasus. Among the minority, there were still seeds of discontent, even mutters of new actions being taken unless more conservative measures were won through on a political level. Woolsey had his work cut out for him.

 _I am changed too._ Although a few of her former supporters urged her to keep fighting and to return to politics, Shen recognised defeat when it stared her in the face. She’d suffered an act of public shaming. Despite her years spent living among Americans, her deeply ingrained upbringing didn’t allow her any relief from the accompanying sense of shame and dishonour. Instead, she felt like a child again, seeking a parent’s atonement for her sins.

Pausing in the middle of the hallway, Shen stared out through a nearby window at the bright sunny day outside. Her chest felt hollow and tears threatened to well up in her eyes as she thought back to happier times with her family, when she was still a child and didn’t have to worry about how to survive the end of it all.

And for a moment, she wished to be that child again.

* * *

**May 17 th, 2010**

A prolonged, excited cry preceded Reika as she was catapulted through the air into the small lake, landing with a large _splash_. On the shore, John quickly limped to the edge in case he needed to dive in, but Reika’s head broke the lake surface within moments and the two of them laughed. The sound carried across the water to the opposite side where Sam, Daniel and Teyla sat enjoying a cool, fruity Athosian drink reserved for hot days like today.

“He’s going to sleep well tonight,” Daniel remarked with a light tone as four other children, both Athosian and Kadarian, flocked around John and demanded to be catapulted as well. Torren was among them. “I’m exhausted just from looking at them.”

Teyla smiled as she refilled his cup. “John has a kind heart and much endurance.”

Bringing the cup to his lips, Daniel paused and cocked an eyebrow in fake offense. “I _read_ to them.”

“You are very brave,” Teyla agreed, though her smile seemed far more teasing than diplomatic, which prompted Daniel into further indignant retort.

Smirking, Sam tuned out their bantering and turned her attention to John. She watched as he caught hold of the next child and repeated the catapult he’d performed with Reika. His wide, effortless grin at the action, despite having injured his leg on a previous mission, made her stomach twinge slightly.

 _We’re going to need to have that talk soon,_ Sam mused. _We’re not getting any younger._

Although they’d only dated openly for four months, Sam recognised a biological need to talk of something further than a few months ahead. Last December, she’d turned forty. According to Keller, she was still ‘eligible’, in a sense, to contribute to the baby boom that was sure to come in the next few years, but as she grew older, the risks increased exponentially as well.

Thus far, Sam hadn’t dared mention it to John. She didn’t want to drive him away, especially since things were going so well. They’d even discussed moving in together when Sam transferred back from her administrative position on Tirana next month to focus more on scientific research and development.

Seeing him and Reika together, though, only reminded her that she might have lost her one and only chance at being a mother.

“Auntie Sam!”

Sam blinked, realised Reika was waving and calling for her, and she pulled herself together. Getting to her feet, she glanced at Daniel with a raised eyebrow and a smirk. “Coming for a swim too, _Dad_?”

“Eh…” Daniel seemed to retreat further back into the shadows of the surrounding trees and hide behind his cup of Athosian fruit drink.

“Chicken,” Sam teased and walked off into the water before he could retort. She waded out until the bottom began to disappear beneath her feet and then plunged under the surface and swam to the middle of the lake. When she resurfaced, she took a moment to gain her bearings and then swam until she reached Reika, John and the other children.

“Auntie Sam!” Reika called again with glee as she bounced up and down and gesticulated for John to throw her into the water again.

Eyes on the other children teaming up on the shore, Sam didn’t see John’s mischievous wink at Reika before the girl was launched so close to Sam that she was drenched with water.

Spluttering, Sam glared at John. “Careful. You don’t want to pull another muscle and sit on the sideline for another few weeks.”

Hunching down by the shore, John shrugged. “Not so bad if I get to do this instead of paperwork.”

As Reika resurfaced and began to swim around her in circles to show off her chest strokes, Sam rolled her eyes and continued to address John. “You _should_ be resting that leg. Didn’t you complain all yesterday about having to send Lorne’s team with the Genii commandos instead of yours?”

“Whatever happens, I can still pilot,” John said, then added with a teasing tone, “I’m turning into an old man, you know. Gotta start looking at my options.”

“Those are six words I never expected to hear from you,” Sam deadpanned, then threw in a smile and some praise for the Kadarian girl calling for her to ‘ _Look, look, Auntie Sam! Look what I can do_!’

A _splash_ and accompanying waves told her John had joined them in the water, to the general disappointment from the children wanting to be catapulted once more. Sam turned to watch him as he waded out with Torren in his arms, the soon-to-be three-year-old itching to get into the water; his feet splashed impatiently against the surface.

“What can I say,” John said once he reached her and held Torren securely around the middle so the boy could splash around for a moment. “For the past three months, I’ve spent three-quarters of my time on either paperwork or training regimes. Then, the first time I get to go off-world on a mission in a month, I pull a muscle _walking down a hill_...” He grimaced, letting her glimpse the frustration behind his casual tone. “It kinda puts things into perspective.”

Sam’s heart went out to him. It wasn’t easy to admit you weren’t the same anymore, that you had limitations now despite your training. It reminded her that, as of next month, they’d be the same age.

If they’d been back on Earth, by now they’d no longer have ground combat operational status since they were at an increased risk for injuries, and their career would’ve taken a natural turn for more administrative or specialist duties. Sam would’ve probably gone back to the science labs. John would’ve probably turned to pilot training if given the option: anything to be able to keep flying.

This wasn’t Earth, though. Atlantis was just a remnant, a piece that survived the alien attack on Earth seventeen months ago, and it had needed to adapt. A new military framework had been implemented, keeping much of the old but introducing new rules and guidelines as well to account for their new circumstances.

For instance, the retirement age and the limit for active operational status had been raised due to the lack of new recruits and an already high average age. If she chose to and her health allowed it, Sam could partake in ground combat missions until she was 45 and stay a CO until she hit 70.

Also, fraternisation was no longer a court-martial offense, unless it was used in some way to hinder military operations or wilfully break down military cohesion. Those engaged in a relationship were transferred if necessary so that they weren’t in the same chain of command, and you were not allowed to fraternise with someone far below you in rank. In addition, an agreement needed to be signed in which both parties swore to keep things professional while on the job, or face the penalty of a demotion and disciplinary actions, all depending on the severity of the infraction. In essence, it meant you were watched and scrutinised all the time. One step out of line and Caldwell would come down on you hard.

“Well… look at it this way,” Sam told John as Reika turned over on her back to show her still rudimentary backstrokes. “If McKay and Zelenka succeeds with their defensive suit project, you can be a veritable Terminator out there. From the designs they showed me, the suit’s exoskeleton is designed to keep you walking whatever injuries you sustain.”

“Great, so I’ll be Darth Vader.” John snorted and looked down at Torren. “Well, maybe then I’ll be able to win in a bantos fight against you when you’re all grown up, kid.”

The boy barely paid attention to him; his small feet were kicking frantically at the lake surface. Sighing and making it seem the most natural thing in the world, John shifted his grip on Torren so that he could bounce him up and down in the water. The action made the boy giggle loudly and Sam smiled.

 _Yeah… We definitely need to have that talk,_ she thought as John’s features became enigmatic and relaxed once more.

* * *

 **June 12 th, 2010**

Lying disassembled on the firing range table, the gun looked so innocent. Even so, Hailey’s heart was beating fast despite her constant reminder to breathe deeply. She watched it from three metres away, Ronon and Dr MacKenzie standing behind her with gentle encouragement.

It seemed so silly to go through something that’d once been as natural as slipping on a pair of pants, but this was what being shot had done to her. The sounds of the firing range could launch her into panic attacks. The sight of a fully assembled weapon still sent cold shivers down her spine and made her forget to breathe.

“One step at a time, Captain,” Dr MacKenzie reminded her.

“I know,” Hailey snapped, feeling frustrated by the situation, by her own weakness.

Taking another deep breath, she walked slowly to the table and stopped. Every fibre in her being pleaded with her to run away, but she held her ground. She was determined to get through it this time; she was getting sick of being sick.

Prolonged immersion therapy had been Ronon’s suggestion, although the Satedans had had a different word for it. He’d revealed that he’d seen her ‘affliction’, as he called it, before on Sateda, and that this was the therapy that’d seemed to work best for his comrades-in-arms.

Dr MacKenzie had agreed and as such, for the past month, she’d gradually immersed herself in the once-familiar presence of a gun. It’d lain on a table like this, although fully assembled, while she gradually approached it for various stretches of time. She’d tried holding it in her hand and aiming it at targets with various degrees of success. She’d also tried disassembling and assembling it, again with various results. Other people had tried holding it in her presence too, but that was still a too powerful trigger and so they’d instead focused on ‘empowering her’, as MacKenzie said.

Hailey stared at each of the disassembled parts, hesitating. In the corner of her eye, she saw Ronon move as if to intercept, and she knew there was no point giving up this early. She’d worked too bloody hard for that.

With surprising ease despite a thundering heart, Hailey assembled the gun and let it rest in her hand for a moment. All the while, she breathed deeply like MacKenzie had taught her and felt, if only for a moment, the confident clarity she’d once possessed. The next step was harder, though.

“You can do this, Captain,” MacKenzie said, his voice calm and sure. “Just like you practiced.”

A new breath of oxygen filled her nostrils, went all the way down to her stomach and filled her entire body. Focusing on her breathing and fixing her eyes on the target in the distance, Hailey cocked the magazine into its slot and felt the weight rest with past familiarity. Then, she laid the gun down on the table, inserted a pair of earplugs underneath her head earmuffs, picked up the gun again, got into position and touched her finger upon the trigger.

Her eyes closed as she pulled the trigger and the force of the shot vibrated through her entire upper body. Her legs started to shake violently and she forgot to breathe…

But even though her heart was racing, she didn’t succumb to the all-blackout panic she’d experienced before. Instead, hands shaking, Hailey opened her eyes and laid the gun back down on the table. Then, gasping slightly as if suddenly breaking surface after swimming underwater too long, she stepped back and lost all strength in her legs. She began heaving for air, tears welling up into her eyes, and she clawed at the ground for control.

“You did excellently, Captain,” MacKenzie was at her side immediately, his hand put comfortingly on her shoulder. “Just breathe it out. You can do it.”

As the spell passed, Hailey began to laugh, whether from hysteria or pure relief, she didn’t know. However, when she finally sat back and wiped the tears from her eyes, she looked up at Ronon and grinned.

“I did it,” she said. “You owe me dinner.”

Ronon smirked and nodded.

* * *

**July 29 th, 2010**

The smallest sounds woke him up now. That was one of the first lessons Daniel had learned after adopting Reika. Some nights, he was grateful for his experiences with SG-1 and the need to respond quickly to unexpected situations in the middle of the night. In a sense, they’d prepared him for this, even though it was a far cry between a Goa’uld system lord’s attack and a little girl’s sleepy whimpers.

Groggily, Daniel rolled out of bed and rubbed his eyes, walking sluggishly toward the second bedroom. A small night lamp in the corner that was always turned on gave him enough light to see that Reika had curled up on the floor against the opposite wall again, sobbing brokenly.

“Hey, sweetie,” Daniel mumbled as he reached down and picked her up. Still trapped somewhat in her nightmare, she resisted slightly and squirmed in his lap, but eventually recognised him and clung to him instead. As her broken sobs vibrated against his chest, Daniel agonised with her.

It had started a week ago, completely out of the blue. Reika woke up several times a night with terrible nightmares and cried inconsolably for hours. From what he could get out of her, it was about monsters eating and killing her family, and chasing her too. Even without the base therapist confirming his hypothesis, Daniel knew she was reliving the attack on New Kadara.

The knowledge pained him and reminded him that this tiny little girl, who was usually so full of life and laughter, was a survivor of the most heinous act he’d ever heard the Wraith perform. It seemed only natural that she, too, would have to deal with what had happened to her. He was only surprised that it’d taken this long to manifest.

 _I’ll keep you safe from now on,_ Daniel always told her. _You’re safe here. The Wraith can’t hurt you anymore. Your auntie and uncle stopped them, and made them flee far, far away. They will protect you too. Always._

It seemed to help. Despite bouts of crankiness and bad temper on both parts during the day due to lack of proper sleep and those other dark thoughts lurking unresolved in their sub-consciousness, they were two peas in a pod. No matter how angry she could be with him for the little things, Reika still relied on him, as he did her. He, too, was a survivor, and her smiles and laughter would be his salvation.

He was parent first, though. As such, holding Reika tightly in his arms and ignoring the bone-deep weariness in his body, Daniel rubbed her back soothingly and settled in for the long haul.

* * *

**August 20 th, 2010**

The more things changed, the more they stayed the same. As he got older and more experienced, John knew the truth of that too well. While these past few months had been bliss compared to a year before, with people finding back to the joy and happiness in their lives, shit still found a way to hit the fan and expose the underbelly of their new chapter in life.

“Did he have anyone close in the city?” Keller’s voice was soft, her eyes looking up from the blue-white face of Private Johnson, who lay stretched out on the cold steel gurney underneath a white sheet. An angry purple bruise circled his neck just below the jawline.

John’s insides twisted. “Yeah. I’ll talk to them.”

It wasn’t easy. He hated the looks in their faces – disbelief, anger, and grief. He’d hoped they’d be done with that by now. He’d hoped there wouldn’t be anymore pointless deaths, at least not of this kind, not when things were better than they’d ever been and there were so few of them left…

By the time he reached their quarters that night, John felt drained. He hardly noticed Sam before she spoke up.

“I heard the news.” She rose from the couch, the table in front of her set with dinner from Little Chow. Her voice was solemn, yet sympathetic.

They were the last words uttered for a long while. Sam found a bottle of Master Togar’s strongest brew and they spent an hour drinking in silence, sitting out on their small balcony in the cool night. Nothing really needed saying. They’d already said it countless times before.

Peace was the hardest time. No actions to keep you busy or to keep you from your thoughts and nightmares; to keep you sane. After all his years in the service, John knew that. It didn’t make it easier, however. It made it that much harder.

You had to find other ways to cope – whatever worked for you. For some, it was continued off-world missions and hanging out with friends. For others, it was drugs, alcohol or even sex. For a few, like Johnson, it was opting out.

Eventually, the cold drew them inside. They ate the food Sam had brought – cold now – and washed it down with water to stave off the fuzziness from the Tikwee brew. Then, after Sam had cleared away the dishes in the small kitchenette, he took her hand and pulled her close.

“We’ll be okay, right?” His words were muttered low in her ear as if someone might overhear, as if their very existence was too terrible to acknowledge.

Sam snuggled into the crook of his neck, her voice equally low. “Yeah, we will.”

John inhaled her scent, sighing deeply. “I should’ve suspected something. I’ve—“

“Shh… You couldn’t have known.” Pulling back, Sam caressed John’s cheek softly. Her eyes shone brightly with unshed tears in the dim light of their quarters. “Johnson passed all his psych and fitness tests. His friends hadn’t noticed anything different about him. There were no warning signs.” She paused and ran her hand through his hair. “Don’t add that weight to your shoulders, John.”

“If no one knew,” John said slowly, ignoring her last counsel, “then he dealt with his demons alone. That just makes it worse.” He looked down at her, his lips thinning in renewed frustration. “No one should bear that darkness on their own.”

“Except sometimes they do,” said Sam in resignation. “We can do our very best to help shoulder that darkness, John, and sometimes that helps…but we’re only human. We can’t help everyone. We’ll wind up carrying our own darkness too in the end.”

John knew this was a side of her that wouldn’t have been present unless she’d been in the same position as him: dealing with people under her command who struggled, and with her own feelings of inadequacy. She’d gone through several rounds with the base therapist in order to overcome that, and was still working on it. Even so, he found it difficult to admit she was right. Maybe he wasn’t ready to hear it.

Whatever it was, John wound up pushing Sam forcibly away and narrowing his eyes in accusation. “We should _try_ , or would you say the same thing to Hailey? ‘ _I’m sorry, but we can’t help everyone. You’re on your own_ ’?”

Hurt flashed in Sam’s face and her eyes trembled with tears. “Don’t, John.”

_Don’t start this. Don’t push us into a fight over this again._

But John didn’t care. There was a tightly wound ball of frustration in his nervous system that wanted relief and Sam was the only person present.

* * *

  ***** TO BE CONTINUED IN PART 2 *****

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait! Epilogue turned out to be a challenge to write as I had at least five different paths I wanted to take... This is the final version and hopefully one you'll enjoy as much as I do. Part two will be uploaded very soon.


	29. Epilogue, Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Peace is a journey of a thousand miles and it must be taken one step at a time." – Lyndon B. Johnson

** **

* * *

 

 **EPILOGUE, PART 2**  | "…that is forever [Earth]"

Prompt: a time for peace  
Music: "S.T.A.Y." ( _Interstellar_ , Hans Zimmer)

* * *

" _Peace is a journey of a thousand miles and it must be taken one step at a time."_

–  **Lyndon B. Johnson**

* * *

 **August 22** **nd** **, 2010**

John stared as the digital clock on the nightstand changed digits. 04:34. Then he shifted his eyes to the spot next to him. Still empty.

He exhaled deeply and flipped onto his back, the covers thrown away hours ago because they were too hot and clammy. No sleep tonight. Just his demons whispering at the back of his mind that he'd seriously screwed up this time, that he should've just kept his mouth shut and taken out his frustration on Ronon in the gym like he usually did. Sam hadn't deserved it.

John looked sideways. The digits had changed again. 04:36, and he was still here.

_This can't go on._

Rolling out of bed, John stopped only to put on pants, T-shirt and running shoes before exiting his quarters. He started walking, passing Jackson's door down the corridor, but ignoring it. Sam wouldn't have sought refuge there, not with Jackson dealing with Reika's recurring nightmares these days. She wouldn't have done anything to add to that burden, which was just another punch in John's gut. They were supposed to be a team now, to have each other's backs no matter what, and John hadn't.

The hallways of Atlantis were dimmed for the night, but lights sprung on for him. The city sensed his ATA gene and accommodated him. It opened doors, turned on lights, and sent him off in the transporter almost before he'd input a destination.

John walked, his feet taking him down by-now-familiar routes. Down corridors, up and down staircases, through large rooms and abandoned common areas. Each movement processed the confusion of thoughts and emotions within him, making his path clearer. By the time he finally caught sight of his target destination he was ready.

"Airmen," John greeted the two armed guards stationed outside the door, who straightened in response and stepped aside for him.

Pulling out his key card, John swiped it through the device superimposed on the door controls and input his 12-digit code along with his hand print. When the lights showed green, the door opened and he stepped inside.

Despite being brightly lit up, there was a sense of confinement about this room. Along every available wall, there were stacks of big and small containers lined up from floor to ceiling, all carrying the logos of either the SGC, Homeworld Command or  _Daedalus_. Sam had moved it all here after Xiaoyi discovered Janus' lab, giving it the best protection she could under the circumstances. Although people were aware now that a room like this existed, Woolsey had promised there'd be no further attempts at forcibly revealing its secrets, at least from the IOA's side. John appreciated that about him.

"Sam?" His voice carried almost unnaturally through the connected rooms, meeting only silence. Uneasy, John ventured deeper into the room.

He found her seated in front of a desk, shoulders slumped, a square steel device sitting inertly in front of her. An old familiar ache went through him at the sight, almost diverting him from his purpose for coming here.

"Sam?" He tried again, his voice low, gentle, and hesitant.

Exhaling deeply, Sam sniffled and straightened somewhat in her seat. "Still nothing."

"I'm sorry." Approaching her slowly, John put his hand on her shoulder. She didn't shrug it off, which made him take it a step further and squeeze her shoulder softly. As he did, he could feel the tension in her and he sighed deeply. "I'm sorry for a lot of things."

"I know," Sam said softly. With both hands, she rubbed her eyes before beginning to pack away the prototype long-range communication device that Homeworld Command had sent in the Evacuation.

John let go of her shoulder and stepped back to watch her, all the while aching with shame and regret. "Will you come home tonight?"

He knew he didn't deserve it, that he didn't deserve  _her_ , but he couldn't bear this distance he'd put between them. If the past two years had shown him anything, then it was that she was part of him whether he wanted to or not. He hoped she still felt the same, that she could forgive him for being a jerk.

"Yeah." Closing the lid on the small container in front of her, Sam paused and exhaled again. "But I'm tired of fighting old arguments, John. It seems that no matter how far we've come, we always come back to the same thing and I can't continue to apologise for what happened to us last year."

John winced, shifting uncomfortably on his feet. "I know, Sam. I'm sorry. It—it just slipped." It was a poor excuse and they both knew it, but it was also the truth. His voice lowered in misery. "You have  _no_ idea how much I've wanted to take it back ever since."

Sam finally turned to meet his eyes. Hers were red and puffy, and he wondered of much of that was due to him and how much was due to the device she'd just put away.

"I'm sorry," repeated John quietly, hesitant once more.

He didn't know what else to say. They'd been down this road before and perhaps they would again. Old hurts and pains had a tendency to linger despite promises to put them behind, as this whole thing had proved. His only hope was that they would eventually shrink to a manageable size, and that no matter what happened, they wouldn't let the distance get too wide again.

The ball was in Sam's court, though. John could only stare at her, hoping she'd see the multitude of emotions in his eyes; that she'd see how desperately he wanted to fix this; that he wanted to continue making that one step at a time with her. No one else could measure up.

After a long tense moment, Sam inhaled deeply, pushed back her chair and got to her feet. Then she crossed the few yards separating them and snuggled into his chest.

John enveloped her in his arms immediately, letting out a breath of relief he hadn't been aware of holding. Nestling her head under his chin, squeezing her tight, he muttered, "I love you."

"I know," whispered Sam against his chest, and her fingers dug deeply into his back, pulling him closer until there wasn't any air left between them.

* * *

 **September 28** **th** **, 2010**

Despite the fact that he'd been beamed up to  _Daedalus_  hundreds of times before, Caldwell knew this time was different. For the first time in one and a half years, he wasn't beaming up from Atlantis for a patrol or a rapid response mission within the borders of Pegasus. Instead, that task had gone to the  _Vestige_ and the Travelers for an indefinite period of time while  _Daedalus,_ by widespread demand and citywide vote _,_  finally went to find answers.

Caldwell wasn't normally a man to be overwhelmed, but now he sought the solitude of the balcony outside the gate room. Inside, the gate room was packed with people and a formal send-off. He was expected to say a few words. He had no idea what to say, though. Any smart comments or famous quotations escaped him; only the grimness of what faced him ahead rested on his mind. So he let the swift ocean wind wash over him instead, committing the feeling to memory. This could be the last time he felt it.

A sea bird cawed overhead. Caldwell looked up to see it streak above the tip of tower T1 on the South Pier. Moments later, a puddle jumper followed it. The hum of its engines sounded for only a moment and then disappeared with the Jumper as it set out towards the large, ragtag-looking Traveler ship landing on the South Pier.

The  _Maxxon_  was there to drop off and pick up the weekly batch of resources: foodstuff and large bulks of raw trinium and naquadah that couldn't fit through the stargate in exchange for processed materials from Atlantis's factories and pharmaceuticals from the medical laboratories. Then the ship would head off towards the Genii home world and some other Coalition planets before making its way back to the Traveler home world and the circle would repeat.

'The Chain of Life', some called it. All Caldwell knew was that they couldn't build an advanced society without it. No one aboard Atlantis were farmers, and even though a small group of people were willing to learn from other Pegasus communities, learning took time. That made Atlantis dependent upon others to produce the majority of their food. However, so long as they could provide factories and laboratories, they wouldn't starve. Instead, they'd flourish.

That was the selling point, anyway. Keeping that system alive was more difficult, fraught especially with political and diplomatic issues. As per the Alliance treaty, small groups of both Travelers and Genii had been accepted to Atlantis to either contribute to research, the factories and the laboratories, or to train alongside Atlantis' own soldiers. However, with that many different personalities and cultures living and working together in a society already bruised by internal schemes and different ideologies, it was a disaster waiting to happen.

In any case, that was Caldwell's belief. He would've advocated more caution and time before allowing their allies to send people to Atlantis, but Woolsey had argued that they needed to show trust and that they needed workers. If he hadn't known Woolsey was managing and balancing the whole thing with everything in his arsenal and at least four different contingency plans, Caldwell would've pressed the issue. As it were, he'd decided to show a little trust of his own. He only hoped that Atlantis would still be standing if  _Daedalus_ managed to return.

Out on the pier, the bay doors of the  _Maxxon_  opened and a flurry of activity commenced as more Jumpers arrived to start shipping crates and chunks of trinium and naquadah to the factories on the West Pier.

At the same time, the door leading inside to the gate room  _whooshed_ open. Caldwell turned to glance at Carter, who came up to stand next to him. She was wearing her dress blues, her apparent calm broken by a hint of restlessness when she crossed her arms.

"So this is it, huh," she said carefully, her eyes fixed upon the  _Maxxon_. "You're going back."

Following her gaze, Caldwell sighed. "So it seems."

"We might have to put up your names on the Memorial Wall," stated Carter.

"You might."

There was no sugar-coating that possibility. Going back was risky. Both Caldwell and Carter had emphasised that to the senior council and the masses before the vote was carried out. Essentially,  _Daedalus_ was flying in blind, having nothing but out-dated intel to go on. All soldiers knew the dangers of that. Still, this was a democracy and the majority had decided.

Caldwell sighed again. "Let's hope it'll be worth it."

"Do you think…?" Carter hesitated, her voice quiet now. Her slender hands fisted slightly against the fabric of her uniform, the only outward sign that her composure was nothing more than a façade; that she, like everyone else, was full of questions.

"I don't know," muttered Caldwell, his voice barely loud enough to carry on the wind. He was staring fixatedly on the  _Maxxon_  when his hands suddenly fisted around the railing in old, unresolved frustration. "That's been our problem all along. We  _don't_  know. Don't know who those damn aliens are, where they came from, what motive they had—don't even know what's left standing or not!" He gritted his teeth, unable to continue.

It took a moment for Carter to break the tense silence, her hesitance still present. "By the time you get back, we'll know more."

" _If_ we get back," Caldwell said sharply, knowing that even based on out-dated information, the aliens made the Ori and the Wraith superhive look like child's play. Pushing back from the railing, he straightened and crossed his arms across his chest in an attempt at restraint, then met Carter's eyes. "They could still be there."

"Or not." Carter's tone was calm, but her eyes were glittering with unshed tears. "Like you said, we don't know. But even if they are, you might be able to get away. The  _Sun Tzu_ did it and they didn't even have a ZPM equipped." She paused, a distinct waver entering her voice. "Who knows? There could even be survivors. If not on Earth, then off-world."

It sounded like grasping at straws, but a part of him knew that she could be right. When they knew as little as they did, anything was possible. However, giving in to that poisonous idea was dangerous. It only set you up for more heartache and grief if things were, in fact, like they'd always suspected.

Caldwell preferred to be realistic and to expect the worst. After all, the last they'd heard reported from Earth was that the alien ships were wreaking destruction worldwide without discrimination and on a scale that far exceeded any standard 'shock and awe' tactic.

But Carter knew all that. All she asked for was a glimmer of hope, something to keep her going. Even commanders needed that. Otherwise, how would they cope with the weight of the world that'd been lost, but which still clung on to them every waking second, reminding them constantly of all that was gone? That they were on their own now? There had been times since the Evacuation where even  _he_  had struggled, hoping beyond hope that there was light at the end of the tunnel and that he'd finally reach it one day.

So in the end, he conceded.

"Maybe," Caldwell said lowly, his frustration bleeding away as the numb grimness of what was facing him returned to weigh on his mind. "We'll see when we get there."

For a moment, none of them said anything. Then Caldwell glanced at Carter, taking in the unshed tears that contrasted her tense posture and the silver birds on the epaulets of her dress blues. There was a matching pair on his uniform, older and more worn out, but still a testament to the responsibilities the two of them had carried alone until Sheppard received his promotion.

That thought sobered him. "If  _Daedalus_ doesn't come back, you and Sheppard will be on your own."

"I know," Carter said quietly. She straightened slightly, wiped the corners of her eyes, and gave him a level stare. "We'll keep the ship afloat. Whatever it takes."

Caldwell grimaced, hearing O'Neill's recorded voice echoing through his mind from a flash drive that'd been sent to Atlantis in the Evacuation: ' _This is the last order you two will ever get from us: Keep our people alive,_ _ **whatever**_ _it takes.'_

"Don't overdo it," Caldwell said lowly. "And don't do anything stupid."

Smirking slightly at that, Carter raised an eyebrow. "Like secretly making alliances with other Pegasus societies that easily outnumber us, building a big honking space gun, or carrying out a military coup d'état against the IOA? Already done that."

Caldwell was tempted to roll his eyes. "Those were necessary. Things are better now."

 _At least relatively speaking,_ he thought, his mind going back to the political headaches Woolsey was going to be facing with the Genii and the Travelers now working in the city.

"Right." Carter looked away, still smirking. Then, after a moment, her expression grew solemn once more. "What if I suddenly get in touch with the  _Odyssey_?"

"Then you weigh your options," Caldwell said carefully, skirting his eyes over his shoulder to make sure there weren't any eavesdroppers. "Technically, our mission still stands, but without  _Daedalus_  or most of the materials we brought you, which you've instead spent on the Ascalon, you'll have to find another way."

"Maybe they've already found their way home," Carter said, her voice quiet and sober, but with that poisonous touch of hope present in the subtext.

"Maybe," Caldwell acknowledged, even though he doubted it. The ship had been MIA for nearly two years; that was practically a lifetime. Nothing Homeworld Command or they had done since had gotten them anywhere closer to finding them. He wasn't keen on crushing Carter's hope, however. There were still things they didn't know.

"We'll keep our eyes and ears open when we get there." His jaw clenched slightly, his insides churning as he once more became reminded of the path ahead. "Meanwhile…" He paused, indicating the epaulets on Carter's dress blues. "I wouldn't get too attached to those birds. If I don't get back, you'll be offered a pair of silver stars instead. I've already given Woolsey my recommendation."

Blinking, Carter's eyes widened. "But—"

"The military wasn't designed for a triumvirate or dual leadership in the long run and the senior council agrees." Letting his arms fall calmly to the side, Caldwell straightened unconsciously. "As the senior officer, I'd be the natural choice for a General. You're next in line."

Returning her stare to the  _Maxxon_ out on the pier, Carter sighed. " _Shit._ "

"Excuse me?" Caldwell raised an eyebrow.

"Sorry, sir." The honorific slipped past Carter's lips automatically. She hesitated, unclenching her fists and resting her hands on her lower back instead. "It's just…I'm not sure I can be both a General and a…" She cleared her throat uncomfortably. "Colonel Sheppard and I, are discussing whether to, um…"

Catching on immediately, Caldwell froze. "Oh."

"Yeah," Carter said awkwardly.

Thankfully, she didn't elaborate further. Caldwell appreciated that. Although he'd come somewhat to terms with Carter and Sheppard's personal relationship since they managed to keep it professional whenever they were in his vicinity, an ingrained part of him was still against it.

He'd been in the military for thirty years. During that time, he'd been both married and divorced, albeit to a civilian, and he'd even suffered a reprimand once for going to dinner with a subordinate officer. Watching two senior officers' relationship unfold openly went against every grain in his discipline and sense of duty. To see the same two officers attempt to establish a family as well…

 _I'm an old guy,_ Caldwell realised heavily.  _I might never come to accept it fully, no matter how professional they are._ He sighed internally.  _Sheppard as a General, though…_

"Don't worry," Carter said quietly, bringing him out of his heavy thoughts. "I'll work it out somehow." Despite the shine still present in her eyes, she smiled at him, her spine straight, any hint of doubt gone. She was once more the seasoned commander he'd come to respect. "You just do what you've gotta do, and if you're able to…bring your crew back home. We'll keep a light on for you."

"Sounds good." Meeting Carter's eyes, Caldwell nodded and smiled.

 _They'll be all right,_ a voice at the back of his head told him. _She, Woolsey and Sheppard will make sure our people are safe. They won't be left behind._

Exhaling gently, Caldwell gave the wonderful view of Atlantis glittering in the sun one last stare, before inhaling the fresh ocean wind for what could possibly be the last time.

"I'm ready," he said.

* * *

 **October 4** **th** **, 2010**

The almost imperceptible hum from the stasis pods was familiar by now. As she stood in front of them, eyes closed, Shen could see the people encased within the pods as clearly as if her eyes were open. She knew exactly how far she had to reach to touch that warm, glassy surface and let it trail beneath her fingertips.

There was a sense of comfort about this room and these pods that kept bringing her back here day after day. Although there was no scientific or medical evidence for it, Shen thought perhaps that it was because the  _Sun Tzu_ crewmembers in stasis could sense her presence and found it as comforting as she did theirs.

A smile began to touch her lips…then she heard footsteps halt just inside the doorway.

Sighing in annoyance, Shen opened her eyes and saw, as she expected, Woolsey's reflection in the pod's glass cover. "It reflects poorly on a leader that he must continually seek out his former opponent for advice."

"Nice to see you too, Shen," Woolsey replied, unfazed by her sharp tone; he even had the audacity to smile fleetingly. He walked up to stand beside her, another thing that annoyed her. That space was reserved for someone else; he was too close, presuming too much familiarity.

"I have no advice to give you today," Shen said, jaw clenched slightly as she turned away from the stasis pod, intending to leave the room immediately.

"Someone tried to sabotage the R&D laboratory."

That made her halt in her tracks. Looking over her shoulder, Shen narrowed her eyes at Woolsey's back. "And you immediately suspect my former associates. Or is it perhaps myself?"

"No, not you." Studying the stasis pods as if trying to see the allure that brought her here, Woolsey's tone was neutral. "As it happens, we've already apprehended the perpetrator. He was caught red-handed by Colonel Carter and two of the lab's Traveler scientists. He confessed immediately."

Shen frowned. "Then I do not see why you might need my assistance."

With a deliberate turn, Woolsey met her eyes. "He claims to be part of a group called the New Yihequan." Shen's eyes widened and Woolsey's narrowed. "Have you heard of them?"

"Not that particular group," Shen said after a moment, her tone alert. " _Yihequan_ was an anti-imperialist movement at the end of the 19th century that incited a rebellion in China and caused a war with the so-called Great Powers." She paused, lips thinning as she realised the significance of the name. "It is also called the Boxer Rebellion. Many were killed, especially civilians."

Woolsey eyed her for a moment, as if gauging whether her words were true or not; Shen was used to it by now. Eventually, he said, "What was their aim?"

"To oppose foreign influence," Shen said matter-of-factly and with the most neutral tone she could manage.

As expected, Woolsey caught on quickly. "So this new group intends to follow in their footsteps, except exchanging the Great Powers for the Travelers and the Genii. They see them as a threat, someone to be driven out, meaning they probably won't stop at this sole attempt." A worried line appeared on his forehead, the only outward sign of his thoughts straying elsewhere.

Something resonated inside her when Shen saw that line, and not in the way she'd expected. Unsettled by the feeling and doing everything not to analyse it, she looked away.

"Some will believe you're their ring leader," Woolsey said after several quiet minutes, his voice almost hushed.

Shen sneered. "I expected as much. A Chinese name for a group must mean a Chinese leader, right?" She scoffed. "American logic."

"Yes, only  _Americans_ would think that way, right?" Woolsey's voice dripped with sarcasm. When she looked at him sharply, he raised an eyebrow in challenge and the words died in Shen's throat.

 _I'm no better. I am quick to label too._ She sighed inwardly.  _Will we ever be able to stop, even now when there are so few of us left?_

"I am sorry," said Shen quietly, her jaw tense. "I spoke in haste."

Stepping away from the stasis pods and into the spot next to her again, Woolsey's features softened slightly. "Which makes you just as human as the rest of us. I'm glad to see it."

Uneasy, Shen withdrew her eyes again, but didn't make another attempt at moving away. "So, what advice did you seek from me today? Keep in mind, I do not know who are part of this group, or what they plan to do."

Woolsey sighed. "I know. Given their political inclinations, however, chances are pretty high that you might guess who  _could_  be part of this group. That is not primarily what I seek from you, though."

He paused and Shen turned to meet his gaze again. In that moment, he looked tired. Once, she might've relished that. Now, however… She understood all too well. Leadership was a constant struggle, not only with others, but with your psyche as well. If you let it, it would devour you whole and leave nothing behind but an empty shell.

_And I wasn't strong enough._

"People who feel the need for sabotage in order to have their voices heard, feel like no one is listening or is interested in listening," Woolsey said, his tone both weary and serious. "They have most likely felt suppressed, discriminated or shunned by the powers that be or others around them. Based on the leading opinions of the senior council, I think I can understand why they might feel that way. We have welcomed the Genii and the Travelers with seemingly open arms because we needed to. In the process, a part of our population has been ignored."

Shen narrowed her eyes, reaching Woolsey's conclusion before it was uttered. "I am no longer a politician."

"No, and I would not ask you to become one either," Woolsey said. "Not today, at least, but perhaps in the future, when things have settled down and bygones begin to fade." He paused for a moment. "However, you are part of this community and you also have a voice. Talk to them."

"I might join them," Shen said lowly, testing him. "I am not convinced having the Genii and the Travelers here is such a good idea either."

Woolsey smiled slightly, which annoyed her to no end; it was as if he knew something she didn't. "You're not alone in that belief, Shen. It is an issue I'll admit is occasionally difficultto navigate, even without the New Yihequan's efforts to worsen it. However, you also know how to appreciate what benefits us. Sabotage of our own labs and resources does not do that." He paused, clearly preparing to leave, his tone changing to reflect that. "Urge them to choose a different route, a democratic one, and I'll find a way to bring you back into the council. Might not be anytime soon, but I can get you there in the end."

"Why would you do that?" Shen narrowed her eyes.

"Because every democracy needs oppositions," Woolsey said simply as he began to turn towards the door. "Unchallenged, one side might gain peace and stability for a time, and things will flourish, but with peace comes the risk of docility and that leaves room for more sinister things for those who know how to exploit it. Even the best of us with the best intentions might fall into that trap."

At that, Woolsey sent her a hard, knowing look. Shen flushed slightly. "However," he continued. "With transparency and contrasts, we'll always be on our toes. We'll always strive to achieve the best possible decisions for our society. It might be extremely challenging and frustrating at times, but it is the price we need to pay for our freedoms." He gave her a smirk. "Besides, every ruler needs its jester to say the things he or she doesn't want to hear."

Shen hadn't expected such an honest answer. She hadn't expected the ghost of a smile that crossed her lips either, or the overwhelming sense of gratitude crashing against her mental walls.

Clearing her throat uneasily, she straightened and turned fully to address Woolsey. "I cannot promise they will listen."

Woolsey smiled, a hint of weariness in his eyes again. "At least you'd have tried. Thank you."

Shen raised an eyebrow. "You are strange, Mr Woolsey. Not many would approach a  _persona non grata_  and ask their assistance, especially considering my past actions. How do you know you can trust me?"

"I don't," Woolsey said simply as he walked towards the exit. "But I'm willing to take that chance. After all, we were friends once, Shen." He stopped, staring back at her with an intense look. "I haven't forgotten that."

Her response died in her throat. Watching him leave, Shen felt tears begin to well up unexpectedly in her eyes. Stunned, she quickly blinked them away, forcing her protective mental walls back into place.

But the walls couldn't push back the warm sensation swelling up in her chest until her body felt as warm as the glass surface of the stasis pods. It was like she, too, was enveloped in one of them: protected and appreciated, but most of all  _seen_.

She wasn't alone. That feeling brought tears to her eyes again and she stared, smiling, at the empty doorway as if Woolsey were still there.

_Thank you… Richard._

* * *

"I'm fine, John. Stop fussing."

Brushing off John's insistent hand, Sam reached out to wipe a clean space on the side of the mirror, which had been fogged with steam from her recent shower. Next to her, in the middle of brushing his teeth for the night, John winced.

"Tha'sh gonna leave a shcar," he said, mouth full of toothpaste and toothbrush, when Sam leaned forward to peel back the wet bandage on her forehead. His hand flew up instinctively to help and curled in restraint when she sent him a glare to back off. Grimacing, John resumed his brushing with a touch of added fervour.

Sam rolled her eyes in exasperation at John's 'Mother Hen routine' and peered more closely into the mirror. If she squinted, she could see the old scar she'd gotten in the Genii civil war crossing underneath today's stitched cut, which was red and swollen.

The sight made her sigh. "Just another day at the office…"

In the corner of her eyes, she saw John twitch and brush harder. Sighing again, she decided to acknowledge his worry.

"Though, I'll admit, I'd hoped I'd met my quota for battle scars."

Eyebrows creased at that, John's eyes skirted to the rest of her body, finding all those other scars that he'd mapped out more times than she could count. With a particularly dark grimace, he reached out to trace one ugly and twisted scar on the left side of her abdomen, which had a matching one on her back. The ghostly touch sent a shiver down Sam's spine.

"Ori staff weapon," he stated, and Sam nodded. She'd told him the story once. He knew how close she'd been to dying at the time; how she'd made her final instructions to Cam. The fact still upset him at times, just as some of his stories upset her.

…And she guessed  _that_  was the core of his fussing.

Smiling slightly, Sam reached down to cover his hand with both of hers. "Look, I'm fine, John. It's just a minor cut. Nothing serious. You should see the other guy."

John frowned at the attempted joke, gazed at her until her smile began to feel awkward, then leaned away so he could spit out the remaining toothpaste in his mouth. Once he straightened, the most visible irritation had left him, replaced by a solemn stare.

"What if it wasn't just you?" he asked and slid his hand along her abdomen until it encircled her belly button. Sam tensed, another cold shiver running down her spine. John sighed. "If we're gonna be serious about having a family, Sam…"

Speechless, Sam blinked. So far, they'd just discussed the possibility of starting a family before they got too old, with John wanting more time to think about it. If he'd progressed to this point, however… The solemn atmosphere infected her too.

"I know," mumbled Sam, deciding to leave her immediate question of whether or not he was ready for later. She didn't want to disrupt this moment when John so clearly needed to air his thoughts. "I didn't think about that. The whole thing happened so fast and I just… It was instinct."

One moment, she'd heard the two Travelers she was working with, Mila and Leila, shout out and had run to find the two young women struggling to keep New Yihequan's saboteur still. The next, she'd wrestled the man away from them and taken him down. It was only when blood began to run into her eye that she'd noticed her own injury.

"It'll be different if it's not just me," Sam said with an attempted smile, squeezing his hand firmly and beginning to feel oddly warm and tingly all over as her initial surprise melted away. "I hear a mother's instinct is really powerful."

"I'll still worry. Probably worse." John sighed again and pulled her into a tight hug. "Man, I thought getting you off Tirana and away from all that black ops stuff would stop things like this from happening. Guess even the R&D lab is dangerous business." He waited a beat. "I'm getting you one of those inflatable sumo suits."

Sam laughed and dropped a kiss on John's unshaven cheek before leaning back to look into his eyes. "Before you get ahead of yourself, John, we're not  _actually_  trying to get pregnant yet."

John smirked and wiggled his eyebrows. "That could be remedied."

Blushing furiously at his answer, Sam thought of some witty comeback—then gave out a yelp when John suddenly hoisted her up and carried her out of the bathroom, her arms and legs flailing in automatic protest.

As he unceremoniously dropped her onto their bed, Sam's eyes were wide and her mind felt pleasantly clouded, though it could be the painkillers kicking in. " _Now_?"

Eyes twinkling in a mix of mischief and apprehension, John ran his hands lightly up her legs, thumbs brushing the more sensitive inside. "As you said, we're not getting any younger."

"Oh." Sam grinned stupidly and reached out to pull him even closer, forgetting completely that she hadn't redressed her wound yet. "Okay."

* * *

 **November 15** **th** **, 2010**

Happiness was very much an attainable goal. Hailey realised that as she sat on the log bench by the graveyard on the mainland, watching Carter run after Reika.

The girl was refusing to wear mittens and a woollen hat, and had turned the chase into a game, running around the graveyard in a large circle with loud squeals of delight every time she escaped capture. Even though Carter was groaning with exasperation and yelling in annoyance at the girl, Hailey thought she spotted a reluctant smile once when Reika laughed until she almost couldn't breathe.

 _It's a strange place to realise this_ , Hailey thought as she noticed the rows of grave markers that Reika skipped around on light feet. She knew many of those names. She'd carried them with her for a long time.  _Maybe I've finally gone crazy. That's what Reese would say, at least._

Recalling the other captain, Hailey felt the familiar hollowness in her chest, and the ball of guilt and grief that lay underneath it for having survived where Reese had not. The tears came easily now, but she'd stopped trying to well them up. Not giving herself release would only feed the emptiness, Dr MacKenzie had told her. She knew what lay behind that door and she wasn't going back. Not with all the progress she'd made.

Her eyes drifted to the smooth black stone erected next to the graveyard. If she went closer, she'd find the names of those who didn't have bodies to bury written in tiny capital letters. They made up four lines on one side of the rock, leaving plenty of room underneath it and on the other sides. Hailey chose not to dwell on that too much. It was just how it was. This was their home now. No matter how peaceful, the future would bring more names.

"You lose a lot of body heat from your head, skipper," Carter cried out matter-of-factly, though with a clear tone of exasperation. Blinking, Hailey turned to look at her. The colonel had stopped on one side of the graveyard, hands on her hips in an intimidating pose. "In this cold, you'll get sick and then you'll have to stay in bed for days. Do you want that?"

"Yes!" Reika yelled back with glee, popping her head out from behind one of the grave markers at the opposite end of the row.

"Fine," Carter said, turning on the spot and marching back to the log bench where Hailey sat. She sat down with a grumble, clutching the woollen hat and mittens in her hands.

"Kids, huh?" Hailey said, smirking. "I was the same at her age."

Cocking an eyebrow at her, Carter gestured to Hailey's slightly red-tipped fingers poking out from her thick jacket sleeves. "You still are, Jenn."

Hailey chuckled. "Someone's gotta keep you on your toes, 'Auntie'."

Carter rolled her eyes and then glanced around to see what Reika was up to. The girl had left the graveyard behind and was currently running in the open field behind it, jumping and skipping amongst the frosty, yellowed grass. If Hailey heard correctly, she was singing to herself and it sounded like a Cash song. That made her laugh.

"What?" Carter raised an eyebrow.

"It's nothing," Hailey said, smirking. "Just figured out who's responsible for the lullabies."

Confused for a moment, Carter glanced back at Reika and seemed to realise what Hailey meant. She chuckled. "John lent her his mp3 player. Daniel's not entirely happy about it given some of Cash's heavier lyrics, but it helps her sleep. That's the important bit."

"Yeah." Hailey's smile slackened slightly. Carter noticed, as always, and spared her a second glance. Sensing the incoming question, Hailey cut her off. "I'm sleeping. At least six hours a night. Eight hours with those new Genii pills we got two months back. Not that I use them much anymore."

"Good." Carter looked back at Reika. They lapsed into silence for a few comfortable minutes, then the older woman suddenly said, "Hope you don't mind that Ronon's coming to dinner tomorrow too."

"I told you not to meddle," Hailey said, grumbling slightly.

"It's not meddling. John wanted to bring a friend. Ronon's it."

"Nice try." Hailey rolled her eyes and brought her fingertips up to her lips to blow hot air on them. Pouting for a minute, she said sullenly, "We're not like that. He's just helped me out. One brother-in-arms to another."

"Sure," Carter hummed, eyes still on the Kadarian girl. The hint of a smirk seemed to cross her lips, but it was gone in the blink of an eye. Not before Hailey had seen it, though.

"We're  _just_  friends," Hailey said, annoyed. At that, Carter glanced at her with a full-blown grin and Hailey groaned in exasperation. "Seriously. Stop it."

She realised as Carter's grin widened that her voice lacked the proper amount of conviction and Hailey stood up abruptly, sticking her fingers deep into her jacket pockets. "I'm going back to the Jumper."

Walking away at a brisk pace, her heart pounding, she began to trail back towards the Jumper landing site on the other side of the small forest to the north. In the background, she heard Carter calling out for Reika and the girl responding in affirmation, and knew they'd catch up to her within minutes.

Hailey picked up the pace. Soon, the trees surrounded her and the scene from before began to replay in her mind, over and over until she groaned once more and shook her head forcefully.

"Ridiculous," she muttered to herself, staring at her feet striding forth, one in front of the other on the icy ground.  _I shouldn't let it bother me. She's just teasing me like she's always doing. That's what families do. Besides, Ronon's just a friend._

Shaking her head again, Hailey lifted her eyes to fixate on the Jumper beyond the trees. From behind, she heard the quick crunching of small feet running on frosty grass and it helped put her mind on other things.

She turned back as Reika caught up and grabbed Hailey's hand like the most natural thing in the world, the girl flushed and slightly out-of-breath but grinning.

"Geez, you're freezing cold," Hailey said as she enveloped and rubbed Reika's small hand in hers. "Should've worn your mittens, kid."

"They're so stupid," Reika said, pouting. She swung her hand back and forth, turning Hailey's arm into a pendulum. "I can't do anything in them."

"Well, sometimes you gotta do things that are stupid." Shrugging, Hailey pulled out the remote to the Jumper with her spare hand and opened the back hatch. "You know, if they get really, really cold, your fingers could fall off. So wear mittens."

A look of horror crossed Reika's face and she jerked her hand back, staring at her red-tipped fingers.

It made Hailey chuckle and reach out to ruffle the girl's pale blonde locks. "You'll be fine, kid. Come on, find your seat."

"Good advice," Carter said moments later as she settled down in the passenger seat, having secured Reika in the back with a seat belt. In the process of initiating the engines, Hailey looked up at her and saw Carter smile. "Maybe you should consider doing something stupid too, Jenn. You're allowed that."

Hailey rolled her eyes and brought the Jumper into the air. "Maybe."

It was the closest she'd get to an answer right now. She just wasn't ready to consider a romantic relationship in her life; she still had her own issues to deal with. She was sure Ronon understood that. Besides, there was always next year…

Unless, of course, the sudden citywide alert from Atlantis on the HUD's interface meant a shitstorm was coming their way.

* * *

 **November 18** **th** **, 2010**

"They're here."

Chuck's voice was hushed as he looked up at everyone gathered in the operations centre. John's eyes drifted to the wall-mounted screen where the blue dot with  _Daedalus'_ IFF signal had come to a halt next to the circle signifying Atlantis.

Any minute, Caldwell would be beaming down for the preliminary debriefing. There would be no smiles greeting him in this room, however. No celebratory cake. The news had already preceded him: there was no hope left in the Milky Way.

John glanced over at Sam; taking in her tense shoulders, pale skin, and almost restless shifting on her feet. Ever since  _Daedalus_ radioed in three days ago, she'd tossed and turned all night, had had trouble concentrating and barely eaten. On top of that, she'd become obsessed with the  _Odyssey_ again, visiting the classified storage room up to six times a day. It worried him.

The sound of an Asgard beam made John shift his eyes to the bright light covering Caldwell's materialisation outside the conference room. Sam was the first to move towards him and greet him. The two of them shared a silent look before Caldwell glanced to Woolsey and John following behind her.

"Mr Woolsey, Colonel," Caldwell greeted them, taking a step away from Sam, who looked close to tears.

As Woolsey offered his greetings to Caldwell, John met Sam's eyes and raised an eyebrow in silent question. She just shook her head and gave him a watery smile to indicate she was fine, then turned to open the conference room doors.

The whole display of 'Classic Sam Avoidance Strategy' put him on edge, but this wasn't the time or place for dealing with that. Within moments, they were settled in the conference room behind locked doors, looking at Caldwell's evidence and discussing how much detail should be revealed to the general public.

"I had hoped it was some cruel joke," Woolsey said, his grim features tinged with bone-deep weariness as he stared unblinkingly at the wall-mounted screens. "This is…"

On the screens, Caldwell cycled through various scans of various planets that John only recognised by name. Sam, however, knew most of those planets intimately. Dakara. Cimmeria. Chulak. Langara. Edora. Then there were a whole bunch of designations starting with Ps. Sam seemed to know them too. She could probably tell stories about them and her missions with SG-1, could probably talk about the people she'd met, the stories she'd heard.

Seated next to her, John decided this was a moment when being professional meant less than being compassionate, so he slipped his hand under the table and found hers. She clenched it so tightly he almost felt faint, but he didn't mind. At least he was helping somewhat. He hadn't been able to do that the last time.

"As you can see, there was little left to be salvaged," Caldwell said solemnly, eyes passing cursorily over his listeners. He made no comment to the secret yet obvious handholding, a lack of action that only seemed to prove the gravity of the situation, and instead drew his gaze back to the screens. "On all the planets we visited, the surface had been obliterated. No trace of buildings, infrastructure, life signs, nothing." He paused, as if sensing the unspoken question. "Dr Novak and her team are still trying to figure out what kind of energy could have caused this type of damage. They claim it is like nothing we've seen before."

Woolsey shook his head in dazed disbelief. "So the aliens cripple the stargate network, destroy everything and then…just leave?"

"We found no trace of them in the Milky Way," Caldwell said, his voice grave. "Nor of any other ships. Only debris."

Sam's grip tightened. John glanced at her, eyebrows creased in worry, and he tried to squeeze back, but it looked like she didn't notice. She'd fixed her eyes upon the screens, and he wondered if it were the  _Odyssey_ that was weighing on her mind again or if it was the countless memories of Earth and the Milky Way that'd become sullied by the unknown aliens' devastation.

Caldwell noticed, but continued to address Woolsey. "We went over as much as we could in the time we'd been given to carry out our mission. The results were the same everywhere we went, including Earth. Nothing had been left untouched; even bunkers three miles down had been torn open in what can only be described as extremely high-precision targeting." His hand upon the table fisted slightly. "The Wraith superhive can't even compare to this methodical level of destruction."

Woolsey looked pained, nearly desperate. "Is there the  _slightest_  possibility that someone could've survived? Could they for instance have been abducted, or escaped elsewhere?"

Given what they'd seen, Woolsey was reaching, but John wasn't surprised. The man would have to confront the grieving and angry mob of Earth's surviving inhabitants later. Any shred of hope would've been preferable to  _this_.

A grim line touched Caldwell's lips as he paused for a moment. In the end, he said, "It's impossible to know. Based on what I've seen …it's like the aliens wanted to eradicate all traces of civilisation and sentient life in the galaxy. Even the stargates and spacegates are gone."

"Search and destroy," Sam said, her voice hoarse. Her grip had tightened even further, stopping the blood flow in John's hand, but it was her eyes that drew his attention. They were impossibly hard behind their teary sheen, glinting with old rage. "We waited too long to go back."

"There's nothing we could've done," Caldwell said, his expression equally hard. "In the face of such determination, we'd be no more than a speck on their windshield."

Sam didn't reply, but her lower lip began to tremble, her anger transforming into renewed grief. Feeling the weight himself, John squeezed her hand and then looked solemnly at Caldwell. "Any indication of where they went? Who they are?"

Caldwell's jaw clenched bitterly. "No. We're no closer to that, and I wouldn't recommend trying to get there either."

Frowning deeply, Woolsey leaned forward on his elbows. "What do you mean?"

"If this trip has proven me anything, then it is that we're in  _no_ position to fight back against these aliens. They even took out  _the Nox_." Caldwell gestured to the images displayed on the wall-mounted screens. "There are less than a thousand of us left and we're nowhere near levelling the playing field. Going after them now, or even in ten or twenty years, wouldn't just be suicide; it'd be genocide."

"I see." Woolsey exhaled deeply, removing his glasses to pinch the ridge of his nose. A different kind of weariness seemed to sweep over him. John recognised it immediately. Sam had worn it too. It'd been like a second skin to her for a long time, and it'd even popped up again now these past three days whenever she thought he wasn't looking:

_Like the weight of our very existence is on her shoulders._

With another sigh, Woolsey replaced his glasses and looked up, regaining all of their attention. "If the alien presence is truly gone from the Milky Way as you say, we will no doubt have the opportunity to conduct further investigations into what exactly happened there, as well as what our enemy might be like. As for what to do next…"

Woolsey paused and eyed them all in turn with the sort of grimness only shared by leaders in times of great trauma. "I'm going to tell our people that we continue to rebuild here in Pegasus. Here, we have allies, resources and shelter: lifelines that will ensure and safeguard our future. It is clear that we won't find those in the Milky Way anymore."

"And if someone insists on leaving?" John asked quietly. Although it was clear to him that doing so was crazy, grief did funny things to people; he'd seen that first-hand. "We've got some discontented and pro-return activists here. This might not dissuade them."

"We'll cross that bridge when it comes to it," Woolsey said lowly. "Needless to say, we cannot really spare anyone, but I would like to avoid using force to make them stay."

"Let's hope it doesn't come to that. We can't handle another internal conflict like before," Caldwell said. He turned to Woolsey with a grim look. "Though I imagine you're going to have your hands full nevertheless."

"Yes… I will talk with those it concerns personally," Woolsey said, sighing once more as he rubbed his brow wearily. "Once I know what to say. This is…overwhelming."

John agreed. By the look of Sam's freely running tears, she did too.

* * *

 **November 20** **th** **, 2010**

There was no reaction to her touch. The communication stone was just that: small, oval, and cold. Sam cradled it in her hand, stared at it, expecting it to transport her consciousness away even now after nearly two fruitless years.

But there was no one to take the call. Just like Earth, except now they truly knew that their homeworld was lost. By contrast, the  _Odyssey_  was still missing in action. It could still be out there in one piece, drifting in the coldness of space, but for some reason be unable to respond to her hails.

Fresh tears filled Sam's eyes as her hand clenched around the communication stone. As the pervading sense of  _failure_ spread throughout her body, her mind was flooded with scraps of memories that still clung on to her like a persistent virus.

" _So, how're you holding up, Carter?"_

" _As well as might be expected," Sam said, exhaling deeply in the dark of her office. It was past midnight local time and she could feel it. Her body threatened to sag forward against the desk. "We've begun evacuations of the settlements in the superhive's path. We're not leaving them behind just so we can run away."_

_On her laptop screen, General O'Neill smiled slightly. "That's my girl."_

_Comforted by his familiar tone of voice, Sam smiled too. "The IOA was notified of our course of action this morning. So far, no arguments."_

" _And there won't be," O'Neill added with a promise. "We're putting together some supplies for you on the_ Daedalus _once it arrives." He paused. "I think it goes without saying that all holiday passes are revoked until this thing blows over. Good luck with that."_

_Sam snorted. "Yeah, thanks, sir."_

" _Anytime, Carter," he said like nothing was out of the ordinary. Then after a moment, O'Neill's smirk faded into a sombre, tense expression that worsened for every silent second that passed._

_Unsettled by the sudden change in mood, Sam furrowed her brows. "I take it you didn't just call to check up on us…"_

" _No." O'Neill's jaw clenched grimly. "Homeworld Command needs that national treasure of yours."_

" _What's happened?" Sam's neck tensed uneasily, sensing the underlying severity of the call._

_O'Neill looked away at someone or something off-screen, then back at her with a sigh. "I hate to drag you into this mess, Carter. Way beyond both our paygrades." He paused, his eyes darkening. "But here's the deal… One of our ships went dark three weeks ago."_

Sam squeezed her eyes shut as shivers began to run down her spine. The storage room was cold at night, but it felt practically icy now. Every little breath of air brushing against her skin jumpstarted her nerves, sparking fresh shivers throughout her body, and every shiver made her acutely aware of the cool material of the container she was leaning against.

" _Sir, we've got a Wraith fleet headed our way. I_ _ **can't**_ _leave Atlantis," Sam said, her mind reeling._

" _You won't need to," O'Neill said lowly. "We're gonna send some equipment to you on the_ Daedalus  _along with the extra supplies for Atlantis. You can set up shop in the city once you've relocated."_

 _O'Neill paused and exhaled deeply, running a hand through his cropped grey hair. "Caldwell knows what's going on, he'll be working with you. To give you the gist, though… Once Atlantis' safety has been ensured, the_ Daedalus  _will be sent out to locate the other ship and complete its mission. Your job is to prepare her."_

Sniffling, Sam looked up and wiped her eyes, the action only worsening the puffiness and soreness of her cheeks. The storage room was eerily shadowed, the only light source coming from a couple of work lights she'd put up after they'd moved everything in here. It played tricks on her eyes and set the SGC and  _Daedalus_ logos in sharp relief to the containers they were stuck to, some of which still bore the signs of Xiaoyi's tampering and attempts to open them.

This was all that was left of Homeworld Command. Stacks of containers with their most classified intel, mission reports and selected prototype equipment, like the Earth-adapted long-range communication device sitting in front of Sam.

Sam opened her fist to stare at the cold, purple stone again.

" _Is it the_ Odyssey _, sir?" The General's stoic silence confirmed it. "Where did they—?"_

" _Somewhere far off. Let's leave it at that," O'Neill said, his jaw clenched. "You'll get the details when_ Daedalus  _arrives. Secure container, separate access codes, retinal scans, the works."_

In front of her eyes, the stone faded away and was replaced by printed words that still haunted her, though not as frequently as it'd done last year.

"—BLUEBELL dispatched to locate YELLOWSTONE—"

_The words didn't quite register. Sam sat speechless in the dimness of her office, staring at the folders of fragmented information before her, stamped with Homeworld Command's logo and the words CORE SECRETS, a classification she hadn't even known existed before the Evacuation._

_She'd known the_ Odyssey  _was travelling long-distance: why else would they need to use communication stones in order to stay in touch with Earth? But she would never have guessed they'd been sent to locate what could possibly be an abandoned Ancient shipyard in Bode's Galaxy, a 16-day journey for a Daedalus-class ship powered on a ZPM, or a 72-day journey without the ZPM. All because of a small mention in a database entry on the stargate's ninth chevron..._

" _This is—is—," she whispered out loud._

" _I know," Caldwell replied from his seat opposite her desk, his face covered in shadows. He looked like she felt: exhausted and worn down beyond belief. "If it still exists after twenty millennia, the shipyard would've been a game-changer against the Lucian Alliance…and maybe even these unknown bastards if the_ Odyssey _had reached it."_

 _Sam bit her lip and let her eyes trail to a different paper, dated much later than the first._ "No further contact with BLUEBELL after Checkpoint Golf. Asset never reached target galaxy and was declared MISSING IN ACTION on 15 November, 2008, 1400 hours. Location of YELLOWSTONE is still unknown. Re-assessment of situation therefore deemed necessary."

" _What do we do?" Sam asked quietly, mind still reeling from this latest shock. Five days ago, she'd had two simple missions: relocate and hide Atlantis from the Wraith superhive, and prepare_ Daedalus  _for an S &R mission somewhere far away. Now, she'd been saddled with many more, the most pressing being the immediate survival of all that remained of Earth's and maybe even the Milky Way's population._

" _Prioritise," Caldwell said, meeting her eyes with the same stoicism she'd seen in the General's face on the day of the Evacuation. "_ Daedalus _is needed here, to protect Atlantis and what's left of our people. We can't waste resources by going to look for a missing ship or a place that might not even exist anymore."_

_A big part of her agreed, but the opportunity this new intel presented couldn't be completely ignored. "Even if it might give us an edge against the Wraith?"_

" _Even then." Upon the armrests of his chair, Caldwell's hands fisted slightly. "It'd take too long and time's a commodity we can't waste. Not now with the Wraith superhive on our tails. Maybe not for a long time beyond that either: We're on our own. That makes us vulnerable. Who knows what's in store for us down the line?"_

" _But what if the crew of the_ Odyssey  _are still alive?" Sam's eyes were tearing up._

_Caldwell's jaw clenched. "They knew the risk."_

" _I can't leave them behind." She'd personally promised the General that she'd look into this, that she'd do her best to get the_ Odyssey _home. How could she break that?_

" _I don't like it either, Carter, but we don't have a choice in this," Caldwell said, getting to his feet. Entering the stream of light from her desktop lamp, she saw his face harden slightly. "They've been MIA for a month and haven't responded to the communication stones in that time. Chances are that they're already dead."_

" _But we don't know that," Sam said slowly. Staring up at him, she blinked away the tears in her eyes, her resolve hardening her insides. "For all we know, the_ Odyssey  _could be the reason why those aliens showed up in the first place."_

" _How? The_ Odyssey _never reached Bode's Galaxy, which means they must've disappeared somewhere in the void between here and there, which spans nearly 12 million lightyears," Caldwell said grimly. "What are the chances that they just happened to run into an unknown alien species whilst travelling through hyperspace at ZPM-powered speed?"_

 _Sam knew he had a point about that, but it wasn't enough. Something had still happened to the_ Odyssey  _and the General had ordered her to solve that mystery. "I can't let this go, Caldwell."_

 _Eying her for a moment, Caldwell eventually exhaled and looked worn-out again. "Fine. I won't stop you, but_ Daedalus  _stays here. We'll need it against the Wraith. You'll have to find some other way."_

" _I will."_

But she hadn't.

And as the memory faded away, a stab of pain echoed hollowly in Sam's chest and her head filled with the thoughts that had always lingered at the back of her mind since the Evacuation:  _'Nothing I did made a difference,' 'I failed', 'I had to make a choice', 'I'm sorry', 'I'm sorry, sir. I failed you too,' 'I didn't find them,'_ and _'I didn't get them home.'_

Then there were those new thoughts that had dominated all others in the past five days: ' _Now it's all gone._ _ **Completely**_ _gone '_ and  _'We're all that's left. We're on our own.'_

All of those churned in her head like the grinding of a wheel, each grind adding to the weight already weighing her down until she couldn't bear it anymore. Her vision blurred angrily and fresh tears ran down her cheeks. Gritting her teeth, she fisted the communication stone until the cold edges of the stone bit into her skin. Then, with a sharp heave, she flung the stone across the room, letting out a yell in the process.

She watched the stone skid across the floor and come to rest in front of the door, but it didn't bring her the satisfaction she'd wanted. Instead, she felt hollower than before and banged her fists into the cold floor in renewed frustration. When she caught sight of the square long-range communication device in front of her, she kicked it violently in the same direction as the stone.

The sudden  _whoosh_  of a door broke her out of the spell. Heart pounding slightly, Sam looked toward it, knowing exactly who it was. After all, there were no secrets between them anymore. No self- or duty-imposed barriers either. If she happened to disappear in the middle of the night these days, he knew why and where to find her.

"Okay…" On edge, John stared at the communication stone and device lying at his feet, then scrutinized her next. "That's new."

"I don't know why I'm still trying," said Sam, angrily wiping away stray tears from her puffy cheeks. "It's been two years. Caldwell was right. They're probably dead, just like the rest of them."

John's displeasure with her cynical tone was clear on his face, but he didn't comment on that. Instead, he leaned down to pick up the communication device and carried it inside the room. Sam stared at him returning the device carefully back to its steel case, then looked away, suddenly ashamed of what she'd done.

"Ever since Earth was lost, I just wanted to help them find their way home," she said eventually, thinking of all those nights she'd spent pouring over the files Homeworld Command had sent. "I couldn't do anything about Earth, the damn aliens, about my friends, but I thought: 'if I could just find the  _Odyssey_ and bring them **home** …'" Her breath hitched and fresh tears welled up in her eyes as the feeling of failure returned. "But I can't, John. They're  _gone._ "

She heard the  _click_ of the steel case being shut, then the shuffle of feet as John walked over and sat down next to her. Gently, he pulled her close and Sam rested her head on his shoulder, squeezing her eyes shut in an attempt at keeping her tears at bay.

"You've done more than anyone could possibly ask for," John said quietly, dropping a kiss on the top of her head. "You kept us going after Earth was lost and you made sure we survived, whatever it took. Even with all the shit and pain thrown your way, you pushed through and got us to where we are today. Not all have turned out for the best, but you can't take the blame for all of that. We've all had our parts to play."

"It still hurts, though," she whispered, her throat constricting in response to the images of the General, Cam, Teal'c, Vala, Mark and everyone else she'd lost on Earth flashing through her mind. "I can't let them go."

"No one's telling you to." John held her tighter, the words vibrating lowly through his larynx, his exposed skin warm and comforting in the otherwise chilly storage room. "Just do what you've done so far: keep moving forward whatever happens. That's what they would've wanted."

She knew he was right. O'Neill had practically told her so himself the day of the Evacuation:  _"That's what you keep, Carter. Don't stop smiling."_  But she couldn't do it alone. After two years, she knew that now.

You need people around you to survive, to accept what has happened and to move on.

You need to love, to not be afraid to get hurt, and to push through no matter how difficult the going gets.

You need to accept that pain doesn't go away, but that it can shrink to a manageable size, and that it's okay to be happy even when you're sad.

She knew all that now.

So, burrowing into John's warmth and soaking up all its comfort and security, Sam managed a smile.

**FIN**

* * *

" _And so there must be in life something like a catastrophic turning point, when the world as we know ceases to exist. A moment that transforms us into a different person from one heartbeat to the next."_

―  **Jan-Philipp Sendker** , The Art of Hearing Heartbeats

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there you have it. The story is finally complete, and hopefully it has both made you wonder and given you answers. It took a long while to get me here, but I believe the story wouldn't have been what it is today without that journey. (I guess I understand why George R. R. Martin spends so much time on his stories...)
> 
> When I set out to write this story, I wanted to explore what grief does to people. It is such an unavoidable part of our life and yet many people actually try to avoid it, myself included. Since then, I have experienced unfathomable grief myself and gone through all the five stages: denial and isolation, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. (I'm actually still working on that last bit.) This story has been shaped as a result of that, and along the way I've reflected on what it actually means to move on. Here are some of those thoughts:
> 
> Life is full of ups and downs, but I think that's the point. You wouldn't appreciate the ups fully unless you've experienced the downs, and living a life without either wouldn't truly be a life. Finding happiness or overcoming grief isn't just about the easy fixes. It's about the hard work and devotion you put into your friendships, relationships and self-worth. It's about picking yourself up every day, walk out the door, and go on living and loving again, despite what has happened or might happen. It's damn excruciating at times, but when you get up from the bottom…you look at everything with new eyes, and that feeling is wonderful.
> 
> Now, since I'm such a nice person, I will give you a couple of bonus scenes too. Just to show you there's a light at the end of the tunnel for everyone, whatever the shape it might take. :)
> 
> – neela


	30. BONUS: Three years later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three years later, Earth's survivors celebrate Christmas.

**BONUS**

* * *

**Three years later…**

**Christmas Day, 2013 – Remembrance Day**

Hailey could sense him staring at her, could see his towering, dark frame in the far corner of her eye. Most likely, his arms were crossed in that blatant display of disapproval, his eyes narrowed darkly, and his lips nothing more than a thin line behind his beard. The whole thing made her roll her eyes and hold the gun a little straighter.

Down at the other end of the shooting range, three targets were already headless and gutless. The forth was right in her line of sight, a black inhuman blob that no longer scared her. In a quick succession of shots, nothing was left of its round head but a gaping hole through which she could see the sandbags stacked up against the far wall.

Only then did she take her finger off the trigger, turn the safety off, put down the gun and start unplugging her earplugs. With a glare, she turned to Ronon. " _What_? I can't practice anymore?"

"The commemoration ceremony starts in fifteen minutes," Ronon said unflinchingly with just an underlying tone of admonition. Like a prowling wolf, he unfroze and sauntered towards her, holding out a clothes bag. "You need to change."

Rolling her eyes again, Hailey grabbed the clothes bag and turned in one swift revolution, marching to the closest locker rooms. As she changed from her faded and well-worn PT gear into a black Traveler-style dress suitable for the occasion, she wished – not for the last time – that Ronon wasn't such a stickler for formality, or such a nag. If she could, she would've dropped going, but he'd probably just throw her over his shoulder again.

_You'd think he was Conan the Barbarian._

"Here," Hailey said with barely restrained disdain after exiting the locker rooms. Off to the side, Ronon was putting away the gear she'd used earlier. She raised her voice a little for emphasis. "Satisfied?"

Facing her, Ronon gave her the once-over, thought about it, then nodded and started walking towards the nearest transporter.

_He always does that_ , Hailey groaned inwardly as she trotted after him in a pair of Traveler high heels that matched her dress.  _Use your words, damnit!_

She grumbled all the way to the commemoration ceremony, barely apologising to the people they had to manoeuvre past in order to get to the two empty seats in the middle of the crowd. As soon as her butt hit the chair, she crossed her arms and pointedly looked away from Ronon, prepared to pout like a sullen teenager throughout the ceremony.

Then Sam took the stage and the general buzz of the crowd died down, replaced instead by that familiar, heavy atmosphere that never seemed to lighten…and Hailey's throat constricted.

"Today, we commemorate those who lost their lives five years ago," Sam was saying, her voice echoing slightly in speakers all around the room. "Today, we remember."

_Here we honour the price of freedom._

All else faded to the background as Hailey's flight instinct kicked in, reminding her why she'd been procrastinating earlier, but there was nowhere to run. No targets to take down, nothing to give her back a sense of control; to let her avoid what was to come.

Only Ronon, who calmly took her hand and held it.

Hailey remembered air was supposed to come in through her nose and out through her mouth. For the rest of the commemoration ceremony, she focussed on that, telling herself that this wasn't something she could just push in front of her, no matter how much she wanted to. She had to let herself  _feel_ , to face those lingering feelings of survivor's guilt that still emerged in moments like this. Otherwise, she'd never be able to let things go; she'd be a victim forever.

_And I'm more than that,_ she told herself, breathing deeply. _I'm a survivor._

By the time it was over and the heavy atmosphere gradually began to give room for smiles, laughter and friendly conversations, Hailey felt like she'd run a mile. She opened her eyes, realised her and Ronon's hands were still intertwined, and looked at him.

"Thank you," she said quietly.

Ronon offered a rare smile and nodded. "You're welcome."

* * *

Four years ago, he'd been somewhat uneasy with the idea of drinking coffee and eating sandwiches immediately after the commemoration ceremony, feeling the need for some time in-between. Today, however, he couldn't imagine it any other way. People needed the casual setting to react to the feelings and thoughts arising during the ceremony, and in the four that'd been held so far, Woolsey had seen it all.

Unfathomable grief. Incredible anger. Haunting silence. Desperate pleas. Solemn acceptance.

But his favourite was the scene unfolding in front of him: Children running around in innocent glee, parents chasing them or calling out warnings, babies crying inconsolably, upset parents trying every trick in the book…and laughter.

_There's the future,_ Woolsey thought, smiling behind his coffee cup.  _Just as it should be._

A slender hand touched his arm, drawing his attention. "Did you want meat or vegetarian?"

Woolsey turned to face his wife, smiling. "Vegetarian, please."

Shaking her head of red curls in that familiar and endearing gesture he'd fallen in love with when they met on the Genii homeworld two years ago, Ileen sighed. "You are getting thinner, Richard. It is not good for you." Nevertheless, she complied and picked up a vegetarian sandwich for him and a chicken one for her. "Will you bring my tea?"

"Of course," Woolsey said and went back to the drinks table as Ileen went to join their friends. Eyes searching for the pots labelled 'Tea', he didn't immediately register another familiar presence to the side before she spoke up.

"Dr Carter's eulogy was well-spoken." Raising an eyebrow in surprise, Woolsey turned to face Xiaoyi, who was pouring herself a cup of tea. With a graceful movement, she set the teapot down next to him and picked up her cup, then looked up to meet his eyes. "Don't you agree?"

"Yes," Woolsey said, letting his initial surprise at her praise bloom into a smile instead. "I am happy she finally agreed to hold it. I've been asking her for years."

"Sharing your pain with others can be difficult," Xiaoyi said, sipping her tea calmly. Turning slightly away to face the room, she let her gaze trail seemingly casually over its occupants. "Sometimes, time is necessary."

"Wise words."

"Experience is the bitterest path to wisdom," Xiaoyi said dismissively, letting her eyes drift slightly across the room.

"Very true." Hiding his knowing smile as he recognised Confucius' idea behind her statement, Woolsey poured Ileen's tea and then gestured in the direction he'd seen her go. "Care to join us?"

Although she tried to cover it, a hesitant look crossed Xiaoyi's otherwise composed face.

"Ileen would be pleased," Woolsey said gently. "She's been afraid that she greatly upset you with her questions at dinner last time."

Xiaoyi seemed to hold back an annoyed sigh. "Very well."

To anyone else, the gesture would've been considered rude, but Woolsey just smiled, unoffended. The public figure Shen Xiaoyi might be many things still – a political headache, an annoying critic, and an ice queen – but underneath those layers was a person who'd softened over the past three years. Sure, that side was rarely seen beyond the private company of those she – reluctantly, perhaps – called friends, but it was there nevertheless.

_That_  he considered his greatest achievement in life.

* * *

Lazy Christmas jazz sounded from the speakers in Little Chow. The light was dimmed and candles were burning on tables and walls, creating a subtle, comfortable atmosphere that contrasted the raucous Christmas party he'd left behind in the larger mess hall.

Although preferring the intimacy of Little Chow to the thick crowds, Caldwell couldn't deny that the other party had been...enjoyable. There'd been a profound sense of joy and freedom as people lost themselves to the electronic dance music, reminding Caldwell of some of the post-mission parties he'd attended in his youth.

Woolsey had called it catharsis, a necessary loss of control and need for celebration of new chances to offset the solemn, anniversary of Earth's loss. All Caldwell knew was that there'd probably be some walks of shame in the morning given what he'd witnessed before he left, some of which bordered a little too close to breaking Atlantis' fraternisation regulations.

Still, he wouldn't worry about that today. Today, he wasn't the General, just Steven Caldwell, enjoying a quiet Christmas meal in Little Chow before returning for a quiet evening in at his quarters.

"Merry Christmas, sir."

Passing by his table, Colonel Kevin Marks gave him a nod of acknowledgement before joining a group of  _Daedalus_ crew seated at a different table. Emma Cooper was there, as well as Telman and Garvin, and even Dr Novak. Watching them chat and laugh together, Caldwell smiled.

After everything that'd happened, he was happy to see others happy. They deserved it.

* * *

"This is really unfair! I'm living in a closet and you get  _this_  place."

In the process of setting the dining table, Daniel rolled his eyes when he heard McKay's outburst coming from the balcony and turned to glance at Sam. "That's one sleepover you owe me."

Collapsed on the couch, Sam rubbed her eyes and sighed. "After seven plus years, you'd think I'd see that coming."

"I'm surprised you're able to keep a coherent thought at all, let alone a whole speech," Hailey remarked from where she was putting the finishing touches to the Pegasus-style Christmas tree. "I found your tablet computer in the cooler."

"Which is perfectly normal," Keller said with a reassuring smile in Sam's direction. "Your hormones are out of whack, but it'll pass. Happens to everyone. I heard Kiang found her hairbrush buried in a field of tava beans on the mainland."

Teyla laughed as she set down a bowl of Athosian fruit salad next to Daniel. "When I was breastfeeding Torren, I found myself many times in the opposite end of the city without knowing how I got there."

"John's already locking the door so I don't wander off," Sam said. Despite her obvious exhaustion from sleep deprivation and the toll of Remembrance Day, she was smiling. "He's worried my old pilot instincts will kick in and he'll find me on the other side of the solar system in the middle of the night."

A string of laughs went through the room, but it turned to winces as the tunes of Frosty the Snowman suddenly blasted through the apartment at ear-deafening volume.

"I told them not to fiddle with the controls!" Hailey grimaced and stormed off to Sam's study before Daniel could react. Within seconds of her entrance, the volume had died down and the rest of them waited with bated breath for the other shoe to drop…

And sighed when it did.

"What's going on?" John popped his head in from the balcony, apparently reacting to the loud music from before. He then noticed the loud wail coming from his and Sam's bedroom and frowned. "Want me to get him?"

"No, I'll do it." Groaning as she rose to her feet, Sam shambled towards the bedroom.

"I'll come with you," Keller said and jumped to her feet, leaving Teyla and Daniel alone in the living room.

Daniel turned back to the table he'd just set and scrutinised it. It held enough diverse food to feed a really picky army, which was a necessity with McKay present.

"Right, that should be it," he said aloud. "Just the meat and drinks left."

Teyla touched his arm with a smile. "It looks delicious, as always."

"Thank you." Warming comfortably from the touch, Daniel put his hand on hers. "Feels a little more like Christmas now. We're getting closer every year."

"It is as it should be. I am glad to hear that," Teyla said, her eyes soft and gentle.

They heard the balcony door slide open all the way, admitting both a cool winter chill and the heavenly smells of John and Ronon's barbeque. Ronon entered first, carrying two large plates laden with grilled meat, followed soon by John and McKay with two matching plates each.

John was speaking to the latter over his shoulder. "Y'know, Rodney, all you gotta do is ask Jennifer to move in with you and you can get out of that 'closet'. What's it been? Three years? Get a move on, buddy."

"I second that," Daniel said, sharing a smirk with Teyla before she moved off to fetch the drinks.

"Me three," Ronon chimed in as he set down his plates on the table.

Halting awkwardly, McKay began to stutter, trying to come up with some sort of argument, but he never had the time. The next moment, Keller and Sam came out of the now silent bedroom and the doctor was clearly over the moon.

"He's so adorable," Keller was telling Sam. "Kinda makes you think, doesn't it?"

Overhearing that, John, Ronon and Daniel chuckled while McKay's eyes widened like a deer's. He was startled out of his reverie a moment later when John jolted him teasingly with a 'there-you-have-it' glance, before he set down his last plate of meat.

"Oh, is it done?" Becoming aware of McKay and the food in his hands, Keller broke into a grin. "I'm famished."

From the study, Hailey led Reika and Torren in front of her, all of them whispering and giggling from something the young captain apparently had said. From another room, Teyla emerged balancing a tray of drinks and thanked Sam when the latter offered to help.

As he looked around at all of them, Daniel smiled. While there was a certain sense of catharsis and belonging to something greater by taking part in the commemoration ceremony, he much preferred this part of their tradition: ending Remembrance Day in the company of their closest family and friends.

"I'd say it's time," Daniel said in response to Keller's question. "Let's eat!"

* * *

Sam's hand met nothing but warm covers. She opened her eyes in confusion and looked around. It was still dark outside. They couldn't have been asleep for long. Where was he?

There was no sound of Jacob crying. Everything was quiet, almost eerily so. Sam frowned. Had John been called out? Had she been so tired that she didn't even notice a radio call? Whatever it was, now that she noticed the eerie silence, she couldn't lie still anymore. She had to check on Jacob.

Despite the sluggish weariness in her body that told her she hadn't gotten enough sleep yet, Sam left the warm bed behind and picked up a bathrobe on the way out of the bedroom. It was oversized and smelled like John, which calmed her somewhat as her sleep-deprived mind began to worry.

However, out in the living room, she halted. A low hum drifted from the nursery, sounding familiar. As she approached, frowning, the hum became distinct words and that irrational part of her brain shut off its warning klaxons, replaced instead by a smile.

"—'walked alone'," John hummed slowly, barely audible. Standing outside the open doorway, Sam heard Jacob's loud, sleepy breaths "—'hiked a hundred highways, never found a home'." She peeked inside.

Dressed only in his boxer shorts, John was pacing back and forth on the floor, Jacob cradled against his chest in the Athosian-style blanket they'd gotten from Teyla in the baby shower. A stream of moonlight escaped the blinds and fell across the floor. Whenever John stepped into it, she saw his eyes were closed. Peaceful.

"'Still in all I'm happy'," John continued the song, patting Jacob's back as he paced. "'The reason is, you see…"

Coming to the end of his path, he turned and his now open eyes met hers. A sleepy grin broke out on her face. John halted, the peaceful expression replaced by awkward embarrassment. Jacob began to protest, squirming and making small grunts. Sam only raised an eyebrow and John finally smirked.

"'Once in a while along the way…" he continued, rocking the baby slowly as he paced. "'Love's been good to me.'" His voice hushed to a hum and he repeated the chorus. In the end, Jacob snored.

By then, Sam had left them and gone back to bed. She listened to John's deep baritone hum until she'd dozed off and didn't wake until she felt the bed dip with his weight.

The covers shuffled until an arm tipped her around and John spooned up behind her. His warmth spread through her and Sam adjusted until she fit perfectly. She squeezed his arm.

"You should sing more," she mumbled, half-smiling and sleepy.

John dropped a kiss on her shoulder. "I don't know what you're talking about. Go back to sleep."

Sam chuckled and snuggled closer, basking in that wonderful feeling of happiness.

**FIN**

* * *

 

****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the read! Hopefully you enjoyed these bonus scenes. :)
> 
> Now, I've rarely asked for reviews, but now that I'm done, I have a question for you: which is your favourite part of this story?


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